My Turn

My Turn

Madilyn DeRose

Copyright © Madilyn DeRose 2024

All rights reserved.

ISBN: 9798336920895

Independently Published

The characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious. Any similarities to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.

No part of this book may be reproduced, or stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without express written permission of the author.

Cover design by: Madilyn DeRose using Canva & Adobe Stock

Printed in the United States of America

Dedication

Mask? Check. Big dick? Check. Unhealthy obsession and a complete obliteration of morality? That’s a given.

Just open wide and let him give you everything he has. Don’t forget to say thank you.

Author’s Note

Important Remarks About Content

I probably don’t need to say this, but please for the love of all the gods, don’t use this as a handbook for anything. The content in this book is disturbing and will definitely not be for everyone. Always heed the trigger warnings and if you have an actual stalker, call the police.

This book has two separate endings and there is a note at the beginning of each so that you know which you’re reading. I love a good no HEA ending, but I know there are a huge amount of people who do not, so I wrote two. Neither are canon. Believe whichever one you want. The buildup is the same, but the outcome differs.

Will there be another book? There sure will and it’ll be a standalone. You’ll figure it out at the end.

Please prioritize yourself and your health

Trigger Warnings

To ensure the health and safety of all readers, please review the trigger warnings listed here. Use your best judgment to determine if this is a safe book for you to read. I’ve done my best to determine possible triggers that may be included in the content and themes of this book to varying degrees.

There is explicit NONCON in this book. In an effort to avoid getting flagged, I’ve moved my extensive list to my website. Click the link below or navigate to https://authormadilynderose.square.site

Trigger Warning

Please for the love of gods heed the warnings on my site! This shit is DARK. you don’t know what any of the terms mean, please do your research or reach out to me beforehand.

Contents

Dedication

Author’s Note

Trigger Warnings

Prologue

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Chapter 33

Chapter 34

Chapter 35

Chapter 36

Chapter 37

Chapter 38

Chapter 39

Chapter 40

Chapter 41

Chapter 42

Chapter 43

Chapter 44

Chapter 45

Chapter 46

Epilogue

Chapter 44B

Chapter 45B

Chapter 46B

Epilogue

Prologue

Jayce

Sometimes, two people love each other but remain in a stagnant state that keeps them apart. Maybe stagnant wasn’t the correct term for what I had with Alana. We were always moving forward and we were together all the time, but not in a romantic way.

Why, you might ask? Two reasons.

Reason number one: she was in a relationship for the entirety of our high school years, college, and beyond. They were ‘end game’ in her mind. Alana and Jake started dating freshman year and they went together like peanut butter and jelly. I was partial to peanut butter and Nutella.

The second reason was that they were no longer together. And it wasn’t pretty.

Reason number two point five, I guess: Jake was my brother. My twin brother. This wasn’t one of those situations where I would say that he was the better one, the more attractive one, the jock, etc., etc. No, we were a lot alike. We both played sports and we got the same degree. We were likable, charming, and roguishly handsome with our dark, wavy hair, bright blue eyes, and jawlines that women fawned over for some reason. Weird, but I wouldn’t complain about it. The only thing that made a difference was that he met her first.

I reached over to squeeze her hand. She dipped her chin, unable to look at me. I trailed my eyes over her black dress, then admired her chestnut hair that was thrown into a bun to hide that it hadn’t been washed, probably since she got the news. She’d been staying at my place because their little duplex wasn’t habitable. I wouldn’t complain about her presence, but I wished it was under better circumstances that didn’t result in her crying herself to sleep every night.

Moving my gaze to the front, I tried not to scowl at the portrait of him on a pedestal. Some people were still filing up to the stage to touch his casket and say whatever bullshit words they could conjure on the spot.

It was ridiculous. Words to the dead were for you, not for them. They couldn’t fucking hear you anyway. Even if they could, it didn’t do any good. If I was dead and had to listen to all the things people said, I’d laugh. Half of these people probably hadn’t even thought about him in years and another chunk of them couldn’t care less that he was dead.

Unable to help myself, I moved my arm around Alana’s shoulders as the priest took his place. None of us were even religious, but I didn’t plan the funeral.

I tipped my head forward and inhaled. It didn’t matter that she hadn’t been taking care of herself. Everything about her called out to me. Even in her darkest state, she was like carrion and I was a vulture, circling above her until it was my turn to feed.

It was my fucking turn.

There was actually a third reason I’d never made any moves up to this point. Ever since my brother brought her home when we were all fourteen, something had been festering inside of me. An obsession, perhaps. I was fixated on her. Not just her, but the idea of becoming something she couldn’t escape and, eventually, didn’t want to escape.

There was this image in my head of how it would go down. Did it matter in the long run? Objectively, no, but it was a game I couldn’t stop playing. I wanted her to beg for me, to give herself to me in a way she didn’t even know she was capable of. After so many years of watching her, a darkness had arisen inside of me. Maybe it existed before, but she caused it to metastasize.

I knew everything there was to know about Alana. I’d seen her when she didn’t know anybody was watching. Those were my favorite moments. Under my gaze, she’d unknowingly undressed for me, she’d cried the sort of tears one only released when they were alone, she’d punched walls and talked to herself when things were bad. She’d touched her sweet pussy, coated her fingers in the arousal I was dying to taste. To own. To be the cause of.

Not yet.

If I made a move now, she’d only see him. I was patient. I’d been patient for a very long time. Like all of the years before, I’d wait and I’d watch. She didn’t know it, but Alana had never had a free moment since she was fourteen.

I saw everything. She needed me, I needed her. She was never going to escape me.

Alana Monroe was mine. Then, now, and forever.

Chapter 1

Alana

October 2024

Year from hell was a stupid fucking phrase. Hell sounded like a better time than what I’d been through. At least in hell, you could expect that there would be an eternity of torment. Plus, you’d earned your place there. That is if the religious nuts are to be believed.

Life was actually so much worse because it led you on and made you believe things were going to work out for you, then it snatched that shit right out of your hands like a greedy bitch.

My fiancé died suddenly eleven months ago. It was tragic and heartbreaking, obviously, but it was an accident. The neighbors who lived in our duplex forgot that candles were burning when they left the house and it looked like their cat had knocked one of them over. It caught the curtains on fire and, voila, it was a recipe for trauma and the end to my relationship of nearly twelve years.

I’d been on a field trip at the time and Jake, well… He was drunk, according to the tox screen. He hadn’t been badly burned, but by the time the firefighters came, smoke inhalation had claimed his eternal soul or whatever. All because of a candle and a cat. I never asked if it survived. If I found out that it hadn’t, I’d probably go completely off the deep end.

As I erased the words on the whiteboard, I felt eyes on me. Turning, I found Jane, the teacher whose classroom was next door to mine. Her dark hair was in her signature pigtails and she was staring at me in that creepy way I’d come to despise since Jake’s death- rueful smile, hands in an awkward position, sad eyes, and enough intensity to make me wonder if I could manage to jam an expo marker into her eye socket.

Pity. I hated it. One would think it’d disappear after almost a year, but some people held onto it for too long and I had no idea why.

“How are you, Jane?” I asked, returning to my task.

“I’m good, I’m good,” she crooned.

“Can I help you with something?”

“Oh, I wanted to check in. It’s been a while.”

“We talked earlier this week.”

She took a step closer. “About work, yeah. I wanted to see how you’re doing. It’s been almost a year.”

I clenched my teeth and focused on clearing the last of the words from the board. When it was clean, I considered using the spray on it, but I was pretty sure Jane was going to stay here until I left, so screw that.

“Everything is good,” I said with a smile. “Time heals all wounds, as they say.”

“Is that true?”

I sighed. “I don’t know, Jane. Excuse me.”

After grabbing my backpack from under my desk, I moved toward the door. She followed me out, then waited as I locked it. If I thought I’d escape by heading down the hall, I was mistaken.

What could she possibly want?

“Halloween is in two days,” she chirped from my side.

“Yes, it is.”

“I noticed that you didn’t sign up as a volunteer for the trunk-or-treat event.”

“No, I have plans.”

We were here five days a week, sometimes more. Not only did we deal with teenagers suffering from raging hormones, but we were also underpaid and overworked. It baffled me that anyone would want to volunteer to spend more time here. For free, nonetheless.

Maybe I was a bad person. It was something I’d thought about a lot since Jake died. More and more, I found myself being cynical and feeling a general sense of discontentment toward humanity in general. So many people were kind after it happened, but I couldn’t help convincing myself that they didn’t actually care. They were going through the motions of what altruism was supposed to mean and doing what was expected when someone died.

Worse, they could be acting genuine. That sort of made me nauseous. I didn’t want their pity and their kind gestures. A fridge full of shitty casseroles was meant to help me through the ‘dark times.’ They didn’t help at all. In fact, my best friend Jayce threw most of them away because I barely ate the first month and he hated casseroles. According to him, they were a crime against humanity and disrespectful to the grieving. He might be a little dramatic.

I didn’t purposely waste the food, but I still felt shitty about it. My parents always guilted me by reminding me that there were starving kids in the world. Sorry, kids. Grief was a bigger beast for me at the time.

“You should really stop by,” Jane went on. She might have been talking the whole way to the parking lot, but I’d never know. “Principal McKay works so many hours. Any stress we can take off of his shoulders would be a blessing for him.”

Offering her a sickly sweet smile, I unlocked my SUV. “I’ll totally consider it.”

“See you tomorrow,” she called as I quickly shut the door and backed out of the spot.

“Yeah, see you tomorrow,” I muttered. “Unfortunately.”

If one of my seniors tried to make another ridiculous excuse for not having their project finished, I might decide that sacrificing my soul to Lucifer was a better option than working at a high school. Seriously, why had I thought teaching minors was a good path for me? I’d always intended to go back to school for a higher degree so I could teach at the university level, but that dream seemed impossible now, so it looked like I was stuck with seventeen-year-olds. Better than kids, but still.

As I pulled up to my apartment, I grimaced. My old duplex I’d lived in with Jake wasn’t anything grand, but at least it had a driveway and a small backyard. Plus, I wasn’t surrounded by a bunch of other tenants. I’d managed to get a second-floor unit here, which I’d been adamant about for obvious reasons. If someone really wanted to hurt me, I was sure they wouldn’t be deterred, but it made my place less desirable for crimes of convenience. Allegedly.

After Jake died, I stayed with Jayce for a couple of months. He’d insisted that I should just move in with him so that I wouldn’t be alone, but I needed my own place. He was amazing and had helped me through the initial pain of my loss. We saw each other at least twice every week. Living together, though, was bound to fuck up our relationship. I’d seen friends have a major falling out after trying to be roommates and I couldn’t stand the idea of that happening with us.

Besides, I was twenty-six. It pushed my budget to live by myself, but it was the natural progression of life to go out on your own.

Since he’d been worried about me, I’d let him install a digital door lock system that would alert both of us if anyone tried to break in. That made me feel a little better. The only two who had a code were me and him. He only lived a couple of miles away, so he’d be here within ten minutes if anything ever happened- probably faster than the police. He was huge too and I had no doubt he’d take down anyone who wanted to hurt me.

I punched in my code to open the front door, then let out a heavy breath once I stepped inside. Another day done. Another to get through tomorrow. Halloween was on Thursday and the school decided to give the students Friday off. I was going to do everything in my power to catch up on my work so that I could have a free day too. God knows I needed that.

My phone started vibrating, making me groan. Speak of the devil. He always seemed to know when I got home.

“Roadkill café,” I answered. “You kill it, we grill it.”

Jayce’s deep laugh made me smile. “So, you forgot to take your crazy pills again, I see.”

“Ha ha. Why are you calling me?” I stripped out of my shirt and tossed it into my room. It landed on the floor, which was fine. I’d get to it. Eventually.

He hummed thoughtfully. “You should be jumping for joy and thanking me.”

“Alright, I’ll bite. Why am I thanking you?”

“Because I did it.”

“Did what?”

“It.”

I stopped in the middle of throwing a frozen pizza in the oven. “You’re kidding.”

“Nope. This is not a drill. I’ll come over and we can pop a fresh bottle of this stuff.”

“Hell yes- Wait.” I checked the date on my phone and nearly stomped my foot. “I have something to do tonight.”

There was a short silence on the other end. “More important than this?”

I wanted to say no. We’d been working on this for years, ever since we were broke college students. Bailing on my plans sounded like an amazing idea considering I’d been going back and forth about canceling for a week already. It was important, though- a positive move toward a life that wasn’t overshadowed by a dead fiancé. That was a step away from being a widow and I didn’t want it to define me.

“Yeah, I’m sorry. I have… a date.”

It was stupid to feel like I was doing something wrong. Jake was Jayce’s brother, but we’d talked about how shitty it would be when I put myself out there again. He knew it would come eventually and I didn’t think that he would be upset about it.

So, why did I feel such a sense of shame right now?

“A date,” he repeated. “Last minute thing?”

“No, I’ve had it planned for a week. I wasn’t sure about it, but I think I need to, you know?”

“Yeah.” Silence again. “Yeah, yeah. It’s a step, right? You could’ve told me, though.”

“I wasn’t sure if I’d go through with it and telling you made it feel locked in, I guess.”

“You know I’ll support whatever you decide to do, Alana.”

I shivered a little. “I know, Jayce. Rain check?”

“Sure. Maybe we can crack it on Halloween.”

I snorted a laugh. “If Jane doesn’t physically force me to go to the trunk-or-treat at school.”

“If she does, I’ll cut off her stupid fucking pigtails. Or I’ll kidnap you,” he added with a laugh.

“Maybe you should. God knows I need the excitement in my life.”

“Rope or zip ties?”

“Hm. Rope.”

“Gag or duct tape?”

Shaking my head, I started rifling through the clothes in my closet. “Neither. Don’t you want to hear me scream?”

“Alright, Alana.” His voice had taken on a darker quality that sent a chill down my spine. “Mask or no mask?”

I tried to keep my breathing even as I pulled out a pair of nice black skinny jeans. If I wore a pretty shirt, it would be appropriate attire for dinner. The alternative was a dress and that wasn’t about to happen.

“Alana,” he prompted, almost musically.

“Mask, for sure. Kidnappers are never actually sexy.”

When he laughed, he sounded more like his usual self, thankfully. Jayce was absolutely sexy, just like his brother, of course. The thought immediately made my chest ache.

“Fine, go on your date, but I’m claiming you for Halloween. No exceptions.”

“I’m yours for the whole night,” I agreed. “Don’t tell me we’re going to a party, though. We’re too old.”

“We’re single, hot, and have no kids. Don’t pull that ‘too old’ bullshit with me.”

With a growl, I shimmied the pants over my ass. Had I gained a few pounds? I needed to delete all the food delivery apps on my phone and force myself to bring lunch to work, but have you met Taco Bell? It was a sad girl’s wet dream and that was saying something considering depression had killed my sex drive this year.

“Are you jogging?” Jayce asked. “You sound out of breath.”

“Go enjoy one of your cool bottles of wine, bitch face.”

He was still laughing when I ended the call. I sat on the edge of the bed to let my heart rate slow down.

Fucking skinny jeans. They were officially the bane of my existence.

Chapter 2

Jayce

A date. A real date. A date with a man.

The words kept filtering through my mind and nothing could deter them. It wasn’t ideal, that was for sure.

Who the fuck was I kidding? It was completely unacceptable.

I didn’t know how I’d missed this. She hadn’t been texting anyone new. When I pulled up her emails, I scrolled through them but didn’t find anything suspicious there. The only places she’d gone in the last week had been the coffee shop, the school, home, and the grocery store.

Don’t tell me she agreed to a date with one of the cashiers. She used self-checkout when she went, though. If someone random approached her, I couldn’t imagine that she’d say yes.

I didn’t follow her everywhere, otherwise I’d never get anything done. Her phone provided her location to me at all times and unless she went somewhere new or was there at a strange time, I trusted that she was okay.

Mistake, apparently. It had led to someone finding a way to ask her out.

Unacceptable.

Keeping my eye on the map on my phone, I pulled on a hoodie. I should’ve asked more questions. Where did she meet him? What was his name? What the fuck were his qualifications? He sure as fuck didn’t deserve her time.

I laughed as I slipped on my shoes. The fucking audacity of some man to think he could go after what was mine. If he touched her, he was going to regret it.

Maybe I should just stake my claim on her already, but it wasn’t time. She wasn’t ready for it, regardless of what she thought about dating. This guy she was about to see was a guppy, whereas I was a shark who had every intention of devouring her whole.

When I did take her, I didn’t want there to be a single remaining thought of my brother. When she looked at me, she wouldn’t see him, think of him, or even remember him. She would be completely consumed by me and once she was, nothing could save her. Not that she would want that.

This date, though… Maybe she needed to be punished for making such a terrible decision. For betraying me. She didn’t even tell me about it until today.

Oh, sweet, delicious Alana. Yeah, a bite was exactly what I needed.

The icon on the map began to move, so I grabbed my keys and headed into the garage. I climbed into my Bronco and waited for the door to rise. Within seconds, I was on the road, heading toward that little dolphin icon on my phone.

It was time to up the ante on this game. We’d been playing for twelve years, so it was about time.

*****

Fingers: gone. He’d brushed her shoulder with those disgusting things. Teeth: gone. He kept smiling at her. Tongue: you guessed it. He thought he was funny and charming. Every one of her laughs had been forced so far.

Look, I wasn’t a psychopath. I had my wits about me and I approached things rationally. Usually. Not when it came to Alana. Why? I didn’t really know. It had always been that way, ever since Jake brought her home and she smiled at me when she told me her name.

Jake and Alana sounded dumb. That was my first thought as a hormonal teenager. Jayce and Alana? That should be printed on a wedding invitation pronto.

Jaykob and Jayson- two twin brothers who were in love with the same girl, but nobody knew. I was never obvious about it. I dated and acted invested in my relationships, but I only ever had eyes for her. With her chestnut brown hair and round, piercing green eyes, how could I not? All those other girls were practice. When I fucked them, I saw her. When I gave them pleasure, it was so that I could learn how to make her scream one day.

Every scenario I could come up with to take her from Jake had flaws, so I’d never tried. If I got her to sleep with me, I’d be the enemy. Get her to fall in love with me and she’d feel torn. Even if she chose me, she’d feel guilty and probably wouldn’t stay with me. Break them up somehow and she’d still feel weird about dating Jake’s twin brother. None of it would fucking work the way I needed it to. Even death made this whole thing complicated. The fucker was gone, but she’d either see him in me or feel guilty, which would make no sense, but she’d still feel it. I wouldn’t accept either of those things.

Erase him from her mind. Make her think of no other man but me. That was the long-term goal.

For a while, I thought I’d go about it in a healthy way. As healthy as a man who’s been stalking a woman for twelve years could, at least. That idea had gradually been slipping away and now, staring at Alana with that blonde man at dinner, I chucked that shit in a trash bin and set it on fire.

Who gave a fuck about healthy? When we were happy soon, nothing else would matter- not how we got there or what happened along the way. Nothing but us.

I couldn’t go inside because she’d spot me. Even if she didn’t see me right away, I’d stand out in my casual attire. The place wasn’t upscale, per se, but a hoodie and Vans would be frowned upon.

From my truck, I had a great vantage point. I wanted to hear what they were talking about, but it was inconsequential anyway. This wasn’t going anywhere. It was clear in her demeanor. Either she wasn’t as ready as she hoped or Mr. Not So Discreet Combover wasn’t doing it for her. Both, most likely.

This man wouldn’t know what to do with her. He couldn’t satisfy her. She wasn’t a deviant, but she could be. Our conversation on the phone earlier had been all fun and games on the outside, but I gleaned some truth underneath it. When she’d played along and answered the questions, I couldn’t stop imagining her tied up for me. If she wanted a mask, I’d give her a fucking mask. She’d scream for me just like she said and I wouldn’t need to duct tape her mouth because I had more creative ways to silence her.

Fuck. Only Alana could get my cock hard while I was supposed to be watching her on this date. I was in public, for fuck’s sake, and I was considering rubbing one out. I had to focus on what was going on inside, though.

Even though I wanted to remove that man’s appendages, I wasn’t gonna do that. Like I said, this wasn’t going anywhere. He’d never see her again, which meant he’d be lucky enough to live another day. I wasn’t a murderer anyway.

Well… Yeah, it wasn’t really important right now. The point was that I didn’t go around killing people all willy nilly. They had to earn that shit.

I watched as she stood and headed toward the back. Bathroom, probably. When my phone buzzed, I grinned.

Alana: Question.

Jayce: Answer.

Alana: Don’t be annoying.

How does someone politely end a date before they’ve finished their meal?

Hypothetically.

Jayce: Just leave.

Alana: Seriously.

Jayce: Ok. Tell him he’s ugly.

Ask if his dick is as unpleasant as his personality.

Accidentally pepper spray him.

I waited for her to respond, but she returned to the table looking annoyed. It made me chuckle as I lit a cigarette. She’d gotten herself into this and since there was nothing for me to save her from, I’d just watch it all unravel. Maybe she’d learn not to make plans without getting my advice first.

Alana waved her hand through the air as she chattered. It looked like she was speaking quickly. Her eyes moved to her wine glass just before she bumped it. Accidentally. It spilled all over her, turning her white top red. After jumping to her feet, she said a few more things to the guy, then darted out of the restaurant.

Clever little fox. It wasn’t smooth by any means, but she wasn’t exactly a graceful person. You wouldn’t catch her in heels because she’d fall on her face. The last time she wore a dress, the wind whipped it around and showed everyone her ass in a lacy red thong and she vowed to never betray pants again.

When my phone rang, I almost didn’t answer it just to make her work for it, but I decided to bite.

“Hey, Alana. How’s your date?”

“You’re a douche. I asked you for one thing.”

“Aw. Are you mad at me?”

“Extremely.”

“Yet, you’re calling me, so I assume you made it out alive and you don’t hate me as much as you think you do.”

There was an angry huff followed by the sound of her car door closing. The ignition started and she stayed silent for another moment before she groaned.

“It was a horrible idea.”

“I could’ve told you that,” I pointed out as I maneuvered onto the street.

“Why didn’t you?” She sounded offended, which was laughable.

“You didn’t ask me, did you?”

“Sometimes, these things need to be forced on me.”

Yeah, they most certainly do. All in due time, baby.

“I’ll be at your place in twenty.”

“Really?” Her voice pitched upward, making me smile.

“Wine in hand and listening ear in place. And no, I don’t care that you work tomorrow. Put on a movie for those assbutts and read a book.”

“You are a terrible influence.”

“And you’re the one who’s gonna listen to me.”

She grumbled nonsensically before she ended the call. Such a brat. I needed her smart mouth in front of me so that I could put it to good use.

That gave me an idea.

I pulled into the opposite side of her apartment community and parked beside a quiet building. There were no windows on this side and it was up against a fence that separated it from another complex.

She’d pissed me off today with this whole date stunt, plus seeing her with another man made me feel possessive as fuck.

I grabbed one of the wine bottles and uncorked it. Holding it between my knees, I pulled my cock out. It was easy to get myself in the right headspace when I thought about giving her a part of me. I wanted her to go to sleep full of my cum. Maybe one day I’d train her so that she couldn’t sleep unless she swallowed it.

It had been so long since she’d been with someone. Almost a year now. This would mark her as mine. I was officially claiming her, even though she didn’t know it yet. The moment this touched her lips, I would be the last man she ever had.

Just that thought made my cock throb. I stroked it slowly, pausing at the top to drag my thumb through my precum. I circled the rim of the bottle with it before I grabbed my shaft again. I increased my speed and as more fluid seeped down my length, the sound of it filled my truck.

I imagined it was her mouth on me, those pretty green eyes staring up at me and shining with tears. Her lips were swollen as she sucked needily on my cock, desperate to please me. I would make her feel dirty, like she was just a hole to fuck. She’d be so eager for my praise and eventually, I’d give it to her. When I built her back up after I tore her down, she’d be grateful and she’d fall in love with me more every time. She wouldn’t be able to help herself. I wouldn’t give her a choice anyway.

When I thought about her swallowing my cum, I pumped my hand to the tip, then positioned the bottle so that all of it shot inside. I quickly tucked myself away before I recorked it and tipped it upside down, then righted it. I did that a few times and swirled it around until I was sure that it dispersed. My thumb nail pressed into the top of the cork before I set it back on the seat and drove to Alana’s building. It would be easier now that I’d gotten that out of my system.

Chapter 3

Jayce

Whenever I came to Alana’s place, I didn’t knock. I used my code and went straight to the kitchen. The shower was running in the hallway and I had to force away images of her naked in there, otherwise my efforts in the truck wouldn’t do much good. If I popped an uncontrollable boner here, it would be game over. She’d get weird about it and think I had a crush on her or something.

A crush. That was child’s play.

I took the bottle with the indented cork and opened it. When I poured her a glass, I was glad to see that it didn’t look any different from mine. The ‘don’t be suspicious’ song came into my head and made me chuckle as I took a sip of my wine. Too bad I couldn’t share the joke with her.

The door opened and a moment later, she came around the corner in a pair of sleep shorts and a tank top.

There goes that masturbation session. Fat lot of good it did me.

She grabbed her glass and drained it in one breath. I smiled as I poured her a second.

“The wine before a hello,” I noted, feigning offense.

She wrinkled her nose and offered me a mocking smile. “Hey, Jayce. How’s the job? How’s the wife? Is your nice house treating you well?”

“Still my dream job. The wife is locked in my trunk, as usual. Can’t have her trying to escape while I’m out. And the house is a bunch of wood with a lid on top. Nothing new.”

“Well, at least someone has good things going for them.”

Her despondent expression made me step forward. She wrapped her arms around my middle and let out a sigh against my chest.

“Growth isn’t a straight line,” I said before I inhaled her scent. Peaches. I fucking loved that smell.

“Wavy lines suck and I’d like a refund for this ride.”

“Nope. We’re on it together and if you get off, I’ll be terrified. I’ll probably start screaming and embarrass myself.”

Her laugh made me pull back so that I didn’t miss her smile. After a moment, she collected herself and took a slower drink. Her eyes lit up and she bit down on her lip.

“You really did it.”

I raised a brow. “You didn’t believe me.”

“It’s been seven years, so I was starting to give up hope.”

I’d almost given up hope too, but I refused to disappoint her. It all started one night in college. We’d been determined to find out if expensive wine was actually any better than the cheap shit. It was. After falling in love with a five-hundred-dollar bottle of tempranillo- which we acquired legally at nineteen, of course- we made a stupid bet fueled by inebriation.

She determined that I couldn’t recreate the wine because it was fancy and expensive. I took that personally. So, for seven years I’d been making wine, trying and failing to create that perfect blend so that we didn’t go broke buying our favorite bottle. Now that I had my own miniature vineyard in my backyard, it took up even more of my time, but I was a stubborn fucker. I’d definitely spent more money than we were trying to save by doing this, but it didn’t matter. That look on her face right now was worth it.

“Never give up hope,” I said with a smirk. “Don’t get addicted to the stuff, though. I made ten bottles and it’ll be another year before the grapes are ready again.”

“Boo. I’ll just have to supplement with Barefoot.”

I grimaced. “I wouldn’t be your best friend if I let you drink that watered down trash.”

There was a lingering smile on her face as she shook her head. “This really does taste just like it. We’ll have to buy a bottle to do an official comparison.”

“I have a case on the way to my house.”

“Jayce,” she scolded. “Don’t tell me you spent that much.”

“It’s not that much.”

Her eyes went vacant for a moment as she counted on her fingers. “That’s like… Six thousand dollars!”

It was nearly eight, but she didn’t need the details. I wasn’t a millionaire, but I made good money as an aerospace engineer. Since I lived alone and used an inheritance from my grandfather to put a down payment on my house, I was pretty well off. I worked from home the majority of the time and used my freedom to garden, build shit in my backyard and, well, the obvious- watch Alana.

“They had a really good deal,” I lied, concealing my lips behind the glass as I took a long drink.

“You’re a bastard.”

“Mm. Tell me you have a costume for Halloween.”

“A costume? No, I’m almost thirty. I’m not dressing up.”

I licked my lips and regarded her carefully. She’d put on a sports bra under her tank top, but it didn’t do much to keep my eyes away from her chest. Her nipples were barely visible through the fabric and it was enough to make me step forward. Her eyes tracked me carefully. Whatever was in her gaze wasn’t something she’d let herself feel consciously, but her body knew.

“What time is your appointment with the lawyer tomorrow?”  I asked, stopping just in front of her.

“Three,” she replied a little breathily. She blinked and took a long swig of her wine. When she spoke again, her voice was more normal. “I’m leaving right after my last class.”

“Stop at my house. I’ll drive you there.”

“That’s not necessary.”

“I already told you I’m going with you, Alana. The whole investigation into his death was ridiculous and they shouldn’t have put you through it.”

“I’m sure they’ll look for any reason not to pay out.”

“Well, you’re entitled to the money. My house at two-thirty or I’ll have to hunt you down. And you won’t like that.”

With an eye roll, she gave me a curt nod. I watched her drink more of the wine and felt a surge of possessiveness travel through me. I poured her another glass before I sat on the counter and pulled out my phone.

“I’m ordering Chipotle. You want the same as usual?”

She chewed on her lip, looking apprehensive. “My jeans say I shouldn’t.”

“Alright, so extra chips and queso. Got it.”

Ignoring her glare, I went ahead and made the order. Her body was perfect in every way and if she thought going up a size in pants would make me see her as anything less, she was crazier than I thought.

*****

Alana was tense as she stared at the wall as if it was the most interesting thing she’d seen all year. Inside, she was probably panicking at a million miles per hour. It was possible she had good reason to, but I hadn’t voiced my concerns because that’s all they were. Concerns. Unfounded, but with rightful suspicion.

After Jake died last November, she expected to get his life insurance money. She was the beneficiary, after all. They wanted to ‘look into it more’, though. Apparently, arson raises concerns when it comes to payouts.

Yeah, sure. The cat was out for blood and wanted to help Alana get rid of her fiancé so that she could get a bunch of money.

I had my own worries when they began digging into the incident, but I was confident everything would be just fine. It was a long eleven months, but now it was finally time. She needed this money. She got by on her salary, but it was nowhere near enough considering the cost of living in Albany. Since she wouldn’t let me take care of her, I had to rely on my brother.

It was… not ideal. The bastard wasn’t all he was cracked up to be, but that wasn’t important right now. She was.

“Hey, breathe,” I cooed as I took her hand. I held it in my lap, rubbing tight circles over her skin with my thumb. She visibly relaxed, even though her shoulders were still tight.

I wanted to calm her down, take her mind off of it. I imagined splaying her out on the floor and suffocating myself between her legs. If I gave her the best orgasm of her life, it’d be impossible for her to be this worked up. She wouldn’t even be able to think straight.

Depending how this day went, maybe that was exactly what I’d do.

“There was nothing suspicious about his death,” I reassured her. “They were just being corporate assholes. Everything’s fine.”

She nodded but before she could respond, the door to a conference room opened.

“Miss Monroe,” a woman in a pencil skirt and blazer said, ushering us inside. I slipped my arm around Alana’s shoulders protectively until we took our seats.

My hand twitched with the urge to keep touching her. I wanted to rest it on her thigh or hold onto the back of her neck. Anything to let her know that I was here offering my support. I’d always been here and I always would be. Only death could attempt to tear me away from Alana and even then, I wasn’t sure that hell could restrain me. Not when it came to her. I’d drag her into the void with me if that’s what it took.

Blinking a few times, I watched the woman and a younger man rifle through some papers. He looked like an assistant, youthful and eager to please. From the way her fingers brushed over his as he handed her a file, I was pretty sure they were fucking. It was funny to see the traditional stereotypes reversed- maybe even a little satisfying. A man trying to sleep his way to the top. I loved the dashing of gender assumptions in the modern age.

Do you know who hadn’t loved it? Jaykob, although he’d never outwardly say that. Alana was independent and it was something he’d loved about her early in their relationship. When things got real and they moved in together, started working, paying bills, and doing housework, that was when shit went downhill.

Alana wouldn’t admit it, but things were rocky with them for a while. They were comfortable, though. Why upset that easy balance they’d settled into?

Two reasons. It was fucking boring and it would never feed her soul. I, on the other hand, would never let her go hungry.

God, I was losing my grip on my control. Every day that passed, I wanted her more.

Why shouldn’t I have her? He was fucking gone. After this, there would be nothing else that tied her to him. He could be completely in the past. All I had to do was make sure he stayed there.

“Thank you for coming,” the lawyer began. “I am Isabella and this is my assistant, Henry. As you know, Tidal Insurance conducted an independent investigation into the circumstances of Jaykob Weste’s death to determine if any foul play was involved. In order to pay out his insurance policy, they had to rule out suicide-”

“We know this,” I interrupted. Alana had gone pale and it made me want to throw the uptight bitch out of the window.

“Of course. I’ll get to the point. The investigation has been closed and nothing suspicious was found. They’ve come to the conclusion that you are entitled to your share of the money.”

Alana let out a grateful breath. I was still caught up on part of what Isabella said.

“Her share?” I repeated, raising a brow as I leaned forward.

She shifted uncomfortably. “Well, yes. I thought you were aware of the split.”

“Split,” Alana whispered, shaking her head. “I don’t understand. We were the beneficiaries of each other’s policies. There wasn’t anybody else he’d want to… I don’t… I don’t understand.”

“What did that fucker do?” I growled.

I knew. I hadn’t up until this moment, but I had a bad fucking feeling about it. My fingers gripped the back of Alana’s neck. I no longer cared how she felt about the gesture.

“Mr. Weste divided the share into two percentages. He left you…” She flipped a few pages and dragged her finger down the lines. “Ten percent.”

A small gasp escaped Alana’s lips. She didn’t say anything else and from the look in her eyes, I didn’t think she was capable right now. Maybe she was in shock.

“If he wasn’t already fucking dead,” I hissed.

Isabella looked at me with wide eyes before she shuttered her surprise. She cleared her throat and slipped into her professional image.

“He had a $500,000 policy, which grants you $50,000 in lieu of his death.”

“Who?” Alana asked, barely audible.

“You. That’s the share you’ll receive.”

“Who is the other?”

Isabella blinked a couple of times, then clasped her fingers again. “The remaining ninety percent went to his child.”

“Child? He didn’t have a child.”

“Alana,” I murmured, moving closer to her. My fingers tightened on her nape, which was beading with sweat.

“I’m going to be sick,” she blurted before she rushed out of the room. I followed immediately. It didn’t matter that she went into the women’s restroom. I crouched behind her and held her hair as she retched. All the while, I rubbed her back and cursed Jake’s name.

If I wasn’t glad for his death before, I was now. I’d hoped Alana would never have to find out his big, dirty secret. If she didn’t know, she wouldn’t have to hate him.

I would’ve loved for her to feel such loathing for him, but it didn’t work in my favor. It was only another obstacle I had to navigate in order to make her see me when she looked at my face, the one I shared with my brother- another reminder that made her distance herself from me when I got too close or stared for too long. It was that way when he was alive and it remained the same even as he rotted in the ground- metaphorically speaking.

Chapter 4

Jayce

An occasional whimper left Alana’s throat, even though it had been hours since she’d stopped crying. After we left that office, she was a wreck. I was glad I had the foresight to insist that I drive her to the appointment. I had one of my friends drop off her car at the apartment and once he handed me the keys, I closed the front door.

“Oh, Alana,” I sighed, dropping onto the couch beside her. I pulled her into my side and pressed a kiss to her forehead, then her temple.

She was on her fourth glass of wine and from the way she nearly spilled it for the third time, I thought it might be time to cut her off. In her state, though, maybe she needed to work through it this way for a night. She might scream and cry or she could shut down entirely. Either way, it probably felt better than being sober.

I grabbed her glass and went back to the kitchen to pour her more. “Do you want to talk?”

She shook her head. “I don’t know what to say. It’s just unbelievable. How did I not know?”

“Apparently, he had secrets. I’m sorry.”

“Fifty thousand,” she said, then scoffed. “It helps, but half of it will be gone just paying off my car. Then my student loans. I thought I’d be able to get those out of the way to help with my bills. Maybe go back to school…” She drew in a shuddering breath before she drained her wine.

“We can figure all of that out. I’ll help you.”

When I pulled her against me again, she relaxed, then she became tense suddenly. Her eyes met mine and she scooted a little further away.

My jaw ticked at the gesture. Him. How could I ever create a future with her that was untarnished by him when she saw his face every time she looked at me? The betrayal in her expression right now wasn’t earned by me, yet I suffered for it.

It wasn’t just about my need for her. She’d always shot longing glances my way as well. We circled each other but couldn’t do anything about it, at least in her mind. She overthought everything.

One time, when she was drunk, she admitted that she saw me sometimes when he fucked her. It had taken every ounce of self-control not to claim her as mine right there. But that was the fucking problem. We were interchangeable. Connected. The legacy of one bled into that of the other.

I needed her to want me. No face. No sapphire eyes or dark waves. No Jake, but also no Jayce.

Ideas were forming in my mind, ways to keep these two vastly different people separate in her eyes. Maybe it didn’t start with me. Maybe it started with someone else, a person she didn’t know- the man who had been stalking her for nearly half her life, the nameless entity who lurked in her shadows and knew where she was at every moment.

Me, but not.

I looked at her lips, stained slightly by the wine. My tongue moved with the desire to taste its sweetness on her. She’d drank from the bottle with my cum in it, but it wasn’t enough. I wanted it smeared across her pretty pink mouth, glistening as I painted it there with my cock.

Those lips should be wrapped around my shaft, swollen and needy. While she held my cum in her mouth, I wanted to fill her pussy with it. Then, I’d allow her to swallow, only to collect every drop from between her legs and spit it onto her tongue. I wanted her so addicted that she would beg for it, unable to feel whole until she tasted me every morning.

My quickly spiraling fantasies solidified one thing tonight.

Jake was a tumor wreaking havoc on her brain. It looked like I would have to excise him.

*****

When I left Alana’s apartment, she was mostly passed out already. I’d tucked her safely into bed and locked the door behind me so that she’d be safe. From others.

It was easy for me to get in since I had a code. She didn’t know there was an app, but I cleared the entry anyway. If she ever learned about it and downloaded it, I didn’t need her to see how often I came in here when she wasn’t aware of it. How could I not? She was here every night, alone and vulnerable in her bed.

I never touched her in any meaningful way when I was here. My fingers in her hair or trailing down her back. That was it. My body throbbed with the need for more this time. It was an ache that grew with every step I took toward her bedroom, driven further by her fragile state. If she was in pain, I wanted to either take it away or be the cause of it. Right now, I was leaning toward the former, but the second option burned through my veins every day.

From the moment I saw her, I loved Alana, but that didn’t mean I wanted a life of sweet kisses and unmarked skin. That wasn’t enough for me. Maybe it stemmed from going so long without her, watching my brother have her and underappreciate her. It awoke a hatred in me- toward him and maybe a little toward her because she stayed when things became stagnant. She watched me with longing in her eyes, but she denied herself. It was weak and I knew that she could be strong.

It might be from all of the other sex I had over the years. It angered me every time because it was never with who I wanted. They were surrogates, practice for the moment I’d finally have her, grotesque mockeries of my true desires. Sometimes, I hurt them. It felt fucking good. And with Alana, I wanted that, but I also desired more. Her pain, her pleasure, her acquiescence and complete surrender to my will. To me.

This thing had festered for so long and I could feel that it was about to burst. It was better to get ahead of that, to sate myself gradually so that I didn’t do something insane like declare my undying love for her while we sat on the couch rewatching Schitt’s Creek for the fiftieth time. That would be awkward and I knew what I would see in her eyes if I did that. So, I needed to feed the beast scraps until she was ready.

Stopping in her doorway, I stared at her sleeping form. She’d kicked off the blanket like she always did because she got warm at night. From her position on her stomach, I could see the swell of her ass peeking out of her sleep shorts. The fabric indented her skin and I imagined my fingers pressing into her like that. I could leave bruises there. She might not notice them.

With my mask and hood, only my eyes were visible, but barely. In the darkness, I was all but a ghost. This black fabric covering was the only thing I had, but I’d buy a full mask tomorrow- something that was frightening and would burn my memory into her brain when I allowed her to see me in her bed soon. It would establish an identity, a persona that would exist only with this version of me. It was Halloween, so it should be easy enough to find something good.

If she woke up, she would be groggy from the wine. Worse, probably. She’d been incoherent when I put her to bed. It was possible she wouldn’t remember anything. And if she did? I was simply an intruder who touched her but didn’t hurt her. Maybe a little bit.

That settled it.

Feeling brave, I stepped further into the room. I gently placed my knees on the end of the bed. It dipped slightly and I moved slowly so that it wouldn’t jostle her too much.

I trailed my fingers gently up the backs of her thighs. She let out a heavy breath and squirmed a little before she settled again. She always slept like the dead. One of us had to wake her up for classes back in the day, otherwise she’d be late or miss them entirely. I still texted her in the mornings to make sure she was up for work. With the addition of alcohol, she was a victim to my whims.

The thought of that made something flare in my chest. If anyone ever made it into her apartment while she was in a state like this, she wouldn’t wake up until it was too late. They’d have her at their mercy. Their hands would be on her, their cocks would be inside of her. In my body.

I ran my thumbs under the creases of her ass cheeks where they met her thighs. When I pushed upward, I stared at the round, full globes beneath me. Trying to keep my breaths steady, I dipped under the fabric. With the slightest shift of my hands, my thumbs suddenly touched the warm skin of her vulva. I spread her open and my eyes rolled at the image it conjured in my head.

In one swift motion, I grabbed onto the legs of her shorts and pulled them down. She let out a disgruntled sound and turned her head the other way on her pillow.

She was so fucking easy for me to play with. I wondered how much her subconscious trusted me.

Leaning over her back, I pulled my mask down and positioned my lips at her ear. I sucked on the lobe, then nibbled on it.

“Alana,” I whispered.

“Mm.”

My cock hardened, pressing against her ass. I kept my hips still and focused on grazing her ear with my teeth.

“Alana, baby.”

“What?” she breathed.

“Do you know who you belong to?”

“Mm.”

I smiled before I licked the skin behind her ear. She let out a little whimper and her ass nudged backward, grazing on my cock.

God, she would just give herself to me like this. Would she wake up? If she did, would she stop me?

Best not to find out quite yet.

“You’re mine,” I murmured. “Then, now, and forever. You’ve always known it. Always.”

My lips pressed against the back of her neck. When I trailed them to the side, she stirred again.

“Jayce.”

I froze but didn’t remove my mouth from her skin. Instead, my tongue darted out to taste her, softly enough to make her shiver. Her breaths remained soft and steady, telling me that she was still sleeping.

My mind came up with endless reasons she would have said my name. Was it because of what I was doing or was she dreaming about me? Good dreams, I hoped. They’d fucking better be.

No, I would make sure they were.

Carefully, I turned her onto her back. She brought her knees up and used her feet on the mattress to push further up the bed. It only took a gentle nudge for her legs to fall apart, leaving her completely open to me.

“Fuck,” I choked out a little too loudly. I glanced at her face to confirm she was still dead to the world.

Even in sleep and her drunken state, she could still cum. Did it make me a bad person to do that? Did I care?

No on both counts.

I dropped onto my elbows and moved between her legs. Grabbing onto her ankles, I opened her up a little more. Even though I wanted to bite the soft skin of her inner thigh, I refrained so that I wouldn’t risk waking her. Instead, I trailed my nose from her knee all the way to her slit. My eyes closed as I inhaled her scent.

People sometimes talked about being able to recognize the scent of home. I’d just found that and let me tell you, it’s definitely where my heart is.

Caution had mostly been thrown to the wind at this point, so I ran my tongue along her slit slowly, then nudged through at the top to reach her clit. A soft moan came from her and she turned her head toward the window. When I flattened my tongue, her hands fluttered above the mattress for a second.

“Mm.”

My fingers curled over the tops of her thighs to hold her in place as I used the tip of my tongue to trace around her clit. I was overwhelmed by the scent of her and was desperate for a taste, so I moved lower. When I felt that she was wet for me, I groaned against her, which made her hips jerk. I traveled even further so that I could have every bit of her. I pushed through the resistance to briefly dip my tongue inside of her ass before I returned to her clit.

Raising my gaze to her face, I found her eyes slightly open. There wasn’t recognition there, only confusion. With the hood over my head and everything from my nose down buried in her cunt, it was unlikely she could even see the color of my eyes.

“You have such sweet dreams,” I purred. “Don’t you?”

She made a little sound before her eyes closed and her head fell back. I sucked on her clit and watched her lips part. She was more coherent than before but too out of it to realize that this was real, let alone who I was. Just a sexy dream. A specter in her mind.

I wanted to fill her pussy, but I didn’t want to pull her out of sleep more, so I settled for using my tongue. As I slowly stimulated her clit, I listened to every sharp intake of breath and relished the way her hips moved to seek more.

Just as she was about to tumble over the edge, she let out a long moan. “Jake.”

I stopped immediately. My teeth ground together as rage barreled through me.

She wasn’t going to cum with that name on her lips. If her mind put him in this position, she was only allowed to feel disappointed.

“He’s gone,” I whispered loudly so that she wouldn’t recognize my voice now that she was more awake.

“Gone,” she repeated. “Yeah.”

Sitting up on my knees, I contemplated walking out. I could leave her unsatisfied, but she might still dream about him when I left. No, she needed a piece of me while she slept, even if she didn’t know it.

Pulling out my cock, I stared at her swollen clit while I stroked myself. She’d settled back into unconsciousness, so I gently pushed a finger into her to collect some of her arousal. I spread the wetness over my shaft, then positioned myself lower to slide through her slit. It took effort to keep from slamming into her cunt, but it wasn’t time yet, so I continued my motion, back and forth. Her whimpers started up again, louder than before.

I raised my mask just in case she woke up, then braced one of my hands on the mattress beside her. Holding onto the base of my cock, I rolled my hips, gently thrusting forward, then pulling back and allowing my hand to stroke down to my tip. I repeated the motion, letting my orgasm build slowly. When I moved forward, I rubbed against her clit and brought her closer as well.

She was soaked now and each time I moved back, I slid through her wetness. As I increased my speed, it grew louder. The sound only urged me on. I imagined how slick she’d be when I fucked her and how loud it’d be with her ass slamming into my thighs with every stroke.

“Fuck,” I hissed as my cock swelled with the need to cum. I used my hand to finish myself off, keeping it aimed at her swollen clit. Ropes of cum covered it, seemingly endless, and by the time I was spent, it had begun to drip down to her pussy.

With my thumb, I massaged it into her skin. Her hips jerked with the direct stimulation and it only took a minute for her to gasp and fist the sheets. I watched the way she tightened and spasmed with her orgasm. Soon, she would choke my cock with her pussy.

Leaning down, I lowered my mask enough to dip my tongue inside of her to catch the last convulsions, then dragged it up to collect every drop of my release. When I came up to her face, her eyes were open.

“Who?” she breathed.

With a smirk, I pressed my lips against her parted ones and pushed the cum into her mouth.

“Your savior,” I said before I pulled back.

She blinked, then her eyelids fluttered closed. Even if she remembered anything, it was going to be foggy. She may have reached blackout level with how much wine she knocked back tonight. Hopefully, she remembered bits and pieces. She’d think they were a dream until the next time I visited her.

I smiled at the thought of her being afraid but morbidly curious. She didn’t have any weapons and if I kept her subdued enough to remain confused until she trusted me, she’d become conflicted. It was the first step toward accepting this dark, fucked up situation I was putting her in.

How much would it take to convince her to trust her stalker? I was sure as hell going to find out because it turned out that I enjoyed this. Fuck, I enjoyed it. She was going to be mine, first as this person who lurked in the dark, then as Jayce Weste.

Game, set, match.

Chapter 5

Alana

The shitty thing about teaching high school seniors was that you couldn’t trick them into thinking it was just a movie day. They saw right through me.

“Someone hit it too hard last night!” one of my students, Vik, shouted when I pulled down the screen. The sound was like a sledgehammer to the brain.

I could’ve called out. From the time I woke to the moment I walked into my classroom I’d thought about it at least twenty times. If Jayce hadn’t called me this morning, I wouldn’t have even woken up. He was a lifesaver, although I’d spewed some pretty fucked up insults at him when I answered the phone. He just laughed about it, of course.

That wine he made really went to my head. Like, really went to my head. I didn’t even remember going to sleep, but I assumed Jayce was the one who got me there. Again, he was my fucking savior.

The dreams were fucking strange. I assumed they stemmed from that conversation we had the other day about kidnapping and masks because that was essentially what I’d seen.

A man in a black mask and a hood was in my bed pleasuring me- eating my fucking pussy.

How’s that for unbelievable? If someone actually broke into my home, there’s no way they’d come in, get me off, then leave. I even looked around for anything suspicious before I left because it had felt so real. It was foggy, though. My head had been swimming when I’d looked down and seen him between my legs and I couldn’t even get my eyes to focus all the way. There could’ve been three identical men for all I knew.

It was strange, that was for sure. Sex dreams weren’t a new occurrence for me, but they hadn’t happened since Jake died. I hadn’t thought about sex at all, really. Maybe once or twice, but I didn’t like to think about that because they all happened when I was around Jayce. It was wrong and stupid. I wanted to attribute it to him looking like Jake, but if I was being honest, I’d looked at him even before that. How couldn’t I? He was beautiful.

Yeah, that was weird too. They were identical twins, so I shouldn’t have looked at him and found him beautiful in a different way than his brother, but I did.

I’d been around them long enough to tell the difference. Jayce had a small scar above his lip and his face was more expressive. Oftentimes, he looked stoic and intense, but it was easy to get him to smile and laugh. He loved to tease and have fun. Jake used to, but over the years, we settled into something more reserved and… I didn’t want to say boring, but it sort of was. That was what happened in relationships, though. Things calmed down. You didn’t play around as much as you used to and it got comfortable. There wasn’t anything wrong with that.

Except, apparently there was. At some point, Jake had gone out and had a whole fucking baby. I didn’t know how long ago because the lawyer wouldn’t give me specific information about the other recipients of his life insurance.

Was it in college? Recently? Had he still been seeing this woman up until he died?  I had so many questions I simultaneously did and didn’t want the answers to.

Someone had to know. I was afraid to reach out to his parents because if they didn’t know, I’d be tarnishing their opinion about him. It felt like enough that me and Jayce had to feel that disappointment in him. I didn’t want to. The man was dead, but he’d cheated on me, so I couldn’t really help it.

If I told them, they might even want to meet this kid. After all, it was their grandchild. The thought of that made me nauseous. Did Jayce want that? He had a niece or nephew out there somewhere. He didn’t want his own kids, but he always interacted with his younger cousins when he saw them and after one of them had a baby, he stole the little thing for all of Thanksgiving dinner. He was amazing with children. This was a piece of his brother and there was a chance he’d want to be involved. It was his decision and I couldn’t try to influence what he chose to do.

The bell rang, drawing me out of my musings and triggering a sharp pain behind my eyes.

“Don’t forget we’re starting presentations for your ancient civilizations project on Monday!” I called as everyone darted for the door. When the room was empty, I slumped in my seat with a groan. It was my free period and I seriously considered using it to nap, but if I wanted to avoid doing work tomorrow, I needed to get these things out of the way. I’d meant to grade midterms yesterday after the appointment with the lawyer but for obvious reasons, that didn’t happen.

My phone buzzed and I narrowed my eyes at it before I flipped it over.

Jayce: Boo.

Alana: *gasp* So scary. Maybe you should up your Halloween game.

The door flew open and I screamed. The phone tumbled to the floor and I almost fell out of my seat. A grinning Jayce stood there with two iced coffees. If he wasn’t holding those, I’d probably try to slam his face into the corner of my desk.

“Scary enough for you?” he asked as he set the drink down in front of me.

“That was completely unnecessary.”

“I beg to differ. You look on the verge of death.”

“Yeah, I am, and that little stunt didn’t help.”

He stuck his lower lip out in a pout. “You’re not happy to see me.”

“Not one bit.” Even as I said it, my lips tried to betray my amusement.

“Yeah, you’re ecstatic. You can’t lie to me. I see right through you, Alana.”

His voice took on a deeper tone when he said my name. I studied him, trying to determine if something was up. He looked normal. Black t-shirt, jeans, and stylish boots. His hair was unstyled, which allowed a few wavy black strands to fall over his forehead. He kept it longer than Jake had and I’d always liked it.

“Sugar free,” he said, nodding toward the coffee. “With protein and an extra shot.”

“But I want sugar.”

“That’s the last thing you need after all that wine. Would I ever steer you wrong?”

“Yeah,” I muttered before I took a sip.

With a chuckle, he leaned back against the desk. He was so close that I could smell him. His scent was like tobacco and vanilla, but not in a gross way. It was rugged and inviting, even though those weren’t two words I’d use to describe him in most cases. He was sweet and charismatic, but most people wouldn’t come up to him if they didn’t know him. He looked like he could knock someone out with a single glare.

After high school, Jake didn’t maintain his muscle from when he played sports, but Jayce did. He was bulkier than he had been back then, with biceps that looked too big for any shirt he wore and abs that could give a bitch a concussion. I only knew that because he dragged me to the lake during the warm months. Since I didn’t work in the summer, he made me go often, especially this year. I’d been grateful for it. Staying idle didn’t help with the grief and depression.

“Hey, space cadet,” he said. I looked up to find him smirking. “Where’s your head at?”

“Nowhere,” I lied.

“Mhm. Tell me or I’m taking away your coffee.”

I cradled the cup to my chest. “I just want to know more.”

“What good will it do?”

“It won’t be good, but not knowing is driving me insane.”

He studied me for a long moment. With a sigh, he took me by the arms and pulled me to my feet. When he crushed me to his chest, I almost refused, but it was so comforting that I tucked myself in and took a deep breath.

“I have to go to a job site for a little while, but tonight we’re going out. We’ll get your mind off of this.”

“That won’t fix anything.”

“It doesn’t have to. Are you in a rush to make yourself more upset by finding information?”

“No, but-”

“Then let it go for a bit. You can find out more about her later.”

I nodded reluctantly. Getting drunk sounded like a very bad idea, but I could still go out. We weren’t college students anymore. We knew how to have fun without destroying our livers.

“Wait,” I said, lifting my head. He stared down at me, his expressive blue eyes intense. “Her?”

His lips parted, then he rolled them. “Yeah, whoever this woman is.”

“Is that what you meant?”

“Of course.”

Taking a step back, I studied his face. If I didn’t know him so well, I wouldn’t have seen the way he bit down on his tongue, making his cheek move the slightest amount.

“You’re lying.”

“Alana.” He reached for me, but I shook my head and took another step away from him.

“Jayce, don’t tell me you knew. Don’t fucking tell me that.”

It looked like he was going to lie, then he dropped his head back to look at the ceiling. “What do you want me to say?”

“How about you tell me why you would lie to me too? That’s… Fuck, Jayce!”

“Hey, don’t start yelling,” he said softly. “We can talk about this.”

“Talk about it,” I scoffed. “That’s interesting. Maybe we should have done that months ago. Years? I don’t even know because I have no idea how long this kid has existed.”

“I can tell you if you want to know.”

“Of course I want to fucking know.”

“She’s nine. Her mom is someone from our high school. As far as I know, he barely saw the kid and they were fine with that as long as he paid child support every month.”

My head was spinning worse than it had been all day.

“What the fuck? Why would he hide this from me?”

“Because he was a coward.”

“That makes you a coward too.”

His jaw hardened. When he stepped into me, I backed up against the whiteboard.

“I found out a month before he died and I gave him an ultimatum. He tells you or I do. After the fire, I didn’t know what to do, Alana. It didn’t feel right to add more to your pain.”

“You should have told me.” I shoved on his chest, but he didn’t budge.

“It was his mistake. I’m not going to be demonized for it. All I’ve ever wanted is what’s best for you, Alana.”

“That’s a fucking lie! You didn’t do what’s best for me.”

His eyes darkened as he leaned closer, pinning me with a gaze so intense that I wanted to look away. When I turned, he grabbed onto my jaw and held me in place.

“You’re right. If I did what was best for you, I would’ve ripped you from his arms a decade ago, but what good would it have done? You can’t even fucking look at me without seeing him. You’ll always cast me in his shadow and because of his endless disappointments, I don’t even get the chance to claw my way out.”

Before I could attempt to formulate a response, he released me. The door latched behind him and I was left staring at the place he’d just been. My breaths were rapid, as if I’d just run a mile.

With shaky hands, I picked up the phone on my desk and hit the extension for the principal.

“Principal McKay,” he answered in a chipper voice.

“Hey, this is Miss Monroe. Something has come up and I need to head out early for the day. Do we have a sub who can cover me?”

He hummed for a minute. “How about I have Jane put on a movie for your classes and she’ll pop over to check on them a few times to make sure they’re doing alright?”

“That sounds perfect. I was giving them a movie day anyway.”

“Great! Is everything okay?”

“It will be. Just some family things. You know how it goes.”

“Sure, sure. You let me know if you need anything, alright?”

“Will do. I’ll see you Monday.”

After I hung up, I gathered my things and ran out the door. I didn’t know what I was going to do right now, but I couldn’t be at work. A bottle of wine at home was always an option, but if I kept dealing with my problems with alcohol by myself, I was going to develop a habit.

It was Halloween. I was sure I could find someplace to be that would keep me away from my spiraling thoughts.

Chapter 6

Jayce

My interaction with Alana kept replaying in my mind the entire time I was working. When someone asked me a question, I responded on autopilot. I knew this project better than anybody. I could answer in my sleep. If they could tell that I wasn’t entirely present, they didn’t make it known.

I was pissed at myself but also annoyed with her. Sure, I should’ve told her, but if I’d gone straight to her without giving Jake a chance to come clean, she would’ve been mad about that too. That might’ve been better now that I thought about it, but hindsight is twenty-twenty. At the time, I didn’t want to wedge myself into that problem. As with everything else, it would only make me connected to everything between them. If he told her and their relationship crumbled, I could more easily salvage what Alana and I had.

His death should’ve made things easier. It was supposed to. If I’d known there were going to be so many hiccups, I would’ve confronted him about it again before I carried out my plan with the fire. I thought the whole issue with his daughter would disappear after that and maybe Alana wouldn’t have to know or it would be a long time before she found out, but the fucker had to go and make the kid a beneficiary. He was dead and still getting in my way.

I looked up at the partially constructed rotorcraft with a frown. “You’re behind schedule. Can you tell me why?”

Hector dropped his gaze. “Manpower, mostly. We had a few people quit last month.”

I nodded slowly. “Have you fixed that issue?”

“Yes, we have. I told my team that we would work late tonight and through the weekend in order to catch up.”

“No. You can put in an extra hour or two every day starting next week. Everyone should be home to take their kids out tonight or whatever they want to do. Don’t make them work weekends either. They already spend too much time here.”

He smiled. “You’re too soft, you know. That’s why you couldn’t run this team.”

“I don’t need to run it. That’s your job. But I’ll be damned if my projects are the reason anyone misses out on important time with their families.”

“Big fan of Halloween, eh?”

“You could say that. It’s the only holiday that lets you be anything you want. No job, no responsibilities, and no identity.”

“A winner like you… Aren’t you already who you want to be?”

I laughed lightly at the question. “Sure, but we all need a break from our reality sometimes.”

“Do you have exciting plans tonight?”

“Maybe. I’ll see you in a couple weeks. Make sure you get us caught up.”

He nodded before he joined the rest of his team. I made a beeline for the door, ready to get home. It was a two hour drive from here and it was already three in the afternoon. I had plans to take Alana out, so I called her to make sure she’d be ready. When it went to voicemail, I sent a text instead.

With each passing mile, I glanced at my phone. I knew she was upset, but ignoring me seemed petty. Even with the shock of what she’d learned, I’d hoped she would be able to work through it by the time I got back. If she needed a little extra motivation, I was happy to provide it.

When I was a few miles away, I checked the app on my phone to make sure she was home. I stopped at my house quickly to change into jeans and a black long-sleeved shirt. One of the masks rested on my passenger seat while the other was tucked away in the back. I would need that one later tonight when I paid her a visit.

Out of all the options, the one I’d chosen for my alternate persona was the least cliché and, in my opinion, looked the coolest. Some might opt for a Ghostface or Jason mask, but those were boring and overplayed. The one I got was black with neon blue x’s for the eyes and stitches across the mouth. I found it appealing with just the right amount of creep factor. It was easy to wear with a hood and would be memorable, especially after I visited her at night. Plus, if I didn’t have it lit up, it was mostly black.

My Halloween mask was Jason, though, so I guess I was a cliché for the time being. I thought Alana would find it funny since it was my name. Simple things like that made her laugh sometimes.

I pulled up to her apartment and my brow furrowed. Her car wasn’t in the lot. I checked the app again, confirming that she was here.

That was weird and unnerving.

Taking the steps two at a time, I made it to the second floor quickly. I typed in my code and immediately checked the living room, then the kitchen.

“Alana,” I called as I headed down the hall. “Where you at? If you’re naked, you should tell me if you don’t want me to come in and see your tits.”

With a shrug, I walked into her bedroom but found it empty as well. I spun in a circle, not really sure what to do. Pulling out my phone, I called her again. Vibrating drew me back to the bedroom where I found her phone underneath her pillow. She kept it there when she slept, so maybe she’d taken a nap. But where was she now?

“Fuck. God damnit, Alana.”

Leaving her phone was most likely an accident. If she went somewhere, she’d be back for it. Maybe she just ran to the store. I wondered if I should sit and wait, but then I thought about how she hadn’t answered my calls or texts since I left the job site. That was almost three hours ago now. They showed as unread, which just made my stomach churn even more.

Twirling my keys around my finger, I decided that I couldn’t just wait around. She could have been gone for hours by this point and that didn’t sit well with me. I didn’t know how I was going to find her, but I would.

After this, maybe I’d stick a fucking tracker under her skin. I probably should’ve done it ages ago. Live and learn, I guess.

*****

The school parking lot was packed. There were fucking youths everywhere, buzzing around like bees. They didn’t give two shits about the cars trying to maneuver through and one even flipped me off. Teenagers were the worst. I wasn’t any better at their age, which was why I could say with absolute conviction that everyone should be sent to boarding school from thirteen to eighteen. Give them a place to be their crazy ass selves while the rest of us lived in peace.

It was entirely possible that I was in a bad fucking mood. I was pissed off that I had to go hunting for Alana. Didn’t she know how much I would worry when I couldn’t find her?

“Fuck!” I shouted, slamming my hand against the steering wheel. There wasn’t a single place to park. With a vicious shake of my head, I pulled up to the edge of the coned off area and jumped out of my truck. I wouldn’t be gone long enough for someone to tow it.

I made my way through the rows of stations that were handing out candy. There were some activities throughout the space and a bouncy castle for the younger kids who sounded like they were tearing off each other’s limbs inside. A man in a striped shirt tried to rope me into playing a ring toss game, but when I leveled him with a glare that showcased exactly how I was feeling right now, he quickly gave up.

Finally, I pinpointed someone I could talk to.

“Jane,” I called.

She whirled around with wide eyes, then broke into a grin when she saw me. “Jayce. How nice to see you here.”

“Yeah, it’s great. Where’s Alana?”

“Alana?” she repeated, her brow furrowing.

“Yeah, she came to help, right?”

“No, I haven’t seen her. I was going to remind her during school, but she left early.”

“What? When did she leave?”

She scrunched up her face as she thought about it. Her stupid fucking pigtails bobbed as she waved at a student in the distance. When she refocused on me, I raised my brows expectantly.

“She left before her one o’clock class.”

Shit. That was right after our argument. I should’ve stayed, but I didn’t know she was going to bail on the rest of the school day.

If she wasn’t here, where the fuck could she be?

“Oh, since you’re here, maybe you can-”

Before Jane could finish, I started walking back toward my truck. She was annoying with too much energy and quirkiness. The pigtails and polka dots were too much for me to handle for more than a few minutes. I wondered if she knew how many people couldn’t stand her. She was fucking the principal, though, so apparently, someone liked her.

On my way back, I continued to scan the booths just in case she was here and Jane didn’t know. When I still didn’t find her, I got into my Bronco and rushed out of the lot.

Since I had no other choice, I called my friend, Ben. Friend was an extremely loose term. I was going to owe the guy, but no price was too high to make sure that Alana was safe. He really should do it for free, but everything had a cost to him.

“Jayce,” he greeted in his signature cheerful tone. “Haven’t heard from you in, what, eleven months?”

“Yup. I need a favor.”

“What are you offering and what do you need?”

“A location. If I give you the starting point and a timeframe of when this person left, can you figure out where she is now?”

He chuckled. “Cheating girlfriend?”

“Doesn’t matter. Can you do it?”

“Sure, I can do it. What’s the license plate and car?”

“A 2022 Mustang Mach-E. Dark gray. V12HG7. She left from Fern Drive Apartments somewhere between noon and five.”

“Mmkay. I see what has you fucked up right now. What’s this worth to you, pal?”

I clenched my teeth and let out a long breath through my nose. “Whatever you need, man.”

“A favor, then, like you said. I’ll text you when I’ve got it.”

When I ended the call, I returned to her apartment to check if she was back yet. Her car was still gone and it made my stomach feel acidic. I didn’t know why she’d be gone for so long, especially without her phone. If she intended to be out for a while, she would’ve come back for it. Unless she really didn’t want to be contacted, but that was just dangerous. Too many things could happen to her.

God, she wasn’t thinking straight. Again, I cursed myself for leaving her in that classroom. I should’ve attached myself to her like a leech until I was sure that she was okay.

At the very least, I was putting a tracking device in her car. I was still considering one under her skin, but I’d have to figure out the logistics of that. At the moment, I was having a difficult time coming up with any downsides.

Chapter 7

Alana

When I forgot my phone at home, I thought it would be fine. I was just popping over to the store to get a bottle of vodka. Yeah, that was the mood I found myself in after I took a nap. Wine wouldn’t cut it and I’d get too emotional in the state I was in. Vodka, on the other hand, would either make me forget about my woes or I’d have a burst of anger, in which case I’d probably get through it and move into apathy at a certain point.

I figured Jayce would be blowing me up. We were supposed to go out tonight. He hadn’t been forthcoming about the specifics and right now, I just didn’t care that much. I needed some time to process and I didn’t think that was asking for too much.

What I hadn’t anticipated was running into one of the teachers, Mr. Everhart. We hadn’t interacted very much outside of when our classes were seated next to each other at a few assemblies and the occasional greeting in the hallway. I didn’t know if he’d seen the redness of my eyes or simply recognized me and struck up a conversation, but I found myself glad he did. He invited me to an adult Halloween party, as in above college age, which was a relief. It was in a nice area, in a house I could never afford, and those that were already here seemed nice so far.

I brought my beer to my lips as I took a moment to study him. He was young, probably barely older than me, and I had to admit that he was attractive. His chestnut brown hair was long enough to be styled in a nice quiff and he had just the right amount of stubble to draw my attention to his jaw. It was a pretty nice jaw too. At first, I thought that his eyes were brown, but in the light of the living room, I could see that they were a very dark green. It was an interesting color that I hadn’t seen before.

“What’s the verdict?” he asked.

“What?”

He smiled, then ran his tongue across the bottom of his top teeth. “You were sizing me up. Do you think you could take me in a duel?”

I laughed and covered my mouth. “No, I would lose that immediately. I have no idea how to fight.”

“You can have the first swing. How about that?

“I think that’s gonna land me in trouble with HR, Mike.”

“Oh, ye of little faith. You think I’d turn you in?”

“Maybe. You probably want my classroom. It’s bigger than yours.”

He put his hands up in surrender. “You got me. All of the teachers are envious and we throw darts at a picture of you in the break room.”

Shaking my head, I drained the last of the beer. He immediately took the bottle and grabbed me another one.

“So, are you going to tell me what made you look so despondent while you were browsing the vodka?”

“I was fine.”

He gave me a pointed look. “I teach English, you know. I can recognize an air of melancholy when I see it.”

“Remind me not to hang out with you again.”

“That would work against my interests.”

“Oh, you have interests?” I teased.

“Well, that depends. Are you open to someone having an interest?”

Either this man was pretty smooth or I’d been out of the game for too long. Probably both. As far as dating prospects went, he had a lot going for him. Young, attractive, funny, and he was a teacher, so I liked to think that was a point in his favor for character, but they weren’t all good people.

“I’m not not open to it,” I replied.

“In that case, maybe I can interest you in dinner tomorrow night.”

“Oh, he’s forward. That’s refreshing.”

“And she’s good at changing the subject.”

I bit my lip on a smile. “Okay, how about this? We hang out here where it’s much harder for you to murder me.”

“Okay,” he laughed, gesturing for me to go on.

“And if neither of us are sick of the other by the time we leave, we can have dinner.”

He pretended to consider it for a solid ten seconds. “Challenge accepted. Although, that means I’m going to show you all of the worst parts of me throughout the night so that you can make an informed judgment.”

“I don’t want to see your dick.”

Chewing on his lip, he narrowed his eyes. “That’s what you think I meant by the worst parts of me? You, Alana, have more sass than I expected.”

“Have you changed your mind already?”

“Not a chance. How else am I going to convince you to trade classrooms willingly?”

“Oh, that’s how it is. Alright, Mr. Everhart. This has turned into a challenge.”

When he grabbed my hand and dragged me toward the area where others were dancing, I tried to resist. He raised a taunting brow, so obviously, I couldn’t back down.

*****

Was I drunk? A little bit. Maybe a lot. It was hard to tell after a while, when you were surrounded by others who felt the same way and there were things going on in every direction. I couldn’t take a moment to evaluate how I felt, but I was having a good time, so I didn’t care all that much.

Adult parties weren’t all that different from college ones, surprisingly. Once everyone started getting tipsy, the music got louder and the hard liquor was brought out.

“Do you want a shot?” I called as I poured myself one.

Mike shook his head. “I have to drive in a little bit. My babysitter can’t stay all night.”

“Oh, shit. You have a kid?”

“Yeah. A daughter.”

“That’s, uh, cool. Are you divorced, then?”

He rolled his lips a few times, then looked at me again. “No. She died, actually. Two years ago.”

“I’m so sorry.”

I put a hand on his arm and squeezed it. Being on this side of things was unfamiliar to me, but I knew from experience that the more you said about it, the more awkward things felt for the other person. At least, that’s how it was for me.

“My fiancé died almost a year ago.”

“I heard about it. Actually, I thought about talking to you a few times, but I know how overwhelming it can be. Condolences, condolences, condolences.”

“I’m surprised you said that three times without stumbling.”

He chuckled. “We should get some air.”

I nodded and followed him out the front door. On the porch, it was significantly quieter. As I adjusted to it, I started to recognize that I was pretty damn tipsy. After the morose turn of conversation, I wasn’t sure what to do, so I just leaned back against the railing.

Mike watched me curiously as if he was looking for something. Maybe he was perceiving something. Neither of those were ideal, but I guess it was part of pursuing someone. It had been so long since I got to know someone. Did it still work the same? I didn’t know if it was one of those social things that changed with the times. Online dating was one example. The idea of that made me wonder if being alone forever wasn’t as bad as it sounded.

When he stepped closer, I sucked in a breath. There was hardly any space between us and I felt simultaneously excited and terrified. There was a little bit of guilt there too, which was my biggest deterrent. Jake was dead but somehow, it still felt like I was doing something wrong.

“How about that dinner tomorrow?” he asked. His voice was soft and deep. It made my brain feel a little scrambled.

“I guess I can stomach being around you again.”

“This might make me sound like an asshole, but I just want to throw it out there. If you want to come to my place tonight, I guess I could stomach that.”

A nervous laugh left me. “That might be taking it further than I can handle right now.”

“Then, dinner tomorrow. Nothing more than that, even if you try to jump my bones.”

“I’d like that.”

“One more thing, though.”

His lips came down on mine, startling me. I was immediately conflicted. Part of me wanted to kiss him because he was a nice guy and I was attracted to him, but it still didn’t feel right. It was too soon.

I was about to pull away, but he did first. It was so abrupt, I stumbled. When I opened my eyes, I saw someone wearing a Jason mask and a dark shirt with the sleeves rolled to his elbows. He slammed his fist into Mike’s face, knocking him to the ground.

“What the fuck?” I shouted. When I tried to crouch beside him, the other man grabbed me by the arm. I screamed and tried to get out of his grip.

“Alana,” he said in a familiar voice. He raised the mask and my mouth fell open.

Mike scrambled backward before he struggled to his feet. “Oh my god.”

“What the hell are you doing?” I demanded.

Jayce raised a brow but otherwise remained expressionless. He maintained his grip on my arm and even when I tried to shrug him off, he held on.

“Well, are you going to answer me?”

“We had plans,” he replied simply.

“Then I found out you betrayed me.”

He scoffed. “I didn’t betray you.”

“You sort of did!”

“It’s not my job to relay all of my brother’s sins, Alana!”

“Oh, are there more?” I snapped.

“I’m sure I can think of a dozen, but they don’t fucking matter because he’s dead. What good does it do to cause you pain?”

This time when I shook him off, he released me. I walked over to Mike and looked at the blood on his lip.

“I’m so sorry,” I rushed out.

“No, uh, it’s fine. Who is this?”

“This is my friend, Jayce. Apparently, he thought you were going to hurt me or something.”

“Or something,” Jayce repeated dryly.

“Right,” Mike drawled. “I have to go relieve the babysitter.”

“Yeah, of course. You should do that.”

He hesitated, his eyes moving to Jayce briefly. “Seven tomorrow?”

I smiled a little and nodded. “That’s perfect.”

I watched him until he got into his car, then I turned on Jayce. “You can’t go around punching people.”

“You’re at a party kissing a random guy. What was I supposed to think?”

“That I’m an adult and I can kiss whoever I want.”

“Maybe we could’ve avoided this entire situation if you told me where you were going.”

“I went to the store and forgot my phone, then I ran into Mike.”

He rubbed his jaw as he nodded. “Alright. Got it. Mike, who teaches at your school and you barely know, was a better alternative to spending time with me like we planned.”

“How do you know who he is?”

“I’ve seen him when I come by.”

With a sigh, I leaned back against the house. “I was hurt.”

He settled beside me, then took my hand and dragged us down to a sitting position. I dropped my head against his shoulder, letting him pull me into his side.

“There wasn’t a perfect way to deal with it,” he said. “I did my best to protect you. I always have.”

“I know,” I whispered.

Jayce flipped onto his knees in front of me and before I could ask what he was doing, he took my face in his hands. His blue eyes were bright in the dim light and suddenly, everything seemed to disappear. My heart raced as I stared back at him, waiting for something.

What was I waiting for?

From one moment to the next, Jake came to my mind. And once he was there, that’s who I saw in front of me. I knew it wasn’t him, but it was hard to make that distinction, even when I looked at the scar above Jayce’s lip and the difference in the way he held himself.

“You see him.”

My eyes burned as I nodded. He let out a breath and kissed my forehead, then got to his feet. I took his outstretched hand, letting him pull me up.

“Let’s get out of here,” he said.

“I can drive.”

“Fuck no, you can’t. You smell like a distillery.”

He dragged me to his Bronco, then helped me into the seat, even though I didn’t need it. While he walked around to the driver’s side, I focused on my breathing.

Why did they have to be identical? Jake was gone, but he still remained every time I looked at his brother. It gave the term dead ringer a more sinister meaning.

If they weren’t twins, maybe I could imagine Jayce as something more than my best friend, but we both knew it wasn’t possible. He saw the moment my mind made the switch. I knew he returned my feelings, but it was probably just as fucked up in his head. I was his brother’s fiancé. We both had to move on and I think he agreed, especially after tonight.

I knew Jayce well enough to believe that we could stay best friends. He wouldn’t push me to do anything I wasn’t comfortable with.

When he climbed into his seat, he flashed me a heart-stopping smile. I returned it, unable to hold back if I tried.

Chapter 8

Jayce

Alana was sitting cross-legged in the passenger seat and every time I looked over, she was deep in thought. She seemed fine now. I wished I felt the same way.

I was fucking livid. That guy, Mike, needed a few more hits to the skull. I wanted to shatter the bones in his face and hit him hard enough to pop the blood vessels in his eyes. Maybe I could make him go blind. Then he wouldn’t be able to look at Alana again.

His lips had been on hers. I swear to god, I saw red. Not only did I want to kill that motherfucker right there on that porch, but I wanted to claim Alana in front of him. I thought about bending her over the railing and stuffing her full of my cock. He couldn’t have stopped me and neither could she. Once I was inside of her, she wouldn’t even try.

But, again, there would eventually come a moment when she saw Jake, just like she did when I knelt in front of her. Every time, it pissed me the fuck off. There was a second when I thought I might be able to kiss her and I wouldn’t have to worry about all of the other shit anymore, but I saw the change in her eyes. So, we still had a game to play.

Operation Kill Jake 2.0. His very existence needed to be erased so that I could live my happily ever after with Alana, which meant I was going to be doing things I’d never done. Many would call me a monster for them but if it worked out in the end, what the fuck did it matter if I threw my morals away? If vile acts were going to be committed, they should be done in the name of love.

I pulled into a parking lot and shut off the truck. Alana looked at me curiously, but I just winked and headed around to her side. She looked annoyed when I took her hand to help her down and it was an effort not to roll my eyes. My brother failed this woman in so many ways. Who had someone this fucking perfect and didn’t treat her like she was their top priority?

Settling my mask over my face, I jerked my chin and started walking. After we made it a few blocks, the music around us got louder and the street became brighter. We turned the corner and I saw her eyes go wide.

“I haven’t been to the parade in years,” she shouted over the music.

“I know.”

We’d missed half of it, but there were still quite a few floats. The one closest to us was full of zombies acting like they were eating some humans. One of them jumped down and pretended to go for someone in the crowd, which drew a few screams and laughs.

Above us, there were some giant balloons of popular Halloween icons. There was a bat, a Chucky doll, Pennywise, a pumpkin, spiders, and skulls. The way they loomed in the sky helped set the mood.

After the zombie display passed, I grabbed Alana’s hand and pulled her closer. There was a gap in the crowd, which allowed us to make it right up to the gate. A woman selling black roses came up to us and I bought one, then passed it to Alana. She grinned as she gently stroked one of the silky petals.

“Oh, that’s our cheer team,” she announced, pointing at an oncoming float. The girls were dressed as broken dolls and performed a dance that made it seem like their arms hung limply.

“Weren’t you a cheerleader?”

She snorted a laugh. “For one season. I was always two steps behind everyone else. The coach very politely suggested I choose another extracurricular activity.”

“I can’t see you as a cheerleader anyway.”

“It was only because Jake was on the football team. Both of you, actually.”

“You did just fine watching from the stands.”

I looked over at her, taking in the tight set to her lips. After a moment, she cleared the expression.

“Vicky Hart always flirted with Jake. One time, she made a joke that a football player should be with a cheerleader. She was talking to her friends, but she looked directly at me when she said it. I thought he would like it if I was on the team.”

It was an effort not to scowl. “Vicky flirted with everyone,” I said dismissively.

“Did you ever fuck her?”

At that, I laughed. “No. I left that to others.”

“I know you slept around in high school. If you weren’t into cheerleaders, who was your type?”

I eyed her for a moment, letting my gaze travel down her body until she shifted to her other foot. “Swimmers were always fun. They can hold their breath for a while.”

She burst into laughter, drawing a few stares. “Maybe I should’ve experimented more when I was younger.”

“You’re still young.”

“Yeah, but it feels different now. I was fourteen when Jake and I got together. He’s the only one I’ve… Fuck, that’s sad.”

“Does it matter? Sex is sex, regardless of how many people you’ve tried it with. It’s not like you were being a prude or are inexperienced.”

“I guess you have a point. Does that mean I get to enter my hoe phase later in life?”

Again, I felt a surge of possessiveness. “Maybe you should wait and see what happens. Don’t rush.”

She made a noncommittal sound. I stole a glance at her while she watched the parade. If anyone so much as touched her, they’d get worse than what I did to Mike. Speaking of that fucker, I had to figure out what they were supposed to be doing at seven tomorrow. Then, I had to convince her to back out. Otherwise, this angry thing inside of me was going to rise to the surface and demand blood.

*****

Alana’s light shut off a few minutes ago, which I knew meant that she was lying in bed with her phone. I navigated to my app that was connected to it and saw that she was reading. Horror. How fitting.

The good thing about having her phone earlier was that it gave me a chance to program a new number into it. I’d gone back and forth on what to set the name as. Eventually, I decided on Erebus, the personification of darkness in mythology. She was a history teacher and her favorite subject was ancient civilizations, particularly religion and culture. She would recognize the name and it would unnerve her.

Erebus: Good book?

The message showed as read immediately. I wished I could see her face. The fear on it must’ve been beautiful. Finally, after ten minutes, my phone buzzed.

Alana: Who is this?

Erebus: Let’s play a game. You guess and if you get it right, I’ll reward you.

Alana: Seriously, who is this?

Erebus: Come on. You’re a clever fox.

While I waited, I leaned against her car. Mine was parked a few blocks away so that she wouldn’t spot it. I was donning my new mask with the neon lights turned on. It was Halloween, so if anyone saw me, it shouldn’t look too strange, but I didn’t really care either way.

Erebus: You shouldn’t read on your phone. It’s bad for your eyes.

And they’re such pretty eyes.

After a few minutes, she appeared in the window, just as I expected she would. She scanned the parking lot, then her gaze landed on me. Immediately, she took a small step back. I cocked my head, never looking away from her.

Through the window, I could see the tops of her thighs where the shorts ended. She had on a thin tank top that would do nothing to conceal her breasts if I was close enough. I wanted to take her nipple between my teeth through the shirt. If I bit down on one, she’d make such a beautiful sound.

Her lips parted and her chest expanded with her heavy breaths. She was no doubt wondering if I was the one who’d texted her. It could be a coincidence. There were bound to be people in masks still meandering about tonight.

I glanced down at my phone to type out a message.

Erebus: If you keep staring at me like that, I’m going to get self-conscious.

She checked her phone, then closed the curtains. I could still see her silhouette but after a minute, she rushed away from the window.

Well, we’d officially been introduced. I guess it was about time after twelve years doing this exact thing in the shadows. It was funny when I thought about it. Plenty of people had been stalked in their life, but there must be more who never found out that they were on someone’s radar. How many went to sleep with eyes on them or got into their car completely unaware that someone tracked their every step? Right now, anyone in existence could have their own shadow and they may never know.

I pulled a window marker out of my pocket and started to write on the driver’s side window of her car. When I finished, I stared at the red letters for a moment. I glanced up at her room one more time before I began walking down the street.

My sweet, beautiful Alana. I was going to turn her mind upside down until all that remained inside were the things I wanted her to keep.

Chapter 9

Alana

Last night, I barely slept. On top of my racing thoughts about Jake, his secret love child, and my upcoming date with Mike, I had a new issue to deal with. I didn’t even know what it was exactly or what it meant. It couldn’t be good, though.

Erebus. The contact was in my phone, but I hadn’t put it there. It was impossible to know if it had been recently added or had been there for a while. I looked at the number and I didn’t recognize it. When I typed it into Google, it didn’t come up with anything. If it was just the messages, I might be able to brush it off as a prank. My first thought was that Jayce was messing with me. Then, I saw the man outside.

I was shaken. He’d been wearing a neon mask with Xs for eyes and a mouth that looked stitched. And he was leaning against my car. Maybe that was a coincidence but given everything else, I didn’t think so.

Who the hell was it? I didn’t even socialize for the most part. It could still be a prank. Fuck, he was going to think I was insane if I was wrong, but I had to try.

Alana: You don’t happen to own a mask, do you?

Jayce: You know I do. Why?

Alana: Is it neon?

The phone rang and I groaned but answered it. “Hey.”

“What’s going on?”

“I… It’s hard to explain.”

“Alana, you know if you don’t tell me, I’ll just come to your place.”

“Jesus. Okay, so I got some weird texts last night.”

“Weird texts?” he repeated. “Tell me what they said.”

“Uh, someone named Erebus was asking me about my book. When I looked outside, there was a guy in a neon mask. He was just staring at me, then he texted me again. It was the same person.”

There were a few beats of silence. “Please tell me you’re playing a prank on me right now.”

“I wish I was. I thought maybe it was you fucking with me.”

“Of course it wasn’t me. I’m coming over.”

“No,” I said quickly. “That’s not necessary. It’s probably just someone I know trying to mess with me.”

“Who would do that? Alana, this doesn’t sound safe. You should call the police.”

“There’s nothing to report at this point. If I see him again, I might.”

“I have a bad feeling about this. You’re keeping everything locked up, right? The front and patio doors, all of the windows. Everything.”

With a sigh, I plopped onto my bed. “I’m not an idiot. Look, I’m sure it’s nothing.”

“Okay.”

He sounded hesitant and I could just imagine him jumping in his truck to race over here.

“Maybe you need cameras,” he went on.

“I don’t need cameras. Just relax, okay? I’ll tell you if anything else happens.”

“Good. Please be careful.”

“Always. I love you.”

“I love you too, Alana.”

After I ended the call, I stared up at the ceiling and focused on my breathing. My heart rate was steady and I didn’t feel as anxious as before. I was still more than a little unnerved by the whole thing, but I wasn’t sure what to do about it right now. I lived in an apartment and there were people all around me. If anything happened, someone would hear me scream, which would’ve been a comfort if I thought anyone would actually try to do something about it. Studies showed that a lot of people wouldn’t call the cops if they heard or saw something suspicious.

Maybe I should’ve made friends with my neighbors over the past six months. They might be more willing to be helpful if they knew who I was. How did one introduce themselves to neighbors? In movies, they baked cookies and brought them by. If someone did that, I would immediately throw them away because they might be poisoned. I also didn’t trust anything cooked by someone I didn’t know. There was no telling what the state of their kitchen- or their body- was. For all I knew, they could be like that woman who made sourdough using her vaginal yeast infection.

Now that I’d triggered a gag first thing in the morning, I got to my feet to make a very strong pot of coffee. Once again, I hadn’t worked on grading midterms yesterday, which meant I couldn’t spend the day sleeping. I was far from in the mood for it, but I didn’t really have a choice. Next week, my students would be doing their presentations, which meant I’d have to focus on that. These tests had to get finished this weekend. No exceptions.

Giant coffee cup in hand, I settled on the couch with a stack of paper in front of me. Five classes times twenty five students in each one gave me one hundred and twenty five tests to grade. That wasn’t horrible, except that each one had a hundred questions on it. That left me with twelve and a half thousand places to put a check or an x.

Fuck me. The school needed to give me a T.A., but that would require a budget, which we never had. The teachers had to pay for most of our supplies. Parents that were able and willing to buy the things on the provided list at the beginning of the year helped a lot, but we were still left with a lot to cover ourselves.

Public school was laughable sometimes.

After I turned on some music, I got to work. It didn’t take long for me to get into the groove of things. My head bobbed to the beat and I found myself singing badly along with the lyrics. I’d made it through about half of the stack when my neck felt prickly. I looked up, then turned to the living room window, but there was nothing out of the ordinary.

Shaking my head, I got to my feet and headed into the kitchen for more coffee. Once my cup was full, I started back toward the living room but came to an abrupt halt when there was movement outside the sliding glass door in the dining room.

My heart hammered in my chest. The caffeine probably didn’t help the anxiety I felt right now, but god could pry it out of my hands in hell. I took a cautious step forward and when I didn’t see anything, I moved closer.

The deck was empty, aside from my little barbecue and the chest with my random gardening supplies that I couldn’t use here. Blowing out a breath, I brought the cup to my lips.

Neon blue appeared at the window and I screamed. The cup fell to the floor, shattering on impact. I was frozen with my eyes locked on that mask. It was at the top of the window and it was… upside down. Was this fucker on the roof?

We stayed like that, as if in a stare off, for an indeterminable amount of time. I wanted to run, but I didn’t know where I’d go. I was afraid that if I left the door, he’d break in. If I ran through the front door, I could be at his mercy since he was prowling around on top of the building like a cat.

My chest ached with how hard my heart was pumping. I swallowed and took a step back, then nearly dropped to my knees when I stepped on a piece of ceramic. When I looked down, I found that it was all around me, leaving me in a minefield of sorts.

Looking back up, I felt something lodge in my throat. He was gone. I didn’t know if that made me feel better or worse.

I rushed to the closet and pulled out a broom. After unscrewing the brush, I returned to the back door and wedged the stick into the track so that the door couldn’t open. He’d have to break the glass if he wanted to get inside. I didn’t think the lock on the front door could be fucked with since it was coded. It did have an emergency spot for a key, but you couldn’t slide that part open if you didn’t have the fob.

It was safe here. He couldn’t get in.

Even though I wouldn’t be able to focus now, I moved back to the couch. I still felt like I was being watched, so I craned my neck to peer out the front window.

Oh, god. He was standing by my car again. His hands were in his pockets and he was just staring up at me, directly into this window as if he knew where I’d be.

Who the hell was he and why had he set his sights on me?

Last night was the first time I’d seen him. I didn’t know who would be interested in scaring me. Or was he stalking me?

No, no, no. I hadn’t earned a stalker. Nobody really earned a stalker but I figured in most cases, you had to catch their attention somehow, even if it was just a conversation that got them interested in you. I didn’t talk to anybody.

Maybe he’d seen me at the party last night. I did have passing conversations with a few people but nobody who seemed weird enough to do this. I guess that was sort of the thing, right? A serial killer’s neighbors and coworkers often said they were the most normal person. Spoiler alert: they weren’t fucking normal.

Taking out my phone, I kept my eyes on him while I hit redial. I brought it to my ear and the man cocked his head.

“Hey,” Jayce answered.

“He’s back,” I whispered. It was pointless, but it felt right.

“Who? The guy in the mask?”

“Yeah. He’s outside right now.”

“What’s he doing?” he asked, sounding a little panicked.

“Just standing there. Watching me. He was on my balcony, Jayce. On the roof.”

“The roof? Hold on. Don’t fucking move. I’m coming over.”

“Hurry please. I’m so scared.”

“Stay on the phone, okay?”

The man looked down and I saw him doing something on his phone. A moment later, mine buzzed.

Erebus: Your boyfriend can’t help you.

I’m a shadow, Alana. I can make him vanish into the darkness too if you want. Think about it. He and his brother could be twin shadows.

“Alana?”

“I’m here. Maybe… Maybe you shouldn’t come.”

“Fuck that. Why would you say that?”

“What if he hurts you?” My voice cracked and my eyes welled with tears that I wouldn’t let fall.

“I’m worried about you. Just stay put. I’ll be there soon.”

“Shit. He’s leaving.”

The man turned and slowly began to walk toward the street. I thought about going outside to see which direction he went, but that would be really stupid. It felt like I should be doing something, but my fight or flight instincts were apparently broken. I went into fainting goat mode.

“Five minutes,” Jayce said. “I’m almost there.”

“He’s gone.”

“I’ll fucking find him. Don’t you dare move, okay?”

“Okay.”

I probably couldn’t move even if I wanted to.

Chapter 10

Jayce

When I made it around the corner, I carefully removed the mask so that Alana wouldn’t hear anything suspicious. I readjusted my ear buds before I muted the call so that she wouldn’t notice me start the car. She was too absorbed in what was going on to realize I hadn’t done it earlier. She never took her eyes off of me while I was outside. After I changed my clothes, I started driving.

I’d have to check out her foot when I got there. If I’d known she would be carrying coffee, I wouldn’t have spooked her that bad. Her scream had chilled me, though- in the best way. It sent electricity racing down my spine and I had to hold myself back from going inside. I could imagine the panic in her eyes as she tried to escape.

This thing couldn’t be rushed. It all rode on a gradual progression. It was entirely possible it wouldn’t play out how I intended at all, but that was the case with everything in life. I was going to wake her up and make her discover parts of herself that she didn’t know existed. She’d fall in love with the version of me that was unobstructed by our past, then I’d merge them into one person. It would overshadow everything else and we could finally be free.

While I drove the few blocks to her apartment, I thought back on an interaction I had with my brother. It was a few years ago when he’d shown up at my place drunk as fuck and ranting about the issues they were having. He wasn’t adventurous or open to new things when it came to sex. Alana had brought up something that freaked him out and for some reason, he thought I would validate him.

I never lied to my brother, except when it came to my feelings about Alana. He never explicitly asked, so I didn’t really have to worry about it. So, when he told me that Alana brought up CNC and he voiced his disgust, I didn’t condemn the idea. He was pissed about that, but I didn’t care.

As far as I knew, they never actually tried it, but it became a part of my fantasies about her. It was enough to tell me that she had desires that were previously unfulfilled. I was happy to grant her every wish and then some. Even if I took her body without her consent, I would make her enjoy it, whether she admitted it or not. I’d planned this out extensively and I knew how far I was going to push her. It was directly off the fucking deep end.

I whipped into a parking spot and ended the call before I sprinted up the stairs. She opened the door and immediately fell into my arms. I lifted her until we got to the couch, then sat down and pulled her against my chest.

“Hey,” I cooed. “It’s okay, Alana. Are you alright?”

She shook her head. “I’m so freaking scared.”

“I know.”

“He just… He just popped out of nowhere. It was so creepy. One second there was nothing there, then he hung his head in front of the door. Who the hell is this messed up?”

“I don’t know, but I’m gonna figure out who he is. Do you want to come stay with me?”

“No, I want to be here. I mean, he can’t get in, right?”

“Not unless he breaks something. Let’s get you an alarm. That way, if any point of entry opens, it’ll notify us.”

“Fine, but I don’t want cameras.”

“Why not?”

“Maybe he could find a way to tap into them and watch me. That creeps me out more.”

I laughed as I stroked down her back. “I doubt it’s that simple, but okay. No cameras. If things get worse, though, I’m not giving you a choice.”

“Worse,” she repeated in a whisper.

“It won’t. Everyone is fallible. You should make a police report.”

“Is a guy staring at my window enough to make a report? He was on the roof, but not my balcony, so technically he hasn’t been on my property.”

“I don’t know what the requirements are, but it doesn’t hurt to try.”

She let out a heavy breath. It drifted across my skin, making me shiver. Pushing her back, I looked down at her foot.

“Did you hurt yourself?”

“Oh, it’s just from my coffee cup.”

I took her ankle and brought it to my lap. The cut wasn’t too bad, but it was still bleeding a little. It needed to be cleaned and bandaged. I’d have to be more careful if I was going to pop in at random times. It’d be easier if she agreed to the cameras, but I was sure she’d be begging for them soon enough. And I, best friend that I was, would make sure to monitor them for her so that I could stay abreast of any suspicious activity.

We wouldn’t want her to be at the mercy of a man harboring a long-standing obsession. That shit was dangerous.

*****

I told her not to go. Damn near begged her, actually. Yet, here she was, sitting at a table in a mid-level restaurant with the bastard I should’ve skinned alive for kissing her.

It was going better than the last date. She’d laughed a few times and was talking more. They were in the middle of their meal and she hadn’t excused herself to send me a desperate text message.

It wasn’t going to end well. Apparently, I had to teach Alana hard lessons. We’d start out on the softer side, though.

Erebus: I don’t appreciate those who try to steal from me.

She flipped her phone over and her lips parted. Her eyes scanned the windows, searching for some glimpse of me, but it was dark where I stood and the lights on my mask were off. After a moment, she returned her attention to Mike and smiled. They continued their conversation as if everything was fine.

Erebus: How do you feel about orphans?

After she looked at the message, she put her phone away. That was something she’d regret. Would I kill the guy? Not if I didn’t have to. Exactly what it would take for me to pull the trigger was still up for debate. The lines I was willing to cross had been shifting lately, so I was interested in that answer too.

I’d been stalking this woman since we were teenagers, so I clearly had a loose sense of morality from the get-go. I had no issue with watching her in her most intimate moments. Never with my brother, only when she was by herself.

The first time I killed for her was in college. There was a guy in her art history class who kept asking her out. It got to the point where she didn’t want to go anymore because it was daily. He was a rich prick who enjoyed doing blow, which made it easy. All I had to do was sneak into his dorm and replace his stash with coke mixed with a shit load of fentanyl. It ended up killing him and one of his friends. Another nearly died. I bet he never touched the shit again, so maybe I did him a favor. There were a couple others along the way.

When she was nearly failing one of her classes, I replaced her final paper with one that I wrote, which got her an A on it, allowing her to barely pass the class. Nobody could say I wasn’t devoted to this woman.

What had Jaykob ever done for her? In high school, he was good, sure, but I had my suspicions about the things he got up to. Vicky didn’t continue flirting with him simply because he was on the football team. I was on the team and made it clear she needed to fuck off, so she did. No, he flirted back. Maybe more, but I never caught him.

Years of all these missteps added up and after I found out about his daughter, I was done. I gave him a chance, but a month later he still hadn’t fessed up, so I decided that enough was enough. He needed to be out of her life for good. So, I made sure that he was.

Now, I had a fucking single dad to deal with. Worse, she worked with him, so there wasn’t much I could do about her talking to him five days a week.

Taking him away from his kid was toeing a line I wasn’t sure I wanted to cross. She’d forgive me for the others when she found out about them. I wasn’t going to keep secrets from her once we were together. This one, though, might be too much for her.

I could scare him off. Erebus might come in handy. Getting someone else involved posed a risk, though. Dealing with the police if Alana made a case was easy enough. There wasn’t going to be any proof and they probably wouldn’t put much effort into it. If there was a second person to corroborate the story, it got more complicated.

After I turned on my mask, I watched her and waited. Let’s see how clever she was when she found herself cornered.

Chapter 11

Alana

Despite feeling awkward about that kiss yesterday, I was having a really good time with Mike. He was charismatic and knew how to hold a conversation, which was rarer than it should have been. I didn’t hang around people very often but when I did, I could talk and be likable. He actually made it pretty easy and I didn’t feel like I was faking it, which was a relief after that dreadful date with Preston.

The creep who sent me some unnerving texts could fuck right off. I should probably just block him.

“Did you always want to be a teacher?” I asked before I took a drink of my wine.

“Yes and no. It was always an option. Plan B, if you will.”

“Oh, this sounds like a story.”

He laughed and shrugged nonchalantly. “I’ve always wanted to write, but I needed a fallback. Starving author didn’t appeal to me, so I got my degree and teaching certificate.”

“Do you have a finished manuscript?”

“Yeah, I have a couple, actually. I’ve sent them to various publishers, but it’s a hard world to get into.”

“You could always self publish,” I pointed out.

“That’s a whole different beast. On my own, I don’t really have the time to do what it would take. You either need money to delegate all of the essential tasks or you have to somehow become an artist, a marketer, a social media name, an editor, and whatever else. I thought about it before, but my daughter takes up a lot of my time.”

“Mm. Single dad life.”

He grunted his agreement and started eating his food again. As I brought a bite to my mouth, I looked toward the window. The fork fell from my hand, making a sharp noise when it hit the plate.

“Alana?”

I blinked a few times, but it didn’t do any good. This wasn’t my imagination. Across the street, standing under a tree in the park, were two neon blue Xs and a stitched mouth. It was dark in that area, so I couldn’t see anything else except for those three glowing pieces of his mask. And, as expected, he simply stared at me.

How did he know where I was? Suddenly, his texts became that much more sinister. I brushed them off before, unsure what he was going on about. I hadn’t stolen anything from him. Clearly, he was just insane and rambling.

But no. It was about the date. Orphans… That had to be a threat toward Mike. Was this guy crazy enough to actually kill him? And how the hell did he know anything about him? Either he knew him or he’d overheard our conversation at the party. Or he somehow had a way to learn everything about someone in a matter of minutes.

Maybe I should assume that he knew everything.

Fuck, I shouldn’t have come on this date. The bastard wrote ‘Nyx’ on my driver’s side window, but I hadn’t even taken that seriously. He was taunting me, obviously. Watching me and writing on my car might be the least of my concerns.

“Alana.”

I looked at Mike’s worried expression. My mind conjured an image of him with a bloody hole in the middle of his forehead. All because of me.

“Are you okay?” he asked, reaching over to take my hand. I pulled it back quickly and dropped it into my lap. It was hard to ignore the flash of hurt in his eyes.

“I’m actually not feeling great.”

“Oh. Alright. Do you need to leave?”

“Yeah, I think I do.” I grabbed my coat and threw it over my forearm quickly. “I’m really sorry, Mike. I swear this isn’t me blowing you off or anything.”

“That’s encouraging,” he said with a light laugh. He got to his feet and pulled me into a hug, which just ignited more panic.

When my gaze traveled over his shoulder, I saw those X eyes. This time, they were tilted as if his head was cocked. He took a couple of steps forward, which allowed me to see his dark hoodie. I couldn’t even see his real face, but his entire demeanor was predatory.

“Thank you for understanding,” I blurted before I rushed out the door. The entire way to the car, I kept glancing over at the spot I’d last seen him, but he was gone. I sort of wished I was actually going crazy so that none of this was real. I’d take some appointments with a psychiatrist over whatever the hell was happening here.

I didn’t unlock the door until I was right in front of it. Once I got in, I hit the button to lock it, then dropped my forehead to the steering wheel and took a few deep breaths. My ribs hurt when I breathed, which couldn’t be a good sign.

Why didn’t they sell Xanax over the counter? Oh yeah, addiction. I was willing to risk it if it meant I didn’t stress myself into a heart attack.

“Don’t be a weak bitch,” I muttered.

Raising my head, I started the car. My headlights turned on and I looked out the windshield. A scream tore from my throat before I covered my mouth with my hands.

Ten feet ahead of me, in an empty parking space, he was crouching in the glow of my lights. The neon was less noticeable in the brightness, but I could see the rest of him clearly. I hadn’t been this close to him until now and I wished I hadn’t learned that he was the size of a linebacker. I had no chance of outrunning him or fighting him off.

His head cocked again, another taunt. I drew in a shaky breath and kept my eyes on him as I shifted into reverse. With a very brief glance in my rearview camera, I backed up faster than was safe, then turned the wheel and raced out of the parking lot. When I looked in the mirror, I saw those glowing Xs fading with the distance.

I was going to die. That was the only way I could see this thing turning out. I had a huge, masked stalker who knew where I lived, what I drove and apparently, where I went. He knew about Jayce and Mike. Somehow, he’d programmed his number into my phone. Those were all portents of my impending departure from this world.

My knowledge of stalkers was pretty limited. That’s what happened when you’d been fortunate enough not to be in this situation before. One thing I did know was that things escalated. It was only going to get worse, which meant I was in real danger from this person.

Women died at the hands of men far too often and not enough was done to prevent it. Regardless of that depressing fact, I headed straight for the police station. As soon as I pulled in, my phone buzzed. My heart began racing automatically. I had a feeling that any time it went off from this point forward, I was going to panic.

Erebus: I don’t recommend that.

My fingers tapped on the phone as I went through my options. It was stupid as hell to reply.

Alana: Who are you?

Erebus: I thought you were a clever fox.

Alana: What does that even mean?

Erebus: It’s your move, Alana.

Alana: What will you do if I don’t listen to you?

Erebus: Telling you would ruin the fun.

Tears pricked my eyes. I felt trapped in this decision. Going to the police was something I needed to do. His threats were a double-edged sword. They made it even more necessary but also made me afraid of what would happen if I didn’t comply. I wasn’t dumb enough to trust that the police could protect me or the others from him. It was a better chance than I had against him myself, though.

I stepped out of the car and headed straight for the entrance. At least in this place, he couldn’t try to hurt me. There were dozens of people with guns in here. When I left, though, it was a different story.

*****

I woke up feeling just as groggy as I had the past few days. This time, it wasn’t because of alcohol. I might have slept better if I got drunk, actually. Instead, I saw blue Xs every time I closed my eyes. I couldn’t relax all night and found myself looking out each of the windows at intervals, but he hadn’t been there.

It should’ve made me feel better. It absolutely did not.

Yesterday, I went against his wishes. His absence felt more like the calm before the storm.

Then again, this was just a man. He held power over me for a moment, but maybe he was too afraid to actually get caught. His confidence in his ability to fuck with me had to be shaken now that I’d involved the police.

Right?

At the very least, he’d need to be more careful. No hanging from rooftops or blocking my car. The police said there wasn’t a whole lot they could do based on what I’d told them, but they were going to try sending a squad car by my apartment complex every so often. The man told me they’re only a phone call away. That wasn’t very encouraging. By the time they arrived, I could be dead on the floor with a knife in my back.

I shuddered at the thought as I ground my coffee beans. Once it was brewing, I turned and thrust my hands over my head to stretch. A glimpse of something from the living room caught my eye and made my stomach start to churn again.

On the coffee table, there was a bouquet flowers. They were arranged elegantly in a black, glass vase, and they were in seemingly every shade of the rainbow. It was fancy as hell.

There was a little card standing on the table beside it. I picked it up and flipped it open to find a Hershey’s kiss taped to the paper. Blood red ink swept across the card in the same handwriting I’d found on my car.

The proper way to end a date.

I can’t wait to show you what happens on our second.

Erebus

Um, no. No thanks.

Picking up the vase, I headed to the front door. After staring out the peephole for a minute, I opened it and set the vase on the ground. The next time I left, I’d take it to the dumpster, along with his stupid fucking kiss.

I’d barely made it back to the kitchen when there was a knock. My blood felt like it ran cold at the sound. A moment later, the lock turned. I grabbed a knife from a drawer and crouched beside the island, raising up just enough to see over it.

“Alana,” Jayce called as he stepped inside.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” I breathed.

He came into the kitchen and cocked his head. “What’s going on?”

“I thought… Nevermind.”

When I straightened, he gently took the knife from me. “Why are there flowers outside?”

“They’re not welcome here.”

“Care to expand on that?”

“Not really.”

He hummed as he grabbed two mugs from the cabinet and poured us each some coffee. I took one gratefully and returned to the living room. Spiders skittered down my spine just from being in here. Now that I’d gotten rid of the flowers, everything was beginning to hit me at once.

The stalker had been in my apartment. He’d left the vase and god knows what else he did. What were the chances that he watched me sleep? Probably pretty damn high. The thought made me nauseous.

How did he get in? Jayce said it was ridiculous to think the guy could hack into security cameras, but he’d found a way around the lock on my door. I didn’t know how hard that really was, but your run-of-the-mill human wouldn’t know how to do it. I’d been completely at his mercy. I hadn’t even slept much last night and the fact that he’d been in here at a time when I wasn’t wandering around freaked me out more. It was as if he knew where I was, even when I was inside.

“Ah, midterms,” Jayce droned, tapping his finger on the stack. “I always hated them more than finals. Need any help grading?”

“That would be a lifesaver if you mean that.”

“Of course I do. Jayce to the rescue.”

With a laugh, I picked up the stack. Weren’t there two before? An unfinished and a finished one. As I thumbed through them, I was shocked to find that they were all graded.

Um…

Had my stalker graded my tests for me when he broke into my house?

“Let’s get to it,” Jayce suggested, rubbing his hands together excitedly.

“Actually, I forgot that I finished these last night.”

“Oh. In that case, we can go stuff ourselves full of sushi. That new place finally opened up in Percival Square. I’m telling you right now, I’m gonna embarrass you with how much I’ll eat today.”

Chapter 12

Alana

As one of my students, Marcel, read from his PowerPoint slide, I tried to keep my focus on what he was saying. I couldn’t give him a grade if I didn’t hear a word he said. For all I knew, he could be going on about how and why they make cheddar cheese orange.

At least I had my midterms graded. Well, they were graded, even though it wasn’t me. I’d looked over them all and they were done correctly, though.

Thanks, mysterious stalker who probably wants to kill me and eat my thighs.

It was weird that he still hadn’t shown his face- or mask- since Friday. He hadn’t sent any texts or left me more gifts. That was suspicious. Maybe he got picked up by the police for loitering. That would be some satisfying karma. I bet he was sitting in a cell, maskless and vulnerable with his balding head and rat face.

“Thanks, Marcel,” I said when he reached his last slide. “I appreciate how much work you put into your project.”

He smiled awkwardly and shuffled back to his seat. I glanced at the clock and decided there wasn’t enough time for someone else to present, so I got to my feet and grabbed a stack of midterms to pass out.

“Most of you did well on this,” I said as I made my way down the rows. “You’ll see that I’ve marked areas where you may need improvement. This is an advanced placement class, so you need to put in extra effort if you want that college credit. Do you want to take something like this again when you get to the university?”

“No,” a few voices chimed in.

“What, you don’t want to learn about ancient Mesopotamia again?”

A few laughs sounded around me. After I’d passed out the last test, I leaned back against my desk. There were some frowns in the room, but I was actually pleasantly surprised by the grades. At the beginning of the school year, I’d been worried about how effective I’d be because of what happened. It had been nine months at the time but some days, it still felt like yesterday.

That was the thing with grief, I guess. It ebbed and flowed so that you could never really be sure how you’d feel from one day to the next. Sometimes, I felt ready to face the rest of my life. Other times, I wanted to stay in bed with my eyes closed so I could pretend that when I opened them, he’d be looking back at me. If I didn’t look, the empty side of the bed didn’t have to be real.

“Alright, you all can get out of here,” I announced. “Go be crazy with your parents until I have to see you tomorrow.”

“Bye, Miss Monroe!” a couple voices bellowed. I waved, then took a full breath when the room was empty.

Even though I complained about my job, I did love these kids. They were on the cusp of adulthood. Some of them were actually eighteen already. It didn’t feel like it was that long ago when I was in their place.

I had a class in this room during my sophomore year. Mr. Kauzen had been part of the reason I became so obsessed with history. It was my passion, which might not seem very interesting to most people, but I was a boring bitch who could watch the History Channel or go to a museum and feel like I’d died and gone to heaven.

I moved to the window and looked out at the football field in the distance, remembering the first time I’d seen him. Me and my friends had been watching the freshmen tryouts, laughing and fawning over the boys like our lives depended on it. I hadn’t been sure if I wanted to date a jock because the movies always made them out to be assholes, but then I’d thought about ones like A Cinderella Story where the quarterback actually turns out to be a sweet guy who adores the female lead. That was something I could get behind.

When he took off his helmet, my worries didn’t matter. He was beautiful and I decided that I’d find a way to get to know him. I wasn’t shy, per se, and I was in that mid-level popularity in school where I could talk to most groups of people and they accepted me.

It was supposed to be my happily ever after. That boy with the dark hair and bright eyes felt dangerous in the most delicious way. When he smiled, the sun shone down on him. I saw the scar on his lip and thought it added something special to his face.

Yeah, that guy had been Jayce. I didn’t know he was a twin at the time, so when I saw Jake in the hallway one day, I struck up conversation. We hit it off immediately and it wasn’t until he brought me home to meet his family that I realized my mistake. Jayce came down the stairs and I’d seen that scar. My mouth dropped open when I saw that they looked exactly the same aside from that.

It didn’t really matter, of course. I’d seen him first, but I fell in love with Jake. He was the one who took me out to ice cream and a movie. He met me in the park when I snuck out of my room to avoid my parents yelling, which was often. Eventually, it became me, Jake, and Jayce. We were a trio that was inseparable all through high school. When we got to college, it was more like me and Jake, and me and Jayce. They were still close, but our relationships evolved in different directions.

Me, Jake, and Jayce. Those were three things that would never be together again. And that was depressing as hell.

A soft knock made me turn around. Mike stood in the doorway with his hands in his pockets. He offered me a smile but didn’t come inside.

“I hope you’re feeling better,” he said.

“Yeah, I’m okay. I think my stomach was just rejecting that wine at dinner because of all the alcohol the night before.”

“Next time, we’ll skip the wine.”

I bit my lip and diverted to my desk so I could gather my things. The buses were pulling away outside and generally I’d stay a little longer, but I didn’t feel like being here after my trip down memory lane.

“Are you heading out?” I asked.

He nodded. “I’ll walk with you.”

I wanted him to, but I didn’t know if it was a good idea. Nothing had come of Erebus’ threats so far, but I was afraid to push him any further.

Oh, god, I couldn’t believe I was referring to him as Erebus in my head now. He was stealing my love for mythology and that was completely unacceptable.

“How’s your daughter? Going hard on the candy, I bet.”

He laughed. “Too much. I had to hide it so that I could portion it out at intervals. She’s going to knock the world off its axis with all that energy.”

“We need to find a way to siphon some of their energy. I know I could use it.”

“Maybe we could use them to power the world.”

“Not a bad idea. How old is she?”

“She’s about to turn ten.”

I hummed. “It goes fast. Every year when I see Jake’s cousins, they look a foot taller.”

At the mention of him, I cleared my throat and looked forward. It was hard to stop bringing someone up in conversation when you’d been doing it for so long.

“That guy at the party,” Mike ventured slowly. “He’s Jake’s brother.”

“Yeah. How’d you know?”

“Jake came to a few school events with you. When I saw your friend, I was confused. I didn’t realize he had a twin.”

“Yup. Jayce and Jake. The football stars of Alpine Grove High School.”

“Does that make you famous here by association?”

“Maybe,” I laughed. “Probably not for what I’d want, though. People used to claim that I was in a relationship with both brothers. That or they’d ask me if I ever mixed them up in the bedroom. High schoolers are gross.”

“So, it was never like that with Jayce?”

My eyes narrowed a little as I pushed open the door to go outside. “No. He’s my best friend. Are you scoping out the competition?”

“Can you blame me?”

I stopped and turned toward him. He stared at me with a soft expression that made me never want to hurt him. I suddenly felt pissed off that my stalker wanted to get in the middle of my relationships. If he’d leave me alone, I thought me and Mike could have something together. He had a kid, which I wasn’t sure about, but I’d figure it out if I decided to keep seeing him.

“Me and Jayce are just friends. After Jake, I can’t…”

“I can understand that.”

“Look, Mike, there’s a lot going on with me right now.”

“Ah.” He looked down at his feet and nodded. “No worries. I get it.”

“I’m not saying that I don’t want to explore this, but we might need to slow it down. Like, way down.”

The smile returned to his face. “No kissing on porches. I can manage that.”

“Okay, cool. Thank you. Really.”

His arms came around me and I hugged him back. It was a simple gesture between friends who could someday become more than that. Besides, we were at the school. There were security guards here and if they saw a man in a mask, they’d get rid of him immediately. It was safe here.

Yeah, right. A safe school in America. That almost made me laugh out loud.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said, walking backward toward the other side of the lot. “Lunch in my classroom. Just food. No funny business.”

With a playful eyeroll, I turned around. Once I was inside my car, I pulled down the visor to look in the mirror. Something silver fell into my lap and made my heart speed up.

A Hershey’s kiss.

The bastard could get into my car now? I didn’t know how that was possible. This was full of a thousand computer components and the alarm would sound on my key fob if anyone messed with it.

Rolling down the window, I tossed the chocolate outside. I’d do a good deed later to make up for littering.

My phone buzzed, making me tense. I swallowed hard as I unlocked it to check the text.

Jayce: Don’t forget about dinner.

Oh, god damnit. I did forget. It was better than being home alone, so I headed toward his place, not caring that I was going to be early. He’d never complained about me barging in before.

Chapter 13

Jayce

“And then,” Mom wheezed, curling forward and almost spilling her wine. “Charlie told him that he was just mad because he didn’t even have one hole to stick it in.”

Alana was trying to rein in her own laughter. She shot me a look and I shook my head with a smile. This was how things always were with my family. It was fun to be around now that I was older, but they were exactly the same when we were teens, which could sometimes be mortifying.

We didn’t have the nuclear family. When me and Jake were five, my mom and dad met Charlie. She was a junior in college and applied to be our babysitter since my mom was going back to work. Mom told her she couldn’t have the job because she would end up having an affair with the babysitter.

Long story short, she wasn’t kidding. Instead of hiring her, Mom and Dad asked her out. They’d always been polyamorous but had only been with each other since a few years before they had us. Six months later, Charlie moved in with us and they’d been together ever since. She was a mom to us and when I was a teenager, I sometimes confided in her more than my parents.

In school, people tried to give us shit for it, but we always let it roll off of us. I was never bothered by the dynamic in my house. It did lead to gossip about me, Jake, and Alana, which annoyed me more.

When I looked up, I found Charlie watching me. I raised a brow and she moved her gaze to Alana. I narrowed my eyes at her. Charlie was the only one who knew how I felt. I had no idea how she’d figured it out, but she told me about it during my freshman year of college. After I made her swear not to ever say anything about it, she only occasionally brought it up when we were alone.

“This wine is amazing,” Dad commended, swirling it around in his glass. “You’ve become a vintner in your old age.”

“Fuck off,” I laughed. “It’s just wine.”

“You could start selling it. Create a little nest egg for the future.”

“It’s more work than it’s worth. I just like doing it for myself.”

“And Alana,” Charlie noted with a smirk.

“I should’ve probably helped more,” Alana said. “I made him do all the work.”

“Jayce is good like that. If he ever finds himself a wife, she’ll be the luckiest, most spoiled woman alive.”

Shooting her a glare, I adjusted on the couch. “That just sounds like more to put on my plate. My job already steals fifty hours from me every week.”

Alana scoffed. “I never see you working. Any time I text you, you’re immediately down to hang out.”

“Priorities, Alana.”

“Must be nice. Although, I do get summers off. One day, maybe I’ll have enough money to start taking long vacations.”

“You could take a road trip,” Dad suggested. “You’d be surprised how much of the country you can see on a moderate budget.”

“Not alone,” Mom chided. “You don’t know who’s prowling the highways in search of a woman alone.”

I snorted a laugh, then smothered it with my hand. My mom read too many horror books. Besides, I’d never let Alana drive across the country by herself. There was only one person who was allowed to make her fear for her life.

I was on day three of making her sweat. She was on edge and even since she’d been here, I’d seen her look out the windows countless times. She knew that Erebus was still around but aside from the little gifts, she had nothing to go off of. I didn’t want to wait long enough for her to let down her guard, but I’d give it a little longer.

This weekend. That was when things would start heating up.

“Oh, there was something we needed to talk to you about,” Mom said suddenly. The mirth was gone from her expression, so I leaned forward and motioned for her to go on. “We had a conversation with a probate lawyer today.”

“A probate lawyer?” Alana repeated. I could see the apprehension in her eyes. Reaching over, I took her hand and squeezed it. I wasn’t sure what was going on, but that familiar feeling of dread was rising in my chest.

“Yes. We found out that Jake…” Mom took a deep breath and leaned closer to Dad. “He has a daughter.”

Alana tried to pull away from me, but I held her hand tighter.

“We know,” I said.

“You know?”

“Yeah, we found out because of the life insurance. He gave most of it to the kid.”

Dad nodded. “That’s partially what this is about, actually. We don’t know that much right now, but there have been some issues regarding who should control the money since she’s a minor.”

“Shouldn’t her mom do that?” Alana asked, sounding a little bitter.

“Her mom died recently. Not too long before Jake.”

That was news to me. When I found out about the kid, I didn’t give a shit about the details. Jake told me a little bit, but I only cared about him coming clean to Alana.

“Who has custody?” I asked.

“Her stepfather is her legal guardian. He doesn’t want us to have any contact with her because Jake was never involved.”

“What does this have to do with you guys?”

“Well…” He breathed a laugh and ran a hand through his hair. “In most cases, the living parent would be appointed the custodian of a minor’s funds. Her mother appointed Jake, so upon her death, he had control of the money she left for her daughter. He appointed Alana.”

“What?” she shrieked. “I don’t understand. Why would he do that? How could he do that? I haven’t been told any of this.”

“The lawyer is supposed to reach out to you this week. It doesn’t mean that you have to be the custodian, which is why they spoke to us. We’re blood related, so the court could potentially see us as an option. Since Jake appointed you in his will, you’re the first choice, but the lawyer thinks that we might be better suited to it since she’s our granddaughter.”

“What about the stepdad?” I asked.

“It’s a possibility. Neither of Alicia’s parents designated him and he’s had issues with finances before. The court wants to ensure that a responsible party has control of the money.”

“Tell them to use a court-appointed custodian. None of us know this kid.”

Mom frowned. “She’s your niece, Jayce.”

“She was hardly even Jake’s daughter, so I don’t see how that matters. Alana shouldn’t have to deal with any of this. He already fucked her over with this bullshit.”

“I understand that he made some mistakes and I’m not condoning anything that’s happened, but this is a child. Your brother’s child. We should all want what’s best for her.”

“Maybe her stepdad is what’s best for her. He’s the only dad she knows, I’m sure.”

“Maybe, but if they’re going through the trouble of reviewing all of the options, I want to be involved in that. She’s a part of him and we were never given the chance to be involved.”

“I need some air,” Alana blurted before she stood. I watched her flee out the front door and fought the urge to follow.

“Jayce,” dad said.

“Look,” I sighed. “I’m not saying that I wouldn’t want to be a part of her life, but she’s nine fucking years old. She doesn’t know any of us exist. Do you think it’s best for her to go and blow up her life by throwing three grandparents, an uncle, and an almost stepmother at her? I just don’t see what good it will do.”

Mom stared at me with a furrowed brow. “How do you know how old she is?”

God damnit. That was the second time I had a slip of the tongue because of this situation.

“I found out before Jake died,” I admitted. “I told him he had to tell Alana about it. He never did.”

“Fucking Christ,” Dad huffed. “Why the hell wouldn’t you tell us?”

“Why is everybody angry at me for not saying anything? I’m not the one who cheated or kept a secret for a fucking decade.”

“You should’ve said something,” Mom said softly.

“I’m tired of answering for Jake’s sins. If he’d just died earlier, maybe things would be a hell of a lot easier.”

“Jayce,” Charlie scolded.

Getting to my feet, I grabbed my jacket and moved toward the door. “Thanks for coming, guys. Feel free to stay as long as you’d like.”

When I opened the door, I deflated. Alana’s taillights were already fading into the distance. Now I wasn’t just annoyed. I was pissed.

I closed the door and returned to stand behind the couch. Curling my fingers over it, I took a deep breath.

“Whatever you guys need, I’ll do it. I’ll speak to the court if they want, talk about your character. Anything. If you want to bring her into our lives, I’ll be the coolest uncle she’ll ever find. I don’t want control of the estate, so that whole thing is on you guys, but I’ll support you. I just don’t want Alana to have to deal with any more shit because of what he left behind.”

“Neither do we,” Charlie replied. “She’s family and, believe me, I was pissed when I found out about all of this, but Alicia didn’t ask for this either. We’ll do what we can for Alana. Always.”

With a nod, I grabbed my wine glass and carried it to the sink. It would be nice if I could just focus on my game with Alana, but the universe kept dropping more shit on us. She was going to be even more fragile. Maybe I could make that work in my favor. She needed something to lean on, a release.

Soon, baby. I would give her one hell of a distraction.

*****

Alana’s phone wasn’t active, so I was pretty sure she was asleep. I closed the front door as softly as I could. Glancing around, I was surprised that there weren’t beer bottles or an empty fifth lying around. I was glad for it. Stress drinking at our age quickly turned into alcoholism.

I carefully made my way down the hall and pushed her door open a little further. She was on her stomach with her face turned in this direction. Her nose was squished against the pillow and her lips were parted. It was fucking adorable.

Her blanket was thrown off to the side, giving me a view of her in just a pair of cotton underwear. I wanted to run my tongue in the crease between her ass and thigh. It was right fucking there, calling my name.

Just a few days. Then, I would give us a proper introduction.

I left her there and went to the kitchen. Quietly, I opened the fridge and took out her coffee creamer. I returned to the hallway and peered through the door as I pulled my cock free. Just staring at her ass was enough to get me hard within seconds.

With every stroke, I imagined pushing deeper inside of her hot cunt. I pictured how her pussy would look wrapped around me, stretched until she was red and swollen. When I made her squirt for me, I’d drink every drop, then let her taste herself. Maybe I’d add that to her coffee next time.

The thought of her drinking her own cum made me suck in a breath. I positioned the carton at the tip of my cock and held it there until my orgasm faded. I set it down and dragged my index finger through the last bit of it on my tip. Taking a few steps into the room, I stared down at her while she slept.

I crouched beside the bed and softly traced her lip with my cum. Her brows pulled down before she turned to the other side. On my way out, I opened one of her drawers and pulled out a pair of her underwear. Next time, I’d return it and get hard from the knowledge that she’d be walking around with my cum between her legs.

After I returned the creamer to the fridge, I looked around. I tossed the chocolate in the air and caught it as I tried to decide where to leave it. I set out her favorite coffee mug and left the kiss beside it before I left the apartment.

I hated all Hershey’s chocolate, but she loved these. I wondered how many I’d have to leave before she finally decided to eat one. Stubborn little brat.

Chapter 14

Jayce

“Are you sure you can’t reschedule?” I asked.

There was shuffling on the other end of the phone, then Alana swore. “No, I’ll be fine, Jayce. I don’t need you to be there.”

“Beg to differ.”

“It’s fine. You can’t just rush back here anyway. If I feel like it’s going to kill me, I’ll give you a warning so you can say your final goodbyes.”

“Not funny,” I grumbled.

Patrick waved at me and I held up a finger. If I’d known that Alana would have to meet with the probate lawyer this week, I would’ve considered canceling this trip. It wasn’t really up to me, though. Even though I had nearly full control over my schedule, there were still some things that were required for my job. These goddamn meetings were one of those things. I had to be here for three days to discuss our projects with the people who paid for them. The work itself wasn’t bad; it was just tedious when I knew that Alana was struggling back home.

“Alright, just tell me how it goes.”

“I will,” she agreed.

After I hung up, I joined Patrick by one of the prototype helicopters. It wasn’t one of mine, but it was beautiful. I designed mostly higher end military equipment worth more than three of these. With that came more pressure from the men in suits who thought they were better than the people who spent countless hours making these things.

They were all corrupt, if you asked me. Whether it was corporations, the military, or the federal government, all of these rich pricks had their hands in places they shouldn’t be. When you got chummy with them, it didn’t take much for them to start blabbing about their less respectable enterprises.

“Patrick,” I greeted, taking his hand firmly.

“Mr. Weste, it’s great to see you again.”

“Jayce.”

“Right, of course. Your presentation in there was quite impressive. Not that I wouldn’t expect that from you.”

I flashed him a smile. “If I do something, it’s with my whole ass, not just half.”

He laughed and gestured toward the entrance. We started in that direction, meeting up with a couple other executives along the way.

“You all remember Jayce Weste,” Patrick announced.

“I haven’t had the pleasure of meeting him,” one of the men said, holding out his hand. “Viktor Campe.”

He was wearing a suit that wasn’t quite as nice as the others but still probably cost nearly what I made in a month. He was newer- young, fresh blood. It was evident in the way he held himself and glanced at the others as if looking for their approval.

Taking his hand, I smiled at him. “I’m sure we’ll see each other occasionally, Viktor. They like to drag me to these things because I don’t choke up around all of you intimidating gentlemen. My pretty face doesn’t hurt, either. Don’t worry. I saw you looking.”

The group roared with laughter. Patrick slapped me on the shoulder like we were old pals. “Last time I saw Jayce, I told him he should leave engineering behind and join the corporate world.”

“And I told him I’d need to borrow one of his fancy ties so that I could hang myself.”

“He’s something, this one. Jayce, we’re going out tonight and I’m dragging you along.”

“I can only assume this involves booze and expensive women.”

He grinned. “Only if we’re lucky.”

Even though that didn’t sound appealing, I agreed. Outside, we passed by a few more prototypes that had been set up for this event. I stopped at one in particular, a military drone that was only slighter taller than me. The sign beside it made me clench my teeth.

In Honor of Jaykob Weste

I remembered when he was working on this. He didn’t have projects as big as mine and this was one of his more important ones. What nobody here would know was that I’d helped him with quite a few of the components. He was good at what he did, but he didn’t do well under pressure. Expectations made him choke. He was weak.

Viktor came up beside me. “Weste. Any relation?”

“My brother.”

“Oh, wow. You’re in the same field. That must be exciting.”

“It was interesting.”

He looked confused, then he read the rest of the plaque. “I’m sorry.”

“Did you kill him?”

He looked at me with horror on his face. “No, uh, I…”

With a smile, I shoved my hands into my pockets. “Don’t apologize, then. It’s all good.”

I turned and rejoined the others. He’d probably think I was weird now, but it didn’t matter. He was another guppy here. The other suits were familiar with me and they’d probably band together against Viktor if I disliked him. That was how this world worked. He’d be eaten alive if he kept trying to suck up to everyone.

*****

Between the boisterous laughter and the music, it was so fucking loud. It might be better if things were less blurry. Were they blurry or was I moving? I looked down at myself. I was sitting, so it must’ve been the former.

Booze this expensive wasn’t fit for human consumption. It went down smooth and settled heavily in my bloodstream. When Patrick pushed another shot toward me, I shook my head and made a cutting motion across my throat.

“Come on, Weste. First meeting isn’t until eleven.”

“You’re the devil,” I shouted over the music. “Last one, though.”

He clapped his hands together and I blew out a breath before knocking it back. I slouched further into the seat and stared up at the ceiling. The flashing lights were actually pretty nice to look at. If I kept at it, though, I’d probably get sick.

I pulled out my phone and frowned down at the unanswered text I’d sent Alana. She’d been vague about her conversation with the lawyer and when I insisted that she tell me more, she read it, then left me hanging. I didn’t appreciate that. I pulled up her screen and saw that she was reading. She was probably trying to distract herself.

I had a better way.

Navigating to my app, I sent her a message.

Erebus: Are you ready for our second date?

My leg bounced while I waited for her to respond. The bubbles popped up a few times, then disappeared as if she was going back and forth about texting back. When the phone vibrated, I sat up straight.

Alana: Leave me alone.

Erebus: Never. What if I showed up right now?

Alana: My friend will kill you.

I laughed out loud and shook my head.

Erebus: Cute, but it’d take him a long time to get to you.

Alana: You think you know everything.

Erebus: I do. Want me to prove it?

Alana: Leave me alone.

Erebus: If you wanted that, you’d stop responding.

I waited patiently and watched her go back and forth between her e-book and the message. Morbid curiosity was a bitch and none of us were immune to it. She’d been left to wonder about me for six days without anything more than a couple of kisses left around to remind her that I still existed. I bet she’d come up with a million questions that she convinced herself she’d never ask.

It was definitely the booze that made my patience crumble so soon.

Erebus: When I take your pretty cunt, will you scream for me?

Alana: Leave me alone.

Erebus: Remember how you came for me last time?

Alana: What are you talking about?

Erebus: You have such sweet dreams, don’t you?

I watched her screen go black and laughed. My neck prickled, making me turn around. Viktor was standing behind my seat with wide eyes. When he met my gaze, he looked like a deer caught in headlights.

“What the hell are you doing?”

“Just… Uh, just….” He stumbled over his words pathetically. I could tell he wasn’t drunk enough to forget what he might’ve seen. God damnit.

He scurried over to his chair and sunk into it. I kept staring at him, which seemed to make him more uncomfortable by the second.

This guy might be a problem.

*****

After moving the party back to Patrick’s suite, I slipped out for a while. Everybody was fucked up and they wouldn’t notice. I’d leveled out quite a bit- enough for me to organize my thoughts a little better. I came back carrying a bottle of vodka and made a beeline for my new friend.

“You haven’t had enough to drink,” I said, sliding a shot over to Viktor.

He eyed it and pulled his lip between his teeth. I cocked my head as I waited for him to make a decision. When he still looked unsure, I made a sound to get the attention of the others.

“This guy’s new, right?”

“Just out of college,” Patrick confirmed loudly. He nearly toppled over from the exertion.

“Well, this fucker needs to get initiated. Five in a row.”

I lined them up, triggering a horrified look from Viktor. As expected, the others circled around him and started to taunt him. Like I said before, they liked me and they weren’t sure about him yet. He chose to work in a field that was sink or swim. I just needed him to jump in the water first.

Viktor shook his head. “I don’t want to.”

“See, I told you,” Patrick slurred, slapping the back of his hand against Rob’s chest. “He’s not cut out for it.”

I leaned forward and dropped my voice low. “I’m trying to help you out here. The business world is just like college. Get in with the big leagues and you’ll be set.”

He still looked uncertain, but he nodded and picked up the first glass. I brought my bottle of water to my mouth to conceal my smile. He gagged a little, then went for the second.

I remained tense until he put back the last one. While the others cheered, I took the bottle of vodka and shut myself in the bathroom. I tipped it upside down in the tub until it was empty, then rinsed it out a few times. I’d drop it in the dumpster outside later, but I wanted to be extra cautious.

When I returned to the room, Viktor looked slightly more drunk than he had before. He’d only consumed half as much liquor as he thought and things were just going to get worse for him as time went on.

“We should do this again tomorrow,” Rob said.

“I’m busy tomorrow night,” I replied. “Next time, though.”

Chapter 15

Jayce

It was encouraging when Viktor called out sick from the meetings the next day. Everyone laughed about him being too green for their world. By this time tomorrow, the kid wouldn’t be in the world at all.

Sometimes, these things were too easy. When people thought of poison, their minds usually went to hemlock or cyanide. If they were smart, they would figure out how to get their hands on ethylene glycol- thanks Ben and your extensive network of friends. It was the toxic ingredient in antifreeze and with the right dosage, it was lethal. Since he’d been drinking alcohol, some of the effects, such as metabolic acidosis, could be attributed to that. Even postmortem, they rarely checked for ethylene glycol unless they had a good reason to. Viktor would go into cardiac arrest at a certain point, effectively taking care of his nosey ass.

Murder wasn’t my modus operandi in most cases but since things were becoming more serious in my game with Alana, I couldn’t take chances. If any suspicion was cast on me, this whole thing could unravel quickly. She’d already made a police report, which hardly concerned me, but I didn’t want to add anything else to the case.

That was the reason I’d caught a plane after today’s meetings. I had to go back on the first flight in the morning, but it was worth it. This way, nobody knew that I was in town. When Erebus visited Alana, there was no way she could imagine it was me when her mind started spiraling and overthinking.

I didn’t want my car to be seen on any traffic cameras, so I decided to walk from my house. It was only two miles and I was able to cut through neighborhoods. In my hoodie and backpack, I looked like the average midnight wanderer in New York. This area was far from boujee, so I wouldn’t draw any attention as long as I didn’t stand around and look suspicious.

It was nearly one in the morning and since it was Friday, I knew that Alana would be asleep. She held firmly to the opinion that the last day of the week warranted rest and if any partying was to be done, it should be on Saturday. She hadn’t used her phone in two hours. If she was awake, that wouldn’t be the case.

I walked into her apartment and gave it a quick once over. It was still and quiet. The little box on the wall had a red light, showing that the alarm system wasn’t active right now. It was so nice to have control of these things from my phone.

Crouching, I set my backpack on the floor and unzipped it. I pulled out the rope- a rough texture that would quickly chafe her skin if she struggled. After wrapping it around my arm, I filled a syringe and tapped out the air bubbles. It wouldn’t knock her out for long and when she woke up, she’d have a hard time fighting through it. Since she lived in an apartment, I couldn’t have her screaming too much. Just a bit.

I stepped into her room and dropped the rope on the floor. The small thud made her stir a little, but she didn’t wake up. After turning my mask on, I knelt on the bed, positioning a leg on each side of her hips. I pushed forward so that my cock rubbed on her ass through my jeans. She made a disgruntled sound and when I settled my hands on the mattress, she peered at me over her shoulder.

With a gasp, her eyes went wide and she tried to roll over. I grabbed onto her wrists, holding them down.

“Get off of me,” she shrieked.

“Shh.”

She let out a sob as she tried to buck me off. I lowered myself, pressing my weight into her back. With the mask touching her face, I inhaled. When she took a deep breath, I covered her mouth to muffle her scream. She tried to bite me, so I flipped her over and straddled her before I locked my fingers around her throat, cutting off her air.

“Not a very clever fox,” I said, making my voice sound deeper and adding a slight accent. I’d practiced and recorded it for an insufferable amount of time to make sure she wouldn’t be able to recognize me.

“Please,” she whispered.

I ground my hips into her, drawing a whimper from her lips, then pulled the syringe from my hoodie pocket. Her eyes flashed to it and another sob shook her. She squeaked when I pushed the needle into her neck. A moment later, she went limp.

Easy as pie.

Now it was time to set up.

I got to work with my tools and started making a couple of holes in the ceiling. There was a supporting beam that was inside and ran from one end of the room to the other. It was the perfect structure for my purposes.

Once the hooks were secured, I tugged on them hard to make sure they wouldn’t pull free when she inevitably struggled. I threaded the rope through all six of them, which would help to distribute the weight from each spot.

Grabbing Alana, I undressed her, then flipped her onto her stomach and bent her legs so that her heels pressed into the backs of her thighs. I wrapped the rope around her ankles multiple times to keep them secured, then moved on to her wrists. Taking the ends, I pulled them taut and looked her over.

With her legs bent and her arms suspended above her, her knees rested on the mattress but just barely. It put enough pressure on her wrists that it would hurt. If she struggled, it would be a lot worse. Her legs weren’t bound together, but instead were each connected to the rope on the corresponding wrist, keeping her spread open for me. She wouldn’t be able to gain any traction since she couldn’t use her feet, which left her completely at my mercy.

While she was still unconscious, I grabbed the labia clamp and laid underneath her to situate it. It was almost funny how I felt like I was working on a car in this position. The view was significantly better.

The clamp pinched either side of her labia and the shape narrowed at each end. I adjusted it so that it held her open and connected the two clips and plugged them into the handheld device.

When I rolled onto my knees in front of her, she let out a little sound and opened her eyes. She still looked extremely out of it, so I pressed one of the buttons, delivering a shock through the length of the metal clamp. She jerked and released a huff of air. I pressed one finger against her clit and did it again, humming at the sharp feeling of electricity that passed over my skin.

“Hello, Alana.”

Her eyes finally focused on me before they widened. She thrashed, then hissed and looked up at her wrists. I gave her a moment to evaluate her position, watching every emotion pass over her face. In the end, she settled on fear. It was just as fucking beautiful as I knew it would be. When her lip trembled and her eyes filled with tears, I reached out to catch one with my finger.

“Don’t touch me,” she cried.

“Too late.”

“No, please. Please, please, please.”

“Begging already? I thought you’d make me work for it.”

She hung her head and began blubbering. I pressed the middle button and she cried out at the shock that traveled through the metal, all the way up to her clit. Another tear rolled down her cheek and her breaths were shaky.

“W-why are you doing this?”

I cocked my head. As I ran my thumb over the buttons, she tracked my movement. She tried to close her legs but could hardly move them and when she did, it tugged on the ropes around her wrists too much.

“Remember when you went against my advice?”

“You can’t do this.”

“Hm. That’s interesting.” I pressed the highest button, earning a shrill cry. “Shh. If you’re too loud, I’ll have to put a gag in your mouth. I’d much rather hear every sound you make.”

“Tell me who the fuck you are,” she demanded more aggressively as she yanked on the ropes. Her wrists already looked red underneath. If she wasn’t careful, she’d break the skin at a certain point.

Moving closer, I brought my face level with hers. She sucked in uneven breaths but stared directly at the mask. I wished she could see my eyes.

“Let me introduce myself, Alana. I am the one who owns you. I am your savior but also your undoing. I’m who you should fear when you hear something move in the middle of the night. Every creak of the floorboards should make your body tremble with my nearness. When your neck prickles and you feel like you’re being watched, I want you wet and needy because you know who lurks in your shadow.”

“Fuck you. You’re crazy.” She screamed when I shocked her again.

I moved my hand between her legs, which made her start thrashing. After I slid my fingers over her entrance, I pulled them back and held them up to her.

“I’m crazy? You’re the one who’s wet right now, Alana.”

“Not because I want it.”

“Hm.”

I held my finger down on the button and watched her face. After the initial pain, her head tipped back and her shoulders tensed. A moan slipped from her lips and my cock began to harden. I dipped my fingers under the mask to taste her as I listened.

“S-stop,” she pleaded.

“Mm. Beg, Alana.”

“Stop. P-please.”

When I inserted two fingers, she gasped. Her hips moved, then she realized what she’d done and went completely still. She looked at me with fury in her eyes and tried to maintain that expression as I stroked her g-spot.

“I think what you’re really begging for is to cum.”

“No.”

She spat at me, which just made me laugh. I moved forward and rubbed the mask against her cheek to clean it off. When I removed my fingers, I smeared her wetness in the same spot before I shoved them into her mouth. She bit down hard, so I dug my nails into her tongue until she released me.

“That’s an example of what we don’t do.”

I turned the toy down to low before I unzipped my pants. Her breaths picked up and she averted her gaze. Holding onto my cock with one hand, I grabbed her face with the other, forcing her to look down at it. When she closed her eyes, I yanked on the end of the rope to pull her up higher. She cried out in pain, but I held her there until she finally looked at me.

“Keep your eyes on my cock,” I instructed.

She shook her head, so I reached for the rope again.

“Wait,” she rasped. “I-I’ll look.”

Tentatively, she dipped her head. She began to shake more violently than before as she watched me stroke myself.

“Don’t worry,” I murmured. “I’m not going to fuck you with it this time.”

“This time?”

“I think that’s more of a third date move.”

“No, please.”

“Stop telling me no.”

“N- I’m sorry.”

“Good. You have a choice now, Alana. Piss on you or cum on you.”

Her mouth hung open and I thought about how satisfying it’d be to shove my cock inside while she was restrained like this. She couldn’t fight me off. Her tears would coat my shaft, becoming a part of me for the night, then they’d mix with my cum in her throat.

“Choose, Alana.”

“None.”

“Then maybe I’ll fuck you.”

“No! I, uh…” Her eyes moved past me as she struggled to decide. “Why a-are you doing this to m-me?”

“Because deep down, you’ve always wondered what it was like. Don’t try to lie.”

“Not like this.”

“Call it a touch of realism.”

I ignored the vehement shake of her head. It was possible she was going to turn into a sobbing, incoherent mess soon, which didn’t work for me. With a sigh, I got off the bed and pulled her drapes closed, casting the room in near total darkness. I rifled through her closet until I found a thick scarf, then tied it over eyes, making her freak out even more.

I turned the machine back to high and let out a groan when she shrieked. One of my hands settled on her breast while I pushed three fingers into her. She squirmed, trying to get free, but she had nowhere to go. I focused my attention on her G-spot while I repeatedly brushed my thumb over her nipple. She was fighting off her orgasm with everything she had.

Lying on my back, I moved underneath her, settling between her legs. She tried to close them, only to fail again. With the glow from my mask and the clamp spreading her wide, I could see how her cunt glistened above me. Removing the mask, I let it rest beside my face so that it would continue to light my way to the paradise that was in front of me.

Sticking out my tongue, I raised up on my elbows and made one long swipe from her clit to her entrance, then pushed it inside of her. Returning my fingers to her pussy, I pumped them in and out. She was fucking dripping and when I pulled them back out, her wetness slid down my palm.

I unfastened the clamps, then bit down on her sensitive vulva. She cried out and started begging nonsensically for me to stop. Instead, I suctioned her clit between my lips before I started working her with my tongue.

“You’re going to cum regardless,” I said in-between strokes. “And you’re going to enjoy it. If you wanna fight it and edge yourself, go right ahead. Until you soak my face, I’m not moving from this spot.”

Chapter 16

Alana

My body was completely overridden by panic. My brain wasn’t working correctly and I was desperate for a way to escape. No matter what I did, I couldn’t get out of the ropes and the more I tried, the worse they felt on my skin. I was going to have marks, maybe even sores.

I was fucking terrified. I had no doubt that Erebus chose to come here today because he knew that Jayce was gone. He knew everything.

There was literally nothing I could do about my situation. He’d claimed all of my control and was exerting his own in the most fucked up way possible. Almost. The only way it could be worse was if he fucked me. According to him, that was going to happen the next time he saw me.

Not if I had anything to say about it. If I survived this, which I wasn’t entirely sure would be the case considering he was a fucking maniac, I was going back to the police station. I’d show them the marks on my arms and have them swab my entire body for DNA. His saliva was everywhere, so that had to be worth something.

If I did what he told me to, would he leave? He was a stalker who wore a mask and left chocolates around my house while I slept, plus he had threatened more than one person in my life. I think the correct answer was ‘no.’

I didn’t exactly have a choice here, though. He wouldn’t stop until he got what he wanted. My body was being forced to respond and no matter how hard I fought it, I knew that he was going to make me cum. My eyes burned with a sense of shame and helplessness. I wanted to beg him to stop, but it wouldn’t do any good. He seemed to enjoy my desperation.

He was sick- twisted in a way that deserved the forcible removal of his dick.

He nipped at my clit, making me suck in a breath. I jerked when he applied direct pressure with his tongue, then moved it back and forth rhythmically. The way he curled it kept the nub cocooned in that warmth.

Why did he have to be good at this? This wasn’t the type of skill you learned from the internet and practicing on props. This was a craft he’d perfected and that didn’t align with the image I’d conjured of him. He was supposed to be some incel who preyed on women because he couldn’t get one to sleep with him willingly. This man was smooth and exuded confidence. I was still going to assume he had a rat face under that mask. If only I could fucking see him while he had it off. Maybe I’d recognize him. I needed to know where this whole thing started.

As if he could sense that I was trying to distract myself, he bit down on my clit hard. I wanted to kick him, but my feet were secured to the backs of my thighs. It was uncomfortable and I’d lost feeling in them a while ago.

My heart raced as the tingling spread outward. Heat built in my core, regardless of how hard I tried to keep it at bay. He was relentless, never sticking with one sensation. For a moment, he used the tip of his tongue and overstimulated me until I felt like I would burst, then he focused on the sensitive nerves surrounding my clit.

“Stop,” I whispered loudly just before the muscles in my thighs engaged. Nothing could stop me from tumbling over the edge once he pushed his fingers inside of me. My mouth hung open and my head drooped as my body convulsed more violently than it had in a very long time. Maybe ever.

With no control of my body, this was a different sort of torture. It felt fucking good, but the pleasure was tarnished by the state of my mind.

He tucked his fingers between my calves and thighs, flattening his palms against my skin. His tongue thrust into me a few times as I rode out the last of the tremors. The deep growl that left him was so strong against me that it almost made me cum again.

When his touch disappeared, I was able to breathe a little easier, but being unable to see him left me wondering what would come next.

I cried out when the tension in my arms disappeared and I fell backward on the bed. It sent pain through my legs in their awkward position. Suddenly, there was a heavy weight pressing down on my waist, barely allowing me to pull in air. There was roughness against my skin and when I realized it was his jeans, I started to cry again.

“Y-you said you wouldn’t.”

The blindfold came off and I was again looking up into those blue Xs. With the room darker, it looked even creepier as he loomed over me. A flash of silver drew my eyes to the knife he was holding.

I knew it. This was when he killed me. He was probably going to fuck my body as it cooled just to disrespect me one more time.

Who was going to find me like this? Probably Jayce. That thought was enough to force more sobs from my chest.

“Calm the fuck down,” he said, almost gently. Every time he spoke, I tried to place his accent. It sounded like a faint Irish lilt. Maybe he was part of the mafia.

When he brought the blade down, I squeezed my eyes shut, not wanting to witness the moment it drew first blood. There was a tug on my legs, then he grasped my calf and straightened it. He followed suit with the other and the rush of blood into them was almost more painful than when they’d been secured.

“Hold your tits together,” he instructed.

Opening my eyes, I stared up at him. I was torn between anger and self-preservation. Since my hands weren’t secured anymore, I swung at him. He caught my wrist, cocked his head, and made a quick slice along my palm.

Fuck, that hurt. They never flinched when they did that in movies. Blood dripped onto my chest and began to roll into the space between my breasts. He seemed to be watching it, although I couldn’t see what his eyes were actually focused on.

Taking my other wrist, he positioned both of my hands on either side of my breasts and pushed them together. It caused the pain in my palm to flare and I could feel more blood flowing from it.

“Stay like that.”

Officially in compliance mode, I did as he said. I wanted to argue when he grabbed whatever metal toy he’d been using before. It pinched and spread me open, making me feel even more violated, even after everything he’d already done. A shock traveled across my vulva and I had to bite down on my tongue to keep from screaming. As if he wanted that, he turned it up higher.

He swiped his fingers through the blood on my skin and I watched in horror as he spread it over his shaft. When he moved forward and pushed his dick between my breasts, it was a snug fit, but the slickness helped him slide through.

A groan left his throat as he pulled back, then thrust forward again. I attempted to hold back my tears while he pleasured himself using my body.

“Watch,” he commanded in a firm voice.

Dipping my chin, I kept my eyes on my chest. Every time he moved forward, his head pushed through the top of the gap. It glistened with blood and precum. When he paused, I had a bad feeling about what was coming.

“Taste it.”

My lips trembled as I leaned down. As quickly as I could, I brushed my tongue over his swollen tip. The salty and metallic flavor made me gag and when he thrust forward a little more, he slipped between my lips.

“Stay there and keep your tongue out.”

I forced myself to keep my eyes open as he continued his movements. He sped up, his dick disappearing, then sliding over the tip of my tongue repeatedly. As the minutes dragged on, I began to wonder if death would be a better alternative than what he was doing.

My own hips jerked from the painful overstimulation between my legs. It was torture. I was stuck in a horrible place between nearly coming again and wishing I could cut out the nerve endings. It hurt and yet, I could feel my arousal still dripping out of me.

Finally, he thrust forward hard and stilled. His cum shot onto my tongue and even though I wanted to close my mouth, I knew it would only get me in trouble.

When he pulled his dick out, he shoved three fingers into my mouth. He swirled the blood and cum mixture into my tongue, then pushed them to the back of my throat. I gagged and turned my head. After I swallowed, he released me and got to his feet. If I thought it was over, I was a naïve idiot.

He grabbed onto my hair and twisted it so that I was facing him. Standing beside the bed, he nudged my lips with his dick. I wasn’t going to suck that thing. He’d already used me enough.

“Open,” he demanded. I shook my head and he tightened his grip, making my scalp burn. “You didn’t choose, so you get both.”

Reluctantly, I parted my lips, expecting him to start fucking my mouth. The first thing I became acutely aware of was something hot. For a second, I thought he was cumming again, but it kept going. The taste registered next. It was slightly salty with a bitter tone to it. I tried to dislodge from his grip, but he held on tightly. He squeezed my jaw to keep my mouth open as he continued to piss into it. I choked on it, spewing some of it back out. When he was finished, he held my mouth shut.

A fresh wave of tears flowed down my cheeks. Knowing I didn’t have a choice, I swallowed it, which triggered a series of gags. In the middle of nearly throwing up, he filled my pussy with his fingers. There had to be at least three and with everything going on down there, he didn’t meet much resistance, even though I didn’t fucking want this.

“Show me how pretty you scream after swallowing my piss and cum.” He straddled my legs, bracing a hand beside my head as he continued to pump in and out. “Do you think I can make you drench me, Alana?”

“No,” I cried.

“Tell me that you want me to make you cum.”

“No!”

He secured a cover over my eyes again, then curled his fingers. A choked sound escaped my throat unbidden. My body grew hot as something deep inside of me felt like it was twisting, winding me up so tightly that I worried when it crested, I would completely break.

“Mm,” he groaned. “You’re so fucking wet. Listen.”

I didn’t have to listen. It was all I could hear aside from the blood pulsing madly in my ears. The room was filled with the sound of his fingers fucking me and the wet squelch of my pussy accepting his touch, begging for it. I’d never been this wet and it was so fucking wrong.

Erebus wrapped his fingers around my calf and pushed my leg upward. He pumped harder and faster, forcing me into my orgasm. My back arched off the bed as the band in my lower stomach snapped and shocks traveled outward in every direction. My pussy gripped him so tightly, it was painful for a moment. When he pulled his fingers free, I felt liquid rush out of me. He dropped to his elbows and sealed his lips over my entrance, fucking drinking from me like I was the fountain of youth.

Who the fuck was this man and why was he doing this to me?

Immediately after, I rolled onto my side and curled up in the fetal position. The electrical current between my legs shut off, which helped me to think more clearly.

His breath rustled my hair before his lips pressed against the skin behind my ear.

“You’ve been marked by me. Now, you’re mine. And I’ve been marked by you. That makes me yours.”

Tearing off the blindfold, I tried to turn so that I could catch him without his mask on, but there was a sharp prick in my neck. My body went limp and it only took a few moments for my eyes to fall shut.

*****

When my eyes opened, the room was blurry. There was sunlight coming in through the window. The blinds were open, which was weird. I distinctly remembered making sure they were closed before I went to bed.

I sat up quickly and put a hand over my lips. One would think my mouth would taste horrible, but it was… fresh. I realized my hair was slightly damp and when I sniffed it, the scent of my shampoo was strong.

He bathed me and brushed my teeth after he drugged me. What the actual fuck?

Looking down, I saw that the sheets had been changed. I jumped to my feet and started studying the space. Everything else looked the same. The hooks were still in the ceiling, but there was no rope. Those, the red rims around my wrists, and the cut on my palm were the only things that actually solidified that what happened last night was real.

A familiar little chime came from the hallway. I opened the dryer and found the bedding in there, freshly cleaned and devoid of any evidence. Since he’d washed me, I assumed I didn’t have anything to use there either. There was nothing I could show the police except for the marks on my arms. Was that enough for them to believe me? Maybe whatever drug he’d injected me with could be identified too. It was possible they’d think I was just an addict, but it was worth a shot.

My head spun and I had to move back to the bed. I grabbed my phone from the nightstand, unsure of what I should do.

Alana: When will you be home?

Jayce: I’m getting on a plane at 2. Everything ok?

Alana: Yup. I miss you.

Jayce: That’s a high honor. I’ll stop by.

Alana: No. Not today.

He sent me another message, but I ignored it. I couldn’t answer whatever questions he’d have for me. He would see right through me. On top of that, he wanted to know what happened with the probate lawyer. It wasn’t anything interesting, but he’d hound me until I gave him a detailed transcript.

There were too many things happening in my life right now. My mind was becoming a jumbled mess and at the moment, I didn’t know what weighed on me more. Logically, it should be the masked rapist, but everything felt so heavy right now.

I wanted Jayce to come over, but I couldn’t take comfort from him at every turn. It was a fast track to advancing our relationship, which just couldn’t happen. God, I wished he would go out and start a serious relationship so that he’d be off the market and I could find a way to stop thinking about him that way. Jake may be dead, but that didn’t mean I could be with Jayce. Too much tainted water flowed between us.

No, this was something I had to deal with on my own. The last thing I needed was for him to go vigilante on me and try to hunt the guy down. He wouldn’t get hurt because of me. Losing him would completely devastate me beyond repair.

Chapter 17

Jayce

When I got off the plane, I didn’t go directly to Alana’s place. I imagined she was working through some intense emotions and, honestly, I wanted her to feel them. What was the point if I went and made her feel better after I did all of that to start breaking her down? I wanted her to move into a state where she decided to keep it inside and deal with it herself, which I was sure would be her reaction. If she had me there to support her while she was still so raw, she’d probably spill everything and I’d have to play the role she expected by convincing her how fucked up it was.

It may have been fucked up, but she’d be okay. If things went the way I wanted them to, I’d be able to gradually twist the key to her mind until the door flung open and let me inside. Soon, she’d start to question her thoughts and desires.

Even if she decided to go to the police again, they wouldn’t have anything substantial to investigate. She’d realize it was all but hopeless because I wasn’t some amateur who came into this unprepared. Once she accepted that she was at my mercy, her mind would be mine.

Opening my bag of fertilizer, I ran my fingers over the small amount that was left. I credited the perfection of my last batch of wine to this particular substance. It was a shame that it was almost gone, but we’d had a good run.

“One last ride,” I said as I scooped the rest of it out. After I’d spread it through the garden, I stared down at the plants.

The sweet potatoes would be ready for Thanksgiving and I found that fitting. When we talked about what we were thankful for, I might say something about Jake still being with us, watching over us. Sustaining us. Contributing to the healthy growth of the food we ate.

Turning human bodies into fertilizer wasn’t even that difficult of a process. It took my brother only a couple of months to become something more useful than he’d been in life. I had one of the bottles of wine set aside to age and I may never open it since it was the last piece of him that remained.

It wasn’t as if I’d hated the guy. He was my brother and there were many things we’d enjoyed together. I loved him but a lot of the time, I didn’t like him. In the end, he hurt Alana one too many times and he was in my way. Watching him take his last breath while the betrayal burned in his eyes triggered a slew of memories from our past. I never had to fake my grief; I just had to conceal my relief.

I liked to think that he’d be glad I was here to take care of Alana. Despite his myriad of faults, he did love her. Not enough, but I was trying to think of positives while I watered him into the earth.

When I went back inside, I washed my hands, then pulled out my phone and navigated to a news site for Denver. My lips curled upward when I saw one of the top headlines.

Man found dead in Denver hotel suite.

When twenty-nine-year-old Viktor Campe failed to show up for his flight Saturday afternoon, his coworkers at Elrod Aviation Technologies contacted hotel staff to conduct a wellness check. Campe was discovered deceased on the floor in his bathroom. The exact cause of death is unknown, but a contact within Denver PD speculates that Campe may have died of natural causes. Stay tuned for more information as it becomes available.

It was a sink or swim world and when you stuck your nose where it didn’t belong, you should expect to be drowned.

Things were rolling with Alana now. I wouldn’t allow a single thing to get in the way of that, even if I had to kill more people along the way. None of them were as important as my future with her.

I walked down the hall to my bedroom and opened the door to my closet. There was a small box sitting atop a shelf, tucked behind the other shit I had stored up there. I grabbed it and set it on the bed, then flipped the top.

Picking up the plain wedding band, I ran my thumb over the smooth metal. I hated gold, but Jake thought it was classic. Alana wanted it to be buried with him, so he’d been wearing it when they put him in the ground.

I pocketed the ring and stuffed the clothes I wore as Erebus into my backpack. I wasn’t going to fuck with her tonight, but I wanted to see her after she went to sleep. If she happened to wake up, I couldn’t be wearing anything she might recognize as mine.

There was a stop I needed to make along the way, so I climbed into my Bronco and headed further into the city. The office was small, located in a strip mall, which might make things easier if I had to resort to less desirable tactics.

I parked on the other side of the lot and walked to the suite I needed. The woman at the desk looked up and flashed me an overly friendly smile.

“Welcome into Moore, Levian, & Associates. Do you have an appointment?”

“No, I actually didn’t know I was going to pursue this. There’s a case that involves my family. I want to get information about it.”

“Do you know who the attorney on the case is?”

“Moore.”

“One moment.”

She stood and disappeared into the back. I took a Hershey’s kiss from a bowl on the desk and smiled. Even though I hated them, I popped it into my mouth. I grabbed one more and put it in my pocket just before the receptionist returned with a man who looked barely out of law school. His dark curls were cut close to his scalp and he wore a dark blue suit that was more stylish than I’d expect from a recent grad. He must’ve come from money. Most likely, there were prestigious lawyers in his family considering he was already a partner at this firm.

“Hello, I’m Carl Moore,” he said, holding out his hand. I shook it firmly and smiled in a friendly way. “Luna said you’re here for a case involving your family.”

“Yeah, it’s regarding Jaykob Weste and his daughter, Alicia.”

“If you join me in my office, we can discuss that.”

I nodded and followed him to the end of the hall. He held the door open, then motioned for me to sit on a couch off to the side. He settled in an armchair and crossed his legs.

“You must be Jayson Weste, considering you have the same exact face as Jaykob.”

With a tight-lipped smile, I shrugged. “I had it first by seven minutes.”

“Twins always say that sort of thing. Is it true?”

“Maybe. My parents don’t remember. Mom refused medication, so she was a raging mess and dad was smoking a joint before she went into labor. I think he was still smoking up until one of us was halfway out and the nurses had to go find him.”

“That’s… interesting.”

“They’re very free people.”

He laughed before he clasped his hands on his knee. “I wasn’t under the impression that you were interested in being involved with this case.”

“Let’s just say that I want my parents to be happy, which means doing what I can to help them. And if they do find a way to have Alicia in their lives, I want her to know me.”

“You’re aware that this is not a case for custody or visitation rights. It’s simply to establish a conservator for the estate left by her parents.”

“I know, but it’s still important to them. It’s a step, I guess, and they want what’s best for the kid.”

“Do you?”

“Of course. That’s why I want to support them.”

“And what is it you’re looking for here? To say your piece, get information, or test the waters?”

“I want to know the details.”

He regarded me carefully. The longer I was around him, the more convinced I was that he had more prowess than his age would suggest. He was good at appearing objective at all times and his stare felt like it was meant to intimidate. I leaned forward and quirked a brow.

“There’s not much I can do for you, Mr. Weste. I don’t represent your parents or Alicia’s father. I’m here to help the court determine what’s in the best interest of the minor involved.”

“Does that mean you can’t tell me anything?”

“I can tell you what the process will look like, as well as what you can do to help. I can give you the court dates and any updates along the way. If you want information about the other parties involved, that’s not something I can provide.”

“So, if I wanted to talk to Alicia’s father…”

“I’d recommend going through the courts. In the state of New York, some records are sealed, but you could always try.”

“Fuck,” I muttered.

“Marriage records, on the other hand…”

I snapped my fingers and got to my feet. “You’re right. Thank you, Mr. Moore.”

“Was that the only purpose for your visit, Mr. Weste?”

“It’s one of them. I’m sure we’ll meet again.”

I left his office without another word and made a beeline for the exit. Luna said something to me as I left, but I was on a mission. As soon as I was in my car, I pulled out my phone and started typing in information. I knew who Alicia’s mom was, otherwise I’d be shit out of luck. We’d gone to high school with her and judging by how old the kid was, Jake and Hailey had their fling junior year, not too long after she and Alana had their falling out.

Fucking asshole. Who could blame me for killing the bastard?

Finally, I found the record of filing. They got married when she was eighteen, which meant he was the only dad Alicia ever knew. I wondered if she was aware of the truth or not. I tried to remember if Hailey had been dating anyone during high school, but I hadn’t seen her since Alana stopped talking to her. As far as we knew, she ended up moving.

They didn’t even become enemies. They just completely went their separate ways. Hailey had issues and she was sort of an attention-seeking bitch, willing to do anything for a moment of fame, even at Alana’s expense. I was surprised she’d even kept the baby a secret when she could’ve rubbed it in her face instead.

I looked at the names and stroked my jaw. Interesting. It turned out I wouldn’t be spying on my girl tonight. There was something else I needed to explore.

Chapter 18

Alana

“Did I tell you that you look nice today?”

I looked at Mike over my sandwich, trying not to scowl. Nice? I rolled out of bed, considered quitting my job, felt sick with shame all over again when I thought about what happened Saturday, and threw my hair in a bun before I trudged into this place. One of my students asked me if I was sick, so that was cool.

“Thanks,” I muttered dryly.

“You’ve seemed sort of down. Did something happen?”

With a sigh, I dropped my sandwich. I didn’t have an appetite when I started and I sure as fuck hadn’t found one along the way.

“Just some things I’ve had to deal with since Jake passed.”

“Oh. I know a bit about tying up loose ends like that.”

I considered whether I should confide in him. He’d been through something similar, apparently, but I was sure the situation was much different.

“Unless your wife has a secret baby out there and you’re expected to suddenly be in charge of its financial future, I don’t think you can really help me.”

His eyes widened a little. “I was expecting something more along the lines of, ‘I found his stash of ecstasy under the floorboards and don’t know if I should sell them, flush them, or take them.’”

When I laughed, he looked a little less horrified by my situation. I was surprised the guy hadn’t run off yet. Not only had Jayce punched him at the party, but I then proceeded to run out in the middle of our date, and I’d since sort of friend zoned him. Now, I was oversharing some fucked up personal shit. Maybe nice guys did exist.

“Thanksgiving is in a couple of weeks,” I noted. “Do you have family that you spend it with?”

“Yeah, but not this time. They’re in Florida and I usually fly out for the weekend, but things are tight this year. Losing my wife’s income has made things hard.”

“I understand that and so does my shitty one-bedroom apartment. I can’t imagine being responsible for a whole other human on top of it all.”

“It’s a good thing she’s likable. Do you have plans?”

“I’ll spend it with Jayce’s family.”

“Not yours?”

I looked down at my sandwich and started peeling off pieces of the crust. “They’re not around. Even if they were, I would be with Jayce’s family.”

“Whatever the situation is, it’s good that you have them. Being alone for the holidays isn’t good for anyone.”

I hummed my agreement, not sure what to say. Being alone was better than spending time with my own family, even if I could. Since my mom got out of prison two years ago, I’d only spoken to her twice. At first, I wanted to see if we could have some sort of relationship, but it had been so long.

When my parents got arrested, I was sixteen, which meant I couldn’t live on my own. I only had a part time job and Albany wasn’t exactly a cheap place to live, so it wouldn’t matter anyway. I had no savings, no credit, and not enough income to qualify for a rat-infested cardboard box. My options were to move across the country to live with an aunt I hadn’t seen in five years or find another option. Thankfully, my brother was an adult and was able to be my guardian, but I actually lived with Jake’s parents. It was better for me and Ben because he wouldn’t have been able to support me. Once we graduated, me, Jake, and Jayce pooled our funds to rent a two-bedroom apartment while we went to college. It all worked out, even if the process was a bitch.

My dad was still locked up. He’d received a harsher sentence since he was worse. Child abuse in New York was taken seriously enough that someone could earn up to twenty-five years. He got fifteen while my mom received eight.

They weren’t that bad. At least, I didn’t think so as a teenager. Maybe I was just used to it. If anyone asked me back then, I would have said they were harsh. Tough love and all that. A slap to the face or being thrown down the stairs once in a while wasn’t the worst thing a kid could go through at the hands of an adult, plus I knew foster care could be a nightmare, so I never said anything about what went on at home. When I started dating Jake, I spent a lot of my time with him anyway.

I didn’t hate them, but I wouldn’t go out of my way to have a relationship with them. Like I said, it had been a long time. I’d lost interest in any of that. Ron, Sara, and Charlie were my family and I was completely happy with that.

My phone buzzed, drawing me out of my thoughts.

Jayce: Where are you?

A smile tugged at my lips. I hadn’t spoken to him much over the weekend for obvious reasons. Hearing from him, though, was like being given a warm blanket in the middle of winter.

Alana: Work, duh.

Jayce: If I have to hunt you down, I’ll make you regret it.

Alana: Jesus. Put the claws away. Ms. Kim’s old room. Remember?

Jayce: Like it was yesterday.

“You have a nice smile,” Mike noted. He smirked at me and I cleared my expression. I didn’t know I’d still been smiling.

I gathered my phone and the rest of my sandwich, stuffing it back in the bag. When I got to my feet, he did too.

“You leaving?”

“Yeah, Jayce-”

I stopped abruptly. Somehow, I felt his presence in the room. I wasn’t sure why the back of my neck prickled and my stomach felt heavier suddenly. A hand pressed against my lower back, which helped me avoid swaying.

Great. Anxiety was going to attack at random now and send me into a whole episode. Was that PTSD? No, that seemed a little dramatic. Then again, I’d been bound and assaulted… Don’t think about that. Don’t freaking think about it.

Jayce’s hand moved around my side, allowing him to tighten his arm around me. His fingers rested just above my waistband and shifted my shirt so that he was touching my bare skin.

“You remember Jayce,” I said awkwardly, looking at Mike.

His lips were thin while he nodded. “Yup. I remember his right hook too.”

“I’m left-handed,” Jayce pointed out, sounding smug.

Oh, I was hating this dynamic already.

“I’ll see you after the last bell,” I said before pulling away from Jayce and turning toward the exit. He followed me into the hall silently. When we made it to my door, I whirled on him. “What are you doing?”

He raised a single brow. “Am I doing something?”

“You were rude.”

“By correcting him?”

“It’s your whole…” I gestured nonsensically at him.

Crossing his arms, he looked me up and down. “Is your friend threatened by me? I wasn’t aware that the two of you had something more.”

“We don’t.” I unlocked the door, then gasped when he pushed me the rest of the way in and closed it behind us. He turned me around and leveled me with a serious look.

“You’ve been pulling away from me, which means there’s something going on with you. Tell me.”

“I’m just stressed out.”

“Try again.” When I set my jaw, he tipped his head back and groaned. “You don’t want to talk about the estate, that’s fine. I’m out of my mind with worry, though. Has that guy been back?”

“No,” I lied, although I wasn’t sure why.

“Thank god. Hopefully it was just some Halloween freak wanting to mess with you that weekend. You’ll tell me if anything weird happens, right?”

“Of course. And, uh, on the off chance that I do decide to get cameras, do you have any in mind?”

He grimaced. “Will you be mad if I tell you I already bought them?”

“Jayce,” I scolded. “You need to stop trying to do everything for me.”

“If I was doing that, I would’ve had them installed already while you were at work. The cameras are non-negotiable. When you decide you want them is up to you. As you can see, I’m all about autonomy.”

“I don’t think you know how autonomy works.”

With a grin, he strode further into the room. He stood by the window and stared toward the football field. I wondered if he was thinking the same things I was last week in that position.

Dropping my lunch bag beside my desk, I was about to collapse into my chair but paused. I looked over at Jayce quickly, then stared at the ring that sat on top of my desk. In the middle, there was a Hershey’s kiss.

Impossible.

I picked up the ring and turned my back to Jayce just in case he came over here. There were a lot of gold rings in the world. It would be ridiculous to assume that this was Jake’s. When I traced the delicate pattern etched around the circle, I felt less certain. It wasn’t custom made, but it couldn’t be a coincidence that this was the same style.

It had to be one that he bought at the store. Jake was buried wearing this ring. That meant Erebus knew exactly which one Jake had. Both options were unsettling. One was downright sickening.

Slipping the ring into my pocket, I joined Jayce at the window. “That door was locked, right?”

“Yeah, you unlocked it when we got here.”

“Oh, good. I’ve been forgetting lately and I don’t want my purse to get stolen because my head is in the clouds.”

“Can’t trust none of these kids.”

“I think I’m more worried about the teachers. You should see our paychecks.”

He smiled down at me as he brought a piece of gum to his mouth. “Look, I’m not really a foot guy, but if you really need the money, I’ll buy some pics.”

I snatched the gum before it reached his lips. “You’re annoying.”

The minty flavor was refreshing. There was something about chewing gum in autumn that felt right to me. Sensing his stare, I turned and gave him a questioning look.

“That was my last piece,” he said, narrowing his eyes.

“Want it back?” I joked, holding it between my teeth.

A wicked smirk curved his lips. Grabbing the back of my head, he held me in place while he leaned forward. My heart leapt into my throat when his lips touched mine. He took the gum and pulled back, facing the window again as if that was completely normal.

Sharing gum had always disgusted me. The only thing I could think was that it was someone else’s spit sponge, but I watched his jaw move as he chewed it and by god, if that didn’t somehow make me feel warm.

“Don’t forget our coffee date on Sunday,” he noted, sounding completely casual.

“I wouldn’t dream of it.”

Chapter 19

Jayce

There was movement in the front window, but I couldn’t see anything substantial. A thin, sheer curtain covered the glass, which gave me only glimpses of silhouettes inside. A smaller one moved quickly through the room, followed by a larger one.

From my place across the street, I had a good view of the house. It was simple and not too big, but in pretty good shape. The neighborhood was older; it was one of those places where a lot of the people had lived for decades. Since I got here a couple of hours ago, I’d seen a lot of older couples. It seemed safe for the most part.

It was further out from the area I lived by about thirty miles. I was a little shocked when I found out it was this close, though. Jake’s kid had lived an hour from him and he wasn’t involved. That was what they’d agreed on but when Hailey died, that changed.

I’d never thought to thoroughly go through his things until after I spoke with the attorney. Since he wouldn’t give me information, I had to find it myself. My backup plan was to try sneaking in to steal a glimpse at his files, but that was risky. I didn’t want to end up in jail for breaking and entering because of this. It wasn’t worth it. Thankfully, my brother’s emails offered helpful insight.

After she died, a lot happened. I found a series of texts between Jake and an unlabeled contact. After reading through them, I could safely assume it was Hailey’s husband. At first, he was polite. He wanted Jake to continue paying child support, which he agreed to. When he found out that his late wife hadn’t left him anything in her will, his tone quickly shifted.

Some sleuthing revealed that he and Hailey were legally separated for almost a year before she died. They were in the process of getting a divorce. There was a custody battle, but it was unlikely that he was on the winning side of that. He told Jake that they’d agreed to a fifty-fifty split, but my brother had been in contact with Hailey and knew that wasn’t true. She didn’t want him involved at all and she’d never actually put him on the birth certificate.

At a certain point, Jake blew up and decided he was going to fight for custody of his daughter. There were emails between him and a family law attorney that discussed all of the details. He had control of Hailey’s house, her assets, and every other physical possession she owned. The only thing he didn’t have was Alicia and, apparently, he had a change of heart about the whole thing. He didn’t want her to remain with her stepdad. He paid a ten-thousand-dollar retainer to secure a good lawyer and he was ready to fight tooth and nail.

From what I could tell, he had a good chance, at least according to the attorney. Worst case scenario, he believed that he would get partial custody. Best case scenario, he’d be awarded full custody. There were issues raised by Hailey in the divorce documents, which tipped the scales in Jake’s favor, even though he hadn’t been involved in Alicia’s life. As long as he was her biological father, the court would at least hear him out.

That was where I’d fucked up, apparently. Jake was supposed to establish paternity since he wasn’t on the birth certificate. He never got the chance to do the DNA test, though. With his death, the custody battle ended and things might have settled completely if he hadn’t passed everything on to Alana and Alicia, leaving her stepdad high and dry once again.

Staring at the house, I felt furious. This man wanted that money. Maybe it was for noble purposes so that he could take care of the kid, but I didn’t believe that for a second. My parents said that he had financial issues. That didn’t mean he was a bad person but combined with Hailey wanting him out of the picture and my brother finally stepping up to be a father- full time, at that- I knew he was a bastard.

Let’s not forget that he was trying to weasel his way into the life of the one who could hold control of those assets.

Again, I was fucking furious. When I’d seen Alana having lunch in his classroom, I nearly punched him again. Worse, I wanted to fucking kill him. The way he’d looked at me when I wrapped my arm around her gave me only a hint of the joy I’d feel if I snapped his neck. Maybe I’d cut off his dick. How many layers of skin could I slice away before he passed out or threw up from the horror of it? I’d love to find out.

I didn’t want Alana to know. Not yet, at least. I could see how stressed she was about the entire situation. A certain amount of it had to do with Erebus as well but soon enough, he would become her light instead of a dark entity in her mind. The shadows would comfort her and give her the escape she craved.

Once all of the lights had been off for a couple of hours, I got out of the car. I put my mask on, keeping the switch off so that it was dark, and quickly glanced around to make sure nobody was watching. Reaching over the side gate, I undid the latch and swung it inward. They had a set of French doors at the back of the house, which weren’t too difficult to unlock.

Closing the door lightly behind me, I took in the space. It was compact with a square kitchen and a small island. There was a dining nook off to the side and past that was the living room. A short hallway had three doors, one of which I assumed was a bathroom.

There were two options. Either this place had one bathroom, which was probably connected to both the hall and the master or Mike’s bedroom had its own bathroom, in which case Alicia’s room should be on the side with two doors to accommodate for the smaller space. It was a gamble and my guess was incorrect.

When I cracked the door, I saw a large bed; definitely not one for a kid unless she was the most spoiled princess in existence. The person sleeping there was tall, so that wasn’t the case. I stared at him for a few minutes, letting my rage dance around at the forefront of my mind. It’d be so easy to kill him in his sleep, but I wasn’t about to get that kid put into foster care. Even if my parents could petition for her to be placed with them, the process wouldn’t be smooth and she still might have to live with some shitty people at first.

There was a way this thing needed to go down. I didn’t have to kill Mike unless he forced my hand. I was too close to this one, easily connected.

I closed the door and turned around. Inside the other room, there was a smaller bed. Target acquired.

After I stepped inside, I left the door cracked. I stood at the opposite end of the room and stared at the girl. She was splayed on her stomach with her face angled in this direction. Her mouth was slightly open and she was snoring.

I hadn’t expected to really give a shit but fuck, she looked like him. Like us, I guess. Her nose was the same shape and she had our naturally tanned skin, whereas Hailey was pale as fuck.

Dropping into a crouch, I covered my mouth with a hand. God damnit, Jake. I hated what he’d done. It made me feel murderous when I found out he’d cheated on Alana. It was over ten years ago, but that didn’t matter. As far as I was concerned, it could’ve been yesterday.

Yet, right now, I found myself equally angry that he’d just… ignored it. Covered it up. Kept my niece a fucking secret. We all would have been angry. Maybe Alana would have left him. But this pissed me off. Jake went back and forth about wanting kids and Alana wasn’t all that interested, but I knew that he would have been a good father. Except he wasn’t because he chose not to be a father at all.

I didn’t care that Mike was her stepfather and the only parental figure she had. She should have a place in her family’s lives. If it came down to it, my parents would readily adopt Alicia. I’d be the dope uncle she could confide in and call when she got drunk at sixteen. Alana would tell her all about how fucked up teenage boys are and relay stories about all of our stupid adventures back in the day. There would be a certain amount of pain from knowing where Alicia came from but at a certain point, that would pass.

Yeah, fuck this English teacher and his sneaky plan to get into Alana’s pants. I’d make sure she stayed away from him and if that didn’t work, I would have a conversation with him myself.

Suddenly, Alicia’s eyes opened. I held my breath, hoping she would simply go back to sleep. I was wearing all black and if she didn’t focus too much, she shouldn’t be able to make me out in the darkness. She rubbed her eyes and released a heavy breath. It looked like she was about to close them, but then she sat up, locking eyes with me.

Fuck.

Putting a finger to my lips, I moved onto my knees and got closer. “Hey, Alicia. It’s okay. I’m the good guy.”

“Who are you?” she demanded, her gaze going to the door.

“You can think of me like a guardian. I’m just keeping you safe.”

“Like an angel?”

“Eh, no.” I scooted closer so that I was beside the bed. She leaned backward, looking afraid. “But I’m what you might call an antihero. I’ll fuck up the really bad guys, the monsters. That’s why I’m here. I took out a pretty gnarly one in your closet.”

Her lips pursed. “I’m nine. I’m not an idiot.”

I breathed a laugh and shrugged. “Yeah, I should’ve known you’d be a smart kid.”

“Why are you wearing a mask?”

“Because my face is super fucked up. You don’t want to see it. Want to see the lights on this one?”

She chewed on her lip and looked at the door again. After a moment, she nodded. I flipped the neon lights on and her eyes widened.

“Cool?”

“Creepy,” she breathed. “But cool.”

“I thought so too.”

“Are you…” She looked down at her hands. “Are you going to hurt us?”

“Of course not.”

“Oh.”

My head cocked. “Has someone hurt you?”

“No, not really.”

“What do you mean by that?” My stomach was churning, coming up with the worst possible scenarios. If I heard something terrible in this room, I wouldn’t hesitate to remove that man’s balls.

“Mom died,” she whispered.

“I know.”

“How?”

“I’m here to keep you safe, remember? I couldn’t do that if I didn’t know things. Tell me about your dad.”

“I don’t know him. I met him a couple of times.”

My eyes widened and I was glad she couldn’t see my expression. “You met him?”

She nodded quickly. “I was super little the first time. And then before mom… died… we went to the park with him.”

“Did you like him?”

With a shrug, she started picking at her blanket. I waited for her to go on, but it didn’t seem like she wanted to. I hummed thoughtfully, which drew her gaze back to me.

“Do you have a phone?” I asked. She nodded and pointed to her nightstand drawer. I pulled it out and typed in the number I used as Erebus. “If you’re ever scared or something’s wrong, you text me, okay?”

“You’re a stranger,” she mumbled.

“Not really, but we won’t get into that just yet.”

“Can I see your face?”

I shook my head. Since she’d met Jake, she definitely couldn’t see me.

After putting the phone back, I stood. “Don’t worry, Alicia. We’ll see each other again.”

“I won’t tell Mike.”

While I appreciated it, it didn’t seem like they had a great, trusting relationship if she was readily willing to keep our encounter a secret. Most kids would run to their parents immediately if a stranger in a mask was in their room at night. I hadn’t even asked her to lie; she’d offered it up freely.

“Go back to sleep, kid.”

She laid on her side but didn’t close her eyes while I moved toward the door. After one last look at her, I closed it behind me and continued toward the back. This situation warranted a shit ton of caution going forward.

I respected step parents. He’d been in her life from the start. I didn’t give a fuck, though. Something told me she didn’t belong here. Maybe it was about time she came home to her family. It was what Hailey seemed to want and so did my brother. That meant something to me, regardless of how I felt about him.

This whole thing had drained me. I found myself missing Alana more than usual and while I could hit her up and try to hang out with her, that didn’t feel like it would scratch this itch. I wanted more.

Since that moment in her classroom, I’d been dying. I was angry because I saw it in her eyes, that same longing I felt, but she wouldn’t let it happen and I was fucking tired of it.

It was a good thing she didn’t get a choice in the matter.

Chapter 20

Jayce

That anger I’d felt about our situation quickly morphed into a raging sort of possessiveness after my visit to Mike’s house. Behind my eyes, I saw his lips on hers at that party. Maybe he didn’t deserve to have lips anymore.

Yeah, Alana was gonna have to take this rage from me. And I had some ideas.

I’d taken a day to chill out so that I wouldn’t feel too crazy. Now, it was Saturday, which meant she got a good night’s sleep and was probably relaxing. It had been a whole week since she’d seen me. It was midnight, but her light was on in her bedroom. Perfect.

After I got inside, I left the door open. I dropped my backpack on the floor with a thud. There was a sound from the room, then her door closed.

“Did you miss me?” I called.

It was funny that she thought she could lock herself in there. The window was too high for her to jump without injuring herself. Really, she’d just cornered herself, which made this more fun.

Standing in front of the door, I courteously knocked. There was movement on the other side and I wondered what she was doing. Maybe trying to fashion a weapon. The thought of her drawing my blood this time made my cock half hard as I waited.

“Hey, clever girl,” I drawled, leaning against the doorframe. “The longer you keep me out, the harder I fuck you when I get in.”

There was a whimper from the other side that succeeded in bringing my cock the rest of the way into the conversation. Tapping my fingers on the wood, I hummed a Sleep Token song that I knew she liked. By the time I finished, the door was still closed, so I backed up, raised my foot and slammed it against it.

She screamed and threw something toward me. “Stay the fuck away from me!”

Reaching through the hole I’d made, I unlocked the door and stepped inside. She was pressed back against the window with her palms against the glass. In her shorts, I imagined someone would have a nice view of her ass from outside.

“Hey, gorgeous. You made me wait so long that I’m starving.” I looked down at the front of my jeans where my cock was obviously hard. Her breaths quickened as she frantically shook her head. “Want to make a deal?”

“Leave me alone.”

“I have some plans for you tonight that you may not like, but if you can shake me, I’ll let you out of it. Until next weekend.”

“That’s not a good deal.”

“It might be if I’m in a better mood then. Aren’t you going to ask why I’m grumpy?”

She shook her head. In three large strides, I made it over to her. When she darted to the side, I grabbed onto her hair and threw her back against the wall, making sure not to hit her head.

“It doesn’t really matter,” I continued. “You could probably make it better by kissing me or running your fingers through my hair. I wouldn’t say no to those pretty lips on my cock either, but we both know you won’t do that.”

“Not willingly,” she whispered.

I smiled to myself. “You’re learning. Here’s what we’ll do. I’m going to give you a sixty second head start. That’s generous of me. If I haven’t caught you after an hour, I’ll go home for the night.”

“I… You want me to run?”

“More specifically, I want to chase you like you’re a frightened little fox.”

“No.”

With a shrug, I grabbed her ass and lifted her. She struck out at me, managing to hit me in the side of the head. She tried to get her hands inside my hood to remove the mask, but I deposited her on the bed and pinned her wrists.

“Okay!” she shouted. “I’ll run. Please, I’ll run.”

“Sixty,” I said, lifting off of her. “Fifty-nine.”

She scrambled off the bed and rushed into her closet. She’d sacrificed some time to get her shoes on, which was clever. Most people wouldn’t think of it in their panic. I sat on the bed, counting down the rest of the way in my head. I saw her climb into her car and slam the door. Unluckily for her, I had her spark plugs in my backpack.

When I made it down the stairs, she was just getting out of the car. Her eyes landed on me and she froze. I stopped and cocked my head, waiting for her move.

She bolted. When she headed for another building, I ran after her. Just as she was about to knock on a door, I grabbed her around the waist. She flailed hard enough to make me lose my grip. I followed just behind her, letting her think that she might be able to outpace me. Alana wasn’t a runner and the only reason she’d be able to last any length of time was because of the adrenaline. It wouldn’t save her.

“Help!” she screamed. “Somebody help! He’s gonna hurt me!”

Rolling my eyes, I moved faster and latched an arm around her neck. She tried to dig her nails into my forearm, but the hoodie was thick enough that it didn’t do any good.

“Shut the fuck up or you’ll get somebody killed.”

“Oh, god,” she whimpered.

A light turned on in one of the units, so I picked her up bridal style and pinned her wrists. I took off, making it back to her apartment before anyone came outside. It was a dangerous game, but I knew she’d go for the car first and it got my blood pumping. One day, I’d bring her to the woods where there wasn’t a soul around for miles. That would be a fun hunt, but I’d rather it be after she actually knew who I was so that she wouldn’t hurt herself in her panic.

After shutting the door with my foot, I swiped my backpack off the floor and continued into her bedroom. Her squirming was a pain in the ass and by the time I dropped her on the bed, I felt winded.

Immediately, I grabbed the rope from my bag and started tying her wrists. Some of the fight had gone out of her. Her face was red and her chest was heaving as she tried to catch her breath. I tied her to the bed frame, then pulled out a leg spreader and clicked the ends into place to lengthen it.

“W-what are you doing?” she asked.

“Whatever I please.”

“Don’t.”

“How else am I supposed to punish you?”

“Punish me? I didn’t do anything.”

She kicked me when I tried to grab her ankle. I shook my head and wrestled it down to the bed. My firm grip made her cry out. Throwing her head back against the pillow, she set her jaw, trying not to cry. I fucking wished she would.

Maybe it was because I needed to own all of it. Jake made her cry, so I had to erase that and become her nightmare. Her dad hurt her, so I would become her pain. She didn’t have to fear anything in this universe so long as I was the greatest threat to her because she’d know that I would also inflict terror on anyone else who dared to threaten her. There was power in that, for me and for her. In a twisted way, it was a sort of trust that couldn’t be rivaled.

Once I’d removed her shorts and secured her legs, I pushed a pillow underneath her so that her pussy was angled upward slightly. Her stomach was shaking with her cries, even though she didn’t release a tear.

If she could see the excitement in my eyes, she’d be crying every tear in her body until there was nothing left. I reached into my backpack and pulled out the tattoo machine. It wasn’t anything fancy, definitely not professional quality, but I wasn’t creating top notch art here.

“N-no,” she said, shaking her head. “Don’t you dare come near me with that thing.”

“I have a question.”

“No fucking questions!”

Her anger made me smirk and I once again wished she could see my face. “Why didn’t you tell your boyfriend about us? Is our relationship so unimportant to you?”

“He’s not my boyfriend,” she snapped.

“Ah, but you knew exactly who I was talking about. Tell me, Alana. Do you want him to be your boyfriend?”

“No.”

“You’ve friend zoned the poor guy, haven’t you? I’ll admit, I was jealous the other day when I saw him all but kiss you. You enjoyed it.”

She turned her head away to ignore me, so I started setting the machine up with black ink. I’d thought about using a localized anesthetic, but I decided against it. I wanted her to feel it and remember.

When it was ready, I looked at her face. She was so beautiful. Part of me wanted to pull her against me and wipe away that tear that had managed to escape, but the other part- the one that had been born twelve years ago and became this twisted, wretched thing- needed this.

Dropping onto my elbows between her legs, I brushed my fingers over her thigh. “Do you love him?”

Her gaze snapped back to me. “It’s none of your business.”

“Sure, it is. It’s the reason I’m here right now, punishing you. You won’t give him what he wants, though, so it’s not a big deal. The teacher, on the other hand, is a fucking problem.”

“Fuck you.” She watched me bring the tattoo machine toward her with fearful eyes. “W-where are you gonna put it?”

“Just your thigh. Relax and close your eyes. It’ll be easier.”

She did as I asked. The fact that she was submitting to me already was just beautiful. She was smart enough to see that she was stuck here at my mercy. And she knew that fighting me only made things worse.

The buzz of the machine made her flinch. I gripped her thigh tightly, laughing a little at how tense she was. Trailing my hand further up, I spread her labia and brushed my thumb across her clit. She sucked in a sharp breath, but she didn’t look down at me. Acquiescence at its finest.

I swiped a cotton ball with alcohol over the area and she grunted. “What are you doing?”

“Maybe I want to pleasure you first.”

“What is that?”

Before she got freaked out enough to look, I pressed the needles just above her clit. Knowing she would lose her absolute shit, I pulled back quickly, just before she screamed and bucked her hips.

“What the fuck are you doing!” she shrieked.

“Jesus. Shut up and take a nap.”

“Take a nap? Are you fucking insane?”

“After everything I’ve done so far, do you have to ask that?”

She stared at me with an impressive amount of anger on her face. I cocked my head, then looked down and brought the machine closer.

“No!” she shouted.

“If you move, it’s going to hurt a hell of a lot worse. You’re not getting out of this, no matter what you do, and if you keep screaming, I’ll just fuck your throat until it’s too hoarse to make a sound. What’ll it be?”

“God,” she groaned. Her hands thrashed desperately, to no avail. After a few shuddering breaths, she dropped her head back. “Please just don’t.”

Parting her lips with two fingers, I touched her with the needles again. Another scream tore from her throat and it was clear she was trying to stay still, but she kept writhing.

“Please,” she cried. “Drug me or something. Fuck, please.”

Ignoring her, I continued. I had to move back often because of her shaking, but eventually, she settled into a constant state of trembling. She was sobbing the entire time. Little hiccups started to punctuate every breath.

“Almost done,” I told her.

The needles were at the very top of her clit and her wails picked up again. “I… h-hate… y-you.”

“I know, baby. We’ll get through that.”

When I finished the final line, I wiped away the blood, which drew another cry from her.

“That was the worst part. Apparently, the healing isn’t all that bad.”

She squeezed her eyes shut. I moved up the bed and brushed my thumbs over her cheeks. They were sticky with fresh and old tears, making some of her hair stick to her face. I pushed it back, then ran my hands down to her jaw.

Fuck, I wanted to kiss her.

Well, her hands were bound. While she wasn’t looking, I brought the mask up just enough to uncover my mouth. My lips pressed against hers softly and she immediately started to thrash. I gripped her jaw to keep her in place until she settled.

“Kiss me and I’ll leave.”

“Do you promise?” she whispered.

“If you kiss me like you’d kiss him, I promise I’ll leave.”

She tugged on the restraints to help her arch upward. This time, she stayed still when my lips moved against hers. The tension was obvious, but I didn’t care. For this moment, I wanted to pretend. This was what every part of me had been desperate for since I was fourteen. It was a long fucking time to wait for a kiss from the girl of your dreams. It didn’t matter that she wasn’t actually kissing me or that she hated every second of it. I’d been living in delusion for twelve years. This was easy.

Until I pulled away.

With my mask situated again, I looked down at her. She was staring at the window, completely checked out from the present.

“I’ll give you a week,” I said as I gathered my stuff.

“For what?” Her voice was hoarse and weak from her crying. If I was Jayce right now, I’d make her some tea and give her all the after care anyone could ever need.

“Before I come back to play with your pussy.”

“I won’t fucking be here.”

“Hm.”

I pulled out my phone. Before I came here, I took the case off so that she wouldn’t recognize it. I navigated to my gallery, then turned it around. Her eyes widened when she saw the picture of Jayce- me- in the garden. I scrolled, showing her one taken through my window while I read in bed.

“You’ll be where I want you to be. If not…”

She tugged fiercely on her restraints. “You can’t just take over my life.”

“Yet I have. Weren’t you listening before? I own you, Alana. Just look at your pussy.”

She blinked a few times, then looked down. “Untie me.”

“You’ll figure it out.”

Slinging my backpack over my shoulder, I walked out the door. She was still yelling after me when I entered the breezeway. Her voice was cracking and I knew that if she kept it up, she’d lose it. Imagine all the things I could do to her if she could no longer scream.

She deserved all of me, though. I wasn’t just the monster who stalked her, nor was I only the best friend who comforted and cared for her. I’d hurt her tonight and from the way she looked, I knew she needed someone to care for her before Erebus came back. She could break, but I needed it to be a clean break, otherwise she couldn’t heal right.

Chapter 21

Alana

My body fucking hurt. Not only was my vulva constantly throbbing and stinging, but my arms and legs were sore from the restraints. I’d been stuck in them for so long. Eventually, I fell asleep from my exhaustion. When I woke up, I was free with no trace of the ropes or spreader bar.

So, he’d been back. I didn’t even know if I felt unnerved by it anymore. I was either apathetic or the stupidest fucking bitch to ever exist.

I didn’t leave my bed except to pee, which had been a goddamn nightmare. I ended up finding a bottle I could use to rinse myself with water like people did after they gave birth. When I tried to look at what he’d tattooed, I couldn’t handle spreading myself. Once it healed, I’d endure whatever horror he must’ve marked me with.

Word of advice: don’t tattoo your goddamn genitals. Second word of advice: don’t let a psycho tattoo your goddamn genitals.

I heard the door open and my heart began to race. He was back. Fuck, he told me he was going to leave me alone. I kept telling myself to get up, but I didn’t have the will. Besides, where would I go? There was no way I could run this time, not that it did any good last time.

“Alana?”

My eyes closed. I didn’t know if I was happy or upset that he was here. When I didn’t respond, the bed dipped behind me. A strong arm came around me and I was flooded with his scent. It made my eyes burn. A tear escaped and he grabbed my face, turning it toward him.

His brows were tight as he studied me. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. It’s just one of those days.”

It was clear he didn’t believe me, but I wasn’t about to tell him that my masked stalker tattooed my pussy last night. He’d flip the fuck out and get himself killed trying to keep me safe. I wasn’t sure if the guy was going to eventually kill me, but I was past believing that anybody could save me from him.

“You’re not telling me something.”

“No, Jayce. Everything is fine. Why are you here anyway?”

“You missed our coffee date.”

“Fuck. I’m sorry.”

“It’s just coffee.”

“We can still go,” I offered, trying to make it sound like I wanted to. Sitting in a hard chair sounded like its own form of torture right now.

“No, you look like shit.”

Despite everything, I let out a small laugh. “Embarrassed to be seen with me?”

“Very. My reputation is everything to me.”

“Let me shower, then we can go eat. I know you can’t say no to sushi.”

His eyes lit up. “Bitch, you know the way to my heart.”

“Mm. I’ve known you for a while, you know.”

“Pretty sure there’s still a lot you don’t know about me.”

“Doubtful. Nothing about you could surprise me.”

There was a smirk playing on his mouth. His head cocked, then his tongue trailed over his lips. Just as quickly as it came, it was gone and he was on his feet.

“You got any milk?” he asked.

“Yeah, why?”

“Craving a glass. Go get your ass in the shower before I starve to death.”

Rolling my eyes, I stood up carefully. There was concern on his face, but he didn’t say anything as I walked to the bathroom. I already knew this shower was going to suck, but the tattoo needed to be cleaned anyway. If I ever managed to get Erebus restrained, I was going to tattoo his dick to look like a really ugly big toe. Then, I would cut it off.

The shower took longer than I expected. I had to hype myself up every step of the way. When I was finished, I carefully put on a pair of yoga pants with soft underwear. It was great how sensitive the clit was until a thousand needle pricks fucked it all up. I’d already looked up if it could cause permanent damage, which was unlikely according to Reddit. Some people actually did this willingly. Psychopaths.

The good thing was that it was like tattooing inside your mouth. It would fade a lot faster than a regular tattoo. Maybe it would hardly be noticeable someday. I couldn’t imagine the humiliation when I started dating again.

I didn’t even want to think about that. The idea of sleeping with someone made me nauseous.

I found Jayce lying on the couch with an arm behind his neck. His eyes were closed, but when he heard me, he tipped his head back to look at me.

“You look alive again.”

“Thanks,” I muttered. I grabbed my keys off the counter, then looked at the empty sink. “I thought you were going to have milk.”

“Didn’t want to ruin my appetite. Are you ready?”

“Sure, let’s go.” I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to stomach food, but I would try. Even though I couldn’t stand the thought of him knowing what had happened to me, Jayce was a comfort that I needed but had been too proud to seek out.

“Do you love him?”

I shuddered when the question came back to me in his voice. That accent had become the stuff of my nightmares.

*****

After a few pieces of sushi, I started to feel queasy. I drank my water slowly, hoping it would help. It didn’t because I was so focused on the pain in my crotch that I was nauseous.

Erebus branded me and the longer I dealt with this, the angrier I was about it.

Jayce put back so much sushi, I didn’t understand how he hadn’t burst at the seams. He was a big guy, but it still seemed excessive.

I stared at him, taking in his broad shoulders and tall frame. I had no idea what his gym schedule was, but maybe I should. He was clearly doing something right. With his jacket off, I had a view of his biceps, which bulged against the sleeves of his t-shirt. He had tattoos that came down to his elbows, leaving his forearms bare, and even though I was familiar with them, I’d never taken much time to study them.

How were his forearms muscular? Even his hands looked strong enough to crack a bitch’s neck.

An uncomfortable feeling settled in my gut. Jayce wouldn’t hurt me, but the fact that he could wasn’t sitting well with me right now. Erebus had a similar build and he carried me like a ragdoll. Turning to look around the restaurant, I found another man around the same size. For all I knew, it could be him. Maybe he was hiding in plain sight, blending in with the world, and I was just sitting here eating sushi.

I looked at Jayce again, who was now on his phone.

“What are you doing?”

He turned it around, showing me a picture. It was me, looking lost in thought. I frowned.

“Don’t take pictures of me.”

“Why not?”

My phone vibrated. Since Jayce was right here, there were only a few people it could be. With a deep breath, I pulled it out.

Erebus: Are you taking care of my pussy?

Alana: Fuck off.

Erebus: Careful. I have no issue coming over and tearing it to shreds. Letting you heal was me being generous.

I sucked in a breath, drawing Jayce’s attention. “You okay?”

“Yup.”

Erebus: Do we have a date or are you going to be a good girl for me?

Alana: I’m not a dog.

Erebus: The next time I tell you that you’re a good girl, your brain will be too scrambled to think something that dumb.

Alana: Who hurt you? I bet daddy didn’t love you. Maybe he touched you.

What, no snarky response?

You’re a weak piece of shit.

Dropping the phone, I looked at Jayce. He was smirking at his screen.

“Funny meme?” I asked.

He shook his head, then flipped the phone again. There was a video of a chimpanzee pacing back and forth, looking like it was deep in thought.

“I was thinking he might be contemplating the meaning of the universe,” Jayce said.

“Maybe he’ll give us the answer.”

“If only.”

His expression grew serious suddenly. I reached across the table and took his hand. “What is it?”

“I was texting my dad. They’re meeting with the attorney on Wednesday and… Well, they wanted to know if you would go with them. They think it’ll be easier if we’re all involved as one instead of separately.”

I was glad I hadn’t eaten any more sushi. “I don’t know.”

Getting to my feet, I dropped some cash on the table. Jayce picked it up, replaced it with his own, then stuffed mine in my pocket.

“Don’t start,” he murmured, throwing an arm around my shoulder and guiding me toward the exit.

“I hate you.”

“I know.”

Something about that made me feel off. Shaking away the feeling, I took a step to the side once we made it outside. Jayce dropped his arm, then pushed his hand into his pocket while we walked.

“Alana, I need to speak my mind.”

“Okay,” I said, laughing nervously. “You always can. You always do, actually.”

“This one is difficult.” Pulling me to a stop beside his Bronco, he took my hand.

“Jayce…”

“It’s about Alicia.”

I didn’t know if that was better or worse than what had been going through my mind. “Okay.”

“I fucking hate what Jake did to you. It’s inexcusable and it’s worse that he hid it. He was a coward, but I don’t want to be. Alicia is my niece and I want to be involved if I can.”

Pulling my hand away, I crossed my arms over my chest. “That’s your decision.”

“I found out that Jake was trying to get custody before he died. I don’t know why he didn’t tell anyone. Maybe he didn’t want to unless he was sure something would come of it.”

I stepped back to lean against the truck. Every day, it felt like I knew Jake less. There were so many secrets he kept. That was his fault, but I felt like shit about myself too because I’d been blind. How didn’t I know any of this? My ability to trust was sure going to take a hit.

“Alicia’s mom didn’t want her husband to have custody,” he went on. “They were getting a divorce. Since she left everything to Jake, her husband was in contact with him. That’s when he decided to seek custody. Alana, I don’t think she should be with her stepdad.”

“Then, do something about it.”

“I’m going to try.”

With a dry laugh, I pressed my fingers back against the car. “You gonna be a dad now, Jayce? You don’t want kids.”

“No, I’ll be an uncle and I’m not going to try for custody. My parents will, though. After what I told them, they’re going to talk to a family law attorney. It’s more than likely going to be a nightmare, but Jake’s lawyer thought he had a good chance, so I’m hoping they will too.”

“Alright, cool. Thanks for telling me.”

I swung the door open, but he grabbed me and turned me back around. “There’s another thing I need to tell you.”

“Do you run around in a mask in New York city and seek vigilante justice?”

He laughed, then covered his mouth and cleared his throat. “No. It’s about Alicia’s mom.”

“I don’t want to know, Jayce.”

“You need to know. Her mom was Hailey.”

Putting a hand on my chest, I struggled to draw in a breath. He moved closer and rubbed his hands up and down my arms.

All of my emotions morphed into anger. I shoved him backward and climbed into the vehicle, slamming the door before he could try to pull me out again. I brought my feet up to the seat and perched my chin on my knees as I stared out the front window.

Jayce got in the truck and started it without a word.

Hailey. Fucking Hailey.

“Before or after?” I asked.

“After.”

I ran my fingers through my hair, trying to keep from exploding or jumping out of the vehicle at sixty miles per hour. He reached over, but I immediately associated him with Jake and leaned away. It wasn’t something I could help. He had the same goddamn face. My mind had to torture me with that.

Jayce’s jaw ticked, but he returned his hand to the wheel. We drove in tense silence and neither of us attempted to break it. When he pulled into my apartment community, I didn’t even wait for him to stop. I jumped out, nearly falling over. He slammed on the brakes and called my name, but I ignored him.

It wasn’t until I was safely inside with the door locked that I acknowledged what was happening inside of me. With a scream, I threw my purse against the far wall. The contents spilled everywhere and it made me pause. I knelt on the floor beside it and moved my wallet, finding a Hershey’s kiss there. I pulled out my phone, fueled by pure rage at this point.

Alana: Stay the fuck away from me. If I see you, I will fucking kill you.

Erebus: Lol.

My grip tightened on the phone. I didn’t respond and he didn’t send anything else. After an hour, I navigated to his contact and blocked him. I should’ve done it a while ago, but we were here now.

Would it do any good? Of fucking course not, but it made me feel better for a moment.

Chapter 22

Alana

Did I want to be here? No, but Ron and Sara needed my support. They lost their son only a year ago and now they were dealing with this. I wasn’t the only one.

When I walked into the office, Luna smiled brightly. “Miss Weste, it’s nice to see you again.”

“It’s Monroe,” I corrected.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Slip of the tongue.”

I fought the urge to roll my eyes. At one point, being called that would have made my stomach flutter instead of triggering nausea.

“They’re already back there,” she said. “Do you remember which office?”

“Yeah, thanks.”

Rubbing my sweaty hands on my jeans, I walked down the hall, then knocked on the door. Carl Moore opened it and offered me a polite smile, gesturing me inside. I awkwardly slid past him and looked at the couch. Charlie and Sara were seated close together on one side, Jayce was beside them, and Ron was in an armchair. The group on the couch squeezed closer together to make room.

I sat beside Jayce, who smiled warmly. “You good?”

“Mhm.”

Crossing one leg over the other, I tried to lean further into the arm of the couch. It made me wince from the sharp sting between my legs. It still hurt like a bitch, but it had dulled slightly. Now, the damn thing had added itchiness as my arch nemesis. I couldn’t scratch it and even if I could, that wasn’t a socially acceptable thing to do in public.

Didn’t they have a conference room they could do this in? Carl’s office felt more like a place to tell a professional why your brain was fucked up.

“Thanks for coming,” Sara whispered loudly, reaching over to squeeze my shoulder.

“Of course. You guys are family.”

I looked at Carl and waited for him to start speaking. When he did, I had a hard time staying present. A lot of this made little sense to me and even the parts that did were confusing. It sounded like so much work and I didn’t know why it had to be so complicated. Frankly, I wasn’t sure why the stepdad wasn’t an easy choice, considering he’d raised her.

It was selfish of me to wish they’d just let that happen, but I couldn’t help feeling that way at times. I wanted them to have this, I really did. The problem was that I didn’t know how I would handle it if they did get custody, even partial.

It wasn’t Alicia’s fault, obviously. That didn’t change the fact that she was a product of my fiancé sticking it in my ex best friend. And it was after everything that happened with her. That was beyond a betrayal. I knew that she’d died, but I didn’t even think to associate her with Jake in any way. It was unfathomable that he would sleep with her.

Apparently, I was once again blind to what my relationship with Jake was really like. Someone who really loved you didn’t cheat on you. They didn’t lie about so many things. They didn’t try to win custody of a child their fiancé knew nothing about without bringing it up first.

Jayce dipped his head close to my ear. “I can tell you’re losing it right now. Breathe.”

Ignoring him, I fidgeted in my seat. It was so uncomfortable with all of us here. Every time I moved, his elbow jabbed into my ribs. When he noticed, he put his arm over the back of the couch.

“Anything to add to that, Alana?”

I looked at Carl in surprise. “What?”

“We were discussing the reasons why the Westes would be better suited to control Alicia’s estate.”

“No, I think you covered everything.”

Ron frowned, which made me feel bad. I hadn’t been listening, so I had no idea what they’d even covered.

“Sorry,” I backtracked. “My head is sort of jumbled.”

“Well,” Carl started, leaning forward. “With the addition of the Westes, the circumstances of the divorce proceedings, and the mother’s wishes made clear before her death, it could be a simple case. The issue is the lack of any prior relationship. I think it’s in their best interest to proceed with seeking guardianship while we’re dealing with this. It’ll show their interest in being a permanent part of Alicia’s life and that they have her best interests in mind. The fact that none of you were aware that Mr. Weste had a daughter works in your favor because there was no intent to avoid a relationship. As for the specifics of seeking guardianship or visitation, you’d have to speak to someone who specializes in that area.”

“What do you need from me? Just say it and I’m game.”

“You’ve known the family for a long time and you’re not biologically related. You can speak on their character, as well as substantiate their claim of ignorance regarding their granddaughter.”

“Okay,” I said with a slow nod. That was something I could do and it wouldn’t be difficult. All I had to do was tell the truth.

He started going on about real property and personal property- something about land Hailey’s family had owned in Wyoming for generations. It wasn’t important to me. Whatever she did or didn’t have when she died didn’t matter. I had no idea how much money was left to Alicia between her parents, nor did I care to. The real, human life involved was the only thing that kept me in my seat the entire time. When he finally said he’d see us on a date I hadn’t paid attention to, I said quick goodbyes and rushed out the door.

I knew that I’d come across as rude today, but I was so tired. Mentally, emotionally, and physically. Ever since Halloween, I’d been sleeping worse than ever. When I was awake, I constantly looked over my shoulder. I knew I was being watched, but I couldn’t figure out how or where. It was the most nerve-racking experience and it never ended.

When I got into my car, I saw Jayce heading toward me. I loved the guy, but couldn’t he leave me alone just once? I didn’t want to be around people all the time. Meeting his eyes, I shook my head and backed out of the spot. He didn’t look happy, but he’d be fine. If he really wanted to, he could show up at my place. It seemed to be everyone’s modus operandi these days anyway.

Since I was out of milk and a few other things, I pulled into the parking lot of a store near my apartment. I hurried inside, not bothering to grab a basket. If I did, it would only make me buy more.

After I grabbed the milk, I cradled it in my elbow while I went down a couple of aisles, remembering more things I needed. Now that I thought about it, I couldn’t recall the last time I’d actually grocery shopped. I’d been doing exactly this- picking things up here and there. I wasn’t going to do it now, so I cut myself off and went to the checkout line. My arms were so full that I just had to dump everything on the self-checkout counter before I began scanning.

Something touched my shoulder and I shrieked, whirling around to meet wide eyes. “Jesus, Preston. Don’t come up behind people like that.”

“Sorry,” he said, looking abashed.

“It’s fine.” Turning back to the machine, I quickly scanned the rest of the items. After I paid, I offered him a smile and hurried to the parking lot. I moved my foot underneath the back and the trunk opened.

I was aware that he’d followed me, but I hoped he would get the hint and leave. He should have gotten the hint when I left that date so abruptly. He was either stupid or one of those men. I feared it was the latter.

“Let me help you with those,” he offered, reaching for the bags.

I took a step to the side. “I’m okay, thanks.”

“Just trying to be nice, Lana.”

“We don’t have nicknames, Preston. Look, I just need to get home, okay?”

His jaw clenched before he moved closer. “Are you free this weekend? I can get reservations for dinner.”

Oh, lord have fucking mercy.

“No, sorry.”

“Wow. I didn’t take you for one of those kinds of girls.”

With a tight-lipped smile, I closed the trunk. “I’m sorry for whatever you think about me.”

When I rounded the car, he latched onto my wrist. I shook him off with a glare. He held his hands up placatingly and took a step back.

“I’m just trying to talk to you,” he said. “You left in the middle of our date and said you’d call, but you didn’t. That’s a juvenile move.”

I wasn’t sure what to say to that, so I remained silent. Sure, it wasn’t my best moment, but I wasn’t beating myself up over it either.

“Don’t you think that’s fucked up?” he went on.

“It doesn’t give you the right to harass me in the parking lot.”

“Harass? Of course you’d say something like that. This is why I don’t usually date widows. You’re so self-absorbed and expect everyone to cater to your every need.”

“That’s uncalled for. You need to leave.”

“Yeah, yeah. Good luck in your dating life, Alana. Hopefully you offer something better than your personality.”

“Are you a fucking child?” I shouted, throwing my arms in the air. “Who talks to someone like this?”

He walked away, leaving me there alone with what I imagined was smoke coming out of my ears. With the anger came tears. Not wanting the family unloading from their mini van to see me cry, I got in the car and slammed the door.

Preston’s words would have rolled right off of me not too long ago. I was confident enough and happy for the most part. After a year of depression and grief combined with the betrayal and fear I’d suffered recently, the words hit me so deeply that it felt like I’d actually been struck.

My tears had just started to fall rapidly when it felt like someone was watching me. With my skin prickling and my senses on high alert, I glanced through every window, but there was nobody around except for a few people heading into the store.

Not interested in lingering, I started the car and headed toward home. It wasn’t safe there either and it didn’t feel like there was anything I could do about it. After thinking about it for a moment, I went in the opposite direction. I refused to be some statistic- a woman killed by her stalker.

If I could, I would buy a gun, but the state required a license for it and from what I’d heard, it could take forever. A knife might do just as well in this case. I knew he’d be close enough to stab when he came for me again.

Chapter 23

Jayce

A few weeks ago, I claimed that I wasn’t a murderer. With a few exceptions, of course. Well, apparently that wasn’t my final form.

As I paced the length of my basement, I squeezed my eyes shut, then opened them again. There were too many goddamn things going on in my head. Part of me screamed to go check on Alana and comfort her. Another part begged to be released upon her like a demon freed to wreak havoc on the world. A very loud part of me was committed to getting rid of the trash I had down here.

“Will you stop pacing?” he snapped.

I turned to him with a raised brow. Preston was sitting up, strapped to a hospital bed I bought off of Facebook Marketplace a while back. Why? You never know when you might need it and these things were versatile. I could lay him back or keep him like this, plus it was easy to strap someone down. They worked well for long or short stays and were easy enough to clean.

Maybe my mental state had been in a weird place for a while, but this was the first time I’d used the bed, so that counted for something.

“It’s ballsy to make demands in your position,” I noted, coming to stand in front of him. He tugged on the restraints, which was useless.

“It’s 2024, asshole. People get caught so fast for this kind of shit.”

“Do they?”

“Someone is already on their way here. They’ll track my phone.”

“The one I smashed and threw in the river when we crossed the bridge heading out of the city before circling back?”

His confidence wavered, but he attempted to maintain his fierce expression. I hadn’t liked him when he took Alana on that godawful date and I especially didn’t like him now. When I put him in the bed, I made sure to fuck up his combover, which was satisfying to look at.

“Cool. Now that we’ve established that…” I grabbed a chair and swung it around to sit in front of him. I leaned forward, perching my elbows on the backrest. “We have a problem, Preston.”

“How do you know who I am? Is this some trafficking thing?”

My nose wrinkled. “If it was, I would’ve thrown you in the river too. You wouldn’t be worth the fifty bucks I’d get for you.”

“Fuck you. You’re a crazy bastard.”

“You’re right. I’d probably have to pay them to take you off my hands. It’s not worth the trouble, if I’m being honest, so what should I do with you?”

“I don’t want to play whatever weird game you’ve concocted.”

Tutting at him, I ran my fingers over the smooth metal of the chair. “I play games, true, but this isn’t one of those times. With Alana, I fucking love to play.”

His mouth dropped open. “You’re kidding. This is about the girl? Jesus. Look, I don’t give a shit about her. If she’s your girlfriend or somethin’, I’d tell you to move on, but that’s on you. I won’t talk to her again.”

“Mm. I’m actually annoyed with her.”

“That’s what I’m saying.” His voice had reached an annoyingly loud volume and there was a smile on his face. He thought we were bonding over shared disdain for a woman now.

“Annoyance isn’t nearly strong enough to take me away from Alana. She could cut me open and spill my intestines in the street. I’d still profess my love with my dying breath. Maybe I love her enough to take her to the grave with me. You never really know until it happens, I’m sure. Do you think Heathcliff knew he’d lose his damn mind and lie in Catherine’s grave with her? Bet he didn’t.”

Preston appeared confused. His eyes moved to various parts of the room, pausing on a few things. A shovel. A toolbox. Gardening equipment. Weapons he thought he could use if he broke free, I imagine.

Standing, I moved to the side of the bed. “Of all the days you had to act like a dick, you chose today. You made her cry, Preston.”

I flipped open my pocket knife and poised it at his throat. He sucked in a sharp breath. When he started to shake his head, the blade pricked his skin and he went still.

“And here’s the thing,” I went on. “A few weeks ago, I would have let it slide. Maybe I’d rough you up a bit if I was feeling bold that day, but now…” I blew out a breath, puffing my cheeks as I did so. “I’ve tasted her. I’ve marked her. I made her cum so beautifully. You should’ve fucking seen it, Preston. Although, then I’d have to take your eyes.”

He squeezed them shut, drawing in shuddering breaths now. With each one, the blade dug in a little further and put him in a predicament. Breathe or keep his throat intact. His survival instincts must have been fighting like mad for a solution.

“As it stands, I only need to take your tongue for what you said to her, but this isn’t fiction. I can’t just do that, then let you go. I don’t have the type of resources it’d take to keep you quiet. That leaves me one choice.”

“Please,” he gritted out.

“I don’t bargain. You should know that about me. I’m very committed to getting the things that I want. It’s why I’ve protected her for so long. It’s why I killed my twin fucking brother. You think you’re above him and can earn my mercy?”

There it was. The finality, the fear that was unlocked when someone really discovered that they were completely fucked. Death was scary, but torture was sickening to think about. I wondered which one he feared more.

“You don’t have to kill me,” he insisted.

“I kinda do.”

“B-but why? I’ll leave her alone.”

“Mostly, it’s because you’re an asshole. I also need more fertilizer.”

“W-hat?”

I nodded toward the far end of the room. He squinted his eyes, but there was no sign that he knew what he was looking at.

“It’s a composting vessel,” I explained. “The body goes in, it’s cocooned with natural, biodegradable material that will help it to break down, and it’s kept at the perfect temperature through the different phases of the process. If you do it right, it can take less than two months. It’s the perfect way to get rid of a body in its entirety. I can grind down the bones into a powder and add it to the rest, then you become food for my garden. It’s the circle of life,” I sang loudly, throwing my arms out with a wide smile.

“Oh, god, you’re really going to kill me.”

“Yeah,” I sighed. “I am.” I pushed on the back of his elbow so that his arm straightened. When I made a shallow slice, just enough for it to hurt like a bitch when he moved his arm, he screamed as if I’d stabbed him. “Jesus, you can howl. I’m gonna call you fucking Balto.”

“Please, I w-won’t talk to her again. I won’t talk to any woman in the fucking world if that’s what you want.”

Leaning on the raised arm of the bed, I tapped the blade against the hard plastic. “Here’s the problem. You are what I might call an incel, or close to one. Clearly, you think women owe you something. They don’t. That thing in your pants…” I pointed at it with the knife, which made him tense. “I’ve got one too. Am I harassing women who don’t want to date me? Am I acting like having a Y chromosome somehow makes me better than them? Fuck no, I’m not.”

I paused to consider my words. Alana wasn’t some random woman and it was different. She hadn’t contacted the cops again or told me about her stalker since the time she saw me on the deck. I tattooed her fucking clit, yet she still texted me back. She’d since blocked me, but that would be remedied soon enough. She was curious enough to land herself in a position to let me in just a little bit more every time I saw her.

“So, yeah, as I was saying, you are who you are. If it takes me threatening your life for you to decide you can suddenly be a decent person and treat women like equals, then you’re a lost cause. Anyone will change their tune when they’re tortured.”

“T-tortured?”

“I want you to know that I’m not doing this because I enjoy it. It’s just how things have to be.”

Keeping his arm straight, I dug the blade into the front of his shoulder. When he thrashed, I tightened the strap around his chest and held on tighter. The knife cut through with more ease than I’d expected and when it met more resistance, I lessened the pressure. I started to drag it further down, making one long slice from shoulder to wrist.

As the sides split from each other, I imagined it was a grotesque flower beginning to bloom. It was fitting since he would be feeding my garden soon.

Blood dripped onto the floor, covering my bare feet. Both of those could be washed since I’d installed seamless marble across the entire space. Whereas concrete was too porous to risk blood splatter, this was functional.

He screamed for me to stop and when I moved to the other arm, he became incoherent. He was blubbering, crying, praying, cursing me.

“Relax. It’s not deep enough for you to bleed out. If you hadn’t made her cry, I would’ve made this easier for you,” I noted, moving toward his lower body.

His eyes were heavy, so I decided to forego the legs. I ripped open the front of his pants and cut them a little further down to give me more room. With renewed vigor, he bucked on the bed.

“Don’t touch me. Don’t fucking touch me with that.”

I reached into my pocket and pulled out a pair of gloves. I already had his blood on me, but this was different. This required a buffer, otherwise it felt wrong.

“Dick or balls?” I asked.

“No, no, no. Stop, please. Oh, god, help me.”

“It doesn’t really matter which goes first. I say dick. You might pass out after and I really want you to feel that one the most. It’s a good thing you’ve stayed hard throughout this. I bet you were wondering why. Or were you not thinking about your dick for once?”

He stared at it in horror. “W-what…”

“Just blue pills, nothing to worry about. The amount I gave you might be fatal, but I needed to make sure it’d work and, well, you’re not getting out of here anyway.”

He was muttering nonsense again. I grabbed the middle of his shaft, grimacing the whole time. I never thought I’d touch a man’s dick, let alone his rock solid one. And if I did, it wouldn’t be like this.

When the cold steel touched him, he started screaming bloody fucking murder. I just wanted to get it over with at this point, so I swiped it downward, then back up in a sawing motion. I didn’t think there was a way for a man to do this without feeling a bit queasy. It sent a shudder through me, but I soldiered on.

Halfway through, Preston passed out, so I dropped his dick. It flopped over and I thought it’d tear the rest of the way off, but it just hung there limply. I used smelling salts to wake him and he jolted for a moment but then passed out again.

I didn’t have the patience for it, so I grabbed his hanging shaft and yanked on it hard enough to rip the other half free. That woke him up. His breaths were shallow and rapid, his eyes wide, and I wondered if the pain was great enough that he couldn’t scream anymore. Maybe he was in shock or something. I didn’t dare look these things up, considering what I was doing in my basement right now.

The balls didn’t really matter and I was tired of touching his junk, so I tossed the dick stub at him. It hit him in the eye and he let out a little cry. It fell into his lap, which would become its final resting place.

Gripping the handle of the knife tighter, I drove it into his trachea. When I pulled it free, blood gushed out. It covered his chest like an apron and his eyes rolled back.

This was the bloodiest, most gruesome thing I’d ever done. And I’d done it because he made Alana cry. Fuck, being without her was just driving me more insane by the day. I wanted her, I needed her.

Three more days, then it would be Saturday. I’d promised her a week. How would I get her to trust me if I didn’t abide by my word?

Chapter 24

Jayce

I meant to go inside earlier, but I was stuck just staring up at her window. From across the lot, she probably hadn’t spotted me. If she had, she didn’t make it known. For so long, this was all I did. I’d watch from outside when she was awake and come inside when she slept. There was comfort in it, a familiarity that ran deep.

With how content I was, I almost chose not to go up there but suddenly, she was at the living room window. The curtains parted and she peered out, looking left and right. After a minute, she disappeared.

Was she looking for me? If she was expecting me to follow through, I was surprised she’d stayed put, regardless of my threats. I was almost offended she didn’t think I- the real me- could defend myself against some dude in a mask. I’d kick my own ass without a problem.

Since I was curious, I stayed outside. The light in the living room eventually turned off. It was already close to midnight, which seemed pretty late for her to start getting ready to relax in her room. A shadow moved in her bedroom window, then she was looking outside again.

Well, I’ll be damned. I was sure it had to do with fear of my return, but she didn’t look all that scared. She crossed her arms over her chest as she continued to scan the lot. When she disappeared, I got to my feet.

My phone buzzed, surprising me.

Alana: If I go to sleep, can I trust that nobody will wake me up?

I couldn’t contain the grin that rose on my face. Keeping the phone in my hand, I crossed over to her building and quietly climbed the stairs, only to receive another text.

Alana: I’ll take that as a yes. Thanks for the prompt response, asshole.

God, she was starved for attention. She wouldn’t accept what she needed from the real me and it seemed that it was bleeding over into her relationship with this version, even if she didn’t recognize that yet. She was clinging to the pain I caused her, but it was clouded by other things.

Orgasms could be forced, sure, but she’d been shocked by what she felt and I was sure it stuck with her. I kept coming back, showing her that I was committed to whatever this was. I claimed her in a fucked up and downright possessive way, but something about that made her feel confused. She thought she wasn’t telling me more about the stalker because she wanted to protect me, but I was the one she called when he first showed up. Why did that change?

Cue Finding Nemo sharks: Denial.

She wanted someone to make her feel better after my brother wrecked her confidence. Because she’d been with him for so long, she didn’t let herself address her needs that hadn’t been fulfilled. She became happy with being comfortable. If she’d do some introspection, she’d recognize that she needed far more than that. She always had.

I leaned against the outside of her apartment with my thumbs hovering over the screen.

Erebus: You could always pretend to be asleep. That way everybody wins.

Alana: Oh yeah. You enjoy ripping me from my dreams and plunging me straight into your nightmare.

Erebus: I’m busy tonight. Sorry to disappoint.

The dots came and went multiple times. I pulled up my app to see what was going on from her end.

Good. Fuck you. Erase.

Cool. Back to blocked. Erase.

What the fuck are you hiding behind your mask? Erase.

I got a knife and I’m gonna stab you. Erase.

In the end, she exited out of the message without sending anything. She navigated to her music app and started it. I waited a few minutes before I unlocked the door. The sound of the shower greeted me, the perfect cover for my entrance.

My hand hovered above the knob to the bathroom. I couldn’t do much there if I was going to stay in my clothes, which I had to. She may not recognize my body when I was dressed, but my tattoos would give me away and she’d seen me shirtless many times, so that alone could trigger recognition.

I bypassed the bathroom. Instead, I kicked off my shoes and started going through her drawers. The knife wasn’t in any of them. When I checked her purse, I didn’t find it there either. I laid on her bed with my back propped up with the pillows, hoping she didn’t have it with her in the bathroom. She could rush in and jump on me with it.

If she wanted to stab me, where would she stash it so that it’d be accessible? I reached under the pillow and smiled. Clever, but not clever enough. I slipped it into my pocket before I settled into a more comfortable position and stared up at the ceiling.

When the shower turned off, I grabbed my bag and moved into the closet. Positioning myself behind some hanging clothes in the corner, I waited. She was humming when she returned to the room. Through the gaps in my hiding spot, I watched her twirl in her towel, then rummage around in her drawers. She tossed sleep shorts onto the bed and started to untuck her towel when she froze, staring at the boots I’d left by the door.

She took a step back and looked to the sides. I pulled out my phone to send her a message, making sure that I was tucked into the corner enough that she wouldn’t see me.

Erebus: Hide & seek. You find me, you get rewarded.

She jumped when her phone buzzed. After reading it, she put her fingers over her mouth, looking deep in thought.

Shaking her head, she picked up her shorts. I rapped my knuckles on the wall twice and she froze again. She spun in a circle, trying to pinpoint where she’d heard it. Her gaze moved to her pillow, then to the closet. She knew I could see her, which made her question her next move.

If she was smart, she’d maintain the element of surprise. If she was smarter, she’d get dressed and fucking run.

I smiled when she took a tentative step toward the closet. She poked her head in and I could hear her panicked breaths. I wondered if she was wet right now from the fear. It was an effort not to jump out. All she had to do was turn on the light and she’d see my socked feet.

“Erebus?” she called softly. The tremor in her voice was so alluring, so fucking sweet. She took another step into the closet. “You said you weren’t coming.”

Her fingers ran over some of the clothes, displacing them, but she was on the wrong side. While she was facing away from me, I carefully squeezed through so that I didn’t jostle the hangers. When I was right behind her, her shoulders rose. Grabbing onto her waist, I turned and pushed her against the wall. Her hands came up to brace herself so that her face didn’t slam into it.

“Erebus,” she gasped.

“Mm.” I trailed my fingers around to her front and slipped them inside the towel. Flattening my palms on her stomach, I dipped my head. “My name on your lips makes me wonder if this is all a dream.”

“P-please let me go.”

“You sought me out.”

“What else was I supposed to do? Wait for you to jump out or let you watch me?”

“Run,” I suggested. She was silent and I laughed. “Didn’t think of that?”

“You would’ve caught me.”

“Maybe, maybe not. You’re capable of winning a round once in a while.” I pressed my hips forward and she sucked in a breath. “Since I won, what’s my prize?”

While I waited, I moved my hand up her torso. My fingers brushed her nipple, making her stiffen further. When I reached the top of the towel, I untucked it and let it fall at our feet.

“You lied,” she whispered.

“And why would you even consider trusting me?”

More silence. I lightly pinched both of her nipples and her forehead fell against the wall.

“You’re wet for me, aren’t you, Alana?” She shook her head. “If you are, will you hate yourself?” A nod. “Will you hate me?”

“I do.”

“That’s a half-truth.” Keeping my palm pressed against her skin, I moved my hand further down. She shook her head, but I ignored her. “I think you’re overcome by a morbid curiosity that you’re desperate to satisfy.”

“You’re a monster,” she gritted out.

“I can be if you’re into that.”

Her legs were squeezed tightly, but I managed to get my hand between them. My finger rubbed on the tattoo, which made her yelp. I moved to her entrance and pushed inside to my first knuckle.

“Look at that,” I murmured. “You are into it.”

“No. It’s a natural response.”

“Sure, but you were wet before I even touched you. Weren’t you?”

“Please don’t… No.”

She cut off the sound that attempted to come free when I pushed deeper. Pinning her more firmly against the wall, I added a second finger while I stimulated her nipple with my other hand. She was tense, fighting me, but her breaths were becoming increasingly quicker and she couldn’t hide the barely perceptible whimpers.

When her pussy began to contract, I moved my hand from her breast to grip her throat, then removed my fingers and brought them to her lips.

“Tell me how good your cunt tastes.”

She didn’t budge, so I tightened my grip, taking away her air. She bucked against me but when she accepted that she wouldn’t be able to free herself, she opened her mouth. I shoved my ring and middle finger inside and her head dropped back onto my shoulder. I eased up on her throat, stroking it instead.

“I want to make you my whore, Alana.”

With a grunt, she turned her face to the side. I brought the fingers coated in her saliva and arousal to my own mouth and sucked on them with a groan. The way her body trembled spoke less of fear and more of burning desire.

“You didn’t win, so you don’t get a prize.”

I spun her around and grabbed onto her biceps to walk her backwards toward the bed. The backs of her thighs hit the mattress and she dropped into it. I stared down at her, trying to decide if I wanted to take her mouth or her pussy. The way she stared up at me made the former sound like a good option.

“Lie down.” I jerked my chin upward. She shook her head. “Do we need to have a lesson on who’s in charge here?”

With a huff, she crawled backward. She settled on the pillow, her chest rising and falling heavily. I licked my lips as I stared at her hard nipples. My knees dropped to the bed and her eyes were intent on me the entire time I approached. I used both hands to push her legs apart. Her pussy glistened from me fingering her and no doubt the fresh arousal born of her vulnerability in this position.

“Are you going to fuck me?” she whispered.

I looked up at her face. She moved her arms above her, then tucked them underneath the pillow. When she arched her hips, I leaned forward and slung her legs over my forearms. She was shaking like a leaf. I felt trapped by her this time, sucked into her own game. And it was a game; of that, I was sure.

Her expression wavered as her hand continued to move underneath the pillow. Pushing her knees to her chest, I thrust my hips forward. My jeans rubbed against her, causing a pained sound to escape her lips. As my cock hardened further, I continued making a grinding motion, forcing her to become desperate for her escape, enough so that she gave herself away.

She dug around beneath the pillow, searching for her means of escape, the whole reason she’d allowed me this close without a fight. I reached into my pocket and pulled out the knife, flipping it open. Her lips parted and a fresh wave of fear clouded her eyes.

“Wait,” she pleaded.

“Duplicitous, not clever. Did you intend to stab me? Kill me, perhaps?”

“N-no, I just… I wouldn’t…”

I dropped her legs and braced myself beside her head. “Let me spell this out for you, Alana.” Latching onto her throat, I dragged the blade over her cheek gently. “Even God cannot kill the devil. What made you think you could?”

“Please, Erebus, I’m sorry. Fuck, I’m sorry.”

Moving the blade to her lips, I traced them with the tip. She was deathly still, her eyes locked on my face. “Open.”

Tears brimmed as she parted her lips. The edge scraped against her tooth as I pushed it inside. I ran the flat of it over her tongue, slowly moving it deeper. The beginning of a sob was building in her throat, but she fought it off to keep herself from moving.

“Suck on it.”

Her eyes squeezed shut and she closed her lips around the blade. My cock throbbed when her cheeks hollowed. I could feel the movement tug on the knife.

“Would you have gone for the neck? Or would you want to watch me suffer for longer? Maybe you’d want to remove my cock. It’s not as satisfying as you might think, although it might be different for you. Don’t move.”

I pulled the knife toward me, letting it slide through her lips. Her hands went to my thighs and she dug her fingers in. Fear had her in a chokehold, forcing her to hold onto the very person who was causing it.

“Look how compliant you are now. So fucking good for me.”

When the tip was barely inside of her mouth, I pushed the blade in again. She made a sound of dissent, but I ignored her. Right now, she knew better than to try anything.

“Would you rather this be my cock?”

Her lips trembled and her eyes traveled to the ceiling. After a moment, she moved her hands inward. She got the button on my jeans undone before she met my eyes.

“Open.”

When she did, I removed the knife from her mouth. She took a gasping breath, letting the sobs take over now that the danger was gone.

“Just get it over with,” she muttered.

Instead of that dumb idea, I scooted backward and used my fingers to part her labia. The tattoo wasn’t inflamed like it was after I put it there, so it was easier to make out the letters that created an arch from the left, above her clit, and to the right.

“Have you looked at it?” I asked.

“Never.”

With a chuckle, I touched her clit with the metal. She jolted and her breaths picked up again.

“Please stop hurting me.”

“Have I hurt you? You look okay to me.”

“You tattooed my clit!”

“And it looks so lovely,” I said, giving it a little tap with the flat of the blade. “If anyone ever dares to touch you, they’ll know you already belong to someone else.”

“You…” She set her jaw and glared at the wall, then returned her gaze to me. “Is it your name?”

I smiled, even though she couldn’t see it. Using the knife, I strummed against her clit. It was a single bevel knife, which gave me a perfect way to use it without hurting her. I wasn’t sure why she’d chosen one like this. Maybe to slice off my cock.

When I swiped my thumb over her, she slammed her hands into the mattress.

“Please, it hurts,” she cried.

“I know it does. So, a choice. I can hurt you like this until you cum- because you will cum, regardless of what you think. Or I can fuck you. Same result, but it might not hurt as much.”

“You don’t get to fuck me,” she growled.

I applied firm pressure, making her let out a strangled cry. She squirmed as I continued, caught between warring sensations.

“Why didn’t you go to the police again?” I asked, continuing my movements.

“Scared,” she rasped, then pursed her lips to smother a moan.

“But not of what I’ll continue doing to you.”

“You can hurt me. Not them.”

“How noble. I saw you looking for me tonight.”

Her eyes snapped to mine. “When there’s a monster on the loose, you keep watch.”

“Haven’t we established that monsters turn you on?”

I leaned down off the side of the bed to reach into my backpack. When I pulled out a black blindfold, she shook her head.

“I told you to stop telling me no.”

“That’s how consent works,” she spat.

“I don’t need your consent when I own your fucking soul.”

Flipping her onto her stomach, I put the leather over her eyes. I lifted her hair to situate the strap so that she wouldn’t be able to get it off without effort, which would allow me ample time to stop her.

Wearing the mask wasn’t an issue for me and I enjoyed playing this part, but one thing I wouldn’t do was fuck her for the first time without being able to use my mouth for whatever I wanted. I wanted to fuck her as me, whether she knew it or not.

This moment right here was the one that would completely secure my place in a hell of my own creation. It was going to tie the essence of my very soul to hers, ensuring that I was completely incapable of letting her escape me, no matter what it cost either of us.

Chapter 25

Alana

Without my sight, I expected to fly into a panic. I was certainly freaked out, but I didn’t move. I didn’t try to strike at him or escape. With the deprivation, I was completely focused on what I could feel and hear, which was currently his zipper. There were goosebumps all over my skin that hadn’t gone away since he brought the blindfold out.

I reached up to touch the leather. It was tight but not too uncomfortable. If I tried to get it off, he’d be able to stop me, so I just ran my fingers over it for a moment before I dropped them back to the bed.

He chuckled, which might have scared me more than anything else. This was wrong. I should’ve been fighting him. He hurt me on multiple occasions, hunted me, threatened the people in my life. He was dangerous. And my entire body felt like it was on fire because of it.

I knew I was a little messed up in the head. It came with having a shitty childhood, probably. Maybe I could’ve counteracted it in therapy or something, but I never had an interest in going. My past didn’t haunt me and I didn’t even know if it was the actual cause of the things that went through my head.

It didn’t matter. I’d brought it up to Jake a few times, only to feel gross for doing it. I talked to him about CNC and he said it was sick. When I wanted him to use my body like I was just a hole to fuck, he looked at me like I was insane. He thought I wasn’t satisfied with our sex life. I was, but that didn’t mean I hadn’t thought about new things. It wasn’t wrong, but I refused to argue about it with him.

This, though… This was fucking wrong. I’d really lost my mind after losing Jake, along with everything else that had happened recently. This had to be some symptom of my depression. Apathy? The complete collapse of my mental faculties? Something.

There was pressure on my abdomen as he gripped me and turned me onto my back. His hands moved up my body slowly. My heart raced from the contact.

Stupid, stupid, stupid. Danger. I should be running, not arching into his touch.

Warmth and wetness touched my nipple and I fisted the sheets. His mask was gone. The blindfold made more sense now. What’d he look like without it?

My fingertips touched the sides of his face, making him stop moving. How did blind people recognize a face by touch? I had no idea how to conceptualize the structure in my mind. His cheekbones were sharp and his skin was soft, except for the stubble on his jaw. Strong bone structure. Full lips. I didn’t feel anything strange like scars or mutilation that I could use to somehow turn myself off from this. He had to be ugly. That was the only option I’d accept.

He turned his face to kiss my palm, then bit down on the ball of my thumb. Taking my wrist, he moved my hand to his chest. It met bare skin over solid muscle. The idea of him being naked reignited my fear as I thought about what that meant.

He was going to fuck me. No, I didn’t want that. I had to do something. He’d assaulted me already, but this…

“Hey,” he cooed, putting a hand on my cheek. “Calm down.”

“I’m scared.”

“Do you think I’m going to hurt you?” His lips touched the front of my throat just as his dick nudged against me. I had the urge to bend my knees, but that wasn’t the right response, so I stayed still.

“I don’t know,” I admitted.

“Are you more afraid of me hurting you or making you want more?”

When he moved his hips, he slid through my slit. The sting from the tattoo made me gasp, but it was combined with the pressure on my clit as he continued to move back and forth. When he spread my wetness, it burned a little and I clenched my teeth.

“You can’t answer,” he murmured, trailing his lips across my jaw. “Maybe you want me to help you find out.”

A sharp ache erupted in my lower lip from his teeth. I turned my face away and focused on my breathing. He diverted to my breasts- biting, licking, and sucking on my skin. I couldn’t help it; I grabbed the back of his head to hold him there while he created suction around my nipple.

I hadn’t had an orgasm in so long before he tied me up two weeks ago. The sort of desperation I felt now was powerful. It was just a consequence of him stimulating my body, but it was still undeniable.

Suddenly, he pulled back. He wasn’t touching me at all and it made me ache.

“You want me to leave, right?” His voice was soft yet filled the space around me dangerously.

I wasn’t sure what to say. My mouth opened, but no sound came out.

“Tell me to leave and I will.”

“Leave.”

It was silent for a moment, then his weight disappeared from the bed. I heard his backpack unzip and there was some rustling. Heavy footsteps receded into the hallway. I sat up straight, trying to rally my senses.

“Wait.”

His steps paused. What was I doing? He was going to leave. In what fucking world would I ask a man who intended to rape me to stay? If I did that, was I consenting? More importantly, if I changed my mind, would he respect that? Doubtful, which meant that this was my one chance and, essentially, I was going into this knowing I wouldn’t get a choice for the rest of the night.

“Stay,” I whispered.

“Say it louder.”

A whimper left my lips. “Stay.”

The bed dipped and his teeth suddenly snagged my nipple. I cried out but when I tried to touch him, he pinned my hands.

“Beg me to make you cum.”

“Please.” He didn’t move. I tipped my head back and took a shaky breath. “Please, Erebus. Please make me cum.”

“Spread yourself for me.”

Tentatively, I grabbed either side of my labia and opened myself. I felt vulnerable and dirty like this. When I heard him breathing heavier, my body warmed knowing that I affected him.

It was fine. We’d do this and I’d go back to the way I was before. Maybe I’d finally go to therapy. If there was ever a sign from the universe, this was it.

There was a small creak, then something jingled briefly. Not knowing what he was doing made sweat bead on my brow. A sharp, excruciating pain flared between my legs when he struck me with something. I immediately dropped my hands and tried to close my legs, but he held them down.

“I didn’t tell you to stop,” he pointed out. There was a snapping sound that I tried to place. It was familiar.

“You said you wouldn’t hurt me,” I cried.

“Never said that. The only thing I’ll ever promise is that you’ll cum. Now, bare that pussy for me again.” When I hesitated, he dug his fingers into my thighs. “Don’t make me tie your ankles to the posts behind your head.”

Fuck. I let my knees fall to the sides and returned to my previous position. It still burned so much and I braced myself for the next one. When it came, I screamed and arched my back. He used two fingers to press against either side of my clit, then moved them back and forth. The pain was still there while my arousal awoke again.

His fingers disappeared and I didn’t have time to prepare before he whipped my pussy again. It happened in succession, five quick hits that had me crying and tearing the sheets when I could no longer keep my hands where he wanted them. The thing- a belt, I think- had struck my fingers as well, but that was nothing compared to the pain between my legs. It throbbed now, a constant drumbeat to remind me what the hell I’d gotten myself into with this maniac I’d invited into my bed all because he made my pussy weep.

He kissed away the tears on my cheeks. “That was for almost making me leave, Alana. And this is for asking me to stay.”

His lips pressed against mine at the same time that he buried his dick inside of me. I cried out, this time not from pain. I was so wet already that my body accepted him without protest. Something between a groan and a growl tore from his throat and he wasted no time pulling his hips back and driving himself into me again.

When his tongue met mine, my immediate response was to turn away, but I gripped the back of his neck instead. I lifted my feet from the bed and locked my ankles behind him.

It was like a one-night stand. That’s what I kept telling myself. Just a random guy here to have sex with me, then leave.

He pulled all the way out, then plunged back in, stretching me to what felt like my limit. Combined with the burn that still radiated over my skin, I was on the verge of overstimulation. I dropped my head back, breaking our kiss, and let myself focus on the sensations in my body. He moved slow on the way out and thrust into me hard. I felt every inch of him stroke my walls and when he rolled his hips, I let out an unfettered moan.

“Show me how you make yourself cum,” he demanded, pulling out of me. The emptiness was maddening. I tried to bring him closer with my legs, but he was a stone statue. “Now, Alana.”

With a frustrated huff, I moved my hand between my legs and inserted three fingers. Even then, it didn’t feel like it had when he was inside of me. Everything around us was so quiet that the sound of what I was doing seemed loud. I moved faster, listening to it and letting it drive me on.

“I could watch you play with your pussy forever.”

I moved my hips to match my cadence while I used my thumb to circle my clit. It was sensitive in both a good and a bad way, but I needed it, the extra push to drive me into an orgasm. With my free hand, I lightly pinched one of my nipples, igniting the fire in my core. Just as my pussy began to tighten, he grabbed my wrist and wrenched my hand away, then filled me with his dick. I cried out, clamping down on his shaft. While I was still convulsing, he sucked all three of my fingers into his mouth.

My core pulsed with heat and electricity. It was violent, which felt fitting for this absurdity. I didn’t know how much time passed, but when I was able to focus again, he was still fucking me, but gently.

“Mm,” he groaned, lifting my leg to bite my ankle. His lips continued over the top of my foot. “I thought you broke. When’s the last time you came, Alana?”

“With you,” I breathed. His dick hit me so deeply that it was painful, but when he shifted his hips, I found myself seeking more.

“And before that?”

I shook my head, unable to think, let alone form words. He flipped me over and his fingers wrapped around my throat from behind, only allowing me the barest amount of air. He fucked me harder, abandoning the sweet and gentle person he’d been a moment ago. I pushed my hips back, raising my ass higher to get closer to him. Grabbing onto the metal posts of the headboard, I simultaneously used them to keep us connected and to hold on for dear life.

His fingers dug into my throat as he pounded into me. I struggled to draw in breath, but he didn’t let up. He gave me only as much as I needed to stay conscious. Every stroke felt like it reached into my pelvis and threatened to bruise me from the inside.

“Let me feel you squeeze my cock again, baby.”

“I… Mm, fuck. I need…” I reached between my legs, but he grabbed my hand and returned it to the headboard.

“All you need is my cock.”

To punctuate his statement, he angled his dick in a way that made my head droop forward and my fingers grip the bars more tightly. His weight pressed down on my back and he simply rolled his hips, hitting that spot repeatedly.

“See, Alana? It was fucking made for you. You’re so fucking close, I can feel it. Drown my cock, baby.”

Grabbing onto my hair, he pulled my head back and crushed his lips to mine. When my orgasm crested, I couldn’t hold myself up anymore. He wrapped an arm around my waist, taking the weight off of my arms while he continued to kiss me, even though I wasn’t really returning the gesture. I couldn’t when my head was swept up in this flood of absolute madness. I didn’t know how it felt so incredible and I wouldn’t let myself think about it too much.

He growled against my lips and I felt him swell inside of me. Breaking our kiss, he dropped his mouth to my shoulder and bit down hard enough to make me cry out. It helped bring me back to reality a little bit and as I knelt there, waiting for him to come down, I wondered what exactly I’d just done.

Chapter 26

Jayce

My teeth nearly broke through Alana’s skin. Part of me registered that a bite mark was exactly what fucked over Ted Bundy, but I couldn’t begin to care. I was still cumming and even though I’d lost all concept of time, I knew it had been longer than usual. Longer than should have been legal.

Twelve fucking years. It felt like I’d gone insane. This couldn’t be real. This couldn’t be my cock inside of Alana. It couldn’t be my cock she choked with the force of her orgasms. I couldn’t be this fucking lucky.

Releasing her shoulder, I moved back, slowly pulling out of her. My breath got caught in my throat when I saw my cum dripping out of her. I couldn’t stop myself from dropping to my elbows to follow its trail with my tongue. I needed to taste us both together to let me know that this was real.

She jerked when I licked her sensitive clit. Using my fingers, I scooped more of it out of her and let it dribble into my mouth. I flipped her onto her back and made a path with my tongue up her body, spreading our combined cum over her skin. When I reached her neck, I sucked on it while I pushed my fingers into her mouth.

“Taste us.”

She let me spread it over her tongue, but she didn’t do anything else. I rose up to look at her face. Her cheeks were flushed, but her lips betrayed her tension.

The high was past and she once again saw me as the villain.

“You’re allowed to enjoy this,” I told her as I got to my feet.

“Please leave.”

I gritted my teeth while I dressed. After putting my mask on, I helped her take off the blindfold. She blinked, appearing dazed. When her eyes settled on me, the defiance there made me want to fuck her until she begged again.

Had I become ungovernable? Maybe.

Grabbing onto her jaw, I leaned down close to her face. “The sooner you accept it, the less you’ll needlessly torture yourself.”

She swatted at my hand. “I’m not accepting anything. You manipulated me.”

“Okay.”

Her eyes narrowed before she jumped up to rush into the hall. The bathroom door slammed and I was left there feeling… I didn’t even know.

With an annoyed growl, I followed her. “If you don’t unlock the door, I’ll break it down like the last one.”

I heard the latch turn, so I threw it open. Alana was standing in front of the mirror trying to see the mark on her shoulder. I thought I hadn’t broken the skin, but it was bleeding a little. When I approached her, she tried to move away. I grabbed her by the waist and set her on the counter, then ran my fingers over the mark, which made her hiss.

Dropping into a crouch, I opened one of the drawers and pulled out some cotton balls, along with alcohol. She remained silent while dabbed at the wound, only the tight set to her jaw betraying that it hurt.

“You don’t get to run away from me,” I said.

She just let out a frustrated breath. I cleared my throat and focused on keeping my voice and accent in character. It was a pain in the ass, but it was getting easier, almost natural when I was wearing the mask. It was infinitely harder when I was fucking her.

“I’m sure you have a million thoughts and concerns. Just know that I’m not going to actually hurt you. This isn’t a passing obsession that will morph into something dangerous. You may be afraid, but you will always be safe with me.”

“Why the mask?” she asked quietly, keeping her eyes on the floor. I didn’t like that, so I pinched her chin and made her look at me.

“Mystery, suspense, excitement, concealment. Why does anyone wear a mask?”

“Because they’re ugly.”

I chuckled before I released her and stepped back. She remained where she was as I leaned against the wall.

“You don’t trust me or this situation.”

She looked at me incredulously. “Why would I? This is completely batshit.”

“You’re batshit and so am I. Who the fuck cares? The people out there don’t get a say in what you do and they don’t have a claim on what’s considered acceptable. If you get turned on by a man you don’t know coming in your room and scaring you, claim that. It’s ridiculous to deny yourself what makes you happy when life comes and goes so quickly that the universe won’t even remember us.”

“It’s way more than what people think about me. I don’t care if they know who and how I fuck.” She hopped down from the counter and walked out of the bathroom. “I don’t know what you want from me and the fact remains that you scare me. Outside of… sex… that’s still a problem. This whole thing is a fucking problem.”

She sat on the bed, then scooted backward when I came closer. I stopped a few feet away. Right now, I didn’t want her fear or her pain. She was talking to me, the masked and terrifying version that she’d thought about killing not that long ago. I reached into my pocket and pulled out the knife. I saw her throat bob, but when I tossed it to the bed, she grabbed it and held it against her chest protectively.

“Would you do it again?” I asked.

With her lip between her teeth, she dropped her gaze to my chest. “Maybe. I don’t know.”

I was glad she couldn’t see the smile behind my mask. “I guess we’ll find out next time.”

She shivered and looked down at her hands. “Where are you from?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“You feel familiar, but I would recognize your accent. I’d know.”

If she figured it out now, I might not be too upset about it, even though she wasn’t where I needed her yet. I’d rip this mask off immediately if I knew that she was ready.

“Go to sleep,” I instructed. “You haven’t been sleeping well.”

“I wonder why,” she muttered.

“Because you worry too damn much. Whether I’m outside or in here, I’m not a threat to you. You’re safer with me watching.”

She rolled her eyes but scooted back and pulled the covers up to her chest. “Make sure everything’s locked when you leave, which is right now.”

I came to the side of the bed and crouched. She still had the knife, which could be a problem, but we could consider this a trust exercise. I reached out to grab her throat without applying much pressure.

“Sleep, darling, and dream only of good things. My cock, for example.” Her lips twitched, but she kept her reaction at bay. I tightened my grip. “Or my tongue. My belt, if you wish. When I come back, I expect your complete and utter acceptance of what I want from you.”

“What do you want?” she whispered.

“Only everything you have to give me, Alana Monroe.”

I released her and grabbed my bag. When I reached the door, I paused. “Stay away from that teacher, even at work. You won’t like what I have to do if you disobey me.”

Without waiting for a response, I flipped the light off and closed the door. It wasn’t smart that I was trusting her not to go to the police again. I’d cum in her and she could fuck me over because of it, but I enjoyed the idea of her not showering and going to sleep wearing my scent. Not mine, but Erebus’. It still made me feel good.

On my way out, I set a kiss beside the coffee pot. One of these days, she’d fucking eat one of them and somehow, it would be a gesture of trust.

*****

“Alright, how are things coming along?” I asked.

It was quiet in the basement and I thought about turning on music, but I didn’t want to draw attention down here if anyone was outside. I didn’t know why they would be, but murder was a good reason to be a little paranoid. My phone would alert me if someone was outside, as well as if Alana used her code to get in, but if she heard the music, she might be curious about what I was doing down here and try to investigate. She was nosey like that when she was bored.

I adjusted the temperature of the composting vessel and gave it a once over. Preston’s body was lying on a bed of alfalfa, wood chips, and other material that would help him to biodegrade. I’d covered him in a good layer of it as well. If someone did come across this, they might not see what was inside unless they took the time to really look. I wouldn’t give them that much time.

The vessel was tucked behind a false wall with panels that slid into each other to open, so it was unlikely anyone would make it this far anyway. Unless they got close and investigated, I was safe. Every time I did this, though, the fear heightened.

Preston was the third person I’d composted. A guy named Ted was the first. He hit on Alana at a bar, which pissed Jake off. He was pretty drunk and threw a punch. It escalated and Ted threatened to have him arrested. While he was on his walk back home, I intercepted him.

It wasn’t just Alana I’d kill for. I was fiercely protective of my entire family. There were tiers, though, which was why Jake ended up in this vessel before Preston. She came above everybody and that would never change.

The body had only been in the vessel for about a week. I’d have to mess with it a few times but overall, it was an easy process. In a little less than two months, he’d have a new purpose, a better one than he had in life.

There was a notification on my phone that made me quickly move the wall back in place and head upstairs. I opened the front door and was nearly knocked over by Ben. He grabbed both sides of my neck and put his forehead against mine in a weird fucking greeting.

“What’s up, Jayce? Long time, no see.”

I glanced around, then motioned for him to come inside. He followed me into the kitchen where I poured us each a cup of coffee.

Ben leaned his elbows on the counter and the position made his biceps bulge. It was November, but he wore a t-shirt as if it wasn’t forty degrees outside. I was convinced he just liked to display his tattoos. He had full sleeves, which I was jealous of. I would’ve gone past my elbows, but I stalked a woman seven days a week and it was easier to hide them this way. I didn’t need to risk someone seeing any identifying marks.

As he drained his coffee- which was still piping hot- his green eyes roamed the space. He observed everything, storing away tidbits of information like a chipmunk stuffing its cheeks. If you were ever looking for something specific, he’d immediately be able to recall if he knew where to find it. And if he needed to, it was easy for him to act like he was ignorant of everything in the world.

“What are you doing here?” I asked. “I hate unannounced visits.”

“Pretty sure you hate all visits unless they’re from a certain green-eyed history teacher.”

My jaw clenched as I took a drink. The fucker had a sixth sense for these things. It might’ve been protective instincts, although I wasn’t sure he had those.

“You didn’t answer my question,” I pointed out.

“Oh, right. That favor you owe me.”

I fought the urge to groan. Finding Alana on Halloween had been the most important thing, but I hated being indebted to anyone, especially Ben. We weren’t friends. We were acquaintances who wouldn’t arouse suspicion by associating with each other if we were noticed because our relationship went way back. Owing the guy was not ideal, considering he dabbled in a little bit of everything. If you needed something, he was the one you called. If he was the one who called, you had to be prepared for anything ranging from picking up his groceries to burning a man alive.

He ran a hand through his ashy brown hair. “Alana still works at Alpine Grove, right?”

“Yeah,” I replied cautiously. “You of all people should know that.”

Waving a dismissive hand, he drained the second cup of coffee. With how squirrely Ben was, it’d be easy to think he was on drugs, but he didn’t fuck with that sort of stuff because of his dad.

“They let you in the doors? Don’t even make you check in, probably.”

Rubbing the back of my neck, I shrugged. “Sure. They like me there.”

He flashed me a suggestive smile. “Bet they’re all happy to see you when you come around.”

“What do you want from me?”

“My cousin is a sophomore there. He’s going through a tough time, his dad is getting divorced. Carson’s failing one of his classes and the coach said he can’t play if he doesn’t fix it.”

“And how does this involve me?”

“I need you to fix it,” he replied simply.

“How?”

“Get into the computer. Fudge the numbers a little, nothing too noticeable, but enough to get him a passing grade. I’ll make sure he keeps it that way, but with the semester already halfway over, he ain’t gonna make it. I don’t really care how you do it, just do it.”

“This could get me arrested,” I pointed out as I poured another cup.

“So could killing your brother and stalking my little sister, but here we are.”

Dropping my head back, I considered my options. I had none. Ben was like me. He knew enough information about the people around him to fuck things up if he didn’t get what he wanted.

“Fine. Who’s the target?”

“Some English teacher. Kinda an asshole. Carson hates the guy. Everhart.”

Because of course it was.

Chapter 27

Jayce

Dad: He’s getting served this weekend. Hoping everything goes smoothly, but when does it ever?

Slipping the phone back into my pocket, I tried not to think too much about it right now. It was their case and I would help where I could but if I got too involved, I might consider removing Mike from the picture altogether to make it easier. I had to keep a grip on myself or people could start disappearing at an alarming rate.

“Mr. Weste,” Mia greeted with a massive smile. Her eyes basically devoured me as I made my way over to her.

“Hey, Mia. I bet you’re glad it’s Friday.”

“You have no idea. I think it’s because of the holiday next week. These kids are freaking insane right now.”

“I bet. They’ll be a riot for you.”

“Oh, god. I might need something to de-stress.”

I licked my lips to hide the way her insinuation made me cringe. “I’d say the break might help, but some families tend to cause more stress.”

“What about yours?”

“Nah, mine are great. I’m lucky.”

Her expression morphed into something familiar. “Is this the first Thanksgiving without…”

I offered her a smile. “Yeah. At least we’ll all be together to get through it.”

“Will Ms. Monroe be there?”

“Of course. She’s family.”

“That’s so nice.”

Yes, it was so nice that I would bring the woman I loved to Thanksgiving with my family. In fact, if she ever tried to back out of it, I’d duct tape her, throw her over my shoulder, then chain her to a dining room chair so that I could force feed her mashed potatoes. At the end of it, I’d call her my good girl and she’d realize she was being needlessly obstinate.

“Maybe I’ll see you next week,” she went on.

“You know I’ll be here at least once.”

Stepping away from her, I pushed through the double doors into the hallway. When I passed Alana’s classroom, I peeked inside quickly. She was sitting at her desk with the coffee I’d had delivered for her. From the frown on her face and the way she was staring at it, I figured she didn’t care for the note I had them put on it.

If you drink it, you’re mine.

-E

I continued to watch, even though I didn’t want her to see me. She would probably drink it. She was a fiend for coffee. I needed to know for sure, though.

Her fingers tapped on the desk repeatedly as if this was the hardest decision of her life. Maybe it was. Just like when she let me fuck her, she knew I wasn’t playing around and her acquiescence was locked in. She was very aware that I was both dangerous and a bit unhinged. I loved that, despite knowing those things, she begged me to make her cum.

One day, I’d bend her over that desk during lunchtime and make her stay completely quiet while we roleplayed some weird teacher fantasy for the hell of it. Anything this woman wanted to do, I was game.

I smiled when she sealed her lips around the straw and took a drink. As discreetly as I could, I snapped a picture through the window on her door before I headed toward my real target.

“Hey,” I said when I saw Kyle peeking out of a classroom. I leaned against the wall beside it. “You good in five?”

“Yeah. I got you, Jayce.”

I held out my hand and he shook it. After he took the three hundred I gave him, he jogged down the hall. I walked the rest of the way to Mike’s room and knocked to be polite. When he looked up from his desk, I wanted to throw cordiality to the wind and punch him again, but I smiled instead.

“You got a second?”

His apprehension was clear but after a moment, he nodded. I closed the door behind me but didn’t latch it, leaving a small crack. The closer I got, the more nervous he looked. I grabbed a chair and moved it to the desk, then sat down, kicking my legs out in front of me.

“Let’s have a chat, Mike.”

“Is this business or personal?”

“Does it look like I teach kids?”

His jaw clenched. “No, but I think it’s strange that you came to my place of work to talk to me.”

“Well, I don’t have your number and, as you know, I often visit Alana here. It’s convenient more than anything.”

“Okay. You have…” He glanced at his cheap gold watch. “Fifteen minutes, although I’d prefer if it was faster.”

“The disrespect is noted.” I resisted the urge to glance toward the door and pressed my palms against my thighs. “I’ll make it short and sweet, then. You need to stay the hell away from Alana.”

To my surprise and annoyance, he laughed. “This is one of those things? Jesus.”

“This isn’t a joke, Mike.”

“And what happens if I don’t? We had a nice date and we get along well. I think I want to see more of her.”

I leaned forward and let a smile slide into place. “You’re so fucking stupid, Mike. It’s kind of funny to think about how much my brother would’ve hated you.”

“Let me guess. He would’ve kicked my ass.” He rolled his eyes at the idea.

“Don’t be ridiculous. He would’ve asked me to do it. Jake didn’t know a lot of things about me, but he knew damn well that I’m the one who’s a little fucking crazier and I can get shit done.”

“So, you are going to beat me up.” There was still an amused glint in his eyes that pissed me off.

I perched my elbows on the desk, flexing a little. He tried to hide it, but his gaze flitted toward my arms a couple of times.

“Let’s make it so that I don’t have to do anything,” I suggested.

“Threats are a funny thing. You can beat me within an inch of my life, but it won’t do any good because you’ll go to jail for assault and I’ll be free to do whatever I like with Alana.”

“I never said I was going to beat you up, just that Jake would want me to. No, that’s the least of your fucking concerns.”

“And what’s the greatest?” he taunted, matching my position as he leaned forward.

“Money seems to be an issue for you right now. It can’t be easy to take care of Alicia on your own, especially without child support from Jake, income from Hailey, and an ass load of money that belongs to a child who isn’t yours. Does that piss you off, Mike?”

His tough façade fell away and revealed the man behind the curtain. He was weak and a coward. The only things that made him feel powerful a moment ago were his secret plans, which he somehow thought were foolproof.

“Did you know the whole time?” I went on. “Or were you under the impression that she was your kid? Maybe she used you when she found out she was pregnant. Did you start dating when she wasn’t very far along or were you already together when she slept with my brother? It must’ve been so easy to say the baby was yours.”

“Shut the fuck up,” he snapped.

“Happy to. And you’re going to leave Alana alone. Don’t talk to her, don’t acknowledge her, don’t even fucking look at her.”

“Getting me out of the picture won’t make her fall for you.”

“Obviously. She fell for me years ago. What this does is protect her from someone who wants to use her so that he can get access to funds that don’t belong to him. Did you really think she’d help you with anything after she found out who you were?”

“I know things too, you know. Things Hailey told me.”

I cocked my head. “I’m sure whatever you think you know was born of delusion. Hailey was a headcase.”

The door swung open and slammed into the wall. Kyle stood there with a frantic expression on his face. He didn’t spare a glance at me, which I found impressive.

“Mr. Everhart, Patrick and Lucas are fighting. They look like they’re going to kill each other!”

“God damnit.” Mike got to his feet and headed for the door. “I’ll be right back.”

When his footsteps were no longer audible, I moved around to the other side of his desk. The computer was unlocked from what he’d been doing before I showed up. I scanned the icons, trying to figure out which one connected to the gradebook. I figured it’d be easy and say ‘gradebook.’ Apparently, I was wrong.

I pulled up his minimized browser, but it was just his school email. Briefly, I scanned it to see if there was anything interesting. There was one to Alana, which looked like random back and forth conversations during class so they weren’t caught on their phones.

Damnit, I had to hurry. I started clicking on random desktop icons that looked like they could be it. Finally, I found the right one. It was confusing, though. I didn’t know which period Carson was in, which didn’t help.

“What the fuck are you doing?”

I froze with my fingers on the keyboard. Raising my gaze, I took in Alana’s horrified expression.

“What are you doing?” I asked. “Another lunch date with micro Dickens?”

She glanced behind her, then hurried toward me. “Seriously, Jayce.” She gasped when she saw the screen. “Tell me what you’re doing right now or-”

“You gonna report me, little… Alana?”

She gave me a weird look but ignored it. I’d almost fucked things up on multiple fronts and it wasn’t even noon yet. This identity thing was a pain in my ass.

“Jayce.”

“Fuck,” I muttered, dropping my head back. “It’s for Ben.”

“Ben?” she hissed. “Why are you doing something for him?”

“Because I owed him a favor. Your cousin is failing and if he wants to play basketball, he has to pass this class.”

“You were going to fudge the grades. That’s insane. You know that’s insane, right?”

“It’ll be more insane when your brother hangs me in a meat locker and sells my muscled thighs to some rich prick cannibals.”

Her eyes widened comically. “Does he do that?”

“I don’t know. Ask him.”

“No. I don’t want to be part of all that. Besides, he doesn’t give a shit.”

“He does. He just doesn’t know how to deal with everything that’s happened. Ten years makes for a lot of shit to swim through.”

“Whatever. It’s not important right now. Scoot.”

I stared at her for a moment. “No.”

“What? We need to hurry.”

Patting my lap, I pushed the chair back a little so she’d have room. Her mouth opened and she looked toward the door. I raised a challenging brow as I waited. Her cheeks pinked before she gingerly sat on my leg. I gripped her thighs and rolled us into the desk, which forced her to sit back further.

Now that I’d been with her, I just couldn’t help myself. I needed at least a little bit of contact with her.

Leaning forward, I stared at what she was doing. My cheek was level with her forehead and I could hear the shaky breaths coming from her nose. She typed away, adjusting every assignment slightly until Carson’s grade reached a barely passing level. When she exited out, she pushed backward. I fought the urge to groan at the way her ass rubbed on my cock.

“Jayce.”

I rolled us away from the desk and she immediately stood. When she bent over, my eyes were locked on her perfect round ass in her jeans. She pulled open a drawer and touched the files until she found Carson’s. After removing the entire thing, she motioned for me to follow her.

We were nearly to the door when Mike turned into the room. Alana took a step back, thrusting the file behind her. I came closer so that it was hidden between our bodies. To make it look less suspicious, I wrapped an arm around her, flattening my palm against her stomach. With my hand on the other side of her, I took the folder and held it in place so that she could drop her hand.

“Alana,” Mike said, sounding annoyed from the fight he’d come from. “What’s going on?”

“Just came looking for my lunch date,” she replied. “He was taking longer than I thought he would.”

“Ah, I see. Are you okay?”

She squirmed when my hips pressed against her. “Yeah, totally fine. I’ll see you after school.”

He said something, but she was already scurrying out of the room with me still pressed against her back. When we got into the hall, she pried my hand away and walked briskly toward her classroom. Yeah, I was probably going to pay for my antics in there.

Once I closed the door behind us, she whirled on me. “What is your deal?”

“I don’t have a deal. I was just trying to get us out of there.”

“You came into my school to commit a freaking crime, Jayce.”

“Is it a crime?”

“I don’t know! You can’t do that kind of stuff. I can’t just have a day of goddamn peace anymore.”

“Me being here had nothing to do with you, so don’t act like it did.”

“I had to get you out of that mess, otherwise he would have caught you.”

“Then let him. I knew it was a risk. You shouldn’t try to protect me. That’s my job, Alana.”

“No. You’re just supposed to be my friend.”

She wrapped her arms around herself and it made her look small. I stepped toward her, but she shook her head.

“I don’t want to talk to you right now,” she said. “You’re doing shady shit with my brother and making me uncomfortable.”

Narrowing my eyes, I closed the distance between us regardless of her protests. I ran my hands down her arms, wishing I could do more than this.

“It was just one thing,” I assured her. “Now it’s done. No more shady shit.”

“Why’d you owe Ben a favor, Jayce?”

I set my jaw as I thought about what to say. Telling her the truth might come across as stalker-ish, which I couldn’t afford for her to think. Pieces would start fitting together and she’d figure it out before we got to a place where she’d accept both sides of me.

“Jayce,” she prompted.

“He found something for me.”

“It must’ve been pretty damn important.”

“You could say that.”

Her palms flattened on my chest and my eyes closed. I couldn’t help but lean in closer, relishing the way her fingers felt on my body. Then, the pressure increased. She shoved hard and when I didn’t budge, she slammed her hands against me. I caught her wrists and put them back where they were, keeping my eyes locked on hers. It felt like something was trying to explode out of me.

“Don’t be angry,” I said firmly.

“You need to go. My class starts soon.”

She tried to pull out of my grasp, but I held on. I was fucking tired of this. Withholding. Keeping myself at arm’s length. It hurt me, but there was nothing I could do about it.

Maybe… Maybe I’d been overcomplicating it. It could backfire if I gave it a shot, but the game I’d been playing had that chance as well. Possibly more so. It rode on twisting and breaking her, which I had no issue with as long as it worked.

Fuck it. I physically couldn’t stop myself.

I released her and wrapped an arm around her waist. She gasped when I pulled her flush against me. With my other hand on the side of her neck, I kept her firmly in place and kissed her. I’d planned this exact moment for so long that it felt familiar. This was right. It was everything I would ever want in this godforsaken world and I’d been denied it for half my fucking life.

She didn’t even fucking hesitate. Alana melted into me easily, molding her lips to mine and following my movements like this was a choreographed dance. This was natural, the easiest thing I’d ever done.

She belonged to me. Mine. Fucking mine. She always had been and I should’ve stolen her from Jake the moment he brought her home. Fuck him, fuck Preston, fuck Mike. Fuck Alana, even, for acting like she didn’t know who she truly belonged to. My name was etched into her soul and her blood flowed through my veins with every beat of her heart. As long as she was alive, that wouldn’t change. It couldn’t change. Some things were fixed, set in stone. That’s what we were.

I pressed her back against the desk as I delved into her mouth. My hand on her waist dipped underneath her shirt to feel her soft skin. I squeezed her tightly, trying to leave my mark on her. Moving my fingers into her hair, I cradled her head while I tipped it back, giving me full control over her lips.

God, she was so malleable. She was independent and never would have been submissive for Jake, but for me she was. For me, she’d be anything I wanted. She knew I’d take care of her, protect her, kill for her, so she trusted me to hold her most broken pieces.

She whimpered against me and I tightened my grip as words long silenced tried to burst free. “Alana, I-”

With a sharp intake of breath, she turned her head. I swallowed and tried to steady my heart.

“You need to go,” she whispered.

“No. No, Alana, I’m not gonna fucking go.”

“My class…”

“That’s not what this is about.” My teeth ached from how hard they were clenched.

“I can’t give you what you want. It’s not fair to you.”

“What I want?” I repeated, my voice rising. “Tell me what you want.”

“I can’t do this, Jayce.” She squeezed out from between me and the desk. I watched her stop at the window and stare out at the field.

“It’s because you feel guilty.”

“Go. Please. I can’t do this.”

“Stop feeling guilty for loving me, Alana!”

She flinched and her shoulders rose. I stared at her back for another moment before I swiped a hand down my face.

“You saw him? Felt him? Heard him?”

All she did was nod and it was enough to fucking destroy me. It was too soon. I’d made a mistake by kissing her so quickly. I got lost in fanciful thoughts of things working out because that’s how it was supposed to be, right? True love always finds a way, true love’s kiss will fix everything.

Yeah, thanks, Disney. Maybe it was time to teach kids something realistic. Life didn’t always go your way and things didn’t just work out because they were supposed to. They sure as shit wouldn’t make a movie about a stalker who tried to force a woman’s hand, even if it did result in a happy ending.

Without another word, I exited the classroom. The bell rang and a gaggle of teenagers began scrambling toward their classes. I wished life were this simple again.

Whatever I had to do, I would get my happy ending. You can bet your ass that I wasn’t going to give up. I just had to return to the old plan and hope things on this side could be salvaged.

She didn’t get a fucking choice. She never had one. With Erebus, she understood that, so that’s where I had to focus my attention.

Chapter 28

Jayce

It was Thanksgiving, which used to be my favorite holiday because my parents were damn good cooks and there were no expectations on this day. I didn’t have to buy gifts or bags of candy or plastic fucking eggs that were killing the planet. We cooked together, ate, laughed, and passed out fat and happy.

Jayce: I’ll pick you up in an hour.

Alana: I’ll drive myself.

The response was better than nothing considering nothing was exactly what I’d been given for the last six days. I didn’t go to her as either of my personas, both to punish me and her. All I did was watch like the days of old.

She looked for me again. I never told her when I was coming back, but it seemed that she expected me on Saturday because that was when I’d shown up in the past. Over the weekend, I forced myself to stay put, even after her fourth time staring out the window.

I sent her a coffee every day at work and she kept drinking them. To me, it was her continuing to reinforce that she belonged to me. She must have suspected I was watching her. I always was.

Staying gone forever wasn’t my intention. I just wanted to make her wonder. Hopefully, she was sweating while she waited for what could come next.

I kept my eyes trained on her sliding glass door from my place in the trees. She was dressed and looked ready, but I didn’t know what she was waiting for. She’d never had a problem with showing up early to my parents’ place. Maybe it was because of Jake. Next weekend marked the year anniversary of his death. It couldn’t be easy for her.

Alana had confirmed my fears last week. As much as I didn’t want to, I had to focus a little more on Erebus, but I also needed to be careful about our true relationship. I couldn’t let it fade or shatter. I wouldn’t make her think that I didn’t have feelings for her, nor would I give her too much space. There was a very delicate balance to maintain if I was going to merge these relationships someday.

She was standing by the table with a hand on her hip. Suddenly, her head snapped down and she picked up her phone. At the same moment, I saw someone jog up the stairs.

What the hell was he doing here?

I couldn’t see the door, but she must’ve opened it. With them away from the window, I had no way to know what was going on. Cautiously, I left my spot and headed toward her building. Instead of going up right away, I continued to the parking lot where I saw a car idling. There was a head visible in the backseat.

After flipping on the lights of my mask, I walked over to her window. She was playing a game on a tablet and didn’t see me for a few seconds. When she did, she jumped a little, then offered me a nervous smile. I opened the door and crouched so that we could look at each other.

“Hey, Alicia.”

“What are you doing here?” she asked.

“Protecting you, remember?”

Her eyes widened. “Is it dangerous here?”

“No, but your dad shouldn’t have left you in the car by yourself. That’s not very safe.”

“It’s okay. Nobody ever comes over to me. Well, you did.”

She laughed a little, but her words didn’t evoke amusement from me. Sure, she wasn’t a toddler, but I didn’t like that he left her in the car. Not just this time, either.

“Is your stepdad nice?” I ventured.

Her brow furrowed. “Nice? He’s okay.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“I don’t really know you,” she mumbled, turning to look out the back window.

Reaching into my pocket, I pulled out a Hershey’s kiss. It made me feel like a creep, but I didn’t have a van, nor did I have gross intentions. She eyed it for a moment, then reached for it. I pulled it back and tutted at her.

“Lesson number one: don’t take candy from strangers. I’d be very upset if something bad happened to you and I’d have to resort to vigilante justice.”

Her face fell. With a small shake of my head and a laugh, I took her hand, dropping the chocolate into it.

“Lesson number two, you can trust me.”

“But you’re a stranger.”

“No, I’m not. Right now, though, I guess you could say I have a secret identity. I’ll tell you why someday, but it isn’t time yet.”

“Then, how am I supposed to know that I can trust you?”

I glanced up at the window to make sure nobody was there. Leaning close to her, I dropped my voice. “Because I knew your dad more than anyone and I’m the one he trusted to watch out for you when he was gone.”

She gasped. “You knew my dad?”

“Sure did. One day, I’ll tell you all about him. Embarrassing stories, his favorite foods, what he was like at your age.”

“Can you tell me one now?”

I hummed thoughtfully, looking at the window again. “His favorite thing to eat was a heaping pile of nachos with everything on them. Cheese, onions, lettuce, olives, tomato, guacamole, the works. If you went out to dinner with him and the place had nachos, he would get them without fail.”

“I like nachos.”

“I don’t think we’d be friends if you didn’t.”

She smiled widely, revealing two dimples. Gah, my heart. I was supposed to keep my distance, but I was getting attached to the kid already.

Maybe if I killed Mike…

No, bad idea. It was too easy to be implicated in that.

“I gotta go,” I told her as I got up from my crouch.

“But you’re supposed to keep me safe.”

“I’ll be watching, kid. You be good. Except with your dad. Be a little tyrant for him, okay?”

She laughed before she went back to her game. I closed the door softly and hurried around the back of the building. Using the downstairs unit’s patio railing, I hoisted myself up high enough to grab the bottom of Alana’s balcony. From there, it was just a matter of reaching the next wrung, then the top of the balustrade. After I pulled myself over the side, I dropped lightly onto the concrete.

Alana and Mike were in the kitchen and it looked like they were talking. She had her elbows resting on the island while he leaned his hands on it. They were separated by that barrier, but it was still too close for my liking. She wasn’t even supposed to see him anymore. I’d made that very clear.

Maybe she was selling me out. It didn’t seem like something she would do, but she’d never really been mad at me before. Even though they were different, Ben was her brother. I was sure she could channel some of his controlled craziness if she needed to.

She laughed at something he said, which made me step closer to the window. Her eyes found me and her mouth fell open. When I cocked my head, she blinked rapidly and returned her attention to her guest.

She knew she was in trouble. Maybe she should’ve thought about that before letting him into her apartment.

I grabbed onto the roof and pulled myself up so that Mike wouldn’t see me, then I waited.

The front door opened and voices followed. I wondered how vocal cords worked. It wasn’t something I’d looked into before, but I might need to so that I could remove his larynx. The world didn’t need to hear his voice anymore and neither did Alana.

“Thanks again,” he said.

“It’s nothing. Really. I’ll see you Monday.” She spoke quickly and when he tried to say something else, she muttered something I couldn’t understand before she closed the door. A minute later, the slider opened.

“Erebus,” she hissed.

I stayed where I was. She stepped further out, scanning the trees. When she turned around and looked up, she put a hand on her chest with a curse.

“What are you doing?” she demanded.

I hung my arms over my knees. “What are you doing, Alana?”

“Come down.”

“You’re not going to like what happens if I do that.”

Pursing her lips, she looked to the side. I scooted to the edge, then dropped down in front of her. Instinctively, she took a step back. I grabbed her biceps and pushed her further until she was pressed against the railing. She leaned away, giving me a view of the pulse point in her neck. I could see how fast her heart was racing.

“I told you to stay away from the teacher,” I reminded her. “Do you think I say things idly because I like to hear my own voice?”

“It’s Thanksgiving. I gave him a pie, that’s all.”

“Into baking now?”

“I bought one, but he doesn’t have to know that. It’s been hard since his wife died.”

“I’m sure it has. That isn’t your problem, though.”

“Right. I don’t know why I expected a stalker to have a heart.”

With a growl, I spun her around and bent her over the railing. She gripped it tightly to keep herself steady. I reached around to unbutton her pants and within seconds I had them pushed down to her ankles.

“Stop,” she cried. Her knees were shaking, either from cold or fear. It didn’t matter.

“Isn’t this what you want? Someone to care about you, to fuck you and make you feel special.”

“No.”

“You went on those dates,” I pointed out. “You looked for something you’ll never find in any of these men, but it’s right in front of you.”

“What’s that? Delusion?”

With a dark chuckle, I pulled out my cock and stroked it. “Maybe. I’ve been living within delusion my whole life, but not anymore.” Positioning my lips at her ear, I cupped her pussy and used my middle finger to circle her clit. “You want me as much as I want you and I’d like you to admit it.”

She shook her head frantically. I moved back enough to position my cock at her entrance. She tensed and tried to close her legs.

“Admit it and I’ll let you cum.”

“Stop, please. I’m…”

“Use your words, Alana.”

“I’m on my period,” she admitted sheepishly.

“Hm.”

I already knew that, of course. I was in her apartment almost every night, except for recently, but I kept track on my phone. Many things were easier if you were aware of the state of a woman’s body at all times. When she was with Jake, it allowed me to make sure no mistakes were made. If she accidentally got pregnant with his baby, it would make things infinitely more difficult for me. Every time she was late by more than a few days, I’d slip her one of the misoprostol Ben got for me. Better safe than sorry.

Pulling out the blindfold I’d stuffed in my hoodie pocket for this visit, I situated it over her eyes, ignoring her protests. When I dropped to my knees and pulled her legs apart, she continued to fight me.

“Do you think I’m scared of some blood from your pussy?”

“Please, it’s gross.”

Tearing off my mask, I narrowed my eyes at nothing in particular. “Don’t tell me your late fiancé was afraid to get a little messy.”

Her lack of a response made me furious. What a fucking disgrace. I hoped my brother was watching me from hell so that he could see me bathe in the blood of her femininity.

Chapter 29

Jayce

“If your hands leave that railing, I’ll make sure it’s the last time you disobey me.”

Her legs trembled with her fear. I stared at her hands for another moment to confirm that she’d listen. Palming both of her ass cheeks, I spread her open wide and circled her back hole with my tongue. She jerked and let out a little growl but maintained her grip.

“Some men think your menstrual cycle is the perfect opportunity for alternatives. Your ass, your mouth… Those are lesser men, Alana, and you deserve so much more than that. It can help with your pain.”

I reached around to circle her clit with my middle finger, holding her ass with my other hand to keep her still.

“It can even be more pleasurable.” When I bit down on her cheek, she whimpered. “Now, why would a real man want to deprive you of something like that?”

Moving my hand further up, I pushed on her back. She bent slightly over the balcony, which gave me better access to her pussy. My tongue pressed against her ass again before I moved forward.

“Think I can tie a knot like a cherry stem?” I joked, then clamped down on the string and pulled.

Her entire body went rigid. I dropped the tampon onto the concrete before I made a long swipe with my tongue across the length of her. She felt so fucking warm in the brisk air; her pussy pulsed with heat and need. As I continued to lick her, I tasted her arousal mixed with her blood. I nipped at her labia, rolling my teeth over her skin and drawing a startled cry from her, but she pushed back, seeking more.

When I pulled back, my face was wet, marked by her. It made my cock throb and I wanted to grab it, but it didn’t belong in my hand. It was hers. I hadn’t cum since I was last here and that was too fucking long.

Getting to my feet, I wasted no time before I buried myself completely inside of her, making her cry out. She was tight, not quite ready for me yet, but she was wet from her arousal and blood. When I made a few slow strokes, she began to relax, but her fingers still clung to the railing with a death grip.

Gripping her by the hair, I tugged her head backward. The angle made her neck crane unnaturally and she tried to dislodge my hand, but I held on tight. My lips came down on hers with the force of all my anger from the past couple of days. When I forced my tongue inside, I spread her blood and her wetness across the roof of her mouth.

Her grunts and attempted pleas were useless. I kept a death grip on her hair and her hip while I fucked her relentlessly. She tried to bite my tongue, which made me thrust into her harder. The force of it made her pelvic bones slam into the metal. I did it again and clamped down on her lip. More blood hit my tongue, but it wasn’t enough. I dug into the inside of my lip so that my blood could join hers, mingling the way it was meant to.

I put my hands beside hers and thrust into her hard enough to make the metal shake.

“If you need to hold on for dear life, you should use the one who’s making you fight for it,” I said.

For a second, she did nothing, then she lifted her hands and settled them on top of mine. Her nails dug into my fingers when I started to fuck her harder. I squeezed the railing and snapped my hips with all the force I could muster. With every thrust, the metal groaned. Alana punctured my skin but I didn’t relent. The pain drove me on, reminding me of why I was so fucking angry.

“Please, Erebus,” she whined.

“You want me to make you cum?” She nodded jerkily. “I want you to apologize for disobeying me.”

“You’re not… my boss….” she said between labored breaths.

“Do you hear how childish that sounds?”

“Do you hear… how… controlling you sound?”

She moved her ass, trying to push back against me. I kept her pinned against the balustrade, refusing to give her anything. Until she gave me what I wanted, she was my fuck toy to use as I pleased.

“No,” I replied, punctuating the word with a long stroke. “You just have no idea what it’s like to consume a man’s soul and for him to devour you in return. I breathe your air so I can have a taste of you. There’s no world where I could allow you to be in a situation that would put you at risk. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

“He’s… a nice person.”

With a growl, I pulled out of her and flipped her around. I lifted her, pressing her against the wall of the apartment. Her legs wrapped around me tightly and her arms locked behind my neck. I was too aware of the fact that she could try to pull my hood down and take off her blindfold, but I could stop her before she got very far. Part of me wanted to trust her not to. She at least seemed to give into our sex now. It was afterward that I needed to worry about.

Dropping my lips to the front of her throat, I inhaled as my cock slid inside of her again. Her wet, hot pussy quivered around me, threatening to choke every inch.

“Don’t make me resort to cruder methods,” I warned.

“He’s not a threat.”

“You wouldn’t know a wolf if it tore your fucking throat out.”

“You can’t keep me away from everybody,” she managed to get out between her moans.

“And why would you think that, Alana?”

Her head dropped back against the wall. I wished I could see her eyes right now. Would she have them closed or keep her gaze locked on mine? I smeared my bloody fingers across her cheek, then down her neck before I thrust them into her mouth. She bit down, making me smile.

“Because you’re not real,” she replied.

“Aren’t I?” I gripped her ass firmly as I increased my speed to emphasize my point.

“You’re… oh, fuck.”

A shrill cry left her as her pussy clamped down. We needed to get to my parents’ house, so I let myself follow. Pleasure rippled down my spine and I buried myself deep as my cock jolted inside of her. It took me a moment to catch my breath enough to focus on her face again. Even though I couldn’t see her eyes, the tight set of her lips told me she was thinking.

“Tell me,” I said, brushing my mouth over hers.

“You’re not real. You don’t exist in my actual life. Just a creature in the shadows that I have to fear.”

I laughed softly. “Fear. You may fear me, but you also let me fuck you.”

“I don’t have a choice.”

Her words made me angry and I pressed her more firmly against the wall. “Lying to me is annoying. Lying to yourself is pathetic. I gave you a choice and you begged me to come back and finish the job.”

I dropped her and she barely managed to land on her feet. Crouching, I spread her open with one hand and sunk my tongue inside of her. The combination of our mixed cum plus her blood was the equivalent of her signing over her life to me. Before she could get the blindfold off, I grabbed her by the throat and squeezed her cheeks to force her mouth open. I let it all drip onto her tongue, then released her. She immediately leaned over and spit it out.

“If you hate me so much, then go to the cops, baby. You have my cum in your pussy and my blood under your nails. I’ve given you the power. What are you gonna do with it?”

I put on my mask and climbed onto the roof. She was still in the same spot, breathing heavily.

“Happy Thanksgiving,” I said. “Save me a piece of pie for when I come back tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?” she repeated, reaching up to take off the covering over her eyes.

“I’m going to show you exactly why you need to stay away from Mr. Everhart. Maybe you’ll learn that, sometimes, deciding who to trust is more complicated than you know.”

*****

Looking down at my knuckles, I frowned. Alana had marked me, which I would be ecstatic about if she wasn’t going to walk in that fucking door soon. She might not put two and two together, but she could, which had been enough to convince me that I needed to do something about the cuts.

Before I came here, I grabbed some of my rings from my house and put them on the fingers with the red indents. They were in the perfect spot to hide them for the most part. Since it was only a couple on each hand, they didn’t look too gaudy.

As I set the table, I started to feel a little nervous. Me and Alana had barely spoken since that kiss in her classroom. I had to find a way to salvage it, but none of my ideas seemed good enough. Right now, she liked Erebus- her fucking stalker- more than me. She feared him immensely, yet she allowed him to kiss her, whereas she pushed me away simply because I shared a face with my brother.

Ridiculous.

I knew she was here before she said anything. As if her presence wasn’t enough, I was overwhelmed by her scent. It was stronger than earlier, so she must have taken another shower. Considering she was a mess when I left, it made sense, but I’d hoped she would still be dripping my cum when she arrived.

Someday, I told myself. Someday, I’d take her in our kitchen in the home we shared, and I’d make her keep me inside of her all fucking day. When every bit had run down her thighs, I’d fuck her again, no matter where we were.

After I set the last plate down, I turned. She was standing in the doorway between the living and dining room. Her hair was damp, pulled back in a neat bun. Dark liner framed her green eyes, making the color more aggressive in a way that intensified her allure.

Mine. All fucking mine.

Pushing back the raging possessiveness, I moved toward her. She eyed me cautiously, as if I was an animal she expected to pounce. I was, but she shouldn’t be looking at me like that. I was Jayce, her protector, the one who was always there for her.

I shook my head and closed the distance between us. When I wrapped her in my arms, she let out a shuddering breath and returned the embrace. I reached up to unwind the tie from her hair, letting it fall loosely over her shoulders. As I pulled back, I ran my fingers through it.

“I’m sorry,” I said softly.

She shook her head. “I know… I know what you feel for me. We should’ve addressed it a long time ago. It’s my fault.”

“No, I shouldn’t have kissed you like that.” Her expression fractured along with my heart. “I’ll be whatever you need, Alana. Just don’t push me out. I can’t live with that.”

“Maybe one day, Jayce. I can’t make any promises, but I also can’t deny that I feel something for you too.”

The beat in my chest quickened. “What do you feel?”

“I can’t say it. I’m not ready. And I don’t want you to stop living your life because of something that might never happen.”

“You’ve always been the only one for me. Nothing has changed that and it never will.”

Tears brimmed in her eyes. I smiled before I pressed a kiss to her forehead. It was an agonizing few seconds that we stayed like that. Torture and bliss combined, just like when I was Erebus, but reversed. As him, I had her body, but not her heart. And as me, I had her heart. It was more important, but there was still too much uncertainty.

My plan had been good, in theory. It had flaws, sure, but I was confident enough in it. Now that it was real, though, I was fucking terrified.

Things between us were too fragile right now. I needed to focus on our true relationship, on making sure we moved forward. That meant I’d have to go back to watching. There were too many ways this could go wrong. I’d wanted to break her perfectly, but things had a tendency to fissure in multiple places, in ways you might not be able to predict or prepare for.

One day, she said. I’d cling to that ‘maybe’ with a death grip. The question that remained was what I planned to do going forward. If I continued seeing her as my other self, I didn’t know if it would help or hinder the situation. She was keeping the whole thing to herself, hiding it, even from me. Did that mean she didn’t trust me to protect her or was she trying to keep me safe? Further than that, did it mean that she was beginning to trust Erebus? And if she was, would she be angry or relieved when she learned the truth?

Chapter 30

Alana

Staring out of my bedroom window, I couldn’t rid myself of the question I’d been asking too much lately. Was he out there?

Erebus seemed to know everything and he was around when I least expected it. I wondered where he stationed himself when he didn’t want to be seen. How often did he watch me? Did he know my every move?

Admitting my feelings for Jayce yesterday scared me for more than one reason. There was the obvious, then there was Erebus. He’d threatened him already, which was part of why I didn’t involve Jayce in what was going on anymore. I couldn’t put him in danger and I didn’t know what my stalker was capable of. If he knew what I felt, how my heart ached for that man, what would he do?

Maybe he already knew considering he seemed omniscient. If he did, though, I’d imagine he would want me to stay away from him altogether. The only person he explicitly forbade me from seeing was Mike, which still pissed me off. He had a crush, but he was respectful enough to be my friend. He didn’t pose any danger to me.

That thought beget another. Erebus meant to show me why I shouldn’t trust Mike. It was Friday afternoon and I still hadn’t seen or heard from him.

Any sane person would be glad. I didn’t want my stalker contacting me or showing up. That was the dangerous thing, not Mike or my feelings for Jayce. Yet, there was a part of me that felt, I don’t know, offended by his silence. Maybe he was bored of me or decided I wasn’t worth all the time and effort it took to invade my life.

Good riddance. But, stupid bitch that I was, I pulled out my phone.

Alana: Did karma finally strike you down?

Read. That was immediate. No bubbles popped up, though. Was it dumb that I felt rejected?

“Shit,” I muttered, leaning my hands on the windowsill. I rested my forehead against the glass and willed myself to get a grip.

Stalker bad. Reality good. I might have to make it my new mantra.

My body reacted to Erebus in ways that I hated. He’d forced pleasure from me, ripped it out of my grasp and played me like a puppet. When he was here yesterday, it was different. Seeing him on my balcony awoke a hellish sort of excitement. I was wet at the thought of him touching me before I’d even closed the door on Mike.

It was disgusting. In my grief, I’d somehow latched onto the obsession of a psychopath. Wasn’t that the thing, though? That sort of all-consuming feeling could be intoxicating. Addicting. It blazed with white hot flame, igniting passion and irrefutable need. Fire also burned. It killed.

I shoved aside the memories of Jake that arose every time I thought about fire. I didn’t want him in my head right now. Whether I was with Jayce or Erebus, Jake didn’t belong. He was my past, yet he haunted me when I was alone. When Erebus had his hands on me, all of that disappeared. There was panic, sure, but there was also a welcome silence in my head. He erased my former life while he was around and I craved that. I craved him.

Heat ignited between my legs along with the pulse of my arousal. I thought about the way he’d put his mouth on me yesterday with no revulsion. He wanted to drink from my pussy, blood and all, and from the way he’d groaned as he did it, I knew he’d enjoyed it. He was sick and twisted. And I was worse because I wanted him to do it again.

My breath fogged the glass as I focused on that feeling in my core. Swallowing hard, I lifted one hand off the sill and slipped it into my jeans. Just a brief touch on my clit made me whimper. Closing my eyes, I imagined that creepy neon mask, lit up in the dark and poised above me while he thrust into me. He was large enough that it stretched me to the point of pain when he first entered me.

I imagined the way his body felt under my hands. He was solid muscle, his skin soft without too much hair. His shoulder blades were sharp and when he fucked me, he rippled with strength and power. If he wanted to, he could break me with hardly any effort. It made his soft touches feel like gifts.

My lips parted and a moan left me. Moving my finger back and forth over my clit, I imagined that Erebus was out there right now, watching me touch myself. It didn’t matter that somebody else could catch a glimpse of me in the window. I wanted him to see me taking control of my own body. I wanted him to wonder if I was thinking about him and to feel angry if he thought I might be imagining somebody else.

With a jolt, I let pleasure wash over me. Fire and electricity erupted between my legs and my knees wobbled with the fierce sensations. Once it began to fade, the guilt started to creep in.

God, what was wrong with me? All of my neighbors could have seen my display. I snapped the curtains closed and breathed heavily.

This was when I should start therapy. There was no way I’d admit all of this, though, so it was pointless. Poor, traumatized little Alana with all of her issues. I didn’t really care what science said about me. In my opinion, Ben turned out worse than me with his illegal activities, so all in all, I was doing fine.

I’d been going back and forth about reaching out to him. Our relationship was weird. It always had been. After our parents were arrested, we grew even further apart. I’d never been sure why, but I couldn’t bring myself to care enough to fix it.

With a muttered curse, I pulled out my phone. I put it on speaker and sat on the edge of the bed.

“Lana?” he answered, sounding unsure.

“Yeah, it’s me.”

“Damn. I thought it must’ve been a butt dial.”

“Nope. It was intentional.” I gripped the sheet tightly and took a deep breath. “How… how are you?”

“Good. Business has been great. Bean is keeping me busy.”

“Bean?”

“My three-legged cat. You haven’t seen him on my Instagram?”

I didn’t follow him. Honestly, I didn’t even know he had an Instagram, let alone a cat. It seemed weird that a cat was keeping him busy. Didn’t they do their own thing most of the time?

“I don’t use a lot of social media,” I replied dismissively.

“Right, yeah. You probably have better things to do. Bettering the children of America, protecting them from stray bullets and all that.”

I frowned but decided not to humor him. “So, have you talked to Jayce lately?”

There was an unnaturally long silence on the other end. “No. You?”

My teeth ground together. If he felt the need to lie about it, whatever deals they’d been striking with each other must not have been good. Then again, Ben was notoriously secretive. It was possible he wouldn’t betray Jayce even if he’d just bought some Cuban cigars from him.

“Ben, I know he changed those grades for you.”

“Fuck. What do you want?”

“I just want to know why. What’d he need from you?”

“Look, Lana. My business rides on me respecting people’s discretion. Doesn’t matter if it’s the guy my sister’s in love with.”

I scoffed. “I’m not.”

“Whatever. I just can’t do it.”

“I’m scared, Ben. It’s dangerous.”

“It was just some grades.”

“He shouldn’t be involved with you at all,” I shouted. “Now I’m in the middle of it and I don’t want to end up burned because you can’t keep your hands out of the cookie jar.”

“He’d never let anything happen to you, trust me. He’s done worse to protect you.”

My brow furrowed. “What does that mean?”

“Nothin’. Just stop worrying so much. Look, I gotta go. I have a client who needs me to track some shit down for them.”

“Of course you do.”

“Climb off your fucking high horse, Lana. And…”

“What?”

“Just be careful. There’s more than one person who doesn’t like the company you keep. I worry too.”

I opened my mouth to respond, but the call disconnected. My stomach was twisting itself in knots. What did my brother know? The only ‘he’ I could think of was Erebus. If my brother was aware of him, why hadn’t he told me earlier?

Shit. They could know each other. It would make sense how Erebus knew so much. But this was my brother. There was no way he’d condone all the things that had happened. Maybe he didn’t know the details. Regardless, I wanted to go to his place and beat him over the head until he told me everything.

I was disgusted by the idea that Ben could be in league with Erebus. Was it about revenge? It wasn’t my fault that our parents had been arrested, but it was my friend I’d invited over that night. It was she who recorded what happened and posted it online.

Did Ben blame me?

Fuck him. It sucked, but our parents deserved prison. Alcohol and drugs were their vices and they took it out on each other with their fists, sometimes knives. We’d both been hit our fair share and if they hadn’t been arrested, they probably would have killed each other at a certain point.

I was about to thrust my phone into my pocket when it vibrated. Great. Just what I needed.

My stomach bottomed out when I saw a message from Erebus.

Erebus: You’re a tease today.

Alana: Got your attention.

Erebus: Is that what you wanted? Hate must have a different meaning to you.

Chewing on my lip, I felt another wave of shame. He was right. I told him I hated him. No, I did hate him.

Alana: Hate still applies. I was thinking about a much better dick than yours. Did you see how hard I came?

When he didn’t respond right away, I second-guessed my message. Taunting the stalker was a stupid move. Apparently, I was really damn stupid.

Erebus: Buckingham Lake Park. Stay in your car.

Alana: Why?

Erebus: I owe you something.

I had no idea what could be at that park. If I didn’t go, he’d probably come drag me out of here by my hair. Or worse.

Grabbing a sweatshirt, I headed out the door. Maybe he was ready to spill some of his secrets. Was I ready to learn them?

Chapter 31

Jayce

She didn’t even hesitate to leave the house when I told her to. I watched her jog down the stairs and hop into her car as if she was going for a nice drive instead of following the instructions of a dangerous man in a mask. I loved her but damn, she was easy to manipulate.

As I drove toward the park, I thought about what I’d seen in that window. She claimed she was thinking about someone else, but I knew it was me. One of me. I didn’t care which, just that it was my cock she imagined riding. She’d left the house so quickly, her pussy must still be soaked. Fuck, I wanted to taste it.

Shifting in my seat, I focused on the task at hand. Unfortunately, it was going to be a really bad day for her. The plus side was that she’d need comfort, and who did she call when that happened?

When she pulled into the parking spot, I headed to the other side of the lot. I parked next to a big truck, which effectively kept my vehicle out of view well enough. I raised my hood and got out, settling behind a tree casually. From here, I could see the playground and her car and hopefully, I didn’t look too creepy.

Pulling out my phone, I navigated to the picture Ben found for me. It was always nice when people had their phones set up so that everything transferred to the cloud. Every photo Hailey had taken for the past five years was accessible if you knew the right person to dig it up for you.

I pressed send, then looked at Alana. It was hard to see much of her expression, but I could tell she was staring at the phone. She probably didn’t understand why I’d sent her a picture of Hailey, Alicia, and Jake. She was also angry, most likely. I hoped she wasn’t crying.

Turning to the playground, I spotted Mike and Alicia. They always came here on Saturdays and I’d been banking on them showing up today, even though it was a holiday weekend. I was glad he seemed to be a creature of habit. Judging by his expression, he wasn’t having a great time.

I discreetly snapped a picture and sent it to her. My phone buzzed almost immediately, but it wasn’t a text. Putting in one earbud, I connected the call and prepared my special accent.

“Hello, beautiful.”

“What the hell are you playing at?” she demanded shakily.

“No game this time. Just cold, hard facts.”

“No, no, no. You’re doing something. I don’t…”

She trailed off and I glanced toward her car. Alana was leaning forward in her seat, appearing locked onto something.

“You see them for yourself, don’t you?”

“That’s…” Her breath hitched. “That’s not her. It’s not Jake’s kid. I… You’re wrong.”

Before I could reply, her door swung open. Instinctively, I stepped forward, but I couldn’t rush up to her now. Not like this.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

She ignored me. I rushed back to my car to grab my mask and slid it over my face. Since it was the holiday weekend and it was pretty cold out, there were only a few people around and they were all at the park already. The lot was blessedly empty. I took off at a sprint, reaching her just before she stepped onto the path.

I wrapped my arm around her from behind and clamped my other hand over her mouth before she could scream. She thrashed and made garbled sounds. It was going to draw attention if I didn’t get her out of here quickly. Glancing behind me to make sure nobody else had pulled in, I lifted her off the ground and carried her back to her car.

After throwing the back door open, I tossed her inside. I followed after her, blanketing her body with mine so that she couldn’t make a break for it.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” I demanded.

Her eyes were wild with rage. They shone with unshed tears and it was enough to make me relax slightly.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, brushing her cheek with my thumb.

“Get off of me,” she cried. “Let me go.”

“You can’t confront him like that. Not only will it cause a scene, but it could complicate the case.”

“The case. I don’t give a shit about that.”

“You should. She’s not your kid and you have no obligation to her, but this means something to the others. You know that. Do you want to go out there and scare the shit out of her right now?”

Alana’s lip trembled. She turned away from me as a tear trickled down her face. I wanted to kiss it away, but I was trapped behind this fucking mask.

“It’s time to face reality, Alana. Hailey fucked you over, Jake cheated and lied to you, and Mike tried to use you.”

Her eyes met mine and narrowed. “Why are you doing this?”

“I’m not the monster here.”

“Of course you are,” she hissed. “You’ve known all along. How fucking long is that, Erebus? How long have you watched me?”

“A while.”

She let out a dry laugh that was bordering on maniacal before she slammed her hands into my chest. “While I was with Jake? Did you watch him fuck me, Erebus?”

Fury heated my body. “No, I couldn’t stand to see you that disappointed.”

“You don’t know anything.”

“I know everything.”

“Are you paying Ben to tell you about me?”

I reared back, blinking slowly as I processed her question. She watched me, looking smug as if she’d accomplished something.

“Who the hell is Ben?” I asked.

“Oh, don’t patronize me. You know ‘everything’, which means you know who he is. He told me.”

Leaning down, I pressed the plastic against her face. “What could he have possibly told you, baby? I don’t fuck with low-level criminals. He was probably drunk. Like father, like son.”

She shrieked and beat against my back. Locking my hand around her throat, I took away her air. Her eyes went wide and her assault slowed as she recognized that she was at my mercy. She’d become comfortable with me. Too comfortable. In this form, it was too dangerous to let her gain the upper hand.

“Remember what I told you, Alana. I am your savior. You have no idea what I’ve done to protect you. Maybe a ‘thank you’ is in order.”

Her jaw clenched and the fire in her eyes remained as she reached up to grab my wrist and attempted to remove my hand. I couldn’t help but laugh at the effort.

“You won’t give it to me. I guess I’ll have to take it.”

I continued to grip her throat, watching the panic take over. She kicked her legs and tried to scratch me. When her strength dwindled, her lips parted in a silent plea she never got the chance to make. Her eyes rolled back just before her body went limp.

I released her and got out of the car, then settled in the driver’s seat. Putting it in reverse, I whipped out of the spot and headed for the road. She wanted to play stupid fucking games. We could play.

*****

They say that obsession grows, that it morphs into something dangerous and uncontrollable. I don’t know if that’s true. Things had been this way for a long time and I hadn’t done anything horrible.

Killing Jake might have changed that, but what else was I supposed to do? He wasn’t good for Alana. I was protecting her. Could someone really say that was so bad?

Preston was a dick and he didn’t deserve to exist for another day, another opportunity for him to be a bane to women everywhere.

Those things weren’t horrible. I didn’t even see them as wrong. Putting Alana above everything else in this world was the definition of our love. It was a pursuit that defied law and reason. If something was bad for her, I’d get rid of it.

I looked at her limp form on the floor. Just yesterday, I decided I needed to be hands off as Erebus, but I was already screwing up. Once I got her to my place, I stuck her with something that would knock her out more than some choking. I couldn’t have her waking up before I got her into the basement. She’d never been down here because she claimed that every basement had bad shit in it. She wasn’t wrong, but I digress.

Now, it was just a matter of waiting. I’d already been standing around for an hour and I was getting antsy. Some people had no respect for other people’s time.

Finally, my phone buzzed, showing that someone was at the door. I climbed the stairs, then straightened my clothes so as not to rouse suspicion.

“Ben,” I said cheerily when I opened the door.

He raised a brow. “Hey, man. Sorry it took me so long. There was traffic.”

I knew there wasn’t, but it didn’t matter. I motioned for him to come in and he didn’t hesitate.

He trusted me. Mistake.

Whatever bullshit he’d fed Alana made her doubt me. She was already unhappy about the real me working with her brother, so when I thought about it, I realized that he was a problem. What did we do with problems?

“Let me show you why I brought you here,” I said, heading for the basement door.

“You got any beer?” He opened the fridge and grabbed one. I huffed, waiting for him to uncap it. After a long swig, he followed me.

With every step down the stairs, my heart thumped against my chest a little too hard. Jake was close to home and killing him had been a risk, but I was never a suspect. It was possible that Ben would arouse suspicion, but at the same time, he was a criminal. If he disappeared, they’d discover what he was up to and probably determine that it was a disgruntled client. After I was done, I’d have to make sure there were no records of any business we’d done together. That would fuck things up.

“This is cool,” he noted. “Is it finished down here?”

“Mostly.”

We reached the bottom and turned to the left. The hospital bed was in its usual place with plastic covering it. He stopped, his brow furrowing as he stared at it. When he looked down and saw Alana, he let out a startled sound.

“Jayce, what the hell?” He knelt beside her and put two fingers to her neck.

“Shh,” I said, coming up behind him.

He tensed, but it was too late. My arm wrapped around his neck, locking him into a chokehold. When I dragged him upward, he kicked his feet out.

“Relax. You know I’d never hurt your sister.”

“Jayce,” he choked out.

“You, of all people, know what happens when someone gets in my way, Ben. You didn’t even flinch when I asked you to help me kill Jake. I think it’s because you know I’m better for her.”

He shook his head as much as he could manage. The fight was going out of him. All the adrenaline in the world couldn’t give him enough strength to escape me.

“Everything could’ve been fine, Ben. Nothing had to change between us, but you know too much and you were dumb enough to drop hints. Now, you’re a liability. The thing about being a criminal is that she won’t even be surprised when you go missing. You didn’t talk for three years, man. How hard do you think she’ll push the cops to find you?”

A faint whimper left his lips. I leaned close to his ear.

“Not very hard. Thanks for getting me here. Your sister owes me some words of gratitude, so let’s get on with this.”

Shifting my arm, I jerked it quickly to the side. His body went limp immediately. I dragged him over to the bed and hoisted him into it, then cocked my head as I stared at him.

Okay, maybe things had gone downhill a bit.

Chapter 32

Alana

It smelled like… woodchips? And grass, maybe. I wondered if I was still at the park. Those scents would fit.

When I woke up, I immediately remembered what had happened. I definitely should have been more freaked out, but I figured that if Erebus wanted me dead for my outburst, he would have killed me. There might have been worse things than death, yet I still didn’t feel as unnerved as I should have.

Maybe I was broken. Like, well and truly broken, fucked in the head, loony toons. Maybe I got into drugs after Jake died and I was actually having the worst trip of my life. It would be a really long trip, but time probably felt different when you were high as balls.

With a groan, I rolled onto my back. There were lights set into a ceiling, so we weren’t outside. The floor was smooth and solid; not concrete. Maybe marble.

My first, very unwelcome thought was that concrete was porous, so it sucked in terms of blood spillage. A floor like this would clean up easily and it could be scrubbed nicely with bleach. No little spaces for bodily fluid to get trapped and give away your secret serial killer status.

That was enough of that.

I sat up straight and was surprised that I didn’t feel woozy. Waking up from being choked half to death wasn’t as bad as I’d expected.

There was a creak like a door opening, then heavy footsteps. I scrambled backward and ran into something. With a pained cry, I turned around. Was that a hospital bed? Oh, he was definitely a serial killer.

“Erebus?” I called.

He reached the bottom of the stairs, mask on and probably ready to kill. In hindsight, I shouldn’t have mouthed off to him. I got too comfortable. This was a punishment.

My eyes burned as I wrapped my arms around my knees. “Are you going to kill me?”

“Is that a joke?”

“It’d be a really bad joke.”

“I agree.”

“Why’d you bring me to your villain’s lair? This is kidnapping, you know.”

He chuckled darkly, then strode toward me. I crab walked backward, maneuvering around the bed so that I could reach the wall. It was dumb because it left me with nowhere to go. He crouched in front of me and gently grabbed my chin.

“Kidnapping, Alana? You belong to me. Besides, I just had to do something here and I didn’t want to leave you alone.”

“Cool. So, take me home.”

“I brought you to my home and you don’t even want to look around? I thought you’d have questions. Maybe you can uncover all of my secrets.”

My eyes shifted from one side of the room to the other. There was a wall next to the staircase that looked a little different than the others. I scanned every inch of it and I could’ve sworn I saw the tiniest of grooves. Was it a secret door? That’d be impressive, but I couldn’t imagine what horrors he’d need to hide behind it.

He followed my gaze. “So observant,” he mused, running his fingers over my cheek. “Yet so blind to the things right in front of you.”

“I want to go home.”

“Okay. First, though, you still owe me that ‘thank you.’”

Grinding my teeth together, I angled myself away from his touch. “You haven’t done anything worthy of it.”

“God, you’re stubborn.”

“Where are you from? Ireland?”

“Sure.”

He stood but didn’t back up. As he stared down at me, my mouth went dry. Even though I couldn’t see his face, I knew something was going through his head that I wouldn’t like.

I dropped my gaze and saw the clear outline of his dick inside his jeans. He was hard. Was it just from being near me? My breaths picked up and my mouth went from dry to salivating.

His head cocked before he unbuttoned his pants. I tried to scoot back more, but I was already against the wall. When I dove to the side, he grabbed me by the hair and yanked me back, making me cry out at the sting in my scalp.

“Stop fighting me,” he said softly. His tone didn’t match the grip he had on my hair.

With his other hand, he pushed two fingers into my mouth. Because this was a godless existence, I sucked on them. He groaned, the sound so deep and throaty that it made me clench my thighs together.

“That’s it.” He unzipped his pants and pulled his dick free. I’d almost forgotten how big it was. “Can you be a good girl for me today?”

“What if I say no?”

“I can strap you to that bed and use you as I please.”

That shouldn’t have made me ache. With a small shake of my head, I reached for his dick. He sucked in a breath when I stroked the smooth skin, all the way to the base and back up. Stepping forward, he pressed the head against my lips. I met his eyes- or rather, the X’s where they should’ve been- and opened my mouth. He wasted no time thrusting to the back of my throat, making me gag violently.

He pulled back and moved at a gentler pace after that. I kept my hand on him, stroking him back and forth along with my mouth. Leaning forward, he braced one hand against the wall and threaded his fingers through my hair with the other. It wasn’t rough like before. It was loving and tender in a way that made me want to give him pleasure, to please him.

Every sound he made drove me on. He didn’t hold back his moans or sharp inhales. Each of them made me feel a strange sense of pride because I was drawing them from him. I’d never been so invested in this before. The only one I’d ever given oral to was Jake and it was nothing like this. It was a task, something to get done so that he’d be happy, but the way I wanted to make Erebus feel was different. It was more.

Sick or not, I was getting off on it. Wetness pooled between my legs and the ache in my core became a need, demanding and nearly painful.

As if he could sense what I felt, he said, “Touch yourself.”

With one hand, I scrambled to undo my jeans. I rose further up on my knees and shimmied them down enough for me to slip my fingers between my legs. They were enveloped by heat and quickly became slick with my arousal. I moved my hips, grinding against my fingers, but it didn’t feel like enough. Even when I slipped them inside of me, I wasn’t satisfied.

Pulling back, I took a gasping breath. “Please.”

“Please what?”

“I need more.”

“What are you asking for?”

I dropped my gaze, furrowing my brow as I tried to figure that exact thing out. Lust made my mind hazy and all I could think about was that need. But what did I want?

“You,” I replied simply. It was the only thing that sounded right.

He stood there for a few moments, just looking down at me. I didn’t know if he’d been breathing that heavily before or not. Suddenly, he grabbed my throat and pulled me to my feet. Instinctively, I grabbed his wrist, but I didn’t have to fight him because he released me, only to pick me up and carry me to the bed.

He sat down and settled me in his lap. I maneuvered the rest of the way out of my jeans, then moved my hips so that I could grind on his shaft. The slickness made me slide against him smoothly and we both groaned.

“Don’t forget this moment,” he said breathily. “You begged for my cock, Alana. There’s no going back as soon as you sit on it.”

I stared at the glowing X’s. My legs trembled with the effort to hold myself up when all I wanted to do was take him as deep as he could go. But now I was scared.

He ran a hand through my hair. “What’s going on up here?”

“I want to see you,” I whispered, reaching out to run my fingers over the mask. “Without all this.”

“Why?”

“You’re making these declarations, expecting me to go along with them when I don’t even know who you are.”

He cupped the sides of my neck with both hands. “It’s not important right now.”

“It is because as stupid as it is, I don’t think that I hate you. I might fucking like you, which is completely insane. I know that, but my body doesn’t seem to care. And if you have a horrifying face under all of that, maybe I’ll come to my senses and hate you again.”

The laugh that left him made my stomach somersault. It felt real, more real than I let myself believe Erebus was most of the time. He was fake, the shadow that crept along the outskirts of my actual life. Something about the way he laughed just now made me lean closer. I might have slipped a little further off the edge of my sanity.

Regardless of all the fucked up things he’d done to me, he’d protected me from Mike. He seemed to have my best interests at heart, even though his methods were monstrous at times. Who was he and what was his end goal?

“So,” he said, still sounding amused. “If I’m ugly, you’ll hate me, but if I’m hot, you won’t.”

“I don’t know. I’m grasping at straws here.”

“Stop grasping and ride my cock.”

“But…”

He gripped my hips and guided me down. My lips parted when his head slipped inside of me. It stung while also making me want more.

Flattening my palms against his chest, I eased myself further onto him. I stared down at his dick as it disappeared inside of me. Once I’d taken him to the base, he sat up and wrapped his arms around my waist. I hated that he was wearing the mask and hood, but I knew it wouldn’t do any good to say it again, so I just buried my face in his shoulder and lifted off of him. When I sunk down again, he tightened his grip on me.

“Nobody has ever felt the way you do,” he said.

The softness of his voice made me feel the same way as his laugh had. I pushed past it, trying to focus on what was in front of me.

“Let me see your face.”

I shook my head. “Let me see yours.”

He groaned when I began to move faster. “And what would happen then?”

There was no right answer to that, so I didn’t say anything.  He met my descent with an upward thrust, forcing a cry from my lips. He did it again, reaching so deep that I felt like I’d break. His fingers dug into my hips before he flipped me onto my back. I wanted to protest, but he fucked me so hard and fast that I couldn’t form words if I tried.

“Erebus.”

He didn’t acknowledge me. Wrapping his arms around my legs, he pulled me closer so that my ass was nestled against his thighs and my ankles were over his shoulders. Every thrust made me dig my nails deeper into his legs as I held on for dear life.

I wanted to go back to what we were doing before, the sweet and loving touches, but he’d switched on me. There was a desperation to his movements that frightened me while also making me compliant. I wanted him to get what he needed, even if it ended up shattering me.

His hand moved between my legs and he used his thumb to circle my clit. My pussy clenched around him with the beginning of my orgasm. His rough movements somehow became more powerful and I was caught off guard by how hard I came. Dropping his head back, he bared his throat to me as he stilled, his dick twitching as he filled me with his cum. Something peaked out of the top of his sweatshirt, a hint of ink, barely enough to even notice.

His chin dipped as he rode out the last of the orgasm. Whatever I thought I’d seen faded away with the exhaustion that overcame me. My pussy ached and it was still quivering around his semi-hard shaft. He pulled back and I felt liquid pour out of me. After swiping his fingers through it, he brought it to my mouth. I was too tired to protest, so I just parted my lips and let him drag our cum over my tongue.

My eyes fell shut and I knew it wouldn’t be long before I was out cold. Maybe it should’ve scared me to fall asleep in this place- with him- but it didn’t. I felt safe, sheltered, protected.

“Thank you,” I murmured.

Lips pressed against my temple, then my mouth. “I love you, Alana. Always.”

Maybe I dreamed that part. I must have because there was no Irish lilt to the words. The way he said my name didn’t sound like Erebus at all.

Was it Jake? Sleep-addled delusions. That was all.

Chapter 33

Jayce

Swiping a hand down my face, I stared at Alana from the doorway. She’d mostly stayed asleep on the car ride back to her place. Even when she roused, she’d look over at me, smile, then lay her head down again.

Wasn’t that insane? She saw this damned neon mask and she fucking smiled. She chose to sleep around Erebus, to trust him while she was most vulnerable.

It felt like I was being cheated on. Was I fucking jealous of myself? I wanted to claim that sparkle in her eyes that she had after I made her cum. I wanted to keep my arms around her so that the feeling never went away. She should be able to look at my face, to see how happy she made me.

I was losing the plot. If I wasn’t careful, she was going to fall in love with the part of me that she didn’t understand, the one I had to give up at some point. Maybe she was already getting there. She didn’t know a fucking thing about Erebus. It made no sense that she could run into his arms.

But why wouldn’t she? He was the one who made her feel something after she’d been empty for so long. The life was drained out of her and she couldn’t even make herself orgasm because she was so depressed, then he came along and changed that. He protected her from Mike and showed her the truth. Jayce hid things from her. He knew about Alicia and didn’t tell her. He knew about Hailey and kept it from her.

God, I’d fucked up. I’d put the wrong parts of me into this masked version. Now, I had to find a way to fix it. Yesterday, I decided that I’d back off as Erebus. That was what needed to happen. She couldn’t talk to him anymore. He would have to disappear and when she felt abandoned again, I’d pick her up, dust her off, and fill her to the brink with love. We’d move past all of this the way we were meant to.

She rolled onto her stomach and turned her face toward me. Her eyes were still closed and her lips were parted. The way her cheek was squished made it look like she was pouting. I wanted nothing more than to crawl in bed with her and hold onto her until I felt less broken, but I couldn’t. I had to go to Ben’s place tonight and make sure there was no trace of our business dealings. I didn’t think he’d be reported missing for a while, but in the off chance he had actual friends out there, that assumption could be wrong.

Killing him might have been impulsive, but there was no going back now. Alana would think he just ran off. If she did suspect that he was dead, she’d assume it was from his own business mistakes. All’s fair in love and war.

Since my car was still at the park, I had to order a ride to pick it up. By the time I got there, I was incredibly tired. Between work and everything I was doing with Alana, I hadn’t been sleeping enough. Maybe that was why things were falling apart. I couldn’t keep up.

I just had to do this one thing at Ben’s place, then I’d sleep. It was the weekend, so there was plenty of time.

*****

The sound of my phone ringing made me feel absolutely murderous. When I opened my eyes, the sun seared straight through them. I thought it was going to burn a hole in my retinas. To top it off, Alana was calling me. Not me, but Erebus.

I was livid.

After ignoring the call, I swung my legs over the bed and dropped my face into my hands. Judging by the time I’d glimpsed on my phone, I’d only gotten six hours of sleep, which would be fine under normal circumstances, but I’d been ready to set aside the entire weekend for rest. I already knew I wouldn’t be able to force myself back to sleep, so my Saturday wasn’t looking great already.

The phone rang again, making me groan. Don’t tell me she got attached just because we had an intimate moment. Seriously, the guy wouldn’t show her his face, he’d choked her until she passed out in her car and drugged her in his basement. She should’ve been blocking him, calling the police, and going into witness protection.

Those things wouldn’t be good for me, but I was starting to actually worry. If she was this easy to manipulate, I needed to keep a more watchful eye on her. Mike weaseled his way into her life with hardly any effort. I should’ve known she needed better protection.

Grabbing the phone, I called her back from my own number.

“Oh my god, Erebus-”

“Who’s Erebus?” I asked, wincing at the gravel in my voice.

There was a long pause. “Oh, Jayce. Sorry. I thought someone else was… What’s up?”

“Just calling to check in. I miss you.”

“I miss you too.” Her tone had softened, but there was still a note of panic in her voice.

“You okay? You sound frazzled.”

“Yeah, I’m good.”

“Are you sure? I’m not doing anything, so if you want me to come over, I can.”

“No. It’s fine.”

I ground my teeth together. That was one way to piss me off. The only way I was going to figure out what was wrong was through my alternate self, the one who I’d decided to put away.

Fuck.

“We should get coffee,” I suggested.

“Yeah, totally. We can do that tomorrow.”

Gripping the phone tightly, I pulled it away from my ear and took a deep breath. When I brought it back, I put on as much cheer as I could.

“Cool. I’ll pick you up at ten.”

“Perfect.”

“Love you, Alana.”

“I love you too.”

After we hung up, the phone immediately started ringing again. I dropped onto my back and shook my head. Instead of answering, I sent her a text.

Erebus: Busy. What do you want?

Alana: I need you.

Erebus: Why?

Alana: What’s up with the attitude?

Whatever. Mike showed up at my door.

I sat up straight and let out a growl. Suddenly, I remembered what my dad had told me. Mike was supposed to get served this weekend, which led me to believe that this wasn’t a friendly house call. I hit redial and put the phone on speaker while I hunted for clothes.

“It’s about fucking time,” Alana shouted.

“Tell me what happened.”

“He showed up and I didn’t answer the door, but maybe I should have. Is he going to kill me or something?”

“Calm the fuck down.”

“Why are you being so rude? Shouldn’t you be jumping for joy that I’m trying to talk to you?”

“No. If you don’t tell me exactly what happened, I will drive to his house and put a knife through his fucking skull, Alana.”

She sucked in a breath and I took a moment to compose myself while she probably did the same.

“Just come over and I’ll tell you,” she said softly.

Closing my eyes, I leaned against my closet door. “I can’t.”

“You can stalk me and show up on my balcony, in my room, in my fucking closet, but you can’t come over when I need you? I guess you really are just a deranged stalker who confused obsession with caring about me.”

“You’re kidding, right?”

“Does it sound like I’m kidding, Erebus?”

I laughed, dropping my face into my palm. “Of all the people in your life, you’ve decided to get attached to me. Do you understand how insane that is? I’ve hurt you. I’ve tied you up, tattooed your pussy, watched you sleep, I fucking raped you, and you want me to come over and listen to your problems.”

“I…”

“Ignore the goddamn teacher. When he doesn’t get what he wants, he’ll leave you alone. In the meantime, find something else to cure your loneliness.”

I ended the call and dropped onto the bed. Everything I said made my chest hurt. I didn’t regret a single thing I did to Alana except get too close. Because my lines got blurred, I had to say cruel words to her. I knew they would strike deep. That was why I had to do it.

My original intent was to merge the two parts of me, but this could still work. It was time for me to put her back together and, hopefully, I’d be able to salvage the situation. Erebus was done, put away for good. Now, it was Jayce Weste’s turn.

*****

“How’d the hearing go?” I asked as I set a mug of coffee on the island in front of my dad.

He grunted and took a sip. I could tell from the crease in his brow that it hadn’t gone how he’d wanted. It couldn’t have been a total disaster since he didn’t look angry enough for that. He was never good at hiding his temper when it heated, but he always kept himself from lashing out. He just wore his emotions on his sleeve.

I leaned my elbows on the counter. “That good, huh?”

“That guy, her stepfather, I don’t like him. He’s got this smug look about him, like he’s holding onto a royal flush, but I don’t know what advantage he thinks he has.”

“He’s conceited. I bet his lawyers fed him some bullshit about him having the upper hand.”

“Maybe. This started as a discussion about who will hold Alicia’s estate and now, we’re pursuing custody. He shouldn’t be sitting in that room with a smirk on his face.”

“What happens now?”

“The judge wants us to have visits with Alicia, to establish a relationship. Poor girl. It’ll be so awkward for her at first.”

“She’ll love everyone,” I assured him. “I know you’re worried, but I can’t imagine the judge not allowing you a place in her life, even if it’s not any sort of custody. It was never your decision not to be there for her.”

“After meeting Mr. Everhart, I want more.”

“How much more?” I asked before taking a long drink of my coffee.

“Everything, honestly. I don’t think she should be with some guy who isn’t even related to her. And I know he’s her stepdad and I want to respect that, but… I don’t trust him.”

It was hard not to smile at his reaction to Mike. I agreed with him wholeheartedly. If we wanted to be involved with Alicia, we had to get him out of the picture. Not only was he a snake; he had too much of a connection to both me and Alana. There would always be conflict there.

I wished I could just kill the guy, but it would be too suspicious. On top of that, it would only make things harder. There was no guarantee Alicia would be placed with my parents- not right away, at least. I didn’t want her put into some foster home, even for a day.

“You should fight him,” I suggested. “Hire someone to dig something up on him and go for full custody.”

Dad snorted. “Don’t be ridiculous.”

“I’m serious. I’ll help pay for it.” When he still looked skeptical, I put a hand on his arm. “Let’s be real, Dad. Jake wanted to take Alicia from Mike. Hailey wanted Jake to have her. It’s pretty obvious that she needs to be with us.”

Slowly, he nodded. “You’re right. I know that you’re right. It’s just such a big thing and tomorrow…”

He cut himself off, taking a shuddering breath. I didn’t need him to finish that sentence. Tomorrow was the anniversary of Jake’s death. It was going to be a really bad day and I wasn’t sure where Alana would be on the spectrum of grief. I had to be prepared for anything.

Chapter 34

Alana

He abandoned me. I was shocked by how much it affected me when he said those harsh words over the phone. I’d been pathetic and sent him a couple of texts, but he never responded. They didn’t even show up as read. I was starting to think that he’d blocked me.

How could somebody go from completely obsessed to simply gone? It was ironic, really. I wanted him to leave me alone and now that he had, I was the one missing him. He’d pulled an Uno reverse on me. It was bullshit.

An arm slid around my shoulders, startling me from my thoughts. I smiled weakly at Jayce and leaned into him. He tightened his hold on me and it almost felt like he could make everything okay. Being in his arms was safe. I hated that we hadn’t been in a good place for a while. Maybe that was why I’d become so close to Erebus.

I shook away the thoughts. Today was the anniversary of Jake’s death. I didn’t know why we were all gathered at Jayce’s house. We’d gone to his grave, stood there and said some awkward words to the dirt, and came here. There was food in the kitchen, but none of us had eaten.

To be honest, I didn’t feel as despondent as I’d expected to. I thought this would be the third worst day of my life. The first was when he died. The second was the night after his funeral. It was the most alone I’d felt, after everyone had dropped off their obligatory casseroles and went their separate ways. I’d locked myself away in Jayce’s spare bedroom to stew in my own despair.

Today, though, just felt like a normal day. I might have even felt lighter. It was like that knot in my chest that tied me to Jake had loosened, allowing me to see a future that wasn’t intertwined with his.

I slipped my arm behind Jayce and nestled into his chest. When I inhaled his scent, I found myself wanting more. I wasn’t sure how long we stayed like that. Long enough for his parents to leave and the sun to lower, causing long shadows to stretch across the living room. Neither of us moved, not until the room was dark.

“Do you want to sleep here?” he murmured into the top of my head.

Without thinking too much about it, I nodded. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d slept well. Maybe being here with him would give me the peace of mind that I needed. If I hadn’t been afraid for my safety, I would have tried it earlier. I didn’t think that threat still loomed over us, which offered me a confusing combination of peace and despair.

When he picked me up, I let out a startled sound. He tucked me against his chest and I relaxed into him. That leather and tobacco scent embraced me and I wanted more, so I wrapped my arms around his neck. I nuzzled my nose up against his skin, inhaling. His heart hammered; I could feel it through his pulse point.

Had I been overcomplicating this? My reservations were valid, but after everything that had happened over the past month, it all seemed incredibly trivial.

I loved Jayce. That was never in question. When that had happened wasn’t all that important anymore. We hadn’t been locked in some godforsaken love triangle. It just existed on the outside, a constant we were aware of but wouldn’t address. I had no idea if Jake had known. I doubted it, otherwise he would’ve been extremely insecure about it.

Jayce reached for the doorknob to the guest bedroom and I tightened my grip on him. “Can I sleep with you?”

He froze, pulling in a slow breath. Without saying anything, he turned around and brought me into his room. My heart beat faster when I looked at his king-sized bed. It seemed like an awful lot of space for just one person.

Suddenly, I wondered how many other women had slept here. It wasn’t fair or logical, but I resented that idea. Jayce wasn’t going to wait forever. He was incredible, handsome, and had a good job. I kept pushing him away and turning him down. What the hell was I doing?

He set me on the bed, then settled on his back beside me. My heart beat fiercely against my chest. I didn’t know what I was doing when I sat up. He looked at me curiously, his head cocking. The gesture was familiar. He did it a lot, like a predator assessing its next meal. Was I the prey?

“Alana?”

Without saying anything, I shifted onto my knees, tucking my feet underneath me. He just watched me, those blue eyes assessing. Blue… They were just his eyes. I’d been looking at them for years.

He reached out to put a hand on my thigh. “Alana-”

I grabbed either side of his neck and pressed my lips to his. He cupped my jaw, immediately opening his mouth to me. When my tongue met his, he made a sound that caused my body to react, like it recognized it.

He lifted me onto his lap and deepened the kiss. Straddling his hips, I moaned when his dick hardened against me.

“Fuck, baby,” he groaned. “What are you doing?”

That endearment just rolled off his lips, like he’d said it before. It sounded right and wrong. His words, his kiss, his body… I ran my hands over his shoulders, then thrust my fingers into his hair.

When I didn’t answer him, he turned me onto my back gently and in one smooth motion, he pulled my pants off. My legs fell open and he dropped down between them, looking up at me with something akin to nervousness.

“Is this what you want, Alana?”

I nodded. His eyes blazed with an intensity that made my core throb.

He kissed the inside of my thigh, then sucked on the skin. Continuing like that, he made his way up to my pussy. His tongue flicked my clit and I jolted.

“Promise me something,” he said before he trailed his tongue down to my entrance. “Say my name when I make you cum.”

His fingers plunged inside of me at the same time that he made a long swipe upward. He hooked them at just the right angle on the way out and my back arched. I gasped when he sucked on my clit. It was impossible to catch my breath as he made circles around it, then went back to direct stimulation.

“Jayce,” I pleaded.

He growled against me and combined with the curling of his fingers, it made heat explode inside of me. My pussy clamped down on his fingers and he stopped thrusting them, only using the tips to massage my g-spot. When I felt pressure inside of me, I had a moment of panic.

“Relax,” he breathed against me.

I closed my eyes and released the tension in my body. The feeling intensified to a point where I thought I might explode. He removed his fingers and liquid gushed out of me as a band of pleasure radiated across my core.

“Jayce,” I screamed.

He dipped his head further to taste me. His tongue on my sensitive skin was almost too much, but he held my thighs to keep me from squirming away. When my body finally relaxed, I felt like Jello. He crawled his way up to me, kissing my skin along the way. When he reached my mouth, he thrust his tongue inside, letting me taste what he’d done to me.

“You are so fucking beautiful,” he whispered.

I smiled against his lips. Grabbing the hem of his shirt, I pulled it upward. He threw it to the ground and raised a brow.

“You don’t intend to steal my virginity, do you?”

With a dramatic roll of my eyes, I trailed my fingers over his chest. I’d seen him shirtless, but I’d never let myself fully appreciate the view. I tried to keep stray glances to a minimum lest I become enraptured like I was right now.

I touched the fox on his chest and my fingers trembled. Tracing the lines, I made my way to the tail. It rose higher than the body, curling slightly at the tip. It ended just above his collarbone, just a glimpse of the dark shape.

“You okay?” he asked.

“Yeah,” I replied quickly. When I tried to swallow, my throat felt too dry. “Will you hate me if I say that I need a breather?”

“Of course not. Just this once, though.” He flashed me a playful smile that made my stomach lurch. “I’m gonna make some tea.”

“That sounds incredible. I’ll just go clean up.”

He leaned down to kiss me, slow and sweet. When he stood, he looked uncertain. I smiled at him and his expression relaxed. I put my underwear on and headed into the bathroom while he went to the kitchen.

When I walked into the hallway, I heard him filling a kettle with water. I stopped at a door that I hadn’t ventured through before. I hated basements. They always held vile things. Ghosts, cursed objects, or a serial killer’s lair. The thought made me shudder as I carefully depressed the handle. There was a tiny creak.

Shaking my head, I shut the door. I didn’t want to go down there. There was no reason to. It was probably full of random shit he didn’t need. Demons were another possibility.

“Hey,” he said, making me jump.

Realizing I was still standing in front of the basement door, I took a step back. Jayce was at the entrance to the hallway, his face expressionless. I didn’t know why I felt like I’d been caught. My shoulders tensed when he started toward me.

Cupping either side of my face, he kissed the tip of my nose. “What’s wrong with you?”

“We’ll need a three-day weekend and a shrink to unpack that question.”

With a chuckle, he took my hand and led me to the kitchen. Gripping my waist, he lifted me onto the island. I shivered when the cold counter touched my bare skin. He ran his hands up my thighs, spreading his warmth. Everything else faded away as I wrapped my legs around his waist, tugging him as close as I could.

I reached up to touch his face. He leaned into me, closing his eyes, and he looked so content that I didn’t want to stop. My fingers trailed down his cheeks, then I brushed a thumb over his lower lip. His eyes opened and locked on mine. Not looking away, he took my thumb between his teeth and applied enough pressure to make me gasp.

He was so intense right now. The grip on my thighs was bruising and his eyes seemed brighter. My heart was beating too fast, not only from this excitement he’d awoken. There was a primal quality to his lust; it made me want to run, but mostly so that he could catch me.

As if he saw my intent, he moved his hand to my throat and used it to push me backward. The granite was cold while his skin was hot. He leaned over me and snagged my nipple with his teeth through my shirt. I lifted my legs so that I could put my heels on the edge of the counter. He released my neck and stared down at me. Only my underwear separated us and I wanted them gone, so I raised up a little to get them off.

“Do you know how long I’ve wanted you?” he asked as he squeezed my thighs.

“Since this morning?”

His lips curved upward. My core throbbed at the sight. I wouldn’t be surprised if I was already dripping onto his nice wood floors.

“Since I saw you watching me on that field.”

“You saw me?”

“It didn’t really set in until you were standing in my living room, though. From that first smile, I was done for.”

He yanked me closer to the edge of the counter and I gasped when his dick pressed against me. I hadn’t noticed him take it out, I’d been so focused on his beautiful face.

“Twelve fucking years, Alana. That’s how much time I have to make up for.”

He buried himself inside of me and I dropped my head back. My mouth opened, but no sound came out. His fingers circled my wrists and pulled me into a sitting position. Gripping the back of my neck, he kissed me. God, he fucking kissed me and for a second, I knew that kiss.

It must’ve been the years of longing, all the times I’d imagined his lips on mine. Anything else was just madness. Maybe I had gone mad. He didn’t give me a chance to keep pondering it. Being fucked by Jayce while his blue eyes bore into mine was the epitome of divine intervention and it demanded my full attention, my complete and utter devotion.

He could have all of it. All of me. My wants, my dreams, and my desires were bleeding into him, creating some fucked up symbiotic relationship that would ensure our connection to each other. If it was severed, it would most certainly rip me to pieces.

Chapter 35

Jayce

I was still in shock over what happened three days ago. It was easily the best day of my life. Even though we’d had sex before, to me it was the first time. It was different; better.

She’d come back one day after work, but she refused to stay here every night. That was ridiculous and I was tempted to just have all of her stuff moved here while she was at the school, but I reined it in. There was no urgency. We’d finally made it to this point and I didn’t want to push her too far. If she wanted to take things slow, we could do that. I’d hate every second of it but for her, I would stop time.

My eyes felt heavy and I had to shake my head to keep myself from drifting off at my desk. Work felt tedious today, but I had a deadline to meet and I’d been distracted lately. I often had to remind myself that life was still moving at its normal rate outside of my Jayce-Alana-Erebus ordeal. Finally, I could put some of my energy into other things again.

Who knew you could get burnout from stalking? It was the definition of hard work and dedication.

I was too bleary-eyed for this shit. After closing out of the program, I got to my feet and stretched. I ambled into the kitchen and made myself a triple shot espresso. At this point, I might as well start doing coke, but coffee was cheaper.

Just as I took my first sip, my phone buzzed. Assuming it would be Alana, I checked it immediately. My brow furrowed when I saw the text.

Unknown: I need your help.

Jayce: Who’s this?

Unknown: Alicia. You’re the guardian angel.

I’d almost forgotten that I’d given her my number. I might have been shocked an almost ten-year-old could text, but she was born in 2015, so it made sense. While I typed out a response, I grabbed my boots. I didn’t have a good feeling about this.

Jayce: What’s going on?

Alicia: Mike. Angry.

Jayce: You home?

She sent a thumbs up, which was all I needed. If she felt the need to ask me for help, it must’ve been bad. I could only guess that this had to do with the case. My parents had their first visit with Alicia on Monday and he’d tried to make an appeal the week before to prevent it, but it was shot down.

But why was he angry now? It was Wednesday and it was a half-day for the district, so he’d probably been home for a few hours. I felt more concerned when I thought about Alana. Maybe he tried to talk to her today. I wanted to trust that she’d tell me if he did, but I wasn’t going to lie to myself. Judgment calls were not her strong suit.

I’d deal with her later. Her last text was only half an hour ago, so I knew she was safe. My priority right now was Alicia. Mike’s bad day was going to get a hell of a lot worse if I walked in on something I didn’t like.

*****

From the outside, it looked normal. That was never a good indicator of the things that went down inside. Alana’s parents were lovely when they were in public. In private, they were a shit show. Going to prison was what they deserved for hurting my girl. Just two days before that video, Alana’s dad slapped her so hard that she tumbled down the stairs. She tried to pass off the bruises as a bicycle accident because she didn’t want us to worry, but I got her to tell me the truth when we were alone.

I should’ve just killed the guy, but I was barely sixteen. I hadn’t graduated to that level of protection yet. That sort of thing took time. The me that existed now would turn the bastard into fertilizer. Probably her mom too.

On the way here, I went back and forth about the mask. It was how Alicia knew me, but I didn’t want Mike to be aware of that identity. It looked like she’d be meeting her uncle for the first time. Since they didn’t want to overwhelm her on Monday, she’d only seen my parents and Charlie.

To give him one chance, I knocked on the door. It swung open, revealing a haggard-looking Mike wearing an unbuttoned dress shirt. It smelled like he’d bathed in vodka. What a responsible way to spend the afternoon at home with his stepdaughter.

“What the hell are you doing here?” he demanded. His brows were drawn so tightly that they’d merged into one long caterpillar.

“I need to see Alicia.”

“The fuck you do. Get out of here.”

I shoved on his chest with one hand, making him stumble backward. Stepping inside, I glanced around. There were some broken picture frames on the floor and a half-empty bottle of vodka on the coffee table.

“That’s assault,” he bellowed.

Rolling my eyes, I continued further into the house. “Who’s gonna believe the man who’s drunk at home with a scared nine-year-old?”

“She’s not afraid of me. You don’t know what you’re talking about. Get out of my house before I call the cops.”

I scoffed. “Do it. That’s one less call I have to make.”

“You have no right to be here. When my lawyer finds out-”

“Alicia,” I called. “Where you at, kid?”

I continued down the hall, then stopped at her closed door. Mike’s footsteps thundered behind me. I turned around and grabbed both of his biceps, throwing him against the wall.

“Touch me or her and I will fucking bury you. Don’t make this harder on yourself.”

When I released him, he looked like he wanted to rip my throat out with his teeth, but he didn’t move. Satisfied, I slowly opened Alicia’s door. There was a sharp intake of breath and the covers on the bed moved, concealing her further.

“Alicia, it’s me. You might not recognize me right now, but do you remember my voice?”

She moved the blanket and poked her head out. Her eyes widened, fear taking over her expression.

“Dad?”

Shit. I didn’t think about that part.

“No,” I said softly, coming closer to the bed. When she flinched back, I dropped into a crouch a few feet away to make myself smaller. “I’m Jayce. You know what twins are, right?”

She nodded. “You have the same face.”

“I told you I’m not a stranger. You trusted me before. Can you trust me now?”

“I don’t know.”

“Listen to me, Alicia. Out of everybody in the world, I knew your dad the best. I know how much he’d be willing to do to make sure you’re safe.”

“He wasn’t here. He didn’t want me.”

My shoulders slumped. “He wasn’t here, but he did want you. Sometimes, being afraid makes us do stupid things and those things we do out of fear don’t always reflect who we are. Your dad messed up and I think he was afraid to own up to that. Maybe he was afraid to be your dad too. Do you get what I’m saying?”

“I think so.”

“I know my parents told you why we’ve never met you. None of us can make up for lost time, but believe me when I say that it doesn’t matter whether I’ve known you for years or days. You’re my family and I protect my family. I’ll protect you.”

There were tears in her eyes. I didn’t know if it was from her fear or my words. It didn’t matter. All I knew was that it awoke something familiar in me, the same feeling that made me want to protect all of the people I cared about, and Alicia just made it to the top of that list.

She flung the blanket off and rushed toward me. When she wrapped her arms around my neck, I straightened, holding her as I walked toward the door.

“What are you doing?” Mike roared.

“Do you want to go with me, Alicia?”

“Yes.”

“Are you afraid of him?”

“Yeah.”

Mike continued making threats behind us, but I ignored him. Nothing he said mattered. He was a danger to her, which meant she wasn’t staying. That was all there was to it.

I set her down on the porch and nodded to my Bronco. “Climb in and wait for me. Don’t come out, do you understand?”

She nodded and ran to the truck. When I turned around, Mike’s fist connected with my face. I laughed as blood trickled into my mouth.

“You stupid motherfucker.”

“Sir, they should be arriving any second.”

“Thanks, Pam,” I said to the dispatcher.

Mike’s eyes widened when he looked at my earbud. His gaze traveled over my shoulder where three cruisers pulled up to the curb.

“Just so you know, you reek of booze. What do you think your blood alcohol level is?”

“I’m in my own home,” he spat. “They can’t arrest me for drinking.”

“Maybe they will, maybe they won’t. The fact of the matter is, you were a danger to a child under your care. There’s evidence of violent behavior in the home right now. Alicia can attest to being afraid of you and the dispatch recording has that bit memorialized. Oh, and you assaulted me just now. I could press charges.”

His nostrils flared in and out. Footsteps behind me made me shift to allow the officers in.

“The kid is in the truck,” I said. One of them followed me to my Bronco. “Can she be placed with us?”

He shrugged. “You family?”

“Yeah. My parents are in a custody battle with the step-dad.”

“From other cases I’ve seen like this, when a child is removed from the home, they try to place them with a relative. A social worker will need to get involved, but that’s probably what they’ll do.”

That made me feel a hell of a lot better. “Is he gonna be arrested?”

“We’ll take him in, but I don’t know. They’ll probably release him if he didn’t hurt the kid. You could press charges, though.”

This guy’s life was about to really suck. And I didn’t feel bad for him at all. He touched what was mine. First, he went after Alana. Then, he scared my niece.

Mike was lucky that killing him would rouse too much suspicion. Otherwise, he’d be feeding my plants next summer. My patience was impossibly thin, though, so he’d better keep his nose where it belonged.

Chapter 36

Alana

My stomach was in knots. It was horrible. I thought about turning around and fleeing, but Jayce squeezed my hand. It didn’t get rid of the feeling, but I felt like I could manage.

Alicia had been with his parents for a few days, which resulted in absolute chaos. Nobody had been prepared for it, least of all me. This whole time, I’d been floating around on the outskirts of the issue, distancing myself from it. If I was with Jayce, though, I couldn’t pull away like that. I had to find a way to get through this.

I had this overwhelming fear that I’d see her and the only thing I’d be able to think about was Jake and his betrayals. She was the embodiment of them. All of those secrets and lies. But they were his, not hers, and I had to keep reminding myself of that.

We stepped into the kitchen at his parents’ house and the moment came. Alicia was in front of the stove with Ron, stirring something in a pot. He spoke, then she tipped her head back and laughed.

I braced my hands on the counter and took a deep breath. Jayce rubbed my back softly, not saying anything because he knew nothing would really help.

“Alana,” Charlie greeted as she came into the kitchen. She gave me a quick hug and smiled. “Look at you two. I thought he was never gonna grow the balls.”

“Thanks, Charlie,” Jayce said with narrowed eyes.

“Is it weird?” I asked, quiet enough for the others not to hear.

“No.” With a grimace, she shrugged. “Maybe a little, but it also feels right, you know? I don’t think there’s anyone we’d rather Jayce be with, which might be weirder, but you get it.”

I breathed a laugh. “Your family has always been a little different.”

“Might as well keep the good times rollin’.”

“You might as well buy a wedding dress now,” Jayce murmured in my ear.

My face grew hot at the insinuation. “Let’s not roll that far.”

“Yeah, yeah. You’re all about that slow and steady shit.”

“Not all of us want to charge into things like a raging bull.”

“You’re no fun.”

After throwing him a withering glare, I made my way over to Ron and Alicia. My heart was racing, but I wasn’t going to back down. She was just a kid.

She turned around and my breath caught. She looked so much like them- the blue eyes, her nose, and the color of her hair. I could see Hailey in her too, which I was surprised to feel emotional about. The combination of them, together in one person, didn’t make me feel angry like I’d expected. It was a punch to the gut, sure, but I also felt immediate affection for her. She was a piece of him and I couldn’t be upset that she existed.

“Hi, Alicia. I’m Alana.”

“Both of our names start with A,” she noted with a grin.

“They do. If we’re not careful, we’ll get them mixed up.”

“Did you know my dad too?”

I glanced over at Jayce, who smiled. “Yeah, I knew him for a very long time. Me, Jayce, and your dad were inseparable in high school.”

She leaned in closer. “Were they troublemakers?” she whispered.

With a laugh, I moved my lips to her ear. “They were hellions.”

“Who was worse?”

I hummed thoughtfully. “Your dad. But what you really had to worry about was when they were together.”

Alicia giggled. Jayce came up beside me and slipped an arm around my waist.

“She’s leaving out the most important part.”

“What’s that?” I asked.

“You were the one with all the ideas. The mastermind.”

I shot him a playful smirk. “Prove it in a court of law.”

“Are you guys in love?” Alicia asked.

My mouth opened, but I shut it quickly. I didn’t have to come up with an answer because Jayce laughed and pulled me against him.

“We’re more than in love.” He dipped his head so that he could speak only to me. “I’ve been after you for twelve years, baby. You were mine then and you’re mine now. You always will be.”

“Always,” I whispered. My stomach felt odd when I said it, like I was having a moment of déjà vu. When I tried to grasp whatever hidden memory had been unlocked, it was too fuzzy for me to see clearly.

Jayce pressed his lips to mine, silencing my thoughts.

Suddenly, everything felt okay again.

*****

December was a bitch. The air hurt my face and made me grumpy. I didn’t know why I still lived in New York. This place sucked. Maybe I could convince Jayce that we needed to move.

I stopped walking abruptly. Somehow, in a matter of weeks, we’d reached a place where I was speaking about us as a unit. I’d just imagined us moving somewhere new together. That was insane, yet it didn’t feel wrong.

Rubbing my hands together, I started walking again. I’d have to remember gloves next time. That was something I always forgot. I hated them, though. They were like socks for your hands. I hated socks too.

I reached my car and swung my foot underneath the trunk. The door slowly rose and when I dropped my bags in, I felt a sense of relief. Christmas was two weeks away, which felt like plenty of time, but whenever I said that, I ended up shopping last-minute. This year, I’d done it early. Things were looking up.

A scream left me when I turned around. Putting a hand over my chest, I narrowed my eyes at Mike.

“What are you doing here?” I demanded.

He gestured around the space. “Christmas shopping, just like you.”

“Cool.”

I stepped away from him, but he followed. It was like the moment with Preston in the parking lot, except I feared Mike. Not too long ago, I thought he was sweet and incapable of hurting anyone. I still didn’t think he’d actually attack me or anything, but I had to be wary of him.

“Do you need something?” I asked, trying to sound friendly.

“Actually, yeah. I wanted to talk to you about Alicia.”

My shoulders tensed. “That’s not something I can do. Besides, the case is still going. I can’t get involved.”

“Please,” he insisted. When he stepped forward, I tried not to panic.

“Mike, this really isn’t my business. I’m not part of this.”

“But you can be. Jake wanted you to be.”

“And what would be the point?”

“We can help each other. I just… I want my daughter back.”

His eyes fell to the ground. Part of me softened, but I couldn’t forget that he’d tried to use me. That was before Ron and Sara filed for custody, which meant it was about money. The thought made me sick.

“I’m not going to help you,” I said firmly.

He caught my arm, keeping me from getting into my car. I kicked his knee and he nearly fell, but he maintained his hold on me.

A tall figure appeared behind Mike and wrapped an arm around his neck. He immediately let me go to focus on the new threat. He jabbed his elbows backward, but he was stuck in a chokehold.

“Jayce,” I breathed, both relieved and shocked by his appearance.

He removed his arm and whirled Mike around. When he shoved him into the side of my SUV, I gasped.

“Stop it,” I demanded.

“You don’t fucking touch her,” Jayce growled. His eyes were wild with fury as he stared at Mike. “What’s so hard for you to understand? Cornering Alana… That’s the dumbest move you can make.”

Mike spat at him- brave and incredibly stupid. “We were talking. It’s none of your business.”

“Everything that has to do with Alana is my business.” Jayce flicked his wrist, opening up a very scary knife. When he held it up to Mike’s throat, I stepped toward him.

“Jayce, put that away. What the hell are you doing?”

He glanced at me briefly, then returned his attention to Mike. “I should open you up right here, but your blood doesn’t deserve the legacy of soaking into the concrete.”

Mike sneered at him. “Maybe you should try to send me to prison too since you’re in the habit of that.”

I looked between them, trying to understand what was going on. Jayce’s face had gone colder- unreadable stone. After a moment, he released Mike and stepped back.

“Get the hell out of here before I follow through.”

Mike didn’t hesitate to take off. He raced across the street and got into his car. I watched until it was out of sight, then turned to Jayce, crossing my arms over my chest.

“What was that?”

“He was threatening you,” he replied simply.

“Hardly. It wasn’t enough to warrant a blade to the throat.”

“That’s debatable.”

“Seriously, Jayce. Who does that?”

He stepped into me, backing me up against the car. “I will always protect you. It doesn’t matter how big the threat is.”

I stared at his chest, trying to keep the tears at bay. “What did he mean? About sending him to prison.”

“He’s crazy. He could face jail time depending how his court hearing goes.”

“No, you’re lying.”

I shook my head and tried to move away from him, but he kept me pinned to the car. Pieces were beginning to fall into place in my mind. I didn’t like the picture they formed.

“Hailey,” I whispered.

She swore she didn’t do it, but I thought she was lying. She’d lied to me before. It was her phone, her account that uploaded the video of the fight, capturing the perfect moment when my dad backhanded me hard enough to knock me to the ground.

“Were you there?”

He didn’t answer. The longer he stared at me with no expression, the more exasperated I became.

“Were you in my fucking house that night, Jayce? Did you set her up to take the fall for it? What, you didn’t like that we were friends? Is that it?”

His eyes rolled. I couldn’t believe that shit. What the fuck kind of reaction was that? Fine. We could change the subject. He’d all but given me the answer anyway.

“Why are you here?”

“Shopping.” He ran the back of his knuckles across my cheek. “The perfect woman deserves the perfect gift.”

“You just keep lying to me. I need to go home. Please.”

He waited for another moment, then stepped back. As I got into my car, I tried to ignore him. He was staring so intently, as if my escape wasn’t a move in my favor at all. It made me swallow hard before I pulled away from the curb.

I needed to fucking breathe- away from him and literally everything else out here.

The video thing wouldn’t have even pissed me off all that much. Sure, I’d feel that way at first, but when it came down to it, my parents needed to get arrested. It worked and it had been to protect me.

Attacking Mike was a big no-no, but again, he was protecting me. He wouldn’t actually slit the guy’s throat. This was Jayce we were talking about. My Jayce. He was big and sweet and funny. The look in his eyes a few minutes ago was anything but.

After I parked in front of my apartment, I ran up the stairs, forgetting about the bags for the time being. I headed for my room, but quickly backtracked and glanced both ways in the hallway. It was quiet, just like it had been since the last time I’d seen Erebus when he drove me home from his place. The last time we spoke was on the phone. He’d been an asshole.

Still, the silence didn’t make sense. He was obsessed. That didn’t just go away, right? I might have chalked it up to a guy getting off on fucking with a girl, then leaving when he got what he wanted, but he’d gone too deep for it to be that simple. He knew everything, had gotten into my house, left my favorite candy around…

I thought back to the day he cleaned the bite on my shoulder. He’d known exactly where the alcohol was. Maybe he’d spent time snooping during all of those visits.

After one last glance down the hall, I retreated to my room and shut the door behind me. My hand covered my mouth while I tried to reason this out. Right now, I needed action. The emotional side of this could be dealt with later. It was easier said than done considering my eyes already burned and my mind was fit to fracture.

I didn’t know anything for sure. The more I thought about it, the crazier it sounded.

Chapter 37

Jayce

I may have gone off the rails. Just a tiny bit. The thing is, Mike had become a problem. A big one. I think we’ve learned what happens to problems.

He must’ve known he was in trouble because he was hiding out. I’d pulled a knife on him and he’d seen the crazed look in my eyes. He would have been an idiot if he went home.

Generally I wouldn’t involve anyone else in my less than legal activities, but I didn’t have much of a choice. I couldn’t leave him to his own devices. He could go for Alana again and I couldn’t always be around to protect her. It was pure luck that I’d been keeping an eye on her earlier. She told me I couldn’t come shopping with her because she had to buy my gift. What I heard was that I couldn’t go shopping with her, but I sure as shit could be around. What can I say? I was a little bit obsessed.

I thought the overt obsession would fade somewhat when we finally got together, but I felt more possessive than before. Every day, I was terrified of losing her. It seemed like the sort of bullshit the universe would pull- I’d finally have the woman of my dreams and something out of my control would take her away from me. Not fucking happening.

It was a good thing Mike wasn’t very clever. It was after midnight, but he finally came home. He looked in every direction before he hurried to the front door. If he thought a lock would save him, he was mistaken. I’d already been inside to set up. All he’d done was walk right into my trap.

With my mask and a pair of gloves on, I got out of my truck and walked casually to the door. It only took a minute for me to get it open. After locking it behind me, my gaze moved to the kitchen where a light was on. I leaned against the wall and waited.

Mike turned the corner with a beer in his hand. He stopped abruptly when he saw me standing there. It was dark, so he squinted as if trying to figure out if his eyes were deceiving him. Reaching up, I turned on the mask’s neon lights.

“Jesus,” he exclaimed, stepping back.

“I’ll give you one more guess.”

When I started toward him, he dropped the beer. The glass shattered, skittering across the linoleum. He turned around, aiming for the sliding door. I grabbed him by the back of the neck and hauled him toward the living room. He cried out when he stepped on the glass. By the time I had him where I wanted him, blood had begun to seep through his socks.

“Who are you?” he demanded.

“I told you to guess.”

“Y-you’re Jayce, aren’t you?”

“You can call me Erebus. Right now, I’m not the good guy.”

“What does that mean?” he blubbered.

I grabbed his face with one hand, forcing him to look at me. His eyes were wide with fear and shone with the realization that he was at my mercy. When a tear slipped free, I felt a thrilling sense of satisfaction.

“It means you’ve caught the attention of a monster, Mr. Everhart. And I’m dying to draw blood. That’s not my intent, though.”

He let out a relieved breath. I shook my head with a small laugh.

“There are plenty of terrible things you can endure without losing a single drop of blood. Well, aside from your feet, but that was your fault.”

His face paled. I picked up the rope I’d left near the wall. He tried to back away from me, but unless he planned to crawl up the chimney, he had nowhere to go. I held the noose out to him and he shook his head.

“You don’t have a choice,” I pointed out. “If you don’t do it, I’ll just kill you. Work with me and I’ll give you a chance to… Well, not to redeem yourself because we know that’s hopeless. This is a chance to save your worthless ass.”

His hand shook as he took the noose from me. I tapped my neck and he whimpered as he put it over his head. I grabbed the rope and yanked on it, making him stumble backward. When it was taut, I pulled harder. His feet kicked out as he scrambled for a foothold.

I looked up at the metal beam I’d put in place. It was secured to studs on parallel walls, giving me the perfect spot to hang the bastard. The ceiling fan wasn’t reliable enough, which meant I had to get creative. The police might question it, but people would do weird shit when they felt like offing themselves.

Not yet, though, so I put a small stool beneath his feet and tugged so that the rope slid over the beam, tightening around him. Grabbing my own chair, I stood on it and started securing the rope to the beam. He grunted when he had to stand on his toes and almost lost his balance, but he managed to stay on top of it enough not to die, so lucky him, I guess.

“Do you like Saw?” I asked.

“Saw?” he rasped. His fingers were trying to get between the rope and his neck, but it was too tight with the tension.

“Yeah. Deadly, high-stakes games. You can save yourself, but it’s gonna suck in one way or another.”

“W-why?”

“A test of character, maybe. See, you’ve proven to be more than an asshole. You want to use people to dig yourself out of a hole. Tell me, Mike. Did you kill your wife?”

His eyes widened. “Of course not! She was in a car accident.”

I nodded slowly. “Fair enough. What about Jake? She left him everything and you were angry. That sounds like motive, Mike.”

“You’re insane. I didn’t do anything.”

“Do you think everyone will believe that? I mean, he had everything Hailey owned, Alicia’s estate, and he was trying to get custody. I can see how the guilt for setting that fire would drive you to kill yourself.”

Mike looked up at the beam, realization setting in. “Please, don’t.”

“Relax. I told you I’d give you a chance.”

“Anything. I’ll do anything.”

Turning around, I opened the garage door. When I grabbed my motivator, she screamed. It was muffled by the cover over her head, but it still made me wince. Dragging her into the living room, I forced her onto her knees.

“You wanted to put yourself above Alana, to trick and manipulate her. You would’ve fucked her, wouldn’t you?”

He stared at us in horror as her shoulders heaved with her sobs. “What is this? What are you doing?”

“This is your chance. I want you to choose.”

“Choose what?” he cried.

“Whose life is more important.”

“No, no, no.” He shook his head frantically. “You can’t do that. You wouldn’t do that.”

“You know nothing about me.”

“You love her.”

I cocked my head. “I was obsessed. It’s different. She pissed me off and I found myself free of it. Killing her sounds better than loving her, actually. I mean, I did everything for Alana and all she’s done is deny her feelings. She wanted nothing to do with me after you ran off earlier.”

“You can’t do this!”

“She’s a pain in my ass,” I continued. Pulling a knife from my pocket, I poised it at her throat. “Maybe I’ll just do it anyway.”

“No!” he shouted.

“You’ll die for her?”

His mouth snapped shut and he averted his gaze. When it was clear he wouldn’t answer, I returned to the garage.

“Let’s sweeten the pot.”

It was easier to drag the smaller girl into the room. She fell to the ground and covered her head.

“Oh my god,” Mike gasped. “Is that…”

“The one and only. Hearing a kid scream for their life might haunt me, but my soul has been irreparably damaged anyway. It’s funny how the more you kill, the better it feels.”

“Please, Jayce. Don’t do this. I’ll leave Alana alone. I’ll leave all of you alone.”

“Too late, Mike. Either I kill them both and you live or I kill you and they both live.”

“You can’t make me choose.”

I held the blade to the girl’s throat. Mike became frantic, but he nearly tumbled off of the stool, so he forced himself to stay still. The look that passed over his face told me everything.

“Wow.” I breathed a laugh. “Tell me something. Is it because she’s not yours? When did you find out?”

Tears streamed down Mike’s cheeks. “Not until Hailey died and Jake showed up at my door.”

I whistled. “That’s rough. If she was yours, would your decision be different?”

He turned his head, trying to hide. It didn’t really matter. He was a piece of shit and this experiment told me everything that I needed to know. He’d put himself above everyone else, which made him too dangerous to keep alive.

“Don’t make me watch,” he whispered.

Rolling my eyes, I pulled the hoods off of the two hostages. Mike paled as he looked between them.

“This is Mary,” I said, gesturing to the woman. “And her daughter, Sammy.”

“I-I don’t understand.”

“They’ve been living underneath a bridge down the road from my house. A couple thousand and a month in a hotel while they get back on their feet is a great motivator. Maybe they should go into acting. Don’t you think?”

I turned to Mary, who was looking at Mike with disgust. Really, no sane person would pity him after what they just witnessed.

“You guys can get in the truck,” I said. “I’ll bring you to the hotel.”

Mary’s eyes watered and she hugged me quickly before she took Sammy’s hand. The kid smiled at me, looking more nervous than her mom. Maybe this was a bad thing to put a kid in the middle of, but she’d be fine. Maybe it would teach her a good lesson about being careful who she trusted. Besides, they’d been unhoused for almost two years, according to Mary. She’d seen and been through her fair share of shit that was worse than this.

“I wish I would’ve met them before this,” I drawled as I circled Mike. “I would’ve made sure they were taken care of, but it did present a perfect opportunity in the end.”

“Y-you tricked me.”

“You can’t honestly think I’d hurt my girlfriend or my niece. I’m not you.”

“Please just let me go. Nobody has to know about this.”

“I might’ve let you go if you proved yourself not to be a complete waste of space. Probably not, but I would’ve at least considered it.”

“Fuck you,” he growled.

I stopped behind him and ran my fingers over the rope at the back of his neck. Leaning close to his ear, I let the mask touch his cheek.

“You’re a little bitch, Mike. I should’ve killed you the moment you touched Alana on that porch. Live and learn.”

I kicked the stool out from under his feet. He thrashed and kicked his feet as if that would save him. The sounds of his struggle seeped into my fucking soul- every gurgle, the clack of his teeth together as he fought for air, and the keening that came from his compressed throat.

When he stopped moving, I let out a breath. Coming around to his front, I looked at his bloodshot eyes. After committing the image to memory, I picked up the hoods and did a once-over to make sure there was no evidence of anyone else being here.

I would’ve preferred to draw out Mike’s death, maybe even tortured him, but this one had to be a suicide. It was the safest option. The note he left on his nightstand would inform the police of his fragile state of mind. He’d been a drinker and an abuser, which would line up with what happened the day I took Alicia. The death of his wife and the loss of his daughter, combined with the debts he was drowning in, were just too much for him.

From the interactions I’d had with Alicia, she didn’t seem to feel much of a connection with Mike, so I didn’t even feel bad about that part. She fit right in with our family and I had no doubt she’d be ecstatic to be a part of it. Something about that kid told me she was tough enough to handle anything. Hell, a man in a creepy mask was in her room and she’d been pretty chill about it.

Yeah, she’d be fine. We all would. I just had to figure out this shit with Alana so that we could march straight into our happily ever after.

Chapter 38

Jayce

Well, I’d fucked up. The text I was staring at right now was proof of that.

Alana: I need to talk to you.

Please. Mike tried to hurt me. I think I’m in real danger.

She was turning to Erebus for comfort instead of me. That or she was playing a game. It felt off, that was for sure. I didn’t know what I was supposed to do. I hadn’t made a plan for this.

I stared up at her window. All of the lights were off and she wasn’t on her phone. I thought about letting her sleep and dealing with it tomorrow, but I couldn’t do that. Her distress drew me in, demanded that I make sure she was okay. It was my entire purpose in this life.

Well, if she tried to stab me again, maybe it was karma. I’d been doing a lot of murder-y stuff lately.

With a sigh, I headed toward the building. I wasn’t feeling as confident as I had every time before. I certainly didn’t have that rush of excitement that came from feeding on her fear and pleasure in succession.

Quietly, I opened the front door. It felt dead in here. If I hadn’t seen her car outside, I would’ve thought she wasn’t home. It just felt wrong.

I ran my fingers over the island, smiling when I saw the wrappers. She’d eaten the chocolates. Quite a few of them, actually. That was a good sign, right?

Continuing down the hall, I found her door cracked. She was lying on her stomach with her face turned toward the window. Both of her hands were visible, so I knew she wasn’t holding a weapon. If one was under the pillow, I’d be prepared for it.

Resituating my mask, I kicked off my boots and knelt on the bed. With my knees on either side of her hips, I leaned down and breathed in her scent. It never got old. Just being this close made my cock stiffen. I pressed myself against her ass, which made her stir.

In her soft shorts, it was easy to move them to the side enough to plunge two fingers inside of her. She cried out and fisted the sheets. Looking at me over her shoulder, her eyes went wide. When I cocked my head, she licked her lips.

“Erebus.”

I said nothing as I stroked her tight walls. Moving my other hand underneath her, I cupped her breast. She pushed her ass backward, an easy invitation for me to do more. To take her. Fucking own her. I didn’t want this person to claim her, but she wanted him, so I’d give her that.

“You came,” she said through a moan.

“Mhm.”

“But why?”

“Because you asked.”

“I thought you were done with me.”

Grinding my teeth together, I flipped her onto her back. “If it were that simple, would I have gone through all the trouble of making you fall in love with me?”

“I’m not-”

I shushed her, running my thumb over her lips. Leaning over her, I dropped my voice to a whisper. “Why is your cunt so wet, Alana? Is it for me?”

She nodded, whimpering when I spread her wetness up to her clit. I stripped her of the shorts, then parted her lips so that I could see the tattoo. Nyx. She was Erebus’ lover and that meant she belonged to me, the god of darkness- hers and mine.

Her chest rose and fell heavily as she watched me. I met her eyes and ran my thumb over her clit. Her lips parted, making my mouth water.

“Take the mask off,” she whispered.

I paused, caught off guard. With a shake of my head, I unzipped my pants and stroked my cock, trying to ignore the pleading look in her eyes. Before I could enter her, she bent her knee and put a foot on my chest, applying pressure. I raised a brow, then realized she couldn’t see it anyway. When she pushed harder, I huffed and sat back.

Her arms twined around my neck as she sat in my lap. Her warm pussy moved down the underside of my shaft and I thrust upward, wanting more of her, all of her. She dropped her face to my neck, pushing my hood back enough to reach my skin. My eyes closed when she pressed her lips against me.

Lifting her, I positioned her over my cock. Her tongue grazed the shell of my ear just as she lowered onto me. It was agonizing to wait. I fucking needed her. I always had and always would.

“Ride me, Alana.”

She obeyed, her quickening breaths hitting my ear and making me shiver. I squeezed her ass tightly, guiding her movements- harder, faster, then slow again. I could tell by the cadence of her breathing that she was getting closer.

Grabbing her ponytail, I pulled her head back. She looked into my eyes with parted lips and flushed cheeks. She searched my face as if she could see straight through the mask.

“What do you see?” I asked.

Something crossed her features- uncertainty, anger, pleasure, or all of the above. It was impossible to decipher. Gently, I laid her down and pushed back inside of her.

“Stop,” she said.

“Stop what? If you mean fucking you, the answer is always no.”

She moaned, her fingers digging into my back. I wished I wasn’t wearing the sweatshirt so I could feel her nails on my skin.

“You’re being soft,” she went on.

My hands traveled under her cami, drifting over her smooth skin. “And why shouldn’t I be?”

“Because you’re not him right now.”

I stopped breathing. It was a possibility before I came in here, of course, but if she knew, why hadn’t she said anything until now? I didn’t trust it. This wasn’t how she should be acting. She shouldn’t be letting me fuck her like this, as if everything was normal.

When I started to move back, she sat up and wrapped her arms around me. “Jayce.”

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

All of my plans converged, crashing together in a massive, flaming heap. None of them were good plans, even though I wouldn’t let myself see it at the time. Break and reforge her, make her fall in love with both sides of me, make her run into my arms- they were all flawed in countless ways. And it was infinitely more unnerving that I had no idea which rules we were following right now. This specific scenario wasn’t one I’d considered, at least not like this. When I thought about her finding out prematurely, I imagined her stabbing me in the jugular or screaming and running to the police.

This… What the fuck was happening?

I shook my head, unable to figure it out right now. Instead, I flipped her onto her stomach and thrust inside of her again.

“Jayce.”

I fucked her harder, forcing the breath from her. When she tried to brace herself with her hands, I held onto the back of her neck. A major part of me feared this would be the last time she’d let me touch her like this. Why’d she text Erebus? Why put on the act?

Maybe she was setting me up. I looked around, but there weren’t any visible cameras and no flashing lights outside. I grabbed her phone off the nightstand without slowing. When I unlocked it, there were no apps running.

Again, I wondered what would happen after this. I couldn’t lose her. I wouldn’t. Alana Monroe would never escape me. Even in death, I would find her, and if I had to thrust hooks through both of us to bind us together, I would do it without hesitation.

“Jayce, you’re hurting me,” she whimpered.

Releasing her neck, I grabbed onto her hips, yanking her back with every one of my thrusts. She cried out and dug her fingers into the mattress. I could hear the sheets tear under her grip. With a frustrated growl, I pulled out of her and rolled her over.

“Do you want me?” I demanded.

Tears streamed down her face as she stared up at me. “I don’t know.”

“Then why ask me to come here?”

“I had to know… for sure.”

“You’re playing games.”

She wouldn’t answer and I was tired of waiting. Reaching up, I ripped off the mask and flung it across the room. Her eyes widened, even though she already knew what would be underneath. I wanted to throttle her for all of this bullshit but as always, I couldn’t bring myself to hurt her. Not really.

Taking her by the throat, I moved my hips forward. As soon as I kissed her, she wrapped her legs around my waist. And it was everything.

I fucked her just as hard as before, but this time she didn’t complain. I pulled off my sweatshirt, letting her move her hands underneath my t-shirt. The glide of her fingers across my back anchored me and when her nails dug into my skin, I forced her mouth open. Her tongue met mine, needy and desperate, just like I knew she’d been for me all this time. She just wouldn’t give in to that darkness the way I had. I’d never had a choice. Whether it was a compulsion that drove me to her and pushed me to such lengths, I didn’t care. If one of us had to be a monster, I’d happily claim the title as long as I got Alana in the process.

“I love you,” I said into her mouth. “I love you. I fucking love you. Until my dying breath, with my dying breath, after my dying breath.”

I tasted her tears as they streamed through our lips. Holding onto the back of her neck, I crushed her against me, unwilling to give an inch.

“You love me, Alana. Tell me you love me.”

She made a choked sound as her pussy tightened around me. “Jayce, I… Fuck.”

She cried out and I couldn’t keep myself from finishing with her. I bit her lip until she bled and when it trickled onto my tongue, I pushed it into her mouth. When I sat back on my knees, I pushed my fingers inside of her. She quivered, still in the aftermath of her orgasm. Pulling them free, I spread my cum around her clit, then over her skin, traveling up to her stomach. The sight was enough to make me want to start over.

When I looked at her, there were a few tears still rolling down her cheeks.

“Alana.”

“I don’t want to,” she said, barely above a whisper.

“Don’t want to what?”

“Love you.”

“Well, denial won’t help the situation.”

Her nostrils flared. The anguish in her eyes morphed into hostility. I raised a brow as I watched her get up, hunting for the shorts I’d tossed somewhere in the room earlier. When she couldn’t find them, she marched over to the dresser and grabbed a pair of jeans.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“Going for a walk.”

“You’re not going for a walk. It’s fucking one in the morning.”

“What’s gonna happen, Jayce? Is someone gonna start stalking me?"

“You’re not very street smart, so it’s a valid concern.”

“Screw you.”

“Jesus,” I muttered, getting to my feet.

She watched me warily and I didn’t miss the way her eyes darted down to my half-hard dick. If she didn’t stop looking, she’d find herself spread out on the bed again, a victim to my whims. Those could get pretty dark these days.

She disappeared into the closet and came back out with a sweater. “Go away.”

“You called me here.”

“I wanted to talk. I didn’t know you’d immediately come in and fuck me.”

“Oh, come on. Don’t bullshit me. You’re not stupid. That’s why you called him.”

“You mean, I called you.”

“You know the difference.”

She whirled on me with only one arm in her sweater. “What is the difference, Jayce? Huh? You don’t have some split fucking personality.”

“Maybe I do.” I laughed when her face turned a deeper shade of red with her anger. “Let’s just calm down, yeah?”

“Don’t you dare tell me to calm down.”

I held up my hands in surrender, still smiling. “Alright. That’s my mistake.”

“I’m done with this. You had one last joy ride, now we can part ways.”

“Part ways,” I repeated. My own anger was rising to the surface, making my skin hot. “You ruined me for anyone else and you think you can just walk away?”

“I didn’t do anything. Your obsession is on you.”

Closing the distance between us, I grabbed her jaw in one hand and backed her up against the dresser.

“I’ve loved you for as long as I’ve known you. I’ve kept you safe, fucking killed for you.”

“You…” She drew in a shuddering breath. “You killed people?”

“Threats.” I waved a dismissive hand. “They get eliminated.”

“This isn’t a game!”

“Everything is a game, Alana! Life is a fucking game. There are winners and losers. We can cheat, lie, manipulate the odds. Everybody is keeping score and if you haven’t figured that out then you’re too naïve.”

Her jaw worked as her eyes fell to my chest. “I’m not naïve.”

“I manipulated you, Alana. Over and over again. And it was so fucking easy to make you kneel to me. It’s a game and you’ve lost every fucking round.”

“Yeah, you manipulated me. I think that speaks more to your character.”

“If I can fuck with your mind, what’s stopping anyone else from doing it, huh? If someone else showed up wearing this mask, would you know the difference?”

“Yes.”

“I think you’re fucking weak.”

“Stop it,” she said in a small voice that pissed me off more.

“For years, you were too much of a coward to admit you loved me. Even when he was gone, you wouldn’t do it. You invite me here, then try to run away after you play your hand. For what?” I laughed and squeezed her cheeks harder. “That’s weak.”

She slammed her hands against my chest. It made me smile and I pressed my body closer to hers. Her palm connected with my cheek. Letting out a scream, she shoved me with all of her strength, then turned her head and bit my fingers that still held her face.

“There. Fucking finally. Why didn’t you fight this hard before? Why’d you let me come in here and fuck you again?”

“Because it’s you.” Her eyes welled with tears, making the green shimmer. “But you’re a bad person. You’re not who I thought you were.”

I loosened my grip on her, stroking across her jaw. “You liked me when I was only the monster and when I was the hero. Now, you know I’m both and you’re somehow jumping on a high horse. Somewhere deep down, you knew. I think you knew the whole time.”

“No.”

With a chuckle, I slid both of my hands to her waist. “You trusted me too quickly, Alana. You gave in so easily, before the tattoo had even healed on your cunt.” I kissed a few of the tears on her cheeks. “You gave yourself to the beast inside of me because you were too much of a coward to take what you truly wanted.”

“And what’s that?” she demanded.

“All of me. You want me just as much as I’ve always wanted you.”

“You just want my compliance. My submission.”

“No. I don’t want you to bend to my will. Not until I make you. You weren’t made to be mediocre. I don’t want easy. I don’t want complacency. I want this. Us. Forever.”

I pulled her into a kiss. She gave in for a moment before she turned her head.

“Put the mask on.”

“No.”

“If you’re gonna fuck me, do it with the mask. I can’t look at your goddamn face, Jayce.”

Picking her up, I set her on top of the dresser. She kicked at me when I pulled off her jeans. Without any preamble, I thrust inside of her roughly, making her grip my arms tightly.

“You say that, but you still want to fuck me. You see how insane that is, right?”

“Then I’m insane,” she said before she gasped. “But you’re worse.”

“Yes, I am.” The dresser shook, knocking over a picture and some bottles of perfume. Her nails drew blood on my arms and it only made me fuck her harder. “I’m gonna fuck you like he would and you’re going to look at my face. You’re going to look into my eyes and realize you love every horrifying, monstrous part of me because we belong to each other, now and forever, in life and in death. And if you want to kill me, at least give me one last taste of your corrupt soul.”

“If it’s corrupt, it’s only because you made it that way.”

“I’ll happily spend an eternity in hell for that. Do you know why?” She stared, waiting. “Because it puts you right there beside me. There’s no escape, baby, and it’s time for you to accept that you don’t want one.”

Chapter 39

Alana

Edgar Allen Poe once said, ‘I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity.’

Had I gone mad? It was possible. Maybe I was living in a land of delusions. But which was the delusion- loving Jayce or leaving him? I couldn’t very well do the second one. He’d find me; that much I was sure of. He was dangerous, yes, but in a way that was worse than your run-of-the-mill criminal. Jayce was smart and clever. He was methodical and no matter what situation he was put in, I suspected that he could find a way out.

Things were fine, objectively. He didn’t let me stay at my own place anymore, which was okay, I guess. I wanted to be near him most of the time. Then, I’d overthink it the way I was now. Usually, it happened when I was away from him. There weren’t many instances where that happened except when I was working.

What did I want? I couldn’t fucking figure it out and every time I thought I did, something swayed me. It was scary to think that it could be like this forever- the mistrust, the uncertainty, and the fear that he could actually hurt me. I didn’t really believe he would. He’d been in love with me for twelve years, so why would he do that now?

Obsession, though… It was a terrifying thing. The more I looked into it, the more concerned I became. I watched his movements and body language. I analyzed the way he kissed me and fucked me. Any variation from what I was used to could be a sign that something was wrong. I’d seen You, and that motherfucker had a tendency to kill the women he professed to love.

No, that wasn’t Jayce. Not my Jayce. I loved him and there was no denying it. Thinking about spending my life with him brought a smile to my face. I imagined getting married, going on a honeymoon to Europe, and getting a cat someday.

The man had done things that were beyond questionable. They were downright terrible. Sick, even. He was right, though. I’d accepted him as Erebus in some weird, fucked up way. I loved Jayce to death and I could accept his darkness. He wasn’t dangerous to me and the only people he’d hurt had been a threat to me. It wasn’t moral, but the more I thought about it, I felt sure that we’d get through this.

It had been a week already and things were great at home. We cooked together, watched TV, went on walks, and gardened. We had a lot of sex and, goddamn, the man could fuck. I’d never experienced anything like it. No disrespect to my late fiancé. That part was still weird, but not as bad as I’d thought it would be all this time.

Yeah. We could make it work. We’d have a discussion to make sure there’d be no more future kills and I’d come to terms with the ones in the past. That was the best way to move forward.

The bell rang and students shuffled out of the classroom. With the end of the quarter coming up, they were preparing for finals, so I’d been giving them a lot of study time. Maybe part of it was because my brain was all whacky and I wasn’t confident in my teaching abilities right now.

Grabbing my bag, I did a once-over to make sure the classroom was in order. It was Friday and there was no way I’d stay late. Principle McKay could suck my lady dick if he tried to say something about it.

When I passed Mike’s door, I paused. It looked so different now. His stuff had been cleared out and a sub had been teaching his class. I was still in shock about his death. Suicide, according to authorities, but… Well, I tried not to think about that too much either. The fact was, I felt safer without him, so regardless of how he’d gone out, it was better.

As I approached my car, I pulled out my phone. One thing I’d been thinking about a lot lately was my brother. My conversation with him triggered something in me. We’d been distant from each other for so long and I didn’t want that. Even if we only saw each other on holidays or something, I wanted to have some sort of relationship. Christmas was coming up quickly. Maybe we could spend it together.

From the way he’d spoken to me on the phone, I thought he would feel the same way. There was genuine affection in his voice and it struck a chord in my heart.

It rang for a while, then went to voicemail. This was the third time I’d tried this week. Maybe I was wrong about him wanting to have a relationship. If he was ignoring my calls and texts, he obviously didn’t want to talk.

Chewing on my lip, I backed out of the space. Ben had lived in the same house for five years. I’d only been there once, but I knew exactly where it was. Even though we didn’t talk for a long time, I drove by once in a while to check if his car was still there.

The Mustang was in the driveway, so I assumed he was home. Before I’d even stepped out of my car, my phone rang. With a frown, I answered it.

“Jayce, what’s up?”

“Where are you?”

“I just left work. Why?”

He was silent for a long moment. I got out of the car and headed up to the house.

“I need you to come home,” he said finally.

“I’m just checking on something really quick. Don’t get weird on me.”

“Come on, baby.” His voice had turned husky and seductive. It made me bite my lip, but it could wait a few extra minutes.

“Don’t worry. I’ll be home soon.”

I ended the call and stopped on the porch. With a deep breath, I knocked. There was nothing to indicate that someone was going to open it- no shuffling or talking. I knocked again, then tried to peer in the front window. I could only see through the tiny gap between the drapes. It was dark, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t home.

Looking around, I tried to find something that might have a spare key in it. I didn’t see any fake rocks or anything. After checking under the rug, I sighed. If he wasn’t going to answer my calls or the door, there wasn’t much I could do about it aside from break in. My first thought was that Jayce could do it for me since he was all about being sneaky, but it wasn’t like he’d needed to pick the lock at my place. He had a code.

There was nothing else to do right now, so I headed back to my SUV. I shot Jayce a text to tell him I was on my way and glanced at the Mustang again. As I was pulling away from the curb, I had a random thought. I stopped in front of the mailbox and leaned over to open it. Immediately, a few envelopes fell out. I opened the door to grab them, clamping my lip between my teeth.

Why was his mailbox this full? Unless he regularly received an ungodly amount of junk mail, this had been building up. Worry gnawed at my gut. My brother was into some shady shit. I knew that, but I didn’t think it was all that dangerous. Then again, I wouldn’t know, would I? I didn’t check in or ask about his business.

Something could have happened to him. I thought about going to the police but decided I’d check again tomorrow. If he wasn’t here, I’d file a report. It could be problematic to involve the police if he ended up being okay. He’d be pissed if I put his business at risk by bringing in cops. This was my brother, though. Close or not, we’d once relied on each other in order to stay safe. I cared about his wellbeing and I knew that if the roles were reversed, he’d use all of his shady resources to find me.

*****

“This is Ben and Bean. If you’re a client, give me your name- just your name- and hang up. I’ll get back to you. If we slept together and I said I’d call you, it was a lie. Trust me, you dodged a bullet. If it’s anyone else, I don’t want to talk to you.”

I hated Ben’s voicemail. It got worse every time I heard it. I was so worried that I hadn’t eaten dinner last night and didn’t have an appetite today. Alongside worry was fear and possibly the need for a good cry. He was my only family aside from my parents, who didn’t count as far as I was concerned.

Guilt began to trickle in as I thought about the missed moments, the Christmases we might have experienced together, and the time we should’ve spent healing after our parents were arrested. Instead, I moved in with Jake’s parents. Ben was two years older than me and had a shared apartment near his university at the time, but I should’ve thought more about how he felt. I’d been selfish, drowning myself in my boyfriend to make myself feel better. I got through it, but what did Ben go through? That was something I’d never asked and currently, it was one of my greatest regrets.

Arms came around me from behind, looping over my shoulders. Jayce pressed a kiss beneath my ear, then inhaled deeply.

“You’ve been nursing that tea for an hour,” he noted.

I looked at the mug. Last time I checked, it was steaming. I confirmed that it was cold before I pushed it away.

“What’s going on?” he asked, sitting in the stool beside me. “Are you still worried about Ben?”

“Yeah. He isn’t answering the phone. I need to go back over there.”

“If he doesn’t want to be bothered, he won’t answer. You know how he is. He keeps himself busy.”

“No, I don’t really know. Not anymore. Maybe he just doesn’t want to talk to me.”

Jayce rubbed my back soothingly. “Will it make you feel better if we go knock on his door again?”

“If he answers, yeah. If not, I’m gonna file a missing persons report.”

His hand stopped moving. I glanced over at him, but his face didn’t betray that anything was wrong. He just looked deep in thought. I tapped his nose with my index finger and he smiled.

“You should stop worrying so much, baby. I’m sure Ben is fine.”

I wanted to argue, but I didn’t really know what to say. Jayce’s phone buzzed and he set it on the counter as he checked his texts. When he chuckled, I looked at the screen.

“Alicia?” I confirmed.

He nodded. “She’s hounding me about having a sleepover here. Apparently, she wants to do both of our nails.”

I snorted a laugh. “You’ll look so pretty in pink.”

“Damn right I will. I’ll wear a pink suit to our wedding.”

“You’ll do no such thing, Jayce Weste. I’ll leave you at that altar.”

“First of all, we’re not getting married in a church. I say… a vineyard.”

“Speaking of wine,” I drawled. “Do you have any more of those special bottles?”

“Yeah, I have two in the basement. I’m keeping one, though, either to see how it ages or as a monument to what it represents.”

“And what is that?”

There was a small smile on his lips as he stroked the back of my hand. “Maybe, in a sense, it’s what brought us to this moment.”

“Wine brought us together?” I laughed.

“Yeah. It’s some weird fate shit. Don’t ask me how it works.”

He got to his feet and I gave him a quizzical look. “Are you going somewhere?”

“Yeah, I’m gonna go to Ben’s place. I know some of his friends too, so I’ll check in with them.”

“I want to come.”

He shook his head. “I don’t want you involved at all. Some of the things he deals in… I just think it’s better if there’s no way for you to be implicated if he ever fucks up. It’s best if you don’t show up at his house.”

Maybe he was right. I didn’t know what went on there and I couldn’t be around his illegal dealings. Jayce would find him, hopefully. If not, I would be filing that police report, but that was all I’d do.

Still, there was this churning in my gut that made me think something was off. Really off.

Jayce leaned down to kiss me, then headed out the door. I sat there for a while, tapping my fingers on the counter. I was tempted to call Ben again, but it was pointless right now.

There was one thing I needed. That damn wine. It was in the basement, though, and I fucking hated those. How important was it? My nerves said it was of the utmost importance.

With a deep breath, I got up and headed for the basement door. It was the first one in the hallway and I’d opened it before, but only to check out the wooden stairs and further convince myself there was nothing good in a basement. I was an adult and this wasn’t a horror film. I’d been down there before, so I knew it was nice, albeit a little serial killer-esque.

With my hand on the knob, I counted to ten. Feeling far from ready, I twisted it while I sent up a prayer that there were no demons waiting for me in the abyss.

Chapter 40

Jayce

What was the best course of action here? Alana wasn’t supposed to reach out to Ben. Not for a while, at least. Everything was riding on that, but I’d been wrong. She was going against her norm and I should’ve considered it was a possibility after everything that had happened.

I could text her from his phone. That could also stir up more suspicion. If I said the wrong thing or sounded off to her, she’d be more inclined to go to the police. I wasn’t terribly worried about the idea since I’d covered my tracks well, but it could still be an issue. There was one thing remaining that could screw everything up. His body.

Ben wasn’t fully decomposed yet. It’d been a few weeks and he’d still need another five, give or take. Unless they truly saw me as a person of interest, I wouldn’t need to worry about my basement getting searched, but it was still an issue. Somehow, I needed to get rid of him, which was a damn shame. It was a waste of good fertilizer, but avoiding prison was more important.

I glanced down at my phone when it buzzed.

Alicia: Grandma said I could come when break starts.

Jesus. She was relentless.

Alicia was adjusting remarkably well, which I wasn’t too surprised about. There was still a lot to do before my parents could actually adopt her, but they’d get there. She was part of the family now and that was the important thing.

Jayce: When does Winter break start?

Alicia: Wednesday. We’re out early.

Jayce: K. I’ll be at a job site late. I’ll get you after. Cool?

She sent a crazy amount of emojis that I assumed meant she was happy about it. I was excited too. There was so much lost time to make up for. It might help Alana think about something else if Alicia came over. Even though there was still a bit of trepidation because of the situation itself, they really liked each other. I knew their relationship would grow and everything would fall into place.

First, I had to fix this Ben situation. Since Alicia was coming over on Wednesday, I really needed to get the body out of my house. Kids were curious creatures and she might go wandering when I wasn’t looking. Knowing her, she’d love to explore the basement.

I grabbed Ben’s phone from his desk where I’d placed it after his death. After letting it charge enough, I turned it on. Texts started coming in quickly, most likely clients that he’d ghosted. Navigating to Alana’s messages, I read through them.

Lana: Hey, I tried calling you, but you’re probably busy. I just wanted to check in. How are you?

Hey. It’s been a couple days. Hope you’re okay.

Ben, I’m kinda worried. I know we don’t talk anymore, but I want to fix that. That’s why I’ve been trying to call.

Remember my 11th birthday? Mom threw a party together the same day because she forgot. Nobody came and she got drunk to deal with the guilt of being a shit parent. You stole money from dad’s wallet and took me ice skating. That’s still my favorite birthday. It meant everything. Anyway, I just want to talk to you. Please, Ben. I love you.

“Damnit, baby,” I muttered. Why did she have to get sentimental now, of all times?

I couldn’t blame her. This one was on me. Killing Ben had been impulsive because I thought he was going to fuck everything up. He knew too much about what I’d done and if he felt like it, he could’ve told her about Jake, the stalking, the tracker on her car. He was a liability, one that I thought she’d never miss.

Hindsight and all that.

Ben’s phone went off and my brow furrowed when I saw a new text from Alana.

Lana: It’s my fault. I know that. I wish we could have a relationship. Ben, I’m sorry for shutting you out after they went to prison. I’m sorry for putting Jake above you. I’m sorry for everything. I love you.

She was giving up. That was good, but there was still a chance she’d go to the police.

Fuck me. I scrolled through his texts to get a feel for his voice, then went back to the messages.

Ben: Lana… Tbh, idk what you expect. You’re my sister and I’ll always love you, but it’s too late. You know what they say about water and bridges. I want the best for you. I just think things should stay the way they’ve been all these years. Maybe that’ll change later but right now, that’s where I’m at. Be happy, kid.

I read over it a dozen times before I sent it. It showed as read immediately, but she didn’t respond. After ten minutes, I disconnected the phone from the charger and put it back on the desk. Whenever someone did look into his disappearance, everything would look like he’d just walked away. Maybe the text to Alana would make them think he wanted to start over or something.

It didn’t matter. I left no trace of my involvement. Anything that mentioned me in his records was gone. All they’d have was a cold trail and, in the end, they probably wouldn’t put much effort into it. Benjamin Monroe was now a ghost, literally and in the eyes of the world. Gone and mostly forgotten.

Except for his body, of course. I needed to get rid of that while Alana was at work this week. Something had solidified in my mind since I won Alana and it became even more clear today.

She could never find out about Ben or Jake. She knew I’d killed and if she asked, I’d be honest about my victims. Not those two. It could break her and, worse, it could drive her away from me. That was something I’d sworn would never happen.

*****

My rotorcraft was finally complete and it was magnificent. Hector had pulled through just before the deadline. It was enough to make me wrap him in a bear hug, which might have terrified him, but I was in a good mood today.

I was going to tell Alana that Alicia was coming, but the kid wanted to surprise her. She loved dropping surprises. Who was I to take that away from her? She’d even made her a Christmas ornament, which was freaking adorable. I loved the hell out of this kid.

“Go put your stuff in the spare room,” I instructed, pointing to the one at the beginning of the hall.

She took off and I followed. Going past her room, I looked at my closed door. Alana hadn’t been in the living room or kitchen when we walked in, so she must be there. It was only seven, but maybe she’d needed a nap after work. She hadn’t texted me back when I told her I was leaving the job site.

Inching the door open, I peered inside. She was lying on her stomach in bed and I couldn’t help but smile. Seeing her there was something I’d dreamed of for what felt like an eternity. We’d earned this beautiful life.

I closed the door behind me and crawled over her. Moving her hair away from her neck, I kissed the back of it.

“Baby,” I murmured.

She made a little sound and covered her face with her arm. I pried it away, then started kissing her cheek, down to her jaw.

“Someone’s here to see you,” I said.

“No.”

I frowned. She was always grumpy when she woke up, but this felt different. Her voice was monotone and she hadn’t even opened her eyes. She’d been tired all week and acted a little distant, which I’d assumed was because of work. In the days leading up to Winter break, she always reached a burn out point.

“Alana, what’s wrong? Talk to me, baby.”

She shook her head, burying her face in the pillow. Her shoulders shuddered and my heart beat faster when I realized that she was crying.

“Hey,” I said softly. When she didn’t respond, I moved onto the floor beside the bed and turned her to face me. Her eyes opened, then she averted her gaze. “What’s going on?”

A tear slid down her cheek. “He’s gone.”

“Who?”

“He’s gone,” she repeated, her face contorting as if she was in pain. “I just wanted to see him again, but he’s gone.”

I didn’t know who she was talking about. Her brother or Jake, maybe. Something was severely wrong, but I wasn’t sure that I could get her to open up right now. A knock on the door made me swear.

“Alana, please get up. I’ll make you some tea, okay?”

She shook her head. “Leave me alone. I don’t want to see anyone.”

I stared at her for another moment before I sighed. Leaning forward, I kissed her lips, then her nose.

“Sleep. We’ll figure this out tomorrow. I love you.”

She met my eyes and gave me a curt nod. Accepting that was all I’d get right now, I stood and headed for the door. Alicia was bouncing on her toes when I opened it, but I jerked my chin toward the living room. With a pout, she followed me.

“Alana doesn’t feel good right now,” I said. “You can give her the ornament tomorrow.”

“Is she sick?” Her eyes were wide with worry.

I smiled and brushed her shoulder. “Maybe. I’m sure she’ll be fine tomorrow. Are you hungry?”

“Starving,” she replied dramatically.

“Broccoli is your favorite, right? Or kale salad.”

Her nose wrinkled. “That’s disgusting.”

“You’re right. That’s why I ordered pizza. Extra anchovies.”

“Ugh. I wanna go home.”

With a laugh, I grabbed the TV remote and dropped onto the couch. “You’re a dramatic little devil. I wonder where you got that from.”

“You.”

I feigned shock, putting a hand over my chest. “I am and always have been an angel.”

“Bullshit.”

“Alicia,” I scolded, but I couldn’t completely hide my amusement. “Don’t you know swearing gives you a one-way ticket to hell?”

“Grandmas and grandpa said they’re just words and to call any word ‘bad’ is a sign of low intelligence and conform… confirmit…”

“Conformity to society,” I filled in. It was exactly what they’d said to us growing up.

“Yeah, that. I just can’t say those words at school or with my friends.”

“Fine, but don’t start dropping F-bombs all willy nilly. It quickly becomes habitual.”

Navigating to the Disney app, I handed her the remote. I’d just added the subscription this week for her and I already knew she was going to make me watch something I would hate. If it was Frozen, I swear to god…

Chapter 41

Alana

He was gone. What had he done with him? Why… Why would he do that?

I should have left. After going into that basement, there was no reason to stay. Jayce had killed. I knew that, sure, but then I saw him… He was in some freaky coffin and he’d been covered in plant material. I wanted to ask, but I also didn’t want to know.

Why didn’t I leave? Why was I still here?

It was because I loved him, of course. Love, which was supposed to be a beautiful emotion, was keeping me shackled here. And I couldn’t bring myself to want to leave. It was just that I knew it was the logical thing to do.

Jayce killed my brother and I had no idea why. I was angry and hurt and completely shattered. Terror should’ve been in that list too, but I wasn’t afraid of him.

That was insane. Completely batshit crazy. Was this some sort of symptom of manipulation? I didn’t know if what he’d done could lead to this ridiculous sense of loyalty I had for him. I wanted to make excuses for him.

There had to be a reason, right? He said that everyone he killed was a threat. He… was protecting me.

Yes. That had to be it. Somehow, Ben was a threat. But was he a threat to me physically or to what I had with Jayce? After everything he’d done, I imagined he’d do anything to keep me. I wanted to see that as sweet.

God, I was fucked in the head. I needed to sort it all out, but my mind kept going round in circles and it always landed on what I felt for Jayce. It was selfish to love him and accept all of this just so that we could be together. After everything I’d been through in life, maybe I deserved to be selfish.

Who decided what was and wasn’t acceptable? He killed some people, but I trusted him deep down.

One thing I did need was the truth. It was possible he’d tell me if I just asked. What if he didn’t?

Shit, shit, shit.

My head hurt. It ached and pounded. The more I thought, the worse it became.

There was music somewhere out there. Was I imagining that? Disney. I couldn’t pinpoint the movie, but it was comforting.

It must’ve been my imagination. My mind was fracturing, so it was trying to protect itself from the bad things. Sometimes, when I was little, it did the same thing. I’d sing to myself and imagine that someone was singing with me. My dad called me a basket case when I told him, so I stopped singing altogether.

Ben was the only real thing that held me together back then until I met Jake. Or Jayce. I didn’t know which one had actually brought me more comfort. Probably the latter. At this point, why should I even lie about it? If they would’ve asked me to be with both of them, I would’ve said yes in an instant.

But Jayce… god, I loved him. I should’ve accepted that sooner, consequences be damned.

Ben always liked him. Ben… Who else?

Lying on my side, I rocked forward and backward as I asked that question repeatedly. I needed to know. It mattered somehow, but I didn’t know why.

“I love you,” I whispered, realizing I hadn’t said it back earlier. “I love you, I love you. Who? Who else? Who…”

My words became jumbled along with my thoughts. I hadn’t slept more than an hour each night since I went into that basement on Saturday. It certainly wasn’t helping me keep my shit together.

Who else? Who else? Who else? Who else?

With a growl, I squeezed my eyes shut. I wanted to watch a Disney movie too, but I still didn’t know if it was real and I couldn’t bring myself to go out there. He’d see. All these messed up things in my head would freak him out and he’d make me talk about it. I wasn’t ready yet.

I just needed to sleep. If I rested, I’d be able to sort through everything.

Ben’s green eyes stared back at me behind my lids and I whimpered. Where’d he go? I just wanted to see him again. Why didn’t he let me see him one more time?

What did he do with Ben?

Chapter 42

Jayce

My eyes opened and I sucked in a startled breath when I saw Alana hovering above me. She was straddling my lap with her hands on my chest, just staring down at me. It was a little unnerving, but I slid my hands up her bare thighs with a smile.

“What time is it?” I asked.

She shrugged. “Still dark.”

I flattened my palms against her shoulder blades and brought her lower so that I could kiss her. She moaned against my lips and shifted in my lap.

“Can we do something?” she murmured.

“Anything you want.”

She swung her leg over me and stood. I watched her, putting an arm behind my head. Slowly, she pulled her shirt over her head. At the sight of her breasts, I put a hand over my growing cock through my briefs, stroking it with my fingers. Once the shorts came off, I was ready to throw her back onto the bed.

Moving at an agonizing pace, she put her knees on the mattress and pressed a kiss to my thigh. She maneuvered my shorts down and licked her lips as she stared at my cock. Her mouth lowered and her tongue trailed over the tip. Immediately, I tried to push my fingers through her hair, but she shook her head.

“No touching me,” she said.

I raised a brow. “You want control, baby?” When she nodded, I fought the urge to groan. “Fine. I’ve taken yours, so you can have mine this time.”

She flashed me a beautiful smile before she took me into her mouth. I kept my hands at my sides but couldn’t resist arching my hips. When she circled her tongue around me, I had to grip the sheets to keep from touching her. The warmth traveled down my shaft, all the way to the base and back up. It was turmoil and ecstasy.

“Alana,” I breathed.

Her green eyes met mine as her lips moved past my head. She crawled up my body and slid herself along my shaft, driving me mad. With her hands on my chest, she positioned my cock just at her entrance but stopped there. When she looked at my rising hands, I lowered them back to the mattress.

“You have that look on your face,” I noted.

“What look?”

“When you want something. What is it, baby? You know I’ll give you anything.”

She rolled her teeth over her bottom lip. I was dying to kiss her, but I wasn’t allowed to use my hands. I was very close to breaking those rules.

“Tell me who you’ve killed.”

My eyes widened. She lowered herself so that I was just inside of her and I was torn between becoming lost in her body and processing what she’d just said. When she took all of me, she stayed there.

Oh, it was going to be one of those games.

“Alana,” I warned. “Don’t fuck with me.”

“Tell me.”

“Really? You want this right fucking now?” She nodded. “You didn’t have to play some edging game to get this out of me, you know.”

She rose and dropped down once. My cock throbbed, desperate for her to move more.

“Okay…” I struggled to think while I was inside of her. “Greg.”

Her head cocked. “Greg? Art history guy?” I nodded. “You killed his friend too.”

I smiled a little. “Casualty of war.”

The blank expression on her face made me sit up. She held me back with one hand and even though I could easily break her hold, I let her process it the way she needed to.

“Who else?” she asked.

“There was a guy who tried to follow you home when you worked nights at that call center. And Ted, the one who tried to pick you up at the bar. If I didn’t do anything, he would’ve made a case for assault against Jake.”

I paused when I said his name. She moved on me again, pushing him out of my mind. The way she rolled her hips made my lips part.

“Preston,” I choked out just before I grabbed her thighs.

She stopped moving entirely, so I flipped her onto her back and thrust inside of her. The sound that left her lips made me lean down to kiss her.

“Why Preston?” she asked when I pulled back.

“He made you cry.”

Her nostrils flared and her chin shook. “He was just a dick.”

“That was enough.”

“Who else?”

“That’s it.”

She stared at me, analyzing everything as I maintained a careful expression. I pushed her knees to her chest, reaching deeper and drawing a cry from her.

It didn’t matter that she was conflicted or even angry. We’d get through it. Regardless of what had or would happen, I’d show her time and again that what we had was right. I’d fight for it until my dying breath, even if I had to kill everyone in this city.

“I’m not the good guy,” I told her, punctuating my statement with a hard thrust. Moving slower on the way out, I stared down at her pussy, the way it stretched around me and coated my cock in her slick arousal. “That means I’ll do things you don’t always like, but every one of them is to make sure that we both stay where we belong. Together.”

“Jayce,” she gasped.

“My name is the only one you’ll ever say like that, baby. Anyone who dared to look at you wrong would face the worst side of me. You already know that, so don’t try to make a case for any of those bastards who already found out the hard way.”

Her eyes moved up to the ceiling and I watched a tear slip free. Pulling out of her, I crawled backward, then dropped to my elbows. I yanked her to my face, immediately tasting her dripping cunt. It was just as intoxicating as the first time in her room.

“Oh, god,” she moaned. “I’m gonna come.”

Gripping the backs of her thighs, I worked her clit faster with my tongue. Her legs shook as she cried out. I tasted her one more time before I sat up. I pulled her with me, settling her in my lap again. Holding onto her ass, I guided her to my cock. She started riding me, her quick pace bringing me close already.

I buried my face in her neck, breathing her in while she made me come undone. Every time I had her, I felt it in my entire body. It was everything I’d thought about for so many years. She was everything.

Pushing my fingers through her hair, I tipped her head back and met her eyes. “You’re mine, Alana. Tell me.”

“I…”

Anger rolled through me at her hesitation. I flipped her onto her back and gripped her hip tightly.

“There is no you without me, just like there’s never been anything in this life for me if you aren’t there. Tell me.”

“I’m yours,” she said, her eyes bright and clear. “But…”

“What is it?”

She averted her gaze, not responding to my question. My head cocked as I tried to read her. She was still off. I wondered if she was sick. Maybe the past month had worn her down more than I thought. It was fixable.

“Let’s go on a vacation,” I suggested. “Me and you can get away.”

A small smile appeared on her face. “I haven’t gone anywhere in years.”

“I know. Where do you wanna go?’

“Anywhere?”

“Anywhere, baby.” I pressed my lips to her collarbone, trailing my hands up her abdomen. “Everywhere. We can go to Greece. So much history there.”

“Like Erebus,” she breathed, arching into me.

“And Nyx.” Pushing her knee upward, I kissed the back of her thigh, then used my tongue on her clit. “We’re meant to be among the gods, my love.”

“Okay. Yes. Yes, lets… Fuck, Jayce.”

I smiled and moved away from her clit. “You’re so needy, baby.”

“Just for you.”

That was enough to kill a man. I traced around her nipple with my tongue, keeping a hand on her collarbone so she couldn’t squirm much. My cock pressed against her entrance and I made small movements, working myself inside at an agonizing pace.

“I want to fill you with my cum. Every inch of your pussy is going to be drenched by me and you’re going to keep every drop until I decide you’re done.”

Grabbing my cock, I kept the head inside while I stroked my shaft. She was already beginning to drip my cum from earlier and I needed her to have more before I fucked her. She tried to move her hips and I cocked my head at her.

“Make yourself cum,” I demanded.

She pouted but reached between her legs. I watched her use two fingers to circle her clit, drawing out a beautiful, breathy moan. I pulled out of her, then pushed in just the same amount as before. Continuing that motion, I found myself panting from the intensity with so much stimulation at the tip of my cock. Combined with the fast strokes of my hand, I had to grip her thigh to ground myself.

My cock swelled, but I didn’t stop moving. As I came in her, I felt her pussy clench around me. Thrusting into her, I forced my cum deep inside of her, coating her walls while they contracted.

I grabbed the front of her calves and pushed her knees to her chest, setting a hard and fast rhythm. Right now, I wasn’t concerned with anything but pumping her full of everything I had to give her. I channeled all the years of desire and even when I’d finished again and she begged me to stop, I kept going.

“Give me one more,” I demanded.

“I can’t.”

“There’s always more, baby. Come on.”

Slowing down, I focused on making long, purposeful thrusts. I’d never fucked this long before and I was completely positive that she hadn’t either. Maybe it was improbable, but I was going to give her one more, so she could do the same.

“Nightstand,” I said, jerking my chin.

She leaned to the right and rummaged around in the drawer. Her brow furrowed when she found what I wanted. I took it from her and settled it against her clit before I turned it all the way up. The powerful vibration was extremely overstimulating and it made her try to close her legs.

“Jayce,” she cried.

“I’m gonna force it out of you if I have to, even if it hurts, baby.”

Her back arched and the intensity of the vibrator directly on her clit made her entire body shake. Seeing her in that state, torn between the pain of it and the orgasm that was going to come, regardless of how she felt about it, was utterly beautiful. It brought more feeling into my cock and I sped up, desperate for that final release.

Finally, her pussy pulsed around me. I let out a long groan and fucked her harder.

“That’s it, baby. Fuck. You’re gonna take everything I have and you’re gonna thank me, aren’t you?”

She nodded jerkily through her orgasm. With a groan, I buried myself as deep as I could and dropped to my elbows as I began to soften inside of her. After kissing her forehead, I pulled back. There was so much cum inside of her that it immediately began to spill out. She was a disaster and it was everything I could ever dream of.

“We’re never doing that again,” she panted.

I snorted. “We’ll do that whenever I want. If I want to breed you, I’ll fucking breed you, Alana.”

Her eyes widened. “Don’t do that.”

Rolling my eyes, I pulled her into a sitting position. “Relax. Not for real.”

“Oh, thank god.”

“One more thing, though.”

I grabbed my phone from the nightstand and pushed her legs further apart. It was clear she wanted to argue, but she was smart enough to know she wouldn’t get her way. I snapped a few pictures of the state of her pussy and put them in a secret folder. They might be my most prized possession for a while.

“Jayce,” she said. The tone of her voice made me look up at her. She was holding a hand to her chest and there was something akin to sadness in her eyes.

“What is it?”

“It’s a bad time, but… I can’t sleep if I don’t ask. If I do, will you tell me the truth?”

“I’ll never lie to you.”

With a nod, she got up and pulled on a pair of shorts. Even though something was going on, I felt a sense of satisfaction knowing that she’d still be dripping while we did whatever this was.

I got dressed and took her hand. She led me down the hall slowly, as if she was nervous. When she stopped in front of the basement door, my stomach lurched.

“Alana, what…”

She swung it inward and stared down the dark stairs. I’d never been afraid of basements but now, there was a horrible sense of foreboding looming over us. She’d always been afraid that there were ghosts or demons in places like this. The only ones that existed down there were my own and they were arguably more frightening than some horror flick monsters.

Chapter 43

Alana

It was weird timing; I knew that. When I woke him up, I’d intended to ask him about it because I couldn’t force myself to sleep. As usual, though, I got lost in him. All I’d wanted to do after we finished having sex was lie on his chest, but this had to be done. It was the last thing standing in our way, the final bridge that needed to be burned. If there were no bridges, nothing bad could ever reach us again, right?

After flipping on the light, I stared into the abyss. It wasn’t really as bad as I’d thought it would be. The stairs weren’t rickety; they were sturdy wood with a nice, shiny finish. I’d been down here before, back when I didn’t know it was Jayce’s house, so maybe that made it less disturbing when I’d ventured down the other day.

With a deep breath, I took the first step. He grabbed my hand, pulling me to a stop.

“Hey, let’s go back to bed. Whatever this is, we can do it tomorrow.”

“No, I need to do it now.”

Moving to the step below me, he cupped my face. “What’s going on?”

It was hard to look at him right now. For some reason, it felt like I’d done something wrong. Going down here might have been an invasion of privacy. I hadn’t thought he would be mad, but that was before I knew that he had two dead bodies in creepy, futuristic vessels.

“I’ll explain in a minute,” I said.

I could tell that he was nervous, but he nodded. He’d gotten rid of the bodies somehow, which made me wonder if he’d tell the truth. If he tried to gaslight me, it might tip things in the opposite direction.

He took my hand and descended the stairs with me. I immediately veered toward the fake wall, which made him tense. When I glanced at him, it looked like he was in pain. I took a breath and pushed through into the room.

Like I’d seen yesterday while he was gone, there were only two empty vessels. They were clean, as if nothing horrible had ever happened. As if they hadn’t held decomposing bodies or spoke of the extreme lengths Jayce was willing to go to for me. Ever since I came here the first time, there’d been a war in my head. I loved him for it, but I also hated him for it.

“What are these?” I whispered.

He tugged me with him, then leaned against the wall. I let him pull me against his chest. It actually helped not to look at him right now. Maybe he felt the same way.

Did he feel shame when he thought about what he’d done? Was he cold and unfeeling when it came to anyone but me?

I knew he loved his family, and the way he’d become attached to Alicia was beautiful, even though I wasn’t completely comfortable with that whole situation yet. He cared about things, but where did that end?

“They’re for compost,” he replied in a monotone.

“What kind?”

With a sigh, he tightened his arms around me. “Alana…”

“I saw them.” My ear was pressed against his chest and I could hear his heart speed up. The fact that he was afraid meant he felt something, at least. “When you went to check on Ben, I came down here for wine. And… I saw him.”

My eyes burned at the memory. He stroked my back as tears rolled down my cheeks. Was it wrong that I was taking comfort from the person who had caused my pain?

“Why?” I asked.

“They weren’t good for you.”

“How do you get to decide that?”

He pushed me back and gripped my shoulders. His expression was devoid of emotion except for the intensity in his blue eyes.

“Because nobody cares about you the way I do. Nobody. Every instinct inside of me forces me to protect you, so if someone is a threat, I… Alana, I have to keep you safe.”

“I understand Preston,” I admitted. “To a degree. He was just an asshole but if I think about it enough, I can see why you’d want to do that.”

He looked slightly relieved. When I looked over at the vessels, I began to tremble. His hands moved to the sides of my neck, gripping me tightly.

“Alana, baby. Your brother was mixed up in a lot of shit. He knew things about me that made him dangerous.”

“What’d he know?” When it was clear he didn’t want to tell me, I pulled away from him. “What’d he know, Jayce?”

“It doesn’t matter,” he replied dismissively.

“It matters. You want to get past this? You want to enjoy the spoils of all the fucked up shit you did? Everything has to be on the table. Every truth.”

“And what happens if you don’t like the truth?”

I shrugged. “Maybe I’ll call the cops.”

The smile that twisted his lips was menacing. It didn’t necessarily make me afraid, but it made me very aware of who he was; of what he’d done and was likely to do again if he felt the need.

“You’d turn me in, baby?”

“Maybe,” I mumbled. “Do you deserve it?”

“Oh, I most definitely do. But that’s only if you want to cling to some bullshit rules of morality that society enacted. Am I going to kill someone who doesn’t deserve it? No. What’s wrong with protecting the person you love, though?”

“You said all threats need to be eliminated,” I reminded him. “What if you’re a threat to me?”

He laughed. “I’d never hurt you.”

“You have hurt me! I could get past the physical things, the stalking, all of it, but you took things from me. You took my brother.”

“All I did was make you face what you really want. When’s the last time you thought about Jake, Alana?”

“Jake? I don’t… Over the weekend, I guess.”

He sucked in a slow breath. His jaw ticked a few times, then he shook his head.

“Do you still see him when you look at me?”

My lips parted, but I didn’t know what to say. Honestly, I wasn’t sure. If I thought about it, the last time I remembered that happening was when he’d kissed me in my classroom. Slowly, that memory, the association with his brother, had been crumbling.

“That’s what I thought,” he said when I remained silent. “I told you I was your savior.”

“And my undoing.”

“They go hand-in-hand. Are you strong enough to become what I’ve made you or are you gonna pull this stupid shit?”

“I don’t know. I should be mad at you, but…”

“You’re gonna have to make a decision here.” He held his phone out to me. “Call them if you need to. You know what, I have a better idea.”

He pushed off the wall and strode toward a cabinet in the corner. I watched him warily, wrapping my arms around myself. When he turned around, I stepped back.

“If you want to be free of me, you’ll have to kill me.”

I stared in horror at the gun in his hand. Shaking my head, I took another step away from him. He strode forward and latched onto my throat, then thrust me against the wall. I screamed instinctively but was silenced by his lips on mine. He pushed the weapon into my hand, curling my fingers around it before he stepped back. When he threw his arms wide, making himself a willing target, I swallowed hard.

“No.” I shook my head and tried to pass the gun back. “No, I’m not going to hurt you. The point was to understand. I get it. We can move on now.”

“I killed Jake.”

My back hit the wall as my ears began to ring. “No, no, no.”

I should’ve known. As soon as I learned who Jayce really was, I should’ve put it together. Maybe I hadn’t wanted to. He’d freed me from the guilt and fear of being with Jake’s twin brother, but knowing how it had happened…

“And Mike,” he continued. “He wasn’t only a danger to you. Alicia should be with her family and, well, he tried to use you. He deserved to die.”

I couldn’t really argue with that one. It didn’t even surprise me.

“And Jake…”

Jayce shrugged. “Jake was a threat, Alana. He was hurting you.”

“No, he was in your way,” I said, strength coming into my voice again. “You were dying for a way to get rid of him.”

“If that was the case, I would’ve done it without waiting for a reason. I gave him the chance to be honest with you and he failed. He didn’t deserve you.”

“Why does our obsession mean he didn’t get to live? You’re selfish.”

“And so what if I’m selfish?” he shouted. “That’s never going to change. I will always put you above everything.”

“I know,” I whispered. “That’s why you’re a threat.”

“Alana…”

Raising the gun, I tried to ignore the way it shook in my hand. He glanced at it only briefly before he met my eyes again.

“You want to kill me?” he asked, stepping forward.

I moved my finger to the trigger and raised my chin. He smiled and continued until it was pressed against his chest.

“If I’m going to die, it’ll be at your hands, baby. Let’s do it. Do you think you can?” When I didn’t respond, his head cocked. “I know you’re strong enough. I hurt you, remember? I’ve stalked you since freshman year. I broke into your house all the time, scared you, drugged you, bound you, raped you if we want to be technical. Why haven’t you done it already? Come on, Alana. Come on!”

I screamed, but my finger wouldn’t move. Suddenly, his eyes moved over my shoulder and widened. When I whirled around, he grabbed onto my biceps from behind, but I’d already pulled the trigger. It just clicked.

“Oh my god,” I gasped. “Oh my god. Oh my god.”

“Alana, give me the gun.”

I shook my head. He came around to my front and tried to take it, but I held it to my chest.

“I could have hurt her,” I cried.

“No. It’s not loaded, but you need to give me the gun now. Come on, baby. Everything’s going to be fine.”

That was a lie. Everything was a mess. I shot at a child, at Alicia. I didn’t know she was here. Did he tell me? I didn’t think he had, but then I thought about the Disney songs I’d heard coming from the living room earlier. Why hadn’t I thought of that?

Putting a hand to my forehead, I backed up. I couldn’t think straight. I couldn’t think.

The fear in Jayce’s eyes was new as he watched me. It made everything snap into focus. I didn’t want to kill. Of course I didn’t. I was mad at him; more than mad. It didn’t change how I felt about him, though. We just had to navigate this.

“I need a minute,” I said.

“The gun, Alana.”

Still, I couldn’t move. I needed a minute.

Chapter 44

Note: This is the beginning of the no HEA ending. If you want the HEA ending, go to chapter 44B and finish from there.

Jayce

As I stared at her for long minutes, I felt more afraid than I ever had. Alicia wasn’t supposed to be up yet and she certainly wasn’t supposed to come down here. She must’ve been looking for us. Maybe she’d heard Alana scream or us arguing. I could only be grateful that she hadn’t been hurt, but I shouldn’t have given Alana the gun. Even though she couldn’t do any damage with it, convincing Alicia that nothing was wrong would be a feat. If she told anyone about what she’d seen, it could cause problems, especially when it came to the adoption. Her aunt aiming a gun at her uncle was not what the courts wanted to hear.

“Alana,” I repeated firmly. “We need to go back upstairs.”

She was a disaster. We needed to go back upstairs and figure all of this out. If I threw her over my shoulder, I didn’t know if it would make things worse. Maybe I could sedate her. There was a syringe in the cabinet behind her. I didn’t want to rush her and make her afraid of me right now.

Moving forward, I tentatively reached out. When she didn’t stop me, I cupped her face.

“Everything’s okay. Let’s figure this out together.”

Her brow furrowed. “She’ll be terrified of me.”

“No. She won’t even know you pulled the trigger.”

“I don’t want to scare her. I want…”

“What do you want, baby? Talk to me.”

“To be with you.”

The statement made me smile. “You are with me. We’ll always be together. I promise.”

Finally, her face relaxed a little. The change in her eyes made me feel better. She broke for a moment, but she was going to be okay. I’d put her back together. That was always the plan.

Steps on the stairs made me turn. They didn’t sound like Alicia’s- they were too heavy. When I heard more of them, my heart began to race. Alana backed up toward the wall, the fear evident on her face as she clutched the gun to her chest tightly.

I held my hand up. “It’s okay, Alana.”

Men with guns raised appeared in the doorway. I swore and took a step to the side to shield Alana.

“Drop the weapon!” they demanded.

Fuck. I turned to Alana with pleading eyes. “Hey, let’s do what they said, okay? Hand it to me.”

When I tried to pry it away, she wouldn’t budge and the struggle just made them yell louder. They repeated the order, but she didn’t move. She must’ve been in shock after everything. I kept a hand raised to tell the officers to wait. They adjusted their aim instead.

“No,” I shouted. “It’s okay. She’s not gonna do anything. There aren’t any bullets in it.”

“Drop the fucking gun!”

Tears streamed down her face. Her breaths had become panicked and the acceptance I’d seen in her eyes earlier had morphed back into something that was too dangerous for our current situation.

“Alana…” I ventured as I got closer.

As if she’d just noticed me, she jerked and drew the gun away from her chest. I lunged forward to take it just before a shot went off behind me. Pain erupted in my shoulder and made me stumble. I managed to grab the gun from her and tossed it to the side.

“It’s fine,” I told the officers. “She wasn’t going to fucking do anything. God damnit.”

I watched one of them take the gun from the floor. With that out of the way, I turned back to Alana.

“No,” I breathed.

She slid down the wall, holding her hand against her neck. Everything stopped in that moment. All I could see was the blood and the look on her face. Her eyes were wide with terror and pain. When she pulled her hand away, more blood poured from the wound.

“No, no, no,” I said, pulling her closer. I tried to stop the bleeding with my hand, but it just kept coming. Even slowed as it tore through my shoulder, the bullet had done so much damage. “Baby, look at me. Hey. It’s okay. It’s okay.”

Her head shook the slightest amount. When she met my eyes, she was no longer crying.

“I…” She choked and blood spilled out of her mouth. “I don’t want to… die.”

“I know. I know. You just have to breathe, okay? Someone will be here soon and they’ll fix it. They’re gonna fix it, baby.”

“I’m sorry… I didn’t… mean…”

“Shh. I did this. It’s my fault.”

One thing I’d learned about death was that it isn’t peaceful. The movies show someone slipping away on their last breath, then their eyes close. It was actually horrifically different than that in most cases.

“Sir, we need you to move.”

I shook my head, furious that they’d even tell me that. My palm pressed more firmly against Alana’s neck. Her blood painted my hands red, just like others had for her sake. It was all for her. It always was. But it led to this, so what had I actually accomplished? Wouldn’t I rather her be alive, even if I didn’t get to have her? No, I was selfish. I’d rather us both die than let her leave me.

“She’ll be okay,” I insisted. “She’s fine. It’s fine.”

“Sir.”

“No!” I shouted before I pulled her against my chest. She was weak and tired. Just weak and tired. “Alana, baby, wake up. You’re okay, you’re okay.”

I clutched her more tightly and began to rock back and forth. The way my body shuddered almost made it feel like she was moving. She was going to move again. She had to.

“We’re gonna go to Greece just like you want. We’re going to swim, touch all of the sculptures we’re not supposed to, and explore every cave they have. We’ll go hiking, even though you have terrible coordination and will probably sprain an ankle. I’ll carry you the whole time. I’ll always carry you. Do they have dolphins in Greece? We’ll find some, baby. I promise we’ll see everything you want.

“You’ll look so beautiful in those blue waters,” I went on. “I’ll take so many pictures. Not of the scenery; just of you. I never get tired of looking at you, baby. I just want you to smile for me and let me hear you talk. I want to listen to you talk forever. Please talk to me. I need to hear your voice.” Burying my face in her hair, I released a choked, pained sound. “Please talk to me. Please, please, please.”

“Medical is here,” one of the officers said.

“Sir, we need to have you checked out and we need you to tell us what happened.”

“You shot her,” I said. “You fucking shot her and she wasn’t going to hurt anyone.”

“We couldn’t know that, sir.”

“The gun was empty! Fuck!”

Someone took my arm and I shrugged them away. When they tried it again, I struck at them. The pain in my shoulder flared and it gave them the chance to thrust me onto my stomach. My hands were cuffed behind my back and no matter how hard I flailed, I couldn’t get free. The way my cheek was resting against the floor gave me a view of Alana. She was on her side with her hair covering most of her face. One of the paramedics crouched beside her to check for a pulse. I closed my eyes, unable to see them confirm it.

I couldn’t… I just couldn’t…

A couple months ago, I said there were two ways things could go. Both ended with me having Alana. There were no other options. But there was. No matter how much control I thought I had over the situation, something happened that I hadn’t planned for. She’d been taken from me. I had her, but now she was gone.

*****

After thinking about it while I healed in the hospital, I realized where I’d gone wrong. Jake. I should’ve just taken her from him before they fell in love. It would’ve worked. The day he brought her home, I should’ve shut that entire thing down. I’d waited too long. It was the act of a coward to give her a chance to be happy with him. I always intended to take her, so why did I wait so long?

It was my love for my brother. That never should’ve mattered, but I agonized over it because I knew that in order to have her, he had to die. The me that existed now, here in this hospital bed, wouldn’t hesitate. I’d been more hands off about it when I killed him. In the midst of the flames, I watched him blink out of existence, but now… Now, I would wrap my fingers around his throat and crush the life out of him. And then, I’d tell Alana. We would have dealt with it. I would’ve shown her who I was immediately and nobody would have the chance to ruin it.

I couldn’t bring myself to be angry at Alicia for calling the police. She’d come downstairs and saw Alana pointing a gun at me. It should’ve gone through my mind that she would do that, but I’d only been concerned with keeping Alana from spiraling and dealing with Alicia together. It was supposed to be fine. The gun wasn’t fucking loaded. It should’ve been fine.

I didn’t know how to explain it to the cops, but I’d spun a story on the spot. I refused to let them think she was some villain. Alicia saw wrong. I’d been showing Alana my gun because she wanted to learn how to use it after she’d been threatened by Mike. It wasn’t loaded and she was feeling out its weight. When the cops showed up, she had flashbacks of when Mike tried to attack her. What happened was their fault and I made sure that everybody knew it.

It didn’t really matter in the end. To them, she’d fucked up by not complying with their demands. Sure, she wasn’t the bad guy, but they still blamed her and that pissed me the fuck off.

Could I manage to kill all of the officers that had been on the scene? Probably not, but maybe. I could play the long game and pick them off slowly. None of them should have the luxury of surviving after what they’d done to her. They’d stolen from me and that wasn’t something I’d ever forgive. I wanted nothing more than to join Alana in whatever afterlife she’d found, but I had to do this first. I had a purpose for now. When it was complete, I’d find her. I would always find her. I promised her forever and she’d asked for no more lies.

The door opened and I saw Charlie’s face. She looked timid, probably afraid of my mental state. That was smart. I’d thought about killing every nurse and doctor who came in here. Instead of acknowledging her, I rolled toward the window, even though it hurt my shoulder. Maybe it’d fuck up the stitches. I had plans of revenge, but if something like blood loss killed me, I wouldn’t complain.

Chapter 45

Jayce

Bringing the bottle to my lips, I did my best to ignore my uninvited company. They’d been on my ass for days; ever since I left the hospital. I didn’t give a single fuck about them right now.

“You need to come,” Dad insisted.

“No.”

Charlie sat down beside me on the couch. “It’s her funeral. If you don’t come, you’ll regret it later.”

I turned to her. “Why? Her funeral doesn’t do anything for me. You want me to watch you put her in the ground? Fuck that.”

“Jayce…”

“Get the fuck out of my house.”

She sighed and shook her head. “You need closure.”

Closure wasn’t necessary. There was no reality where I accepted Alana’s death. I would never let her go and I didn’t intend to live without her. My resolve was unwavering, so much that I didn’t care if it hurt them. It was selfish for people to claim that you should survive for the sake of others. If someone wanted to die, they should be allowed to do that without being made to feel guilty.

I didn’t know how long it took for them to leave. I just continued to drink. Eventually, when the shadows in the living room lengthened, I looked up and saw that I was alone. Given the time, the funeral was probably over by now.

Seeing Alana put in the ground didn’t interest me. She wasn’t going to stay there. There was one place she belonged and that was with me.

I waited until it was after midnight. The alcohol still saturated my blood, but not enough for me to be an idiot. It took me twenty minutes to reach the cemetery, which was dark and quiet. There was a guard who patrolled the grounds, but I’d done this before after Jake died. Easy peasy.

Clearing my throat, I called the security company they employed here. A woman answered after only a few rings.

“Guardian Security.”

“Hello,” I greeted politely. The kindness in my voice sounded foreign to me right now. “I was passing by Starford Cemetery a few minutes ago. My dad is buried there, so I say a prayer every time I drive by.”

“That’s beautiful.”

“Yes, absolutely. Well, I looked at it and saw a car parked in the lot. It didn’t look like the one your guards use, so I turned around to drive by again. Someone in a dark hoodie got out of it and seems to be lurking the grounds. I just wanted to let you know so that you can make sure everything’s okay.”

“Alright, sir. Thanks so much for letting us know. I’ll have them check it out.”

I ended the call, then got out of my car. There was a small office in front of me, so I moved over to it and leaned against the wall. It took enough time that if there was an actual threat, they probably would’ve been gone by now. Well, there was a threat, but I wasn’t going anywhere.

A flashlight beam appeared off to the side just before the guy came into view. He approached my truck slowly, shining the light inside of it. I pushed off the wall and quietly came up behind him. Last time, I’d been careful to avoid him. That wasn’t the plan this time.

Grabbing him by the back of the hair, I slammed his face against the window. Disoriented, he stumbled to the side. I could’ve just killed him, but I needed an outlet, so I put a gloved hand over his mouth and nose while I pinned him to the door. He flailed and tried to pry my hand away, unsuccessfully. After his eyes closed and his body slumped, I tied him up and gagged him, then tossed him into the back seat.

With that out of the way, I grabbed my shovel and headed toward my target.

“Don’t worry, baby. I’m getting you out of here.”

*****

Alana looked beautiful surrounded by flowers. I’d used my usual materials to surround her in the vessel but added more to it. Nestled among it all, she was radiant. It reinforced how perfect she was. To look just as stunning as she had in life was a hell of a feat. But, of course, she accomplished it.

I trailed my fingers down the side of her face. With my thumb, I brushed over her cheekbone, then her lips. If I had less of my wits about me, I’d probably want to preserve her and keep her down here, but that wouldn’t help anything. She’d still decompose and I had no interest in freezing her, so I’d do the next best thing. I would keep her forever but also give her a purpose. It’s what I would want for myself if the roles were reversed. I liked to believe that she would choose to join me in death just like I was going to.

Along with my emotions came more anger. I couldn’t keep it away for long. There was something more infuriating about a tragedy that was outside of your control but happened because of what you’d done.

If I hadn’t given her that gun… If I’d blocked her better and taken the bullet somewhere it would have lodged inside of me. If I’d said something different to the officers. If I’d tried harder to take the gun before they got there. If… If… If…

I took a deep breath and shook my head. It couldn’t be changed. I accomplished what I wanted to do. I had her and it didn’t matter that I’d lost her. With her, I peaked, so now I just had to plan for the day I returned to her.

Brushing my fingers through her hair, I continued to stare down at her. Some people would say that it was easy to imagine they were sleeping. I couldn’t do that, nor did I want to. One thing I wouldn’t do was become delusional about it. I’d force myself to face it every day. I’d come down here and watch as she became part of nature. I’d use her body to make a new batch of wine untouched by anyone else. Then, I would drink it and that would be the end.

“Is that…”

I whirled around, trying to position myself in front of Alana. Alicia stared with wide eyes, then looked at me.

“Alicia, what the fuck are you doing here?”

“I…” She dropped her gaze. “I wanted to see you.”

“How’d you get here? Did someone bring you?”

I peered around her. If one of my parents was here, I didn’t know what I’d do. They definitely wouldn’t be okay with this. They’d probably try to have me committed.

“I took a bus,” she said. “A couple of them. My phone told me which ones.”

Swiping a hand down my face, I tried to come up with an explanation. What the fuck would I say? She was too old to believe my excuses.

“What are you doing to her?” she asked, taking a few steps forward.

I regarded her carefully, then moved to the side. She walked the rest of the way to the vessel and looked at Alana. Her head cocked. I didn’t think she seemed scared; more curious.

“I’m immortalizing her,” I replied.

“Is that what you did to my dad?’

My mouth opened, but it took me a minute to respond. “No.”

“I heard you from the stairs that day.” She looked down at her feet. “I’m sorry I was eavesdropping.”

Coming up behind her, I put a hand on her shoulder. “So, you heard everything?” She nodded. “Aren’t you… angry? Or scared.”

“I was, but then being scared got Aunt Alana killed. It was my fault.”

Fuck.

Turning her around, I crouched so that we were eye to eye. “You didn’t know. You thought you were helping.”

“But I should’ve known you wouldn’t hurt each other. You loved her and she loved you.”

“Sometimes, people still hurt each other, love or no love.” With a sigh, I tucked her hair behind her ears. “You’re not little, so I’m not going to lie to you. That’s not how our relationship works. I was mad. I still am mad and part of me wants to direct that at you. But I can’t.”

A tear made a path down her cheek. “Why not?”

“Because you’re my niece. Genetically, you’re basically my own kid. And you’re nine.”

“And three quarters.”

I breathed a laugh. “Yeah, exactly. You were scared and I know that you didn’t want either of us to get hurt.”

A little sob shook her shoulders. “I didn’t want anyone to get hurt. Not after… mom… and Jake. But now Alana-”

I shushed her. “You’ve already lost a lot. Let’s not add guilt to your list of issues to deal with, okay?” Straightening, I nodded toward the door. “You need to go home before your grandparents start freaking out.”

“Can I stay? I want to learn.”

“Learn what?”

She looked at the vessel. “How to immortalize someone. Then, if I lose anybody else, I can do the same thing.”

Hm. This was… fucked up. Alicia knew that I killed Jake and Mike already and she was witness to me composting the love of my life. If she wasn’t running for the hills and screaming already, maybe she could handle it. I shouldn’t let her do this, but it seemed less twisted than everything else.

Was I going to teach my niece how to biodegrade a body? Yeah, because why not? Hiding who I was ruined Alana. There was no hiding or lying to this kid now. Maybe it was better if I kept her close and made sure she didn’t break after what she’d been through. Hopefully it didn’t turn her into a sociopath or something. I wouldn’t deny that after I did this to Jake, I wanted to do it again. It was interesting to me and shit, it was good for my plants.

“Alright,” I decided. “Go grab a stool from upstairs. I’ll show you how it works. And pick a flower from the backyard so you can add your own. What’s your favorite color?”

“Green.”

“Get one of the hydrangeas near the shed.”

She flashed me a smile before she took off. It looked like I’d be imparting all of my knowledge to her. Well, not the murder part.

One day, she could do this to me. It was an oddly comforting thought. Rather than being put in the ground and going to waste, I’d become like Alana. Maybe Alicia would make wine out of us both and set us together on a shelf. I liked that idea.

Well, this was my fucked up legacy. In a way, I guess I had my brother to thank for it. He’d started this whole mess and he’d brought Alicia into the world.

I looked at the final bottle of Jake wine on a shelf. “Well, here’s to you, brother. Looks like your daughter is gonna be a lot more like her uncle than her father. You couldn’t take care of either of them. I hope you burn in hell for eternity because all of this,” I gestured toward Alana, “is on you.”

Chapter 46

Jayce

A groan behind me made my lips curve. “Well, it’s about damn fucking time.”

“Where?” he croaked.

I turned around and took in his groggy and terrified expression. He moved his hands, then looked down at them with wide eyes when he realized they were cuffed to the sides of the bed. As if there was any hope for him, he yanked on them harder.

“Do you remember me?” I asked.

His brow furrowed. “No.”

“Hm.” I moved closer, trailing my fingers over the bedrails. He was breathing heavily as I approached. I imagined that with every step, his mind was clearing further. “We go way back, Officer Burkley.”

“Look, if I arrested your dad or something, I get that you’re mad. This is gonna get you in major trouble, though.”

“My dad? Nah, he’s just fine. Right now, he’s on vacation with my moms and their friends. Yeah, they met some people while they were on the west coast and now, they take annual trips to Switzerland. Cool, huh?”

He shook his head. “Who are you?”

“You’re so impatient. I’ll give you a hint.” Shifting my t-shirt to show him my shoulder, I tapped on the scar. “Still don’t remember? I guess the people you kill don’t stick with you. Do they not matter, Burkley?”

After blinking a few times, he looked around the basement. When his eyes landed on the fake door, which was currently open, his lips parted.

“You… The girl with the gun.”

The back of my hand connected with his cheek hard enough for his head to whip to the side. “Girl with the gun. That’s a massive simplification. The gun wasn’t loaded. She would never hurt anybody. She was going to give me the fucking thing, but you shot her.”

“She moved too quickly,” he stammered. “It looked like she was going to aim it at us.”

“You’re a scared little bitch. Want to know where your true mistake lies? Your bullet hit me, but it killed her. Leaving me alive will cost you everything because I’m the one who’s dangerous, not her. I’m the fucking monster in this story.”

“Sir, I… Please.”

I flicked my wrist to open the knife at my side. His eyes landed on it briefly before he looked up at the ceiling. Maybe he was accepting his fate. Or he was praying. Acceptance and prayer wouldn’t help what he was going to experience.

Leaning my elbows on the bedrail, I trailed the tip of the blade up his naked chest. “My niece has been learning about composting. That’s a healthy hobby, right? Good for the planet, even. You’re going to help.”

“How?”

“Well, I took care of the other three officers who were here. Spaced them out by two years each so I wouldn’t get caught or draw suspicion. Were you aware they all died?’

He swallowed hard. “Just one of them. Officer Vanderbilt.”

“Yeah, he was the first. The other two worked for different departments when I got to them. Miami and Bakersville. It was a pain in the ass to get them. Lots of travel and whatnot. Six years, Burkley. Six fucking years I’ve been waiting to fuck you up for ripping my soul from me.”

“I’m sorry,” he whispered.

“And I appreciate that, of course. Doesn’t change anything, though.”

Footsteps on the stairs made me glance over my shoulder. His gaze followed mine, then he sat forward.

“Please. Help me. He’s gonna hurt me.”

A light laugh came from behind me. “How sad.”

“You… I don’t… Oh my god. You’re the kid.”

“Was the kid. I’m sixteen. Almost seventeen, thank you very much.”

“You’re both crazy. You’re sick.”

Alicia mocked him, then came up beside me. “That’s so cliché, dude. What, are we supposed to let you go because you think we have issues?” She looked at me and cocked her head. “Do we have issues?”

I shrugged. “Maybe. You have my genes, so I’d venture to say that’s the issue.”

“Ooh,” she said, drawing out the word. “Maybe it’s, like, one of those things where it was inside of me the whole time and all the shit I went through as a kid activated it or something.”

“Hm. You should go into psychology.”

“Maybe I will.”

“The girl who died,” Burkley blurted. His voice had reached a higher pitch with his growing desperation. “She wouldn’t want this, right? You said she wouldn’t hurt anybody. She’d hate to see you do this.”

I raised a brow. “That’s a stretch. Don’t act like you know her. You killed her, so in the end, it doesn’t really matter.”

Alicia tried to take the knife from me, but I pulled it back with a frown. “You know better.”

“Oh, come on.”

I pointed it at her. “Not until you’re an adult. I have to hold onto some boundaries, you know.”

When she pouted, I laughed and turned back to Burkley. “My niece had an idea and I think it’s the most ridiculous thing ever, but hey, who am I to tell her she can’t explore her creative side?”

Alicia held up a jar of peanut butter with a wicked glint in her eyes. Not for the first time, I questioned my decisions. Agreeing to teach her about composting was one thing. I waited until she was fifteen to let her do it on her own, after I killed the third officer. I should’ve taken into account that fucked up desires tended to grow and morph into worse things. She hadn’t taken a life, but she was very interested and continued to lean into the darkness. There was really no fixing that; I knew that firsthand. All I could do was make her wait and, hopefully, teach her how to avoid prison.

Maybe Alana would be angry about it. Like I said, though, it didn’t really matter. The plan was always to join her in death after I killed Burkley. I still hated my existence without her, but I also knew that Alicia wasn’t ready for me to be gone. She loved her grandparents and fit right in but that dark, wretched piece of her soul was her dirty little secret. And mine. I’d woken it up, so I needed to make sure it didn’t fuck her up completely.

“What are you gonna do with that?” Burkley asked.

Alicia didn’t respond as she unscrewed the lid and scooped some out with a spoon. When she squeezed his cheeks to force his mouth open, he turned and tried to bite her. She shoved the heaping spoonful into his mouth and he grunted. She did one more so that it was completely full, then slapped a piece of duct tape over his lips.

I crossed my arms over my chest as I watched him struggle. “What’s the point?”

“Maybe he’ll suffocate,” she replied. “He can’t open his mouth to help him get all that shit down. It might get stuck in his throat.”

“And where’d you get this idea?”

She smiled. “I was eating a PB&J in the cafeteria and choked on it. I had to guzzle some water and it did that thing where food is stuck and it’s super painful to get it down. I saw my life flash before my eyes.”

I snorted a laugh. “Right. Glad you didn’t die right there in the cafeteria.”

“It’d be horrible. Imagine haunting a high school forever. Being known as the peanut butter gobbler would not be cool.”

A fearful hum came from Burkley’s throat. He looked at us with desperation in his eyes. He gagged, then struggled to catch his breath. Maybe she was onto something. Death by peanut butter.

To make it more interesting, I positioned my knife behind his knee and made a deep slice. He tried to scream, but it only made things worse for him. I watched his throat bob multiple times as he tried to swallow.

I pointed with my knife toward the opposite wall. There were three jars on a shelf, each one filled with fertilizer. Three bottles of wine were stationed behind them.

“Those are your buddies. In a few months, you’ll join them up there. How nurturing do you think your body will be? None will be as good as her, that’s for sure.”

He stared at another shelf with a picture of Alana and a similar jar, but hers was nicer. There were a few bottles left because I couldn’t bring myself to drink them. I had one every couple of years. Jake’s last bottle was beside hers and one day, mine would be there too. It would be Jake, Jayce, and Alana. Just like it’d been since we were fourteen. She would like that.

Epilogue

Ferris

I have a stalker.

I don’t think my stalker knows that I know. But I do. I’ve seen them. I don’t know if it’s a man or a woman. They’re always in the shadows. Just a glimpse and they’re gone again.

Then, there are the kisses. Like, Hershey fucking kisses. I find the wrappers in my bushes and shit. Why? No goddamn clue. I don’t eat them and I don’t know anyone who just carries them around in their pockets. That’s freaking weird.

Maybe I should get cameras. It’d be a good idea. But… Nobody ever said I make good decisions. My life is boring and I’ve found myself looking out the window at night, looking for them.

Why would someone stalk me? I was probably the most unremarkable guy in existence. Mostly, I sat in my favorite coffee shop with my laptop. I wrote mystery and thriller novels, which might explain my morbid interest in this person who could very well be dangerous.

So, yeah. I have a stalker. And right now, they were standing under the tree at the edge of my property while I sipped my coffee and acted like I didn’t know they were there.

I sucked in a breath when they took a step forward. They looked smaller than I thought they would, but in their dark clothes it was difficult to make out any specifics. Suddenly, their face lit up. Two green Xs for eyes and a stitched mouth.

Was this an official introduction?

It was very likely this was going to get me killed.

Might make a good book, though.

Chapter 44B

Note: This is the beginning of the HEA ending. It starts the same as the no HEA, so if you read that one, there will be repetition in this chapter. The Epilogues are exactly the same.

Jayce

As I stared at her for long minutes, I felt more afraid than I ever had. Alicia wasn’t supposed to be up yet and she certainly wasn’t supposed to come down here. She must’ve been looking for us. Maybe she’d heard Alana scream or us arguing. I could only be grateful that she hadn’t been hurt, but I shouldn’t have given Alana the gun. Even though she couldn’t do any damage with it, convincing Alicia that nothing was wrong would be a feat. If she told anyone about what she’d seen, it could cause problems, especially when it came to the adoption. Her aunt aiming a gun at her uncle was not what the courts wanted to hear.

“Alana,” I repeated firmly. “We need to go back upstairs.”

She was a disaster. We needed to go back upstairs and figure all of this out. If I threw her over my shoulder, I didn’t know if it would make things worse. Maybe I could sedate her. There was a syringe in the cabinet behind her. I didn’t want to rush her and make her afraid of me right now.

Moving forward, I tentatively reached out. When she didn’t stop me, I cupped her face.

“Everything’s okay. Let’s figure this out together.”

Her brow furrowed. “She’ll be terrified of me.”

“No. She won’t even know you pulled the trigger.”

“I don’t want to scare her. I want…”

“What do you want, baby? Talk to me.”

“To be with you.”

The statement made me smile. “You are with me. We’ll always be together. I promise.”

Finally, her face relaxed a little. The change in her eyes made me feel better. She broke for a moment, but she was going to be okay. I’d put her back together. That was always the plan.

Steps on the stairs made me turn. They didn’t sound like Alicia’s- they were too heavy. When I heard more of them, my heart began to race. Alana backed up toward the wall, the fear evident on her face as she clutched the gun to her chest tightly.

I held my hand up. “It’s okay, Alana.”

Men with guns raised appeared in the doorway. I swore and took a step to the side to shield Alana.

“Drop the weapon!” they demanded.

Fuck. I turned to Alana with pleading eyes. “Hey, let’s do what they said, okay? Hand it to me.”

When I tried to pry it away, she wouldn’t budge and the struggle just made them yell louder. They repeated the order, but she didn’t move. She must’ve been in shock after everything. I kept a hand raised to tell the officers to wait. They adjusted their aim instead.

“No,” I shouted. “It’s okay. She’s not gonna do anything. There aren’t any bullets in it.”

“Drop the fucking gun!”

Tears streamed down her face. Her breaths had become panicked and the acceptance I’d seen in her eyes earlier had morphed back into something that was too dangerous for our current situation.

“Alana…” I ventured as I got closer.

As if she’d just noticed me, she jerked and drew the gun away from her chest. I lunged forward to take it just before a shot went off behind me. Pain erupted in my shoulder and made me stumble. I managed to grab the gun from her and tossed it to the side.

“It’s fine,” I told the officers. “She wasn’t going to fucking do anything. God damnit.”

I watched one of them take the gun from the floor. With that out of the way, I turned back to Alana.

“No,” I breathed.

She slid down the wall, holding her hand against her neck. Everything stopped in that moment. All I could see was the blood and the look on her face. Her eyes were wide with terror and pain. When she pulled her hand away, more blood poured from the wound.

“No, no, no,” I said, pulling her closer. I tried to stop the bleeding with my hand, but it just kept coming. Even slowed as it tore through my shoulder, the bullet had done so much damage. “Baby, look at me. Hey. It’s okay. It’s okay.”

Her head shook the slightest amount. When she met my eyes, she was no longer crying.

“I…” She choked and blood spilled out of her mouth. “I don’t want to… die.”

“I know. I know. You just have to breathe, okay? Someone will be here soon and they’ll fix it. They’re gonna fix it, baby.”

“I’m sorry… I didn’t… mean…”

“Shh. I did this. It’s my fault.”

One thing I’d learned about death was that it isn’t peaceful. The movies show someone slipping away on their last breath, then their eyes close. It was actually horrifically different than that in most cases.

“Sir, we need you to move.”

I shook my head, furious that they’d even tell me that. My palm pressed more firmly against Alana’s neck. Her blood painted my hands red, just like others had for her sake. It was all for her. It always was. But it led to this, so what had I actually accomplished? Wouldn’t I rather her be alive, even if I didn’t get to have her? No, I was selfish. I’d rather us both die than let her leave me.

“She’ll be okay,” I insisted. “She’s fine. It’s fine.”

“Sir.”

“No!” I shouted before I pulled her against my chest. She was weak and tired. Just weak and tired. “Alana, baby, wake up. You’re okay, you’re okay.”

I clutched her more tightly and began to rock back and forth. The way my body shuddered almost made it feel like she was moving. She was going to move again. She had to.

“We’re gonna go to Greece just like you want. We’re going to swim, touch all of the sculptures we’re not supposed to, and explore every cave they have. We’ll go hiking, even though you have terrible coordination and will probably sprain an ankle. I’ll carry you the whole time. I’ll always carry you. Do they have dolphins in Greece? We’ll find some, baby. I promise we’ll see everything you want.

“You’ll look so beautiful in those blue waters,” I went on. “I’ll take so many pictures. Not of the scenery; just of you. I never get tired of looking at you, baby. I just want you to smile for me and let me hear you talk. I want to listen to you talk forever. Please talk to me. I need to hear your voice.” Burying my face in her hair, I released a choked, pained sound. “Please talk to me. Please, please, please.”

“Medical is here,” one of the officers said.

“Sir, we need to have you checked out and we need you to tell us what happened.”

“You shot her,” I said. “You fucking shot her and she wasn’t going to hurt anyone.”

“We couldn’t know that, sir.”

“The gun was empty! Fuck!”

Someone took my arm and I shrugged them away. When they tried it again, I struck at them. The pain in my shoulder flared and it gave them the chance to thrust me onto my stomach. My hands were cuffed behind my back and no matter how hard I flailed, I couldn’t get free. The way my cheek was resting against the floor gave me a view of Alana. She was on her side with her hair covering most of her face. One of the paramedics crouched beside her to check for a pulse. I closed my eyes, unable to see them confirm it.

I couldn’t… I just couldn’t…

A couple months ago, I said there were two ways things could go. Both ended with me having Alana. There were no other options. But there was. No matter how much control I thought I had over the situation, something happened that I hadn’t planned for. She’d been taken from me. I had her, but now she was gone.

“Get the stretcher,” the woman called.

I craned my neck to see the person bringing it. He collapsed it and they got Alana onto it. I thrashed again, desperate to go wherever they were taking her.

“Let me go,” I demanded. “Let me go!”

“Sir, you need to calm down.”

“Let me go with her. Please. Fuck, please let me go with her.”

He looked at someone behind him, then got me to my feet. They kept the cuffs on but brought me upstairs. As we approached, I kept my eyes on the ambulance they loaded Alana into. Once we got in, they freed my hands and I covered my mouth with them, not daring to tear my gaze away from her.

“Sir, let me see your shoulder,” one of the paramedics said.

I let them do what they wanted, but I refused to lay down or look at them. “Is she going to be okay?”

“We don’t know yet. It doesn’t look like the bullet went through her trachea, but we just can’t tell until she gets to the hospital.”

Maybe it slowed down enough when it hit me. Maybe, just maybe. I could work with that.

*****

After thinking about it while I sat in the hospital, I realized where I’d gone wrong. Jake. I should’ve just taken her from him before they fell in love. It would’ve worked. The day he brought her home, I should’ve shut that entire thing down. I’d waited too long. It was the act of a coward to give her a chance to be happy with him. I always intended to take her, so why did I wait so long?

It was my love for my brother. That never should’ve mattered, but I agonized over it because I knew that in order to have her, he had to die. The me that existed now, here in this hospital, wouldn’t hesitate. I’d been more hands off about it when I killed him. In the midst of the flames, I watched him blink out of existence, but now… Now, I would wrap my fingers around his throat and crush the life out of him. And then, I’d tell Alana. We would have dealt with it. I would’ve shown her who I was immediately and nobody would have the chance to ruin it.

I couldn’t bring myself to be angry at Alicia for calling the police. She’d come downstairs and saw Alana pointing a gun at me. It should’ve gone through my mind that she would do that, but I’d only been concerned with keeping Alana from spiraling and dealing with Alicia together. It was supposed to be fine. The gun wasn’t fucking loaded. It should’ve been fine.

Looking over at Alana, I felt just as worried as I had been this whole time. She’d woken up after surgery, but she wasn’t alert. They had her on a lot of drugs and said it could take time for her to feel okay enough to stay awake long. She’d lost a lot of blood, then went through surgery. It was probably better if she stayed out for a little longer. She was going to be in pain and I hated that.

The paramedics were right, at least. It lodged in her trachea, but not enough to go through, so it wouldn’t fuck up her ability to talk or eat. She’d have a scar on her throat, which she’d hate, but I’d make sure she always felt beautiful.

If she made it through this. When she made it through this. No other options.

Ever since we’d gotten here, I’d been angry. I didn’t let them keep me in a bed and I rarely left this chair. When they tried to say shit about visiting hours, I told them I was admitted here and would go where I pleased. If they wanted me gone, they’d have to forcibly remove me. Dad had talked to them more kindly and they’d decided to just leave me be.

I didn’t know how to explain it to the cops, but I’d spun a story on the spot. I refused to let them think she was some villain. Alicia saw wrong. I’d been showing Alana my gun because she wanted to learn how to use it after she’d been threatened by Mike. It wasn’t loaded and she was feeling out its weight. When the cops showed up, she had flashbacks of when Mike tried to attack her. What happened was their fault and I made sure that everybody knew it.

It didn’t really matter in the end. To them, she’d fucked up by not complying with their demands. Sure, she wasn’t the bad guy and she wasn’t in trouble for it, but they still blamed her and that pissed me the fuck off.

I couldn’t stop thinking about those officers. Could I manage to kill all of the ones who had been on the scene? Probably not, but maybe. I could play the long game and pick them off slowly. None of them should have the luxury of surviving after what they’d done to her. They’d nearly stolen her from me and that wasn’t something I’d ever forgive.

The door opened and I saw Charlie’s face. She looked timid, probably afraid of my mental state. That was smart. I’d thought about killing every nurse and doctor who came in here. Instead of acknowledging her, I looked at Alana again.

“If you’re gonna stay here, you need to at least eat.”

I shook my head without a word. After a minute, she appeared in front of me, blocking my view. I gave her a venomous look that made her eyes widen. Then, she narrowed them.

“You love her,” she said. “But we all do. You don’t get to act like an asshole because something bad happened.”

“Fuck you, Charlie.”

Her palm connected with my face. Closing my eyes, I took some deep breaths.

“Fuck me?” she hissed. “I’ve known about your crush on Alana since you first met her. It was obvious to anyone who would’ve cared to look. I didn’t tell anyone, I didn’t try to steer you away, even though I know that sort of obsession can be dangerous.”

I met her eyes, trying to gauge her state right now. Did she know something? Doubtful, but she wasn’t making me feel glad for her presence, that was for sure.

“Your brother died and everything worked out for you,” she went on. “Love through tragedy or whatever. She survived being shot. Both of you did. Now, get the fuck over yourself and let your family be here for you. We love her like a daughter and we’re all worried sick.”

“Fine.”

Her nostrils flared, but she took a step back. It was all I could give her right now, so she would have to accept it. Until Alana woke up, I didn’t want their love or encouragement. I’d never lied when I said that she mattered to me more than anything else. I loved my family to death, but if someone held a gun to their heads and asked me to choose between all of them and Alana, I would choose her without hesitation. And I didn’t think that was wrong. If it was, I didn’t give a fuck.

Chapter 45B

Jayce

Steepling my fingers under my chin, I stared at the woman who occupied my thoughts twenty-four hours a day. I’d allowed my parents to come in and sit with me for a bit, even though every second was torture. I just wanted to be alone with her. Sharing her pissed me off right now. I felt more protective of her than I ever had and even the people taking care of her here didn’t have my trust.

I missed her voice. And her eyes. I’d lifted her lids a while ago, but it made things worse. Like that, it was too hard to imagine that she was dead. There was no life or emotion in them. No recognition.

Getting to my feet, I bit down on my lip. I needed to feel like she was alive. I needed to feel like I was alive.

The nurse left a few minutes ago, so they wouldn’t be back for a little while. I locked the door, then turned back to Alana. After I unzipped my pants, I moved her blanket down to her ankles. Carefully, I adjusted the tubes and everything attached to her, making sure nothing would be messed up.

“This is sort of like old times,” I told her, trying to sound more lighthearted than I felt.

I lifted her gown and ran my fingers over her slit. Leaning back, I released a stream of spit and spread it slowly toward her entrance. Once I started, her body would respond to my touch. She might wake up, but she’d be even more out of it than when she was drunk in her bed.

When I slipped a finger inside of her, my cock hardened. I imagined that warmth wrapped around me, squeezing the life out of me. With my hand braced beside her head, I continued to move in and out, opening her up for me. Her pussy grew wet, making each movement audible in the quiet room.

I removed my fingers and spread her wetness over my shaft before I pressed my cock against her. Desperation pushed me to thrust inside of her without waiting any longer. A whimper left her lips and her eyelids fluttered, then she passed out again. I moved slower on the way out, even though I didn’t want to be gentle with her.

“God, baby,” I moaned as I buried myself again. “Remember when I told you that you’d be full of my cum every day? I meant that. I’ve meant every promise I made to you.” I thrust into her as deep as I could with each of my next words. “Every. Single. One.”

Dropping onto my elbow, I used my other hand to bend her knee. The bed creaked as I fucked her, but I didn’t care. Nothing could stop me from having Alana. I’d taken her body while she fought me and I’d do it again without a shred of remorse.

I leaned down and bit her nipple through the gown. It made her jerk just a little. Pressing my lips softly against the side of her neck, I rolled my hips repeatedly, not just chasing my orgasm, but hers as well.

“You may be unconscious,” I murmured. “But you can still cum for me, baby.”

I reached between us to roll her clit between two fingers. The beeping on the machine quickened and so did my pace. Sitting up, I used my thumbs to spread her open so that I could see her take my cock. Every time it disappeared inside of her, I had to hold back my orgasm. The way it glistened with her arousal was one of my favorite sights in the world.

As I moved my thumb back and forth over her clit, her pussy tightened around me. Alana’s fingers clutched at the sheet and she was breathing heavily. I didn’t know how awake she was, but it wasn’t enough for her to be alert. As long as she could feel the pleasure wherever she was right now, I was satisfied.

“That’s it, baby. Cum on my cock.”

Another whimper escaped her lips. I leaned down and kissed her as my muscles contracted. Unable to keep going, I let myself finish while I was deep inside of her. I gasped against her mouth, lost in the way she felt. The things this woman did to me.

“You are my future,” I panted. “You can sleep a little longer, but you’re coming back to me in the morning, do you understand?”

God, I needed to hear her voice.

It would just be a little longer.

After I brushed my fingers over her wet pussy, I pulled out of her and started to clean her up.

*****

A sound drew me out of sleep. I straightened in the chair immediately and looked at Alana, but she was just as still as before. Turning to the door, I saw a smaller figure standing there.

“Alicia?” I said, rubbing my eyes. When I opened them, she was closer and I swore. This was some horror movie shit to wake up to. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

“I…” She dropped her gaze. “I wanted to see you.”

“How’d you get here? Did someone bring you?”

I peered around her, but the door was closed and nobody else was in the room.

“I took a bus,” she said. “A couple of them. My phone told me which ones.”

Swiping a hand down my face, I tried to clear my head. A couple of hours ago, I’d been fucking Alana’s unconscious body. Now, there was a nine year old in front of me who should’ve been at home.

“Is she okay?” She looked over at Alana with a furrowed brow.

I regarded her carefully, then leaned forward. “Yeah, she’ll be fine. Just needs some more rest.”

“If she died, would you do what you did to my dad?”

My mouth opened, but it took me a minute to respond. “I don’t understand.”

“I heard you from the stairs yesterday.” She looked down at her feet. “I’m sorry I was eavesdropping.”

I put a hand on her shoulder. “So, you heard everything?” She nodded. “Aren’t you… angry? Or scared.”

“I was, but then being scared got Aunt Alana hurt. It was my fault.”

Fuck.

Pulling her closer, I met her eyes. “You didn’t know. You thought you were helping.”

“But I should’ve known you wouldn’t hurt each other. You love her and she loves you.”

“Sometimes, people still hurt each other, love or no love.” With a sigh, I tucked her hair behind her ears. “You’re not little, so I’m not going to lie to you. That’s not how our relationship works. I was mad. I still am mad and part of me wants to direct that at you. But I can’t.”

A tear made a path down her cheek. “Why not?”

“Because you’re my niece. Genetically, you’re basically my own kid. And you’re nine.”

“And three quarters.”

I breathed a laugh. “Yeah, exactly. You were scared and I know that you didn’t want either of us to get hurt.”

A little sob shook her shoulders. “I didn’t want anyone to get hurt. Not after… mom… and Jake. But now Alana-”

I shushed her. “Alana will be just fine. You’ve already lost a lot. Let’s not add guilt to your list of issues to deal with, okay?” Straightening, I nodded toward the door. “You need to go home before your grandparents start freaking out.”

“Can I stay?”

“Why?”

“Because I want to be here when she wakes up. She needs some flowers.”

“You’re probably right. What’s your favorite color?”

“Green,” she answered immediately.

“Alright, when the shop opens downstairs, we can go see if they have any green ones. Hydrangeas, maybe.”

She nodded excitedly. I stared at her for another minute, trying to figure out what to say.

“Alicia…” I took a deep breath. “What happened to your dad…”

“You told Alana that he was dangerous. If you were protecting her, that makes it okay, right?”

“I mean, no?” Thinning my lips, I thought about a better way to answer. “It’s complicated. Maybe we can talk about it when you’re a little older.”

She looked at Alana again. “What do those weird, glass coffins do? The ones in your basement.”

“They… Immortalize someone. After they die.”

“Will you teach me?”

“Teach you what?”

“How to immortalize someone. Then, if I lose anybody else, I can do the same thing.”

Hm. This was… fucked up. Alicia knew that I killed Jake and Mike already. If she wasn’t running for the hills and screaming already, maybe she could handle it. I shouldn’t do anything like this, but it seemed less twisted than everything else in a weird way.

Was I going to teach my niece how to biodegrade a body? Possibly, because why not? Hiding who I was almost ruined Alana. There was no hiding or lying to this kid now. Maybe it was better if I kept her close and made sure she didn’t break after what she’d been through. Hopefully it didn’t turn her into a sociopath or something. I wouldn’t deny that after I did this to Jake, I wanted to do it again. It was interesting to me and shit, it was good for my plants.

“Alright,” I decided. “I’ll show you how it works if you want, but not until you’re older. And you can’t say a word to anybody. Remember when you promised you wouldn’t tell Mike I was in your room?” She nodded, barely containing a smile. “But listen to me. Anyone else ever asks you to keep secrets like that, you tell me immediately.”

The last thing I wanted was for her to learn that she should follow those kinds of instructions. Nobody in her life would hurt her, but that didn’t mean someone couldn’t come along. And what would I do in that case? Kill them, obviously.

I motioned toward the other chair. She flashed me a smile before she sat down.

It looked like I’d be imparting all of my knowledge to her. Well, not the murder part. One day, she could do this to me and Alana. It was an oddly comforting thought. Rather than being put in the ground and going to waste, I’d be immortalized. Maybe Alicia would make wine out of us both and set us together on a shelf. I liked that idea.

Well, this might be my fucked up legacy. In a way, I guess I had my brother to thank for it. He’d started this whole mess and he’d brought Alicia into the world.

Well, here’s to you, brother, I thought. Looks like your daughter is gonna be a lot more like her uncle than her father. You couldn’t take care of either of them. I hope you burn in hell for eternity for failing the two most important people in my life.

Chapter 46B

Alana

I stared in horror at what I’d done. There was blood. So much of it. The gun fell to the ground with a clatter and I stumbled backward. Strong arms came around me, but I didn’t feel safe. They held me tightly as if restraining me.

“Alicia,” I choked out.

Vacant eyes stared up at me, so similar to Jake’s. The hole in her neck was like a floodgate. I’d seen throats get cut on TV, but seeing a bullet tear through her in real life was entirely different. I retched and when I tried to curl forward, I found that I was still trapped.

Trapped. I was trapped. I couldn’t move. Couldn’t breathe.

“I’m sorry,” I cried. “I didn’t mean to.”

My voice sounded far away like I was underwater. Then, I was falling. It felt like the moment you thought you were going to fall out of a chair, but I couldn’t set my feet on the ground. I just kept going. I thought of Alice in Wonderland, the way she’d fallen down the rabbit hole. What was at the bottom?

Pain radiated throughout my body. I looked down and saw marble floors that were vaguely familiar. They were so clean- pristine. I flattened my palms on them to push myself up, but then something red dripped onto them. It spread outward, changing the color of the floors all the way throughout the room. I coughed and more of it spewed out of me. When I tried to draw a breath, my throat gurgled.

Drowning. I was drowning in my own blood. I was going to die. My head was already airy and my lungs burned with the need to breathe.

I convulsed and gagged on the blood. My ears were ringing and there was a faint sound in the distance. Beeping? I couldn’t place it. Maybe it was my alarm trying to wake me from this nightmare.

“Alana.”

My eyes opened and I drew in a breath. My throat hurt, but it wasn’t full of blood. Brightness made me squint before I could figure out where I was. The beeping was louder now, coming from my left. Someone’s hand took mine and somehow, I didn’t need to see them to know who it was.

“Sir, we told you to back up.”

“Fuck you.”

I turned to look at Jayce. When he saw me, a smile lit up his face. The way his eyes filled with tears made my chest ache. He wasn’t supposed to cry. He hadn’t even cried at his brother’s funeral.

Jake.

“Oh my god,” I rasped. The words burned my throat and made my breath catch.

“Hey, don’t say anything. You need to heal.”

I furrowed my brow, urging him to explain. A nurse shouldered past him, pushing him to the side. The look on his face was murderous. I offered him a little smile, which eased the way he bristled. He took a single step back and crossed his arms over his chest while they checked me out.

Whatever they told me, I couldn’t pay attention to it. There were two things that occupied my thoughts right now. One was the man a few feet away. His presence was heavy and commanding. Even one of the nurses kept looking over at him as if he was a dog that might bite. He just might.

The second was what I’d learned about him before I got shot. Jake, Ben, Mike, and the others. At the time, I’d been freaking out. Spiraling. Losing my shit. After Alicia interrupted, I knew what I was going to do. I’d forgive him and we’d be happy. I just couldn’t let go of the damn gun. My head wasn’t right. If the gun had been loaded, I might’ve shot her. It triggered a whole new round of fear. For a second, I just couldn’t stop thinking about how dangerous it all was. Any of us could get caught in the consequences that would come from Jayce’s actions.

But when the nurses shuffled out and I looked at him, it was like I fell in love all over again. He seemed a little timid as he moved closer. He paused, then shook his head and put his hand on my waist before he leaned down to kiss me. It was firm but gentle enough that it didn’t hurt me.

“I’m so fucking mad at you,” he murmured. “I shouldn’t have given you that gun. I’m so sorry.”

I offered him a small shake of my head. When I lifted my hand to my throat, he grabbed my fingers and pulled them back.

“You’ll be able to talk, don’t worry. It’s just inflamed and you have stitches in your neck. You can’t move it too much for a bit. You’ll have a cool scar.”

I frowned. I didn’t want a scar, especially one that would be front and center.

He smiled at me. The blue of his eyes was enough to drown me.

“You’re beautiful, Alana. Fucking beautiful. And think about it. Your students might not fuck around as much since you’ll look like a badass.”

My laugh hurt, but it also felt nice. “Alicia,” I rasped.

“She’s fine. It was all a misunderstanding, okay?”

With a sigh, I nodded. I had no idea what would happen moving forward, but everybody was alive. Well, not everybody, but that was over. The only thing we could do was keep going and start a new chapter. All of this darkness could be behind us. No more bad things.

*****

My fingers pressed against my temples firmly. This couldn’t be happening. It wasn’t. Nope. I was gonna go into delusional denial mode. Nope, nope, nope.

“Alana.”

“What the fuck?” I screamed, gesturing toward the stupid fucking fake wall.

“Calm down,” Jayce said with a roll of his eyes.

“Calm down? Really?” I threw my hands in the air. “Okay, I’ll calm down. I’m super fucking calm, Jayce.”

He pursed his lips on a smile, which just pissed me off more. There was a body in our goddamn basement. Again. It had been six months since I got shot just twenty feet away and I thought it was all good. Things were chill. No murders. Well, there was about to be a fucking murder and the bastard was in our basement.

“He’s the guy who shot you,” he said with a shrug.

“Oh, that makes me feel so much better. It’s not as if we could be implicated in this. You have motive!”

He snorted. “They wouldn’t put that together. You know how many people this guy has arrested? He’s killed a few too. There are plenty of people who would be suspects for his disappearance. Us? No. You survived and we both rode off into the sunset together. We have no reason to kill him.”

“Then why are we?”

That menacing smile took over his face. “Because it’s fun?”

“No. Try again.”

“Fine. I want every single one of them to die.”

My fingers went to my temples again. “Explain.”

“He shot you; the others pointed their guns at you. They all contributed to what happened and I think they should pay for it.”

“That’s ridiculous. You hear how ridiculous that is, right?”

Stepping forward, he pushed his fingers through my hair, then tipped my head back. My lips parted because my body was a traitor.

“Who do you think I am, Alana? Do you think what I did to you was out of character? Was it just an outlier? No. I said I’d protect you. I’ll also avenge you. Anyone who has ever made you cry will be put under my knife. They’ll feed our garden and, consequently, us.”

My nose wrinkled. “Does that count as cannibalism?”

His head cocked. “I never thought about it. Let’s say no because that’s gross.”

“Jayce,” I sighed. “I don’t want this in our life.”

“How about one every six months? That’ll give us a steady flow of compost.”

I considered it while I ground my teeth together. “And when you’re done with the officers, it stops, right?” He bit his lip. “Jayce, it stops, right?”

“Guess we’ll see what happens. Alicia wants me to teach her how the vessels work.”

“Absolutely not.”

“Don’t worry. I’m gonna make her wait until she’s sixteen. That’s when I first beat the shit out of someone for you.”

My mouth dropped open. “Who?”

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a pack of gum. There was a smile on his face as he put one in his mouth.

“I hate you.”

He wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me closer. The man in the bed groaned and Jayce’s eyes lit up. I gave him a stern look.

“Remember when he shot you?” he asked.

“I don’t care.”

Jutting his lip out, he moved his t-shirt off of his shoulder, revealing the scar there. “Remember when he shot me?”

That made my blood heat a bit. Not enough to kill a man, but it was a good try. Shaking my head, I headed for the stairs.

“If you ever get caught, I won’t be implicated and I won’t visit you in prison.”

“That’s a lie,” he called.

Maybe it was. All of this was a million shades of fucked up. Seriously, Alicia was ten.  I guess it fit within our absolutely skewed sense of morality. She knew about the people her uncle had killed, including her dad and stepdad. She also carried Jayce’s DNA, so maybe the crazy gene had somehow been activated the way his apparently had at fourteen.

Oh god, I hoped not.

I would not have two killer composters in my life. I would not.

Epilogue

Ferris

I have a stalker.

I don’t think my stalker knows that I know. But I do. I’ve seen them. I don’t know if it’s a man or a woman. They’re always in the shadows. Just a glimpse and they’re gone again.

Then, there are the kisses. Like, Hershey fucking kisses. I find the wrappers in my bushes and shit. Why? No goddamn clue. I don’t eat them and I don’t know anyone who just carries them around in their pockets. That’s freaking weird.

Maybe I should get cameras. It’d be a good idea. But… Nobody ever said I make good decisions. My life is boring and I’ve found myself looking out the window at night, looking for them.

Why would someone stalk me? I was probably the most unremarkable guy in existence. Mostly, I sat in my favorite coffee shop with my laptop. I wrote mystery and thriller novels, which might explain my morbid interest in this person who could very well be dangerous.

So, yeah. I have a stalker. And right now, they were standing under the tree at the edge of my property while I sipped my coffee and acted like I didn’t know they were there.

I sucked in a breath when they took a step forward. They looked smaller than I thought they would, but in their dark clothes it was difficult to make out any specifics. Suddenly, their face lit up. Two green Xs for eyes and a stitched mouth.

Was this an official introduction?

It was very likely this was going to get me killed.

Might make a good book, though.

Table of Contents

Dedication

Author’s Note

Trigger Warnings

Prologue

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Chapter 33

Chapter 34

Chapter 35

Chapter 36

Chapter 37

Chapter 38

Chapter 39

Chapter 40

Chapter 41

Chapter 42

Chapter 43

Chapter 44

Chapter 45

Chapter 46

Epilogue

Chapter 44B

Chapter 45B

Chapter 46B

Epilogue