Table of Contents

- Chapter One

- Chapter Two

- Chapter Three

- Chapter Four

- Chapter Five

- Chapter Six

- Chapter Seven

- Chapter Eight

- Chapter Nine

- Chapter Ten

- Chapter Eleven

- Chapter Twelve

- Chapter Thirteen

- Chapter Fourteen

- Chapter Fifteen

- Chapter Sixteen

- Chapter Seventeen

- Chapter Eighteen

- Chapter Nineteen

- Chapter Twenty

- Chapter Twenty One

- Chapter Twenty Two

- Chapter Twenty Three

- Chapter Twenty Four

- Chapter Twenty Five

- Chapter Twenty Six

- Chapter Twenty Seven

- Chapter Twenty Eight

- Chapter Twenty Nine

- Chapter Thirty

- Chapter Thirty One

- Chapter Thirty Two

- Chapter Thirty Three

- Chapter Thirty Four

- Chapter Thirty Five

- Chapter Thirty Six

- Chapter Thirty Seven

- Chapter Thirty Eight

- Chapter Thirty Nine

- Chapter Forty

Beg for Mercy

Shannon Dermott

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real.  Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission, except in the cast of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews.  The scanning, uploading and distribution of the book via the Internet or via any other means without permission is illegal and punishable by law.  Please purchase only authorized electronic editions, and do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials. Your support for the author’s rights is appreciated.  For information address Wicked Truth Publishing.

Copyright © 2011 Shannon Dermott

All rights reserved.

ISBN: 146370903X

ISBN-13: 978-1463709037

DEDICATION

To my family for giving me the time and space to complete this project.

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

It’s with much gratitude that I thank Portia Johnson for her time and dedication to editing this work of love.

To my ‘first reader’, Danyele Johnson, who braved the first draft and my constant pestering during my brainstorming.

Table of Contents

Chapter One.. 1

Chapter Two.. 5

Chapter Three.. 9

Chapter Four. 13

Chapter Five.. 17

Chapter Six. 22

Chapter Seven.. 24

Chapter Eight. 27

Chapter Nine.. 31

Chapter Ten.. 36

Chapter Eleven.. 40

Chapter Twelve.. 46

Chapter Thirteen.. 49

Chapter Fourteen.. 55

Chapter Fifteen.. 64

Chapter Sixteen.. 73

Chapter Seventeen.. 78

Chapter Eighteen.. 87

Chapter Nineteen.. 96

Chapter Twenty.. 101

Chapter Twenty One.. 106

Chapter Twenty Two.. 110

Chapter Twenty Three.. 116

Chapter Twenty Four. 119

Chapter Twenty Five.. 126

Chapter Twenty Six.. 130

Chapter Twenty Seven.. 137

Chapter Twenty Eight. 144

Chapter Twenty Nine.. 153

Chapter Thirty.. 158

Chapter Thirty One.. 162

Chapter Thirty Two.. 165

Chapter Thirty Three.. 168

Chapter Thirty Four. 173

Chapter Thirty Five.. 180

Chapter Thirty Six.. 186

Chapter Thirty Seven.. 190

Chapter Thirty Eight. 195

Chapter Thirty Nine.. 201

Chapter Forty.. 205

Chapter One

pompous (adj.) – having an excessive sense of self-importance

This had not been a good idea.  I’d known from the beginning nothing good would come from it.  But my best friend, Maggie, had begged and begged.  Her Irish green eyes had been intent on mine with a facial expression that wouldn’t take no for an answer.  Even though my instincts had warned me against it, against coming to this stupid party and possibly risking the very lives of anyone around me, I hadn’t.  Wasn’t this what best friends were for? Maybe not. But, here I sat in a small disorganized circle, loud music pounding against the walls in muted thumps secluded amongst the ‘elite students’ of my school.   I had ignored the very reasons why I shouldn’t be in this room.  This is where I’d made my second mistake of the night.

It was here where I posed the most danger to those around me.  My eyes bounced around to the beat of the music watching everyone laugh and have a good time.  Everyone wanted to be here except me. There was a sudden burst of laughter so boisterous I had to assume there had been a joke I’d missed while caught up in my own self repugnance.

My eyes roved around the room glossing over a huge wooden desk, an oversized brown leather sofa and a bookcase the length of the whole wall. This supposed library was just as big if not bigger than the size of any two rooms in my house. We all sat in the middle on an intricate plush rug with me as the odd person in a chain of paired couples.  Desperately, I needed a way out of this mess before it got out of hand.

I first caught a glance at Maggie with her flaming red hair.  Her eyes twinkled with delight in my direction.  I tried to give her the silent look that would let her know that I wanted to leave as soon as possible.  But she averted my gaze, eyes in favor of the guy at her left, letting me know she wasn’t quite ready to leave.  And who would blame her?  She was sitting next to Brent Mitchell. I had heard his name come from her lips ever since the first day of our freshman year at Everett High. He’d been the one that she’d always pined over even while she dated other guys. So now he had finally invited her out. And for that reason alone I’d tagged along to this party.

Following her gaze, my eyes then roamed over to Brent.  In doing so I was reminded why she was so into him, with his dark tousled hair and brooding good looks.  He wasn’t handsome in the traditional sense but rather a raw attractiveness that fit with his hulking body frame. And not only was he good looking but he was a star football player for our school’s team.  He was a force to be reckoned with on and off the field.  I was truly happy that Brent had finally noticed in her.

I met his brown eyes and caught him smiling with faint amusement. Startled that he’d been looking at me watch him, I adverted my eyes in favor of the guy next to him.

That guy, the man of the hour, was Jay Brisentine.  He was tall, blonde, beautiful and the host of this senior party.  Normally I wouldn’t call a guy beautiful but there just wasn’t a better way to describe him. He too played on our illustrious football team but he was better known as the leader of the Lacrosse team.

His long time girlfriend, Kathy Peterson, was curled next to him with her dark hair, stormy eyes, and equally good genes.  I couldn’t help but wonder what their kids would look like because if any couple would survive high school and get married it would be them.  Their history together started back in middle school.

Continuing my venture around the group, my eyes led me to Amanda Edmond. She was Kathy’s best friend and head cheerleader. Her fit of giggles had cooled as she tossed her bombshell blonde hair over her shoulder, her eyes settling on mine.  Her pouty mouth turned into a frown.  I was puzzled by her look of disapproval because she hadn’t protested against my being here in the first place.

Quickly I looked away from her to give Flynn McCallister, leading bad boy, and Amanda’s boyfriend a glance.  He was the only other junior besides Maggie and me in the room.  I could have known without looking  that his sandy brown hair was swept up in a modern faux Mohawk, which had that slightly messy touch to it that hot guys alone could only perfect. And that his eyes were cold and blue, set on a face that was more than amazing.

Maggie made a noise to get my attention.  My head snapped back to her.  I didn’t quite get the message that I saw on her face. She gestured with her head at an odd angle.  I gave her a quizzical look mouthing What until I followed her eyes down to the center of our circle.  What I saw chilled me to my very core.  I really shouldn’t have come here tonight.

A hand on my arm jolted me.  I turned to meet Flynn’s gaze.  I hated how looking at him always seemed to melt my heart. I knew the effect he had on girls and me in particular.  He was too gorgeous for words and worst yet he knew it.  So did everyone else.   He walked down the halls of school like he owned them and to tell the truth he did.  I hated him because of it.  Girls were aware of his reputation of breaking hearts yet they continued to give into him time and time again.  Being a junior and football team captain he had the respect of the seniors above him as well as the rest of the school.  His abilities to throw the ball and lead the team to state the past two years had sealed his position as the most popular boy in school.

“Flynn, she has a choice you know,” a voice said from somewhere beside me.  I turned my head to see it was Luke, I-couldn’t-remember-his-last-name.  He too, I realized was crush worthy but paled in Flynn’s shadow.  It was hard to imagine that looking at him now.  He was all golden skin and blond curls looking much like a California surfer.   How had I forgotten he was sitting next to me?  Staring at him only made me realize more just how cute he was.

Flynn and Luke were best friends but I had hardly paid any attention to Luke these past two years.  I’d been too busy ignoring Flynn with the best of my abilities to know much about him.  Then it dawned on me. I had forgotten to count Luke.  There weren’t seven of us.  Luke made eight.  Each pair was a couple except Luke and me. Was I being set up with him?

Faintly I remembered hearing that he’d broken up with his girlfriend a few weeks ago.  But at the moment I couldn’t remember the full story.  I was too busy trying to reconcile with why I was here.  Excluding Maggie and I, the room was filled with what most of our classmates dubbed as the wealthiest and most beautiful people of our school, ‘the elite’. No one else in school compared to them.

When I felt Flynn’s hand drop from my arm, I turned my head to look down at fate as it pointed at me.  “Come on, what are you going to do?”

I looked up this time to find it had been Amanda who’d spoken.  Her voice was filled with her facial expression of disapproval but not of the anger I would have expected if I’d been Flynn’s girlfriend.  But that was not how I operated.  In fact, I simply didn’t date.  I couldn’t even if I wanted to.  It wasn’t just a moral decision as most would assume.  I did it because I didn’t want anyone to die.

Angry murmurs of protest at me holding up the game shocked me into action.  I looked down again at the bottle that pointed at me before sneaking another glance at Maggie. Her eyes were wide in frustration.  Clearly she wanted me to make a decision and not make her look bad in front of this group of seniors she desperately wanted to impress.

“Take the shots Mercy or give Flynn a big wet one, make your choice,” a voice said that could have been Jay’s. I wasn’t sure. The room was beginning to blur with the commotion and my emotions over what was to come next.

We of course were playing spin the bottle.  The game wasn’t without consequences.  The surface ones were to spin the bottle and kiss the person the bottle points too.  If you didn’t want to kiss that person, then you drank a shot of Jack.  Added to it, if the person took the kiss the shot poured was added to a pool of shots.  What sat before me now was a bouquet of four shots of Jack Daniels.  If I drank those shots, I wouldn’t just get a buzz.  It would definitely get me drunk.  I couldn’t afford that.  Again it was not only the moral value that stopped me.  It also wasn’t only because my mom would kill me either if she somehow found out.  Truthfully it was because I couldn’t afford to lose control.  Not with death a possible consequence.  Added to that, I really didn’t want to kiss Flynn.

“Don’t make me beg for Mercy,” Flynn said dragging out my name.  The slight slur in his voice led me to believe he was on his way to being drunk if he wasn’t already.  I’d heard this little joke far too many times to find it funny.  In fact it really just ticked me off.  Why my mother decided Mercy was a good choice for a first name so I would suffer my teen years as the butt of  everyone’s jokes disturbed me.  Did she think at all before naming me?  Anger at myself for the situation I was in and anger at the boy whose insufferable conceitedness, who still sent butterflies in my stomach, pissed me off at no end.  So I turned to bare daggers with my eyes back at him.

Looking at him I couldn’t help to see how he personified my word of the day, pompous jerk.  Well, pompous was the word.  I always checked and remembered what my SAT word of the day was.  I tried to use it in at least once in sentence the same day. With the test looming in March, I was trying to expand my vocabulary.

I wouldn’t let this pompous, self centered jerk who thought he was the next thing to God embarrass me.  With my cheeks flushing anyway, I faced him.  A quick peck on the lips couldn’t kill anyone, could it?

His hand came up towards me.  He must have assumed my choice with my movement.  He swiftly cupped the back of my head and pulled me to him.  I didn’t even have time to catch my breath before his mouth was on mine.  It should have been quick.  Nothing could possibly happen if it had been a quick peck.  But he held me there for what seemed like eternity with his mouth parting mine to explore me.  I felt warm, a bit light headed and confused.  After a lingering moment of absent judgment, I pushed him back to separate us.  He rocked back with a burst of laughter which brightened my cheeks more.  I glared at him.  Our lip lock should have him pale and unsteady.  But he seemed fine and a little flushed himself.  I didn’t understand.  How could it be possible?  He should be lying on the ground, face drained of any color.  I shot up to my feet.

“Where’re you going Mercy?  It seems Flynn may have found his match?” Brent said with another howl of laughter.

I brushed my hands down my tee still unsure of what to do.  With everyone looking up at me still giggling and laughing I hastily turned and said, “Maggie, I’ll be back.” I walked across the room and away from the onlookers still in the circle when I heard a slap.

“Shut up Brent,” Kathy said.  She must have leaned over and hit him.  The laughter just intensified.

I was out the door in mere seconds.  Once outside the room, the music pulsed through the empty hallway.  I could see where party goers were milling about.  The make shift dance floor in the middle was still filled with teenage lust.  So I headed the opposite direction.  There were only two more doors before the hallway ended abruptly.  I could only pray one of them was a bathroom.

I lucked out on the second and final door.  I stepped into a small half bath that included nothing more than a toilet and sink.  Moving to the sink I gripped the sides as I leaned in to look into the gold framed mirror.  What I saw in the reflection was a complex mix of younger version of my mother and my father.  Although I looked a lot like my mom I never felt beautiful like she was so effortlessly.  I’d gotten a lot of her facial features but my coloring and hazel eyes I’d seen countless times in a picture my mom kept of my father.  And that should have been my sober reminder of my fate.  I couldn’t understand why I had allowed myself to be batted into kissing Flynn.  If things had gone badly which it should have, how could I have lived with myself?

I pulled back my long wavy brown hair as I bent forward turning on the faucet with my free hand.  I splashed water on my face remembering Paul and what’d happened that awful day.

Chapter Two

abnegation (n.) - denial of comfort to oneself

It was in my freshman year when I started hanging out with Paul Bowman.  He was a year ahead of me and the cutest nerdy boy I’d ever met.  He was tall and awkward with an amazing smile.  He had a thick short mop of wavy black hair that had grown just beyond the baseball cap he liked to wear.  We were in the same Honors Geometry class back then.

We’d started out as study buddies, so I’d thought.  It easily progressed to hanging out at school events.  When he’d held my hand the first time, I’d been over the moon.  This had been all new for me.  He seemed just as nervous as I was.

One day I needed to stay after school to meet with a teacher.  Afraid I was going to miss the bus, he’d offered me a ride home.  Maggie with her strong personality and quick advice insisted that I agree.  She’d already had her first kiss and felt sure since my mom was working late that day, it could be the day for mine.  I wasn’t really an overly shy person, but who wouldn’t be nervous their first time alone with a boy she liked.

Paul had driven his mom’s old brown Buick back then.  When he pulled it to a stop at in front of my house I made the move Maggie coached me on.  It wasn’t much but she told me it would signal to him that I might be ready for the next step.  So I turned to him.  “Want to come in?” I invited with a smile.

He looked at me for a second in surprise with his gray eyes flicked with hints of silver before he nodded and said,   “Sure.”  His tone hadn’t been gleeful but rather filled with minor shock.

To say I was anxious was an understatement.  My hand literally shook when I twisted my keys in the door.  I had to psych myself out of looking like a total freak calming myself down.  This is no big deal Mercy I said to myself.  Taking several steps inside to my left and down a step, I dropped my bag on the coffee table in the living room.  When I turned to ask him if he wanted a drink I nearly barreled into him.  He’d been on my heels following me close.  I looked up at him and met his eyes.  “Uh, you want something to drink?” I mused.

His smile was radiant.  “Coke,” he said.  Before I turned to go to the kitchen, I was sure he’d flushed a bit.

“Ok,” I said, shimming around him to go to the kitchen located in back of my house.  Quickly grabbing two Cokes from the fridge, I headed back.  I admit I wasn’t sure of what to expect next.  He was sitting on the sunny yellow sofa my mom so loved when I came back into the living room.  The flower decorated pillows were at his back.  I didn’t know if I should sit next to him or on the flower printed chair across from it.  I didn’t want to send the wrong signals.

Making my decision easy he scooted over so I wouldn’t have to go by him and evade the table in front of him.  So I sat next to him.  Kicking myself I realized I should have really talked more to Maggie about this before I left her at school.  This was all so new to me.

Handing him his Coke, I cracked open mine.  I took a swallow before setting mine down on the table.  It felt awkward now.  I didn’t know what to say and well he hadn’t struck up a conversation either.  I looked to the table and noticed he hadn’t opened his Coke.  He’d just sat it on the table.  So I angled my head to look at him thinking of conversation to make.

“When are baseball tryouts?” I asked.  I had this unbearable need to break the silence.

“Next month?” he said eagerly. He must have been searching for a topic of conversation as well. “Are you going out for softball or track?”

“Softball probably,” I answered.  I’d played sports every year at school.  I was surprised he noticed enough to ask.

“Cool,” he said shaking his head and looking away from me.

“My mom’s not going to be home for a while,” I said before thinking.  I quickly cursed myself and closed my eyes at the blunder I made.  I didn’t want him thinking this was an open invitation to anything.  But well, I did want to kiss him.

His head snapped back to me although he was still leaning forward with his arms on his knees.  I glanced away from his stare because I was totally embarrassed by my words. Their meaning to him was apparent by the look on his face.  I felt the couch shift with his movement.

When I turned back to look at him again his lips met mine.  I had no time to prepare.  The rush of heat was instant.  I closed my eyes like they did in the movies to take in the sensations.  It felt magnetic as if we couldn’t be parted.  Waves of something I can’t describe rolled over and into me.  I would understand later just what that sensation was.

I thought I died and gone to heaven until the front door opened and my mom walked in.  I jerked back, horrified, staring at my mother in the doorway when Paul’s head hit my lap.  Dumbstruck, I pushed him away urgently, never looking from my mother’s furious eyes.  It was too late to warn him of the impending danger when he simply rolled off my lap and thudded on the floor.

“Paul,” I gasped when I saw him unmoving on the floor.  Heart pounding, I fell on my knees next to him ready to do CPR. Looking at him however, I couldn’t remember the life saving technique I’d just learned last week in heath.  My hands were shaking when I leaned down over him to check if he was breathing.  Thankfully my mom moved into action dropping the grocery bags with a crash on the floor.

“Don’t Mercy, move away and don’t touch him?” she rambled on as I felt for a pulse ready to give him mouth to mouth.

She shoved me lightly away and tilted her ear to his mouth and listened.  She then placed her hands on his throat and counted silently in her head.  My mom was an RN so I trusted she knew what to do.  I felt hot tears stream down my cheeks while I waited.

“Should I call 911?” I asked breaking her concentration.

Shaking her head and she continued to count.  Finally she turned back to me and said, “He’ll be fine.  Help me move him.”  She shoved the coffee table toward the flower chair and we positioned him in the spot it had been.  The two Cokes spilled to the carpet when the tabled moved.  My opened can was the one to cause damage to the neutral colored carpet while it fell.  Neither of us paid that much attention.

“Mom, what’s wrong with him. Should we call a doctor or his parents?”  I asked.

She patted the sofa before she got up and sat on it herself.  I looked at her stunned.  Paul lay on the ground and even though she was an RN he wasn’t moving.  Now wasn’t the time for a chat.

“Mom, we can’t just leave him like this,” I pleaded.

She continued to pat the seat next to her without saying anything but giving me a look that said not to challenge her on this. Finally, I obeyed but not without throwing another worried look at Paul who looked like he was sleeping if not anything else.

She faced me with her somber blue eyes and her easygoing close-cut blond hair spiky from her recent hand rubbing through it. I knew there was trouble coming in the words that would follow her mouth parting.  “Mercy, there is something you should know.”

I looked in befuddlement.   What does this have to do with anything? Paul needed help I thought, looking helplessly at him.

She took my hands and looked down on them before meeting my eyes again.  “I thought I had more time before I’d have to tell you this.”

“What?” I asked still confused as why this was the right time for this.

She looked at Paul who lay still on the ground.  “Apparently I waited too long,” she said with her hands folded creating a triangle shape under her chin.

“Mom,” I said wanting to get Paul to the hospital seeing as he was still so still.

She looked at me for another long moment then said three words I will never forget, even though I didn’t know or understand their meaning at first. “You are succubus,” she said on a heavy sigh. “And this is what will happen to any boy you kiss.”

I frowned. “Is that a slang term for slut or something?  If so I’ve never kissed a boy until today,” I said not understanding the meaning of the word succubus.  I should have been mortified at my mother walking in unexpectantly on my first kiss.  I was at first, but now I was on the defensive.

“No and I know that you haven’t kissed a boy before.  That is something that wouldn’t have gone unnoticed,” she said tersely.

My eyes glazed over as she began to explain that I was half human, half succubus.  In a gist it meant I stole the life force of any human being I kissed.  It got weirder when she explained the birds and bees to me and how sex was also deadly, at least for me.  As a teenager with dreams of boys, prom and such I didn’t think my life could go on.  Abnegation was my only option now.  There would be no boy who would date me and be content forever to only hold my hand.  My mom did explain that later in life I would be able to contain the “demon” within me.  She said I would be able to have normal relationships in the future.  But now while my hormones raged on I wouldn’t be able to control it.  Thus if I didn’t abstain from everything I could kill someone unwittingly as I almost did with Paul.

I was so embroiled by what she was telling me, I didn’t notice and neither did she that Paul had regained consciousness.  His eyes were wide open and it was clear he’d heard enough of our conversation to know just what I was.

She’d sworn him to secrecy and shooed him off as my life as I knew it ended.  I thought that my life would be ruined more the next day by his words if he chose to tell or even give any version of the day’s events.  But my worry for the next day of school proved fruitless because Paul proved himself loyal to his word.  More than that, he didn’t ignore me either.  We remained friends, even best friends as time passed.  He knew more about me than I could share with Maggie.

The memory faded.  Back in the bathroom, I wished he hadn’t worked tonight so he could have come.  Paul had changed in these last few years from cute nerd to cool nerd.  He was really good at baseball and was considered among the elite seniors in school.  If he’d been here, he would have gotten me out of the mess somehow.

Thinking to my second kiss ever, I pondered why nothing happened to Flynn.  I hadn’t kissed anyone out of fear since Paul. Maybe my mother had lied to me so I wouldn’t date.  Maybe it was some extreme no teen sex talk.  Looking at myself in the mirror again I gathered tissue to pat my face dry.  I was unconcerned with the consequences of the wetness because I hadn’t been wearing much in the way of makeup except a little lip gloss today.  I pulled the tube out of my pocket.  I looked at it a second.

Maybe the kiss had been too quick or I’d been to nervous and somehow that protected Flynn.  I applied my lip gloss and headed out the door.   On the other side, Luke stood with his hand mid air apparently ready to knock on the door.

“Hey,” he said. “I just came to see if you were alright.”

I had to look up to see into his marine blue eyes.  They seemed so sincere. He was surely cute but totally off limits to me.  I looked away from his face staring into his chest.  I’d known that the guys in the room were tall but being so close to Luke let me know just how tall he was.  Clearly he was over six feet because I stood five feet six inches.

“Yeah,” I said. “I’m fine.”

“The guys can be jerks at times, but they don’t mean anything by it.”

I looked back up at him and gave him a tentative smile.  I was surprised by his honest intention to make me feel better.  I thought Maggie would have followed me to the bathroom but instead here was Luke looking at me with eyes that spoke volumes.  I stepped back creating distance between us thinking how great it could be if I could actually have a boyfriend without killing him.

Luke didn’t move and I was embarrassed.  I didn’t want to hurt his feelings.  So against my better judgment for the third time tonight I took a step back in his direction.

“Are you coming back in?” he asked.

I couldn’t leave Maggie as much as I wanted to.  The worst was over, right?  “Yes, I guess I’m in total abnegation.  Lead the way,” I said holding out my hand in a gesture mimicking my words.

He smiled and didn’t ask the mean of my word of the day before turning and leading me back into the private room.  Points for him, I thought.  I’d only just sat back down when the door open and Paul peaked in.  I had to contain myself from jumping to cross over to him at the sight.  I needed him now more than ever.  But when he walked in followed by his new girlfriend, Amber, my heart was crushed.  He still looked like the same boy I kissed two years ago only he wasn’t as gangly.  He’d grown into his tall frame an even added muscle definition to his physique. The only difference was tonight he didn’t sport his usual baseball cap.

I relished our friendship more than he could ever possibly imagine.  But secretly I wished for more.  Where Flynn spawned a quick burn of lust with his gorgeousness, Paul inspired a longing for something more.  I’d long ago considered Paul my soul mate even if he didn’t know it.  He understood me and he accepted all of me just the way I was.  In my heart I longed not be a half weird demon and just a girl.

Paul and I had liked each other and who knew what could have been if I hadn’t almost killed him.  But that was one secret I kept from him and Maggie alike.  She would never understand why it couldn’t be between the two of us unless my mom would let me let her in on our secret.  After tonight I would seriously consider telling her despite my mother because I couldn’t do this again.

I looked up into Paul’s eyes and he gave me a quick smile before greeting his other friends.  What would come next could possibly cause me nightmares.

Chapter Three

calumny (n.) an attempt to spoil someone else’s reputation by spreading lies

“You’re just in time,” Flynn announced to Paul.  “Mercy here was about to take her turn in a friendly game of truth and dare.”

Stunned I turned from Paul’s warm eyes to what had to be the devilish eyes of Flynn.  I just couldn’t wrap my mind around why he seemed to be picking on me tonight.

Catching the anger I expressed with my own eyes, he smiled back at me and said slyly, “You didn’t think your escape would get you off that easy,” Flynn said.

Tongue in cheek, I bit it to choke off the slew of expletives I wanted to spew.  Although the verbal barge would sooth my anger it would do no more than fuel whatever Flynn was trying to insight in me.

“So what will it be,” he said smoothly. “Truth or Dare?”

Everyone who’s played this game knows that either choice is a trap.  If you say truth, you will be asked a completely embarrassing question that can have no good answer.  The choice of a dare was no better as it would set you up to do something equally embarrassing.  If I hadn’t wanted to back down from the challenge in Flynn’s eyes, I would have turned to give Maggie a view of my anger s.

With impenetrable stare and equally daring challenge I said sternly, “Truth.”  It was the lesser of the evils.

Flynn narrowed his eyes as if he hoped I’d answered dare.  I waited on his question wondering what he could possibly ask me that would embarrass me knowing that had been his plan all along.  There could be no other reason.  So focusing in on plausible questions I couldn’t really think of any.  I wasn’t dating anyone and had no crushes in this room except of course, Paul.  The thought made my stomach sink.  If he asked me about Paul, even if I lied the rumor mill would spread.

A grin erupted on Flynn’s face as if he’d come up with the wickedest question to ask.   “Are you a virgin?” he announced.

Astounded, I could have melted into the floor.  I should have guessed.  This was the worst possible question.  I didn’t understand where Flynn’s calumny rooted from.  The Paul question I could have lied and even with speculation, that rumor would die soon. Paul and I could survive scrutiny.  But this question had no good answer.  I repeat none.  I was in a room full of seniors and the most popular ones at that.  If I said I was a virgin, I look like a total dweeb, social misfit and certainly not worthy of sitting in this room.  Name calling would be poignant and brutal.  My sexuality would be put into question.  I certainly didn’t measure up in the beauty scale with this bunch.  I should be out in with the other seniors dancing with the rhythmic music.  I didn’t belong here.  I was just an average girl who couldn’t date.

But if I said I wasn’t, well of course I’d be admitting to being a slut because nothing’s changed when it came to girls and boys.  Girls who do are loose and slutty where as boys who do are studs; so unfair all of it was.

“Well,” I heard a female voice ask in the background.  I didn’t turn to look.  I didn’t want to see anyone’s face.  But I was certain it was Amanda because of the snarky tone and smirk to the question.

My eyes hardened on Flynn.  I wanted him to see my total distain and contempt for him.  I should have stood and walked out without answering the question.  That would have been the wise choice.  It would have been better not to give into him.

Instead, I answered truthfully. “Yes,” and I stood with all the dignity I could muster and this time walked to the door without any further words.  Stepping out of the room, I quietly closed the door behind me even though my temper wanted to slam it.  It didn’t matter, I tried to tell myself. I didn’t stop my forward progress and never did I glance back at Maggie on my way out of the room.  I was furious.  Not really at her, but at me for coming in the first place.  And of course my resentment was directed at Flynn, the giant ass.

When I heard the door open again behind me, I didn’t turn around.  I assumed Paul or Maggie had come after me.  I felt the tug on my shoulder from behind, I whirled around ready to spout my anger.  Instead of Paul or Maggie standing before me, it was Luke.

“Hey,” he said looking into my angry eyes. It was as if he could read me.  Then he said, “I told Maggie and Paul I’d check on you. I was odd man out anyway with you gone.”  Funny, I’d thought I’d had been the odd man out as well.

He was so close I could hear him over the blasting music.  His blue eyes weren’t cold like Flynn’s. They were warm like the ocean surrounding a tropical island.  Warm waves of comfort seem to pour off of him and into me.  I felt the heat of anger course out of me slowly replaced by calm.

“Thanks,” I said, taking a deep breath.  It wasn’t his fault I was here.  I wouldn’t take my fury out on him.  “I’ll be fine. You can go back to your friends,” I added, half turning.

He kept his eyes steady on me. “You know he was just joking. He’s really not a bad guy,” he said, trying to smooth things over.

I let out a choked laugh. “Yeah, right.  He’s got total calumny against me.”

He didn’t answer. But with a serious face he asked, “You want to dance?”

He was so cute and it was terribly sweet for him to come and check on me not once but twice tonight.  He didn’t flitch at either of my SAT words, so another point for him.  What was the worst that could happen? “Sure,” I said with a smile.

He took my hand and twirled me around taking the lead.  I followed him to the middle of the living room where the furniture was pushed off to the walls leaving the space open for a make shift dance floor.  He didn’t stop on the outskirts of the swaying bodies.  He pulled me into the throngs of the middle encapsulated by the activity.  We began to dance.  I wasn’t self-conscious dancing with him like I thought I might be.  We were squished between in the middle of everyone.   No one was even watching me as drinks were passed to open hands.  I wasn’t a bad dancer.  In fact I liked dancing a lot.  Maybe it was all the dance classes my mother subjected me to as a child.

Luke took a long pull on what surely was a beer bottle that was handed to him.  He then offered it to me.  I shook my head no in favor speaking because I knew I couldn’t be heard over the head banging music.  He shrugged and continued to dance with the bottle in his hands.  He wasn’t a bad dancer either.  Most guys if not groping you stood and just bobbed their heads like they were way too cool.

The music changed several times before I felt sweat begin to form on my back.  I used my hands to gesture that I was hot and pointed in the direction to the right side of us to let him know I was going to take a break.  He nodded and began to follow me.  His hand met the small of my back guiding me through the crowd.  I didn’t feel uncomfortable from his touch.  He hadn’t groped me on the dance floor so I felt at ease with him.  He’d actually been a perfect gentleman. His fingers were light and not pushy so I barely noticed them there after a few moments.

Once the dancers parted, we walked towards the kitchen to get away from the masses. I was about to pass what surely was Maggie.  Although red locks covered her face which was plastered to Brent but her hair color was too distinctive not to be her.  There were other redheads in school but the others hair color was much more muted.  Not to mention the clothes she wore were the ones I had helped her pick out earlier on today at her house.

But what I saw had me stop when I noticed what she was doing. I admit I gaped. Maggie O’Bannon, the girl I have known forever since we both played candy canes in our kindergarten holiday play was sitting on Brent’s lap and kissing like she was the succubus.  But before I was able to move to peel them away from each other, Luke tugged at my hand.  He gently dragged me forward through a door that led into the kitchen.  As the door closed behind us I was grateful the music was a bit more muted in here.

I wanted to go back and stop my friend from being  stupid with a senior boy who hung out with the likes of Flynn.  It appeared that the truth and dare game had broken up sometime after my departure.  I would have expected Maggie or Paul to check on me.  Apparently Brent held Maggie’s interest more than I.  Still I was her best friend and needed to give her a good dose of reality.  But Luke hadn’t let go of my hand.  His grip was light but secure.  Before I could speak, Luke turned to the refrigerator and pulled out a green bottle and placed it in my free hand.

I shook my head and said, “I don’t drink.”

He met my gaze before looking down at the bottle.  I followed his eyes and saw it was a bottle of Sprite.  I looked back up at him as he raised his eyebrows and said, “I know.”

I closed my lips and grinned at him. “Thanks,” I said wanting to put my foot in my mouth.  He too had a bottle in his hand but I didn’t ask what it was because my mouth was already full with my feet.

Still holding my hand, he led me out the back door to an expansive deck and I let him.  Maggie was a big girl, I reminded myself.  We sat in the cool night air gazing at the stars on the steps from the deck that lead to down to the gardens that made up Jay’s backyard.  He’d let go of my hand so I fisted it in my lap not sure what to do with it now.

When I thought about Maggie again and debated on whether or not I should go stop her from doing anything reckless, Luke looked at me.

“People in life have to make choices,” he said surely reading my mind.  “And you shouldn’t be ashamed yours. I think being a virgin is admirable.”

I was stunned into silence for the fourth time tonight but for far different reasons.  My face flushed while I looked at him.  He took another long drink from the brown bottle.  His words seemed a bit old for his teenage years and way to wise for the company he kept.  I didn’t know how to answer nor did I really want to. I hadn’t even talked about my virginity with Maggie lately much less with a guy I barely knew before today.  But there was something in his eyes made me want to.

Feeling at ease all of a sudden, I responded in kind.  “Purity isn’t always a choice but rather a life style.” I said half joking. I wanted to say more to open up about who I was, but I didn’t know him at all.  In a weird way I felt safe with him.  But I was sworn to silence and I couldn’t even tell Maggie, my very best friend.  Had she known she wouldn’t have dragged me here tonight, I thought.  Funny enough I needed to unload.  Paul had his girlfriend now and we didn’t talk as much between school, homework, his job and now his relationship.  So I wondered what I could say without revealing anything that would sound crazy to the average person.  He wouldn’t have believed me anyway.

“Still admirable,” he said with the bottle to his lips.  After another pull that surely finished the contents inside he took my hand again and said, “I like you Mercy.”

I turned to him to see his eyes and I was surprised by his admission.  It felt like déjà vu all over again.  He face was leaning in to kiss me.  I turned just enough in time for his lips to brush the side of my mouth when a loud crash resounded through the silent air.  We were up on our feet heading back inside the house before either one of us could register the moment.

Chapter Four

licentious (adj.) displaying a lack of moral or legal restraints

Entering the massive family room through the kitchen door again people stood around rumbling.  The music was no longer an issue and the lights were no longer dim but blaring in brightness.  I squinted around and found Maggie sitting alone where she’d previously been lip-locked with Brent.

I walked a few steps and put my hand on her shoulder as she stood shell shocked.  “Where’s Brent?” was my first question.  I couldn’t believe he’d left her standing alone staring into space.

She looked up at me and blinked a few times as if she just recognized me.  She pointed then said, “He’s outside with Flynn.”

I took her hand and said, “What happened?”

She seemed to snap back together again. “Flynn got in a fight with,” she stammered snapping her fingers as if she was trying to remember. “Ah, I can’t remember his name.”

I felt hands on my shoulders and turned slightly as Luke bent down and whispered in my ear, “I’ll be right back.” I followed his stride to the front door where Maggie had pointed moments ago.

“What were they fighting about?” I asked curious as to what sparked it.

She looked into my eyes. “I don’t know I was really occupied, but I think I heard something about a hand on Amanda’s ass.  But I doubt anyone would be crazy to do so.”

“Why’d Brent leave you?”

“Someone had to pry Flynn off the poor boy.”  I should have felt sympathy for Amanda or the poor boy who gotten beaten up from the sounds of it.  Instead I was ready to leave.  Thinking back to that almost kiss I half wished he had kiss me.  This night was getting to me and I just needed to get home.

“Maggs, can we go now?”  I asked.  Hoping she would hear the pleading in my voice.

“Eme,” Maggie said.  She’d shorten my name to one letter long ago. “Can’t we stay just a bit longer?  It seems Luke is keeping you company,” she said with a wink.

I didn’t appreciate the suggestion. Breathing I calmed myself remembering that she had no idea why I couldn’t have a boyfriend. “You know I would stay if nothing for the fact you’re my very best friend in the whole world, but frankly I think I’ve done my fair share tonight.  Anyway it looks as though the party’s over.”

She looked up and over my shoulder and I followed her gaze.

“I can take you home,” Luke said.  Now when did he get back?  I hadn’t heard his approach.

“Thanks, but Maggs and I came together and I can’t leave her alone.” I said while turning to give Maggie a look that dared her to disagree with my statement.

She through some misguided since of friendship thought otherwise.  “I’m going to hang out a while and wait on Brent.  I promised him a ride home since he rode with someone else.” She said with a wink.  I silently cursed her.  Brent had a car but I hadn’t noticed his car when we’d come.  His black Camero with flames painted down the top was no car you could miss.

My eyes closed to slits as I continued to look at her not believing she would do this to me. She mouthed, He likes you. Go for it.  I moved my head slightly from left to right before Luke pivoted in front of me to look me in the eye.  I changed my expression quickly not wanting him to see how much I didn’t want to be alone with him.  It wasn’t because I didn’t like him or appreciate what a nice guy he so far turned out to be.  I simply didn’t want to have to turn him down.

“I promise I won’t bite.  Scout’s honor,” he said holding up his hand in the pledge.

I shifted a little to the left to see Maggie behind him. She gestured with a finger pointing for me to go then held up the universal sign to signal me she’d call me later.  Oh, I couldn’t wait for her to call.  My useless best friend threw me under the bus tonight and she was going to pay when she called.

“Fine,” I said with a tilt to my head and a smile to Luke.  He took my hand again and I started to think he was a little too touchy-feely. As we made our way through the crowd still stunned by the fight, I made a plan.  I hadn’t seen Paul yet.  Maybe he was outside.  I would simply tell Luke, Paul could take me home.  I would do that while giving Paul the look and he would understand.  I hated to break his evening with Amber, but life and death was far more important.  So with a new plan, I relaxed feeling suddenly better.

Stepping out the front door I was immediately chilled.  I felt the goose bumps on my skin.  When Luke and I had been over on the back porch earlier, the night air hadn’t felt so cold.  We’d been virtually alone then.  Here, the front lawn was littered with people.  I saw Brent standing in front of Flynn making wild gestures with his arms.  He was too far away for me to hear.  I also saw Jay, Kathy, and Amanda nearby watching the conversation but not participating in it.  I turned to my right looking for Paul feeling my last chance for escape drifting away.

To my disappointment I saw Paul several yards away kneeling next to Flynn’s second victim of the night; I being the first.  I recognized the guy but like Maggie I couldn’t remember his name.  The guy was sprawled out on the ground supported by his elbow holding his jaw.  I also think I saw blood.  Paul’s back was too me so I had no chance.  If I claimed I needed to talk to Paul for a second only come back to announce he would take me home, it would be blatantly obvious what our talk was about.  Luke had been really great to me tonight.  He hadn’t been overt with any of his actions.  I could let him take me home and if he tried to kiss me I’d tell him I didn’t know him very well.  It could work.

He led me down the street to his car which of course as his status of elite was a white BMW. He unlocked the car door with a chirp from his remote.

“You’re shaking. Are you cold?” he asked.  I’d left my jacket in Maggie’s car figuring I wouldn’t need it inside Jay’s house.  So I only wore the thin black tee and skinny jeans.  My arms being exposed to the fall air were definitely freezing.

I nodded.  He opened the back door and pulled out his orange and white letterman’s jacket and held it out to me.  I held a hand up and shook my head as I spoke.  “It’s ok. I’ll be home soon.”

He held it forward thrusting it on me.  “I’m not going to watch you shiver,” he said with determination.

Not wanting to argue because truly I was cold, I shifted so he helped me in it.  I knew without seeing his surname, Bishop which popped in my head, was arched on the back as it did with all letterman jackets at our school. His achievements of sportsmanship displayed in patches on the arms of the jacket.  He opened the passenger door as I glided into the supple leather of the fully loaded interior.  The cold air was immediately shut out.   Before he closed the door I heard footfalls behind us.  I turned in time to see Flynn and Amanda jogging up.  Then I heard Luke say What’s up right before the door closed.

A few minutes more and the back door opened and Amanda got in.  I turned to catch her eye.  She didn’t speak to me so I turned back around.   God she was rude.  I thought about the jacket and what it meant when a girl was seen wearing one.  It meant that girl and guy were an item.  If I recalled correctly, she was friends with his recent ex-girlfriend.  But before I could ponder anymore, I heard more muffled words I couldn’t make out while Luke and Flynn stood outside on the driver’s side speaking.  When Flynn slid behind the driver’s seat, I’d guessed what they had been discussing.  I shook my head in disgust when Flynn winked at me. I turned back at Luke who sat in the back of his own car and he shrugged.

“Friend’s don’t let friends drive drunk.” Flynn announced. “So where do live, Mercy?”

I rolled my eyes and rattled off my address as I held my forehead wondering if the night could possible get any worse.  I hadn’t thought about Luke drinking because he hadn’t acted drunk.  That could have been my perfect excuse to get out of riding with him home.  That ship had sailed, so in a way I appreciated Flynn for stepping in.  Thinking more from what I’d heard, Flynn had wrecked two cars in a short time frame.  One was totaled this school year, which is why he wasn’t driving his own car tonight.  His was in the shop.  So my confidence in his driving me home suddenly wasn’t looking much better.  I should jump out and run for it.  My excuse would be my mad dash.  But before I could put that plan into action we were already headed down the road.

I closed my eyes silently praying I would make it home in one piece.  I wasn’t overly religious or maybe even slightly religious, but praying couldn’t hurt.  Flynn turned on the satellite radio to a station that was playing metal.  I was glad I didn’t have a headache.

Only a few moments more the car came to a stop.  I thought maybe Flynn was going to turn around because we really hadn’t gone further than around the corner.

“Just a minute,” Flynn said to no one in particular.  He got out of the car and seconds later opened the back door for Amanda.  I looked up to see we were in front of a house which must have belonged to her.  I wondered why he hadn’t walked her home.

“Sorry, about this Mercy,” Luke said jolting me from my inward thoughts.

I turned back with a half smile. “It’s ok.”

He breathed deep, “I didn’t think about the few beers I had otherwise I wouldn’t have offered you a ride. I don’t think I’m drunk but I wouldn’t want to risk your safety.”

My phone vibrated and I said, “No worries” as I checked the screen.

The text was from Maggie.  It read Call me on the display.  I put it back in my pocket just as Flynn got back in the car.

We drove off again and I tried concentrated on the musical lyrics of the screaming vocalist over the roar of guitar and not the road.  I didn’t want be scared enough that I would feel compelled to complain to Flynn about his driving.  I didn’t want to speak to him at all.  I lived about twenty minutes away and it couldn’t come soon enough.  I started thinking about what I was going to say to my traitorous best friend.

When only ten minutes elapsed and we’d come to a stop again, I looked up.  A massive brick house the warm color of autumn with many windows in front of me was most certainly not mine.  I wondered if it was Flynn’s as he was considered rich as well.  But that didn’t make sense because then Luke would have to drive me home.

“Mercy, can I borrow your phone?” Luke said from the back.  I didn’t think.  Pulling it out of my pocket again, I just handed him my phone without comment.

He punched in a few buttons and a jingle of a song came from behind me.   If he had his phone why had he needed mine?

On cue he looked up at me after he’d hit ignore on his own phone holding mine out to me.  I took it and he said, “Are you going right to bed when you get home?”

“No,” I said honestly as I planned to ream out Maggie.

“Ok, I’ll call you later,” he said simply.  It dawned on me why he’d asked for my phone. “You have my number now as well,” he said smiling and got out the car.

To Flynn he said, “Don’t wreck my car and have it to me in the morning. I have something to do.”  And with that he closed the door and headed up his walk.

I couldn’t believe it.  He’d just given his car to Flynn, the school’s worst driver, like that.  It must be nice to be rich.  I would never let Flynn drive my car if I had one.

When Flynn pulled off, I couldn’t ignore that I was alone with the hottest guy in school.  This would be a momentous day for your average teenage girl.  Even thought I was average, I wasn’t enjoying this moment at all.  This was not my choice.  Furthermore, Flynn was a gigantic ass on top of being way hot.  And after tonight the scales of hotness in my eyes lost to the fact he was a royal jerk.

I was grateful for the silent ride home save for the tunes that crooned out of the superb sound system.  If he’d engaged me with conversation I might have let him have it with all the SAT words I’d learned over the last few months that applied to him.  Then I would have added a few choice curse words in case he wasn’t clear with my other deadlier ones.  With that he might have dropped me off on the side of the road to walk home with no Luke to save me.  Flynn wasn’t known for his kindness especially when it came to girls; which is why it was so unfathomable that he could continue to pull any girl he wanted.

Instead I opted to close my eyes and in the late hour had almost drifted to sleep.   My eyes flew open when the car came to a stop.  Then with a turn of the keys, the car fell completely silent.

I looked up and saw my house.  It was dark so my mom wasn’t home.  She was working the third shift tonight and wouldn’t be home until morning.  It didn’t matter because I had no formal curfew.  I never went anywhere these days except over to Maggie’s and occasionally hanging out with Paul.  So my mom hadn’t set a formal time for me to be home and frankly I didn’t plan on doing anything that would make her think of doing so.  Having no curfew meant when the time arose, I could use that for my advantage.  Not that in my circumstances that time would ever come.  But hey a girl could dream.

It suddenly hit me that the GPS had not directed us to my house nor had Flynn ask me for directions.  But realization dawned when I remembered that I think last year he dated a girl who lived in my subdivision.

I reached for the door handle as I planned for a quick exit and a half hearted thank you because it was the only polite thing to do when Flynn reached for my arm again stopping me. “We need to talk.”

Slowly I turned and looked at his hand until he released me before I met his eyes with a chilly stare.  “I have nothing to say to you,” I said restraining myself from a barge of ugly words.

“Hear me out,” he pleaded.

“You are a pompous licentious asshole, and there is nothing I need to hear from you but thank you for the ride,” I said closing the car door maybe a little too hard on my exit.  I headed the short distance to my front door.

He must have turned the car back on because he rolled the window down.  I heard him say, “What the hell is licentious?”

I said just loud enough as I fumbled with my keys. “Look it up,” I rumbled out.  Cursing the door, my hand shook from anger.  When I stepped inside, I closed the door never looking back.  Only after I heard the car pull away did I wonder what in the name of hell could he have wanted to say to me.

Chapter Five

equanimity (n.) mental or emotional stability or composure, especially under tension or strain

I woke up feeling bad about the conversation I had with Maggie.  She’d called elated to find out what happened with me and Luke.  Instead I’d given her grief for bring me to a party where I’d been humiliated not once but twice by Flynn.  Then to top it off, she’d inadvertently sent me home with him alone as well.  I’d given her hell.  In the end when she’d finally understood, she’d apologized only for me to feel guilty for making her feel so bad.  So I’d ended up apologizing too.  She’d meant well, it just ended badly.

Lying cross-legged with hands covering my eyes I’d replayed my conversations with Luke in my head trying to convince myself I wasn’t waiting for his call.  That call had never come.  I’d checked my cell phone first thing.  It had fallen from my hand onto the bed at some point after I’d fallen asleep.

I heard my mother in the kitchen making what I assume was bad coffee from the smell that wafted in under the gap of my closed bedroom door.  I wasn’t in the mood for conversation yet so I stayed in bed enjoying a lazy Saturday morning.

My eyes scanned my room and fell on the chair where the orange and white letterman’s jacket lay neatly across the back of it.  That jacket spelled trouble more than the name Bishop that was arched on the back.  I thought of the mysterious Luke.  His father was a well known television evangelist with extreme numbers of followers.  I remembered his father as a child when he was the pastor of the church here in town before he divorced Luke’s mother and married a much younger woman to pursue his holy television career.  Despite his father’s obvious short comings, he’d taken care of Luke and his mother as they lived very well.  With such a grandiose father, I hadn’t expected the quiet nature of the son.

Before I finally left my room to hunt for breakfast, I’d determined it was all for the best that Luke hadn’t called.  Maybe he had been inebriated after all. Although I was sure he still had a quiet personality, maybe he’d just been nice and nothing more.  That should have been a sigh of relief but it wasn’t.

With chores and homework done, I ended up back in my bedroom early afternoon looking out at the bright clear day needing to get out of the house and out of my head.  I picked up my phone to call Maggie to see if she wanted to go to the mall or something and noticed I had a text message.  I was so sure it was from Maggie, I actually sat on my bed when I saw it was from Luke.  Apparently based on his text he’d fallen asleep last night and didn’t get to call but hoped I’d come to the football game tonight then to the Dewey’s afterwards.

Dewey pond was a very accurate description of the small body of water in our town used for recreations and the annual fireworks display.  It wasn’t big enough to boat on, although some had in the past attempted small row boats.  But it wasn’t a common site.  Mostly, at least for my classmates, they hung out there in absence of anything better to do.

Torn, I wasn’t sure what to do.  The pragmatic side of me knew I should instantly send a text message back declining his invitation.  But the human girl in me roared to life as if her existence depended on it.  That side of me longed for this and had waited far too long.  My lists of reasons for just going were overwhelming that I found myself calling Maggie.

“I told you Eme, he is so into you.  And he is really cute.  He’s got that surfer thing going.  You have to go.  I’m going.  Brent and I discussed this last night.”

I found it hard to believe they discussed anything other than the size of her tonsils. “I don’t know Maggs.  He is cute but if he’s anything like his friend Flynn I want to steer clear of him.”  It was a good excuse.

She sighed. “Yeah, I said that to Brent, but he claims that even though they are best friends in a lot of ways they are way different.  He practically swore Luke was a good guy.”

Still I wondered when they’d even have time to say two words to each other.  “Maggs.” I began.

“Come on Eme. Now we can go together.”

Her statement reminded me as usual how Maggie poured herself into whatever guy she was dating.  It hadn’t really bothered me in the past because I’d had Paul to fall back on.  But as fate seemed so against me at the moment they both seemed to be in the best part of budding relationships.  I would be left on the sidelines alone.

Giving in way to easily, I asked, “Ok, what time are you going to pick me up?” My eyes again fell on Luke’s jacket in my chair.  I wouldn’t give voice to the fact that I did want to see him.  My resolve  broke.  I didn’t want to be the lone wolf on the sideline.  I wanted a perfect relationship too.  But later when my walls were up again, I would tell myself that I just needed to give Luke his jacket back.  The game was a perfect time to do so.

Maggie showed up at my house an hour before the game so we could get ready.  We were giggling in the bathroom applying makeup when my mom past the open doorway at the hall and stopped.  It felt good to laugh and be a little nervous about meeting a guy.

I’d been the third wheel in Maggie’s previous relationships.  I’d hang out with her and her boy de jour along with any of his friends. Occasionally I’d have an admirer in the group.  It never bothered me to turn them down before.  I guess what I meant was that I never really been interested in anyone seriously since Paul until now.

“Where you guys headed tonight?” she asked.

Mom had slept most of the afternoon in preparation for working another overnight shift at the hospital so I hadn’t had a chance to tell her I was going out to the game with Maggie.

“Football game,” Maggie answered enthusiastically.

Holding the doorframe and inspecting us, she smiled.  “Have a good time,” she said before adding, “don’t be out late.”

Inwardly I cringed at her words hoping she wouldn’t add a time to describe late.  I wanted to maintain my invisible curfew so I hastily said, “No worries, I should be home early.”  I didn’t tell her I’d planned to go to Dewey’s.  I would leave a note about that when we left in case something happened.  But if I got home before she did, I would discretely discard the note because it wouldn’t be necessary.

When we were leaving, I held Luke’s jacket, Maggie gave me the wink and nod.  “You’ve been holding out on me,” she said quizzically.

I knew she was talking about the jacket.  I didn’t want her to read too much into it because after tonight nothing more could come from this thing between Luke and me.

“Oh, since you had my jacket in your car,” I’d sneered, “Luke offered me his to borrow.” I said emphasizing the last word.

She held up a hand in peace not wanting to continue our conversation from last night.  “Ok, you don’t have to be snarky.”

We rode in song, singing our favorite tunes once again overcoming any bad blood.  She’d promised not to leave me tonight unless I wanted to leave without her. I’d rolled my eyes at her when she’d added that last bit.

The place was packed.  We were playing our rivals and the game was destined to be a good one.  The temperature wasn’t yet chilly, yet girls lucky enough to be dating anyone on the team wore the letterman’s jacket including Maggie.  I’d held Luke’s in my lap.  She and I had gotten more than a few vicious stares from senior girls deciding we weren’t worthy of such treasures when we entered the stands.  I smiled at their frowns.  So maybe I’d brought the jacket to feel like I too was wanted.  I’d been the poor girl who’d not had a boyfriend at school in all the years I been there.  I knew I wouldn’t be able to give the jacket to him while he was on the field dressed in full football gear. Being honest with myself, I’d wanted people to see me with it.  Was that wrong?

When Paul arrived, he’d sat a row behind us.  I saw Amber wave from the sidelines in her way too short cheerleading uniform but I’d didn’t hold that against her.  I knew she was a nice girl or Paul wouldn’t date her.

She glanced at me before moving back into cheerleading mode.  I wanted to talk to Paul but I didn’t want to make her feel like I was trying to steal him from her.  A girl like her would have power over Paul I couldn’t imagine and I didn’t want to lose him.  So I made a show of putting on Luke’s jacket and turning to Paul giving Amber a good view of the name on the back when I leaned back to chat with my other best friend.

“Hey,” I said.

He looked at me with much curiosity.  He wasn’t one to make flashy statements in public so I didn’t expect him to comment on the jacket.  I answered his unspoken question.

“I know. It’s a long story, but I plan to give him the jacket back tonight at the pond.”

Maggie turned and stared at me. “I can’t believe you said that.  You haven’t even given the guy a chance.”

I sighed again.  I hadn’t thought before I spoke.  “Maggs, I just don’t think I want to date him.” I lied softly.

Maggie swiveled around to face Paul.  “Paul, talk some sense into her.  She’s never given any guy a chance, except you.”

Great I thought.  She would bring that up.  “Ignore her.” I said patiently.  “She thinks the whole world should be happy when she is.”

Maggie gave me a cool stare. “And what so wrong with that?”

I didn’t get to answer because the crowd got to their feet as our team made a push towards the goal line.  I took the opportunity to step up a row and sat next to Paul when the crowd finally silenced after the extra point kick.  Very softly because ears were all around I gave Paul a skimmed overview of last night’s events.  He nodded.

“What should I do?” I asked.

“I trust you’ll end up doing the right thing.”

That hadn’t been the answer I was looking for as it was riddled with holes.  What was the right thing?  That’s subjective to the whim of the one holding it.

“He’s a nice guy though,” he said.

I shot him a glance not sure why he added that last sentence.  “Flynn can be a dick and frankly I’m pissed on how he treated you last night and I told him so.”

My eyes widened.  I didn’t know that Paul had come to my rescue.  “Stay away from him, ” he added.

That was an understatement. “You don’t have to worry. He has no equanimity.  I planned to never speak to him again.”

He smirked as if he didn’t truly believe.

“I’m not like all the rest of the girls,” I said. Ok, I did recognize he was incredible eye candy, but that couldn’t be helped.  Of course I kept that thought to myself.

“I know,” he said definitively.

“Are you going down to Dewey’s after the game?” I asked, changing the subject.

He nodded.  “I’ll call you later after I take Amber home.”

I nodded back before moving to sit next to Maggie again.

Our team won in grand fashion on the last play.  The game was close the whole way through and would have legendary status for years to come.  One for the record books I was sure and would make the senior year book page as well.

We made it to Dewey’s in a large processional of cars.  Several spots in the front of the parking lot were left for the football players who hadn’t made it yet.  Maggie, Paul and I found an empty patch of grass to wait for our prospective dates.  The cheerleaders hadn’t shown up yet either.

“Maggie, Brent’s not as bad as Flynn but the guys no saint. Be careful not to do anything you might regret.”

I was glad our surrogate big brother gave Maggie that advice because she wouldn’t listen to me.  She turned and curtly said, “That goes for you and Amber too.”

I felt wedged in the middle sitting between them.  Paul was my best friend and was friends with Maggie by default.  So we usually sat in this pattern.

“Both of you should be safe if you know what I mean,” I said with a laugh trying to break what could become a battle of wills.  Maggie being the youngest with two older brothers, she resented another surrogate big brother telling her what to do.  She’d just gotten rid of both her brothers to college in the last couple of years.

Their gazes turned on me just as the sounds of hoots and hollers preceded the grand entrance of the football team and cheerleading squad.  Maggie was on her feet walking in the general direction of the cars now parking with a brief “see you in a minute,” phrase said off handed to me.

Paul leaned over to me and spoke softly to ensure nothing would be heard.  But with the loud music blasting from what appeared to be another senior’s Jeep Wrangler with an amazing sound system, Paul needed not bother with the hushed tones.

“I know nothing happened with the kiss with Flynn but still be careful.”

I had thought about that.  I’d wondered if maybe my mother had been wrong.

“No worries, I don’t plan to kiss anyone tonight.”

He turned and squeezed my arm before giving me a quick kiss on the cheek then he too was gone heading over where a bunch of seniors were gathered by the Jeep.  I wanted to put my hand on my cheek to hold in the warmth from his kiss.  Nothing in life was fair.  I was still looking to my left to hide my emotions.  The commotion of the team’s arrival came from my right where both Maggie and Paul as well was the rest of the student body seemed to be going to congregate.

Over a month ago, I would have been curled in my living room with at least Paul if not Maggie eating popcorn and watching Sci-Fi movies.  Paul and I shared a secret passion for space and other frontiers.  Maggie didn’t care but would watch anyway.   But I’d lost my friends to the dating game.  And honestly I shouldn’t be here.  I was being selfish.  I would make things right and give Luke his jacket by the end of the night and go back to my passive self and ignore the  longing in my heart.

When I felt the person sit to my right so close, I inwardly smiled feeling happy that Luke hadn’t waited to come find me.  I turned with a radiant smile to beam at him.  I couldn’t help the emotion that bubbled inside me.  The smile abruptly fell into a glower when I saw it was Flynn who sat next to me.

This just couldn’t be happening to me.  I didn’t understand why he is fixated on me all of a sudden.  I wished he would leave because I didn’t want any speculation about us.  The gossip mill is a beast in high school.  Nothing went unnoticed.

I scooted away not wanting to touch him. “Please leave me alone,” I said with my palms on my forehead in disgust.

“We need to-,” he began.

I felt hands on my shoulders and titled my head far back to see Luke looming over me. I was never so grateful to see a boy in my life.

“Flynn, Amanda is looking for you,” Luke said with impeccable timing.

Flynn’s expression was unreadable as I turned to watch him get up and leave.   Luke sat next to me in the spot Paul had vacated.  “Thanks for that.” I said.

“Is there something going on between the two of you?” he asked.  It wasn’t an accusation, so I didn’t get on the defensive.

I frowned. This is exactly what I was afraid of.  “Not in a million years. I don’t understand why he’s fixated on me.” I said before I could stop the words.  I wasn’t sure why I’d told him that.

He laughed. “He probably feels really bad about last night and wants to apologize,” he said with a shrug.

“You tell him I’m not interested in anything from him ever,” I said drawing out the last word.

“Never mind him. I’m glad you came.”  He was looking at me with impassioned eyes.   The blue shinned like stars in the darkness.

“Well, I needed to give you your jacket back.”

He looked down at me when I realized I was still wearing it.

I smiled. “Let me take it off.”

He put a gentle hand on my arm and said, “Keep it.”  I knew he didn’t mean forever but rather a message that he wanted me to wear his jacket for now.  I smiled again at him not sure what to say as my moral conscious was telling me to say the words and leave or rather run before it was too late.

We ended up leaning back and staring at the sky as we talked about school and some of the teachers I have that he’d had last year.  He told me about current teacher he had that I might have next year.  He warned me of the good, bad, easy A, and hard grader teachers.  We laughed some more and made jokes and it was really nice.

Then he leaned up while I still lay on the ground and looked at me with those dreamy blue eyes of his.  I knew what was about to happen but was paralyzed to stop it.  Lifting on one elbow, he turned to me.  Then moving down towards me, he kissed my right cheek then grazed over my lips to kiss my left cheek.  The softness of his touch left a tingling sensation on those spots.

I tried to show equanimity rather than the all out panic I felt.  With no other means of resistance, I got to my feet and shrugged out of his jacket.  I held it out to him and let it go as soon as his hand touched it. “I’m sorry, I can’t do this.” I said and fled his confused expression.

I nearly ran toward the throngs of people in search of Maggie. I found her sitting on the back of a flat bed truck lip-locked with Brent.  I didn’t bother to be cool or worry about breaking their little moment.  I stormed up to them and demanded her keys.  Puzzled, she fished them out of her pocket and I snatched them without a word.

Chapter Six

solipsistic (adj.) believing that oneself is all that exists

obdurate (adj.) unyielding to persuasion or moral influences

I sat in Maggie’s car on the driver’s side with the seat reclined nearly flush with the back seat.  Tears burned down my cheeks in silence as I wondered why me.  It all wasn’t fair.  I’d wished I was a vampire if such things existed instead of a succubus.  Based on folklore, they were just as deadly but possessed the power to not harm anyone if they chose. They most likely could have normal relationships. Sullenly I wondered why I was ever born.  It totally sucked to be me.

If I had wanted to make a bigger scene, I would have marched back to Maggie and insisted she take me home.  My best friend in the world had failed me again.  She hadn’t come after me when she’d seen I was upset.  I was really trying not to be mad at her for that.  This was the second time she’d chosen a boy over our longtime friendship.  But then neither Paul nor Luke had come either.  I didn’t blame Luke because well in Mercy fashion I’d basically told him I wasn’t interested.  Hadn’t that had been my plan all along? It just wasn’t in the way I’d meant to do it.  Well, I hadn’t seen Paul and I couldn’t fault him either.

Thinking of Pau,l I realized just how understatedly quiet he’d been tonight.  It almost seemed as though he was deep in thought maybe even a bit troubled.  I would have to ask him later tonight when he called.  I wasn’t being a good friend either.

There was a Star Trek movie marathon tonight that what seemed like a million years ago would have been the highlight of my evening with Paul there hogging the popcorn.  It was doubtful we’d share snacks anytime soon.

A light tap jolted me, giving me a violent shake before I turned towards the driver’s side window.  When I saw who it was I was, my hands held out the either side of my head in disgust. I was completely flabbergasted.  I couldn’t believe his arrogance.  I turned away hoping to ignore him enough so he’d just leave.

“Just give me five minutes,” came Flynn’s muffled voice through the closed window.

I ignored him.  He’d caused me way too much trouble.

“Mercy, just crack the window so we can talk.”

I did and immediately said, “You are a solipsistic obdurate asshole.” Then I rolled the window back up to continue to ignore him.

“What the hell?  You and these words,” he muttered loud enough they came clearly through the closed window.  I felt completely satisfied that I’d confused the great and wonderful Flynn.  Still, he didn’t leave though.

A loud thud resonated through the car before I realized his fist must have connected with the top of Maggie’s car.  Temper temper, I thought.  Before I could send a slew of expletives his way another figure loomed into the passenger side window I was facing.  I only saw torso but based on the white graphic tee I recognized, I discerned Luke had come.  Was he here for me or Flynn?

I heard a hushed conversation but couldn’t make out any words.  A few moments later another thud rocked through the car before I heard the tap of feet storming away.  As Luke’s figure remained in the window I had to assume he was able to get Flynn to leave.  So maybe he was here for me after all.

He bent down, face grim.  He pointed and I knew he wanted in.  I turned and popped the locks without hesitation using the key pad on the driver’s side door then waited as the passenger side door opened and Luke folded himself in the car.  Maggie had a small girly car the kind not made for tall sturdy boys like Luke.  He adjusted the seat back as far as it could go before closing the door.

His hand came to my still damp face and wiped the tears that had left their mark from my face. “I’m sorry Flynn keeps bothering you.  I’ll talk to him tonight,” he promised and I could see into his eyes he meant it.

“It’s not that, even though he’s a solipsistic obdurate jerk.” I mumbled before I could stop myself.  Every time he was around I felt compelled to tell him my life’s story.  I wanted to grab the words out of the air before they reached his ears but it was too late.

He stared into my eyes as if he could read my mind before he said, “It’s never as bad as it seems.”

I wondered how what seemed like wise words although I didn’t reason with them, could come from the mouth of a teenage boy.  Paul had been there for me but his advice was one with the limits of teen years. I couldn’t help but wonder what’d happened in his life that made him grow up a bit more than the rest of us.

“I think in this case it is,” I said sadly.

He took my hand and I was reminded how touchy-feely he was.  But in a weird way it didn’t creep me out like I thought it should.

“I like you. And it’s clear that kissing you is not an option,” he said wisely then paused. “I can wait until you’re ready if you give me a chance.”

So not only was he deep he was intuitive as well. His words hit my heart like a battering ram breaking the outer shell of protection that surrounded it.

I couldn’t speak because there were no words as least none that should be said.  It would seem he was granting me the gift I’d coveted for two years.  But Luke was a seriously hot senior with friends like lip-lochness Brent whose mouth was like a magnet to my dear friend Maggie. Furthermore his best friend Flynn was the future Pompous Prom King and a dismal excuse for the human male species whose sole goal in life was to break the heart of every girl in school.  It would be in his nature to want much more than I could offer which was nothing but friendship.  And the look in his eyes clearly conveyed that friendship wasn’t what he was looking for.

So I said nothing turning in my seat so my back was flush with it.  I didn’t take my hand from his but rather stared out in the night.  I so wanted this dream to be real.  But somehow I knew I’d wake up in a few minutes.   Luke turned his head to stare out into the night.  He didn’t press me for an answer.  Instead we sat in comfortable silence.

Chapter Seven

affinity (n.)a spontaneous feeling of closeness

The night had ended with Maggie rousing me with a rap on the window.  Evidently I hadn’t gotten enough sleep the night before.  I did feel Luke’s hand leave mine before I turned to see him halfway out the car.  Who was this guy?  He couldn’t be real.  He’d stayed with me .  I wiped at my mouth to make sure I hadn’t drooled.  Gratefully I hadn’t.  I hadn’t the chance to say goodbye or even thank him before he melted into the pool of people still mingling about.

“So maybe I was right and Luke is a good guy,” Maggie crooned standing outside the car waiting for me to move to the passenger seat.

Sliding over unwilling to get out the car I said, “Yeah, he’s ok.”

“Ok, he was holding your hand while you slept and the way he was looking at you, well the look clearly said he was interested.”

I wanted to know exactly how he was looking at me but I couldn’t feed Maggie’s interest. Whatever was going on between Luke and I would have to end.

My feet landed on something other than the floor.  I bend over to pull Luke’s letterman jacket up.  I smiled.  He wasn’t giving up and if I could be honest, I didn’t want him to.  I told her, “He’s just a nice guy that all.”

“Nice, those weren’t the words you used for Flynn.”

My mood changed at the name.  I couldn’t believe how much I disliked him. “He’s a royal pain.”

“Yeah, stick with Luke and don’t give Flynn a shot.”

“What do you mean? I have no affinity for Flynn and no intention of giving him anything.” I said.  I didn’t know why everyone thought Flynn was in to me.  Certainly his actions so out weighted his supposed interest.

“I’m just saying.  Girls always fall for his charms no matter how many times he shows himself as a bad boy.”

Bad boy wasn’t the right word and in the last day or so I had come up with several choice words from my word of the day repertoire that more accurately portrayed him.  Some of which I thought were quite clever and brought a smile to my face.

“What are you smiling about,” she said with a leer.

“Nothing,” I said leaving it alone.

Of course she took that opening to go into a barge of the latest between her and Brent.  I wanted to gag the way she gushed over him. I didn’t know what they had in common but an uncanny taste for each other’s salvia and that was just gross thinking about it.

Surprising, it seemed as though they’d found time for conversation.  She went on and on about his likes and how they were so like hers.  I sat listening and thinking that some of those likes were very new.  I’d known her likes all her life.  The five minutes we’d spent on my problem seemed inconsequential to the near hour we spent on Brent between the car ride to my house and the time we spend in my living room over hot chocolate.  But I wouldn’t blame her.  I believe if she’d known just what a struggle it was for me to not be in a relationship due to my inhuman existence, she would be interested in the tidbits of my situation.  I was the bad friend who couldn’t trust her with the truth.  And I think soon I would tell her no matter what my mom said.  I needed her.

Right after I waved goodbye to Maggie as she pulled out of the drive, my phone rang from the depths of my skinny jeans pocket.  I shimmed it out to read Paul’s name on the display.  With a relief I piled into the nearest sofa which was in the living room curling my legs underneath me as I answered.  The yellow sofa so reminded me of him.

“Hello,” I said a bit breathily as sank into the cushions.

“Someone with you Merce?” Paul teased, making a joke at my breathing hard.

“Funny,” I said dryly. “No, Maggie just left.”

“If you’re tired I could call you tomorrow,” he said being considerate as always.

“No,” I said a little too eagerly.  I was afraid I wouldn’t get to talk to him anytime soon.

“You sure,” he questioned.

“Yeah, I’m up,” I said with raised eyebrows.  “How about you? You seem like you have something on your mind.”

He paused.  “It’s nothing.  Like you I guess, I’m a bit tired.”

“Then you should get some sleep, I don’t want to bother you with my problems.”

“I want to help,” he said.  He sounded so sincere but I knew he may have to work the next day.  I didn’t want to burden him.

“I’ll be fine.  It’s really nothing I can’t handle.”

He paused again. “You don’t have to lie to me.  We’re better than that.”

I gave a deep sigh.  There was nothing I could say that would refute his statement.  He spoke before I had a chance too.“So give me the whole story.”

“From what point?” I asked because so much had happened.

“From the beginning,” he said.

I took a deep breath.  He was so good at listening to me.  So I told him.  I started where this mess began giving him all the details I would give a girlfriend except without the speculation and giggles.  Paul wasn’t a girlfriend.  He was however still one of my best friends and he was very methodical.  He needed to hear the details in order to come to appropriate conclusion.

“So,” I breathed again.

“Stop that,” he said.

“Stop what?” I asked.

“Breathing like that.  It’s distracting,” he said.

I closed my mouth not sure what to make of it.  “Well,” I said as still he hadn’t given me his thoughts.

“I don’t know.  My best guess is the Flynn may be into you.”

“I don’t’ think so, but it’s getting creepy.”

“On the other hand, Luke is his best friend and well he’s basically told you he is in to you.  Flynn would know that I would think.  So maybe Luke’s right and he just wants to apologize.”

“Now you’re not helping,” I said on another deep sigh.  I had to applaud him.  He’d given my problem more thought than Maggie.

“So why did you go to the car in the first place?” he asked.

I hadn’t told him I cried.  I would keep that to myself.  “I wasn’t going to sit in the grass by myself like a total dweeb.  You and Maggie were otherwise occupied and I didn’t have a way to get home.”

“Merce, you could have hung out with us.”  He meant him and Amber.  As nice as he thought that was, I’d rather had sat in the car with Flynn than to be the third person in a couple.

“I wasn’t going to sit between the make out sessions.  That is not only being a third wheel it’s also totally unfair.”

“Yeah, I know. But you can handle it. You’ve done a good job so far.”

“Not really.  I can count the number of times in total not just people I’ve kissed on two fingers.”

“I don’t know how it was for you. But for me it was electric and nearly stopped my heart,” he said on a slight chuckle.

“Very funny.  Just pour it on.” I laughed.

“At least I made you laugh,” he said soberly. “I know this totally sucks for you.”

He took the words out of my mouth. “Maybe you should talk to your mother,” he added.

“Yeah, like I’m going to say to her that I’m in desperate need to kiss someone.”

“Desperate?” he questioned.

Shoot, I said that word didn’t I?  “I was exaggerating. But yeah, it stinks that my two best friends are in what appears to be in great relationships and I’m forced to go stag in fear I might kill someone.”

There was silence again and I thought maybe the phone signal dropped.  “I’ll kiss you again,” he said softly.  Then he added, “If you promise not to kill me,” sounding sarcastic but I felt his original soft spoken statement was so sincere. I struggled with how much I cared for him.  He had Amber and I had the succubus demon.

“Thanks,” I said softly letting him know I’d really appreciated his friendship plus it was the only reply I could come up with.

We talked for a while longer before I began to yawn and Paul told me to get some sleep.  I hung up with him replaying that line in my head until I fell asleep.  I really believed he would kiss me again to ease my pain.

I had an affinity for Paul I didn’t think I could feel for someone else until Luke came along.  I didn’t think however that anyone could replace Paul in my heart.

Chapter Eight

harrowing (adj.) greatly distressing, vexing

I woke late the next morning thankful that my mother wasn’t one to bother me in the mornings.  I’d done the chores yesterday but she trusted me completely to take care of my responsibilities including my homework, therefore she did nag me much.  So when I rose close to noon, I found the house empty.  The rumble in my stomach urged me towards the kitchen.   I complied unaware of the harrowing day to come.

Turning to the food network channel, I tried to get in the mood to make a late lunch for my mom and I.  She wasn’t home now but I knew today was her day off.  I was certain she be home soon.  I thought I cook something to warm her palette for questions I wanted, no better yet I needed, answered.  Paul had been right.  She was the only one who could truly help me.  I just needed to find a way to get my answers without raising her suspicion.

With the hum of the television flowing from the small family room off from the kitchen, I searched the refrigerator for ingredients I needed for what I had in mind.  My mom, more succubus than human, wasn’t much of a cook.  Her needs for food were out weighted by her needs for the tasteless human life force.  I, on the other hand, was more human than demon, so my food needs were greater.

When I was younger I suffered through the meals my mother tried to cook.  Wanting to help because she worked such odd hours to keep shelter over our head, I’d learned to cook own my own.  I’d grown quite fond of cooking over the past couple of years.  I wouldn’t consider myself a gourmet cook or even a chef but I think I was pretty good.   Paul and Maggie found my cooking to be superb and on occasion I think they liked my cooking even over their own mothers.  My affinity for cooking may seem weird.  But when you can’t date, food seemed like a great substitute.

Nearly finished, my meal consisted of breaded chicken breast served over linguine in a lemon butter sauce and grilled asparagus on the side.  Sounds fancy but it is relativity easy.  I had my chicken prepared with my pasta draining when a knock came at my door.  The only chore I had left was to complete the sauce.  I was a bit annoyed at the intrusion.  Although Maggie hadn’t called I wouldn’t put it past her to show up at my door.  I washed my hand as the doorbell sounded.  The impatience of whoever was at the door only further proved to annoy me.

Drying my hands on my pink Juicy sweat velour pants, I headed to the door.  When my mom bought me this set for my birthday, I’d smiled but silently loathed the outfit at first.  Beside the god awful amount of money she’d spent on it, I wasn’t much of a pink person.  That goes to show you what she knew about me.  When I was little I’d loved pink, but I’d grown out of the bubble gum look long ago.  But the soft feel of the material and total comfort I felt wearing them I’d come to covet them over most items in my closet.  Therefore I wore them a lot around the house.

I opened the door to find Flynn on my door step.  He pushed past me before I could slam the door in his face.  I stood for a second shell shocked at his appearance.  But then why should I?  It seems he’d been semi stalking me since the party Friday at Jays.

He made his way uninvited into my living room and stood with a grin on his face while he looked me up and down.  It was then I realized that in my comfort without fear of company, I was wearing a plain white tank top and no bra with my sweats.  My body type would be considered bean pole by most if not for my chesty appearance.  Normally I dressed to hide my amble chest so guys wouldn’t gawk or their eyes would remain on my face.  Embarrassed but extremely pissed at the same time I folded my arms to cover my upper body.

“Please leave.” I said relatively calmly.  “I’ve already had a harrowing day.”

He turned and sat in a chair against the short wall that separate the living room from the front entrance.

“Not until we talk,” he said still smiling.  “And could you please use words I don’t need a reference guide to comprehend.”

I wanted to wipe the smile of his face more than anything in the world.  Right now I could have cared less how good looking he was.

“I have absolutely nothing to say to you. Can’t you get that,” I said moving closer tempted to point and jam my finger in his chest.

“It’s about Friday,” he said no longer smiling sounding serious.

Childishly, I wanted to plug my fingers in my ear and sing la la la to myself like a little child but I resisted. “You are a..,” I began.

He cut me off and said, “Forget the big words.  I’m not dumb but I’m not a walking dictionary either.”

“Bastard,” I cried out.

“Seeing that my mother’s dead and I live with my father that word is hardly appropriate,” he said with a smirk.

His reference to his departed mother almost made me feel sorry for him, almost.  This time I moved and I did point my finger as I lowered to his face. “Get out now,” I said slowly enouncing ever word with calm venom.  His utter determination to stay, infuriated me.

“I will just after we clear something up,” he said.

I spun on my heels prepared to go hold open the door until he walked out of it when I lost my balance and fell across his lap.  Wide eyes and humiliated, I watched as his head began to descend to mine as if he would possibly try to kiss me again.  His grin widened as my frown deepened.

The sound of the front door opening with my mom calling out my name had me stunned into silence.  The hand I had balled up to punch Flynn now rested with one finger on his lips to silence him.

We didn’t breathe as my mom came into view past the wall that partial hit us.  She had grocery bags in her hand which was so déjà vu back to that incident with Paul.  I reiterated in my head the knowledge that this could not be happening.  I could hear the rules and lectures spill out her mouth if she saw me in this compromising position.  If he and I had just been talking it would have been no big deal.  But our current position looked bad.

With determined strides, my mom headed straight for the kitchen. When I was certain she was going to stay in there to put away the groceries, I got to my feet as silently as I could.

I wagged a finger at Flynn to follow me.  With my other hand, I continued to silence him with the one finger to my lips.  Like a good dog, he got up without word.  I wondered how many times he’d had to flee a girl’s house.   Answering my own question I figured probably plenty because he didn’t protest leaving me this time.

I pulled open the door grateful for the television noise from the family room to dampen the sound.  He left and I closed the door before he could possibly whisper anything to me.  I leaned back on the door framed closing my eyes realizing just how close that had been to disaster.  I wouldn’t have gotten into trouble for having a boy over. But it hadn’t looked good at all with me on Flynn’s lap.  So I used the situation as an excuse to get him to leave.

“Mercy, there you are. Why are you leaning on the door?” my mom asked coming out of the kitchen.

I breathed in deeply trying to think fast. “Oh, I heard your call. I thought you had stuff in the car you needed my help with.”

“No, I’ve put everything away.  Least I could do since you do all the cooking,” she said with a wink.

I gave her a quick chuckle that ended in a sigh.

“It smells wonderful.  When will it be ready?” she asked.

“Soon, I just need a minute to make the sauce.”  I moved off the door and quickly into the kitchen to finish up.

We sat in the quasi dining room which was a small area off the kitchen. When I was about to turn the conversation ever so slightly to allude to my questions about the succubus that lived inside me, she dropped a bomb on me.

On a swallow she said, “There is a man I’ve want you to meet.”

Not getting it at first, I said, “Who?”

“Mercy, I think I’m in love.”

I nearly choked.  Since when did she date let alone find time to fall in love.  It hardly seemed fair either.  Did everyone have someone but me, I wanted to cry out.

“I know it may seem weird or sudden,” she said. “But we’ve been dating for a several months. I couldn’t introduce you until I was sure things were serious.”

There were a lot of words that I wanted to shout maybe even scream, but I kept those words tight against my chest for fear I might spill everything I was going through.

“I didn’t tell you because I wanted to be sure before I brought any man into your life.”

Well, at least that answered one question and also made me settle a bit.

“So he and his son will join us for dinner on Thursday.”

He had a son.  Oh, the questions I had.  “Is he human?” I blurted out curtly.

She looked at me as she drank from her wine glass.  She raised her eyebrows to my tone I was sure.  Frankly, I was a bit pissed that she was happy and I wasn’t.  Maybe that seemed unfair, but she is the one that put restrictions on my dating life.  She could teach me what I needed to know.  But she hadn’t.

She seemed to be mulling the question over in her head as she swirled the wine glass ever so gently around in a circle.  When the glass stopped moving she said calmly.  “He’s one of us.”

“He’s a succubus.” I blurted out.  I was astonished not expecting this answer at all.

“No, he’s incubus.  That’s the male name for what we are.  They are our counterparts.”

“What does that mean?”  I asked.  Maybe this conversation will makes its way back to my agenda.

“They’re the same for the most part but called a different name,” she said openly.

I should have stuck to this line of topic, but I didn’t.  Instead I asked, “How did you meet him?”

Still looking at me as if I wasn’t quite asking the right questions she replied, “At the hospital.”

I could have asked more but found myself pondering the remarkable turn of events.  We ate some more in silence.  I knew she could feel the tension in the air between us.

She finally broke it, “What’s going on Mercy?”

“Truth,” I countered.  I kept my gaze on here.

“Yes,” she said.

Well let the flood gates open. “It seems royally unfair that everyone around me is dating.”

“Honey,” she started.  Her voice was patronizing I felt.

I rolled my eyes. “When are you going to teach me how to control that side of me?”  There, I’d said it.

She paused again and I waited for the excuse to come.  When it did, it wasn’t well thought out.  She just said, “The timing isn’t right.”

“Yeah, perfect excuse to keep your daughter in line,” I said.

“That’s not fair,” she said.

I stood.  “Yeah, you’re exactly right.  It’s not fair.”

I left the table and went to my room. Tucking my headphones connected to my ipod in my ear, I turned on my playlist lying on my bed with my hands folded under my head.  I was tempted to call Maggie but she’d gone with her parents to her uncle’s house for a birthday party.  I didn’t want to bother her.  Paul was working.  So I lay thinking about any other options I had.  Looking at my chair, I thought about him.  I could have called him as he seemed so willing to be there for me.  But whatever we had was to new for me to dump on him.  But curiosity spurred me to action in a small way.  I decided to take a chance.  I texted Luke a single word. “Hi.”

Instantly I got a reply. It read “Hi back”.

I close my eyes because I knew I’d just opened the door to something I’ve wanted a very long time.

Chapter Nine

spurious (adj.) false but designed to seem plausible

Walking into school Monday morning should have been as unmemorable as every Monday.  Funny how in everything can change in one weekend.  I walked through the front doors of the school with Maggie who sported her new boyfriend’s jacket as if it were a badge of honor.  Yes, it was official they were the real deal.  I on the other hand still carried Luke’s jacket over my arm conflicted as to what to do.

The extent of our texting had ended with his reply to me.  I hadn’t had the nerve to say anything more.  I smiled at the thought.  I hadn’t yet deleted the conversation from my phone.  The possibilities had warmed and sated me the rest of my Sunday.

My smile faded when I was instantly accosted by Nina Summers, well not exactly.  She stared at me with hateful eyes as she shook her head talking to her friends, Kathy and Amanda.  They turned and starred at me too before turning back to her as if consoling her.

I took a deep breath as I should have expected that.  Nina was Luke’s ex-girlfriend.  The pretty brunette’s eyes appeared red and damp.  I knew along with the whole school they’d only broken up a couple of weeks ago.  I hadn’t really thought too much about it until now because I hadn’t known either of them that well.  Based on her scorn, apparently she’d assumed they would get back together.  I looked down at the jacket I carried.  Rumors must have spread about me wearing it at the game.

Crap, I didn’t need this.  Frankly I should give her his jacket and encourage him to get back with her.  I hope she hadn’t confronted Luke and confirmed he was interested in me. Her eyes were still pinned on me because I could feel the burn in the back of my head.  It was obvious she’d gotten that very message.

“Did you see that?” Maggie said after we’d turned the corner down the hall to our lockers.

“Let’s not talk about it,” I said while dialing the combination on my locker.  Once the hatefully thing opened, I shoved Luke’s jacket inside.  I decided it wasn’t worth the trouble today.  Gossip was already spreading rampant without me adding fuel to it.

“I’m just saying you’d think she owned him or something,” Maggie said not leaving it alone.

“Think about how you would feel if Brent dumped you and a few weeks later he replaced you with a freshman.”

Her face snapped back to mine.  “That’s not funny,” she said with her eyes twisted in an evil stare.

“So, now you understand,” I said, peering back at her with my books in hand.

“Ok, you made your point,” she said, her face morphing back into a grin.

Holding my books, I leaned my back on my now closed locker as Maggie added a fresh coat of lip gloss using her locker mirror.  I saw the group of boys as they rounded the same corner we had minutes ago.

“Hey,” I said grabbing her attention.  “I need to talk to Ms. Hutchinson before class.” I said rapidly as the boys approached. “I’ll see you at lunch.”

Making my get away, I headed away from the oncoming group of friends in the opposite direction.  That meant I would have to walk in the wrong direction all the way to the cafeteria and back to get to my first period. It was worth it though.  It may have been cowardly, but I wasn’t ready to deal with Flynn or even Luke just yet.  They both were with Brent and were headed in our direction.  It was clear they were planning to stop and at least say hi.

Turning the corner on the opposite end of the hall heading towards the cafeteria, I turned back slightly.  Brent had indeed stopped at Maggie’s locker.  I moved my eyes to see that Flynn was looking in my general direction as Maggie pointed.   He hadn’t found me yet. Luke however had.  His eyes burned on mine.  I moved quickly to avoid reading what I thought I saw in them, regret.

Regret could mean a lot of things.  Did he regret giving me his jacket?  That act had started all this mess.  Or was it because of my obvious retreat?  I quickened my steps because I had a long way to go in order not to be late for class.  I tried not to think anymore about Luke.

Thankfully Nina and I didn’t share a single class.  So although there was talk and I was certain there was, I breezed through my morning classes with no more incidents.  Our paths didn’t even cross in the hallway.

Lunch, however, proved most interesting.  Clouds hung heavy with rain.  Fat drops poured down on the courtyard making eating outside impossible.  Instead we sat at our favorite inside lunch table.  Its perch was perfectly centered against the wall of windows that faced the quad.  Sitting with my backs to the quad I had an effective view of the entire lunchroom from all vantage points.

Talking about the project that was assigned in English class, Maggie was in full banter when Brent sat next to her.  The Elite normally sat caddy corner at the far end of the rectangular shaped cafeteria against that wall.  This sudden appearance of him settling in at our table had a more than a few heads turning to take in this change.

“Maggie,” Brent said then nodding at me, “Mercy.”

“Hey,” I said just as Luke slid into the seat next to me.  Shyly I turned and gave him a smile.  Surprisingly I wasn’t going to be a third wheel today.  With his bright eyes on me, well he smiled back.

“Hi,” I said to him ignoring Maggie’s vibrant conversation that easily changed focus from me to Brent.  That’s Maggie for you.

“Hey,” Luke said back to me.  Brent however not fully engrossed with Maggie yet, gave us a look before he focused back on her.   That look was telling like he was gauging my reaction to Luke.  Maggie was all teeth with her humongous grin.  I knew she secretly hoped Brent would share lunch with her.  Even though they were together, I guess lunch hadn’t been a topic of their conversations.  She laughed and talked to Brent as if they’d been friends forever.  I envied her for the gift of gab.  I wasn’t sure what to say next to Luke.  Thankfully he took the lead.

“How was the rest of your weekend?” he asked with a hidden smile.  The only day I hadn’t seen him was Sunday, but I grabbed at the opportunity to share the story of my unexpected visitor.

“Well, interesting,” I said, “Until Flynn showed up uninvited at my house yesterday.” I added the last part with a polite smile, that anyone could have discerned my displeasure from.  I didn’t speak loudly.  I didn’t want to involve Maggie and Brent with this conversation. I kept my attention focused on Luke when the devil himself saddled up to our table with Amanda in toe.

Flynn sat as if he’d been sitting at our table all year long.  Unfortunately for me his chosen seat was next to Maggie nearly directly across from me.  Amanda stood for a few moments reluctant to join our table, but eventually sat next to him.  She didn’t go willingly as she threw a glance back at her friends who stood in an aggrieved stance. Glancing up at them, I looked to see Kathy and Nina unsure what to do.

Nina, great, I thought.  Flynn and Nina at our table made my stomach roll.  I looked down at my half eaten lunch.  The turkey club sandwich with crispy bacon had looked extremely good when I selected it, but now it looked dried up.

Jay strolled up to our table and stated the obvious, “New table today?” and sat down making room between Flynn and I on my other side without getting an answer.  Kathy and Nina, now having no other choice, sat as well.

Conversation erupted with Jay in the lead talking about the upcoming football game this Friday.  Besides raging scandals, the away game was a huge topic around school.  Our team was ranked high and this game was an important one for football fans.  From what I gathered through the looming conversation, it was going to be another tough one.

Picking at my sandwich trying to get my appetite back, I avoided Nina’s glances my way as if my life depended on it.  I truly felt bad for her.  At least at first I did.  Things went south quickly the moment she chimed in.

“So I heard about the party I missed on Friday,” she said to no one in particular.  Nina hadn’t said it loud but her words had been heard because the entire table fell silent.  I suddenly found extreme interest in my sandwich lifting the top hoping that would be the end of her comments.

As soon as I looked up from the invading silence she spoke again. “I wonder how Mercy went from kissing Flynn to being Luke’s girlfriend, I mean they are best friends,” she said spuriously.

Bile shot up in my throat.  I almost made it out of my seat but Luke’s hand landed on my arm and he said two words softly, “Don’t go,” before he turned his attention to Nina.  “Nina, don’t start,” he said to her.   She looked at him with pleading eyes but his were hard and devoid of emotion.  I tentatively sat but hadn’t made any commitments on staying.

I don’t know why but I found myself looking at Flynn.  He was grinning.  He reminded me of a Cheshire cat full of mischief.  I couldn’t believe he was enjoying this.  But based on what I knew of him now, I shouldn’t be surprised.  “Now Nina, don’t cast stones as I remember correctly you tried to kiss me last weekend at Brent’s house,” Flynn said with satisfaction.

Nina went pale and Amanda rounded on her.  With the attention no longer focused on me, I decided to make my escape.  I mouthed to Maggie that I was headed to the bathroom.  Shockingly she too excused herself.  For once I was surprised she hadn’t dumped me for Brent.  Luke gave me a hesitant smile as the shouts were becoming deafening as two friends who wouldn’t be for long fought verbally over a boy who was hardly worth it. He’d saved me in a way, but Flynn enjoyed the pain of friends fighting over him way too much.

“Well, Nina won’t be bothering you anymore,” Maggie said as we exited the lunchroom.

“I’m not so sure about that,” I said.  “The spurious crap she saying people will believe.”  Nina didn’t look like she’d given up but rather her attention was elsewhere at the moment.  If she lost her friend, I was certain her anger would focus on me as an easy target.

“Flynn is into you, Eme.  I think he sees you as some sort of challenge,” Maggie said.  I wondered at that very thing but wouldn’t have spoken it aloud.  Paul had made a comment about that.  Thinking of him, I wondered where he’d been at lunch.  He and Amber were conspicuously absent.  Alone in the bathroom, Maggie and I peered into the mirror fixing the light application of makeup we wore.  It didn’t amount to much but a little on the eyes and a little on the lips.

“Flynn’s into anything that moves,” I said countering her comment.

“I can’t disagree on that, but Brent said something.”  Maggie stopped and stood straight.  I too stopped, totally engrossed in her next words.  I turned to her though in the next second wondering why she was discussing me with Brent.  When did they have time to talk?  That alone still stuck me as unbelievable that they carried on conversations between kissing.

“Look Mercy,” she said and I was quieted because she rarely called me by my given name.  In fact I don’t remember when the last time was.

“Brent said that Luke and Flynn got into it after we left Dewey’s Saturday.”  Why hadn’t she called me before now to tell me this?  Before I accuse her, I closed my mouth and decided to hear her out.  Maybe she hadn’t heard this until recently.

She hesitated, “It didn’t come to blows, but apparently it was all about you.”  I felt my eyebrows raise as my eyes widened as far as they could.

“Yeah, you’re hearing me correctly. I haven’t had the chance to get the whole story yet, but I’m going over Brent’s house tonight after football practice.”  Besides this news, alarm bells rang in my head.  It wasn’t a good idea for those two to be together alone.

“Maggs, what are you doing?  Do you think that’s a good idea?” I said nearly pleading with my words.  We understood each other well after all these years.  She knew the conversation had changed and what I was referring to.

She nearly smiled. “You think that I’m going to,” she stopped then said, “No, we barely been together.  I like him a lot but I don’t love him yet.”  We were talking about her virginity.

I sighed.  “But still,” I said.

“Don’t worry, it’s a group gathering.”

Then my emotions changed yet again.  I felt slighted.  I hadn’t been invited.

Maggie picking up on it said, “I’m sure Luke will invite you,” I was sure if anyone else witness this conversation, they’d assume she could read my mind.  But it was much more than that.  It was years of friendship and sharing everything like sisters that made us this close.  There’d been times especially when she was focused on any one boy our bond would loosen.  But in the end we’d come together like a rubber band.

“I can’t,” I said. “I’ve got that English project, thing.”  I was sure the gathering would include Nina and Flynn and I just really didn’t have time for either.

“Oh, yeah, I do too. Well it’s not until later anyway.”

When the first warning bell rang, we gathered our stuff and left the restroom.  Maggie and I parted.  We didn’t have the same class.  As I continued down the hall Flynn fell in step with me.

“You could thank me,” he said.

Barely turning in his direction I scowled and rolled my eyes.  “I could scream bloody murder too.” I said flippantly.

“You know you’re a tough one,” he said.

I turned to look at him, “I’m the one that doesn’t care.”

“Ouch, you hurt my feelings.”

“Will you leave me alone then?” I ask with a mocking smile on my face.

“Yes, please leave,” the voice said from my left said.  Turning to my savior, I saw Luke had found me too.  This was not good.  Nina’s words had been heard by passersby and those seated in tables near to us.  The rumors were surely swirling.  Added to that, I now knew Flynn and Luke had argued over me which I fully hadn’t processed.  This wasn’t exactly a good time for me to be sandwiched in between the two of them.  Luke’s arm came around my waist as I looked up at Flynn.

Flynn looked disappointed but it faded quickly.  “My bad,” he said and stopped.

Luke and I continued forward.  Not sure what else to do, his hand came from around my waist and took my hand.

“What class do you have?” he asked.

My heart was beating like jungle drums in my chest as I caught the looks of people checking out the new development.

“Um, Pre-Cal.” I said.

“Ms. Whitten or Mr. Brewer?” he asked.

“Mr. Brewer.”

He must have known where his classroom was because he guided me there without directions.  Reaching the door he pulled me to the side next to a bank of lockers out of the way of incoming students.

Looking down into my eyes he said, “I’m really sorry about Nina and Flynn.”

I looked up and into the depths of his beautiful eyes.  I saw myself reflected in them. “Not your fault,” I said softly captured in his gaze.

He leaned down a whisper away from my lips while my heart stopped in anticipation.  Apparently my brain was cut off from communication as the little angel inside my head shouted Don’t. No part of me responded to the warning.

Extremely close his lips brushed mine before they moved and kissed my cheek.  During this I held still.  He whispered, “I’ll find you after school,” right before his body moved from mine taking his warmth with him.  He headed down the hall to his own class.  Not breathing, I stood there for a few more moments as a few of my fellow classmates gaped at me when they entered the classroom.  After I caught my breath, I made my way to my seat flushed with heat.

Let me just say, I didn’t learn anything in math class that day.  I couldn’t even tell you what unit we were on.  I was analyzing ever nuance of that brief encounter.  When the bell rung, I leaped out of my seat and nearly glided to my next class.  I shared AP French with my best friends. I waited outside the door for Maggie who had this and last period with me.

“He nearly kissed you in the hallway in front of the class,” she said after I’d given her the story that began after we parted from the bathroom through to the near kiss.  I looked at her. “I said that too loud huh?” she said.  I nodded.

We walked into class and sat at our seats next to each other.  Paul strode in.  It was the one class we shared.  He’d taken one year of Spanish in middle school before changing to French which is why he shared this class with us.  But there were several other seniors in here as well.  I looked at Maggie to warn her we would need to keep are conversation at a minimum.

Paul sat in the seat behind me and leaned forward. “What the hell, Merce. It’s all over school that you and Nina had a fight over Luke,” he whispered.

I turned sharply to my right so that I could see both Paul and Maggie.  “We didn’t,” I said sharply.  That spurious rumor would easily mingle with the others about me.  There was just nothing I could do to stop it.

Then Mrs. Mott walked in. “S’il vous plait activer vos livres a la page deux cent trente neuf.”  Class had begun.

Chapter Ten

fortuitous (adj.) happening by chance, often lucky or fortunate

Huddled in with Paul, Maggie and I filled him in on the day’s events.  Of course, first we’d question him deeply about his whereabouts at lunch.  Maggie too had noticed his and Amber’s absence.  He turned beet red and declined to answer.

Standing by Maggie’s car in the parking lot, first Amber then Brent sauntered up.  Amber tangled herself in Paul’s arms and Brent hugged Maggie’s shoulder.  Brent looked at all of us, “So you guys coming over tonight?”

Amber swiveled in Paul’s arms swinging her hair looking up at him to get his answer.  For a fleeting moment I have to admit I was a bit jealous.  Paul rested his arms on her shoulders leaning his forehead to hers.  Love struck eyes past between them before he nodded and silently she nodded back in agreement.  Lifting his head and turning to the rest of us, Paul said, “Yeah, we’re in.  What about you Merce?”  His eye met mine.

I looked at him hoping my face wouldn’t betray my feelings.  I turned to a safer option.  I met Maggie’s eyes before answering.  She looked extremely happy.  But I ,on the other hand, had clear memories of Friday night and I had no desire repeating it.

Before I could say anything, Flynn walked over hand in hand with Amanda.  “What’s up guys?”

Brent said, “Just seeing who’s coming over tonight?”

I felt an arm come around me and pull me into a solid chest. “Hey,” Luke said in my ear from behind me.  His voice was light but husky.  I could feel the flush in my cheeks but I made no move to push away.  It felt nice.

“Luke, you in tonight?” Flynn asked.  My choice of saying no felt like it was about to be stolen away.

“Sure,” he said.

Paul said, “Well, see you tonight,” and walked off with Amber.  Flynn followed with Amanda in toe.  Maggie told me she’d be right back and I was left alone with Luke.

He spun me around so I was facing him.  His blue eyes seemed to mesmerize me. “Are you coming tonight?” he asked.

I looked down and away because watching him made me think twice about my reply.  My mom was working second shift.  That meant she wouldn’t be home until after eleven.  Even still I found myself saying, “Not tonight.”

“Can I possibly change your mind?” he asked with palpable hope.  If anyone could, it would be him.

I hesitated. “Not tonight,” I said, repeating myself.

“Luke,” Flynn yelled back to us. “You’re gonna be late for practice.”

He waved him off.  “Well, I guess I have to go. I’ll call you later,” he said, before again brushing his lips over mine leaving them tingling.  If he kept that up, I wouldn’t be able to stop myself.

At home after finishing my homework, I sat on the sofa in the family room with my seventh and eighth grade yearbooks.  Instead of hanging out with everyone, I was looking into the past.  I flipped through looking for Luke, Flynn, Brent and the rest.  Pausing I’d found my picture.  I’d looked so young and hopeful of life.  Then, I hadn’t known what I was and the future was bright.  The television had been just background noise until something the news anchor said caught my attention.

The bold red box on the television read ‘breaking news’.  The news caster said that missing women were feared dead.  Police suggest all women be vigilant, especially when alone.  I looked up as if I could see the front door.  Had I locked it?  An on seen reporter began to talk and I grabbed the remote to turn up the volume.

In short, one missing girl had been found dead.  Troubling for the police had been no apparent cause of death.  They were looking for a person of interest for questioning.  It turned out to be her missing boyfriend.  They showed a sketch of the would be boyfriend.  The pencil drawing bore no resemblance to anyone I knew.  What troubled me about the story was that the both the current missing girl and the victim were from towns close to mine.  The missing girl actually lived on campus at American University, but was home for the weekend.  The town she lived in bordered mine.

Shivering, I got up from my perch on the sofa.  Slowly aware of the silence of the house with the television now off, I headed to the front door.  I could see that the door was locked but I had to make sure.  In fact after unlocking and relocking it, I went and check the locks on all the windows in the house on the lower level before I headed to the kitchen.

Safely with the tools of my craft and a little music from my ipod positioned in my ihome, I shook feel of my passing fear with preparations for dinner.  There was nothing like cooking to sooth whatever bothered me.  My grandmother had enjoyed cooking.  I’d been too young then to learn from her, but I was sure it was from her that I’d gotten the joy of cooking.  Tonight I needed comfort food to wallow in.  Everyone would be headed to or already at Brent’s hanging out while I was home alone. Only if I had enough courage to face my demons, including Flynn, could I be there as well joking around.

I was chopping spring onions when a fortuitous knock came at my door.  Nervously, I jumped at the sound nearly dicing my finger.  I hesitated for a moment.  I wasn’t sure if I should carry the knife to the door.  I groaned at the thought.  But then it dawned on me that it might just be Flynn on the other side of it.  But I remembered he was at Brent’s house.  Maggie, Paul and Luke were there was well, so silly or not I carried the knife with me to the door.  I moved forward down the hall slowly.  The memory of the reported dead girl had me stopping and asking who it was before I opened it.

“It’s Luke,” the voice said.  It sure sounded like him.

I opened the door surprised by his appearance.  He stood tall in the doorway with lightly damp hair, a crisp white shirt and jeans.  Not expecting him I got a view of his amazing face and could help but wonder how I’d landed him.  “You’re here.” I said leaning on the door.  “Are you here fortuitously or was this your plan all along?”

“Fate maybe.  I’d hope to convince you to come with me.  I don’t want to go alone.”

I smiled. He had me caught in his web, but I stayed strong.  “I’m just not up to it tonight,” I said, watching his every movement on the porch.

“Can I come in then?” he asked.

“Sure,” I said stepping to the side to let him in.

He stood in the hallway waiting when I turned from closing the door.  He hesitated before saying, “You hungry?”

“Yes, actually,” I began.

“I can go get us something to eat,” he said cutting in.

“No, that’s ok,” I said and watched a puzzled expression cross his face.  I had been so surprised to see him I wasn’t thinking very well. “I mean, I was about to cook anyway.  You’re welcome to join me.”

“You cook?” he asked, genuinely amazed.

“Nothing fancy tonight, I was about to make burgers and fries,” I said, turning to make my way back to the kitchen.

“You do fancy?” he asked.

“On occasion, but tonight comfort food is on the menu,” I said with a grin.  But I would explore my culinary skills now that I had company and make sure my burger was a bit gourmet.

He sat on a bar stool while I pulled more ingredients out of the refrigerator.  I set up my baby fry daddy to begin heating the oil.  When I grabbed some potatoes his eyes grew large.

“You’re going to make French fries from scratch?”

“Yes,” I said on a laugh.

“Can I help?”

“Do you know how to peel potatoes?” I asked.

“How hard can it be?” he said with a shrug.

So I showed him and left him to do it while finished chopping spring onions to mixed my hamburger meat.  He’d worked wonders, cutting my prep time in half.  With the potatoes cut and ready for the fry daddy, I placed the patties on the grill insert for our gas stove.  I dove into a question I’d been thinking about.

“So tell me about Nina,” I said casually, scooping up a handful of cut fries I’d seasoned lightly.  Sizzling oil popped while I waited for Luke to answer.

Silence hung in the air before he finally said, “Are we really going to talk about ex-girlfriends?”

“Not normally, but this one has my name written in blood,” I said teasingly, still hopeful he might answer.

He paused again as if deciding his words carefully. “She’ll get over it.”

Flippantly, I retorted “Like Carrie did after the pig’s blood incident at the Prom?” I said referring to the classic horror movie titled Carrie.

“Who’s Carrie?” Luke asked.

“It’s like a classic horror film.  Carrie get’s pig blood dumped on her as she’s named prom queen. With her unstable telekinetic ability she rages onto a bloodbath.  Of course, I’m talking about the original film from 1976,” I babbled.

He looked at me with quizzical eyes and I begin to see the blunder I made.  “I guess you don’t like horror films,” I said, sadly.

“I’ve seen some,” he said.  “Just not one’s made in the seventies.”

“Never mind then.”

“Do you have the movie?”

I eyed him suspiciously not sure how to answer because well I did. I looked away pretending to check on the food even though I had my timing down. I mumbled, “Yes.”

He laughed, “Then let’s watch it.”

I turned smiling. I couldn’t help it. “Are you serious?”

“Yeah, can we watch while we eat,” he said.

With toasted buns, burgers, all the trimmings and hot fries we sat in the family room on plush earth tone sofa and ate.  We watched Carrie.  Halfway through the movie we finished eating.  He put his arm around me and I couldn’t help but to snuggle into his embrace.  For the first time in two years, I felt normal.  This at least for me was a million times better than hanging out at Brent’s where Flynn and maybe Nina would have been there.  We didn’t talk about the bad hair do’s or fashion choices of the seventies but rather about how lonely it must have been for Carrie.  Luke amazed me at his insight to the feelings of others.  He didn’t make comments about how hot any girl looked either.  He was certainly a figment of my imagination.

Later when we got up so I could walk him to the door, he held my hand.  “You’re an excellent cook.  I may find myself at your door every evening.  My mom isn’t much of a cook and we eat out a lot.”

“I’ll be here,” I said in open invitation.  Paul and Maggie both showed up on my doorstep on occasion hungry.

He pulled me to him and I melted in his embrace.  He smelled good and I tried to memorize his scent so I could recall it later.  He pulled back without giving me his whisper soft kiss across my lips.  To say I was disappointed would be an understatement.

“I should go,” he said, still holding my hand.  Our arms were stretched across the threshold.  I held on as my body betrayed everything my mind protested against.  I should let him leave.  But I didn’t want him to go.  I didn’t speak a word unsure what part of me the words would come from.

Reading my thoughts he said, “If I stay, I won’t be able to stop myself from kissing you.”

I still didn’t let go.  What was wrong with me? I knew better. Life was so freaking unfair.

A moment longer, I uncurled my fingers in resignation.  He looked at me with my hand in his.  It was his move and I didn’t exhale until he made it.  He let go of my hand.  “Make sure you lock up,” he said.

He must have heard the news about the missing women.  After he stepped away, I closed the door and locked it.  But I realized although there was some fear of the predator that could be nearby, what scared me was Luke.  I knew I had to find a way to kiss him because it was killing me not to.

Chapter Eleven

alacrity (n.) eagerness, speed

I had a plan that I was prepared to execute by Thursday.  In fact, my SAT word of the day was alacrity which meant exactly what I felt, eager, very much so.  The days between Monday and Thursday passed by with great ease.  Flynn had completely stopped bothering me.  In a way, it was really weird after nearly a four day stretch without him in my face or making comments pestering me to hear him out.  I know if I thought to long about it, I’d wonder what had been so important for him to speak to me about.  But thankfully, I had another distraction.

Luke had been a boy I hadn’t bothered to notice before because all boys had been off limits to me.  Now he walked me each day to my first period class.  Interestingly enough he returned to giving me airbrush kisses which only fueled me to put my plan into action. Each time he’d give me the phantom kiss, I have to admit it bedazzled me with imaginary jewels every time he did it.  The way his hand would finger through my hair to cup the back of my head drawing me near was amazing every time.  I’d floated through class and the halls between periods until lunch when I would see him again.

I was shoving my books in my locker before heading to the cafeteria when Maggie squeezed my arm and nearly scared me out of my chucks.  The ones I wore today were grey with a pink tongue.   Changing my style just a bit, I wore a v-neck sweater paired with my usual jeans.  The sweater gave a tiny view to my assets more than I normally showed.  But I was feeling a bit girly these days.  Don’t count it against me.

“Shit Maggie, you scared the  heck out of me.” I said with a scowl I didn’t really mean.  I had been in my head reliving each moment with Luke and hadn’t been paying any attention to anything around me.

I saw her frown and realized that my anger had thrown her off.  Maggie was so American but every now and then you could hear in her voice her Irish roots.  Her father sported an accent even though he basically grew up here.  But his parents had been immigrants to America and they’d taken their family back to Ireland as often as possible.

“Why are you being a dork? Is Flynn bothering you again?  If so, I’ll tell Brent or Luke to kick his ass for you?” she said in a rush of words.

The lyrical tone to her voice snapped me out of the cloud I’d been in.  Her touch had pulled me out and inadvertently irritating the heck out of me.  “Maggs, I’m sorry. Everything’s fine. I shouldn’t have snapped at you.” I said in a sorrowful voice.

She beamed and I realized without her saying as much that all was forgiven. Her green eyes sparkle and I realized with complete clarity just how beautiful Maggie was.  Don’t get me wrong, I don’t bat for the other team.  But I see now why Maggie had belonged in that room with the elite Friday night.  I’ve known her all my life so maybe I’d taken her for granted.  Brent wasn’t using her.  Heck, he should be proud to have her as a girlfriend.

“Why are you staring?” I heard Maggie say from a distance.

My eyes focused on hers. “Oh, nothing. Lunch?” I asked.

She gave me a quick once over as if I had landed on Mars and come back.  But she didn’t question me further.  She just dived into her news about how wonderful Brent was.

In the last few days, I found I really liked Brent at least from her point of view.  Still chatting about nothing totally important from my perspective, Brent walked up behind us and put his huge arm around Maggie’s shoulder.  She giggled in surprise.  Gosh, we hadn’t even made it to the lunchroom yet but I felt as if I’d gag on anything I ate.  Watching them was sickening.  Then, I wondered if anyone felt that way about me and Luke.  I didn’t have to think long when Nina crossed my field of vision before disappearing in the cafeteria.

I was jarred back when I heard Brent’s voice.  “Hey babe,” he said to Maggie, then he nodded at me “Mercy.”

“Brent,” I said back in acknowledgement.  Suddenly, I felt like the third wheel and turn my head slightly to see Flynn standing to my right.  I jumped again putting a hand to my chest heaving in breaths.  I want to curse at him but decide against.  Things had been calm between us and I didn’t want to do anything that would change that.

I saw in his eyes a storm that began to cloud over as he noticed my hand still at my chest. “Jumpy,” was all he said.

I gave him that famous head lift that says Yes without actually using the words because I was struck silence at the sight of him.  I didn’t expect him there or prepare to see him.  So I was caught off guard by just how good looking he really was.  I already knew this but it was really hard to look at him.  I adverted my eyes.  Last thing I needed was for Flynn to get his daily ego boost from me.

Gentle hands gathered on my shoulders and saved me.  A whisper in my ear came shortly after. “Hey beautiful.”

I don’t know why but I shot a quick glance at Flynn. I just caught him rolling his eyes and pulling away from our little group as we made our way into the cafeteria. I couldn’t help but smile.

“Back at you.” I said tilting my head back to look at Luke who towered over me.  I touched my hands to his enjoying this little moment.  His arms encircled me drawing me back nearly making me stumble before he let me go to take my hand.  I was laughing as we got into line right behind Nina.

I went still for no other reason than respect.  I didn’t want to laugh and have her feel bad.  I wasn’t sure I even liked the girl but somehow I knew if the shoe was on the other foot how I might feel.

Luke went quiet too but he didn’t let go of my hand right away when I tried to shake it off.  She never turned around.  She knew we were there.  Yet she chose to ignore us, which made me feel even worse.  I didn’t have an appetite anymore.  Preparing if things changed, I put fries and apple cranberry juice on my tray.

Weird, although it shouldn’t have been, was that we ended up following her to the usual senior table.  I moved to sit at the opposite end of where she sat.  Jay and Kathy were already sitting along with Paul, Amber, Amanda and Flynn who had been only a few more people ahead of us in line.

Maggie sat next to me and whispered even though everyone was talking and not paying us any real attention.  “What was that all about?” she said.

I shrugged. “Nothing,” I said back.  Because really, when you think about it, it was nothing but a kind gesture on my part that really didn’t need to be spoken.

I picked up a fry and dipped it into ketchup I’d poured from a little packet. I stole a glance in Nina’s direction somehow curious of her reaction to me.  Maybe I expected acknowledgement to my kindness.  But instead I was disregarded.  She never even looked at me.  That may have been a blessing.

Hand in hand after lunch, Luke walked me to class as he’d done each day this week.  The anticipation of the not kiss was killing me.  The hall was empty because we’d left lunch before the bell.  Maggie had winked at me on our way out, sure we were headed for a make out session.  I felt slammed against the lockers as the wind escaped my lungs yet he hadn’t touched me.  Leaning against the lockers, I had to stare up to look at him.  It was my eagerness that had cleared my breath.  His summer blue eyes seemed to glow now.  There was a fire in them I’d never seen.

We didn’t speak but just looked at each other in silent conversation.  I knew what my eyes were saying.  My mouth however wouldn’t dare to speak those words as long as my mind was in control.  Kiss me.  The heat that flared over my skin was electric.  I felt something begin to bubble inside me wanting to take over where I was afraid to go.

His hand came up as he took a step forward.  I was sure he’d read my mind.  I waited like this moment could last forever.  His head tilted forward as I patiently held expectantly.  When our skin met, the top of his head touched mine. His hand that I had forgotten about touched my chin.  I’d assumed he’d tilt my head so our mouths could reach each other. I wasn’t in a position to stop him because I didn’t wanted him too.

But instead his thumb brushed lightly over my bottom lip tracing it leaving a tingling sensation in its wake.  Yearning, I felt alive.  I was certain I hadn’t felt this way before. He pulled back, but I held on to his hand.  I wasn’t ready for him to go and he’d cheated me from his airbrush kiss.  He looked at me when I didn’t let go of his hand.  Still I didn’t speak.  I let my eyes tell my story hoping he could read it.

His words came out rough yet quiet, “If you don’t let me go, I will kiss you.”  His eyes were like meteors ready to make a landing as flecks of gold danced in them.

Still I held on to his hand. I wanted to say, Kiss me and don’t hold back. Instead I caught a glimmer of silver behind him.  Looking away from his captured gaze, I saw the lingering Homecoming Dance poster from an event that transpired over two weeks ago.  I hadn’t gone.  No date.  Maggie hadn’t been dating anyone either.  In a show of sister solidarity she stayed home with me and we watch a couple of old movies.   Sixteen Candles and The Breakfast Club were the main event while we ate popcorn and ice cream.  Not at the same time but over the course of the night.

It was then that it hit me.  Like a crashing wave, I remembered the rumors that followed.  Luke and Nina had broken up around that time.  I wasn’t clear on the timing.  But I wondered if they had broken up before or after the dance maybe even during the dance.  Those thoughts sobered me up and I let go.

He searched my eyes but didn’t ask.  “I’ll wait until you’re ready,” he said before walking away from me into the sea of students in the hall.  I felt like a total prude.  But If prude would keep him safe, I would embrace it.

I looked around dazed for a moment wondering when the bell had rung because I hadn’t heard it.  How could I have missed the bell?  And where had all the students come from suddenly appearing out of thin air?  There was an unheard crackle in the air that made me look up.  Like slow motion Nina whom I shared no classes with walked by.  It was with painful slow and steady steps, she seemed to cross my path of vision.  She looked at me not with quiet eyes to accept my little gift in the lunch line but rather a burning hate, I had to turn from.

I moved quickly inside my class room somehow ashamed.  It wasn’t my fault they broke up.   I had to keep telling myself that waiting for class to begin.  But the truth was, I couldn’t have a boyfriend until I could control the life stealing leech inside me.  And well, Luke deserved a girlfriend who could kiss him.  He’d said he’d wait for me.  But honestly when a high school boy says that to his girlfriend, he usually means he would wait until the girl was ready to have sex, not a kiss.

The bell rung and class began.  I tried to pay attention not wanting to give into the thoughts that could ruin my relationship with Luke.  I pushed all that aside and took notes on whatever my teacher had been saying.

Brent and Luke met Maggie and me at our lockers after school another tradition that began this week.  They’d walk us to Maggie’s car and we’d chat for a bit before they’d head to football practice.  Flynn hadn’t come along anymore this week which meant things were certainly looking up.

Luke again had his arms around me pulling my back tight against his chest.  His chin was pressed to my hair and I reveled in our closeness. The November air was chillier now so I’d worn Luke’s jacket.  Although it was big on me, that was the point.  It was a fashion statement for those girls lucky to have one.  Those jackets were worn by the lucky with pride.

“It shot out like gun,” Brent was saying.

“It was so gross, I nearly barfed myself,” Maggie added.

Luke was laughing and I’d missed most of what Brent had been saying, but I could guess that someone had thrown up in school.  I was clear on that, but hadn’t heard the full story.  However, I didn’t want to let them in on the fact that I hadn’t been listening.

“Glad we missed that,” Luke said still laughing.

“I wished I did,” Maggie said eyeing me suspiciously but not saying anything.  She would ask me later where my mind had gone, I was sure.

Brent turned to Maggie and gazed in her eyes like she was the last girl on earth.  It was an amazing look.  One that I thought I might have seen on Paul’s face.  Brent couldn’t have cared less that we stood watching not three feet away.

“See ya, babe,” he said before scooping her up and kissing her off her feet.  She squealed in delight and I was truly happy for her.

Luke kissed the top of my head and turned me to look in my eyes.  He gathered in a deep breath.  I bit my lower lip hoping at least for the airbrush kiss. He smiled at me and gave the barest of chuckles so light under his breath I barely caught it.  He had his tongue in his cheek before he said, “I’ll call you later tonight.”  Then he corrected himself. “Oh, your dinner is tonight.  Call me after.”  He let go of my hand which I hadn’t noticed he was holding because I hadn’t breathed waiting again for the kiss that never came.

Brent had set Maggie on her feet and caught up with Luke when Paul tapped me on my shoulder and I jumped again.  I wasn’t normally so jumpy but the news about the missing women only got grimmer these days.  The missing girl hadn’t been found but another dead girl had turned up.

“Crap, is everyone trying to give me a heart attack today.” I said.

“Sorry,” he said and laughed.  I looked at him again wondering what about today had my eyes so open to everything around me.  The sky was a gorgeous blue that reminded me of summer with only thin ribbons of white sparsely clouding the sky.  But it was chilly and Paul stood before his in only a blue Hollister tee and jeans with no jacket.  His lightly tanned arms were a contradiction to the season.  I looked up at his face to see the dark hair underneath his customary hat.  It was as if he couldn’t wait for school to be over to put it back on to frame the nerdy but super cute face that made him Paul.

Our eyes locked and I remembered our kiss like it was yesterday.  This is probably not a good thing.  I have a boyfriend now who was amazing.  And Paul had a girlfriend I actually approved of although I would never tell him so ever.  Something passed between us.

Maggie said to Paul, “Did you hear about what happened at lunch?”

“What?” he said, obviously he hadn’t.

“A freshman girl at lunch tossed her cookies on her boyfriend,” she began.

Like a magnet I couldn’t help the next few steps I took finding myself standing inches away from Paul.

“Her table was not too far from ours.” Maggie was saying.

I stood lifting on my toes to reach my hand to his hat.  I took it off revealing his hair molded to head in the shape of the inside of his cap.  His dark hair curled around the edges of the imprint of the hat now gone from his head.  His eyes went wide.

“Her boyfriend must have had a bull’s-eye on his shirt,” Maggie continued not paying attention to us.  She thoroughly enjoyed gossip and couldn’t be interrupted from her storytelling.

I threaded my fingers in his hair gently lifting it bringing it back to life.  His hand came to my waist to grab at the hat behind my back.  He had to move lower to reach because he was taller than me.  His decent lower was suddenly leading into something that could change everything between us.

Maggie who still hadn’t stopped talking said “And she threw up all over her boyfriend.”  She paused and looked at us one by one slowly finally getting what I was feeling.  “But both of you were MIA,” she said gradually still taking us in.

Paul’s hand dropped from my waist, head snapped up, and he took a step back.  So he’d felt the change too.  Maggie pointed at Paul, “You were MIA all of lunch. So was Amber,” she said with accusation.

Then she pointed at me, “And you left lunch early with Luke.”  Her eyes peered at me as if a realization came to light.

Paul eyes narrowed a moment but softened when Maggie turned her attention back to him and then to me again.

“I swear if you too weren’t dating other people I would think that you guys finally got back together.”  She threw up her arms in exasperation. “But I know that neither of you would hurt Amber or Luke.”  Her words were sharp in warning.  She looked at us again before speaking. “Whatever?” she said as if she was through with both of us and strode to the other side of her car getting in.

When the engine ignited to life, Paul finally spoke.  I’d been looking away thinking.  If Maggie saw what she saw, did Paul really have a torch for me that burned as bright as mine had?  What would I do about it if it were true?  And who else could see the light that burned between us.  “Can we talk?” he asked.

Before I could answer, Maggie rolled down the passenger side window. “You coming Eme.”

I smiled at Paul feeling flirtatious. I mouthed call me holding my hand up mimicking a phone to my ear.  His eye flared to life and I realized I shouldn’t have done that.  Maggie was right.  There were two people involved now.  It was way past too late for Paul and I.  But something inside me stirred and wanted Paul in spite of it all.  I turned and got in the car leaving Paul standing there in confusion.

It wasn’t until we gotten far away that I understood what had just happened.  I wasn’t a cheater.  I’d never cheat.  Well technically I never had a boyfriend except of the few weeks with Paul until that fateful kiss.

I felt the succubus recede into the shadows of my mind and knew it had taken over.  I’d geared it up with thoughts and wants from Luke.  Paul came and in my surprise it had taken over.  Once it was gone it was so clear to see that. I would never have done those things or at least in the manner they had been done.  Paul too had felt it.  He was planning on kissing me.  I knew it was whatever magnetic force the succubus had over its victim.  Paul would never cheat on Amber even if he was interested in someone else.  He was the kind of guy who would end things first.  He’d give a cooling off period before jumping into the next relationship.

“What the hell was that, Eme.” Maggie said stringing out each word as burst of fun fire.

“Nothing,” I said because I couldn’t think of an excuse.

“There was so much more than nothing in what happened.  I thought you were into Luke?”

“No, it’s not that,” I protested holding my head and leaning against the window hating to lie to her.

“What is it?  Because I know you and there is no way you would do that to Luke or even Paul.”

“You’re right. I don’t know what got into me, alacrity maybe,” I muttered the last part.

“Alacrity,” she said exasperatedly. “I’m ignoring that.  I’m not going to be drawn into your obsession with words,” she said on a huff.  “But really, you’ve never gotten over him have you?” she said as if she said Ah Ha, got you.

I didn’t answer soon enough before she continued on.

“So that’s why you haven’t dated all this time,” she accused.

What could I say?  I couldn’t tell her the truth even though I wanted to.

“You need to make up your mind before things go too far with Luke,” she continued.

“Don’t worry, Maggs.  I’m not getting together with Paul.  We’re just friends.”

She turned to glare at me. “Friends my ass!  Lie to someone who doesn’t know you.”

I closed my eyes.  Maggie knew me in ways better than I knew myself, but there were secrets that I couldn’t explain.  “Drop it ok, I have enough to think about with this dinner.”

She started watching the road and became quiet.  I thought maybe the conversation was over.  It didn’t last long as much as I’d hoped.

“I like Luke, Eme and Paul’s like my best friend too.  You have to choose,” she said firmly.

“I’ve already chosen,” I said trying to sound as though I sure. “I want Luke.”

She seemed to let go a breath she’d been holding onto. “Then you need to tell Paul.”

That comment threw me off.  Why would I need to tell Paul anything?  He had a girlfriend. “Why?” I said.

“I saw it in his eyes too.  Hell, I’ve seen it there for years.”

I tighten my eyes feeling the torch burn for Paul that I had since our kiss. “Drop it ok?” I asked pitifully.  I can’t think about this right now.  Everything was going great with Luke and me.  Heck, tonight I would find the secret to how I can kiss without killing.  It was that plan, I’d been holding on to.  But a flittering thought passed through my brain. With that secret I could kiss anyone.  My heart felt torn in two.  Although it had only been nearly a week since Luke and I became Luke and I the couple, in high school years a week felt like an eternity.

Maggie turned up the radio and we drove in silence the rest of the way.  I’d wanted to talk to her about my dinner but it seemed almost as if she were mad at me.

When I got out of the car her departure was awkward at best.  She’d given me a half smile as if it pained her to do so and an empty good luck when I mentioned the dinner.  Then she was gone and I felt as though I lost my best friend.

Chapter Twelve

pulchritude (n.) physical beauty

Wind whipped was the word to describe how I looked through the mirror in my hallway after I dumped my backpack and Luke’s jacket on the chair in the living room.  I was confused by my feelings over Paul and the darkness that lived inside of me.  I was trying to understand the person I was becoming when there was a knock at the door.

Dropping my hands to my sides I walked casually to the door.  I opened it thinking Flynn had made a return to stalking me.  I was wrong.  Paul stood there shifting in his stance.  He looked a bit nervous and I thought about what Maggie said.

“You coming in or what?” I said, cheerfully trying to keep things light.

He stopped shifting and looked at me.  I mean he really looked at me as if he was trying to see inside my soul.  Uncomfortable, I took a couple steps back opening the door wider. When he crossed over the doorsill, I closed the door.  I was about to move around him to head to the kitchen when he caught my arm stopping my forward progress.

“Mercy, we need to talk about earlier,” he said.

My heart sank.  I didn’t want to have this conversation.  If he asked the question as I thought he might, I’d have to lie.  Up until now our friendship had been pure.  I’d never lied to him.  I had to lie to Maggie and I didn’t want to do the same with Paul.

I smiled up at him cheerfully and snatched his hat off his head again.  But this time, I rubbed the top of his head like you would a puppy.  “What about silly?” I said.

Distracted, he released my arm and I skipped away with his hat like a little kid playing keep away.  In the kitchen I opened the refrigerator getting what I needed to start the marinade.  I was making dinner tonight for my mom’s mysterious guests.  I should have been nervous to meet my mother’s beau and son, but there were so many other things going on like the boy in my house.  I’d placed his hat on one of the bar stools that faced were I’d be preparing the meal.

He walked in and put his hat back on before sitting down.  I knew I only had moments before he would brooch the topic I wanted desperately to stay away from.  In my uneasiness, I didn’t think about the love monster that showed it ugly face earlier.  Maybe that was a good thing because it hadn’t surface yet.

“Where’s Amber?  I was sure you’d be spending your afternoon off with her,” I said all grins in a purely plutonic friendship way.  The expression was strained and I was sure he’d see through it.

When he spoke, he stumbled a bit which was a reminder of the boy that I’d met a little over two years ago.  That boy had matured into a young man so dashing and confident.  No longer did he drive his parent’s car.  But thanks to hard work and a help from his parents, he drove a black Mustang with white stripes slicked down the sides with the letters spelling the car’s name blazing across it.  “She’s at practice I guess,” he said still taken aback by my question I assumed.

I needed to keep him off balance so I chided him some more. “Can’t keep up with your girlfriend, can you? I know that Luke is at practice doing what he does best,” I said with a sigh and continue working to prepare dinner.  A smile was plastered to my face. I was certain my face would hurt when I stopped.

“About that,” he began. “You think it’s a good idea to be going out with Luke?”

I stopped myself because now I was a bit pissed. Can’t I have a life? I took a breath to calm myself.  Now wasn’t the time to bitch.  So instead I said with the grin still on my face which was getting a bit painful now, “Don’t worry.  He hasn’t kissed me, but I plan to rectify that tomorrow.”

Well, maybe I shouldn’t have added that last bit, but it just came out.  “Has something changed or is that a still bit dangerous?” he asked.

I turn to him now.  Maybe this will warn him off for good.  I really didn’t want to hurt him.  He was my best friend but I had to get us back on track.

“I’ve made up my mind to get mom to teach me what I need to know, tonight.”  I regretted the words while I watched him look away briefly as if I slapped him.

See during the ride home with Maggie in certain silence, I had time to think.  Never had I forced the issue with my mom after kissing Paul.  I hadn’t ever really pressured her to tell me what I needed to know, damn the cost.  I’d simply accepted what she said and let Paul drift out of my life in that way.  He’d waited a while now that I thought about it before he dated someone else.  Maybe he was upset I hadn’t done what I was about to do for Luke for him.

But I hadn’t and I wasn’t sure why I didn’t or why now I planned to.  The truth was I wasn’t sure whether I was doing this for Luke or was I doing this because I was fed up with sitting back and watching everyone else live.

“I’m glad to hear it. You deserve to be happy,” he said.  He too wore a smile on his face but it almost seemed forced.  I just hoped with those words, we were back on track.

My mom came trudging into the house.  It’s almost comically how almost every time a boy came over these days, my mom comes through the door with groceries.  The only exception had been Luke’s visit.  I couldn’t help but smile thinking about it.

“Hey Paul,” my mom said.  He helped her with her bags and muttered a reply to her I didn’t hear.

“The steaks are in this bag,” she said to me handing it to me.

“You staying for dinner?” she asked Paul.

I turned to give her the evil eye.  For her, that had been a normal question because Paul often ate dinner with us.  But with his job and new girlfriend he hadn’t been around much lately.  As much as it might have been nice to have an ally for dinner, I knew things weren’t quite resolved as much as I hoped with him.

“No, I can’t tonight.  I’m actually leaving to go pick up my girlfriend from practice,” he said while looking at me.  Actually I wasn’t looking at him but tending to the steaks.  I did catch a view of him out of my peripheral vision.

“She’s got more pulchritude than us, “ I teased.

My mom narrowed her eyes at me.  “Is that another one of your SAT words?”

I grinned.  She rolled her eyes.  Paul just ignored me.

“Another night,” she said exiting the kitchen and then headed upstairs.

He stood and I continued to work trying not to let it bother me that he was leaving.

“See ya, Merce.”

“Yeah, see ya.” I said not looking up.  In fact, by this time, I had my back to him.  When I heard the front door close, I stopped and took long deep breaths.  Mission accomplished but it hurt.  Still, I did love him.  I popped in my ipod in the sound system dock and rocked some upbeat tunes.  I’d sung along to distract my thoughts while I prepared dinner.  Halfway through I nearly moved past all that’s happened.

Everything was in various stages of preparation waiting for the exact time to finish, so dinner came out hot when everyone was ready to eat.  I headed upstairs to my room to get ready.

I showered and changed.  In my bathroom mirror, I put on a bit more makeup than usual to take me from girly to sophisticated.  I put on a top I could have worn out to a club if I went clubbing and paired it with my usual look of jeans.  I had that not too overly dressed look.

I was in the last stage of cooking when the doorbell rung.  My mom was still upstairs no doubt planning to make an entrance, so I headed to the door seriously curious about the man that would be on the other side.

I wondered what the man that caught my mother’s attention looked like.  With no further ado, I opened the door and was stuck by the pulchritude of men that stood in the doorway.

Chapter Thirteen

vestige (n.) a mark or trace of something lost or vanished

David McCallister stood like a hulking presence just outside the door frame.  The man was tall.  I had to look up to meet his warm deep brown eyes that match his dark chocolate brown hair.  His smile was warm and inviting and I wished I could have returned the sentiment. I recognized him instantly from the cover of a hospital newsletter my mom brought home.  In the picture, he’d worn a tailored suit.  Tonight he was causal in a fleece pullover perfect for the cold night with jeans. Even casual he was still refined.  Based on the newsletter cover he was currently the CEO of a local pharmaceutical company and sat on the board of the hospital my mom works at.  Everything made sense all at once.  My ignorance was simply a vestige now.

“Hi,” I said casually. “Please come in,” I said as graciously as I could even though I didn’t quite feel it.

“Good Evening, Mercy,” David said, holding out his hand.  His face was still inviting and I knew he was sincere.

“And to you,” I replied taking his hand in a quick firm shake.  “My mom should be down shortly.”  I wished she would hurry.  I wasn’t sure how long I could keep up the pretence.

He was an attractive man.  If he’d been a teacher at my school all the girls would have a crush on him.  Was there a term for the reverse of jail bait or cougar?  That surely would be the term for all the teenage girls that would fawn all over him.  His picture hadn’t done him justice at all.  His son looked a lot like him and it was a wonder I didn’t put it together before now.  He walked through the door with sure steps.  He had a quiet confidence about him.  His son who followed him could surely learn from the father.

“Hey Mercy,” said the son with a grin full of teeth.

“Flynn,” I said through clenched teeth.

“You look really good tonight.” Flynn said eying me up and down in a slow sweep.  I just rolled my eyes wishing I hadn’t dressed up for this.

“David,” a voice like honey came from behind me.  I’d never heard my mother use that tone before.  It was dripping sweet and my stomach rolled.  Who likes to know their parents have lives?  Not me especially since I wasn’t supposed to.  My mom made her entrance down the staircase.

“Julie, you look amazing,” David replied.  Flynn eyed my mother with approval.  I turned from him to see my mother’s smile shine bright.  She wore a pale yellow baby doll top more summer like than nearly winter with skinny jeans.  Her short blond hair was styled slightly spiky on top.  The light makeup she wore enhanced her beauty and I secretly wished I looked more like her.

A whisper from behind me confirmed what I knew. “You’re mom is hot,” Flynn whispered.  I turned back and narrowed my eyes.

“If you will excuse me, I have to check on dinner,” I said while closing the door behind Flynn and ignoring him.  I walked by my mom and David, with a smile so familiar from this afternoon with Paul, it was automatic and very fake.  Once I got in the kitchen I began with the finally preparations for dinner.  My mom came in behind me.

“So what do you think?” she asked, all cheerful as if I should be happy about this situation.

I could have given her total grief but instead I answered truthfully.  “He’s good looking, but a little advanced warning would have gone a long way, Mom,” I said giving her a lift of my eye brow.  Now was not the time, but letting her know I was displeased would go a long way towards my plan after dinner.

Flynn came in and my mom handed him a Coke and headed out with two glasses and a bottle of wine.  I kept focused on dinner and tried to ignore my company in the kitchen.

“I heard you were a good cook,” Flynn said.  I sat up from where I was looking in the oven at my baby potatoes roasting under the broiler.

“You knew and never said anything,” I said, still gritting my teeth and trying to keep my voice low.  I was pissed and decided to take it out on an easy target.

“I knew something was different with you on Friday and tried to talk to you about it, but you never gave me the chance.”  I turned away knowing he was right, but I was still angry anyway.

“I only found out on Monday night when my dad told me about you, your mother and dinner plans for tonight.”

So that answered one question.  I wondered why he had let up on bothering me so dramatically. Then it hit me that his dad told him but my mother hadn’t told me.  Why, was the only question I could think of?  At every turn she seemed to hide things from me.  I couldn’t help but wonder what else she was hiding.  Dinner couldn’t end soon enough because mom and I needed to talk.

Flynn stayed in the kitchen, but I ignored him.  Steaks were delicate.  If you cooked them to long they would be awful.  If you under cooked them they could be dangerous.  I steamed fresh green beans blanching them so to preserve their rich green color just when dinner was ready to be served.

We were sitting around the dining room table well into dinner when David decided to make a toast.  Politely I lifted my glass with everyone else.  “I want to make a toast to our amazing chef, Mercy,” he began.  Everyone lifted a glass and murmured their agreements.

“I like to make a second toast to our beautiful host, Julie,” he said.  Again we lifted our glasses.

David seemed to be on a roll because he continued speaking.  “I also have question for Julie,” he said.

He got up and moved towards her.  I looked over at Flynn, who didn’t seem to be at all surprised by what was going to happen next.  Looking toward me he smiled.  My mouth dropped because I feared what was coming.  Neither of them caught my gaping mouth because they only had eyes for each other now.  His words seemed to jumble in my ear. It didn’t matter because him on one bended knee could only mean one thing.  My world was spinning and I could have fainted.

A rush of questions crossed my brain because everything seemed to be happening so fast.  How long had they been dating that this was the next step? Why hadn’t she told me about him?  Absolutely nothing.

Faintly like background noise, I heard her say yes.  That is when the room really began to spin.  I focused hard not to say or do anything.  I needed to get some air.

A phone chirped and I looked up to see Flynn pull his cell out of his pocket.  He checked the display before getting up and excusing himself from the table.

A flash of something sparkly caught the corner of my eye. I turned in time to see my mother grinning ear to ear.  Never had I seen her so happy.  I felt ashamed at my own discomfort.

“I’ll just go get desert,” she said.  When she left the room I realized that should have been me leaving so I could just breathe.  Nonetheless, I didn’t think I could move anyway.  My world had changed with a few simple words right before my eyes and I had no say in the matter.  When my mom left the room, I took a deep swallow on nothing trying to pull it together.  Clearly, this was shock I was feeling.  Shattering my mediation for control, David spoke.

“Mercy, I understand this is a shock for you.” That was an understatement. “But I want you to know I’m not trying to ruin your life or step in as your father,” he began and pull a tiny tube of something out of his pocket and reach it to set it in front of me.  The tube was indistinct.  I wasn’t sure what to make of it.

“I just hope in time we can be friends,” he said.   He looked at me as if he was expecting a reaction, but I had none.  So he continued speaking.

“Flynn told me about Friday,” he said.  I think at this point I began to turn every shade of red known to man because I felt the heat rise in my face.

He continued the conversation as if I’d really been participating.  I could tell he could feel my discomfort.  “I’ve been working on a barrier, a kind of protection from people like us for the normal person.”

Now I was suddenly interested and picked up the tube which reminded me of Chapstick.  I turned it around and around in my hand.  The white tube was in descript and generic with no writing on it.  “It only last as long as it is not absorbed or wiped off the skin.  I’m not advocating teen sex not that this would provide any protection from that obviously.  But certainly in the situation you found yourself in Friday, you might not have felt so out of place,” he said carefully.

I looked up at him for the first time in this conversation.  His face was warm and inviting.  There was a kindness about him that made me feel so comfortable.  I looked back at the tiny tube that might be my chance at freedom.  I couldn’t believe he was this cool.

“I’ll leave it up to you whether you share that with your mother,” he said pointing at the tube still in my hand.  “We can keep this between us if you like. I don’t necessarily agree with your mother’s choices in your lack of teaching but she’s your mother.  I have to respect that.  I just hope this gives you a little protection.”

I gave him a half smile.  There was so much to think about.  I curled my fingers around the tube and slid my hand slowly from the table.   Underneath, I slipped my lifeline in my pocket.  “Thanks,” I said weakly.  I did mean it.  I think I really like David.

My mother came in soon after with the lemon custard dessert I made.  Flynn who had an unsure expression on his face followed shortly after.  I really looked at him while he was distracted.  He was so very attractive like his father.  However, he lacked the warmth that so radiated from David.  Had I missed judged Flynn based on the grapevine at school.  My eyes refocused and I saw Flynn clearly again not looking through him at my thoughts.  He was looking at me with a sly expression and a curved smile.  Nope, I was very sure I hadn’t misjudged him at all.  I looked away at the wall while my mother dished out dessert.

Over custard, I got my second surprise.  David announced that we would all spend Thanksgiving break which was in a few weeks at his Lake house in northern Maryland.  Dazed by all the events, I later excused myself from the table.  My mom did the honor of cleaning up since I did all cooking.  I headed into the family room.  Mom and David would probably have after dinner coffee elsewhere in the house.  I bided my time knowing Flynn would be following me in there soon.  I braced myself not to be rude.  I grabbed the remote to turn on the television in order to stifle any potential conversation.

I sat, no rather I plopped down on the sofa with one leg tucked under me.  Suddenly, I wasn’t sure about my plan.  Too much had happened in a short time.  When Flynn walked in and sat right beside me even though there was a couple more feet of sofa, I didn’t have the energy to protest.

“You looked surprised by everything,” he said.

“You think,” I said sarcastically.  I managed not to roll my eyes remembering my vow not to be rude.

“Your mom doesn’t tell you much, does she?” he asked.

I looked at him suddenly angry.  I wanted to say, I don’t have a great dad like yours?  Instead I snarled, “What does that have to do with anything?”  Well, so much for not being rude.

He didn’t miss a beat and just looked as gorgeous as ever with a self righteous smirk on his face.  “For one, you didn’t know about my dad.  Therefore you don’t know how long they’ve been dating,” he said confidently.  “I have a feeling you know next to nothing about who you are and how to control it.”

Since when did he become so intuitive?  I couldn’t argue so I turned my attention to the television.  I was scrolling through the onscreen guide for something to watch when he said something that made me freeze.

“I bet Paul was your first kiss.”  My shock had to be written on my face.  For a second, I’d actually stopped breathing.

He laughed then said, “That explains why you haven’t dated anyone at school since him.  We wondered.”

I couldn’t believe it.  Why would Flynn know I dated Paul or when?  Why would he even care?  But more importantly who had he meant when he said we?  Was he referring to Luke or maybe his dad because based on his dad’s talk with me, Flynn had spoken to him about us kissing.

“Why’d you tell your dad about us?”  I did want to know. Their relationship had to be tight.

He smiled, “So there’s an us now?”

I lifted my eyes heavenward.  “You know what I mean.”

“I knew he was dating someone.  I hadn’t bothered to get more details about her mystery daughter until he sprang it on me Monday after practice.  Then I told him of my suspicion of a girl I kissed from school.”

My mind was rolling with questions that I lacked the knowledge about.  Flynn obviously had some answers that I did not.  So I asked, “How come you can go around kissing every girl in school and not kill anyone?” Maybe I didn’t need to talk to my mom after all.

“I knew you didn’t know anything,” he said still grinning and frankly I wanted to wipe the smile off his face but not before I got some answers.

“That’s beside the point.” I retorted.  My hands were at my sides because I wanted to bolt from the room.  He was making fun of me and seriously I felt like a fool.  My mom made it seem like there was no way to control what I was, but apparently Flynn knew how to do it.

He must have recognized my preflight plan and stopped teasing. “I could teach you.”  His words had been soft and understanding.  I really looked at him now.  He could be my savior and key to my destiny.  Well, maybe not all that.  His face was beautifully angelic but he was more like the devil reincarnated and I had to remember that.

I relaxed prematurely. “How?”

“Well, I have to show you as part of the instruction,” he said.   Of course he did.  I looked into his steel blue eyes to find the truth, but I could see nothing but the darkest depths of the ocean in them.

“And how would I explain that to Luke?”  Once the words were out of my mouth, I wondered for the first time tonight if Luke knew what Flynn was and maybe even me.  It could explain why he was ever so careful and understanding about kissing me. However, he still wanted to.  I saw that in looks he gave me.  I didn’t think he had a death wish.  But then again maybe he thought I could control it like Flynn.

“This could be our secret,” he said and the sly grin began to return to his face.  See there was the devil that hid itself behind the boyish good looks he had.

“You’re an ass.” I said.  His grin faded but he didn’t seem angry.

He slipped back to his serious face.  “Did you find out what you were when you kissed Paul?”

I wondered how the conversation circled back.  The word tumbled from my mouth as if I’d been dying to tell someone my secrets. “Yes.”

“You didn’t kill him.  So, how’d you stop yourself?” he asked.  As if he’d given me truth serum I found myself explaining the story to him.

“Classic,” he said through a snicker.  “Your mom caught you and saved Paul. That’s one for the books.”

“It’s not funny,” I said.  There was nothing funny about it, at least from my point of view.  Like tonight, that day marked a change in my existence.  It was a pivotal moment in time for me like no other.

“She didn’t tell you about anything then.”

I brooded. “No,” I said coolly.

“I see,” he said as if that explained everything.  “Your father’s human,” he said.  I wasn’t sure if that was a statement or a question, but answered all the same.

“Yes, why is that relevant?” I asked.

“It means you don’t need human life to survive,” he said, staring at me.  I didn’t say anything but something in his expression made me pause.

He spoke again with knowledge and truth that a parent would have given.  “You’re more human than succubus.  Which means your mom really didn’t have to tell you at an early age what you were.”

“And you need it don’t you?” I said slowly.  Comprehension settled in.  It made perfect sense now why he was with so many girls.

“Yes,” he said still looking at me.  His eyes held unspoken words.

“You mom was succubus?” I asked.  Again I spoke slowly, not sure how he would react to this question.

“Yes,” he said, again not elaborating.  His tone had changed and that one word spoke years of pain.

“What happened to her?” I dared to ask.  He had answered my previous questions.

“She gave her life for me to be born,” he began. Shockingly, he proceeded to explain everything about conception and birth for our race.  Apparently full demons coupled together can’t procreate. But half demons can.  A succubus or incubus fetus who needs life force will feed on the mother until it results in the mother’s death or its birth.  He told me it was a choice the mother makes knowing it was likely she wouldn’t survive.  However in my case because my father was human, I wouldn’t have needed the life force in my mother’s womb.  Therefore she survived pregnancy.  Oddly enough, I felt comforted by that.  It must be hard for Flynn to know he killed his mother.

It was quiet for several minutes after he finished.  What was I suppose to say? I wasn’t sure sorry was appropriate.  But Flynn being Flynn broke the silence.

“So, I could teach you some control,” he said.  This time there wasn’t a hint of a smile.

I had no hesitation this time.  I wanted to know.  I was about to tell him yes when his father walked in.

“You ready?” he said then looked at Flynn’s hand.

His finger was drawing a pattern on the back of my hand and I hadn’t noticed.  How strange was that?  I hadn’t known when he started but when he stopped I missed the contact.

“Sure,” he said getting up.  He turned back to me once he got to the door and winked.   That was the Flynn everybody knew and loved.  But I like the other Flynn that I’d seen tonight, the one that seemed genuinely concerned and helpful.  Was that all a lie?  Could I trust him?

“See ya tomorrow,” he said and he exited the room with all the promise of my freedom from my succubus bond.  I blinked and nodded my head, speechless.

Armed with my tube of succubus barrier and Flynn, my ace in the hole, I decided not to confront my mother.  I needed to think about everything.  First however, I needed to make a call.

Upstairs in my room, I checked my phone.  I had a couple of text from Maggie desperate to find out the details of the dinner.  I also had a text from Luke asking me to call him.  I hadn’t asked Flynn about Luke.  I don’t know if I was afraid to ask or afraid to know, but I didn’t dial Luke.   Instead, I called Paul.  I don’t know why considering our afternoon awkwardness but instinctively he was who I wanted to talk to.

I got his voicemail and left a simple message. “Call me, ok?”  I didn’t text him because I wanted him to hear the sorry in my tone.  I needed him to know without me saying it, that I was sorry.  I put my phone down.

I wasn’t in the mood to call Maggie.  She was still riding high on a new relationship.  I needed someone to comfort me.  She didn’t know my secrets.  For her, Flynn my soon to be stepbrother scandal would amount in a tirade of what a scoundrel he was.  But for me, right now, I needed to talk about what it meant for there to be another like me in my school.  I would fill her in on the scandal in the morning.

As for Luke, I just didn’t know what to say.  I was being a coward.  So I texted him that I would see him tomorrow.  Flynn would do the honors and tell him for sure, if he hadn’t already.  That was what best friends were for, right?  But then again isn’t that what girlfriends are for.  Was I his officially his girlfriend?  I wore his jacket but had we actually formally said those words.  Was a formal declaration of such things proper procedure?  Who was I to know.  I’d never ask Maggie how she became a couple with whoever was the favor of the month.

I was tired and couldn’t think.  My text to Luke was a copout, but I just couldn’t.  I needed to see his face when I talked to him.  I needed to know.  I held the tube in my hand and made plans for tomorrow.  Depending on his look, this little tube held promises.

Chapter Fourteen

undulate (v.) to move in waves

On the ride to school, I’d given Maggie the highlights of the evening only omitting one aspect, the supernatural part of the story therefore including the tube of my sovereignty.  In her signature green sweater. Maggie like no one else looked amazing.  The color brought out the forest green of her eyes.  They twinkled as she questioned every detail.

“So will you be moving into their incredible house?” she asked.

I hadn’t thought about that. “Not sure,” I said.  With everything that transpired, I forgotten that Maggie had seemed angry with me yesterday about Paul and Luke.

I felt like I needed to make amends and changed the conversation.  “Maggs, Paul stopped by yesterday after you left.”

She gave me a quick glance and although her smile was gone she didn’t seem mad.  “I know, I talked to him,” she said.  Her bubbly tone was gone but there wasn’t any tension in her words.

“I straightened things out,” I said quickly.

“I know and I’m sorry I doubted you,” she said sincerely.

We pulled into the school parking lot.  Maggie seemed as if she knew exactly where she was going instead of searching for a spot.  We came down a row with a group of guys standing in an open spot.  I could make out some of the figures such as Brent, Luke, and Flynn wearing winter jackets in the cold fall air.  I saw only one guy in the distance with his letterman jacket on announcing to all girls he was available.  When the guys moved out of the spot, Maggie pulled in.  It was then I had my ‘duh’ moment.  Brent had saved her this spot.

Through the windshield, I did something so foreign to me.  I sought out Flynn’s face.  I wanted to see if there were unspoken answers in them.  Our eyes met for just a second and I saw nothing.  Instead he turned and began to walk several spot up to where Paul and a group of cheerleaders stood in their uniform.  Today was spirit day, yippee I thought sourly.  Flynn’s back was to me as he stood with Paul and the rest of the guys other than Brent and Luke.

Brent was strategically parked to our left and Luke’s car, which I just noticed, was on the right.  That made things easy.  Maggie hopped out the car in her short jean skirt and into the arms of Brent.  I had a quick moment to wonder what her brothers would do if they saw her now wrapped around a senior boy like a fruit roll up.  That was Maggie for you.  She put herself into every relationship one hundred percent.  Even I was surprised she’d still held her virginity unless of course she lied to me.  But I didn’t think so.  She liked to talk and that would be a secret she would have to tell me.

Thinking back, I remembered how hard it was for her to date last year with her brother a senior.  Her oldest brother had already gone to college.  But it was Liam who took pride in scaring off most of her admirers, but not all.  I thought about Doug, skater boy I liked to call him, for the first time in months.  I wondered what he thought of her new boyfriend.  Doug had been madly in love with Maggie.  She’d broken up with him simply because he wasn’t much of a challenge for her.  If only I could have been so lucky then to have that choice.

The thought was gone soon because I’d stepped out the car and was immediately folded into Luke arms.  The hug was super sweet and he smelled nice.  He smelled like a summer breeze and I wondered if whoever did laundry used those scented sheets in the dryer.  But it was his eyes I wanted to see.

The moment are gazes met, I saw it before the words exited his mouth.  “I heard,” he whispered as if others would over hear what he said.  Everyone including Maggie was too far away for his word if spoken normally could have been heard.

I tried to pull back but he held me there a few more moments. I’d put on the secret balm on my lips before we pulled into the parking lot adding a bit of gloss on top.  With two agenda’s on my mind when I came to school, I was determined to accomplish both.   Luke had taking care of the first with his eyes and the two words.  He wasn’t letting me do the other.

Finally, he let me out of the tight hug.  I didn’t move back and held on with both of my hands.  My backpack had me a bit off balance.  I looked into his sky blue eyes and saw nothing but warmth.  There was nothing more to say, instead I leaned into him and lifted onto my tip toes to kiss him full out.

I had no clue if this balm would work.  There were so many witnesses, but maybe that was the point.  If he turned blue, someone would notice in time to stop me.

Time seemed to stop when our lips met.  Before I closed my eyes, I saw a moment of hesitation and surprise flicker in his eyes.  Clearly, I was a novice at this.  I parted my lips, nearly breaking our kiss, taking in a deep breath, when he took the opportunity to explore my mouth.  His hands let go of mine and moved to the small of my back.  It was like I could feel the heat of his hands radiate through the heavy jacket material onto my bare skin.  Slowly one hand moved up to cup the back of my neck.  He tasted like a cool breeze which is what I needed against the radiating heat that flooded the rest of my body.

I pressed my body firmly against his.  I wanted to be closer to him like I hadn’t been close to anyone before.  His hand fingered through my hair and I knew that the balm was working.

His lips were soft, warm, and inviting.  I was truly kissing someone.  I owed Flynn’s Dad everything.  I would cook him a fabulous meal.  I would cater their wedding if they wanted me to.

Time slowed and I memorized everything.  The way his mouth molded to him and how he tasted minty fresh.  Yes, tasted. We were French kissing.  With no experience, I had no idea if I was doing it right. But I felt the beginning of a change in me.  Even though I was on my guard, actually  paying attention this time especially to the balm in case it didn’t work, I savored the moment.  I pulled back, breathing hard searching Luke’s face to make sure he was ok.  He completely looked fine if not a little astonished.

“Hi,” I said breathlessly with a grin.

He smiled back but with a question on his face. “Wow.”

Continuing to take charge, I took his hand from his side.  He was completely mystified but allowed me pull him forward.  This time, I led him towards the school.  That was when I noticed we had an audience.  Maggie and Brent both looked perplexed. That was strange.  They were king and queen of sucking face in public places.  I wasn’t sure where that look was coming from.  When I saw Paul who was standing next to Flynn, they shared an expression of bewilderment and disapproval.  I turned my head.  I wouldn’t let them spoil this moment for me.  It didn’t matter.  For me it felt like my first kiss and I couldn’t wait to do it again.

After I’d gone to my locker, Luke walked me to class.  Pulling me aside, he leaned in to kiss me again.  Even though I wanted nothing more than to do just that, I couldn’t press my luck.  I didn’t have a chance to reapply the balm.

“Not here,” I said with a smile.  It wasn’t as if we hadn’t had our PDAs (public displays of affection) in the halls before, but I couldn’t explain.  I guess he was content with my surprise kiss in the parking lot because he didn’t protest.  But when he leaned in again, I was sure he’d do it anyway.  Instead, he gave me his signature airbrush kiss. Who knew that it could light my fire more than the real thing did.

“Later,” he said with that one word filled with future promises.  I watched him walk away.  I couldn’t help it.  The view was absolutely wonderful.  I was starting to believe that Flynn wasn’t the hottest guy in school after all.

Just a bit early for class, I decided to stand where I was even after I watch him make his way down the hall.  My breath caught in my throat when the unexpected rough hand around my arm pulled me from the wall to drag around a corner.  The hand led me to a hallway that dead ended.

I looked up into the eyes of the owner of that hand.  I was taken by surprise to see who it belonged to.  “What the hell was that all about?”

I peered into the eyes of my capturer.  His eyes were stone cold and his face was tight.  It wasn’t an expression I’d ever seen on his face.  In a way it scared me.  “What are you talking about Paul?” I asked.

“That little demonstration outside,” he said voice tense and breathing heavily.

Indignant, I said, “I kissed my boyfriend. What’s the problem with that?”

His eye brows dropped and his mouth turned from the tight straight line to an upside down scowl. “He isn’t dead,” he said slowly in a low dangerous voice.

The words didn’t match the boy I knew.  “And you want him to be.  That doesn’t sound like the Paul I know,” I said softly and just as slow as if the pace of my words would make him understand better.

“I thought you couldn’t do that.  I thought,” he began but changed course. “You didn’t kiss me like that.”  His words were full of accusation and hurt.  Jealousy was a better word.  He was actually jealous.  Just when I thought I had things all straighten out, it seemed maybe I had opened Pandora’s Box yesterday after school.  I pulled the tube from my pocket and flash it in front of me like that alone would solve everything.

“Flynn’s dad is going to marry my mom.  He gave this to me from his company.  He said it would protect others from me.”  It was the condensed version, but the bell would ring soon. “I called you last night to tell you about it but you didn’t call back.”

He snatched the tube from my hand.  Inspecting it, he opened it and took a sniff.  I felt angry at his lack of trust. “I was busy,” he said answering my statement from before.

“Oh, sure it’s ok for you to be busy but not me. I should just sit around these last two years and wait for you.”   Oops, I shouldn’t have said that.  But the words were out and I couldn’t take them back.

“I waited for you,” he said, his voice gone low and soft.  Damn, he said it. The unspoken words were out.  Now what?  I shouldn’t have asked.

The next thing I knew he’d opened the top of the tube and spread the balm on his lips and pressed them to mine before I could comprehend what was happening.  It wasn’t a French kiss.  Which by the way I never understood why tongue exchange warranted the term French.  Still his mouth was firm on mine with his hands on either side of my face.  I can’t lie and say I felt nothing but before I could grasp what I did feel he’d pulled back and handed the tube back to me.

“It works,” he announced bristly and stalked off leaving me baffled with the turn of the events.  I almost felt like a slut.  I just kissed two boys in a matter of minutes.  But then again I hadn’t asked for the second.  God knows however, I didn’t stop it either.  Thankfully, the hall was dimly lit.  The only thing down this way was a janitor’s closet.  This hall was frequently used by students who wanted privacy.  Whoever designed the layout of the school hadn’t thought about the other uses of this alcove.   Nobody saw, I hoped.  When the bell rung, I pushed myself from the wall I nearly melded with.  I stepped out into the hall and into Flynn.  Things weren’t getting any better.

“Late, huh,” he said. “We should talk.”

His hand was wrapped around my forearm and frankly I was getting tired of being manhandled today.  “I need to get to class,” I said snatching my arm from his grasp.

“I bet you’ve never been late nor skipped before,” he said mockingly.

He was right I hadn’t. “No. And I’m going to rectify that now.”

“Don’t brush me off,” he said with his face impassive.  He was good with changing emotions fast.

I walked by him. “Call me tonight and we can talk.”  I grinned to myself because I knew what his response would be.

“I don’t have your number,” he said.

I turned around to deliver the crushing blow. “Get it from Luke,” I said coldly.  The smile was gone from my face before I turned to duct into class.  I hoped for mercy from my teacher because I’d never once been late.

Score two for me which wasn’t bad odds out of three.  But there was no happiness in my victories because I didn’t know what to do about Paul.  In class I found myself drifting again trying to put all the pieces together.  It should be simple. I love Paul and have for two years.  He obviously had some repressed feelings for me as well.  So we should just be together.  But then there was the matter of two very nice people we would hurt in the process, Amber and Luke.

One could say we were hurting them by having feelings behind their back.  But truth be known, I didn’t date Luke in spite of Paul.  I genuinely like Luke a lot.  I was sure that Paul dated Amber because she was really pretty and nice.  They were compatible.   So Paul and I should just let things be.  High school relationships don’t last forever excluding Jay and Kathy.  And they were not normal.  Being together since middle school was unheard of.  I kept flashing on Paul’s angry face and the revelation in his words.  Silently we’d both waited for each other this long.   He could have said something.  I wouldn’t take the blame for this.  I’d nearly killed him.  I couldn’t have asked him to be with me and not ever kissed like a normal couple.  Luke had taken the initiative and told me he’d wait.  Paul never said or tried to be anything more than my friend.  How dare he be mad at me?

When the bell rung signaling the end of class, I headed to my next period intently watching the faces not wanting to run into Flynn or Paul.  Gratefully I made it through to lunch without anymore incidents.  My hope not to see Nina worked.  I was certain my little display this morning had gotten back to her, if she hadn’t seen it firsthand.

At the beginning of the lunch period, I headed to my locker as usual to deposit all my books.   Maggie showed up moments later.  Before she could speak and dive into the latest gossip or let me know she and Paul had spoken, I beat her to the punch.

“Maggs, I’m in big trouble.” I said.  I recited the whole story again omitting any supernatural references like the tube of special lip balm.  I really needed to let her in on the secret.  So much more of the story would make more sense if she knew.

“Shit, I knew this would happen,” she said while leaning on her locker.

“What do you mean?” I asked.  I made a beeline for the girl’s bathroom.  Inside the drab gray fortress with faded coral colored stalls that tried to infuse the space with color and failed miserably, I stared into one of the industrial mirrors.  I needed to apply some balm.  I just had a feeling I might need it.  Better safe than sorry.

“I’ve seen the way the two of you have looked at each other a long time.  It was only a matter of time. What are you going to do?” She was looking at my reflection in the mirror as I applied one coat balm and one coat gloss.

I was never surer of my words then the ones that I said to her now. “I don’t want to lose my friendship with Paul.”

Her green eyes were fierce on mine. “What are you going to tell him because obviously that little display of yours this morning struck a nerve with him?”

I’d forgotten about the look on everyone’s face after my kiss with Luke.  “What was the problem with me kissing Luke this morning?  You’d think no one else kisses anyone on school grounds.”

“Eme, you looked like you were about to have sex in the parking lot.”  I wanted to say if that were true she and Brent mirrored that look at school on a regular basis.  But I kept that thought to myself because it would only start a fight.  My eyes grew big anyway because I thought more about how she and Brent looked.  It embarrassed me to think that I looked like that. “It did not,” I said.

She nodded understanding my question. “It did.”

I didn’t remember that at all.  Heck we’d only kissed a few seconds.  Our conversation continued with her impressions of my make out session while we headed to lunch a lot later than usual.  Looking around I felt safe because Paul and Amber were MIA.  This was true during lunch the last two weeks according to what Maggie said yesterday.  So I got in line only worried that Flynn might say something stupid.

When we finally made it to the senior table, Paul and Amber both sat there looking very unhappy.  Damn, they were here.  Maggie eyed me but said nothing.  I sat next to Luke as usual.  He was talking with Flynn I think about an interview on ESPN with some pro football player.  At least that’s all I got from the conversation as I nibbled on a dry cheeseburger.

Maggie sat across from me next to Brent who was listening intensely to whatever Flynn was saying.  I didn’t dare look at either end of the table.  Nina sat next to Amanda on one end and Paul and Amber were at the other.  I felt trapped.  If it was true, I looked as though I was sexing up Luke in the parking lot, the news would have gotten around.  I still wasn’t sure why I felt responsible for her feelings.

I’d drifted inward into my own thoughts when Luke leaned over and whispered in my ear. “Let’s get out of here.”

I smiled weakly.  Leaving with him now would only fuel the gossip train.  But I too wanted to be alone with him.  I did.  I also desperately wanted to be away from four nameless people at this table.  Getting away was more important than the rumors that would spread about me regardless of me slipping away from lunch early.

He stood and helped me up taking my tray of barely eaten food.  “Not hungry today?” he asked while I got to my feet.

I shook my head no not wanting to speak.  I thought we’d make a clean escape when Jay spoke up.  He said what I would have expected to come from Flynn’s mouth. “Are you two going to finish what you started this morning?”

The statement brought a round of laughter from the table and a rush of heat to my cheeks.  But I had to smile when Luke answered.  “There isn’t nearly enough time for that.  I’m not sure what Kathy’s used too.”

That brought another round of laughter. I did look at Kathy to see how the girl handled the spotlight.  She was red but not necessarily from embarrassment.

Brent and Maggie also got up but they didn’t follow us.  I heard Flynn mumble something but we were too far away.  I assumed it meant he too was leaving with Amanda.

A blast of cold air hit me as I followed Luke outside through the side doors.  I didn’t think we were headed to the bleachers.  It was a popular lunchtime spot but it was too cold.  Instead he took me to his car.  Maybe I could have been insulted that he presumed we needed this much privacy.  But frankly I wanted to be alone with him.  The kiss this morning had set my hormones on fire.  Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t sure I was ready to take the big plunge.  But a round of hot and heavy kissing was right up my alley.

Although we got in the back and he’d turned the car on along with the heater.  Did I mention it was cold out?  In minutes, we wouldn’t need heat from the car because I knew we’d create our own.  I thought we’d head into a make out session.  Instead it seemed he wanted to talk.  Darn.

“What’s up?  Did something happen last night?” he asked.  Was this was a normal reaction from a boyfriend who was promised so much from a kiss this morning?  Especially one that hung out with the likes of Flynn and maybe Brent.  But Luke was different and had been since the beginning.  I would expect this from Paul and actually had gotten the third degree from him.   So just never expected this from Luke.

Feeling like a chastised catholic school girl, I folded my hands in my lap smoothing out my jeans.  I looked at my fingers nervously moving them around.  He took my hands.  “No, nothing happened,” I said when I met his eyes again.

“You sure?” he asked, his face puzzled.

“No, why?” I said trying not to look as uneasy as I felt with these questions.

“Well, the shy girl who wanted to wait to kiss me proceeded to do so with vigor this morning in front of everyone.  Not that I minded, it was just unexpected?”

I saw in his eyes concern.  Something I wouldn’t have expected not too long ago from anyone other than Paul but Luke had proven to be the kind of guy that did care.  Again, I wanted to know what happened between him and Nina.

Desperate to change the subject I ignored his statement and honestly curious, I dived into my question.  “Did you go to homecoming with Nina?” I blurted out.

His face changed struck by my words no doubt.  He didn’t answer right away.  “You kissed me because of Nina. What did Flynn tell you last night?” he asked and I could tell he was irritated.

“He didn’t tell me anything.  I just wanted to know.”

Again he searched my face before he said, “Nina has nothing to do with what’s between you and me.”

He didn’t answer my question but there was no time for anything else when he laid his hand over mine.  It felt as though he lit a trail of gasoline up my arm and through my body.  It created a slow burned that was all for him.  My hands shot up to his head like a rocket and drew him to me.  We leaned back against the car door.  I kissed him with a fury that had been buried inside me since this morning.  The need to be close to him was strong.  My hands fisted through his soft curly hair and I couldn’t get him close enough to me to satisfy the hunger that seemed to grow.   My shirt must have lift slightly because I felt his hands against my naked flesh on the sides of my hips and tighten there.

We only took a five second breather here and there in between before our mouths fused back together.  His hands slowly rose under my shirt with his palms curled around the sides of me.  His hand grazed the bottom of my bra with my shirt rolling up with it when a sharp rap on the window shot us apart.  Moving back quickly, his head hit the top of the car as mine hit the window when he suddenly released me.

“Ouch,” I murmured with my hand on the back of my head.  The windows were fogged up, so we couldn’t see out.  I pulled my shirt back in place breathing hard and watched Luke look at me in utter fascination.

He moved between the seats and pushed the down button on the window I’d been leaning on.  Stay strands of my hair pulled down into the door with the window.  I made a small cry of pain when he looked back at me.

“Sorry,” he said rolling the window back all the way up so I could be released and move away from the window.  Once I was freed, he rolled down the front window instead.

Flynn dipped his head through and looked back at me shaking his head.   “What are the two of you doing?  Are you undulating in there?”

I looked up at Flynn in surprise.  He had a twinkle in his eye. “Yeah, I found your little phone app,” he said grinning at me.  Luke looked between us.  Then Flynn spoke before Luke could.  “The bell rang and I could tell you both missed that. Don’t be late,” he said jovially.

“Thanks,” Luke said.  He rolled up the window while Flynn’s head was still there.  Flynn moved quickly not to be caught.  I chuckled at that.  Served him right, but he did warn us.  Luke moved back and his hand moved to my hair.  I thought he might kiss me again when I realized he was just smoothing my hair.

“What was that about?” he asked.

“What?” I countered.

“Phone app?”

“Oh, I’m using a SAT word of the day app to built my vocab for the test.  I’ve been testing them out on Flynn to his dismay.  I guess he’s on to me.”

Luke laughed and shook his head.  “We should go,” he said.

I don’t know why but I felt as though maybe I disappointed him in some way.  “I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me. I’m not normally this way,” I spewed wanting to erase the look in his eyes.

“Maybe we should slow things down a bit. I don’t want you to regret anything we do.”  I closed my eyes grateful it seemed he wasn’t ready to dump me for acting like a complete slut.

“Maybe,” I said softly.  Honestly I didn’t want to slow things down.  What does that say about me?  But I kept that thought to myself.

Maybe he saw he rejection in my eyes because he leaned down and softly kissed me. I felt the fire inside return but fought it with amazing strength I didn’t think I had.  I was holding back wanting to enjoy the soft sweet kiss he gave me now instead of the hard eager one I’d initiated before.

It was over far too quickly.  He took my hand when we exited the car.  Par for course, he walked me to class and gave me the signature airbrush kiss in the hall.  Again the temptation to do more and not was far more exhilarating than the frantic kiss in the car.  Don’t get me wrong it certainly wasn’t more satisfying.  I couldn’t watch him walk away this time. The halls were filled with students finding their way to class.

Next period, when I got to my shared class I had with Maggie and Paul, I sat with nervous anticipation.  I had gotten their early hoping he’d be there.  We needed to talk.  But he didn’t show until right before the bell.  He slipped silently in his assigned seat behind me.  Maggie didn’t look at me but I knew what she was thinking.  Paul still looked unhappy and I was sure it was because of me.  I took no pleasure in that.  I felt slightly conflicted.

After class he bolted not saying a word to either of us.  Maggie and I left speechless heading to last period.  Avoiding me wasn’t going to solve anything.  I didn’t look forward to the impending conversation, but we couldn’t ignore it.

The rest of the day went by in a blur.  I went over to Maggie’s after school to get ready for the game.  We had to wear something for the outdoors but be prepared for the party afterwards.  The after party would not be a Dewey’s this time.  Instead it was going to be at Luke’s.  With his mom out of town for the weekend, it was his turn to do his part for the grand entertainment for the high school senior crowd.  Never having been to his house before my curiosity was peaked.  I have to say I was most fascinated to see his room although being alone with him there may not be a good idea.  However, seeing his personal space might reveal things yet unknown to me about him.

Maggie and I having planned this in advance, I had clothes in the back of her car.  I was spending the night at her house after the party. My mom wasn’t working late and I didn’t want to have the curfew question be raised.  Maggie didn’t have a curfew because wisely she had cited to her parents that her two older brothers never had one so why should she. She complainant that their rules were totally sexist had worked.

We decided to wear Everett sweatshirts over our party girl tops. That way we wouldn’t have to change but simply take the sweatshirts off after the game.  We headed out early because the away game was in Bethesda.  We were playing one of the W school’s of Montgomery County.  Our opponent’s football team was ranked regionally as high as the school was nationally rank scholastically.  That meant it would be a tough game.  We had about an hour and half drive ahead of us.  Maggie offered Paul to ride with us, but he’d declined in a text.  I’d expected as much because he still hadn’t spoken to either one of us.

I tried not to think of the trouble between us.   Instead, I caught Maggie up about what happened in Luke’s car and us getting caught by Flynn at lunch and she laughed.  All was good.  We sang our favorite tunes the rest of the way.

We won the game divisively so it wasn’t surprising that Luke’s party filled with drunken teenagers.  Even Maggie took a drink in hand despite my protest when we walked in.  I felt like the only sober person there, when I noticed Jay and Kathy eyeing the crowd from the perch along a wall in the back.  They seemed attentively watching everyone and it was almost creepy.  The house was already packed.  It turned out not to be just a senior party this time, although I wouldn’t say all were invited.  I couldn’t even look around really to get a fill of the house.  It was hard enough just to maneuver in between the masses of people.

I was dancing with Luke.  He at the very least was on his way to being drunk.  I wasn’t sure what was going on with him, but he was different somehow.  He’d drank at least two beers since I came and he had a third in his hand.  I’d never seen him this way. And he’d shrugged off my question if something was wrong.  He’d had drinks at the other party but he hadn’t been drunk.  Something was definitely up.

The makeshift dance floor was plastered wall to wall with people undulating indiscriminately.  The music was thumping and Luke’s hands were on me decisively tonight.  I wouldn’t say he groped me yet, but his hands were not tame as they’d been at Jay’s party.

Feeling uncertain as to what to do, I tilted my head at the next song indicating I was through.  I scanned the area in search of Maggie.  I didn’t see her.  I began to move away when I felt Luke’s arm tighten around my waist.  He pulled me back into the curve of his body where I seen to fit so well.    “Where are you going?”

I leaned back my head and said loudly, “I need some air.”

He let go of my waist and took my hand leading me through the crowd.  I thought we’d go outside instead I found myself being led me up a curved staircase in the entryway.  Out from the back of the house where the party was in full swing, it was slightly quieter.  Artwork with cherubs and haloed ancient figures were positioned strategically on the walls.  I had a moment to remember that Luke’s father was a pastor which explained the divine theme of the artwork.

Upstairs, I followed Luke down a long hallway to a closed door.  When he opened it, I knew it was his room.  I was huge.  One side of the room there was an enormous bed that seemed small in the room.  In front of the bed was a large flat panel television mounted on the wall.  A desk with a bookcase in one corner filled with trophies and metals.  Most surprising of all was a small brown leather sofa in front of another television with game systems attached on the other side of the room.  What teenager really had this kind of room?

He closed the door and pulled me to the sofa interrupting me from taking in anymore view of his room.  Next thing I knew his previously tentative hands were on me like a predator.  He tasted so much like beer I thought I might get tipsy just by kissing him.  His hands and mouth were more aggressive than any time before.  I tried to catch my breath and shift away, but he wouldn’t let me.  I’d begun to feel somewhat afraid.

Dizzy with sensations, good and bad I was a bit conflicted on what to do.  I wasn’t able to move away.  He seemed to grow eight hands.  What happened to moving things slow? I thought to myself.   My eyes flew open when his hand landed firmly on my bra.  I saw fire in his eyes that burned into me.  An adrenaline rush from the no touching zone allowed me to shove him off of me.  He fell on the floor in a drunken heap.  “Stop,” I said, catching my breath.

I couldn’t be sure if it was the beer, him or me that was causing his behavior; but I wasn’t ready for that no matter what the beast inside me wanted. I could feel that demon part of me that yearned to have him near.

He must have been holding the beer when he fell because the beer now dripped from his face.  I wondered how he managed it because his hands had been all over me. He wiped some of it off in a fluid motion before speaking.  The look on his face showed the early signs of anger.  “What’s wrong Mercy, you want me to beg?” he said, from his place on the floor.

Stupefied, I didn’t know who’d body snatched my boyfriend.  His words stung like a wasp.  More so was that brainless reference to my name.  I thought he was above using what no one else could seem to resist teasing me with over and over again.  But more than that, he was level headed and thoughtful, not some crazed teenage boy who just wanted to get laid.  But then again, I hadn’t known him long had I.  Maybe it had all been an act.

Tears burned in my eyes and I felt choked up, “You said,” I started to say.

“You acted like you wanted it earlier.  Are you just a tease?” he mocked.

Eyebrows raised and open mouthed, I was almost speechless again. “No, how can you say these things,” I stammered.

He stood, “Funny, I wondered just how you could kiss someone else mere minutes after I kissed you,” he accused.

My face ripened as if he’d slapped me.  “How..,” was the only word I got out.

He slurred lightly when he said, “Nina told me earlier.  Are you denying it?” When I said nothing, he stood swaying slightly. “The hell with this,” he barked and left me in alone in his room.

I admit it, I cried.  I’m not usually a cry baby but this time tears were warranted.  Thinking about my options, I could go downstairs and confront Nina.  But would I want to start an all out war for her telling the truth.  His room seemed to undulate as tears streamed from my eyes.  So, I folded myself in my own arms, wrapping myself in a tight ball and let my emotions flow.

Chapter Fifteen

elucidate (v.) to clarify, explain

I didn’t dare leave this room yet fearing everyone would know what happened.  Needing an escape plan, I texted Maggie to find out where she was.  Why I just didn’t leave on my own was easy answer.  I didn’t have a ride and needed to find one.  Time past with no response from Maggie.  Where the heck was she?  I was certain she was lip-locked with Brent somewhere in the house.  So, I texted Paul.  I hadn’t seen him, but his car had been parked outside when we came.  It was a quick text letting him know it was a 911 that we needed to talk.  When that went unanswered I knew he was still ignoring me which was becoming quite annoying.

Stepping out of my own grief, I remembered back to lunch.  Paul seemed just as upset as Amber did.  Had Nina told Amber about Paul and me, too?  I found I no longer liked Nina if I ever did.   I didn’t cared about her feelings anymore.  In fact I felt vaguely revengeful.

I couldn’t hide in Luke’s room forever.   Or maybe I could.  It was quiet up here. Maybe I should stay.  He would eventually come back.  Then I could explain.  Realizing it was foolish to stay, I decided I desperately needed to find Maggie or Paul.  I couldn’t hide here anymore.   I need to take action.  When I stepped out of the room I saw Flynn and Amanda heading down the hallway ahead of me.

“Flynn,” I called out not caring what a mess I was right now.

They both turned and stopped to stare at me.  I stopped too.  He said something softly to Amanda titling his head to the side towards the stairs.  She narrowed her eyes at me before turning back and heading back to the party alone.  He walked over to me. “What’s wrong?”

I fell into him like we were long lost friends and began a string of words that sounded like one. “NinatoldLukeIkissedPaulandnowhe’smadatme,” I said sobbing.

I guess he spoke sob-en-ease because he answered, “Ah, I heard about that.  What were thinking chicka?” he said using a fake Spanish accent.

“Ididn’tdoitPaulkissedme,” I blubbered on leaving wet stains on his shirt.

My emotions would make more sense later.  I would realize that PMS was the underlying cause for my emotional breakdown.  I may have still cried that day given the circumstances, but I was not one to cry like a baby especially to Flynn of all people.  I don’t think I cried this much when I found out I was a succubus.  Certainly that event warranted totally breakdown.

Still in his arms he walked me back into Luke’s room.  He sat me on the bed which was closer than the gaming area.  “Slow down, you’re not making sense.”  So maybe he didn’t speak sob-en-ease.

“I want to go home,” I said after a deep breath.

“I’ll go find Luke.  He’ll take you home,” he said.  He didn’t crack a joke which surprised me as much as everything else this night.

“He’s too drunk to drive me.  Will you take me home?” I asked, no longer crying.  I felt purged.  If I took the time to analyze it, it just wasn’t Luke I was crying over.  I was also crying over Paul and maybe even Maggie too.  I had no one.

“I’m going to find him anyway,” he said.

I looked up through blurry eyes. “He hates me?” I was able to say with just a few tears.  I wanted to say more because I hadn’t been able to elucidate up to this point.

He looked at me and when he didn’t answer I was sure I hit the nail on the head.  When he did speak, I felt mildly relived.  “He doesn’t hate you. He’s mad but he’ll get over it.”

“And he’ll get over me.” I said with a certain resolve.

He leaned down and wrapped me in his arms again and patted my back. I hadn’t expected kindness from Flynn.  I didn’t think this day could get any weirder.  “Mercy, you need to choose.”

I pulled back from him, my tears were gone now with a spark of irritation.  “I didn’t ask for this. I want Luke,” I said with fortitude.  Without thinking, the words plowed out and I had my answer.  I really did want him.  Well not the drunk Luke from earlier, but the one that held my hand and waited for me to kiss him.

“Wait here,” he said “I’ll be back in a minute.”

Reluctantly I let him go.  I needed someone to fix this.  The best person to talk to Luke was his best friend.  When he left the room I had a moment of weakness.  I stood and walked over to the table in front of the television.  There sat Luke’s half empty plastic cup of beer.  I picked it up and took a big gulp before I tasted the bitterness that slid down my throat.  Geez, how did people drink this?  It tasted awful.  With a frown and an instant queasy stomach I put the cup back down.  I’d hoped the drink would provide liquid courage.  There were several people downstairs I needed to confront.  First Paul because he started all of this.  Next Nina because she was over stepping her way into my life.  Finally Maggie, where was my best friend when I desperately needed her.  But that one quick drink of drink made my stomach roll.  I found myself stretched out on Luke’s bed.  It smelled much like him soapy fresh and a summer breeze all rolled into one.  I yawned.  It was late and where was Flynn?  I closed my eyes for a second determined to leave the room and find the three people I needed to talk to once the queasiness past.

Squinting, I woke up to streaming sunlight that wrapped my face in a warm blanket of light.  The brightness blinded me, leaving me only with other senses like that of touch.  It alerted me to the fact that an arm was wrapped around me.

I turned my head away from the light of the window to my right.  Best I could to see, it was Luke still sleeping who was embracing me.  A wave of relief washed over me.  Maybe this meant he’d forgiven me.  Flynn, my hero, must have talked to him.  I wanted to stay in his warm embrace but a couple of thought crossed my brain in rapid succession.  Where was Maggie? I was supposed to spend the night at her house.  What time was it?  I needed to be home before my mother found out where I wasn’t.  I desperately needed my phone.  I also needed to pee.

Wiggling a bit I made it out from under Luke’s arm without waking him.  I stood on the floor noticing I didn’t have shoes on.  Someone must have taken them off but otherwise I was fully dressed.  I looked back to see Luke was also.  I headed to the opposite side of the room where two doors stood.  With the grandness of this house, I was positive Luke had his own private bathroom.

I’d begun to pass the small sofa, when I heard a voice and stopped. “Mercy is that you,” Flynn said in crackled voice.  His head popped up over the back side of the sofa.  It was utterly maddening that he looked so good with bed head.

“Yes,” I said in almost a whisper.

Proceeding forward, I headed to the door on the right and Flynn voice pierced the quiet again. “Left door.”

I moved to open that door and found a bathroom to die for on the other side.  The floors were marble, the countertops granite, sunken tub, and glass surrounded shower.  Everything looked like something out of Town and Country magazine or a fancy hotel.  But nature was calling, so I found the familiar porcelain bowl.

I was looking in the mirror when I thought about the candy bar commercial.  It was a classic.  Some random girl looking in her date’s medicine cabinet, when it came crashing down alerting her date she’d been snooping.  I splashed my face with cool water.  Then I took some time to gargle plain water hoping to take away some morning breath before heading out.  I would have finger brushed my teeth, but the counter space was clear.  I wasn’t going to be that girl searching cabinets and getting my hands caught in the cookie jar so to speak.  Forgiveness for the unwanted kiss that I’d neglected to tell Luke about before Nina beat me to it was bad enough.  I walked out hoping Flynn didn’t think I was snooping.

Flynn was sitting up now.  I fingered through some of my bed head wishing I’d combed through it before I came out.  But I remembered that Flynn and I would be housemates soon.  He would see me at my worst.  So I let it go.  I did pull out a hair band out of my pocket and twisted my hair in a pony before joining him on the sofa.

I sat on the opposite end.  Luke was still asleep not thirty feet away.  Last thing I needed was for him to get the wrong idea about Flynn and me.

“Thanks,” I said pointing back at Luke.  I hated to notice, but Flynn still looked amazing even first thing in the morning.

“Yeah, you caused quite a stir last night,” he said.  His voice still sounded like he was half asleep.

Alarm rose in my face, “What happened? Where’s Maggie?” I suddenly remembered my phone.

“She’s ok. She’s somewhere downstairs probably sleeping.”  He yawned.

The beast inside me stirred.  I was starting to recognize the lustful feeling it brought with it.  I immediately felt guilty.  The succubus continued to uncoil inside me.  I exhaled, not knowing I held my breath.  Trying to ignore the sudden burst of desire, I asked. “So what happened?  How’d you get him back up here?”

Flynn flashed me his million dollar smile.  He huffed. “That proved to be entertaining.”  I stared at him hating he was drawing out the details and feeling totally at his mercy.  “You owe me,” he added.

I forced the smile as the succubus tried to assert dominance over me.  Thankfully, I felt rested because I could feel the all out war over the animation of my body.  Gritting my teeth, I said, “Fine. Just elucidate.”  He was not going to let this be easy.

He looked at me perplexed.  I rolled my eyes before I pulled out my phone.  I few swipes later I handed him my phone.  Taking it, he read the display and gave a little nod. “It’s a little early for that, Webster, don’t you think?” he said handing me back my phone.

I shoved it back in my pocket saying nothing.  I wanted him to tell me what happen.  “Come on already,” I said.  Then I looked back at the bed to make sure I hadn’t woken Luke.  He didn’t stir.

Drawing a breath, Flynn scanned me from head to foot. I shivered.  If he didn’t start speaking and conquer my attention with this line of conversation, I didn’t think I would be able to resist the monster within much longer.  The demon was relentless and wanted Flynn bad.  “Let’s see.  When I left you I found young Luke drunk beyond reason cornered by Nina in the hall.”

My jaw dropped.  That did it.  My emotions won this battle.  The succubus fell away.  That name sent the demon into hiding.  Or my anger was too strong for the succubus to conquer.

“Believe me when I say she was pissed when I took him away.  She yelled at me.  All hell broke loose after that.  Amanda felt I needed to be rescued and yelled back at her.  I left them to talk to Luke and explain that you hadn’t initiated contact with Paul.” He exhaled after the long string of words that still dangled from his mouth.  I need to find the end of that line because I feared with trepidation what was to follow.

“He wasn’t pleased with that bit of information and proceeded to hunt Paul with a fury not matched by one not inebriated.”

I gasped and covered my mouth.

“Yes, he confronted Paul.  The commotion caused others to believe a fight was about to happen.  People circled them like a pack of dogs.”

I coughed out air I didn’t think was left in my lungs.

“Yeah,” he said and paused for a poignant moment. I nearly screamed for him to finish, but he saw the desperation in my face which spurred him on.  “Luckily, I grabbed on to his arm with a vice grip as he hurl a barrage of expletives to Paul about kissing you.”

“Shit,” I said in a tiny voice I didn’t think he heard.

“That wouldn’t quite cover it Mercy, because you got some ‘plaining to do,” he said taking a line from the old black and white television series ‘I love Lucy’, I watched occasionally when nothing else could be found on over four hundred cable channels.  That is always interesting to me that nothing fascinating can be found to watch on a gazillion cable channels.

“What?” I said in response to his bad imitation.  I was truly confounded by his words.

“Paul admitted he kissed you, but he also yelled back that you didn’t stop him,” he said in dramatic fashion glaring at me.

“I,” stuttered the word, “I was stunned.”

“Yeah, ok. I’ll leave that for now.”

“But Luke being the trusting sort came up here after Paul left with a crying Amber.  I followed him to referee if needed.”

I dropped my head in my hands.  I felt really bad.  All because of me Amber was hurting.  I understood what it was to hurt for someone.

“Don’t start,” he said firmly. I looked back up so he could see my dry eyes.  Content that I wasn’t going to cry he continued.  “When we finally made it back you were asleep.  Luke, really drunk, passed out next to you.”

So based on the story Flynn was giving me Luke and I hadn’t actually made up.  He’d come up here but was he planning on confronting me again?

“I don’t know what happen after that because I left him with you to shut down the party and take Amanda home.”

I finally found my voice. “Why’d you come back?” I asked really confused by this new side of Flynn.

“I had to check on my best friend and you,” he surprised I asked.

“And?” I said thinking there was more.

“Well, when I got back the two of you looked quite cozy.  But from the looks of it, you didn’t wake up until now.”

I nodded.

“Don’t worry.  Luke is the forgiving sort.  You didn’t start it so that says something,” he said.  I dropped my head further and held my forehead.  “Hey, he puts up with me and he thinks I’m a scoundrel.”

I wondered after getting to know Luke better how they could be friends.  I shook my head. “I need to get home before my mom kills me,” I said.

“Don’t sweat that either.  Maggie said something about telling her parents you all were sleeping over your house.  She just needs to make it home by ten so her parents won’t call your mom for any reason.”

“I should wake her up and get home,” I said looking back up at him.

“It’s seven in the morning, Merce. You’d look suspicious coming home this early.”

“Seven,” I said.  I had to admit he was right.  I needed to do something then. “I can’t just sit around.”

“I have an idea. Follow me.”  He got up and I followed him all the way to the kitchen.

“You want me to cook,” I said dryly.

“We have to eat and besides you owe me,” he said.

“I can’t just cook in Luke’s kitchen without permission,” I said.

“Luke won’t care.  He just had a huge party with people all over his house eating and drinking all his stuff.”

I couldn’t argue with that logic. I was a bit hungry as well.  I pulled the large doors of the stainless steel refrigerator with the brand name SubZero and inspected the contents inside.

“Cook enough for seven and remember four of us eat hardy.”

Seven, I thought.  I could count five of us if Brent stayed with Maggie.  And where was she?  I hadn’t seen her and I wondered where she was bunked up.  Who were the other two?  Flynn was read the metal calculation on my face because he answered my question before I asked.

“Jay and Kathy stayed as well,” he said.

They were my first guess but I wasn’t sure. “Why’d you take home Amanda?” I asked truly curious.  Everyone else seemed to be paired up.  Flynn didn’t strike me as a guy not to take advantage of every opportunity.

“I wasn’t in the mood,” he said. Mood for what I thought.  But I decided I didn’t need the answer.

I pulled open cabinets searching for the tools of my trade.  After a quick exploration I decided to make eggs, bacon, and pancakes.  I started working while Flynn sat on a bar stool at the counter watching me.

“What do you think about the lake trip?” he asked.

I stopped and looked at him. “I’m not sure what to think,” I said honestly.

Seriously, at first I couldn’t imagine spending a week with Flynn.  But now, I wasn’t so sure.  He was such a different person than what he projected at school.  He’d been there for me when no one else was.

“It won’t be bad,” he said.  “You may even have fun.  We have a hot tub.”  Then he said something like that to remind me of the Flynn I loved to hate.

I rolled my eyes and continued to work.  Cooking soothed my soul, I truly enjoyed it.  I was able for a little while forget my predicament, concentrating on fixing a great meal.  Flynn didn’t say much more, so I thought about the vacation. This whole trip had been sprung on me but maybe I would have a good time.

“Make sure you pack for hanging out and usually there are a few parties to go to,” he said.  I eyed him.  I wasn’t used to so much socializing with anyone except my inner circle of Paul and Maggie.  Hanging out with the elite was still very new to me.

“Can you start some coffee?” I asked, Flynn who sat being useless.  Well that wasn’t truthful.  He was full of information.

“Not sure I can, the machine looks complicated,” he said cocking an eye in the direction to the right of me.

Following his field of vision, I turned to eye the espresso machine.  Luckily, I’d watch an infomercial one time for a similar machine I was curious about.  I left my pancake batter and stepped in front of the machine.  Taking a guess, I opened a cabinet above it getting coffee grounds.  Sure enough they were there.  Tinkering around a bit, I successfully made one cup and offered it to Flynn for a taste test.

“Not bad, you’re some Suzie homemaker,” he said holding up the cup in a mock toast.  I had to smile at his comment.

“How do you like your eggs?” I asked.  I couldn’t believe how comfortable I was around Flynn.  I had completely forgotten my demon until it began to stir under Flynn careful scrutiny.

For a split second his mouth moved but I didn’t hear his words.  A hunger not for food watched his mouth with utter fascination.  I closed my eyes pushing the undesired thoughts back.  The world came back to me with a rush of sound.  I ended up asking him to repeat himself.  He hesitated, then did without question.  Concentrating, I didn’t look at Flynn.  Timing was everything when it come to great cooking.  As long as I didn’t look into his handsome face, I could hold the succubus at bay.   Not even a minute passed after I slid Flynn’s eggs on to a plate did Mr. and Mrs. Jay walk in looking way to good to have woken up only minutes before.

“Coffee, Eggs?” I asked then pointed to some pancakes that were ready to serve.  As attractive as Jay was, he I looked at him, my demon did something very strange.  It hid inside me.  I didn’t question it, grateful for the reprieve.

With their request made, I tackled the espresso machine for two more cups and scrambled eggs for the couple.  Brent and Maggie walked in soon after.  Maggie came and gave me a hug that let me know she was aware of what happened last night.  She gave me a knowing look too but didn’t say anything.  Before long I felt like a short order cook.

“Man, I heard you could cook, but I didn’t really believe it.” Brent said.  Did guys gossip as much as girls or did Maggie talk about my cooking to Brent?

“It’s just breakfast,” I said humbly.

“Oh, Eme can burn.  She cooks better than my mom, who’s a pretty good cook,” Maggie said.  There was my answer.  Maggie comment made it clear that she hadn’t talked about my cooking until now.  So It wasn’t her who’d spread the rumor.  But it was nice to hear my best friend sing my praises.

“Great breakfast, Mercy,” Kathy said in a sultry voice.  I didn’t often pay attention to her voice but it was certainly noteworthy.

“Thanks for cooking,” Jay added.

“You’re welcome,” I said, when the room went very silent.  I stiffened knowing who must have entered the kitchen behind me.  There was only one person missing.  I wasn’t sure what to expect.  Had he forgiven me or did the crazy drunk Luke from last night come back to haunt me this morning.

Arms came around my waist in a familiar gesture and the fear I felt dissipated. “Morning,” he said in my ear.  His voice held no trace of anger.  Relief seemed to flow through the air.  Everyone returned to eating and making light conversation.

I put my hands on his hands and held on thankful for the contact. “I’m sorry,” I said softly.

Movement to my side caught my attention.  Kathy and Jay had lifted their plates and moved from the bar area.  They went and sat at the large table on the other side of the island with the others.  I wasn’t sure why Luke and his mother needed a table that large in their kitchen, but I assumed that it was put to good use for times like this when friends were over.  Conversation heated up but not loud enough so that whatever we said wouldn’t be heard.

“Coffee, Eggs” I asked not giving him a chance to respond.  I instinctively shifted into my short order cook routine.

“Coffee,” he said letting me go.

“Espresso,” I said.  Not waiting for his answer I moved over to the machine not yet wanting to look in his eye.  So far he’d been behind me.  I felt guilty somehow, maybe because Flynn and Paul were right.  I hadn’t pulled away from Paul’s kiss.  And yes, I did have feelings for Paul but I wouldn’t act on them.  I needed his friendship more than a relationship that may not last forever.  He’d be going off to college next year as would Luke.  I knew our friendship could continue if we left things as they were.  My hands shook as I made the coffee.

“You know how to use that machine?” Luke asked curiously.  He moved over to where I stood.  I shrugged.  My hands were definitely unsteady.  I spilled some of the completed cup on the counter.  He took the tiny cup from me and looked me in the eye for the first time before taking a sip.

“We should talk,” he said softly.  “But not now.”

I nodded and moved to the stove to finish the pancakes.  He came over and set his cup down and leaned in to kiss me.  His lips were quick and firm on my mouth before he pulled away.  I’d let him but I didn’t kiss him back.

“You sure you don’t want eggs?” I asked then bit my lip.  My nervousness confirmed that it was important to me that Luke and I worked things out.

“Pancakes are fine,” he said and put a couple on his plate and sat at the table.

I straightened up a bit not wanting to sit at the table.  There was no way I could eat.  Seeing him, brought all that happened last night back.  He wanted to talk and I feared what would be said. I waited until conversation was in full swing before disappearing from the kitchen unnoticed.  I slipped upstairs back to Luke’s room because I knew where it was and what to expect.

I went into his bathroom straight away and close the door.  Inside this time, I hunted for toothpaste.  I pulled a few drawers and presto I found what I needed. I lathered my teeth with paste using my finger, rinsed and gargled. Satisfied, I washed my face with warm water making sure no makeup was left over.  Pulling out my balm, I gave my lips a fresh coat and topped it with gloss.  Letting loose my ponytail, I bent over finger combing my hair back into a better pony.  I gave myself a final look over and a quick breath test.  I looked ok and my deodorant had held up.  I considered a shower, I just needed to get my clothes from Maggie’s car first.  In the mean time, I was decent.

I opened the bathroom door, jumped holding my heart  and nearly let out a scream from shock.  Luke was standing by his bed so still, he almost looked like a ghost.  I stood in the doorway of the bathroom clutching my chest as I heaved large breaths.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” he said looking edible from across the room.  Edible, damn the succubus was alert.

“No problem,” I said between breaths trying hard to maintain control.

He fidgeted with his hands.  “I wanted to check on you. You just left.  And maybe we can talk because I could tell you are nervous or upset.”

“No, I just needed to use the bathroom and this was the only one I knew where to find.”

He let his hands fall to his sides.  He looked directly at me.  “You didn’t kiss me,” he said.  I understood what was left hanging.  I was nervous and I didn’t kiss him.  What did it all mean especially with the Paul confession still dangling?

I knew what I wanted.  I knew last night.  As much as I had feelings for Paul, I wanted Luke. I was so sure of it.  A few tentative steps forward follow by another few until I was moving with sure steps.  When I reached him, I put my hands on his shoulders.  Standing on the balls of my feet I planted a kiss unyielding on his mouth. He or I or both lost our balance and we fell back on the bed with me on top of him.

His arms wrapped around me but there wasn’t urgency.  I pulled away and rolled off of him. “I’m sorry for that.”

He smiled.  He held my hand and we stared at the ceiling.  I wished he wouldn’t have asked what he was about to.   I wished I’d kissed him again before he did.  But life wasn’t always that easy.

“So what happened Friday?” His question was asked with patience.

I gave his hand a quick tight squeeze.  I had to start from the beginning even though we briefly talked about some of it in his car at lunch.  “Truth is, I’m not sure. I saw you there when we pulled into the parking lot that morning and I just wanted to kiss you. So I did and apparently it was enough of a shock that people paid attention.  You walked me to class and I made the mistake of watching you walk away.” I paused, smiling at the memory.  He had a nice ass that looked good in jeans and I couldn’t help myself.  What was weird is that I confessed it to him so easily.  I looked at him to see his reaction to my admission. His smile was hesitant. So I bit my lip not wanting to go on with the truth.

Continuing I looked away and said, “I was just about to head into class when Paul dragged me off around a corner.  He said few words and then he kissed me.  I was off guard because I never expected it.  It all happened pretty quickly and he stalked off leaving me to wonder what the hell had happened.  Apparently Nina saw and took it upon herself to hurt all of us by blabbering.  And that pisses me off.”

“Would you have told me otherwise?” he asked cautiously.

I had to pause on that.  Initially I might have said no, but truthfully I would have shared it with him. “Yes,” I said.

“So that’s it.  There’s nothing between the two of you?” he asked.

I didn’t answer right away because that was the million dollar question I hoped he never asked. I didn’t want to lie to him but the answer was complicated.  When he started to uncurl his fingers I jumped to answer. “I am not sure of his motives.  I hadn’t talk to him yet.  We’ve been friends forever. I never expected this,” I said in a rush.

“Why’d you break up with him?” he said with his hand still in mine.

There is a saying goes turnabout is fair play.  He never answered my question about Nina, so why should I answer his.  But, I guess since I was the one who was kissed it was a valid question to ask.  I wasn’t giving up finding out the answer to my question but I knew now wasn’t the time for that fight.

“It could never work between the two of us.  He knew it and I did too.  So we became best friends and that’s how I want it to stay.”  I turned over on my side to look at Luke in his eye. “I want to be with you.”

He did a quarter turn resting on his elbow and said, “Are you sure about that?”

“Yes,” I said with no hesitation.

He reached his hands to my face and pulled me to him.  He kissed me deeply now.  I lost all thought when flames burst under my skin.  I was sure I had a fever now because I was red hot.  I felt like a rocket ship headed into space.  Whenever I kissed him, I saw more than a few stars. I saw millions. I saw the universe.

I put my hands on his chest and was surprised by the taut muscles I felt through his shirt.  He pulled me to him and we rolled until I was on top of him again.  My hands slid up his arms feeling his biceps and triceps.

His hand tugged on the band of my hair freeing it.  It spilled over haloing his face.  His hands were in my hair as we kissed.  Then his hand made a slow and steady journey south but stopped at my lower back just at the waist band of my jeans.  He made no move to venture further and I wondered if that was deliberate.

Mercy, the succubus, however found that she wanted his hands on my flesh.  I knew I was in trouble when I was thinking of myself in the third person.  I fought the urge to take off my shirt.   The succubus was battling me for control again.  Struggling couldn’t describe how hard I fought to maintain control.

The door to Luke’s room opened but that didn’t stop us completely.  Slowly he rolled me onto my back and disengaged us.

“I’m sorry for last night.  I was drunk and upset but there’s no excuse for my behavior.”

I looked away remembering what happened and closed my eyes.  Opening my eyes, I noticed his bedroom door was closed again.  I didn’t know who opened it but guessed the only one bold enough to walk in without knocking was Flynn.

“It’s alright,” I said after a long moment looking at the ceiling again.

“No, it’s not.  And I want you to know that I’m not expecting anything from you,” he said with conviction.

“I know,” I answered meeting his eyes.  I honestly believed him.

His eye searched mine.  I saw the his doubt.  There was a long pause before he said, “You don’t believe me, but I’ll prove it to you.”

I took his hand. “We both made mistakes yesterday.  And I trust you.  And hopefully you trust me to deal with Paul.  I don’t want to be the cause of bad blood between the two of you.”

He looked away from me. “He made his choice.”

“I’m not so sure. Something may have happened between him and Amber that made him act that way.  I know him and it so unlike him to do something like that,” I said.

“People act weird when they’re in love,” he said flatly.

“Paul doesn’t,” I couldn’t complete that sentence.

“I saw it in his eyes, Mercy.  Everyone’s seen it and after last night everyone’s sure to talk about it,” he said.

Why were his feelings so transparent yet I missed it.  Were my feelings just as open?  I mean Maggie said she surely knew.

A knock came at the door and we both sat up on the bed.   “Come in,” Luke said.

Maggie peeked inside. “Eme, we should be going.  It’s after nine.”

Where had the time gone? “Ok, I’ll be a minute.”

She nodded and closed the door. “I could take you home,” Luke said.

I stood and came to stand in front of Luke. “Yeah and with my luck my mom will be outside then I will be grounded for life.”

I leaned down slightly and gave him a quick peck on the lips.  Turning to go, I realized to late he had other plans.  Twirling me back to him and into his embraced, he gave me a deeper kiss. God, how I couldn’t believe how long I missed out on moments like this.

When I could breathe again I said teasingly, “I have to go.”

“I know.  Can I see you later today?” he asked.

His eyes drank me in and I drowned in their warm pools.  I’d forgotten just how he affected me.  “I’ll try,” I said and leaned in for another kiss.

When we finally separated he said, “Maybe I can come take you out somewhere. Does your mom know about me?”

I saw the wicked gleam in his eye.  I slowly shook my head side to side and gave him a wide grin. “No, she doesn’t, yet.”

Chapter Sixteen

sanguine (adj.) optimistic, cheery

Sitting in the back of David’s black Range Rover, I thought about all the things that transpired over the past few weeks.  Paul continued to ignore me and I put my efforts into my budding relationship with Luke.  He kept both our heads cool even a few times when I thought the succubus might win the battle.  He’d been simply amazing.  I spent last night with him at his house on the couch watching old horror movies.  I felt a tiny bit bad at lying to my mom because she thought I was at Maggie’s.  Her parents thought she was at mine.  Despite being alone with Luke, we still remained chaste.  If David only knew what independence that tiny tube gave me, I think he might have regretted giving it to me.

I had my eyes closed while listening to my latest playlist.  I thought back to my conversation with Maggie on the way home from Luke’s a couple of Saturdays ago.   She filled me in on the party events where Flynn’s story lacked important details that maybe only could be seen through another girl’s eyes.  Like, he’d failed to mention that Amanda and Nina had almost come to blows and Brent had to separate them.  Flynn had been no where around because he’d simply left when it started.  Flynn also didn’t mention that Luke took a swing at Paul.  Furthermore, if Flynn hadn’t pulled him back at the right moment, Luke would have connected.  A more important detail was that Paul had just stood there waiting for it without defending himself.

It had been too much for me to ask that Paul and Luke remain friends.  They weren’t fighting but they weren’t talking either.  Amber sat next to Nina at lunch.  They seemed to form a bond.  I’m sure they had a lot in common now.  That being me.  But Amber was still civil to me.  I knew there was a reason I liked her.  She didn’t have it in herself to blame or hate me.  But that didn’t mean we were chummy.  Paul continued to be a no show for lunch.

I wouldn’t think about Paul now.  He wasn’t returning my calls.  Maggie was planning to ambush him at his job.  He was a waiter at this Italian restaurant in town.  She was going to get a table in his section so he couldn’t avoid her.  So I didn’t expect to hear anything until late tonight.

I opened my eyes to see Flynn’s light brown hair glow in the sunlight as it passed through the window to halo around his head.  His eyes were closed, but I wasn’t sure he was sleep.  He looked like an angel and it was definitely disconcerting.  Flynn was no angel and even he would admit that.

He must have sensed me watching because his eyes flashed open and landed on mine.  He gave me that famous sly grin of his.  It was as if he caught me with my hand in the proverbial cookie jar.  I turned away and heard his faint laugh.  I paused my ipod before I turned back to him.  I wanted to accept the view of him with no emotions from the music playing in my ear.

When I looked back his eyes were still fastened on me and I flushed.  He glanced down to pull out his phone and I had to thank God.  No matter what my true feeling were for him, he always seem to stir something deep inside me.  I watched him type away before I focused my attention back to my ipod searching for a different song.  I hadn’t found one yet when my phone vibrated in my pocket.  I pulled it out to see who it could be.

No more than two feet away from me, I smiled when I saw it was from Flynn.  Peering up at the front seat, I checked on my mom.  She was awake.  David was driving with faint tunes playing in the background.  Anything Flynn and I said would be overheard.   So I made perfect sense for us to converse through texting.

In text speech he basically said something like, “You like what you see.”

I wanted to giggle but instead I stole a glance at him again.  He was still smiling.  His lightly tan skin and perfectly styled hair just added to his beauty.  I decided that text speech was not in order for my reply.  Rather, I hit him where it hurt him most I’d learned, with my SAT words.

I typed with a grin and flash it on him when I was finished.  ‘My antipathy grows contemporaneously with your bombastic nature’ and hit send.  No text speech here and my nibble fingers felt bruised doing it.  I typed it all long hand and waited until he read it.  Frowning he looked up at me before I pushed my phone back in my pocket with a game set match smirk on my face returning my attention back to my playlist.  I closed my eyes for the rest of the journey.

Although I was going to miss Maggie, Luke and even Paul, I was sanguine about this trip.  Mentally, I ran through a list of vocabulary words in prep for the March exam.  I felt secure about the Math part, but I needed an edge for English.  The more I used the practice SAT vocabulary words, the easier it would be for me to incorporate those words in the essay section of the test too.  I’d gotten as far as several words that began with D when I must have fallen asleep.

Rolling to a stop, I was pulled gently from a dreamless sleep.  My ipod was still rocking mildly in my ear.  A song about being strong and following your dreams was humming brilliantly.  If only life was that easy, I thought to myself.  I pulled out my ear buds to take in the breathtaking view that was the McAllister’s lake house.

Nestled seamlessly onto the side of a small mountain, the home’s façade was warm with rich golden browns and a splash of windows were everywhere to let light stream into the house.  As everyone piled out, I stepped out the car still astonished I was here.

Flynn silently drifted around the car and put his hand on my shoulder.  “You gaping, Webster,” he said obviously hitting me back with my ‘big words’.  I said nothing.  “Let me show you inside,” he finished.

Guiding me with his hand, I let him lightly pushed me forward.  We walked up an inclined cobbled path to an open porch the size of a deck.  A covered mound far off to the side looked familiarly like a sunken hot tub.  I turned my head back to walk through the double door entryway.  We stepped inside a wide open floor plan.  Somewhat rustic in a fancy way, I could see the dining room, living room, and even the gleaming kitchen which held shiny silver appliances along with bright maple cabinets.  Only an island with bar stools blocked the full kitchen view.  To the left of the kitchen was a narrow hallway that led somewhere to the back.  An open staircase led upstairs to a balcony with a view below.  Opposite the balcony were several of doors that must have led to bedrooms.  One was directly caddy corner at the top of the stairs.

None of that held my attention.  It was my passion for cooking had me taking another look at the grand kitchen.  I imagined cooking in there.  The kitchen itself wasn’t huge like Luke’s kitchen had been.  It was more homey size.  I wouldn’t feel so intimidated expressing myself through food in there.

“Mercy, your room is at the opposite end of the hallway once you get upstairs,” my mom said.  I nodded but didn’t say anything while I continued planning what food creations might happen on this vacation. That thought soothed me.  Cooking was never a chore for me.

“I know we don’t have to warn the two of you to be on your best behavior.  Flynn room is at the top of the stairs with his own bathroom.  So there really won’t be any need for him to go down to the other end of the hallway,” she said to me, but really for Flynn’s benefit.

“Sure, no problem,” he said as if she’d spoken directly to him.  My mom stood looking between us.

“Gosh mom, Flynn has a girlfriend,” I said crudely before looking away.  Maybe I shouldn’t have used that tone of voice but we weren’t children.  I had no interest in Flynn in that way no matter what the succubus felt.

“You have nothing to worry about with me.  She’s dating a friend of mine,” he said.  I cringed.  That was a secret I wasn’t yet ready to share.  He probably thought he was helping.  I rolled my eyes which was becoming a habit lately.

My mom looked at me which I totally expected.  Avoiding her gaze, I moved quickly with my bag to head upstairs turning back only slightly to say, “Well, I guess I’ll go unpack.”  I dashed nearly two steps at a time upstairs not looking back hoping she wouldn’t follow me.

She didn’t.  The large room at the end of the hall that would be mine for a week was twice the size of mine back at home.  The room could have been attached to a four star hotel.  The decorations were simple but tasteful to accommodate any guest no matter the gender spectrum.    I was sure it was a guest room suited for David’s guests.

Unlike the kitchen the wood in here was a rich dark wood.  The four poster bed was the focus of the room with crisp white linens and a sand colored duvet.  A large dresser in the same dark chocolate wood color was centered against a wall opposite the bed between two doors.  A couple of neutral abstract paintings that added splashes of color like reds, oranges, and a hint of green were hung about the room.

Two windows brought in the light that cascaded through the room illuminating everything without the need of lamps.  One was a large picture window that hung directly behind the head of the bed with flowing white linen curtains.  The other was opposite the door and even had a window seat to boot with a couple of cozy pillows tossed about in the same silky tan color as the duvet in different textures.

After dropping my bags on the wall closest to my room door, I took a few steps and opened the first door on my right before the dresser.  Inspecting what was behind door number one, I found an amazing bathroom.  Again I was reminded of hotel room accommodations I’d only seen on commercials or movies.  It was way larger than mine at home.  Granite counter top covered the ornate cabinet that held a single sink that floated on top.  The faucet poured from the wall like a piece of art work.  I could have stood there all day looking at it.  Although there wasn’t a window in here, I didn’t feel the least be claustrophobic.  Further back there was a glassed in shower and a sunken tub.  This vacation was looking better and better.

I walked out past the dresser to see behind door number two.  Knowing it was the closet didn’t take my stunned expression looking at it.  Walking in I understood it was at least the length of the bathroom.  Who would need this much space?  I doubted that my meager belongings would take up a eighth of the space.  The built in racks and drawers matched the eye catching wood color of the bathroom cabinet.  I could imagine that a twin sized mattress could fit in here and there still would be room to move around.

Walking out of the room shaking my head at the excess, I picked up my bag tossing it in the closet.  The room looked neat again when I sat on the bed.  I pulled my cell phone out before leaning back onto the plush mattress.  Staring up at the white ceiling, I dial Maggie to give her a first hand count of the majesty I found myself in.  Maggie’s family lived in an upscale middle class home with five bedrooms, but it didn’t compare to the lavishness I found myself in. Quickly I gave her a run down.  She was in the car with her family heading out of state.  Her younger cousin in the car with her kept begging to talk to me.  The girl was a virtual chatter box.  Every time I saw her she proceeded to tell me everything that was going on in her life.  I think she liked me because I was patient with her, allowing her to talk until she lost her voice.

By the time I got off the phone, the sun was dipping deep down in the sky beginning to leave the room in shadows too quickly.  The only thing this room didn’t have that puzzled me with was television.  But if it had one, I’d never have to leave.  The door opened and Flynn walked in without being invited.

To stop the heat that began to climb up my body at the sight of him, I filled my mouth with a smart remark.  “You are in direct violation of the ordinance my mom set forth,” I said sarcastically using a tone I thought a police officer might use.

Now that he wasn’t being such an ass, I was left with the sure beauty of him that couldn’t be denied.  Trust me when I say that I was fully committed to Luke, but the dark side of me I’d yet to learn to control didn’t want to resist the temptation that was Flynn.  I was in trouble if I didn’t learn to manage it soon.

“Yeah right,” he said letting me know that rule was bogus. “I am headed out and wanted to know if you wanted to come.”

Curiosity peaked. “Where are you going?” I asked.

“I got an invite from a friend who lives around here. Everyone’s going to the old camp grounds tonight for an impromptu party in my honor.”

I looked at him not sure I heard this right. “What’s so important about you?” I said.  I couldn’t believe that he ruled here like he did the school.  It was so unfair.

“Believe me, they’re just looking for a reason to hang out and drink.  Are you in or not?” he said humbly which had to be a first for him.

I really wasn’t sure about hanging out, but then again I didn’t want to be the lone wolf at home. “Um, sure,” I said quickly.

“Alright, we leave in an hour.  It’s a bit of a hike so don’t were cute shoes or you will regret it,” he said and left before I could give him a snide retort.  Once he was gone, I groaned to myself because I wasn’t sure what to wear at a first meeting with Flynn’s friends.

A shower later, I opted to blow out my hair.  A high sleek pony tail would work for a hike.  I wore a dusty rose sleeveless top with jeans and a light jacket over top.  My gray chucks graced my feet.  It was my only option because I didn’t owned a pair of hiking boots.  Dressed my best, I knocked on Flynn’s door.  He opened and gave me a once over that made me self-conscious.

“Ok, you’ll do,” he said.

I looked down slightly insecure but quickly I recovered. “Well, thanks Mr. McCallister for your vote of confidence.  I hope I don’t cramp your style.”

Now it was his turn to roll his eyes.  “You look good Mercy.  I didn’t think I would have to stroke your ego like the rest of the girls.”

I blushed. “I’m not every girl,” I said with a careless look of my eye to the ceiling flirting before I could stop myself.

“Careful, I might think your flirting with me,” he said.

“You’re too sanguine. You are so no my taste,” I said with emphasis on the word so.

He laughed as if to say he didn’t believe me.  I let it go.  “I am sanguine, but I’ll be telling everyone you’re my sister,” he began.  So he was learning something.  I had to give him a point for that.

But I was curious about the sister aspect.  “Why,” I asked frowning.  I wasn’t sure why that was necessary.

“Trust me, it’s easier that way then explaining the whole sorted story about our parents.”

I looked past him into his room which was unquestionably more lived in then the room I resided in.  Finally, I gave him a once over.  He wore a faded rust color tee and dark wash jeans.  It was sickening just how cute he looked in anything.

“Fine,” I said not really wanting to lie to people.  I guess he would be my step-brother soon so it wasn’t a total lie.

He gave me that sly smile of his. “Maybe I should say you’re my girlfriend instead.” He moved forward and acted as if he would kiss me right this moment.

I took a small step back.  “You’re a total ass, I’d rather eat my own barf than to pretend to be your girlfriend,” I said jokingly rolling my eyes again because that statement was totally false.  Interestingly, I didn’t have a problem lying to him.

Darkness fell across the town we invaded.  Silence broke on ever twig or dried leaf either of us stepped on.  We’d walked what felt like a mile in virtual quiet between us.  I was still feeling a bit shy about meeting Flynn’s friend.  I wasn’t sure what his deal was.  Had I gone too far with my barf comment?  I decided it was time to break the silence. “Flynn,” I said

He half turned. His face didn’t reveal whether he was mad or not. “Yeah,” he said turning back continuing to walk.

“Are you mad?” I asked.

He stopped.  Something in his eyes said he was considering my question. “Mad at what?”

So he wasn’t mad.  But his question was out, so I felt I had to answer.  “I don’t know you haven’t spoken to me since we left the house.”

“Oh, I’m just thinking that’s all.”

“About?” I said.  Lately he’d been so free with his words and now it seemed I would have to drag any little information out of him.

He stopped again. “I guess if I’d wanted to fill you in, I would have,” he said giving me the eye that said duh.

Moving forward again, he’d simply dismissed me.  I had to nearly run to keep in step with him.  Although I was curious, I let his statement stand.  I had more pressing concerns.  “I do have a question I’ve been meaning to ask.” I said to the back of his head before I fell into step with him again.  It was a burning question on my mind and I couldn’t believe I’d yet to ask.  Each time it seemed like something happened.

“Well, you know how Paul knows about me?” I started.

“Yeah,” he said.  His pace hadn’t slowed.  You’d think we were on some sort of time schedule.

“Luke,” I barely got out before he finished my sentence before me.

“You’re wondering if Luke knows about me.  Then of course the next question would be does he know what you are because he’s my best friend?”

“Exactly,” I said exhaling as if I’d finally reached the finish line.  Luke had used the words I know about that dinner with Flynn and David.  I had been so preoccupied with kissing him, that morning it wasn’t important to clarify.  So much had happened that when things calmed and were good, I hadn’t thought much about it since the balm was working.

He stopped again.  He looked at me like he was going to answer my question.  Cracking the silence between us, I heard a snap of a branch.  I’d didn’t move my eyes on still on him waiting for the answer.  I knew something was just ahead.  Slowly my eyes shifted in the direction of the sound.  There stood a menacing group of teens.  Scanning them I saw a flicker of something unnatural flash in a few of their eyes.

Chapter Seventeen

winsome (adj.) charming, pleasing

coquet (v.) flirting

At a standoff, we stood sizing each other up.  There were six of them and two of us, so clearly we were out numbered.  Tense microseconds zoomed by and I wasn’t sure what Flynn would do.

When finally he took a step forward, I nearly reached out to stop him.  At the same time an attractive caramel skinned boy with swirling hazel green eyes also moved forward in our direction.  They met in the space between our groups. I was transfixed not knowing what might happen.

They clasped hands before leaning into that strange man hug with one hand each pressed between them.  They gave each other a quick firm pat on the back before quickly parting lest anyone think they somehow lost any manhood points in the act.

“Chris,” Flynn said with a voice that was warm in acknowledgement of a friend.  I exhaled the breath I’d been holding.

“Flynn,” the boy named Chris said in reply. “It never amazes me to see you with a beautiful girl.”  I blushed not expecting the compliment.

“This,” Flynn began taking a step back towards me, “is my sister, Mercy.”

I gave a polite smile and tiny head nod.  Chris raked me over with his eyes. I shifted in my stance uncomfortable with the scrutiny.

“Don’t get any ideas. She’s my best friend’s girl,” Flynn said looking back at me with faint amusement and a wink.

I looked away from Flynn and at a tiny redhead who stepped forward and clasped Chris’s arm with the possessiveness of someone more than a friend.  I was overly confused by her move.  Why had he looked at me that way if his girlfriend was standing right there?  What was even more striking was the girl wore a tank with shorts.  Heck it was November and frosty out, but she didn’t seem bothered.

When Chris began to introduce the group, I looked at the bunch that stood behind him.   As my eyes moved about the group, I noticed they stood in an odd pyramid formation.   It just seemed strange they all hadn’t come together.  They stayed in that odd formation the whole time.

Chris began by pointing to the possessive redhead hanging on his arm.  Compared to my best friend Maggie, this redhead was a bit rough around the edges.  She was kind of cute, but she didn’t have that softness to her that Maggie had.  “This is Melody,” he said.  Melody nodded to me not taking her arms off of Chris.

Turning a bit  to his left without taking his eyes off of mine he said, “This is Mike and Tamera.”  Mike was a fair tall lanky boy with hair that shined in the night like a raven.  Mike had his arms around a girl just about as tall as I was.  She was pretty with the same hazel eyes I assumed her brother Chris had.

Chris turned slightly to his right he said, “And this is Steve and Jo.”  Steve’s pale hair was almost silver in the moonlight shrouded by the surrounding trees.  His freckled face bore no signs of friendliness.  I couldn’t help but notice in weird way he resembled the redhead.  The girl next to him had dark hair with crimson dipped ends.  She above the rest looked ominous.  It didn’t help she bared her teeth at me.  I immediately thought vampire.  But did vampires exist?  Something for me to think about later.

Jo hadn’t moved any other muscle.  She looked like the kind of girl who carried knives in her pockets.  At this point it wasn’t surprising her face mirrored the face of Mike.  Three sets of siblings conveniently dating each other if the body language had any truth to it.  I had to wonder what strange things happened in Lakeview.

“We should go. The party should be starting soon,” Chris said.  I met his eyes a final time before we headed off.  I tried to understand whatever secrets they held.  But he turned before I found anymore truths.

Flynn headed off ahead with Chris with the others including myself walking behind them.  Melody fell into step with me and I wasn’t quite comfortable with her presence.  I think she saw me as some kind of threat even though Flynn clearly mentioned my boyfriend.

“Your brother is hot,” she said.  Again I was confused about the relationships that existed between them.  I was sure I hadn’t misinterpreted the possessive way she’d held onto Chris earlier.

“You too,” I groaned.  I hope I didn’t come off as a bitch.  Apparently though, she didn’t care for my tone.  In retrospect, I could see how it was possible to take my comment as a bit sarcastic.  She gave me a look I couldn’t read.  Moving away quickly with her short legs, she caught up with Flynn and Chris leaving me by myself.

Alone now, I was somewhat grateful.  I couldn’t shake the fact that this group didn’t look like a normal group of teens.  They moved through the woods like predators.  No one else ventured to talk to me and really that was fine.  I could only hope whoever else was at the party would be friendlier, otherwise it was going to be a long night.

It wasn’t long before we stepped out the thick cover of trees into an area cleared for what I could see was the abandoned camp sight.  The vicinity was filled with rusting and decaying picnic tables.  One decent sized faded gray building took up much of the open space.  It stood sadly, with peeling paint, a bit off centered to the right of the camp area.  The windows didn’t betray whatever was going on inside.  The glass was frosted or tinted so no one could see inside.  If not for the music that penetrated the rotting walls, I wouldn’t have ever know the place was currently occupied.

The pack of teens filed in through matching obscurely painted glass doors.  Flynn held back.  When I reached him, he pulled me back a few feet from the door.

“There’s something you should know before we go inside,” he said.  His eyes search mine and I was suddenly spooked.

“What?” I questioned.  I wished he would quickly get to it before I freaked out.  The battered camp grounds were spooky enough without Flynn trying to scare me.

“Chris and his friend are shifters,” he said.

I looked into his face, frowning, not sure I heard him right.  “Shifters?” I asked.

“You may be more familiar with the term werewolves, but that doesn’t really explain them. But I tell you about it later,” he said.  His voice was stern but quiet as if he were afraid to be overhead.  He looked up at the doors as if he expected them to open.  He took my arm and tugged me to the door.

I pulled my arm from his grasp.  “Wait.”

His body language tensed, “We can’t talk now.”

I wanted to say you can’t really spring this on somebody and not expect questions. But he moved and opened the door.  The night filled with sounds from the raging bass guitar on a familiar melody.

I followed behind him knowing I wouldn’t get the answers I sought.  Engulfed in a room filled with people bouncing up with fist in the air to the epic song that filled the space, I stood as the door closed behind me.

Flynn moved into the sea of people immediately and I lost him.  He was tall but so were several other guys and girls jumping around.  I hadn’t expected to see so many people hanging out.  I looked about the room.  It must have served as an all purpose room when the camp was open.  There was even a bar with a kitchen area.  Surely back then, this would have been where food was dispensed.  Much of the room had been left open and empty to serve whatever purpose was necessary.  That seemed to be just right for this impromptu party.  A modern entertainment system filled a corner of the room where the music crooned from.  I opted to walk over to the empty bar area and sat where a few old fashion metal bar stools stood empty.  I didn’t know anyone else and Flynn had abandoned me.

The music was inviting, but I didn’t feel the nerve to go and dance by myself.  So here I was people watching.  That be could be very entertaining on its own.  A small girl with pink hair jumped in the middle of the group.  Every time she landed I couldn’t see a hint of her.  She must have had a lot of bounce.  Then there was the couple in the throngs of new love.  It was easy to spot.  They gazed at each other as if each touch was new.  The crowd as a whole moved with the music with what appeared an unbridled fusion.  Waves of crisp crystalline tunes cascaded out of the impossibly tiny speakers.

“Hey,” a voice said sharply from behind me.  The sound made me jerk from the nearness. “Beautiful girl,” he finished when I looked into the face of impossible beauty.  He was gorgeous, rivaling that of Flynn.

“Hi,” I said back to the stranger that held my gaze.  I began to wonder if everyone in Maryland was amazingly attractive.  I only had to look up to see that there were a few cute boys in the room out of the dozens but only two that were stunning.  Instantly I mistrusted the boy before me.  I don’t bat for the other team but I did notice there were several prettier girls than myself in the room.

Boys have a tendency to focus on the shinning new item in the room.  That had to be me.  I was the only lonely outcast.  Everyone else here knew each other.  I could feel it.  I didn’t consider myself a raving beauty.  I was cute at best but never beautiful.  So this guy, who made my gut tight looking at him, had to have an ulterior motive.

“You look like you want to dance,” he said.

I hadn’t thought I swayed with the beat but maybe I had.  He couldn’t have read my mind or could he?  Geez, was I going to mistrust everyone I met from now on.  Flynn’s confession about the shape shifters among us, made me wonder what other supernatural being lurked in the room.

With his hand extended, he moved in front of me.  I couldn’t believe what I did next after alluding to a possible ulterior motive.  I took his hand without answering.  No harm in dancing to this great song, I tried to tell myself.  It would have been rude for me to say no, right?  And I really do like to dance.

He pulled me to the fringes of the mass of people.  A couple of times I was delighted into laughter as he twirled me even dipped me like we were on the show ‘Dancing with Stars’.  Breathless and slightly sweaty from a long string of songs, I still didn’t want to stop. But my dance partner shuffled me outside into the cool night air.

“Want a drink,” he asked.  Leaning against the cool peeling wall of the building I nodded.  Before I could clarify that water would work, the door closed behind him.  I pulled my shirt from my body a few times bring the frosty air against my damp skin.  I smiled having not expected to have such a good time tonight.  I enjoyed dancing almost as much as cooking.  Who knew such a good looking guy would enjoy dancing to?  He didn’t just stand there slightly moving to the beat, we actually done a few dance moves.  Again it reminded me of the television show in a way.  We didn’t fox trot but we moved in tandem with each other.

The night sky was a wonderland with thousands of twinkling stars.  They winked down on me, lighting up the complete darkness that encased me.  I had no time to think about what I was doing when the handsome boy with windswept chestnut hair and powerfully bluer than impossible blue eyes was back with two bottles in hand.   The crooning voice of Jared Leto announced his presence as the doors opened briefly.  Apparently, whoever owned the music system was a big fan of Leto.  It wasn’t the first song from played by the Thirty Seconds to Mars band.

I took the bottle from his hand never looking from his strange eyes.  Something in them was fascinating.  Although they twinkled much like the stars above, behind the smile his eyes were empty.  It should have freaked me out.  But I found I couldn’t look away from them.

With the bottle upturned, I took a long pull on it.  It was too late when I swallowed deep and nearly choked on what was the unmistakable taste of beer.  He took my hand as my eye burned from the bitter taste.  With not much grace, I silently cough then took in a deep breath.  He pulled me forward and didn’t seem to notice I nearly choked.  I wasn’t even sure I should care what he thought.  I had a boyfriend.

He sat and nudged me to sit near him at the table. In a million years, I would have never guessed what he did next.  Underneath his coat he pulled a desk of cards that leaped in his hand as he shuffled.  Was he some sort of magician?

“What’s your name?” he asked.  His voice now had an accent that was maybe Scottish or Irish, I wasn’t sure.

Vaguely I thought, I had great time dancing with a guy I didn’t even know.  “Mercy,” I said still staring in his eyes.  I was mystified by them.

“Do you have a middle name?” he asked not taking his gaze from mine.

It was a strange question but I felt willing to play along.  I lifted the bottle and took another drag without thought.  I could have cursed myself, but it was done.

Maggie knew my middle name, but it was the kind of thing I didn’t think about often.  No one called me by that name, not even my mother.

“Why?” I asked.  I was planning on telling him, but wondered if he would answer.

“I bet everyone calls for Mercy, I want to be unique,” he said with that beautiful lilt of his.

Normally my blood boils at the jokes said at my name’s expense, but it didn’t this time. Was it the beer?  My brain however let me know it was way too soon for me to be affected by alcohol or was it? I answered, “McKayla.”

Reality was, if anyone had bothered to ask that question before, I would have told them because frankly I liked the name a lot more than Mercy.

“Kayla,” he said.  My name rang off his tongue in a cadence like a song.  It was almost mystical as it hung in the air.  Maybe I was getting drunk.

I could have protested his using my middle name, but I didn’t think I’d see him after today.  Least not after this week once we returned home.  So I let it go.

“Yours,” I asked returning the bottle to my lips.

“They call me Rat,” he said, with a smile that showed he was proud of the nickname.

“And,” I said raising my eyebrow.  I really should have been worried at this point.  Who is happy about being called a name labeled for dirty scavengers that hunt in the darkness?

He looked at me curiously then, “And what?”

“What’s your real name? I want to be unique?” I coquetted back using his phrase back on him.  Crap, I was flirting. What was wrong with me?

He laughed. “Ok, I guess that’s fair Kayla. My name is Sebastian.”

I wanted to shorten it like he did mine but Bastian was too close to bastard.  My brain was feeling a bit warm in the cold air.  I took another drink.  I was getting used to the taste.  I should have recognized what was happening to me.

Fanning out the deck he’d been shuffling he said lyrically, “Pick a card.”

Willing to play, I moved my hands over the cards until selecting one near the end.  I wanted to be different than most who would have selected a card from the middle.  “Remember your card then place it back in the deck,” he said.

It was hard to forget the King of Hearts so I slipped it back in the deck easily.  This time I chose my placement to the middle when others might have slapped it close to the top.  I looked into his eyes again wondering what the heck I was doing here.  Something about this boy was winsome, but I had a boyfriend.  He hadn’t actually made a move so maybe I should just enjoy the moment.  I might be stupid to assume he had ulterior motives by bringing up the fact I had a boyfriend.

He shuffled the cards and I found myself watching his hand as he made the cards appear to dance in his hands.  I was captivated with his magic.  Aimlessly he chose a card and showed it to me.  “Is this your card?” he said.

Astounded peered at the King of Hearts and nodded.  “How’d you do that?” I asked.

Winking at me he said, “Wouldn’t you like to know?”  And I did.  I wanted to know more about the boy that sat before me with all his magic.  I absently worried at my lower lip.  His accent was intoxicating but the way he said it reminded me of flirting.  “Tell me, the guy you came in with, is he your boyfriend?”

Taking off guard by his card trick I looked back up at him not sure what to say. I saw something swing in his eyes or maybe I was starting to spin.  “No, he’s not my boyfriend.  He’s my brother,” I said with a misplaced giggle.  What the hell was I doing?  But I couldn’t seem to stop myself and giggled again.

He smirked. “He’s not your brother,” he said ardently, gazing at me with that I know your lying look.  How dare he read me so easily, I thought?

“Yes, he is,” I said empathically and giggled again.  I felt the lie burn in my throat worse than the beer had.  My cheeks felt flushed too.

He put the deck of cards down on the table and grabbed his drink.  Holding it he said, “Fist of all you don’t look alike. Second, I saw the way he looked at you when we danced. No brother would look at his sister that way unless he was demented.”

I took a long swallow of the beer, forgetting again what I was drinking.  This boy was making me nervous and not in a bad way.  I felt stupid lying to him. Should I just say he was my step brother?   At this point I should have mentioned that indeed I did have a boyfriend? But I didn’t. Instead I started giggling again.  Where had that come from?  It had to be the effects of the alcohol.  I shouldn’t be drinking.  Some part of my brain swore to myself I wouldn’t do it again. “He’s my brother and why do you care?” I said stubbornly daring him to refute my claims.

“You’re right? Why should I care if you don’t claim him?” he said. Claim him, I thought.  What was that suppose to mean.

“You should care,” I began.  My words were slurred, so I stopped surprised to hear my voice sound so sloppy.  Then the world began to rotate with a warm fire roasting in my gut.  I hoped I wouldn’t be sick.

He rolled his lip into his mouth with an intake of breath before he spoke.  “Why should I?” he asked apparently not understanding that I hadn’t finished my thought.  What was I going to say?  I realized now that it was time to mention my boyfriend.

“My boyfriend,” I said still slurring.  The ground titled and I felt myself about to fall.  Everything was happening so slowly.  His hand reached out and grabbed my arm to steady me.  His touch lit the flame of desire that had been kindling.  I felt the succubus take control moments too late to stop it.

“See, I knew he was your boyfriend,” he said as if he didn’t notice that something was wrong with me.

Trying to regain control, I managed to say “No.” I tried to stand but I was swaying.  I needed to leave before it did something stupid.

He stood and chuckled under his breath. “Guess you had too much to drink?”

I was dizzy and not in control.  “I don’t drink,” I said, somehow able to muster the words out of my mouth.  I staggered in the direction of the door to the building.  Walking was a bit of a chore.  It felt as if the earth was tilting.

He came to help me up, putting his arms around me to steady me when Flynn burst through the doors.  When I saw him, I laughed out loud as if something was funny.  If I wasn’t beyond tipsy I might have noticed that we were no longer moving.  The two boys eyed each other in a semi standoff.

“Flynn,” I said as if I was so happy to see him.  I reached out my hands to him.

“Mercy, are you ok,” Flynn asked.  He looked genuinely worried.

“Yes,” I said sounding out each syllable. “Great, party,” I added drawing out the phrase.

“I should take you home,” Flynn said.  I couldn’t read his expression because he wasn’t standing in one place or was he?   My equilibrium was shot.  It almost seemed like there was two of him.

“Good night, Kayla,” Sebastian said from behind me.  He’d let me go when Flynn had reached me.  I turned giving him the biggest grin.  I started to walk towards him, letting the blackness grow inside me with purpose.  Flynn hadn’t held on to me.  I reached Sebastian with two steps, laying a hand on his face to draw him to me.  He bent willingly, making my smile grow.

Then, I felt a hand on my arm pulling me back so violently that I twirled back crashing into Flynn’s chest.

“Who’s Kayla?” he said with narrowed eyes.

“I knew you weren’t her brother,” Sebastian said.

I swiveled back to look at Sebastian’s innocent face.  I bit my lip wondering what it would have been like to kiss him.

“She is my sister,” Flynn said. I noticed his voice strained with anger.

“Well, then you’d know that McKayla is her middle name,” Sebastian said clearly happy with himself that he’d proven a point.

“She’s my step sister and my best friend’s girlfriend. So you can back off,” Flynn said drawing an invisible line in the invisible sand with his words.

“If she’s not interested, I’ll will.  But the way she’s looking at me now, I not so sure she’s not interested,” Sebastian said.

“It doesn’t matter what’s she’s feeling because it’s not happening,” Flynn said.

“And who’s to stop me,” Sebastian answered.

“They call him Rat, Flynn.  Maybe you should be worried,” I said ending on a giggle.

Flynn spun me back to him to look in my eyes but the move made my stomach revolt for a second.  I don’t know what he saw but he looked back up at Sebastian.  My phone rang.  As uncoordinated as I was, I managed to pull it out.

“Paul,” I said exasperatedly.  My voice was full of glee as well.

“Hi,” Paul said.  He sounded seriously suspicious through the phone.  He knew me, so I was certain he guessed I was drunk just by me saying his name.

It was so good to hear his voice and I told him so. “I so glad you called.  I missed you so much.  I’m at this great party,” I began in a barrage of words.  Then in a whisper I said, “And I think I may be drunk. What are you doing?” Well, if he hadn’t known, he knew now my current state.

“Mercy,” I heard him say before the phone was plucked out of my hands.

“Paul, it’s me Flynn. Mercy will have to call you back later.” Flynn said then hit the end button the phone.

“Let’s go home,” Flynn said patiently.  He took my hand and walked me not the way we came but to the other side of the building.

“Bye, Sebastian,” I said grinning and blowing air kisses while I was dragged away.  Sebastian stared at me grinning back.  He looked very amused and I felt satisfied that I made him happy.

“Bye, Kayla,” he said and winked at me again.  Coming from his gorgeous face with an expression of self confidence, he looked so wicked doing it.  I clutched my free hand to my chest.  Then he winked again those amazing eyes and the butterflies took flight in my stomach.  He watched me as we went to the other side of the building.  I wanted to run back to him or rather the monster that lived inside of me did.  The blackness was really disappointed it didn’t get to finish what it started.

With Sebastian out of sight, I turned my attention back to Flynn.  I started singing ‘It’s a Beautiful Day’ by U2.  Shaky and woozy, I tried to keep up besides his rapid moving feet, dancing to the unheard beat.  I caught Flynn with a smirk on his handsome face shaking his head.  We came to a stop in front of a motorcycle. Another fit of giggles escaped my throat.

“Mercy, I want to drive you home.  It’s the fastest way but do you think you can hang on?” he asked.

I looked up at him.  The words came like an eruption. “You are so winsome its criminal,” I said.

The way his nose crinkled when he frown just now was so cute. “What the hell is winsome?” he asked.

I smiled up at him, “Its means charming, silly,” I breathed. “You’re just so damn hot,” I said a little more to myself.  I looked away into the night.   In a strange way it was liberating to get that off my chest.

“The word today was coquet,” he said frowning.

I laughed looking back at him.  “I’ve been doing a lot of that lately.  But there is more than one app,” I added.

But he didn’t seem pleased by my admission.  “Mercy, I need you to answer me,” he said, rather calmly despite the look on his face.

“Yeah, sure I can,” I said nearly singing the words to cover my disappointed over his reaction throwing my hands in the air in annoyance.

He put something on my head after gently smoothing stray hairs back from my face.  He was so close, I could feel his breath on my cheek.  If I lifted on my toes, I could kiss him.

But the moment passed when he stepped back away from me.  I didn’t think he had a clue where my thoughts had gone.  A kiss, my subconscious told me.  I needed to kiss someone and soon.

He told me to stay still, but I hadn’t been moving.  I mean the world was moving but I was stood still watching it.   He moved forward to me, taking helmet off my head again.  I blew my bangs up from my face.  His hand was in my hair.  My high ponytail on my head the made the helmet not fit right.  The succubus took the movement as an invitation.  Leaning in I brushed my lips against his.  When he pulled my hair free of the elastic band, he stepped back.

He gave no indication he’d even felt the touch of my lips to my face other than an odd expression I couldn’t read.   I stood there hands at my side not happy he’d ignored my invitation to kiss me.

He hopped on the bike and told me to get on behind him.  I stared at him a long moment pouting before I gave in.  It took some doing.  He held my hand guiding me on behind him.   I finally made it on holding him around his waist tightly like he told me.  I felt every muscle in his abdomen.  It was amazing to be this close to him.  I laid my head on his back melting like I knew girls before me had.

If the world hadn’t been spinning before I got on this darn thing, it certainly was now.  The sensation that I was falling became so great, I held onto him tighter.  In my drunken haze, I couldn’t tell what route we took home and I didn’t care.  Even the road we were on was a mystery.  When the bike stopped, I stumbled off when he told me to.  I thought I might hit the pavement but Flynn was there to steady me.

He was holding me so close a breath away I looked him in the eye.  “You have amazing eyes,” I said.

Frowning at me, he said, “You’re going to hate yourself in the morning for all the nice things you’re saying to me.”

I poked my lip out in a perfect pout. “Why is it that you’ve dated all the girls in school except me?  Am I ugly?”  It was something I secretly wondered even when he kissed me for the first time playing spin the bottle.  Clearly, I wasn’t thinking at all.  Whatever popped in my mind I simply said and couldn’t stop myself.

He branded me with his feverish hands on either side of my face.  The darkness filled my eyes.  Taking two steps forward, my succubus firmly in control again was going press my lips against his kissable mouth.  He spoke and I felt him close but he spoke to me.  “You’re not ugly,” he said.

I thought that might be all he would say.   My hands wrapped around his wrist with his hands still on my face.  What was inside me planned to yank him forward and force his face closer than the hair thin line that separated us.

“And I haven’t dated all the girls in school,” he declared.   Leaning forward he sat me down on a cobble step that made the path to the front door.  He stood up and blew a long exasperated breath into the hand that covered his mouth.  He turned his back to me and took a couple of steps forward.

A thought occurred to me that he might be walking back to the bike.  The succubus still in control decided to lay us back on the cool ground in frustration.  I was glad in a way not to be in control.  My head hadn’t yet cleared the beer from my system.  I was warm atop the bare and smooth cobbled stones of the walkway.  It felt good releasing all the heat from my body.

“No, you don’t date ugly girls and you never tried to date me,” I said steadily.  I hadn’t noticed I no longer slurred every words but only a few.  I began to figure out I was in control of one part of my body even though I’d like to think otherwise.

He didn’t respond right away.  I wasn’t even sure he heard me until he came back and sat beside me.  Expelling another long breath he said, “I guess it doesn’t matter since you probably won’t remember this tomorrow anyway.”

“Remember what?” I asked.  The neurons in my brain still weren’t firing correctly.

“Exactly,” he replied.

“Why, Flynn. Why not me?” I said watching the swirling stars in the sky.  It had been a question I wondered not because I wanted to date him, but out of insecurity. I needed to know if I was dateable.  Sure I shouldn’t care because I had Luke but the beer had loosened my tongue.

I couldn’t see his face when he spoke.  He looked straight out into the night or maybe his eyes were closed. “You’re the kind of girl a guy can fall for,” he said then paused before speaking again. “And you of all people know that love’s not possible for people like you and me.”

I didn’t say anything else.  His voice had seemed quite sad and resigned.  What I should have heard was that I should also be resigned to never being in love.  But I didn’t hear that.  Maybe it was the beer or maybe I was too optimistic about my future.  It would only be a matter of time before that my sanguine view would be crushed.

“I need to get you upstairs,” he said.

I giggled still feeling a bit drunk. “I don’t think I can move.”

He watched me with hidden things in his eyes he hadn’t said.  No longer grinning I said, “Why won’t you kiss me?”  I kept my eyes intent on his waiting for his answer.

“Because you’ll hate me tomorrow,” he said with no hesitation.  I wasn’t so sure about that at the moment.  Standing he lifted me easily and cradled me in his arms as if I didn’t weigh a single pound.  In his arms it felt strangely intimate.

Leaning my head back, I watched the stars go by.  “Boy, you sure are strong. No wonder all the girls love you Flynn,” I said my giggles back.  I closed my eyes enjoying the tender sensations of being in his arms.

Whispering like he didn’t want me to hear he said, “Not the right one.”

I let my eyes flutter open.  The world was in full color again and our movements up the walkway made my world spin more out of control.  I wrapped my arms around his neck to hang on.  I closed my eyes again. When next I opened my eyes everything was dark and I felt something soft under me.

“Flynn,” I called out.

Out of the darkness, I heard him say, “Get some sleep, Mercy.”

Chapter Eighteen

dissipate (v.) to disappear, cause to disappear

I woke to a mouth that tasted like sandpaper.  My head pounded to a jungle beat by a brick on the inside of my head.  When I was finally able to get my legs to work, I slid them over the side of the bed.   What was more distressing was that I wore no pants.  I didn’t remember removing them.  In fact, I still had on the shirt from last night.  However, my throbbing head and cotton mouth were my immediate concerns at this point.

In my bathroom, I clamped my hands over my head when the burning bright lights I flick on.  The curtains in my room had been drawn so this shock of light sent a searing pain in my head.

After splashing water on my face, I bent my head and drank from the faucet.  Normally that would seem gross to me, but I was desperate.  Beggars can’t be choosers.  I didn’t foresee myself going downstairs until I got myself together.  A couple of quick gulps and I proceeded to take care of my next immediate needs.  With brushed teeth and one long shower later, I dressed for the day.

Still not sure I was ready to face the world, I checked my phone to realize I slept through the morning.  It was early afternoon.  Slowly, I took some time to unpack before I was brave enough to go downstairs to face Flynn or my mom.

Flynn, what was I going to say to him?  Unlike everything I heard about being drunk, I didn’t find any of it true.  I hadn’t thrown up or forgotten all the words that come from my mouth.  But then again maybe I hadn’t drunk enough for that.  There was no need to ponder because as of now, I’ve sworn myself against alcohol.  What would I tell Luke?

Bravely, I headed downstairs I’d become conscious that I was alone.  In the kitchen, I toasted a bagel and turned on the television to stop the pestering silence.  But as one would expect when you’re bored, I couldn’t find anything to watch.  Curiosity led me down to the private boat slip at the lake in front of the house.  The day was unusually warm so I wore my bikini under a long tee shirt and shorts thinking about laying out for some late season rays.  Just maybe I could get that golden tan Luke seemed to master all year around.  Speaking of delectable boyfriends, I brought my cell phone to call him and Maggie.  Even still, a feeling of foreboding was like a pressing weight on my chest.

In my cutoff shorts I brought to bum around the house, I felt like a hypocrite.  Melody, the red haired shifter, had been wearing similar shorts last night.   Granted it wasn’t this warm then, but she wasn’t human.  Maybe her body temperature was different then mine.  Nearing the water, I heard laughter and splashing water.  Who would take a swim in fall?  Ok, it was warm, but not really that warm.

I should have expected it but seeing it, I was still astonished.  Flynn was in the water with some giggling blond who at this moment had her arms around his neck.  I couldn’t see her face because her back was to me.  My heart began to thud frantically in my chest before I could turn away.  Flynn searched my eyes.  Expressionless, he said nothing but his silence was enough for the girl to turn around.  Who could blame her?  He’d stopped paying attention to her to stare at me.  I wanted to flee my confused feelings over seeing Flynn with a girl after my admission to him last night.  But my legs wouldn’t move.  She wiped her face free of the lake water to get a better look at me.  She turned back to Flynn like I was meaningless.  From what I could tell in the brief glance at her, she was definitely his type, attractive and painfully so.

“Is that your sister?” she asked as if I wasn’t standing there.  So I decided to oblige her by beginning my getaway.

“Mercy, right?” I heard her ask in reply to Flynn’s silence.  Stupidly, I turned back. I didn’t say anything but the move was clear that she held my attention. She turned back to me.  “Everyone’s going to the camp to watch scary movies, you should come.”

The last thing I wanted to do was to go back to the camp.  I’d made a fool of myself not only in front of Flynn but Sebastian too.  I wasn’t up to seeing the guy my succubus no doubted wanted.  I was certain of that just by the way I could feel it stir inside of me at the thought of his name.  Funny though I heard myself say, “Yeah, I’ll be there.”

For whatever reason I needed to show this girl that she didn’t bother me.  I’d given Nina the benefit of the doubt and look how that turned out.  I walked away with my head held high.  Not just for her benefit,  I wouldn’t give Flynn the satisfaction that seeing him with this girl on some level disturbed me even though it shouldn’t have.  I needed to call Luke.  Surely talking to him would put everything back into perspective.

Back at the house, in the safety of my room, I tried to call Maggie first.  She didn’t answer, so I checked my messages next.  She’d left me several.  The gist of which was that she’d gotten in touch with Paul.  She’d made him to promise to call me.  Crap, I think he had.  I closed my eyes laying back listening to her tell me to promise and call her back no matter the time.  Then she said that if I didn’t call that night, I wouldn’t be able to talk to her until late Sunday or Monday because she was at a family gathering at her grandmothers.  It was her nana’s birthday and family rules meant that all cell phones would be confiscated at the door.  Well, I guess that explained why Maggie hadn’t answered.

Her message had reminded me about Paul.  I vaguely remembered talking to him, but Flynn had interrupted.  So, I dialed him next not thinking before I could talk myself out of it.  His message came on.  I left a brief message apologizing for last night and asking him to call.  Then I dialed Luke.

“Hey,” he said.

“Hi,” I said shyly.  I couldn’t help it.  It was good to hear his voice.

“What have you been up to?” he asked.  I wondered if he’d spoken to Flynn.  No matter, honesty was the best policy.

“Flynn took me to a creepy camp where surprisingly there was a party,” I said.

He laughed. “I heard you got drunk.”  So Flynn had already told him.  I wondered how much detail.  But his voice seemed light and happy.  He certainly didn’t seem angry with me.

“It wasn’t on purpose,” I said trying to defend myself.

“Flynn was pretty vague on how you managed to get drunk with your unbreakable no drinking policy.  You want to share,” he said.

I didn’t expect Flynn to spare any details, yet I had a feeling Flynn didn’t mention Sebastian.  I wasn’t sure if I should either.  What were the rules when you were dating?  With no experience and with Maggie out of reach, I didn’t know what to do. Honesty.

“Someone offered to get me a drink.  Extremely thirsty I took what I thought was water. Foolishly, I drank it l before I realized it was beer.  Next thing I know I was drunk which didn’t take much.”

“I guess you’ll know better next time,” he said. “Wish I could have seen it. I imagine it won’t happen again.”  Well, he had that right.  But I moved on.

“What’d you do last night?” I asked quickly wanting to change the subject before he asked me more questions.

“I hung out over Brent’s,” he said. “Brent actually had time to hang out with Maggie busy last night.”   Maggie had been out doing something for me but I didn’t tell him that.

“What are you going to do tonight?” I asked.

Without hesitation he said, “Dreaming about you?” His voice was softer than it had been when he spoke.

I smiled then giggled. “Yeah, right.  I bet you say that to all the girls.”

I couldn’t see his facial expressions through the phone but the tone of his voice made everything crystal clear.  It was low and full of meaning.  “I never dreamed of any girl before you.”

I licked my lips knowing he couldn’t see.  I cleared my throat before saying, “I doubt that,” I said huskily.

“You’d be surprised,” he mused.

Feeling more flirtatious I added, “Would I?”

He breath the word, “Yes,” and it sent tingles through me.

With my phone held to my ear, the pillow around my head, it wasn’t a substitute for his arms being around me.  I felt the loss of his physical presence just hearing his voice.    I could almost see his face and wished I had his picture. “You know what I don’t have?” I asked.

“What is that?” he questioned back.

“Your picture,” I said using my own softer playful tone.

“Your pretty face is all I see when I close my eyes,” he responded.

He had all the words that I didn’t.  “A picture is worth a thousand words.”

“What about the real thing?” he asked.

“Priceless,” I breathed.

He laughed.   “God, I wish you were here.”

“Me too,” I said.  “But you don’t have to be alone tonight.”

“Are you offering to come back?”

“I would, but I don’t have a car,” I said.  Not giving him a chance to reply I added. “Really, you should hanging out with Brent again?”

With Maggie out of town I was sure Brent would hang out with him again.  “Brent went upstate to New York.  Jay is having a get together but Nina might come.   So most likely I’ll stay home.”

I didn’t feel at that moment that I deserved him.  He didn’t say it, but I was sure he was avoiding her because of me.  Considering what I almost did with Sebastian last night.  “You should go. I trust you,” I said quickly, before I could stop myself.  Despite my dark monster that lived inside me, I did.

Silence on the other end had me question my words.  Was he going to take me up on my offer?  “I wish I could be with you at this very moment,” he said.

I didn’t question it.  I simply said, “Me too.”

I needed air after my chat with Luke.  Remembering a bit of my conversation with Flynn last night regarding love when it came to people like us, I hoped it wasn’t true.  Deep down, I knew love would come at a price though.

Stepping out on the front deck, I turned to see Flynn was in the hot tub.  At first I was about to go talk to him.  I didn’t see the blond and thought she’d probably gone home.  For some weird reason I hoped he’d be the friend I needed like I used to have in Paul.  I felt our relationship had made a turn like brother and sister with the exception of last night.  He of all people would understand my troubles.  I needed to learn more about what I was. He could get me the real answers I needed.

Before I could take a step forward, the blond broke the surface from beneath the water.  Flynn’s eyes opened at that moment.  All I could think was ‘what an ass’.   He saw me before I could flee again.  His eyes locked with mine with utter satisfaction.   Was he trying to pay me back somehow for last night?  I turned on my heels and stormed in the house.  Didn’t he have a girlfriend?  Just when I could see through that façade of his, he did something to remind me of the arrogant ass he was.  I slammed the door behind me.  Ok, closing the door like that was a bit childish.  But I’d needed him and he was busy up to no good as usual.  He’d even thrown it in my face with the look he’d given me.

Upstairs in my bathroom, I got ready to go out.  I was going somewhere. Why I was so mad?  It wasn’t like Flynn was my boyfriend.  He never pretended to be anything but what he was.  Truthfully, it was purely selfish.  I just thought he could be a friend.  How could I trust him with my secrets based on how he treated others?

I walked downstairs dressed to go out.  Feeling like I had something to proved, I dressed to kill.  Wearing a scoop neck top that gave a view of peaks and valleys with super tight jeans, I was sure to get attention tonight.  Vaguely I was aware that I hadn’t really seen my mom and David in twenty four hours.  They’d apparently been having themselves a vacation that didn’t really include us.  I guess I was ok with that.

I looked up when I heard Flynn’s door open.  I watched him exit his room with the blond.  I turned my head determined not to be mad.  It wasn’t my business.

“Hey Mary,” the blond said.

I wanted to hit her.  Unmistakably, she was getting in a dig by messing up my name.  I didn’t think she was that dumb to forget so quickly.  I had to focus.  A part of me wanted to slap the smile off her overconfident face. But, I wasn’t a violent person by nature. I almost used my SAT words on her like I did Flynn.  But I was certain she wouldn’t have a clue what I was accomplishing by doing so.  “It’s Mercy,” I said curtly.

“Mercy, this is Bridgette,” Flynn said.  I had to give him points for first looking at me in my eye before slipping south to my normally covered cleavage.  Bridgette’s face turned to a frown.  So, she knew we weren’t blood relatives.  His eyes came back to my face when he said, “I didn’t get a chance to introduce you earlier.”

“Hi,” I was able to choke out.  Although I was pleased that my outfit got the response I was looking for, I was still pissed at the girl’s total disrespect for me.

“So are you going with us?” Bridgette

“Yeah, when are you planning to leave?” I asked, so it wouldn’t seem like I was waiting even though I was.

“Well, actually I am a bit hungry after our swim,” she said, giving me the eye to tell me she meant more than just the swim.  All I could hear in my head was the word bitch.   “So maybe we should eat first.  I heard you were a great cook,” Bridgette continued.

I had to pause before I could tell her there was no way in hell I was going to cook for her. “I’m sure Flynn could put something together for you,” I said through a gritted teeth smile.  I met Flynn’s eyes.  He had a grace to seem embarrassed by her comment.  He’d better have felt that way.

“Well that’s ok.  I really shouldn’t eat much, I am on a diet,” she said.  My first thought was that she looked like she could really use a milkshake before she blew away in a light wind.   My second thought was the simple word bitch.  She was testing me.  I had an urgent desire to claw her eyes out.  But thankfully I kept my hands to myself.  I also managed to hold my tongue.  Her comment for food was just to see if she could get me to jump hadn’t worked.  I didn’t know this girl but I disliked her with every fiber of my being.

“Are you ready Flynn?” she asked.  Not bothering to look at me.  I could only imagine the fluttering lashes she gave him.  I’d seen too many girls at school do the same thing when it came to him.

Instead of answering her he turned to me and said, “Mercy, are you ready?”

I couldn’t help feeling a victory in that. “Yeah,” I said with more enthusiasm that I should have.

“Alright then, let’s get a move on.” Bridgette said dryly, trying to take back the control.

Flynn opened the door for us. Bridgette walked out and he held it while I made my way through.  He whispered softly to me, “Ignore her.”

Bridgette parents were obviously high rollers.  She drove us to the abandoned camp in her red Mercedes Roadster.   I had to be impressed.  She wasn’t very smart though.  Her car only sat two.  Therefore, I ended up sitting in Flynn’s lap for the ride over.   She and both weren’t please.  But we’d both agreed that was better than the alternative of us sitting in each other lap.  Flynn stuck between a rock and a hard place in more ways than one, kept his hands at his sides not touching me.  It was clear, he was very unsure of how to handle this situation.  I’d left my hair down tonight and laughed to myself.  Bridgette’s convertible top was down.  The wind kept whipping my hair in his face.

Walking through the door of the abandoned mess hall, I wanted to get away from the Barbie queen.  Boldly, I scanned the room for a familiar friendly face and came up with only one.   Enthusiastically, I walked over to Chris and his friends.  All smiles showing lots of teeth,

Baring my pearly whites, I said “Hi.”

In turn, they greeted me in wonderment except, Chris.  We’re He didn’t seem taken aback by my sudden friendliness.  Instead, he eyed me up and down before he spoke.  “I hope you like Jason.  Be prepared for a movie marathon.

“Jason Voorhees the Friday the 13th serial killer,” I said.

“That be the one,” Chris said raising the remote to start the movie.

“Hey, have they named the killer of those girls yet,” some said to my right.  I did see who but the voice was male.

“I’m not sure, I think,” a girl’s voice began.  I didn’t hear the rest because I needed to find a seat and she’d was speaking softly.  My movements as well as the movie credits drowned her voice out.  The shifters occupied the single sofa in the place.  It was a huge sofa that held the lot of them.  It located in firmly front of a large flat screen.  I moved to sit on the adjacent empty love seat.  Not as many were here tonight at least not yet.  I didn’t remember seeing either piece of furniture yesterday.

Other of people had chosen to sit on the floor in front of the shifters.  I leaned back hoping I could have this seat by myself.  To ensure this possibility, I’d rested my legs across the open space.  I come but not really because I wanted to be here.  The pretty in pink mannequin had unwittingly started a fight with me and I wouldn’t back down.

“Let’s get the movie started.” Chris announced.  I smelled popcorn with melted butter but I didn’t make a move to get any.  I was afraid I might lose my seat.  The lights went out and I had no idea where Flynn was until he came over to me.

He leaned over the side of the loveseat to whisper in my ear.  “Hey, I’m going to head out for a moment. I’ll be back but if you want to go home before then, Chris will take you.”

I wouldn’t have come if he was just going to drop me off.  I was about to ask him where he was going when Bridgette and another girl moved in my line of vision.  When he stood they followed him. Damn it, two girls and Flynn leaving together.  My imagination wasn’t up to thinking what they were going to do.  I rolled my eyes and slightly shook my head.

Sebastian wasn’t around either.  A familiar melody began to play so I tuned to the television to see a classic slasher movie fitting for our surroundings.  Maybe not movie etiquette but I pulled my phone out so see if I’d gotten any calls.  I hadn’t.

“Beautiful, Kayla,” a voice called me from behind. Turning like I had whiplash, I leaned back immediately drowned into unbelievable blue eyes of Sebastian.

There was an unmistakable wickedness in his eye.  My mouth went dry.  He was a temptation I’d hoped to avoid tonight.   “I have popcorn and drinks,” he said.

Alarm must have registered on my face because he added, “Soda tonight.”  Handing me a can of Coke, he moved to sit next to me.  After a very brief moment, I moved my legs giving him room.  This definitely wasn’t a good idea.  He smelled of vanilla of all things making my mouth water.  Sitting, he handed me the bowl of popcorn.  I took it and placed it between us drawing the invisible line he shouldn’t cross.

The first up was a Jason kill-kill-die-die movie.  Apparently the plan was to watch several sequels in marathon fashion.  As a group we laughed at some parts and the girls squealed at others.  It’s always classic how the next victim calls out in the silence announcing their present to the monster that lurks in the darkness.  But other parts showed just how demented Jason was.  Girls screamed while boys snickering and high fiving other guys.  Jason liked to kill unlucky couples when their pants down.  Sex wasn’t something I needed a reminder of sitting next to the guy who calls himself Rat.

By the end of the movie I had my head in the arm resting with my eyes closed tight.  Not for the reasons one might think.  I was fighting an internal battle with my unseen demon.  Between all the kissing on screen and the paired off couples in the room, the succubus wanted nothing more than to jump the guy that sat next to me.  He certainly was fabulous eye candy, but honestly I wasn’t interested.  The battle for control was on.

It only took Sebastian’s hand on my arm for me to lose control.  The heat from it branded me.  I was surprised by the warmth I felt through my clothes.  Looking up into his eyes, I watched a smile cross his face as if he was pleased with my demon’s victory over me.  But that was impossible.

“Are you ready to go home,” he said.  There was just the hint of a twinkle like a shooting star in his eyes.

The succubus nodded despite my clawing at the mist like creature that controlled my movements like a robot.  I found my body following him silently out of the room.  No one even noticed us leaving.  As we neared the exit, my heart dropped.  I’d hoped maybe Chris would have seen me leaving.  Maybe somehow he would have said something so I could gain control.  But he and Melody were quite involved in seeking each other’s tonsils at the moment.  Shaking my head on the inside, I really didn’t understand that relationship.

Outside in the crisp night air when Sebastian let go of my arm, I felt some of my control return.  Was it coincidence that my clawing at the vapor beast inside had worked?  Back in the driver’s seat for the moment, I didn’t take any chances.  I would avoid any more skin to skin connection between us.

“I saw your brother leave with company,” he said giving me a wink letting me know that he still didn’t believe Flynn was my brother.

I smiled at him. “So you believe me now?” I asked only based on his use of the word brother.

“No, but I thought I could walk you home, if you’re ready to go” he said.

“Thanks,” I said.  To keep my control, I kept a few small paces to the side of him.  There was something teasingly magnetic about him besides his good looks.

The only sounds of the night were an owl hooting in the background, I struck up a conversation about the movie we just watched.  Lightening the mood might help ease the temptation he was for me or rather the beast inside me.  Maybe not the best topic, but it was the obvious one.  I asked him who he thought would win in a battle between Jason Voorhees and Michael Myers.  This should certainly be a mood killer, right?  I led off with my total support for Jason.  I backed up my choice with a rundown of Jason’s victory over Freddy Krueger.

“Jason, hands down,” I said after giving him a quick assessment of his crimes.

He laughed. “You are so wrong. Michael Myers would totally best him.”

“Jason so beat Freddy Krueger, a demon from hell,” I reiterated.  Then I realized the comment I made.  I felt like an idiot.  I stared straight ahead not sure what to say other than I was sorry.

“Freddy was way to impulsive which made him weak,” he chimed in not missing a beat.  He hadn’t noticed my faux pas.  “Jason’s mind is that of a child in a man’s body with red-hot vengeance that courses through his very blood.  With his undeveloped brain, he only fights with blind rage.”

“That’s what makes him a formable opponent,” I argued, happy he’d let my comment slide.

“It what makes him weak,” he said.  “Michael however is psychopath and is completely insane with no moral compass.  His crimes aren’t of passion but are born from pure evil which makes him unbeatable.  He would eclipse Jason in the first scene of the movie.”

He surprised me with his classic horror knowledge.  His arguments were finely tuned and almost scary that he could understand the mind of a killer.

“Ok, so they both have major points in their favor.  Jason has twelve movies to his credit including one in space.  Michael only has nine.”

“It only took nine to get it right.  They severely went wrong with that space movie,” he said.

We laughed and sided stepped declaring a winner.  “Well, I think they both could go in alone and wipe out the Texas Chainsaw family.”

He laughed. “Agreed. They were a bunch of yahoos that used their remote location as means for victory.”

“Jason has proved adaptable to his environment. He survived space.”

“Yeah, only because he doesn’t have a brain,” he said.

We laughed some more.  We’d stopped for a moment laughing at our conclusion, when he looked at me.  I mean he really looked at me to the point the smiling and laughter died.  The heat between us was back in an instant.  His hand lifted and I took a few steps back in retreat.  If I had one, I would have waved a white flag for mercy.  Damn, even I can’t get away from the many uses of my name.

A sharp exhale of breath left my lungs when I inadvertently stepped into the rough bark of a tree.  With his hand still extended he reached me.  Lightly, he tucked a few wild strands of hair behind my head.  His touch was soft and tentative.  Not pulling away, fingers stroked down my cheek leaving a trail of whispered possibilities of what could be.  And just like that, I lost control again.

It was always strange when I sat in the passenger’s seat of my own body.  Fear rolled through me.  I was really afraid this time that the succubus would do something I wouldn’t be able to live with.  I felt like a traitor.  What was in me wasn’t like dual personality?  When the succubus took control I still knew and felt everything that happened to me.  I felt her desire like it was my own.  But really in some way, was it my own?  But rooted inside me was the girl who didn’t know she was a monster.  She clung to ideals and values.  This girl, me, felt like I was betraying Luke on every level.

He hissed out a breath. With a faint curve of his lips, he invaded my personal space.  I had only invited one other to occupy that space.  A part of me urged me to give in and close my eyes.  I could almost pretend it was Luke.  But he didn’t smell like Luke.  Luke smell soapy clean and fresh.  Sebastian smelled exotic and spicy.  Uncontrollably, my hand shot forward pressing against his rock solid chest.  He rolled his lip in his mouth and my body gasped.  Heat rolled over me.  The succubus was totally excited with the prospect of being next to this boy I knew next to nothing about.  The feelings were intense, like they were almost mine.

“I see you through your eyes,” he said.  I wondered what he meant but had no time to ponder. He leaned in to the point his lips lightly made contact with mine.  Just then a twig popped loudly, just beyond the tree.  He stiffened underneath my hand.  His lips grazed my cheek when he turned his head.  Only a breath of time past when he whispered in my ear, “Shh,” he said.

With his body pressed against mine, I didn’t dare move.  I felt the urge to reach around him and pull him closer.  Thankfully, the succubus was a lover not a fighter and let me have back the control at the hint of danger.  Another snap of a twig and a crunch of dead leaves had my blood racing through my veins.  Staring without moving his head, I was certain he’d seen something.  Slowly, I turned my head in that direction.  No more than fifty paces to our right stood a black and gray wolf.

Its eyes were pure gold.  The growl was barely audible before it bared its teeth.  A quick snap of jaws made its intention at violence clear.  Sebastian whose mouth hadn’t moved far from my face even as I turned said, “When I say run, run.”

I nodded.  I was not a wilderness girl, so I took his word for it.  Something in the back of my head said that running was a bad idea.  Predators smelled fear and running would send them on a hunt for you, but I didn’t argue.  He must have had a plan.  So when he took a step back from me saying run at the same time, I did.

I wasn’t a track star.  But running was a big part of softball, especially for stealing a base or sliding home.  My heart thudded as I ran without care of stray branches and other hidden obstacles in my path.  I stayed as best I could on the slightly worn path hoping I would run into the lake house without getting myself lost.

I heard the unmistakable sound of breathing that wasn’t mine.  Slowing didn’t seem to be the best option.  So I turned my head slightly to the left.  Far off in that direction I saw another figure running to possibly catch up with me and I swore.  The figure was dressed in all black and looked to be human.  Based on the color of its clothes, I knew it wasn’t Sebastian.  He’d been wearing black jeans, but his shirt color was a royal blue that even in the dark matched his eyes.  I stifled a scream but kept running.  My only hope was to out run whoever it was.  My lungs burned as I drank in brisk cold air.

I nearly choked on a harsh intake of breath, when Sebastian materialized in front of me.  He hadn’t been there but now he was standing in front of me.  I couldn’t stop my forward progress in time not to ram into him.  His arms wrapped around me and we fell backwards.  I waited to hit the ground but we didn’t.  An empty void surrounded me for about minute before we landed on my bed him on top of me.

It was surreally disconcerting to fall down Alice’s rabbit hole.  If I’d been human I might have asked what the hell happened.  Instead, I scrambled away trying to understand it on my own.  My ears popped.  So, I reached my hands to cover them with my head darting about.  My scrambling paid off when my feet hit the ground beside my bed.  I lifted myself up and away from him.  Something flashed in his eyes.  They shined in the darkness.  He almost looked hurt by my fear.  That expression was gone before I could explore it further.  What was left was emptiness.  I opened my mouth to speak.  “You, we just dissipated and reappeared,” I stumbled the words out.

His voice filled the space of my room. “I’ll have to explain later,” he said and vanished into thin air.

Ok, I admit I was totally weirded out.  But in conclusion, I had my answer. Sebastian wasn’t human.  I was starting to believe any gorgeous guy to real to be true wasn’t human.  Maybe that’s what was behind the ‘too good to be true’ phrase.  Flynn was gorgeous.  He wasn’t human.  The only other guy at my school with that inhuman beauty was Jay.  I would have to study him once I got to school next week to test this theory.

Don’t get me wrong, Luke and even Paul were hot in their own way but not over the top the way Flynn, Sebastian and Jay were.  Still sitting on the floor I felt like the demon whore I was even though I was still a virgin.  I had inadvertently licked my lips while thinking of the hot guys I knew.  The word in my brain was yummy.  I pounded a fist on the floor.

What I should be thinking about is the possible attack by a shifter on me.  I wasn’t that sure though that it wasn’t a real wolf.  I hadn’t done anything to warrant an attack from the werewolves.

What about the human for lack of any other description who appeared to be chasing me?  I scolded the fearful succubus who cowered at the sight of danger.  What good was it to be supernatural if I wasn’t able to protect myself?

I curled in a ball on the floor unable to move.  My life was spiraling out of control.  I needed a friend.  I couldn’t call Maggie because once I censored all the unnatural events; there wouldn’t be much of a story.  Paul had been avoiding me, so I couldn’t call him.  My mom wouldn’t even help me protect the world from myself except to say stay away from boys.  That was an impossibility at this point.  I wasn’t going to give Luke up.

My mind went numb.  I tried to find a rational place inside my head.  Not sure how long I lay there, I allowed myself to be folded into Flynn’s arms when the door opened.  He pulled me close while we sat on the floor.  I was nearly in his lap.  He rocked me while silent tears fell on my pity party.  Maybe I shouldn’t have let him hold me with my lack of willpower should the succubus rise, but I need it.  For now, he didn’t even ask what was wrong.  In many ways I was grateful for that.

Chapter Nineteen

contentious (adj.) having a tendency to quarrel or dispute

The mood in the kitchen was quite frigid.  My mother presence was like an icy breeze.  She wasn’t happy with me still.  My flippant remarks that first evening still stuck in her craw.  I sat on the bar stool while she toasted bagels and scrambled eggs.  Breakfast was one of her best areas of culinary talents. Apparently she was showing off to her future husband that she could find her way around the kitchen.  But David and Flynn hadn’t yet made an appearance.

“So tell me about your boyfriend,” my mom said.  I wondered how long she’d been stewing on that bit of information Flynn had let leak.  I saw the pulse in her neck throb and her muscles tense.  Her anger was brewing like the coffee in the kettle to a bitter crescendo.  I could envision the steam that would soon puff out her ears.  I knew it was coming but decided to face it head on.

“He’s really nice,” I said, picking up a toasted bagel from the serving plate she had perched on the counter in front of me.  After slathering cream cheese from the tub across it, I bit into it before she could ask me any other questions.  She looked at me like I was being rude or something but I didn’t know what she expected me to say.

“Cute,” she said.  Frown marked crossed her brows with obvious tension.  “I thought we talked about this,” she said, giving me the mom look that used to frighten me into submission as a child.  It did nothing now.

“We did, but you left a lot out.  Seems Flynn’s done fine with the knowledge of what he is,” I said.  I watched her looking for a sign that she felt bad for withholding information, but I found none.  Her face still held a grimace.  In an act of defiance, I mimicked her expression.

“It was different for him, Mercy.  He needed to know and you didn’t,” she said.  That only fueled my fire.

“So I should live a sheltered life forever for you,” I said, maybe a little glibly.

“You have no idea,” she said.  Her tone was sharp like ice daggers directed at me.  She spoke around clinched teeth.

I stood up from the stool feeling overly disgruntled. “You’re right.  I have no idea. Instead of wasting time being contentious with you, I’m taking matters in my own hands.  A few untested experiments should help me to figure things out on my own.  Who knows maybe I won’t kill anyone in the process,” I yelled, tossing my hands in the air.  I looked up on my way out of the house.  I needed fresh air.  My gaze crested Flynn’s bare chest when he opened his bedroom door.  I didn’t need to see his brow furrowed to know he wondered what was going on.

I proceeded to open and slam the front door with perfect satisfaction.  Ostensibly, I was getting real good at closing doors.  I couldn’t understand her.  Never questioning her authority in all these years had made her complacent.  This week, I realized our relationship was based on her omission of the truth.  So much she’s hidden from me, I didn’t think I could even trust her.  It was like she was a stranger.  Our relationship was now nothing more than contentious.

Marching down the cobble path, I headed directly for the woods.  After last night, you’d think I steer clear especially alone.  But I didn’t want to be found.  I didn’t want her to come after me.  Reality was that it would most likely David not my mother who’d come after me.  He would reason with me and I’d find myself apologizing.

Stomping up the hill off the path without any care to where I was going was my declaration at just how mad I was.  I didn’t think about getting lost.  I just wanted to get away.  Stopping, I turned in circles after an indiscriminate amount of time.  Damn, I was truly and utterly lost.  I reached for my phone realizing too late I didn’t have it.

Plopping down in the on the harden earth I sat where I was glad there was still a lot of light.  I felt the hot stream of silent tears stroll down my cheeks warming them from the frigid air.  I let out the hurt feelings I had for my mom.  Why couldn’t she be there for me like she’d been what seemed like so long ago.

Taking several deep breaths pushing the tears back, I decided I would head back down the same way I came.  At the very least I should reach the lake at some point.  From there, I should be able to find my way back.  In the meantime, I let the tears that still swelled in my eyes fall.  I was long overdue for a true cry over my life.

Was it unreasonable for me to want a life?  Is it so farfetched to assume my mom would have my best interest at heart?  She didn’t even tell me about David until he’d basically asked her to marry him.  She could have mentioned somewhere along the way she was dating.  She didn’t have to tell me who.  If she wanted to keep secrets, so would I.

“Mercy,” I heard my name being called from below.  I recognized the voice.  It wasn’t David.  It was his son.

“Flynn,” I said just above normal volume.  I wasn’t sure if anyone else was looking for me too.

I had my head in my hands pressed against my knees.  My legs were tucked to my chest.  Again I pushed the tears back.  I wouldn’t cry in front of Flynn. Sensations like lift off passed across my shoulders as Flynn put his arm around me.  For the second time in less than a day, he was comforting me.  This time he didn’t give me respite.

“You can get through this,” he said.  His tone was light and caring.  But instead I turned my anger on him.  He couldn’t understand what I was going through.

I shrugged him off and stood moving far away from him.  He now wore a shirt with a graphic I didn’t get.  At least he wore a shirt.  No telling where this conversation would have gone if he hadn’t been.  “Easy for you to say, the playboy who sleeps with two girls at once with a girlfriend at home, while I can’t kiss a guy without killing him.”

I moved again so I wasn’t facing him. Out of frustration, I dug my fingers through my hair stopping with my palms on my forehead.

“You don’t know why or what I did,” he said whirling on me.  He tone wasn’t pleasant.  I had to wonder why he had the audacity to get angry at me.  “It’s easy for you to accuse.  The girl who doesn’t need to take life from someone else to survive,” he said angrily getting on his feet dusting off his jeans.

“That’s right, I don’t need it to survive, yet I’m the dangerous one that can’t be told how to protect my boyfriend from me,” I said shouting back at him while pointing my finger.

He of course pointed back.  “This from a girl who doesn’t know how good she has it.”

We weren’t listening to each other I would realize when I had a chance to replay this conversation.  Instead, I stepped towards him in the heat of the moment.  “Oh, poor me from the guy who has a girl go deep sea diving in the hot tub.”

He moved in closer.  “You sound jealous,” he said with folded hands not three feet away from me.

“I am but not the reasons you think,” I said.  “I want to kiss my boyfriend and not be afraid he’s going to die.  Something you’ve obviously mastered.”

“So you want me to teach you,” he said voice still raised hands now at his sides in fist.

I dropped my hands into fist and yelled a firm, “Yes,” in a hiss.

Too quickly before I could blink he was in front of me. His hands fisted in my hair while he leaned towards me.  Foolishly, I closed my eyes in anticipation of his kiss.

His voice was still a growl of anger barely comprehendible.  “Step One,” he said with his breath caressing my skin. “Take control from the start.”

Stupidly I lost control from his body so near.  His flaming temper poured off him warming me.  In the lingering moments, I played back his words trying to get a hold of myself.  At first I wasn’t sure what he meant but as he held there that familiar part of me began to grow and want maybe even need.

“I feel it,” I whispered.  I guess I still had control of my words.  My voice was raspy from yelling taking in large gulps of cold air that still burned my lungs.

“Good,” he said.  His voice was calmer but a hint of frustration still lingered.  “Control it,” he said.

“How?” I asked weakly feeling myself loosing it.

“Stop me,” he said coming closer.  My eyes flew open.  I didn’t think there was a closer without his mouth on mine, but apparently there was.  Degrees of space and time seem too stagnant as he descended.  Logically, I knew this was wrong but it was that other part that hungered for Flynn desperately.  It was a feeling I was sure all those before me felt.

His lips met my flesh and it was my cheek not my lips.  Somehow I’d managed to turn in the nick of time.  I think it was the thought of his other conquest, rather than my determination.

“Good,” he repeated, this time murmuring it in my ear.  The heat of his words against my ear and my neck made my knees buckle.  He was quick, much quicker than a human should be.  His arms snaked around my waist turning my knees turned to jelly.

He pressed me against a nearby tree and I had a moment to remember the last time I found myself in this position.  Thinking about Sebastian wasn’t helping.  I was starting to feel like a harlot.  With that thought I stood straight own my own.  My back dug against the bark of the tree.  He didn’t give me any breathing room.  He continued to temp me by his nearness.  I fought against my demon.

He didn’t use his hands and I was grateful.  I would like to think those advances would snap me into my true self but I wasn’t sure.  “I can’t Flynn. I can’t fight it anymore,” I said leaning into his chest.

His head rested on top of my head a moment while he spoke.  “This is when it counts the most,” he said.

He leaned down again and I lost control.  All my anger was released in  the succubus’s desires.  My hands flew into his hair and tugged.  I pulled his face to mine.  My mouth was pressed to his fighting to getting inside.  He reached to pull my hands away even though he let me in.  He tasted like toothpaste letting me know he hadn’t yet gotten breakfast before following me in the woods.

“Cozy,” a voice from behind us said.

Flynn whorled, dropping my hands.  I still hadn’t gotten control.  “I thought he was your brother,” Sebastian said.

Flynn face was a mask of rage.  When I heard it speak from my mouth for the first time I was stunned.  “You,” the succubus crooned.

My voice sounded more like a purr.  I was outraged.  It had never spoken through me before.  I didn’t know it had a voice.  Boy had I been wrong.

Sebastian looked pleased.  “Kayla,” Sebastian murmured back.

His voice called to my beast and I moved forward.  Thankfully Flynn held me back.  His arms crossed my chest holding me protectively.

“Why are you here?” Flynn asked.  He was drawing a figurative line in the sand.

“I think Kayla wants me here,” Sebastian answered smiling in my direction.

“Mercy isn’t herself,” Flynn said in a way that would suggest if he hadn’t still been holding me back he would have face off with him.

For me it was like looking through a port hole because I had no control of my body or my speech.  The succubus need was powerful.  At the moment it’s sight was set on Sebastian, but it also wanted Flynn.  It would take whoever gave into it first.

Sebastian made a cocky move to reach for me.  I would never understand that move.   He couldn’t have been so stupid.  I guess he underestimated his opponent.  Flynn stepping away and to the side of me in a swift movement raised his fist and swung.  He would have connected.  Instead his fist sailed into thin air.  Flynn stood looking about moved back to me.  He turned in time to see Sebastian standing behind us.

“What are you?” Flynn asked sternly with folded hands but somehow still blocking my path to Sebastian.  We hadn’t spoken last night when he rescued me from my floor.  Now I wished I would have mentioned that bit of information to him.  I wasn’t total sure we were in true danger.  But if something happened to Flynn, I would hate myself forever.

“What I am is not a cambion like the two of you?”

What was a cambion, I thought to myself.

Flynn said, “So you are full demon?”  Ah, apparently Flynn was familiar with the term.

Sebastian nodded, “Glad to see you have brains too.”

“I don’t really care what you are but stay away from my sister.”

The succubus curled my arm around Flynn the apparent victor in this battle.  The twit had no scruples.

“I eat cambions like you for snack,”

“Demon eater, are you?  Is that why you’re interested in Mercy?  Is she easy prey for you?” Flynn said spitting out the words.

Sebastian laughed while they circled each other.  I was now forgotten in a primitive sense even though I remained firmly in Flynn’s arms. “Did she tell you how she got home last night while you went to ride those to fillies?” Sebastian said giving his back impression of Texas drawl.  I couldn’t say why he used that accent.  We weren’t from Texas.  I let that go because I hoped the succubus would let me take control back with this impending treat.

Flynn tuned to look at me with questioning eyes.  But I had no voice in this form.  I couldn’t answer.  The succubus watched with hungry ideas.  “I walked her home and even popped her in her bedroom.  If I wanted dinner, she’d be dead,” Sebastian baited.

Flynn was good.  He didn’t reveal his feelings about that bit of news. “So what do you want then demon?”  I wanted to know as well.

“Isn’t it obvious? Like you I’m interested in her,” he said straight faced.  “I wonder what your friend would do right now knowing you were pursuing her.”

Flynn eyes stayed steady as Sebastian grinned baiting him. “My friend has nothing to worry about when it comes to me. You on the other hand don’t stand a chance.  Mercy isn’t interested in you.”

Normally I would be mad at such a comment.  I mean I don’t let people speak for me.  But this time I was grateful because I couldn’t have said it better myself.

Flynn moved lighting fast but Sebastian was quicker. Flynn seemed to anticipate and pivoted lifting his foot as Sebastian materialized just where Flynn moved.  His hand made a sickening crunch when it landed on Sebastian’s nose.  Sebastian was down.  Flynn stood over him still holding me.  I was impressed.  He had skill.

Sebastian looked surprised for a second holding his nose.  He didn’t however look hurt.  “Her eyes say otherwise friend.  Isn’t it interesting though how she reveals herself?  Have you asked yourself why her eyes go black like that? We both know that’s not a trait of a succubus or an incubus.  So what is she really,” Sebastian said in a diatribe of words.  Flynn had to let me go to look me in the face.  When he did, Sebastian dissipated and didn’t return.

Flynn took two steps back.  His face changed in disbelief.  Then he turned to look back to see Sebastian was gone.  Looking back into my eyes again he walked back over to me.  Taking me into a fierce embrace he said, “Fight it Mercy.  I know you can.” He stoked my hair to sooth.

It didn’t take much too over throw the demon inside me.  All the information I needed to process from Sebastian’s words had the beast confused again.  Having command over my actions, I stayed in Flynn’s arms while he continued to speak.

His words were lost in my own muddled thoughts.  I wasn’t listening to him.  I was asking myself my own questions.  What the hell was Sebastian?  What was a demon eater?  Was it true?  Was he interested in me and why?  Was Flynn?  More important than any other, what the hell am I?

Chapter Twenty

candor (n.) honesty, frankness

One can never discount being held.  Flynn’s arms felt sure and true.  I needed the stability for that moment.  The boy that held me was a conundrum. He could be a total jackass, but then kind, a conceited jerk, yet a good friend.  I didn’t understand him.  But he was the only one who could remotely understand what I was going through.  Maggie, Luke and Paul were all human and even if they knew what I was, they could never empathize like Flynn could.

Akin to the light that dawned through parted clouds, I realized I was once again captain of my body.  Flynn pulled back and wiped a solitude tear from my face. Swiftly, he moved away.  I didn’t know what to make of it.  There in the depths of the cold blue eyes something began to smolder.

Feeling steadier, I was eager to continue my quest regardless of Sebastian’s previous presence.  “What’s the next step?” I asked.

He turned to look back at me. His eyes were flat again.  His hands fidgeted in fist.  It was as if he were nervous about something.  “I think because your mom kept this from you, there are two distinct parts of you. That’s not how it’s supposed to be.  My best guess is that you need to merge with your succubus side.”

I wasn’t quite sure how to accomplish that.  There was an entity that shared my body, but it wasn’t that simple.  Quite frankly I didn’t like the beast and had no real desire to permanently become one with it.  So I change the subject.  “What am I?” I asked referring to Sebastian’s innuendo that I was different somehow.

Looking me like I was the only person who existed on the earth he said, “You’re Mercy,” he said penetrating me with his eyes.  “But I think you need to master more control over your demon side before you merge with it.  I think at this point you could lose who you are if you try it now.” He said with long pauses in between.

“Is there something wrong with me?” I said.  With my eyes, I pleaded for him to fix me.  He stepped back over to me and laid his hands on my shoulders and lean in towards me. I felt the heat rise but I tried to remain in control.

“There is nothing wrong with you,” he said seriously.  Then with a mischievous grin he added, “I do want to know how you are going around kissing everyone if you haven’t mastered control.”

I stepped away averting my eyes.  I wasn’t kissing everyone and took offense to his comment.   “I not kissing everyone,” I protested.  “And well, your dad gave me this balm to use.”

His eyes lifted skyward for a second. “Figures, “he said. “He’s always trying to be the hero.”

“Your dad is a great guy,” I said in his defense, looking at Flynn’s back as he stepped further away from me.  Curtly, I wondered why he was moving so far away from me.

“Yeah, he’s great and I am the bad seed,” he said with regret.

I took steps towards him so I could comfort him as he’d done for me.  “You’re not bad, just,” I paused looking for the right words.  “I don’t know, was it really necessary to go do whatever it was with two girls?”

He looked away. “I do what I have to do to survive,” he said.

“For fun too,” I added.  I wanted to say more, but his look of pain stopped me.

“Why not?  I am what I am,” he said spreading his hands.

“What about Amanda?” I asked.  He was being honest and I had questions.

He looked directly at me. “I’d planned to break up with Amanda until the party debacle.  How do you break up with a girl after she had a fight with another girl over you?” he said arms raised as if praying to the heavens.

“Couldn’t you wait to move on until after you talked to her?”

“No, I have needs,” he said. “I can’t help it.  I didn’t suggest it either.”

“Why didn’t you just take what you needed from Amanda before we left?”

“You are so naive about everything,” he said in a huff and sat down as if defeated. “Look, I only take a little each time. I don’t want to hurt anyone any more than you do.  But over time that taking can have long term effects on a person.  If Amanda got sick for instance right now, it may take her longer to recover.”

“Oh,” I said surprised.  My eyes were wide with that nugget of information.

“Yeah, so it was time for me to move on.  But only taking a little means I have to take more often.  I won’t see these girls again for a while at least.  So I can take a bit more and hold out for a while.”

“Ok,” I said in understanding.  I swallowed words that couldn’t be said.  I felt like for the first time I really understood him and why he did what he did.

“And everyone thinks I don’t care. And maybe they’re right in a way.  I can’t care because I have to let them go.  So I only date girls I won’t care about,” he said.

I hadn’t expected him to say more.  But the truth of his words only added to what I understood of everything.  It hadn’t been a cake walk for him either.  He could be close to someone in ways I couldn’t, yet he had to keep his heart far away.  We were polar opposites.  I could let my heart get close but not my body.  I couldn’t help but appreciate his candor.

“I’m sorry,” I said.  I hoped he would hear the true regret in them.

“Sorry for what?” he asked and a hint of anger peered through.

“Sorry for assuming the worst,” I said.  His words had been sharp.  I needed to dampen them with empathy.  “I appreciate your candor.”

“Don’t get sappy Mercy.  I am what I am and a part of me is a jerk.”

I didn’t believe that for a minute anymore.  “I don’t think so,” I said.

But we didn’t say much more than that.  I move forward and he let me reach him. On my knees I put my hands on his back.  I leaned my head against his shoulder blade.  We were a pair of misfits.

This time I comforted him.  When he moved to stand, I moved back.   “We should go back,” he said and he was distant again.

Just when I thought we made strides as friends, I think I lost him to whatever mask he hid under.  He’d gotten up and began walking back down the mountain.  I stood and said, “About Luke, does he,” I couldn’t finish my sentence because my foot caught a rock and I went tumbling down the hill.  It wasn’t grace fall either unless you call a turkey trying to fly graceful.

The pain that shoot from my foot exploded and I reached for it once I came to a stop.  I heard Flynn call out my name just before he caught up to me.   “Are you ok,” he said dusting dirt and leaves from him face and hair.

Tears born of pain fell from my eyes as I said, “My ankle.”

He reached for it.  When he touched it, I cried out in hurt.  With light fingers he probed like he was a doctor. “I don’t think you broke it and it should heal regardless.”

“It hurts,” I said.

“Yes it will, but not being totally human means you’ll be fine.”

“What,” I said, bemused and not sure I understood his meaning through my searing pain.

“Mercy, you have a lot to learn.” He picked me up as if I weighted nothing again and began walking me down the side of the hill. “Your body will fix itself.  It’s one of the perks of not being human.  Once you fuel up, you’ll find out what other gifts you have.”

“Gifts,” I said one word was all I was able to get out through the pain.

“Every demon like incubus maybe similar but like people each has other qualities that separate themselves making them unique.”

He was right.  All this time I thought the only knowledge I needed to gain was how to kiss without killing when there was so much more.  He carried me all the back to the house and to my room where he laid me down.  David and my mom were gone.  It figures.  They hadn’t been around much.  My mom hadn’t even cared enough to look for me.  But maybe they were, but Flynn didn’t say.

“I should call you mother,” he said eyeing me for my disapproval.  When he didn’t get a reaction he added, “And tell her what happened.”

“No,” I said with finality.

He just looked at me a bit confused himself. “You’re more human and I am not sure how long it will take you to heal.”

“I’ll be fine,” I said quickly.  I didn’t want her to swoop in with mother kindness and brush away any anger I still repressed.  He said I’ll heal so there was really no need to bother her.

“Ok,” he said slowly.  He looked like he was trying to pacify me before I would explode.  “I’ll just tell them I found you,” he said rationally.

“Fine,” I said through gritted teeth.

“Wait here, I’ll get you some ice and Advil,” he said holding out a palm in the universal symbol for stop.

“Why do I need it?” I asked.  If I wasn’t human and would heal why bother with all the rest. I thought.

“Healing is painful and it will help,” he said and promptly left the room.  He didn’t give me a chance to argue.  He’d been gone a while for someone who was just getting Advil.  I was about to slide off the bed when the door opened.  Held in his hand was a tray loaded with a sandwich, soda, ice and Advil as promised.

I sighed.  My stomach growled at the sight of the food.  I hadn’t eaten anything except the few bites of bagel from the morning. “Thanks,” I said.

He nodded.  He looked away from my gaze.  I got the feeling he was hiding something.  I kept looking until he finally turned back to me and I saw it.  He didn’t want to acknowledge he cared. “I’ll be right back,” he said making a hasty retreat.

Several minutes later he came in and hooked me up with a television, cable and a remote.  I had to wonder why nobody cared to give me these items earlier.  Late at night, when I can’t sleep it would have been nice.  But I didn’t mention that.

“I have to head out.  I have a date,” he said.  Again he avoided my eyes.  His hand cupped his chin like he was deep in though.  I got the feeling again he didn’t want to leave me alone.

Grateful for all his help and just being there for me I tried not to show judgment.  But the shock from his abrupt statement made my betraying eyebrow raised.  Luckily, I kept control of my mouth and kept my comments to myself. “I have to see Chris first he wants to talk to me about the murders of those women,” he said answering my silent conversation ques.

“What murders?” I asked.  Honestly, I wasn’t really thinking at the moment about the serial killer stalking Maryland.

“You know the ones that have been on the news,” he said flatly.  I thought, remembering long ago about the one woman found dead but police weren’t able to determine cause of death.

“There have been more,” he said. “And well, those in the know might assume that an incubus did it.”

I looked up in alarm.

“Don’t worry.  He knows it wasn’t me but he has information.”

“Be careful.” I said as he left my room.  I was flipping the channels on the remote when sounds from my phone made me jump.  I snapped it up engaging the call with Maggie.

“Maggs,” I said hastily. “How’s Connecticut?”  My voice was a bit enthusiastic.  I’d missed her greatly.

“Great,” she said. “And how are things there?” she said mirroring my happiness.

“Good,” I said a bit tempered.  It wasn’t the truth but I couldn’t share those troubles with her anyway.

“Did you talk to Paul?” she asked.

Paul, crap I thought.  I hadn’t and he hadn’t returned any of my calls because I’d checked my phone shortly after Flynn left.  Through a barrage of words I shared the story about getting drunk and Flynn ending the one call I had gotten from Paul.

Maggie homed in on the other part of my tale that wasn’t about Paul.  I should have figured that.  “Eme, does Luke know about this Sebastian guy?” she asked hesitantly.

I felt more scrutiny than I felt support.  Was I being condemned?  What happened to friendship solidarity?  It wasn’t as though I had done anything wrong.  “Not specifically.  I haven’t done anything and don’t plan to.”

With a heavy sigh on her end I expected a lecture.  I almost felt like Maggie was my mother.  “What a mess?” she said.

I didn’t buy into her judgment.  I needed answers.  “What happened with Paul when you saw him?”

“He’s not doing so well, Eme.  I think he and Amber are done for good.”

Double crap, I thought.  I felt the crushing weight that this was somehow all my fault.  Maggie wasn’t doing such a good job of not making me feel that way.  “How do you know?”  I said nearly choking out the words.

I didn’t want to be responsible for their unhappiness.  “I talked to Amber and she’s says that Paul won’t talk to her either after breaking it off,” Maggie said.

A raw churn of jealousy burned my belly.  I knew it was wrong but it had been me and Maggie for a long time.  Now she and Amber talked.  That sounded so wrong.  Don’t get me wrong, Amber was sweet.  But I felt territorial.  Maggie was my friend.  I squashed the feeling and said, “Is she mad at me?”

“I don’t think so,” Maggie said on another deep sigh.  “She knows you and Luke are together so it couldn’t be your fault right?”  She said that last sentence like she wasn’t sure.

“I didn’t encourage this Maggs.” I said.  She said nothing which was more meaningful then words.  “You believe me, right?” I said hesitantly.

“Sure, Eme. I confused though. All of a sudden you’ve got a fan club.  It’s weird.”

So no one should like me.  Her words felt like a bitter pill.  A fissure between us had grown heedless to me.  It was now wide like the distance the ocean is between continents.

“Maggie,” I pleaded.

She jumped in and said, “Just don’t fuck this up with Luke. Stay away from Flynn and this Sebastian.”

Her words were strong.  Feeling as though she sucker punched me I said, “What does Flynn have to do with this?”

She sighed again as if this should be obvious to me. “Flynn has a way of making every girl do stupid things. And really, being so close to him you just might fall prey.”

Not thinking I jumped to his defensive. “Flynn is not a bad guy.”

I could hear her eyes rolling in her words.  “See this is what I’m talking about.”

“Really, he’s not that bad.” I couldn’t tell her what I knew that would vindicate him.

“Eme, Luke is a great guy.  You cannot mess with his best friend.”

What, who was this person.  I’ve know her all my life and she thinks I capable of that.  “Maggs, you know me better than that,” I pleaded.

“Thing are just so messed up with Paul and Flynn broke up with Amanda over the phone today.”

Oh my gosh, he hadn’t told me about that, but how did Maggie know.  “I didn’t know that.  How did you hear about the break up?”

“Amanda called me crying a little while ago,” she said exasperatedly.  The rest of her words I didn’t hear.  Since when did Maggie and Amanda call and talk to each other.   Specifically when were they close enough to talk about break ups?

I did something I hadn’t done to Maggie except when it came to the supernatural.  I lied to get off the phone.  I wasn’t sure I could continue talking to her without sounding childish.  I needed to regroup and reassess.  I felt like I was losing my best friend.  Who would I have left after all of this?  It seems as though my one kiss to Luke that fateful day had far reaching consequences.  I dropped my phone on the bed wondering why everything had changed.

I lay on the bed a long time flipping channels not really paying any attention to what was on the screen.  My life was in trouble.  I needed to sit back and decide what was really important to me.  This inner beast who knew me was leaving me with no one I’d cared so deeply about.  Maybe I should leave Luke and be with Paul.   Paul was my best friend.  If he wanted me too shouldn’t I?  Isn’t that what best friends were for.

Indubitably, I was dreaming when I looked up to the side of my bed.  Things couldn’t have gotten any worst when Sebastian popped in next to me on my bed.

Chapter Twenty One

incredulity (n.) the state of being unwilling or unable to believe something.

As amazing as Sebastian’s features were, his piercing blue eyes were vacant.  Now knowing he was full demon helped to understand the lack of humanity in them.  But it didn’t make it any less creepy, maybe even a little more.  Yet somehow his face showed signs of concern that contradicted his eyes.

“What happened?” he asked in an unfamiliar accent.

“I fell,” I answered confused by the change in his voice.

Moving forward, he removed the ice from my foot and probed it with his fingers.  Despite Flynn’s claims that I would heal inhumanly fast, I still had pain.  I guess it took longer in cambions like me.  My existence leaning more towards human couldn’t help the speedy healing process either.  When I winced in soreness at his touch, he moved his hands like he felt something hot.

“When did this happen?” he asked.  His eye were deadly serious like he would waited for me to give him answers that would lead to a potential victim.

“Earlier today,” I said.  He shot me a look of incredulity.

His tone took on a tone of accusation. “Why haven’t you healed?” he said sharply.

I looked at him not sure why I was entertaining this conversation in my room.  It wasn’t as if I invited him.  So my tone mirrored his when I finally answered. “I guess that because I am too human.  So have you come to suck the demon out of me?” I retorted.

His face softened as he moved down towards the bed before putting the ice packet back on my foot.  “You can have it,” I answered my own question defeatedly.

He looked at me in alarm. “You don’t mean that as that.  It would result in your death.”

I turned my head.  Things were quite bad in my life right now ,but I wasn’t yet seeking death. When he placed a warm hand on my cheek so tenderly, I turned to look back at him.  His eyes still held no light.  How could his touch be so tender and his expression be so empty?

My expression was clearly plastered all over my face.  “Why are you sad?” he said.

I deflected amazing I might add.  “Why are you talking in an accent?” I quickly countered keeping my eyes steadfast on his.

“What accent?” he asked back shifting to his more familiar American accent.

He was a perfect liar.  He’d spoken with a prefect straight face.  It didn’t matter though.  I didn’t think I could trust him anyway.  So why was I allowing him to remain here in my room.  I should just tell him to go, but I couldn’t. “You’re incredulous.  Can’t you just be honest?” I asked almost pleading with him.

I shouldn’t care, I know.  But there was just something about the boy that stood before me that I couldn’t ignore.  I felt the demon in me stir.  She didn’t have to speak through me for me to understand she had great attraction for the him.  But she wasn’t in control.  I was.  If I was honest with myself, my curiosity was peaked.  “About what?” he asked a little innocently.

I shook my head. Neither of us had answered the other’s questions yet.  Therefore it was only nature that I continue our banter.  “Why are you here?”

“To see you,” he answered.  I was thrown off guard.  Where was his question?  I felt disarmed that he actually answered.

I didn’t let that stop me though from pushing forward.  “If you want to be my friend, then you have to be honest with me,” I said.

He peered in my eyes.  I guessed he was trying to discern if I was serious.  His gaze was intense.  I nearly flinched under the crushing weight of it.  “Fine, but who said I wanted to be your friend,” he said with the accent back.

“Because you know I have a boyfriend.  Plus I have a lot of issues right now,” I said.  Then I couldn’t help myself with a tiny grin.  His face had changed to a grimace when I’d spoken.  It was kind of cute.  So I said the only thing I could.  “Anyway, I like the accent. Irish?” I asked.

He looked back not amused.  I held a breath when he spoke.  “No, Scottish,” he said this time in a thick brogue.

His smoldering dark Celtic looks paired with his thick black hair suited someone of Scottish decent.  He didn’t comment on my boyfriend or issues comment.

“Tell me Kayla, if you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go,” he said.  The words just flowed off his tongue in his native lilt.

I laid my head back on the pillow mesmerized with his voice. Suddenly, comfortable with a boy in my room, I let his voice take me in my mind to strange and exotic places.  I would have been easy for me to say Scotland or Ireland just listening to him speak.  But there had been places I’d dreamed about over the years.  Places I had always planned I would go in my future.

“Well, there are a few places not just one,” I said while picturing them in my head.

“Where?” he asked genuinely interested.  His face lit up almost like an eager child.  He almost looked human if not for his eyes.

On a satisfying breath I said, “Oh, like the pyramids of Egypt, Paris, and London just to name of few.”

“Are you dressed Kayla?” he asked.

That was such a strange question.  I should have pondered it.  But I lifted the cover to see that I hadn’t changed since morning. “Yes.”

“Can you sit up?” he asked. Again that should have been a hint, but it wasn’t.

I was puzzled by his questions but said, “Yes,” unsure where this line of questions was headed.

He scooped me up until I was standing awkwardly in his arms putting most of my weight on my good foot.  Being so close I noticed his scent.  He smelled of warm rich spices that made my mouth want to drool.  All manner of thought escape me when I felt like a cork being sucked through the opening of a bottle.  When my ears popped I opened my eyes unable to process what I was seeing and feeling.  Fine grains of something flew over my skin and hair while a dazzling sunset slipped behind the gargantuan geometric shape.

I shook my head in disbelief.  It couldn’t be.  The warmth of the fading sun drifted over my skin.  My feet sunk into sand when I shifted a bit in his arms.  I blinked my eyes rapidly so my brain could try to except my reality.  The temperature in the air changed as rapidly as the sunset.  I turned to meet those perfect but vacant blue eyes questioning without speaking what I was seeing.

“Yes, we’re in Egypt, lass” he said with a grin showing how pleased he was with himself.

If ever I was tongue-tied in my life it was now.  How do you react when you cross oceans to another continent not in dreams but reality in the space of a minute?  I was standing in Egypt looking at one of the Seven Wonders of the World at sunset.  It had been night in the States, for the sun to be setting here in the desert.  We had to have crossed time as well.  Had he taken me forward or back I didn’t know for sure.

“Amazing isn’t it?” he asked.

That was an absurd question but one that didn’t compare to my reality.  No matter how amazing the sights of the pyramids and sphinx were, it wasn’t appropriate for me to be here.  Heck, I didn’t even have a passport.  Don’t get me wrong I could appreciate the sights, but it was truly wrong to be in another county with a boy I hardly knew.  One who could be potentially very dangerous.

“We should go,” I said flatly.

He face lost a bit of shine for a second. “But there is more,” he said enthusiastically.  I didn’t get a chance to protest.

The warm heat of the fading sun was interchanged with cool darkness and misty rain in the air.  My eyes opened when I shivered.  Sebastian held me close while he walked and I hobbled to the edge.  My foot wasn’t a concern at the moment.  The vision of a beautiful city full of lights in the nights sky took my breath from my lips before I could speak.  I looked out over a vast city with a few cars driving by below.  It didn’t take much with my feet rapping against metal to know I was standing on the top viewing level of the Eifel Tower. I was in Paris. Breathing, I thought again.  I was in Paris as if thinking it again would wake my brain.  Overcome with the change of scenery I found myself looking about and taking in every inch of the view.  I was in Paris.  Apparently my brain was set on a constant loop.  My voice wasn’t as strong when I spoke again.

“Take me home, Sebastian.”

Undoubtedly, I hadn’t made myself clear.  “Not yet,” he said.

Again I felt sucked down a vortex.  The pop in my ears was my queue and I opened my eyes.  I knew where I was instantly.  Big Ben, the iconic clock tower and the London Eye, an enormous Ferris wheel, sat in the distance of my view.  But where was I.  I started to move forward but Sebastian’s arms around my waist wouldn’t let me move.

“Don’t look down,” he said in my ear with his close proximity.  I wasn’t ever sure why anyone uttered those words.  Those words clearly spoken aloud meant for the hearer to look.  So, I looked.  Instantly I had vertigo.  If I had it right we were standing atop London Bridge.  How fitting.

“Please take me home,” I said shakily.  It wasn’t that I hadn’t been floored by instantly transported to places I wouldn’t get to go anytime soon, but this wasn’t the way I envisioned my visits.

He didn’t speak.  But when I felt the suction in my ears I knew we were on our way again. When the darkness faded against the starry moon lit sky, I turned to see the lake house.  I realized the dock we were sitting on was Flynn’s.  His arms were on me while our legs dangled over the edge of the mini pier.  He wasn’t pleased.

“I thought you wanted to see those places,” he said darkly.

That was an understatement.  I had wanted to visit those places.  How I’d seen them with Sebastian was still like looking at a picture but from an upfront view.  I wanted to stroll around and take in all the sights in the daylight and at night.  But I wouldn’t tell him that.  I feared he would take me back for an extended visit.

“I did and thank you,” I said trying to remain calm.  I turned to look back at the house to see it lit up like a Christmas tree.  I wasn’t sure where my mom or David was in the house or if they were even home.  I couldn’t see the driveway from here. “It’s just that I couldn’t leave without letting someone know where I was going.”

His arms were around me.  Strangely, his body heat was keeping me warm.  He was a demon and I wasn’t sure what to expect.  Was he human?  Well maybe not, but was he like human.

“Sorry, I just wanted to do something for you,” he said sheepishly.

He seemed so sincere. So I opened my mouth and just said it heading off any future conversation of this particular topic. “Can we just be friends?” I asked.

He turned slightly. We were already close and said, “For now.”

I needed calm in my life and wasn’t going to debate his response. Now is all I could ask for.  Everything else was so complicated, what I needed was a friend.

He moved his free left arm to point to the sky and like a magician his fingers drew lines in the sky to connect the dots of stars.  No joke that when his fingers moved a trail of light was left in its wake.  He rattled off names of constellations as I watched like a kid at a magic show.  I couldn’t help but be dazzled by the striking guy that sat next to me.  His magic let me remember he wasn’t an average boy.  He was a demon, one that could steel my life in a matter of moments.  But somehow he managed to spell cast me with his magic light show.  Watching the stars in that light was fascinating.  He talked about each star like he knew them as friends.  When I found myself leaning  on him after a while I sat up straight.

“Can you take me back to my room?” I asked a little too breathlessly.  I thought about Luke.  What had I been thinking?  I could have walked to the house at that moment but I didn’t want to explain myself to my mom.  I didn’t want to have to explain just how I’d gotten out of the house in the first place.  I also had to wonder just how much time had passed.

“Sure,” he said.  This time I was prepared.  The pressure in my ears wasn’t as great as the last few times.  Was it because he hadn’t taken me that far?

When he popped me in my room Flynn was sitting on my bed waiting.  He looked at me then at Sebastian.  He stood without speaking and walked out without a word.  I felt guilty under the stare he’d given me. I hadn’t done anything or had I.  Being honest meant that I had to admit I’d actually enjoyed spending time with Sebastian.  Somehow it didn’t seem to matter.  No matter what I did, I hurt someone.  I wondered if he headed to call Luke and rat me out.  Would have to explain myself again?  Frankly, I wouldn’t expect my explanation to seem true to Luke’s ears as everything I did could be misinterpreted.

I looked at Sebastian.  He must have read the hurt on my face.  He sighed. “I guess I should leave.”

I nodded and like that he was gone.

Chapter Twenty Two

subterfuge (n.) deceit used in order to achieve one's goal.

I sat around the house for the next day and a half.  I barely saw my mother or Flynn.  Each seemed to be avoiding me like the plague.  It was David who had stopped by to make sure I was ok.  Flynn had passed along to our individual parents that I’d hurt my foot which by the way was healing at human pace.  I began to wonder if the whole succubus thing was a dream.

Talking to Flynn would have been a good idea.  I needed to know what he may have told Luke.  But Flynn made sure he wasn’t around any of that time.  I’d eventually have to talk to Luke.  And I did.  The conversation was short on my part with excuses of being tired.  But what little we did speak it seemed as though Flynn hadn’t told him anything negative.  I was being a coward.  So was Sebastian because I hadn’t heard a peep from him either.

Refusing to feel guilty about the situation was my motto.  I hadn’t done anything wrong.  Even though I didn’t tell Luke about Sebastian I wasn’t going to feel bad about that.  I had no feelings for Sebastian at least I hoped not.  His absence was more than a small blessing.  And he hadn’t crossed the line when we had been together so what was there to tell.  Luke doesn’t reiterate every conversation he has with friends and neither should I.   Was I trying to convince myself, maybe?   Although Sebastian taking me all over the world the other night might be information I should share, I didn’t.  Not yet at least.

I hadn’t talked to Maggie either. I was used to this treatment whenever she had a boyfriend.  You might say she had OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) when it came to boyfriends.   But what I’d really been troubled about was that she seemed to be developing friendships with Amanda and Amber.  I shouldn’t be jealous, but I was.  Maggie and I were forever friends.  I didn’t know what I’d do without her.  Yet I didn’t call her either.  By Wednesday, I was more than bored.

The day was crawling.  By mid afternoon the silent house was more than I could bare.  I had to get up and explore.  Yesterday, I’d been hobbling around. Today, I walked with a barely noticeable limp.  But still I’d basically been held up in my room.  As I was walking down the hall I heard a slight noise coming from Flynn’s room.  He hadn’t been home this morning when I’d gotten up for breakfast.  It had been David who told me that there was food before he and my mom left.  He’d also told me to hang in there, that my mom and I would get past this little spat.

Now with a nerves knot in my belly, I knocked on Flynn’s door.  I heard a soft ‘Come in’ that proceeded my opening the door.  Flynn sat in a chair in front of his television holding a game controller.  He hadn’t looked up to see me either.  His focus was on the game.  I looked over him thinking just how lovely he was sun kissed and bare chest with only shorts on.  He looked like he was headed to the beach.  His hair was just so in that spiked slight Mohawk look that only he’d perfected.  I found myself biting my lip when the succubus stirred inside me.

I’d rolled my lips to privately lick them before I released them on a slight exhale of breath.  I closed my eyes then opened them.  He must have paused the game because he was staring at me curiously.

“Kayla,” he said stringing out the name with an indescribable look on his face.  That name snapped me out of whatever I’d been thinking.

“Don’t call me that,” I retorted like a kid who just been teased.  I wasn’t sure why I said it because I did prefer my middle name.  But he’d said it in an accusatory tone.

“Only that Rat can call you that,” he said hissing back at me.  This isn’t the way I hoped the conversation would go.

“His name is Sebastian,” I said coldly.

“I’ll remember that the next time I talk to Luke,” he said then looked away. So maybe he hadn’t talk to Luke yet about Sebastian.

“There is nothing to tell.  We’re just friends,” I said.

“Whatever,” he said.  He turned back to his game.  I felt slighted.  I almost back out of his room when he turned his winter blue eyes on me and asked, “What do you want?”

I wasn’t sure anymore.  Originally I’d really wanted company to hang out.   But now it was clear now he didn’t want to hang out with me.

“Never mind,” I said quietly backing down from our stand off.  I started to back out of the room not sure where I was going but he stopped me.

“Wait,” he said.  The tenor of his voice had changed.  In that one word he sounded almost sorry.  I turned back still holding his doorknob ready to bolt if there was any sign we were going to argue more. “Everyone is hanging out tonight, you want to come,” he said looking at me expectantly.

I was taken aback by his quick change of tone and offer.  But tonight meant, I would be still idle for several more hours.  I found myself saying, “Sure.”   With it all decided and nothing more to say, I walked out closing the door behind me.  My eyes were still wide with astonishment.  His cold and warm response had moved way too fast for me.  I had to wonder if he was an accomplished liar.  No one should be able to shift moods that quick unless you were bipolar.  Was he bipolar?

I didn’t go back to my room.  In fact I went down to the docks and sat looking at the wildlife and thought for a long while.  I should call Luke, I thought.  But I didn’t.  I even passed on calling Maggie.

Later, I even sat alone in the hot tub for a while not wanting to go back to my room.  I couldn’t avoid it forever.  This vacation was starting to go downhill.

Eventually, I did go to my room only to get ready for tonight.  I didn’t put any extra effort into my look.  Ok that’s not true.  I didn’t want to look like I dressed in the dark if I ran into Flynn’s fan club.  But I wasn’t necessarily trying to get any more attention from anyone.

Feeling pretty seemed to bright my mood.  Things were going so badly with Paul and eventually Luke would find out about Sebastian.  I know I was avoiding a possible fight, but heck I just couldn’t deal with that far away from him.  I thought I would have a better chance of explaining in person.

When I stepped out of my room, I found Flynn in the hall. I watched how he looked at me and I was certain I passed his scrutiny.  Competing with supernatural girls and the Barbie twins had me taking more care in how I looked.  Maggie was always in my ear about flaunting your best assets.  When Flynn appraised me silently then held a hand out to me, I took it not thinking any further.

Walking again to the camp grounds reminded me that we hadn’t walked since the first time.  No longer holding my hand, Flynn moved with purpose keeping a few steps ahead of me.  In fact Flynn hadn’t really held my hand that long.  The gesture had only been to get me to move forward.  I found myself nearly jogging to keep up with him.  But I held back not wanting to sweat in the cool night air.  It wasn’t yet dark so I was able to see Flynn clearly when abruptly he stopped and turned to face me.

“I should tell you something,” he said cryptically.  “We are meeting Chris” he said.

“Oh.” I didn’t know how to respond.

“The other night when we met he told me some disturbing news about the deaths that are occurring here in Maryland.”

His face was drawn and I didn’t know what to make of it.  I hadn’t really thought about those women since he had mentioned it the other day.  I didn’t make a habit of watching the news, so I’d been oblivious to all that was going on.

“Have there been any more deaths?” I asked somehow nervous about the answer I may get.  Although the question I really wanted to ask was, why did you wait until now to tell me this?

“No, but a woman went missing yesterday,” he said apprehensively.  His face looked grim.  I wanted to reach out and touch his face with sympathy for the angst on it, but I held back.

“Is she from around here?” I asked not sure why I already knew the answer.

“Yes,” he said solemnly. All of sudden things started to make sense.

“They think our kind had something to do with it.  They think we are using subterfuge to cover our culpability,” I said.  All the deaths were happening in close proximity to where we were.  A chill ran through me.

“No,” he said hastily.  Then he amended and said, “I’m not sure but certainly it doesn’t look good.”

I looked directly in his eye capturing his attention. “What do you think?”  I know he must have thought about this.  He wasn’t a dumb guy.  He’d shown his capacity to command SAT vocabulary of late.  Points for him.

“I think we are going to have to figure this out,” he said soberly.  There was wariness in his eyes that frightened me more.

When we made it to the camp, the fading light haloed the building.  Chris and his group stood in front of the doors in their familiar triangle pattern.  Everyone but Chris looked confrontational with arms folded and eyes suspiciously on Flynn and me.

Before anyone of us could say anything a tall girl clad in a taupe leather vest and animal print painted on pants with golden tones of blond hair hastily pulled back in a braid materialized in front of us.  She was a vision to behold, appearing out of thin air.

“Where is he?” she demanded.

I’m sure my eyes were wide because she focused on me. Her golden eyes burned in to me like fire.  I had a moment of choice to fight or flee.  “Who?” I asked boldly surprising myself.

Her eyes narrowed into slits when she spoke mimicking the shifters with her stance. She gave no notice to my tone with her hands folded across her chest. “The rat fink who cheated on me with my sister,” she said coolly.

“Bernadette,” a voice said behind me.

I whirled around as did Flynn who’d been standing beside me.  Sebastian was poised directly behind me.  He was gorgeous dressed in a charcoal shirt and dark wash jeans.  He stole my breath way just with the sight of him.  My heart rate leaped more than it had when the mysterious girl appeared in our path.

I turned back around when the girl Bernadette began to speak again.  Her arms where no longer folded in front of her.  Instead they were extended in front of her.  “Rat,” she said sternly.  Her eyes were on fire.  “How could you kill my sister?”

Lighting fast, her hands were a glow in fiery orange orbs.  Revving up, like a pitcher at a baseball game, I noticed Flynn move for the first time.  He began with timid steps forward.  Even though things moved quickly now, I caught every detail that happened.  I felt arms come around my waist and the darkness begin to invaded my eyes.  I knew what was about happen.  Before the obscurity overtook my vision, Bernadette’s attention was on Flynn.  I had a moment to see her blasted him back with a fiery ball before I’d been transported elsewhere.  I had no way of knowing if he was ok.

I didn’t even let Sebastian speak, “What the hell? Take me back!” I yelled.  With the trees still surrounding us, I knew we were still in the woods but that wasn’t my concern.

“I just wanted to make sure you’re safe,” he said calmly holding out his hands in a gesture of peace from my wrath.

“Flynn could be hurt,” I exclaimed.

He nodded and a moment later he was gone.  I hoped he was going to get Flynn because if he wasn’t he wouldn’t have to worry about Bernadette.  He would have to worry about me.  With life and death an issue, I’d found who I was.  I was a fighter not a flighter.

If the events of the evening weren’t scary I might have laughed when Flynn and Sebastian reappeared in an embrace.  They looked at each other for a second before separating rapidly.  I securitized Flynn.  He appeared to be ok so, I had to assume he was.

“What the,” Flynn began to say when a voice boomed out from not far away.

“I know you there Rat.  You can’t hide from me.”  I recognized that voice even though I’d only heard it once.  Bernadette had found us just that quick.  I saw the glowing balls of fire in the distance.  Sebastian came to me at that moment.

“I don’t want to leave you, but I think if I do I will draw her away.  I’m sorry for this. I’ll be back to check on you as soon as I can,” he said in a whisper before disappearing from my existence.

His assumption was wrong. “So you’re the girl he’s with now,” Bernadette said from about thirty feet away looking at me.

Yes, he’d most assuredly been wrong.  She hadn’t left.  Crap.  So, I answered her with an emphatic, “No.”

She hadn’t waited for my answer and it was too late for me to react.  I stared like a deer in headlights.  A glowing ball of heat was already headed my way.  Flynn saw it before me and his reflexes had been better than mine.  I was on the ground with him on top of me when the orbs soared by.  The burning ball of flame narrowly missed him with the slight exception of a burn on his right arm.  The orbs blasted bark off a tree they hit that had been behind us.

Bernadette was closing in on us now.  This time it would be impossible for her aim to miss.  Bleakly, I thought it would be a great time for Sebastian to make a reappearance.  A bright light like car lights shined through the trees casting a white glow onto her.  For whatever reason her face grew paled, then she dissipated.

I shifted under Flynn’s weight turning to see what made the illumination, but it was gone.  Besides being in the woods, I wasn’t even sure where we were.  There must have been a road nearby and the beam of car lights somehow frightened her away.  I wasn’t sure why car lights would frighten her but I wasn’t going to knock the gift horse that saved us.  What I hadn’t expected was the figure to appear through the trees.

“If you weren’t my best friend, I would have to question why you are laying on top of my girlfriend in the middle of the woods,” Luke said.

Flynn turned around then lifted himself up with his forearms getting to his feet.  “Luke, you made it,” he said.  Luke clasped Flynn’s arm helping him up.  There was something I caught in his eyes before he turned away.  Before I could think about it, Luke was at my side.

Luke asked, “Are you ok?”

Looking into the pools of his warm blue eyes I said, “Yes.” And frankly I was a whole lot better with him here.

“What happened?” Luke asked looking at me then Flynn.  He helped me to my feet when he noticed me wincing with pain.  I gave a little hop and placed more of my weight on my uninjured foot.  Apparently, Flynn’s tackle had reinjured my ankle.  Kneeling down at my feet he placed his hand on my hurt ankle and it was warm despite the chilly air.

“It’s not broken.  Can you walk on it?” he asked.

I leaned back on my foot and it didn’t hurt as much as I thought it would.   I nodded.  Leaning into the comforts of his arms, I gave into his open embrace.  We started by walking through the woods holding hands, unable to not touch each other.

Stepping on a fallen branch that snapped under my weight brought me back to reality.  I became conscious that Flynn and Luke had been talking.  My mind was reeling with recent events.  I hadn’t been paying attention.

The next thing I heard was “Bernadette was smoking hot,” Flynn was saying with wide gestures as if Luke didn’t get the point.  I on the other hand didn’t understand how Flynn could even think about what she looked like after she tried to kill us.  If a cute boy tried to kill me, you could bet nowhere in my story would his attractiveness ever enter.  What he looked like would be lost on the simple fact that he wanted to end my life. But indubitably, that same principle didn’t hold true for guys or maybe just Flynn.  At least Luke didn’t say something like ‘Really’ because then I’d have to take away cool points from him.

“So this Sebastian guy is into Mercy.  And he calls her Kayla,” Flynn said mockingly.  I rolled my eyes wishing I could go back to the blank space I’d occupied moments before and not here this part of the conversation.  The best I could do was walk ahead when Sebastian’s name came up.

Luke finally chimed in and asked, “Why would he call her that?”  I assume he didn’t ask me because I was ahead of them.  I turned and decided to answer because I didn’t like the direction this conversation was going.

“My middle name is McKayla.  And for whatever reason he started calling me Kayla.  I didn’t care because I doubted I ever see him again after we left this place.  He and I are only friends and he knows I have a boyfriend,” I said in a pool of words that filled the night air.  I turned back while Luke and Flynn stood looking stunned at my sudden outburst.  I didn’t stay to watch.  Instead I stalked off.

In the distance, I heard them resume talking again but I no longer listened.  There was a lot on my mind.  I wondered when Sebastian would make an appearance and I hoped it would be soon rather than later in my room.  If he popped in there, it would be monumentally disastrous.  In addition to that I wasn’t sure I was up to dealing with Sebastian’s subterfuge.  There was a lot more to this guy and I was certain that I shouldn’t trust him.

One thing I did note was that Luke wasn’t in shock when Flynn explained the fire wheeling she-demon.  So, I concluded that Luke was in on all the secrets and most likely even mine.  I didn’t get a chance to ponder that last thought because we broke through the trees and on the gravel drive of the lake house.

Following the worn path Flynn had put us on, we’d made it to the house.  Luke came up beside me and placed his arm around my waist.  Maybe I could have protested but it felt nice to have his arms around me.  It also let me know that he wasn’t that mad at me after finding out about Sebastian.

When we made it up to the house, my mom and David sat on the front deck in each other’s arms.  It was the first time I’d seen their affection for each other outside of the proposal.   They looked down from the stars to see us.  Luke’s arm was still around me.

Maybe I should have shrugged out his Luke’s embrace, but instead I decided to shove this bit of my boyfriend’s affection into my mom’s face.  A bit petty maybe, but I needed to make a point.  “Mom,” I said. “Have you met Luke?”

She didn’t answer me out loud, but nodded.  Luke said to me, “I came here first before finding you guys on the trail.” We’d passed his BMW parked next to the Range Rover on are way up here.

“Well, that good.  But I should also inform you he’s my boyfriend,” I said to her before catching the shocked look on both her and David’s face.  Flynn shifted uneasily side to side looking at his father.  Luke dropped his hands from my waist and stood a little taller.  I ignored this all and proceeded to walk through the front door heading in the direction of my room.  Luke followed me while I processed the look on my mom’s face.  It had been fear not anger.  But actually there’d been fear there prior to me dropping the bomb.  What had she been afraid of?

Chapter Twenty Three

delineate (v.) to describe, outline, shed light on

I walked in my room solemnly.  I’d only left it less than an hour ago.  Then, I’d been primped for a party and feeling better about myself, yet now somehow I felt worse.  I shouldn’t have treated my mother like that.  I know she loved me and must have her reasons from keeping truths from me.  Even still, I believed I had a right to be mad, but maybe it was the fear in her eyes that woke me up to my reality.

When the door clicked close behind me, I turned in a near pirouette.  Luke stood facing me after he clicked the lights on.  He looked like pure sunshine in the mustard yellow long sleeve top with jeans.  His halo of golden curls lay attractively messy around his face.  His expression was blank but mine was full of need.  I moved quickly to him wrapping myself in his arms.  He held me for a long while smoothing my hair and letting the emotions escape me.

Glancing up at him for the first time, I saw the raw emotion in his face when he leaned down to kiss me.  The fog cleared my brain before his lips met mine.  I had no protection for him so I turned away disengaging myself from his embrace.

I slumped to the floor leaning my back against the bed.  Luke misreading my emotions came and sat next to me. “Is there something more between you and this Sebastian?” he asked facing me.

I moved my head from my knees to face him. “What? No!” I exclaimed.

“Then why’d you turn from my kiss?” he asked.

That was the million dollar question and it was time for me to answer.  I’d never gotten Flynn’s response to the question if Luke knew about me or not but I had a feeling based on his reactions to everything tonight he knew.

“You know why?” I said keeping my eyes on his, not backing down.

“I don’t,” he replied.

I sighed. I didn’t really want to delineate my story. “I know you know what Flynn is, so therefore you must know about me.”

He turned away giving his own sigh. “I guessed.”

It surprised me he hadn’t confessed that Flynn had told him. “How long have you known?”

“When his dad and your mom got together it fit with the fact you didn’t want to kiss me, but when you did I wasn’t sure anymore.”

Ah, the kiss that had turned my world upside down.  If only I could take the cursed thing back.  I put my hands over my face in disgust of the memory.

“I was able to kiss you because of the balm,” I said recanting the story about David’s gift to me.

“Well, that answers that question,” he said.

But I wasn’t quite finished with the story.  I went on to tell him about Paul and how he was the catalyst to my finding out what I was.  Then I told him the full truth about the most recent kiss between Paul.

“I wish you would have told me,” he said.

I wished I had too. “I was under orders from my mother not to delineate our little family secret to anyone not even Maggie,” I said in disgust.

“She doesn’t know?” he asked.

I shook my head.  “So I don’t have the balm on right now.  That’s why I turned from your kiss.”

His hand came to my cheek spreading tingling sensations throughout my face.  He pulled me closer than we already were a mere whisper away.  “There’s something I should tell you,” he said quietly.

Flynn decided to enter my room at that second without even a knock.  He looked down on us and rolled his eyes. “Mercy, you have company downstairs.”

I should have wondered who could possibly be waiting for me but there was something more important.  “I’ll be down in a minute,” I said absently. “Luke’s about to tell me something.”

Flynn gave Luke a funny look I couldn’t interpret before turning back to me. “It’s Sebastian.”

Shit, I thought. I looked at Luke before getting to my feet. “I’m sorry.  I’ll be right back.” I caught Flynn’s disapproving gaze as I passed him on the way out my door.  When I got to the stairs I could hear he and Luke in a discussion about something.  I couldn’t hear their words, so I changed my focus to the boy downstairs.  I should have been grateful he hadn’t popped in my room.  That had been a small blessing indeed.

Sebastian stood in our living room looking like the good-looking dark haired devil he was.  His eyes were cast up to me as I descended the curved staircase. Had he knocked on the door?  Did he speak with my mom or David on the way in? Questions filled my brain but they weren’t the important ones.

Stepping to meet him only a foot apart he said, “I’m glad you’re ok.”  His accent was back to American now.  I was really going to have to ask him why he hid that dazzling Scottish accent.  However it made my resolve easier to pull off.

“Why are you here?” I said pointing my finger in his chest.  My words were cold and could have formed crystals in the air.  That didn’t last because the heat from his body began to melt that cold ice layer I’d formed.

“Look, I’m sorry for all this. I didn’t expect for her to show up here,” he said calmly.

“I don’t care about your girlfriend,” I said.

“She’s not my girlfriend anymore.  We’d already broken up before,” he confessed.

“It doesn’t matter who she is, because I told you we are just friends,” I said back.  Was that a pretty lie I was telling myself?  The succubus wanted him sure, but did I?

He almost looked hurt by that statement.  But with his eyes void of emotion, I couldn’t be sure. “So why are you mad?” he asked.

I couldn’t believe he didn’t see why I couldn’t be angry. “You cheated on your girlfriend with her sister and killed her.” I said with an exasperated expression on my face like Duh.

“I thought you didn’t care if I had a girlfriend?” he questioned.

I threw up my hands.  Apparently, demons didn’t understand humanity at all.  “Killing someone,” I said in a huff with wildly animated hands.  Then I added, “Moral character Sebastian, if that’s your real name.”

“I’m a demon. I have none. And yes that’s my name,” he began to elucidate. “But to clarify, Dana the girl in question isn’t really Bernadette’s sister.  Demon’s don’t procreate and the term sister is loosely used to reference they share the same sire.”

“It doesn’t matter.  You killed her.  How can I trust you?” I said.

“You can’t, but I will never harm you,” he said.

I looked at him. He seemed to gloss over the fact that he killed someone.  I wasn’t sure what I’d hoped for but I didn’t get it. “You should go,” I said stabbing my finger in his chest.  Touching him was so not helping me keep my succubus at bay.

He looked reluctant. “One more thing, did Bernadette leave on her own?”

I said nothing.  It was then, I heard them approach. Luke and Flynn had come downstairs.  Luke put his arms around me possessively.  I knew it was a power play, but I didn’t care.  I wanted Sebastian to understand and maybe my own internal demon needed to understand too.

“This is my boyfriend, Luke,” I said wrapping my arms around Luke’s.

Sebastian actually huff out a laugh.  Not a loud boisterous one but a laugh none the less. I was confused by it.  He seemed to recognize the look and stopped.

“Well, that explains everything, truly ironic,” he said.  He was most certainly surprised, because his word held a hint of that accent.  Not much but I caught it.  Then he pointed to my pocket.  I looked down and notice the slight budge indicating my phone was jammed into my jeans.

“You have my number if you need me.” He hadn’t given me his number.  I was about to pull out my phone to see if he’d called me, but I thought better of it.  With those final words he vanished leaving a thin gray smoke that quickly dissipated.  That was a first.  I hadn’t noticed the smoke before.

Luke’s arms dropped from my waist.  I wasn’t sure yet what that meant.

Chapter Twenty Four

illicit (adj.) forbidden, not permitted

Morosely, I looked at each boy. Luke looked at me quizzically, most likely trying to gage my mood. Flynn looked back at me with a careless expression.  I thought about my word of the day.  The word was illicit.  The words that showed up on daily on my phone through my word of the day application sometimes seemed more like horoscopes or maybe even prophecies.

“Bridgette is headed over. You guys up to hanging out?,” Flynn asked.

My answer was quick and snarky. “Quite frankly, I’ve had enough of girls with the names that begin with B,” I said and headed upstairs. “So you two have fun.”  I could think of a five letter word that described the girls in question better than their names.

Making it to my room,  I changed and got in bed thinking I was going to be alone.  Part of me hoped that Luke would have come, but he didn’t.  Was he upset about Sebastian?  I didn’t know.  Exhausted from head to toe, I closed my eyes praying sleep would come quickly.

Sometime during the night I heard my name being called.  It sounded far off in the distance and up close at the same time.  The dream I’d been having suddenly became vivid and alive.  I was running from Bernadette’s fiery hands.  I was running towards the voice that was calling me off in the distance. It felt like I knew the voice.  The name that called me was Kayla.  The voice was deep and different than Sebastian’s but no one else called me that but him.  In the dream, the light came again dispelling the voice from the distance.  I still couldn’t see what caused the light.  But when a hand circled around me, I jumped up from sleep in my bed gasping for air.  The glow of the television illuminated a figure on the bed with me.

“Are you alright?” a sleepy Luke asked me.

I swirled to look him in the eye.  Of the many things I could have said with my heart still racing from the dream, I said, “My mom’s going to kill us both if she finds you here.”  I hoped she would continue her avoidance of me.  I wasn’t really in the mood to explain.

“So we won’t let her find me here,” he said sounding more awake.

A thought occurred to me.  “I thought you went out with Flynn,” I asked.

“No,” he said sounding offended.  “I wasn’t going to leave you alone.  And no way I would let that Rat could come and pop you out of here,” he said.

So Flynn must have clued him into more details. “I’m glad you’re here,” I said truthfully, with a smile on my face. I laid back down to snuggle against him.

“I am too,” he said. “So where did he take you that time?”

I guessed wrong this time.  I thought maybe that subject was closed.

“Egypt, France, and London,” I said on a yawn.

“You’re serious aren’t you?” he asked.

I nodded against his chest and said at the end of another yawn, “Yes.”

“Why did he take you there?” he asked.

It was a loaded question that I didn’t see coming until after I answered. “He knew I wanted to see those places.”

He went ridged with my answer. “He’s seems to know more about you than I do,” he said, sounding a bit pissed.

I turned to look at his face. “What do you mean?” I asked, but I was sure I knew the answer.  I watched his eyes.  The blue was like midnight in the harsh glow of the television.

Surprisingly, his voice was suddenly calm and steady.  This time there was no real accusation in his voice. “I mean he knows your middle name and the places you want to visit.  I bet he knows you favorite color and food to eat.”

I kept my eyes steady on him. “He asked the right questions, but he isn’t the right person.” I laid my head back down on him to listen to his heart beating. He put his hand on my back and I understood then that he got my meaning.

“You’re right.  I didn’t ask,” he said.  Luke hadn’t asked me questions like that.  However those topics aren’t necessarily conversation starters so I didn’t blame him either.

“Why’d you come?” I asked. “Not that I don’t want you here, but I thought you were going to hang close to your Mom.”  I didn’t mention his Dad’s visit because that was I obvious.

“I couldn’t take the two of them anymore,” he said.  I didn’t want to press him about it right now so I left it alone.  “But more importantly, I needed to be with you, especially after our conversation last night.”

My heart fluttered.  Pressing myself closer to him I said, “I’m you’re here.  I missed being this close to you.”

He groaned then circling his arms tighter if it were possible.  I laughed.  I felt is eagerness to be closer still to me.  To allay the mood, I asked, “What’s your favorite color?”

He laughed which is exactly what I wanted.  He was here in my room and we were close.  I didn’t want to spoil things.  I simply wanted to enjoy being with him.  “Right now, it is whatever color you’re wearing,” he said.

We talked for a long while getting to know each other’s insignificant data like favorite food, color, music, band, television show and the like.  And things like where we like to shop and a few pet peeves. It was hard to get a favorite color out of him but eventually he said yellow just so I’d back off but then I pressed him for a reason for his choice.  I looked at his shirt.  He tried to dispel that he’d used his shirt color conveniently as his answer and told me it his reason was because it was the color of summer and sunshine.  He turned the tables on me but I was ready for him.

“What’s your favorite color?” he asked.

“Blue, like the color of the sky on a summer day.  Like the color of warm ocean that surround exotic tropical islands.  But mostly it’s the same color of your eyes,” I said softly nearing taking mine off him.

He went quiet on the end of my words.  I could see my reflection in him.  I thought he might say the words.  The words that held everything I found in his stare.  But when he remained silent, I continued.  “Sebastian doesn’t know of all my dream places to go.  My most illicit dream is to be on a tropical island on a private beach bare to the sun with the person I love.”

He groaned again.  “You’re killing me, Mercy.  Can I take you to the Bahamas tomorrow?”

I laughed. “I’m serious,” he said.

“More than anything in the world,” I said.  And that was the closest we got to the L word between us.  We talked until sleep claimed us both.  I couldn’t tell you who fell asleep first just that it felt amazing to be in his arms.

The next morning I woke alone and a little sad that Luke wasn’t there.  After I got ready I headed downstairs to inventory the list of items I’d asked David to procure for me after he’d come to me begging I cook Thanksgiving Dinner the other night.  I wasn’t surprised he was the one to ask since the things hadn’t gotten any better between my mom and me.

Lightly, I pranced down the stairs and to the kitchen in a really good mood but stopped short frozen upon seeing my mother in the kitchen.  Her short blond hair was spikier than normal, so she probably just woken up and had come directly to the kitchen for coffee.  She was behind the counter so I only saw the black tee she wore with a pink terry robe on top.

She halted, locked in my stare.  She shifted in her stance and I heard slipper feet against the cool ceramic tile.  For a long moment we didn’t say anything.  I wanted to reach out to her and overcome the bitterness between us.  Something in her eyes said she did as well, but her words were different.

“I thought we talked about this?” she asked, her words were like venom.

I was puzzled by her statement.  I’d expected at least a good morning or hello.  But her question hadn’t reached home.  There were so many things we hadn’t talked about I did know what topic she could be referring to.

“About what?” I asked.

“About boys,” she said through clenched teeth.

Fine, if she wanted to have this conversation, I was ready.  Things needed to be said. Questions she needed to answer.  “You mean, Luke?” I asked.

In response, she nodded her face with relief as if I was getting a point she silently conveyed.  I can’t say I was there yet, but I was on the fringe.  I had deep emotions and needed to say something to my mother confessing my feelings to shock her in reality.

“I love him,” I said.  It was a completely true statement, but after saying it out loud solidified it for me. I hadn’t thought about anyone else since he’d come.  Thinking about him made me smile which was why there was a huge grin on my face at this very moment.  The look of absolute horror was on my mom’s face.

“He’s not right for you,” she said in a shaky breath.

My mother’s fastidious beliefs for me were totally unfair.  This made me angry, so my voice grew louder with each passing word, “How would you know?”

She looked shocked by my response and said with utter terror, “It’s forbidden.”

I wanted to yell back at her my feelings aren’t illicit, but instead I replied, “According to you, everything is.”  It appears that I’d woken the house with my words.  I heard movement.

“You don’t understand,” she began but her gaze move from my face to somewhere behind me.

I turned to find Flynn and Luke standing by the edge of the staircase.  Most likely they’d come to see what the ruckus was all about, Flynn for the second morning in a row.  Hearing my mom’s slippers in retreat, I understood when I turned back she’d be gone.  I turned anyway and saw that David stood in the hall near the kitchen.  Rotating back, I stormed upstairs past the two boys without a word.  I didn’t slam my door this time although I wanted to.  There was no point.  I wasn’t mad at the people still left in the great room who would hear and feel my anger through a childish act.

My mood however did improve as the day progressed.  After being calmed by my ever patient boyfriend, I’d been coaxed back downstairs to do one of my favorite things in the world.  Flynn and Luke acted as my Sous-chefs while I prepared our Thanksgiving feast.  It turned out really fun and we laughed almost coming to blows in a food fight.  However, after washing, chopping, dicing, prepping, I think they both came away with a greater appreciation for the art of cooking.

While the turkey cooked in the oven for a couple of hours, Luke and I walked down to the pier for some alone time.  We sat with our legs dangling dangerously close the ice cold water.  I tried not to remember Flynn and Bridgette here in the water a few days ago or being here with Sebastian.  I just wanted to enjoy this moment with Luke so we could have our own memories of this place.

We held hands and he didn’t press to kiss me even though I wanted him too.  I had searched frantically for the lip balm this morning and couldn’t find it.  I had to hope that I’d carelessly left it in the jeans pocket I’d been wearing the night before our trip and the balm would be somewhere in my laundry basket back home.

“What are you thinking about?” Luke asked.

I’d been thinking about the lip balm, so I blushed knowing I would never say that.  Instead I said, “I just so glad you’re here.”

I met his cornflower blue eyed stare with a flutter in my stomach.  I didn’t feel cold despite the fall air. When his face began to descend on mine I felt powerless to stop it.  A war raged inside me for the mere moment it took for our lips to connect.  I should have stopped him but I so wanted that connection.

With an explosion of monumental proportions, I felt lifted off the ground soaring through the air with his kiss. It felt as though I had wings and wind breezed through my hair.  Stars of golden light burst behind my closed eye lids as I was certain I’d gone to another universe.  The electricity between us woke me to what a mistake I’d made.  I pulled back and got to my feet.  I looked at him only briefly to make sure he was ok before I made my escape.  Tears were in my eyes when he called to me but I didn’t turn back.

In the safety of my room, I pressed my back against the door before I flung myself in the direction of my bed.  I collapsed on the white down comforter of my bed in tears.  I scolded myself for my mistake.  I could have killed him and he would have let me.  That would have to stop.  Face down in the mattress I heard my door open but made no movement to see who it was.  How had I succumbed to temptation?  I couldn’t even blame it on the succubus.  That had been all me.  I had no one to blame but myself.

Feeling the bed dip, I turned my face to breath for the first time. “I’m sorry,” said Luke.

Maybe in my tear fits I misunderstood him. “Why are you sorry?  It was my fault.  I knew better.”

He brushed my hair damp with tears from my face. “I don’t want to make you cry.”

“I could have killed you,” I proclaimed.

“You didn’t. Nothing happened,” he said.

Nothing happened, I thought.   For me the earth moved.  Firework exploded in my vision. But then I was succubus and he wasn’t.  Maybe this was how it was for me when I took the life force from another person.  But I didn’t quite remember this happening with Paul.  I was so native then, maybe that had something to do with it.

“Maybe not for you, but for me it was electric,” I said turning my face back to the bed not wanting to see his expression for my sappy description.

“Oh, it was electric for me too. But I meant that nothing happened that would end my life,” he said matter-of-factly.

I sat up now wanting to get a good look at him. “Why did nothing happen?” I asked as if he would have answers.  The more he said nothing I thought I saw answers hidden behind his eyes.

Right then Flynn burst through the door again without knocking.  “Your oven timer is going off,” he said.  God was Flynn’s radar that good.  He seemed to have the uncanny ability to ruin a moment.

I stood wiping my eyes and left the room to finish dinner.  Ok maybe this was a critical moment.  Talking should have been more important than food.  But there is a timing to cooking that can be disastrous if missed.  The turkey was the main dish.  I had to make sure it didn’t burn.  Then again, I might have been just afraid enough not to want to know.

Around the feast of food, we sat at the dining room table all hands joined. I glanced about as nervously as Flynn, my mom, and David did.  I think we were supposed to have our heads bowed eyes closed, but I wasn’t raised with religious beliefs.  I did believe in a higher power especially with the knowledge that I was part demon, but I never attended church.  Knowing what I was now, I didn’t think I would ever go in the future.  I wasn’t sure if it was sacrilegious, but it didn’t seem right.  On the same note though, I didn’t think that there was anything evil about Flynn, my mom, David or I.  We may have been part demons, but I wouldn’t say I was on the side of evil either.

When Luke finished the blessing or prayer, we all hesitantly said Amen.  That was probably the weirdest thing I’d ever done.  After a long period of silence hung in the air maybe because of the prayer or maybe because everyone waited for tension to burst between my mother and me, David finally broke it by talking about football.  The game was on and the guys immediately perked up to chat away about the teams that were on or coming on.

I kept peaking up at my mother who was looking at me placidly.  I’d heard nothing of the sports conversation.  I ate some but pushed most of my food around lost in thought over everything.  How was I going to fix this mess?

“Mercy,” Flynn said.

I turned to look at him. He was looking at me like he was frustrated.  Had he been trying to get my attention long? “What?” I said.

“Have you heard anything?” he replied a little on edge.

I looked around the table as all eyes were on me.  I shook my head in response of no.

“Dinner, was lovely,” David said heading off his son’s aggravation that I wasn’t riveted to his every word.

“Thanks,” I said simply.

My mom stood and said, “Yes, it was excellent as always,” She spoke pleasantly.   I blinked in response.  She walked away with her plate and I guess that was the best thing she’s said to me in days.

David and my mother had sat on either end of the table while Flynn sat across from me.  Luke was between my mom and me.  David stood and reached to place his hand over mine before patting it lightly.  “We’ll get the dishes,” he said.

I placed my napkin on the table and moved to sit on the sofa.  Flynn rushed to beat me to the remote.  He turned on the game they’d been so briskly talking about and didn’t notice my frown.  I didn’t baulk though.  Not moving either, I just watched the game.  Rather, I watched the commercials mostly which were the highlight of the night.  Thoughts busily bounced themselves off the inside of my skull.

Why hadn’t heard from Paul?  And what would I say when I did talk to him?  The feelings I thought I had for him were muddled to say the least.  He was my friend.  Luke was my boyfriend and I loved him.  It should be that simple.  But Paul had to throw a wrinkle into our relationship by kissing me.  So why should I feel so bad that he had?  I hadn’t asked for it and frankly he was too late.  I’d moved on.  Hadn’t he with Amber and all the couple others before her.  But he was my best friend and for that I did feel bad that we were at odds with each other.  So why couldn’t he even be bothered to talk to me?

Maggie was busy with her family and new friends.  She hadn’t called me and I hadn’t either.  We had been inseparable in the past.  No day had ever gone by without us communicating.  But lately days had gone by and neither one of us had troubled ourselves to make contact.  It seemed everything was changing.

Oh, then there was Sebastian, the handsome boy-demon or whatever he was.  I couldn’t deny the physical attraction I felt for him.  So what if the succubus within me had a crush if that were possible.  The problem was I think part of those reactions belonged to me.  I mean it wasn’t as if the demon could live outside of my body.  But the boy was a mystery.  But his character was in question.  However, he’d never harmed me and he’s had ample opportunities.  In fact, he’d saved me.  I wish someone could save me from myself.

Soon I was flanked on either side on the sofa by Luke and Flynn.  They were glued to the game and the commercials.  I probably could have gotten up and they wouldn’t have noticed.  But for me, their presence made me aware of the television.  Soon, I was even able to I find myself laughing at the million dollar commercials some companies put out there.  Somehow my troubles were forgotten in that time span.

When the doorbell rang we were all momentarily stupefied.  Who would drop by unannounced on a holiday?  Flynn stood as he was the only proprietor of the place nearby and opened the door.

From my view I was sure it was Chris and someone else at the door.  Flynn opened the door wider letting them in.  Chris was still terribly cute. His hazel eyes surveyed Luke and me.  I greeted him before Luke did.  Luke didn’t introduce himself so I assumed they knew each other.  This wasn’t unexpected because Luke had come here with Flynn numerous times.

The lean man with Chris looking much like an older twin except his skinned was more of mild chocolate rather than caramel.   He was taller than Flynn with broad shoulders.  He was an opposing figure standing in dark slacks and a cream color wool sweater.  He was regal in a way that wasn’t snobby.  When I finally caught his glance I saw he had the same remarkable eyes Chris did.  So most likely he was Chris and Tamera’s father.  Flynn had gone to retrieve his dad leaving Chris and his dad alone with Luke and me.

Chris stepped to me and said, “Mercy, this is my father Michael.”

I stood to give him a proper greeting.  Stepping towards him, I reached out a hand.  When Michael took it, it looked like he was holding the hand of a doll instead of mine.  I felt like a small child standing next to him.  Although I would have expected him to crush my hand he seemed to have control over his strength.  Gently but firmly, he gave me a hand shake clasping his other hand on top of the one he already held.

“Nice to meet you,” I said with a warm smile.  Although I didn’t know him, somehow I could tell he was good natured.

“You too, Mercy,” he said giving me back my hands.  I went back to my spot on the couch after offering them something to eat or drink.  They’d decline on both accounts.

When Flynn returned David, my mom followed them into the great room too.  They greeted Michael and introductions were given for my mom’s benefit.  Then they stepped outside into the night and Flynn returned to my side the couch.

Chris came over and sat on the chair cattycorner to the couch.  “What’s the score?” he asked.

Luke rattled off the important stat information giving a brief run down as to where the game was.  Funny thing was, I think I followed the explanation.  The Cowboys were playing the Redskins and beating them convincingly but there had been a recent turnover.  This meant the Skins were still in it and had fighting chance.

“So what’s going on Chris,” Flynn said during a commercial.  I was a little annoyed that they were talking now.  I was finally enjoying this part of the entertainment.  I didn’t care about the game.  But I realized this might be important so I turned just as a Doritos commercial ended.  I stifled a chuckle at it when Chris spoke.

“One of us is missing,” he said dryly.

The television was now surely forgotten.  All eyes were on Chris waiting for more details.  When he said nothing I asked, “Who is she?”

“Tommy’s older sister who works in New York.  She was headed home for the holidays and never showed up.”

Luke spoke up now. “Did she contact anyone along the way?”

Chris nodded before answering. His eyes looked tired and sad. “Yes, she called when she made a stop at a truck stop just outside of town to get gas.”

Nothing was ever simple these days.  The reason they were here was obvious.  They think someone like us was involved.  Flynn spoke up and said, “So how can we help?”  Flynn face was serious.  It was a genuine question to offer assistance.

“She should be able to handle herself.  So we have to assume that she’s dead.”  His statement was flat with no emotion.  I didn’t know if that was his personality or that of his shifter nature.

Looking down, I picked at my fingernails.  I didn’t know what to say.  I didn’t know who the girl was but still I wouldn’t wish death on anyone.  When the door opened and our all parents walked back in, Michael gestured to his son.  Apparently, it was time to leave.  We said our awkward goodbyes and waited while the shifters got in their car.  Supernatural beings typically have enhanced abilities that included hearing.  So nothing of consequence was said until they drove off.

“What the fuck?” Flynn said, one the car had cleared the driveway.

“Flynn,” David said admonishing his son.

“Whatever, they think we had something to do with it don’t they?” Flynn said.

David glanced down at his foot before meeting all our eyes. “Not necessarily.  They felt a foreign present in the woods recently that matches no one they met.”

We waited in silence for David to finish looking at Flynn from our perch on the couch. “Well Chris mentioned the two demons in the woods the other night,” David said to Flynn.  It was clear that Flynn hadn’t told him and David was not happy about finding out about this from someone else.

“I forgot, other stuff happened,” Flynn said.

“What stuff?” David asked.

Flynn looked away.  David must have understood Flynn silence. “Ok, later but the point is, they didn’t think those two demons were the cause,” he said pausing for a moment. “They also don’t believe we’re the problem either although some in their clan won’t rule us out.”

“Shit,” Flynn said.  “I can’t believe this.”

“Flynn, watch your tongue,” David chided again.

Flynn rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to the television.

“So we’ll leave early, tomorrow perhaps,” David said.

That got a rise out of Flynn. He stood up meeting his father’s gaze head on. “It will look like we’re running,” he shouted.  I wanted to say something but Flynn was doing a great job of expressing his feelings and I had to agree with him.  Luke just looked and I could tell he was thinking about something.

David the embodiment of calm said, “We weren’t really given a choice,” he said.  “But first we are going to help with the search.  I need you both to stay here with Mercy.  Don’t leave the house for anything.”

“Dad, I haven’t fed tonight,” Flynn said solemnly looking a bit embarrassed to admit that.

David looked at his son with wide eyes. “You can’t hold out,” he said cryptically eyeing him with more meaning in place of the words he didn’t use.

Flynn looked at him and nodded. “I should be fine,” he said.  Flynn deflated and sat back on the couch.  My mind wandered back to the shifters.  So they hadn’t come to exchange information but rather to ask us to leave.

We made plans to leave tomorrow around midday so no one would have to get up early.  My mom and David headed out to help with the search.  And I solemnly headed to my room to pack.

Chapter Twenty Five

legerdemain (n.) deception, slight-of-hand

Luke followed me into my room and surprising Flynn barged in shortly afterwards.

“Look guys, I have to go.” Flynn said.

Luke and I both turned to stare at him.  The move almost looked choreographed.  I was also certain we both held the same perplexed expressions.

“Your dad said,” I proceeded to say.

“I know, but I have to go,” he said with a surety in his voice that spoke volumes over the words he used.

“How bad off are you?” I asked.

“Bad enough, I can’t wait,” he said with no hint of legerdemain in his tone.

I stopped myself without asking any further questions.  Not having a life or death need to feed, I certainly couldn’t understand what he was going through.  Luke nodded to him and said, “Be safe.”

Turning my fire brimmed eyes on Luke, I waited for him to really see my anger before I spoke.  “Flynn you can’t go,” I pleaded.

“Luke can protect you,” Flynn said.

“That’s not the point,” I protested.

“Fine,” he said on a sigh. “Maybe I can get her to come here.”

“Are you crazy?  Do you want to put another girl in harm’s way?” I asked.

His eyes narrowed. “What do you want from me, Mercy?”

“Take it from me,” I said, shocking everyone in the room.

Now it was Luke’s turn to look at me with cold fury pointed in my direction.  “What,” he said indignantly.

I didn’t hesitate.  Instead I gave all my attention to Flynn.  “It’s not like you need sex, right?” I asked because I wasn’t quite ready for that type of heroism.

“No, but,” Flynn began.

“I am human enough?” I asked.

“Sure, but,” he said.

“Then it’s settled,” I said with finality.

Luke turned me towards him. “I don’t get a vote in this?” he protested in a not so friendly voice.

I just looked at him for a moment.  “Luke, you know this means nothing.  And frankly I don’t understand your objection.”

“You think I want my best friend kissing my girlfriend?” he asked outraged.

“You both can’t say that you all didn’t play spin the bottle with each other girlfriends in the past?” I half asked half stated the rumor mill theory for the basis of my defensive.

“Yeah, but that was different,” Luke said.

I rolled my eyes and landed them on Flynn.

“He means, none of the girls really ever matter to us,” Flynn said answering for Luke.

I turned back to Luke and he looked away pushing his curls back as his hands passed over his head in frustration.

Walking to him, I crossed the distance that he’d put between us.  I placed my hand on his bicep. “Luke, you know I wouldn’t offer if there was any other way.”

I could read the pain in his eyes.  Could I accept if our roles were reversed?  Probably not, so I added, “If you really don’t want me to, I won’t.”

His eyes burned into mine.  So many thoughts passed through his with things left unsaid. I couldn’t help but crack a joke so I could wipe the hurt from his face. “I guess you could always kiss him,” I teased.

Flynn snorted then said in the background, “I think I’d rather take my chances with death.”

There was a exhale and then a flicker of a grin on Luke’s face.  It gave me the courage to turn but not move away from Luke so I could see Flynn’s eyes.  “So you’re telling me that in the face of death or kiss Luke, you’d be willingly die?”

“Hell, yeah,” Flynn said with no hesitation.  We all began to laugh.  The tension had been cut but the problem remained.

Luke pushed off the wall he’d back into for support. “I can’t watch,” he said to no one while he made his way to my door.  So that was how he’d given his approval to this resolution.

Flynn stopped him. “I need you to referee.”  My eyes widened again as did Luke’s.  “You need to stay here to make sure it doesn’t get out of hand.”

Luke stared at Flynn with a blank face.  Maybe he was as astonished because I’d expected the scowl on my face mirrored in his.  The tension level rose again.  “You can’t control yourself,” Luke managed to say.

Flynn spoke giving Luke blank face back. “It’s not me I’m worried about.  It’s our untrained succubus here.”

“Me,” I said annoyed.  My finger was pointed at my chest while I stared into Flynn’s face.

Luke reached up fisting his hair as if he was in pain. “I don’t think I can do this.”

Flynn said. “Don’t watch but be in the room.”

“I don’t want to listen either,” Luke said.

“Turn on the television,” Flynn said.

“Then how am I helping?” Luke asked.

This whole exchange had gone on without me being acknowledged.

“It really shouldn’t take too long,” Flynn began. “If it does, then there is a problem.”

“What should I do if there is a problem?” Luke asked.

Flynn took a breath. “Then break us apart but try not to touch her.”

Now it was my turn to say something. “Why?” I asked turning from my finger to open my palm face up.

“Because it may bring your darker half,” Flynn said to me.  He didn’t have to say my succubus demon for me to understand what he was referring to.

I turned away.  What was I contagious?  Suddenly, I didn’t feel so sure about this plan.  A several painful minutes later, Luke positioned himself on the other side of the bed looking out the window.  The television was turn on low volume.  I stood nervously listening to Flynn give me instructions.

“Keep the succubus at bay and it will be over quickly,” Flynn said.

“This is a onetime offer, McCallister.  Keep better tabs on your power levels,” Luke said through gritted teeth. He was being a bit possessive. I could have said something like ‘I can do what I want’.  But I put myself in his shoes and kept my mouth shut for the moment.

“This better not be some legerdemain ploy of yours,” I said.

He frowned. “What?” he asked.

Luke answered, “She means deception.  But Mercy if he is, don’t worry I will kick his ass for the both of us.”  God he was cute and smart too.  I had to give him extra cool points.

“You’re such a little walking dictionary,” Flynn said while grinning. He put his hands on my face.

“Is it over yet,” Luke said.

“I haven’t started,” Flynn said through his own gritted teeth now.  He drew me near and leaned down.  I wanted to shout that I wasn’t ready.  My heart fluttered a little.  Flynn was still super attractive and I remember what it felt like to kiss him.  It wasn’t a hardship.  Luke honestly would be really upset if he knew how much Flynn had taught me on this trip.

When his soft lips touched mine, I held a gasp in my throat.  I didn’t want to make this harder on any of us.  But lip to lip contact it seemed wasn’t enough to feed his hunger.  I let him draw me in parting my lips.  His tongue mingled with mine.  With my eyes closed I gave myself over to him.  It was a subtle sensation that if I wasn’t hyper aware of what was going to happen I might have missed it.  I felt a tiny tug and give inside. The pleasure seemed to grow and I lost myself.  It woke.

Flynn must have recognized the change because he tried to step away.  The demon in me wasn’t having any of that and put a death grip on his head.  Things went totally out of control after that.  Thinking back later I’d wondered just how thing had gone so wrong.

Sebastian decided then to pop in. “What the hell,” he exclaimed.

Luke stood and moved with amazing speed to the other side of the bed where Flynn and I were lip-locked together.

Sebastian yanked and threw Flynn off me before Luke made it around the bed.  Then just as fast, Sebastian grabbed me pulling me to his chest before Flynn hit the wall with a solid thud.  My beast was totally happy at the site of Sebastian.  She rocked my body on him pushing him against the very wall Flynn was slump on.  My mouth was feverish on Sebastian’s when light and darkness flashed leaving my arms empty gravity pulling me to the ground. Sebastian was just gone.  Luke’s hand was on my arm so he was pulled down with me.  The next thing I knew I was pinning Luke to the ground on all fours.  My fever was spreading.  I guess it was contagious.  Subsequently, Luke’s hands were in my hair with mine in his.  We were like one body.

Not having any control, I felt myself reaching under his shirt.  His muscles were solid under my hands.  Firmly, I slid them up further until I had each peck firm in hand.  Then he pulled me to him with a fist full of my hair guiding my mouth to his.  Zealously, we kissed unconcerned of our surroundings.  When his hand slid down from my hair gliding across my spine to stop at my bottom, I quivered.

“Shit,” I heard Flynn say.  Then I felt hands trying to pry us apart.  It took a while, but too soon I was alone on the floor breathing hard.  Panting, I heard a door open. Fighting for control I remained still with my eyes closed.

“I can’t leave her, what if Sebastian comes back” Luke said.

“You stay over there then,” Flynn said flatly.

“It was you two that first got out of control, so you can’t stay with her either.”

Flynn said, “Fuck.”

My vision dimmed and I heard a voice in my head. ‘Kayla, come to me’.  I sat up.  Distantly I heard voices in the background.

“What the hell,” Luke said.

“Don’t touch her,” Flynn said. “You see her eyes.”

My body got up and walked through the darkness on a path that was lit in some unseen way.  “I’m coming,” I said out loud.

“Who is she talking to?” someone said.

“I don’t know, shit!”

‘You’ve been a bad girl, Kayla,’ the mysterious voice in my head said.

“I know. I’m sorry,” I said out loud.

“Don’t let her go outside,” I heard from somewhere far off.  None of it seemed important.

‘Come to me,’ the louder voice in my head said.

“Mercy,” a voice yelled.  Something in the tone brought me back.  With my hand on the doorknob I turned back.

“Her eyes are normal.”

“Grab her then.”

I felt the arms around me and the lit path faded.

When I woke the next morning, I thought that would be the worst of what would happen to me.  But something else would happen that would change our plans drastically.

Chapter Twenty Six

quagmire (n.) a difficult situation

My SAT word today was quagmire.  I was definitely beginning to believe that the application that I’d downloaded as a means to expand my vocabulary and prepare me for the ominous test was instead an omen for my life.  Today’s word embodied what happened next.

The call came at the ungodly hour in the morning.  The shrill of my cell phone was persistent.  I wasn’t hung over from alcohol but the memories of last night had me wanting to hide under my covers for the rest of my life.  Finally I dragged myself out of bed to pick get the darn thing that sat on my dresser.  I turned back to my empty bed closing my eyes because apparently Luke hadn’t stayed with me last night.

“Hello,” I vaguely said.

A rush of gargled words hit me like the sun stepping from the darkness.  I’m sure my face wrinkled up in confusion trying to understand through the sobs what was being sad.  One thing was clear, it was Maggie.  I hadn’t bothered to look at the display prior to answering because my eyes had been barely opened.

“Maggs, slow down. What’s going on?”  More garbled words but I thought I made out a name.  That name was Brent.  I can’t say I was proud of my feelings but I was glad that name hadn’t been hers, Paul’s, or even any of her family’s names.

“What’s wrong with Brent?” I said feeling more awake.

“He’s in the hospital,” she said in between sobs.

“Is he alright? Where is he?” I asked feeling more frantic.  I silently cursed myself because I still wished no harm to him.

“I don’t know. New York. Will you meet me there,” she said still sniffling.

“Of course,” I said.  I wrote down the hospital name and got a few more details out of her before rushing out of my room.  I wasn’t sure where Luke slept.  He wasn’t in my room which made me feel worse.  Did he hate me?  Were we going to break up because he couldn’t trust me?  But now was not the time to search for those answers.  Not wanting to waste time I rushed through Flynn’s unlocked door and found him sprawled out over his bed.

He lay in nothing but boxers.  I stopped taken aback.  The wind was knocked right out of me.  I heard enough stories about boys in the morning from Maggie in giggling fits but never encounter this first hand.  Not this way.  I wasn’t sure if I should approach but then my brain clicked back in.  Having no choice, I walked to the side of his bed.  I reached out a tentative hand not sure what to do.  Before I touch him, his eyes flew open.  He reached for my hand and tugged.  I fell on the bed almost across him.

“Why are you sneaking in here, Mercy?” Flynn said.  I felt my cheeks flush and comprehension left my brain when I was face to face with him.   My hand was pressed against his bare chest.

“Uh,” I said.  Flashes of kissing him last night trailed across my open eyes.

He smiled. I turned bright red.  Apparently, I’d done nothing last night to damage our relationship.  I hoped I hadn’t encouraged him though.

“Brent,” I was able to utter.

“What about him?” he said, as he released my wrist.  I rolled off the bed to fast trying to move away from him.  I fell and currently my bottom was now sprawled on the floor.  He rolled on his stomach and eyed me there.

“What is it?” he said again.

Laying there unmoving not sure I could stand to see his ass in boxers, I told him in a regurgitation of words what I knew.  After everything was out, he shot out of the bed and in his bathroom.  I stood and made my way out of the room not wanting to be here if he decided to step out of the room naked.

After closing the door behind me, I knocked this time on the first door next to Flynn’s. I got a sleepy response from Luke.  Prepared for me to come in, I didn’t have the same experience I did with Flynn when I entered.  He was fully under the covers but a girl could dream.  I stayed focused and explained.  I hadn’t been able to read any animosity in his eyes, but what I did know is that he hadn’t sleep with me.  That was a first for us.  Every time we were together overnight, I’d woken up to him lying next to me.  But again, my concern was for Brent, so this discussion would have to wait.

In about an hour Flynn and I placed our bags in David’s car and took smaller ones to Luke’s car.  We would ride with Luke up interstate ninety five to New York.  Flynn took shotgun and I sat stretched out in the back seat watching the two boys who sat in front.  Luke’s golden hair was still damp from a shower.  His long sleeve baby blue shirt peeked at me between his seat and the head rest.  Flynn’s hair didn’t have a hair out of place and it gave me pause to wonder how much time he put in to make himself perfect or did it just come natural.  He wore a mint tea long sleeve graphic tee and jeans looking like a model for Lucky Brand and damn him for that.

I felt like a peasant girl next to these two in navy easy breeze drawstring waist top and light blue jeans.  I had my long chestnut hair pulled up in a high ponytail.  Like Luke it was still a bit damp from my hasty shower.  Soap was pungent in the air of the confined car and I was still reeling from my phone conversation with Maggie.

She may have been a lot of things lately, but she was my best friend and had called me when she needed someone the most.  It was that act that made my insecurity about our friendship disappeared.  I couldn’t believe I had allowed myself to doubt the strength of our bond.  I wanted to be happy that Luke was here to drive me.  But my doubts about Maggie had been replaced with doubts over my relationship with Luke.  None of us spoke about what happened the previous night.

Luke and Flynn were focus on the problem that faced us this very moment.  They had been Brent’s friends for a long time.  They would have gone to check on him even if Maggie and I weren’t entangled somehow.  But it didn’t matter.  I was on my way to lend support to her.  She was coming in from Connecticut and likely would make it before us.

Flynn closed his phone and I looked up at Luke. “Were you able to find anything out?” I asked.

He shook his head and said, “No, not much except he is in surgery.”

Luke spoke up, “Do we know anymore about just what happened?”

Flynn answered, “Not much.  Something about an animal attack while they were hunting.”

“Hunting,” I said shocked.

Flynn turned to look at me. “Yes, they were hunting Bambi. Does that bother you?” he said somewhat disgusted.  I wanted to give him a pass seeing his friend was hurt.

But It did bother me so I said so.  “Yes,” I said.  My anger didn’t show through though. I wanted to say that’s incredibly mean.   But instead I said, “Animals have the same rights to live on this planet as we do?”

Flynn’s retort was quick and painful for me. “This from the girl who made us turkey for dinner yesterday.”

I was silenced.  What could I say?  I wasn’t a vegetarian. But the thought of being the person killing an animal to eat sickened me.  It may be hypocritical but it was the truth.  Out of sight out of mind as the saying goes.

The subject was closed because I’d clearly lost.  Flynn didn’t goat me on any further.  Instead he said, “Can you hand me the paperback out of my bag?’ he asked.

I hadn’t expected him to say that.  Maybe a little grateful but still perplex.  Neither he nor Luke had brought up the debacle of last night.  So I didn’t move I just stared at him.

“My bag,” Flynn asked again.

I looked up not sure I heard him correctly and sat up leaning over to the backpack on the floor behind the passenger seat.  I unzipped it to reveal a paperback novel of Stephen King’s ‘Thinner’.  I pulled it out zipping the bag back and handed it to Flynn and said, “You read?”

Again he looked at me. “No,” he said. “I only look at the pictures.” He rolled his eyes taking the book from my hand and sitting forward.

I knew what I said sounded wrong, but I didn’t really think he read for recreation at least not boys like Flynn.  Paul was an avid reader but despite his status change to popular he was still a bit of a nerd at heart.

“I didn’t mean that,“ I said and Flynn turned back and looked at me.  There was so much I didn’t understand about the boy. “I just didn’t think you read anything outside of school,” I said, abashed at me previous comment.

Surprisingly he didn’t have a smart remark, he simply said, “It helps me sleep.”

I turned the question to Luke but didn’t correct my previous blunder with my words.  I guess lack of sleep didn’t help me be more tactful. “Luke, do you read too?” I asked.  For a moment I’d forgotten that I wasn’t certain of our status.

He laughed and I realized my mistake, “I mean,” I began.

“I know what you mean and yes sometimes,” he said.

I sat back in the seat thinking that my thoughts about boys maybe so wrong.  I, like so many girls, thought boys were mostly shallow and only talked about girls and sex and played video games.  But these two handsome boys actually read and that shattered every preconceived notion I had.

Luke asked me a question. “What about you?  Who are you favorite authors?”  I didn’t answer trying to read through the lines of his casual conversation.  Are we ok?  I hoped so.  I really did.

I pondered the question for a moment longer, and then said, “I really like John Grisham.”

Flynn perked up, “Yeah, I really liked ‘The Firm’, his first book.  Which of his books are your favorites?”

That sparked a conversation that kept our minds off of our reasons for driving to New York and my lust craze from last night.  I found out that Flynn was a big fan of Stephen King and Luke liked Douglas Preston and Lincoln Child although both had read Grisham.  I would have never guessed.

We ended up stopping at the last rest stop in Maryland to stretch our legs and get some food.  I also was in dire need of the bathroom.  The place was pretty crowded and I couldn’t help to wonder where everyone was headed and why.  I was sure though that most weren’t driving to hospitals to see friends who could be dying.

Heading back to the car to meet them I passed Flynn leaning on a black sports car talking to a pretty brunette who had nothing but eyes for him.  I shook my head and kept heading to the white BMW Luke stood next too.  Luke had his hands in his jeans looking at the sky which was a perfect cloudless blue. When he looked down at me I could see how weary he was.

I stopped right in front of him looking at the ground when I reached him.  I didn’t know what to say.  I was afraid.  His hand cupped my chin raising my face to meet my eyes.  I squinted because the sun was now in my eyes.  Gently he pressed a quick kiss to my lips.  Letting go of my chin he encircled his arms around my waist.

“You forgive me,” I said softly.

“Forgive what,” he asked.

Not wanting to go into details I said, “Last night.”

“It wasn’t your fault,” he said.  I put my arms around his neck and pulled him down to give him a kiss on the cheek.  I wasn’t going to think about our kiss yesterday and let it bother me if he wasn’t.  If both of them were letting it go, then so would I.  I would however need to talk to them about whatever spoke to me in my head. Later, I rationalized.

“You look tired. Do you want me to drive?” I asked.

His lifted me off my feet and laughed. “You can drive?” he asked back not answering my question.

Back on my feet I stepped back feeling indignant. “I can drive,” I said sourly pouting a bit.

Flynn joined us and said, “You can drive.”  He gave me the look and I remembered my dumb question about them reading.

“Fine, I deserve that,” I said. “But truthfully, I’ve had more sleep than either of you. I can drive for a while.”

Both boys looked at each other in silent conversation.  I took it as another jab and spoke up for myself. “Just because I’m not rich like the two of you to have my own car doesn’t mean I can’t drive.”  I reached for the back door of Luke’s car having said my peace.

Luke caught me and pulled me back. “We were just joking Mercy.” I was pressed in his chest as he hugged me while the two of them laughed.

“You can drive my car anytime you want,” he said.  “I am ok to drive, but if you really want to,” he added letting me out of his embrace.

I looked over to Flynn who arched an eye brow up at Luke.

“Just let me know if you get tired,” I said defeated and got in the car.

“I’ll drive,” said Flynn.  Luke gave in easily and walked around the car.  I wanted to protest at how simply he given up the reigns to Flynn and not to me.  But I didn’t want to pout.  He’d offered me the keys and I hadn’t taken it, so I would keep my mouth shut.  I closed my eyes in the back seat still a little peeved.  When my eyes opened later, we were at the South Hampton Hospital where Brent was.

Once parked and headed for the waiting room the nurse had sent us to, I was dumbstruck at how crowded the room was.  I wondered how many people were in surgery when Luke reading my mind told me all the people in there were Brent’s family.  There must have been over twenty people.  Luke told me that Brent’s mother was of Italian decent and his father was Irish.  That explained it all to me.  Both Italians and the Irish had strong family ties.  I felt a little pang of envy.  Having such a large family seemed nice.

I kept a smile on my face even though I would meet many people that day I would probably never see again.  This act reminded me of the people I’d met at the lake house and might not see again. Sebastian’s face instantly popped in my mind.  Out of all the people I’d met there, he was the only one I was unsure if I desired to see again.  Certainly the wolf pack, who had literally sent us packing was not on my list to see again.  Chris was nice enough but the fact that somehow they believed us partially or wholly responsible made me not want to see them again.  Putting things in perspective, I decided that even though Flynn’s dad and my mom were marrying, I might just avoid going back to the lake house again.

While I passed through the room in search of Maggie, the somber faces didn’t help my worry about Brent’s mortality.  Even though people were milling about in small conversation, the crowd seemed to part revealing Maggie sitting in a chair between two other girls around our age.  Both had their hands on Maggie’s back with her own hands covering her eyes hiding her sobs.  I couldn’t hear her from so far away with all the conversation, but I knew it could only be Maggie with the mane of red curls.  I promptly moved forward to her with Luke and Flynn at my heels.

“Maggs,” I said softly when I reached her.  She didn’t look up right away and I wasn’t sure if she’d heard me until the two girls looked up.  Both of them quickly looked passed me and to the boys that stood on either side of me.  They jumped up stepping forward, flinging themselves into the boys’ arms.  In any other situation I might have been jealous of the girl who cried Luke name.  She was pressed so tightly to him.  But for now my focus was on Maggie.  I stepped forward and sat down at her side in one of the vacated seats.  I put my arms on her back rubbing gently and instantly she fell into my arms.

“Eme,” she said and continued to cry.  It was so evident that Maggie was in love. Her heart was breaking with the thought of losing him.  Whatever had happened to Brent, he was in dire straits based on her emotions.

“Everything will be fine,” I said.  I didn’t know if that were true because I hadn’t yet the full story behind why he was here.  But in times like these, what else could you say.  I was at a loss for any other comforting words.  But I resolved to be here for her in whatever way she needed me.  Thankfully, my few words of encouragement had so easily tumbled out of my mouth.

A few minutes later she sat up.  I looked into her green eyes that were red-rimmed. She wiped at them. “I’m glad you’re here,” she said.

Just then a man in blue scrubs walked in the room.  His presence commanded attention from everyone.  It was clear he’d come to bring news of Brent’s condition.  Those who hadn’t been standing stood including Maggie and me.  The crowd was still parted so we had a good view of the doctor when he spoke.  “Brent’s parents have given me permission to speak to you.  I wanted to inform everyone that Brent made it through surgery and is in stable condition.”

There was a collected sigh of relief from everyone.  I patted Maggie’s back instinctively.  The doctor’s words had ended for the extended family because that was all he said.  He gestured to whom I had to assume must have been Brent’s parents and proceeded to walk out the room with them.

I’d gotten a good view of his mother.  She was elegant with long black hair, olive skin, and deep brown eyes.  She held hands with a tall imposing man of fair skin and light reddish hair.  He looked like a ancient Viking.  I turned back to look at Maggie.

“See, everything will be fine,” I said clasping her hands.  We sat down again.

“Yeah,” she said quietly.  Her tears had slowed.  She didn’t speak for a while.  She just leaned on my shoulder.  We sat like that for a while before I looked around for Luke or Flynn because they’d disappeared.  I was looking to my left when someone sat next to me on my right.  I turned to meet Luke’s eyes.

“Maggie, do you need anything,” he said leaning forward to meet her eyes.

She turned slightly and was about to speak when Flynn strode up with a tray of steaming cups and a brown bag of something.  He bent down and sat the tray down in the chair on the other side of Maggie.  Standing erect he said, “Maggie, I brought you.” and Maggie bolted up out of her seat and fiercely hugged Flynn.  He rocketed on his heels nearly falling.

No one, not even Flynn, was more surprised than me.  I didn’t think she really liked Flynn all that much.  She never had anything good to say about him.  In fact we almost fought a couple of days ago when I defended him over her narrow minded views about him.

Flynn’s eyes looked at me for a second before his outstretched hands finally gave in and hugged her back.  Then awkwardly he patted her back and said calming words like “It’s ok.”

Luke looked at me. I muttered, “It’s a quagmire,” I shrugged before he stood to relieve Flynn of Maggie.  Flynn let Luke take over for him as Luke had a natural ability to calm people.  Flynn sat next to me and offered a cup of hot liquid.

“No coffee,” I said.

He said, “I’m not a big coffee lover either.”  I took that to mean that it wasn’t coffee he was offering me.

I nodded and took the offered cup.  A long sip of the warm liquid let me know it was in fact hot chocolate.  When Brent’s parents walked back in the room, Maggie made a beeline for them.  Luke came and sat on my other side as Flynn handed him a drink.  We didn’t speak about Maggie’s odd behavior.  She was in shock and her grief was great, so it understood that she sought comfort wherever she could get it.

“You guys disappeared,” I said pausing.  “Did you find out anymore?” I asked.

Luke said, “Yes.”

But Flynn jumped in which was just like him to want to be the center of attention. “Brent and his family were hunting in the East Hampton reserves.”

“With guns?” I asked.

“No, with bow and arrow,” he said.  I wasn’t sure if he was being flippant but let him continue. “Brent said he was tired and left headed back to the car.  He was attacked by what they think was a bear.”  He looked at me then Luke before continuing. “After hearing Brent’s cries for help, his cousin was first to get to him and saw the beastly thing shaking him like a rag doll.”

Now it was my turn to gasp.  Flynn continued on like he was telling a ghost story fully animated. “His father showed up and shot at the thing.  That part is a secret because firearms weren’t allowed during this season.  Hunting with guns isn’t allowed until January.”

He stopped, giving us opportunity to asked questions which was apparently what he wanted.

“So what happened next?” I asked spurring him on.

“The bear or whatever it was ran off.  Brent had deep gashes in his chest near his heart.  That’s why he was in surgery.”

Something in what he said struck me.  “Why aren’t they sure it was a bear?”

He shrugged.  “It was dark and it could have been a black bear or a grizzly. I don’t think either is prevalent around here.”

I personally though that it was splitting hairs whether it was a black bear or grizzly, I mean they’re both bears.  But I didn’t bring that point up.

Maggie came back her face lit up like a Christmas tree. “They’re going to let us see him,” she said then took off again to walk with Brent’s parents.  I thought things were definitely better now that it appeared Brent was going to make it, but I was dismayed relatively soon after Maggie’s departure.

The two girls that had been comforting Maggie before I took over both showed up with cups in their hands.  Each sat next to the boy they’d flung themselves at earlier.  My focus of course was on the one talking to Luke.  I didn’t give her eye contact but sat with eyes forward listening intently to what was said next.

“I brought you some coffee,” the girl said.

Luke held up his cup I was able to see in my peripheral vision.  Was the girl that dumb not to notice he’d held a cup in his hands?  I nearly shook my head but knew that would give me away.  “Oh,” she said. “Well, I guess I’ll have it then.”

“Adelina, this is my girlfriend Mercy,” he said taking my hand and leaning back so she could see me.  Adelina must have been related to Brent on his mother’s side because she had the same wavy black hair and olive skin.  She was a pretty girl with delicate features I could hate.  I almost did since it was clear she was interested in my boyfriend.

The girl’s face changed from grin to a thin line.  She didn’t hide her disappointment at the news.  Luke must not have noticed because he continued. “Mercy is Maggie’s best friend.”

“Hi,” she said with obvious dislike.

“Hi,” I said back with an extreme grin and a hand outstretch for hers.  She looked down and shook it quickly.

“Well, I should go find my mother,” she said. “It was nice to meet you Mercy,” she added drolly.  Then she smiled at Luke, “It was good to see you again.”  She walked off and I somehow kept my mouth shut.

He hadn’t done anything wrong and in fact he’d done everything right.  His first words had been to shut her down by introducing me, so I wouldn’t broach the subject.  Who was I to talk anyway after getting myself into that mess with Flynn last night.

Hearing my name I turned to Flynn.  He said, “Mercy, this is Adriana Luca, Brent’s cousin.” I looked in the mirror image of Adelina.  I hadn’t noticed they were twins because I hadn’t really paid much attention to either of them.  Adrianna’s hair had been pulled back and that had been the difference for me until now.

I extended the hand to the smiling face of the girl.  She took my hand and gave me a warm. “Hello.”

“Adriana, this Maggie’s best friend, Mercy” Flynn said and Adriana nodded making a small noise in agreement.  “Mercy’s also Luke’s girlfriend.”

“Oh,” Adriana said dragging out the word. “That’s why Adelina left.” She laughed then said, “Don’t get me wrong. I’m not laughing at you. My sister used to date Luke,” she added.

Luke who had been holding my hand visibly tensed. “So she must be pissed. I guess I should go find her. It was really nice to meet you,” she said and in an odd way I like her.  She was friendly and straight forward.  She bent after standing and gave Flynn a kiss on the lips.  He smiled up at her and watched her walk away.

I stood too.  Keeping a smile on my face I said, “I need to find a restroom.”

Luke stood and pointed. “It’s right outside this hallway on the left.” His hand took my arm like he wanted to say something else.

I gave him a warm smile, he let go and briskly walked away.  Once out of the waiting room I let my smile falter.

Chapter Twenty Seven

perfidious (adj.) disloyal, unfaithful

After I was sure I was alone in the bathroom, I found myself assessing what I looked like.  Standing in front of the mirror, I pulled out my hair band and fingered through the waves.  I looked down at my slim hips and long legs, they didn’t compare to tiny waist and curvy hips of the Luca sisters.  Why was I letting that Adelina girl bother me?  Luke had made it clear that he wasn’t interested in her.

I pinched my cheeks and pursed my lips a few times to bring the rosiness to them. To be honest, I felt like the ugly duckling next to that girl.  I still didn’t see the beauty my mother in my face.  Leaning close to the mirror, I could see my own red-rimmed eyes for tiredness.  I was completely wiped out.  It had to be my weariness that was fueling my insecurities. So I pulled my hair back up in a high ponytail and stepped out in the hall.

As soon as the door closed behind me, a boy that was walking by stopped and did a double take in my direction. “Hi,” he said taking a step back to stop in front of me.  I have to say that I smiled; my ego had needed that reaction from someone at that precise moment.  It was quite flattering after a quick bout of lack of confidence.

“Hi,” I said back.  It was the polite thing to do.

“I’m Tony, Brent’s cousin,” he said holding out his hand.  “I saw you inside,” he said pointing to the waiting room.  I took his offered hand.  Looking at his olive skin, I knew he too was related to Brent on his mother’s side.  He vaguely looked like some of the people I met inside.  I had to tilt my head up a bit to meet his amber eyes.  He was really cute with dark wavy hair and a kissable mouth.  Why did I notice that?

Trying desperately not to focus on his mouth I said, “I’m Mercy.  I go to school with Brent.”  His smile widened wickedly.  I recognized the look.  I should mention my boyfriend somehow, I thought fleetingly.  But he hadn’t actually hit on me.  At this point it might be a bit presumptuous to add that fact, so I said nothing while Tony continued to grin at me.

“Well, you look like you can use some coffee.  Can I get you some?” he asked breaking the silence.

A boy walked quickly by us down the hall who caught Tony’s attention. “Hey, Tom,” Tony beckoned.

The boy named Tom stopped and stepped back over to us. “Hey,” he said looking at Tony and barely acknowledged me.  Although Tony for most girls was date worthy, it was Tom who held my attention.  He was about Tony’s height with wispy longish brown hair and silver gray eyes.  He dressed like a skater boy with his gray hoddie zipped half way and long khaki shorts that extended past his knees.  He looked so unlike Tony who wore a black button down shirt paired with immaculate jeans.

“Tom, this is Mercy.  She’s a friend of Brent,” he said.  Although Tom’s gaze finally turned to me, it was as if I wasn’t there.  He looked right through me.  Something in that stare however suggested he was caught in his own thoughts and maybe a little frightened about something.

Tony didn’t seem to notice because he looked at me and said, “Tom here is Brent’s cousin on his dad’s side.”

I would have guessed Tom was related on his father’s side with his fair skin. But all I said was, “Hi.”

Tom looked back at Tony and nervously said, “I’m headed out.  If you see my dad, tell him I’ll meet him at the house later.”  Then he walked off without a backwards glance.  I noticed the small chain that draped from a loop in his waist band of his shorts to his back pocket.  I was curious what hooked on the other end.

While Tom walked down the hall to the exit, Tony said, “So, can I get you that coffee.”

I wasn’t really up for company and didn’t think with Luke here it would be wise to accept. “Thanks, but I’m fine,” I said.

He said, “Well, I guess I’ll see you later at the house then.  I nodded and he trotted off after Tom calling his name.  Tom walked a bit clumsily with wide steps as if he was trying not to let his pants fall off.  Tony stride, however, was smooth.  It showed the confidence I felt from him. I caught a bit of him asking Tom if he could tag alone.  I didn’t hear Tom’s response but since they both exited together, I assumed he said it was ok.

I looked back to my left at the open doorway that led to the waiting room.  I found myself heading in the opposite direction.  I followed the signs for the cafeteria making a few turns here and there.   After passing the exit Tony and Tom used a minute ago with a few more turns later, I finally walked into the spacious cafeteria.

The place held several counters with hot and cold food selections.  I picked up a bowl of fresh fruit and retrieved orange juice from a cooler.  After I paid the clerk, I walked straight back to a group of small tables for two that line the far wall.  Sitting, I turned my chair so I could lean back on the wall and have a clear view of the room while I snacked.

The place was half full, yet it was truly quiet.  People spoke silently to one or another and I could only assume like me, coming to this place was not a joyous occasion.

Looking around, I found people of all walks of life, the old, the young and everything in between and no one had happy faces.  It was quite depressing.  Then I heard a small laugh and searched the room for it.  I couldn’t see the laughing person because her back was to me.  But the way her head titled back cascading her long blond hair in gentle waves, I was certain that the happy sound had escaped her throat.  The creepy factor rose when I noticed the man she sat with.  He stared intently at her with empty black eyes.  He had a pleasant enough face, but it was eerie how he looked at her.

I should have turned away, but I found that I was glued to him taking in his features.  Certain aspects of him reminded me of someone, but darn if I knew who at the moment.  When his gaze drifted past her and landed on me, a shiver rocked through me.  On top of that I was embarrassed by my own inability to turn away.  When he gave me the wicked grin he originally had focused on his companion, I blinked before I was able to look away.

Focusing my eyes again on something else, helped me block my view of the man.  I looked up to see blue scrubs and thought of the doctor that had come earlier to give everyone the good news.  Looking up a little further, I could see it wasn’t that doctor.  This guy was a heck of a lot younger.  His smile was infectious and made his charming face radiate.

He held a tray one handed and sat at the table to my right turning his chair like mine so ultimately we were sitting next to each other our backs to the wall.  This position gave us a view of the whole room.  I had to give him cool points for that move because he didn’t have to ask my permission to sit with me without appearing rude.

“I saw you with the Mitchell family,” he stated before putting a fry in his mouth.

I decided that maybe I might be able to get some answers from him so I said, “Yes, are you his doctor?”

Before he added another fry to his mouth he said, “No, but I was in the emergency room when he came in.  And no, I’m not a doctor at least not yet.  I’m a first year resident.”

His humility only added to his appeal, but I hoped he might tell me something more than we knee right now.  “Can you tell me what happened?” I asked.  Mentally, I kept my fingers crossed that he would.

“Well, he was in bad shape when he first came in.  It looked as though he should have died.  The bear had a tight grip on him based on the wounds.  We worried that its claws may have punctured his heart.”  I was riveted by his information.  I hadn’t really known how dire it could have been.

He continued. “His arm was nearly torn clean off, but I hear Dr. Cunningham was able to get it mended together.  I hear he’s a football player.  That’s tough because it is unlikely he will play again.”

That news tore at me.  It wasn’t like Brent needed a football scholarship or anything like that but he had been heavily recruited at least based on what Maggie told me.  He wasn’t the shiniest bulb in the bunch and football may have been his main reason to attend college.  I wondered silently if he still would.

“But you should know all of this unless,” his eyes got big. “Unless you aren’t family.  Damn, I should know better.”  He said.  “Tell me you’re not a reporter,” he asked sheepishly.

Reporter, no I’m only a high school student is what I should have said.  “No,” I said exaggeratedly. “He’s not family but I am family friend.”

He seemed a bit relived.  “If the family doesn’t say anything, can you keep that last bit to yourself?  I could lose my job and career over a slip like this,” he said putting his hands to his face pulling back the skin as he moved his hands to his hair in frustration.

“Really, your secret’s safe with me,” I said feeling bad that I may have caused him trouble.  He turned away for a moment.   It appeared he wasn’t sure if he still had an appetite.  I looked up then moving my head a little to the right were the creepy guy had been sitting.  I saw his table was now empty.  Relief washed over me because I really didn’t wanted to see him.  So why had I even searched for him again?

“Since I may lose my job over this little conversation, can I asked you your name,” he said smiling slightly.  I noticed he’d closed the lid on his lunch so I was certain he did lose his appetite.

“It’s Mercy,” I said, giving him a polite smile back.

“Brad,” he said.  I looked at him curiously. “I mean, my name is Brad.”  I watched his finger fidget with the fork as he twisted in circles between his fingers.  It was really cute how nervous he seemed.

“I should probably get back from my break.  If you aren’t busy maybe I could take you to dinner,” he said timidly.

Wow, a college guy destined to be a doctor was asking me out. Well I started to say.

“Oh, I guess the family is probably getting together later, huh,” he said.  I nodded thanking him for the out.  He stood taking his tray.  I looked absently at my own bowl of fruit I hadn’t eaten yet.  He looked down at me just as Flynn and Luke walked into the room.  “It was really nice meeting you,” he said.

Quickly I said, “You too.”  I hoped he would be far away before they spotted me, but it was too late.  They’d seen him talking to me.  Future Dr Brad passed them before Flynn turned back giving him a once over.  Suddenly, the fruit looked heavenly.  I shoved more than a mouthful in my mouth to avoid the conversation to come.

Luke sat in the recently vacated chair by Brad and said, “We were looking for you.”

I pointed to fruit leaving my palm up gesturing that it was the fruit that brought me here.  I shook my Simply Lemonade in my hand prepared to wash down my fruit as soon as I swallowed.  I cracked open the bottle when Flynn spoke.

“I bought you a bagel,” he said holding out the bag.

After I swallowed I said one word before taking huge drink, “Fattening.”

Luke then asked the question, “So who was that guy.”

Darn, he wasn’t going to let that go.  I guess I couldn’t blame him.  But truthfully, I’d been on my very best behavior with Adelina.  Trying to keep the answers short I said, “Doctor,” then I proceeded to shovel more fruit in my mouth.

Flynn not really getting it said, “I guess you were really hungry.”

I nodded while chewing slowly but vigorously.  I wouldn’t want to choke or anything.

Luke looked at me and said, “Are you mad at me about Adelina?”

I shook my head no dramatically, giving him an expression that said, that’s a crazy thought.

“You sure,” he said.

Still chewing, I almost got dizzy with my head changing directions.  I nodded yes I was sure.  I swallowed the food and chased it with the lemonade.  Figuring the worst was over I didn’t yet take another bite.

“Are you jealous ?” he asked.

Hell yes, I wanted to say, but I just stared at him no longer chewing for a long moment. “No,” I managed to say quietly.  “Do I have a reason to believe you’re being perfidious?”  I asked.

But with the look on his face I was positive I had no reason to mistrust him.  “Now, I know this one,” he said, holding his phone out with the word on the day displayed there.  Luke doesn’t have it in him to be unfaithful, Mercy,” he said absently to me.

Luke didn’t speak.  And I read everything he didn’t say.  It was hurt that I didn’t trust him.  He didn’t press me though.

“I do trust him, but the question is does he trust me,” I said, putting it out there.

Luke face changed to an expression of incredulity.  “I do,” he said stridently.

Flynn picked a strawberry out of my bowl before I could slap his hand away.  He had it in his mouth before I could get it back.  Strawberries are the best part of the fruit bowl and no matter who prepared these prepackaged bowls never gave you enough so I was sad to see it go.  I was about to make a smart remark when he beat me by saying, “We can see Brent now.”

“Really,” I said grateful for the subject change.   The tension died.

“You finished?” Flynn asked.  I pushed the bowl over to him assuming he’d eat it anyway.

I looked back at Luke ready to offer him some, when the look on his face said he still didn’t believe I wasn’t mad about Adelina.  So I leaned over and gave him a super quick peck on the lips.  “You look tired, we should go see Brent and find a place to get some rest,” I said.

He smiled at me.  But then his eyes searched mine and I wasn’t so sure my strategy worked.  His earlier action today with Adelina hadn’t been perfidious but had mine? I didn’t know but I kept the smile plastered to my face emitting warmth.

We had to take the elevator to Brent’s room.  His parents were leaving out when we came in.  Luke and Flynn greeted them and introduced me.  His mother and father were both very nice and I couldn’t help but think Brent was truly lucky just like Maggie in that area.  Flynn, Luke and I, all only lived with one parent.

Brent shoulder seemed swollen but it was wrapped with so much gauze, I couldn’t be sure.  I stepped over to the chair Maggie occupied, while Flynn and Luke flanked either side of the bed.  They were both so tall, they had to lean in to listen to Brent muffle words.  He must have been really loaded with a lot of pain killers.

“How is he?” I whispered to Maggie.

She turned with her Irish twinkle and said, “He’s going to be fine.”

“That’s good,” I said. “How long will they keep him?’  I knew she would have all the answers.

“They say he should be able to leave in a few days,” she said, beaming a smile that was brighter than the brightest star.  I gave her a hug just before the nurse came in. She neatly told us that Brent had a lot of visitors, but he needed some rest.  Our visit was cut way too short.  Maggie talked the nurse into letting her stay.  Her reasons were that his parents had asked her to remain until they got back.  So with partings words for Brent to hang in there, we left.

Back in Luke’s car, I didn’t know what we were going to do.  “Are we going to Brent’s parents’ house?” I asked.

Luke said while pulling out the lot, “No, we can stay at my dad’s house.”

Luke’s dad had a house in the Hamptons.  In shock, I didn’t say anything until we arrived.  When we drove up, the word house didn’t quite cover the extent of it.  Manicured expansive lawns and hedges that framed the modern day chateau with its sandy brown brick façade made for the mansion it was.  I had to wonder just how rich Luke really was.  I certainly was out of my element.  Money had never been important to me.  But it seemed Luke, Brent, and Flynn had it in spades.  Interestingly, none of them really acted like it.  They never made me feel like I didn’t belong because I wasn’t rich.  More of my preconceptions shattered.  I needed to rethink everything.

Parking in front in the circular drive, I tried not to act like a tourist.  I took a look around but kept my gawking to a minimum.  I didn’t think they would be bothered by my dropped jaw, but I thought it would be rude to do so.  We entered a huge foyer on tile that echoed our footsteps.  The style and decor were a dead giveaway that Luke’s dad owned this house.  It had the twin staircase that was also found in Luke’s house back home.  The main difference was this house and everything about it was twice maybe even three times larger.

Luke turned to me and said, “You can have any room upstairs of your choosing.  I’m going to contact my Dad and let him know we will be staying here tonight.”

I saw him pull out his cell phone, so I headed up the right staircase to pick a room.  To say I was eager to explore was putting it mildly.  I wasn’t overjoyed by the richness of the place.  It was more like I felt like a doll exploring an amazing doll house for the first time.  My feet didn’t make a sound on the marble staircase.  The rubber soles of my chucks barely pattered as I made my way to the second floor.  Up at the top there was a long corridor that spread to either side of me.  I walked to my right along an expensive rug that lined the hardwood floor down the middle.  I walked a bit before on a whim, I absently opened a door.

Behind it lay a large room not much larger than the one I’d inhabited at Flynn’s lake house.  It was elegantly furnished with mahogany pieces not my taste, but I knew they must cost a pretty penny.  Even with the amount of decorating in the room, nothing in there seemed truly personal.  So I assumed it was indeed a guest room and dropped my bag on the ground.

I decided a quick warm shower would be just what I needed to bring on the sleep that I had held at bay for so long it just eluded me.  Taking my Juicy sweats that I planned for bed out of my bag, I laid them on the bed.  I only had one more outfit besides the sweats in my bag for tomorrow.  So I would dress for bed even though it was still pretty early.

With my clothes in hand, on the second try, I found the bathroom I knew would be attached to the room.  The warm water of the shower loosened my muscles.  I had a hard time turning the water off.  After the shower, I combed out my damp hair and let it stay loose.  The white tank top I wore rose high on my hips leaving a gap between it and my hip hugging sweat pants.  I pulled on the matching hoddie which was meant for style not warmth.  I left it unzipped as I walked out of the bathroom and into the eyes of Luke.

Feeling self-conscious I crossed my arms over my chest.  “Hi,” I said.  At this point in our relationship, I shouldn’t be so shy.  Luke’s hands had been on me on more than one occasion.  But still I felt my blood color my cheeks, giving my emotions away.  He gave me an approving once over and I felt the other worldly entity inside me stir.

“I thought I’d take a shower below lying down,” I said nervously, but excited all at the same time.  I couldn’t lose control again.  What would Luke think of me?

“I can see that,” he said as his eyes roamed me again.  Flames burst inside me and I bit my lower lip trying to hold myself back from flinging myself on him.

“You know what is so interesting,” he said taking a step towards me.  A part of me wanted to move towards him, but I was still partially in control.  So I took a retreating step back bumping into the dresser.  The solid wood didn’t give an inch with my weight on it.

He gave me a look of worry.  I knew he thought that I was afraid of him.  But really I was afraid of myself.  The succubus inside me was growing in strength and I could feel it.  It had no care for my virginity.  We were nearly alone in the house, unsupervised like last night.  The difference was this time there was no one that stood between us from moving forward to the next level except me.  I really cared for Luke, but I wasn’t ready for that step not to mention I had no desire to steal his life force.

He made another move towards me with nowhere left for me to go.  I held my ground.  I fought my instincts to reach for him.  Fire grew in my eyes as I surveyed his mouth.  “No, what’s interesting?” I was finally able to say responding finally to his previous comment.

“Of all the rooms in the house, you picked the one five doors down on the right, which is my room,” he said.

“Gosh,” I said exhaling, hoping to regain some control over the mischievous beast inside me. What were the odds that I would select his room?  “I’ll just pick a different one.  I’m sorry I didn’t know,” I rambled on.

But he was there now with his hand on my face.  I knew he would kiss me and I would fully lose control at his touch.  With his hand in my hair and the other on my waist touching my exposed skin I yielded to him waiting for his lips to meet mine.

The door opened and Flynn strode in saying something I didn’t know before he realized what he walked in on.  He looked at Luke who now turned back to him and then he looked at me.

“Oh, there you are Mercy. I was looking for you,” he said.  His eyes roamed between both of us.  I couldn’t blame the look after what happened last night.

I couldn’t see Luke’s expression, but I heard his emotions in his voice. “What could you possibly need with Mercy at this very moment,” he growled.

Flynn took a moment to think.  It was a moment for me to regain some control and I was certainly grateful for his interruption.  “I can’t get in touch with my dad and I need to let him know where we are staying tonight.”

I kissed Luke’s cheek and said, I’ll be right back.  I moved away leaving Luke behind.  Following Flynn out of the room, he took my arm in a vice grip.  He pulled me down the stairs and through the center hallway to the kitchen.

“What the hell,” he said in a whisper.

I wasn’t confused by his anger towards me.  But I had done nothing wrong. “What are you talking about?” I asked.

“You let it out again Mercy,” he said still whispering. “Didn’t you learn anything after last night?”

I paused to think.  I did lose control but how did I have control over Luke.  “Luke cornered me,” I said, but even to myself I sounded unsure.

“I saw it in your eyes,” he said.  But our conversation was soon ended when Luke walked in.  Possessively, he put his arms around my waist and nuzzled my neck.

“Can you save that for when you’re behind closed doors?” Flynn said jokingly.  But I caught the flash disapproval in his eyes.

I didn’t feel however that stepping out of Luke’s embrace would send the right message to him.  He may take it as rejection.  Yet his touch still had the same effect on me.  The succubus wanted out.  I knew as well as everyone in the room that with no control it was too dangerous for it to be freed.  But I made no movement from Luke to save myself.

“Jealous,” Luke said then kissed my neck.  It tickled and I trembled.  I should have noticed this was out of character for Luke.  Never had he been this openly aggressive.  Or had he?  I remember our make-out session in his car at lunch.  Finally, I moved to turn around so he would release me but with his arms locked around me I was only able to turn to face him.

Clearing my throat I said, “I’m hungry.”  I swallowed.

He smiled and let me go. Flynn handed me his phone and I called my mother.  Luke and Flynn began discussing what we could get to eat while I waited for my mom to answer my call.  I ended up leaving a voicemail and looked around the kitchen.  The cabinets were a cherry wood color and the appliances stainless steel.  Too bad they were all void of anything edible.  Luke said that his dad didn’t live here year around and since no one was expected, there wasn’t any food in the house.  So with little discussion, Luke left with Flynn to find something for us to eat.

Flynn eyed me on the way out and I felt scolded like a child.  But who was he?  I knew what I was doing, I thought defiantly as the door closed on their departure.  But honestly, I felt deflated.  I wanted to explore but sleep called my name.  So much so, I didn’t bother to choose another room.  Until last night, Luke ended us sleeping with me anyway.  So, I fell on Luke’s bed curled in a ball and stumbled my way into deep sleep.  Even as I drifted off to la la land something inside me hoped Luke would be here when I woke up.

Chapter Twenty Eight

prepossessing (adj.) occupying the mind to the exclusion of other thoughts or feelings.

Nestled in Luke’s embrace was how I woke up.  Gratefully I placed my hand on his.  My stirring woke him as well.  He brushed my hair from my face and kissed me on my cheek.

“Afternoon,” he said.  Feeling refreshed, I must have slept a while.

Content in his arms I smile instinctively.  “Afternoon,” I said.  For practical reason I hoped with us being so close that my breath was still pleasant.

“I’m sorry about earlier,” he said.  I had no answer for him.  Flynn seemed to think it was my fault.

“You know I would never push you into anything you weren’t ready for,” he said continuing.

I opened my mouth to speak but he gave me one of his famous airbrush kisses.

“I should warn you that Flynn invited Adriana over and well now it seems we may have a party on our hands.”

I didn’t know why everyone was going to celebrate. “A party, Brent’s still in the hospital,” I said with dread.  Really I didn’t want to deal with the evil twin who wanted my boyfriend.

“Apparently, since he is on the mend, it’s cause to celebrate,” he said sounding as if he wasn’t as keen on the idea as I was.  “About Adelina,” he said.

I knew what he was going to say. “You don’t have to explain,” I said.  Sleep can do wonders for your mind.  I knew that I had been overly obsessed with him and Nina and now Adelina but something had changed in me. “She’s your past.  I do trust you.”

That brought a genuine smile to his face and he drew me near.  Our lips touched quickly before he pulled back.  I smiled up at him enjoying the fact that he understood me and trusted me enough for that quick contact.  He was acting like himself again.  Something had been wrong earlier.  I was sure of that now.  That added to whatever went wrong last night; I was beginning to believe Sebastian was right.  There was something different about me.  I was affecting Luke, I was certain of it.  Could the demon power inside me truly be contagious when in close contact?

He got off the bed and helped me to my feet.  Perhaps, I should have spoken up, but I didn’t.  Instead I walked to the bathroom to brush my teeth and rinse my mouth out before we headed downstairs.  Something told me the party had already started.

Well, sufficed it to say it had.  There were a bunch of people out back.  From the deck, I had a clear view of the ocean.  The view was spectacular.  The crashing waves cresting then rolling gentle up onto the sandy beach should have been relaxing to look at.  But the sand beyond the deck area held a bunch of people tossing a football.

I caught the sight of the Luca sisters and my mood soured.  Tony showed up but I didn’t see Tom.  There were also others I didn’t know.  Then I saw Flynn tackle who I thought was the Adriana.  I didn’t know a lot about football, but the girl didn’t have the ball.  So the physical contact wasn’t necessary to the game.  That was Flynn.  On second thought giving him the benefit of the doubt, he probably needed to feed.

I sat in on a deck chair with Luke next to me. “You don’t want to go play?” I asked flirting.

“Are you going to play?” he asked back.

I would have if not for the Luca’s. “No, but I’ll watch.”

“I prefer to stay with you,” he said.  God, points for him, he could be so terribly sweet.  With his arms around my shoulder, we watched the game which really wasn’t a game at all until more guys showed up.  The girls were suddenly obsolete when it became serious competition.  Things were about to get beat your chest manly.  I could see it in their eyes.

Luke was watching as the guys huddled, most likely talking strategy while I watched him. He had the gleam too. “You should go,” I said. “I’ll be fine with you prepossessing my mind.”

He smiled first then looked hesitantly. “Are you sure?” he asked.

“Yes,” I said shooing him away using my hands in a sweeping motion.  Never stand between man and sport, I thought.

It hadn’t taken much convincing.  I watched his long strides down to where the guys were convening.  His back side was just as intoxicating as his front.

The sun was high in the sky.  I had to raise my hand above my eyes to shield them from the sun’s glare.  Luke looked back my way to make sure I was ok.  I nodded and he turned back to his new teammates getting his instructions for his role in the game.  I watched for a while as the game ensued.

Flynn and Luke were on the same team which hardly seemed fair for the rest, in my opinion.  They most likely had a rhythm the others didn’t.  I was shocked when it became apparent that they had switch roles.  For today, Luke was quarterback and Flynn was the receiver.  This made the game more interesting for me to watch.  I found that I happened to like football better than most sports.  I didn’t understand all the rules, but it clearly was better than basketball.

Even though Flynn and Luke were in new positions they maintained control of the game.  Thankfully, they had the sand because it wasn’t flag football they were playing.  They were playing full tackle.  When the door to the house opened, I heard a somewhat familiar voice amongst the many female voices.  I stood, not really wanting to meet up with the evil twin.  Thus far I have been able to avoid her.  Suddenly, most of the girls came tramping through the door talking about what cheers they would perform for the boys playing football.  The wicked twin past with them without a backward glance to me.

After they cleared the deck, stepping onto the stone path that led to the beach, I headed in the house.  I really wasn’t in the mood to watch the girl make a play for my boyfriend with silly cheers and gyrating motions I was positive would be a part of most of their cheers.  I rolled my eyes to myself picturing just how she’d say those cheers.

I was about to pass the kitchen when I stopped not sure who I was looking at.  When the girl grinned and waved at me, I faltered.  It took me a moment to realize it was the good twin I saw.

“Hi,” she said.  Her face was perky and friendly.

“Hey,” I said back.

“Mercy, this is Brad.  He worked on Brent in the emergency room.  He was getting off work, so we invited him over.”

I nodded at Brad who gave me a grin and an quickly raised his eyebrows.  I’d hoped she hadn’t notice the look in his eye that spoke volumes about his intentions and the fact he already knew me.  But when she quickly made excuses and left, I was assured she’d gotten his message. Damn.

I could only hope she wouldn’t run to Flynn or Luke and blab about this.  Furthermore, I did want her to tell her sister.  Somehow I doubted she wouldn’t keep her mouth shut, so I would need to get Brad to leave.  I should just tell him that this was my boyfriend’s house or that he was here, outside but my words were stifled when he spoke.

“I was hoping to find you here,” he began.  “When I ran into the twins at the hospital they told me everyone was getting together here.”

Shoot, he had this quirky little smile that had an effect on me beyond words.  Was it the natural instincts of the predator inside me that kept finding me in situations like this?

“Well, you found me,” I said leaving the conversation open for him to make his intentions known.  I thought maybe if he did, I could then slip in that I had a boyfriend without sounding like a jerk.

“I did,” he said with a grin. “I was hoping meet up with you and entice you to a late lunch since I didn’t eat earlier.”

When I didn’t immediately answer he added, “I’m meeting up with some friends later, so really I just stopped by for a little bit if you’re up to it.”

I spread my hands over the boxes of pizza that smelled heavenly to my hungry stomach.  Before I could speak he said, “Yeah, I guess lunch is covered.”

I made no attempts at letting him know that I had yet to eat so I said, “Yeah.”

“Well, foiled again.  My attempts at chivalry aren’t working.”

He was so quirky and cute I said, “The guys are all playing football out back.”

He shook his head.  “I am too clumsy for that.  I was always better suited for team manager.”  I took a quick look at his bare arms and saw his biceps were firm and had a bit of bulk.  I stopped myself from telling him he must be working out on a regular with arms like that.

Instead we laughed then he said, “I guess maybe another time.”

I nodded, knowing I wouldn’t see him again.  The likelihood our paths would cross was slim to none.  He smiled at me again then headed out the kitchen to the front door.  With a small wave and a simple “Bye,” I headed the opposite direction to the back.  I felt a tiny bit of guilt about not telling him I had a boyfriend but really nothing happened between us.  And in a small way, I hoped I’d helped his confidence by not shutting him down.  I was sure one day he’d make some girl very happy.

So I walked outside with a satisfactory smile on my face until I caught a vision in my peripheral.  I turned slightly right to see my boyfriend pressed against the wall with the nasty hyena twin’s lips firmly on his.

My jaw dropped open.  I blink a few times trying to make sure it was true.  I couldn’t fathom what I was seeing.  But there it was.  My vision began to blur through my sudden tears.  I turned back thought the door I still held open and ran.  The door gave a satisfying thump as it slammed shut behind me.  I found myself running straight through and out the front door.  I saw Brad about to put his car in gear.  I called out with my arm raised like I was hailing a taxi, “Brad, wait.”

He must have seen me because his car stopped.  Snagging the door handle like it was my lifeline to safety, I jumped in.  Just as I closed the door, I looked back at the front door and saw Luke.  He stood framed in the doorway with pleading eyes.  No calling out, he just watched with pain filled eyes as I drove away with Brad.  Sneaking, I wiped a tear looking away.  It was too late.  What was done was done.  I pasted a smile on my face for my unwitting savior, Brad.

“Changed your mind?” Brad asked.

I looked at him thinking that what I had done had been incredibly stupid.  First of all, I didn’t know Brad at all.  What I did know, was that killers come in all shapes and sizes.  But if I assume he’s the nice guy he makes himself out to be, still I’d left without my phone or wallet.  I was purely at his mercy.  Yeah, I know about the play on my name but it was the truth.

“Pizza is fattening,” I said jokingly, hiding my chocking sobs in apparent laughter.  I watched his smile grow before he turned his attention back to the road.  “So where are we going?” I asked now assessing the situation.

“There is a little bistro down the road a bit if you want,” he said.  That sounded promising.  If I had to walk back maybe it wouldn’t be far.  I kept my eyes on the road, so I would know my way back.

“Sure,” I said.

My emotions were a hot ball of pop rocks in my stomach as we drove on.  Though it was a short drive, I had all the time in the world to think about everything wrong about my circumstances.  Brad was a resident at the hospital, which meant he had to be at least twenty one.  Jail bait was the description of me when it came to him.  If he was worried before about spilling confidential information about Brent’s medical case, being with me could land him in jail.  Then of course, I didn’t know really anything about him.  I’d barely said a few words to him.  What if he was the serial killer that was on the loose right now who seemed to be following my every move?

I watched houses go by and tried to memorize every turn.  The sad thing was since Luke programmed his number in my phone, I really didn’t think I knew it.  I didn’t know Flynn’s phone number either.  So if I had to make an emergency call, I would have to make a choice between Maggie and my Mom.  If Maggie was still in the hospital she may not get reception.  Would my mother answer my call?  The number I’d call from wouldn’t be a familiar one to her.  Berating myself, I knew it was really stupid for me to leave like that.

Brad parallel parked in front of a small shopping area.  He came around the car and opened my door taking my hand.  I took it to be polite, but really I was ready to go back.  But how could I after I ran after him to escape my problems.  He again opened the door for me into a small bistro.  I could see from my current vantage point there was a long counter leading from the door almost all the way to the back of the place.  Small wooden and metal tables were clusters on the opposite side.

We walked inside the quaint bistro decorated in a Mediterranean style even though it appeared based on the displays the food was mostly American.  Faint music played in the background to add to the earthy feel of the place.  We ordered and found an open table.  The chivalrous Brad paid for our meals, and I was grateful for not having to make an excuse for my missing wallet. I looked around and found the place was pretty crowded.

While we waited for our food I decided to try to take control of our conversation, therefore heading off any questions like my age or occupation.

“So why’d you decide to become a doctor?” I asked.

He nearly flushed, maybe embarrassed by his answer to come.  I wondered how I could possibly make him nervous. “My father is a doctor,” he began.  “And well, we’re not rich.  You saw my car.”

I try not to judge people by their possessions. Brad drove a Honda Accord that was a few years old.  It was more than what I had.  It was a really nice car, but it wasn’t the BMW Luke had either. Clearly his father was in the profession for the love of it and not the monetary gain.  That was admirable.  “My father devotes a lot of his time at free clinics and such.  He also has a full time practice in order to take care of our family,” he said.  I didn’t ask any questions yet and just let him speak.

“I’d like to make a difference too,” he said.  “Once I finish medical school and my residency, I plan to join the Peace Corps for a couple of years.”

“Wow,” I said in pure fascination.  I hadn’t expected an answer like that. I was left to ponder that when he got up.  He headed to pick up our food when our number was called.  A voice in my head I didn’t recognize spoke to me.  ‘He’s ripe for the taking.’  I didn’t like the tone of it and tried to ignore the urge to listen.  I didn’t have time to wonder where that thought came from.

When he returned we talked more about his residency and I asked questions about the craziest thing he’d seen in the emergency room.  That had been a fantastical story of a man impaling himself with a tree branch and how he came into the emergency room actually talking with leaves sprouting from his shoulder.

Brad was an easy going likable guy.  The kind of guy you could marry.  But I was still in high school and had a boyfriend so for obvious reason I treaded carefully.  ‘His soul is yours for the taking.  Kiss him.”  I almost said no out loud to the voice in my mind.  Instead, I looked around searching the faces in the crowd.  I couldn’t feel the succubus awake, so who was speaking to me in my head.

“Everything ok?” Brad asked.

I turned my attention back to him. “Yeah,” I said.  I looked down at my empty plate trying to hide my expression.  Something wasn’t right.  I wasn’t sure how it was happening, but someone was communicating to me in my head.  Could it have been Brad?  My first guess was no.  The voice was telling me to hurt him.  But maybe it was a decoy so I would feel safer with him.

“Ready to go,” he said.

I looked up at him searching his eyes.  Maybe I could see the truth in them.  When all I saw was the honest guy he’d seemed to be, I nodded trying to understand what was going on.

Leaving the bistro, I hoped he would take me home.  As much as I didn’t want to face Luke, I needed to tell him about last night and today.  Between him and Flynn, maybe we could come up with some answers.

But when he didn’t take me to the car I got panicky.  ‘Go,’ the voice commanded in my head.  Compelled to, I nodded in agreement.  Brad didn’t see.

Holding my hand he gently, he pulled me towards the side of the building.  When he felt my brief resistance he said, “I want to show you something,” he said.

I felt the smile return to my lips.  It would be so easy to kiss and corrupt Brad.  He was mine for the taking.  I shook the thought away trying to gain control back on my actions.

In passing I thought I should make excuses to have Brad take me back.  If Brad was the purely sweet guy his actions claim him to be, I thought maybe I owed him just this bit more time.  If he turned out to be some sort of killer or the one taking all the missing girls, I could always give him my kiss of death.

Silently, I hoped if needed, the kiss would be enough to save my life.  So I allowed him to guide me around the side of the retail block.  We followed wooden stairs right down to the beach.  My shoes sunk into the sand as we made our way to the middle, halfway between the stairs and the water.

“I like to think of this as my little slice of heaven,” he said.

‘You could bring him your version of his slice of hell,’ the commander of my mind insisted.  I nodded receiving my instructions.  I looked at his mouth knowing one kiss and he’d be mine. The thoughts were echoes that seemed to meld in back of my mind.  I continued to stare at his mouth.

Then I was looking at Brad trying to remember just what I’d been thinking about.  One thing was clear is that he was really adorable.  It would be so easy to kiss him.  I thought about Luke briefly, but really it was his fault I was here.  Didn’t I deserve a little pay back?

It was quiet here.  I looked down the beach to both sides of me as waves crashed to the shore.  We were alone for as far as I could tell.  Brad let go of my hand and kneeled down digging his hands into the sand.  I walked for a brief minute before I too knelt and asked him what he was up to.

“Looking for treasure,” he said looking at me with warm eyes.  Seeing him then, I really had a hard time believing he wasn’t anything more than a genuinely good guy.

‘Such a pure soul would be worth much.’  The words died in my conscious mind after the last syllable.

“I see,” I said smiling at him.  I sat then looking out on the surf.  The sun had not yet descended but it was making its way across the sky.  As Brad continued to dig like a small child with dreams of pirate treasure, I thought how nice it would feel to be with such a kind person.  So I was a couple years younger than Brad.  I felt certain that I should at least give him a chance.  A kiss couldn’t hurt anyone.

That thought made me shake my head.  What the hell.  I wasn’t interested in Brad.  How could I be thinking that way?  I wanted Luke and I wished he were here with me and not Brad.  Nothing against Brad, but my prepossessing heart was for Luke and it was breaking.  I fought against the tears because I wouldn’t cry.  It was obvious why he would want Adelina over me.  She better looking not to mention she was human, therefore better for him anyway.  She was probably ready for things I wasn’t.  I had every reason to want him to be happy because I loved him.  But love can be selfish and I’m sorry but if happiness was with her, I wanted him mad as hell.

Brad must have hit success because he eyes twinkled devilishly when I turned my gaze back from the ocean to him.  He held something out to me and I took it.  I knew what it was and ran my fingers across the smooth inside surface and across the rough top ridges.  It was a perfect palm sized sea shell.

“This is beautiful,” I said looking at it with wistful eyes.

Catching my eye he said, “Not quite as beautiful as you.”

‘Now,’ the voice said.  I began to lean in on automatic pilot.  Brad’s hand touched my hand that was griping the sand.  It slid up my arm with bits of the rough grains scratching the surface of my skin.  It was a slight pain, but enough it seemed to wake me from an open eyed dream.  But my brain didn’t process what’d happened in the proceeding minutes.

How had we gotten so close?  Looking away, I broke eye contact.  What lay before mw was the vast ocean.  Even though I was a good distance away, I felt like I was drowning.  Why was there a part of me wanting to kiss him?  Yet the other part was afraid he’d do just that.  I couldn’t allow that to happen.  Heaven knew that I didn’t want to hurt him.  I’d led him on.  I shouldn’t be here.  There could never be me and Brad for more than one reason.  One of the biggest was because I couldn’t tell him to wait for me.  Then tell him why, which would be because I wouldn’t be legal for a little more than a year.

The look in his face was quizzical.  I leaned back and he seemed to get the message.  He didn’t kiss me.  ‘Kiss him,’ the voice yelled in my head.

My head snapped up.  I felt the pull to wrap myself in Brad’s arms.  Something was definitely wrong.  The voice.  I hadn’t to remember the voice.  Through clenched teeth I said, “Can you take me home.”

The pleading in my tone struck him.  With defeated smile he stood and held his hand out to me.  I took it, letting him help me to my feet.  We walked back in silence to his car.  Rubbing the soft underside, I held on to that shell.  I grip it like it was the only thing that kept me on this side of reality.

He took me back home without further comment.  He parked in front of the house and didn’t turn off the car.  Obviously, Brad wasn’t the pushover I thought him to be.  Shyly, I looked at him hoping to continue to avoid physical contact other than the hand holding.  “Thanks, I had a nice time,” I said because I had.

He smiled and said, “Me too.” His words had been a bit hollower than I imagined.  What did I expect?  Then he added, “Well, maybe I’ll see you around.”

I smiled back at him knowing he’d figured out that I wasn’t interested.  The other possibility was he’d finally noticed how young I was.  But I didn’t ask him.  I simply said, “You will do great things.”  The words expressed not only that he would be make this world a better place one day but that I also understood this would be the last time I’d see him.

I opened the car door and stood to watch Brad drive off.  I wouldn’t be honest if I said I wasn’t disappointed.  He was a great guy and I wished maybe that timing would have been different and I could have been that great girl for him.

After his car drifted off onto the main road, I moved from the spot I’d taken root in.  So many things were going on.  I needed to find Flynn.  Avoiding Luke was on my priority list.  As much as I needed to talk to him too, I wasn’t ready for that yet.  However, I needed to tell someone about the voice before I forgot again.

Moving away from the front door, I walked towards the side of the house. Over the pristine lawn, I strode towards the back of the house. Once I was in the back, I paused to view the deck.  Thankfully it stood empty.  My eyes moved to a sand hill just passed the deck.  On the high dune overlooking the beach where football was still being played, a lone figure sat.

Taking a deep breath I moved over to the lone wolf.  He wasn’t an ally.  But certainly he would be impartial.  I sat next to Tom and he looked up at me.

“Here’s trouble,” he said.

Shocked those would be the first words he said to me, I said, "What's that suppose to mean?"  He didn’t even know me to imply such a thing.

He laughed.  It was a husky laugh that rolled in his chest like a growl.  I was surprised such a sound would come from a boy like him.  He had such an innocent look that made me decide it was a mask he hid behind.  Tom had secrets I was sure, but right now I needed to know just what happened after I left. “Well I suppose you wouldn’t know because you weren’t here,” he said.

“Tell me,” I said with a bit of desperation.

“The way I heard the story was that Adeline kissed your boyfriend.  You saw them and took off with some other guy,” he said.

I wanted to argue that point, but I guess I did run off.  I wasn’t going to explain myself to him either, at least not at this point.

“I heard it was with the doctor,” he said and eyed me careful as if I would show some reaction.  I didn’t because I could barely breathe.

“Your jilted boyfriend,” he continued.

"His name is Luke," I interjected.

“Ok, Luke followed you when you ran.  He came back pissed and let Adelina know just how he felt about her,” he said then paused for dramatic effect as if I should comment at this point.  I didn’t.

“Tony tried to calm his sister who at this point was crying and shouting back at him.  She doesn’t take rejection well."  Tony was the twins’ brother.  I should have noticed the resemblance.

"Ok, nasty things were said between both of them and somehow your name finally surface.  Tony being protective of his sister, clued into who you were.  Understanding that you were Luke’s girlfriend; he decided to chime in about hitting on you earlier today.”  Tom just looked at me.  He’d caught the tail end of our conversation.  “Then for the big reveal, Tony added how you made no mention of a boyfriend.”

Now I wanted to comment, but instead I put my hands on my head like I had a headache.  I couldn't believe all this went on.  I hadn’t led anybody on, had I?  Yet somehow I felt as though everyone would think this was somehow my fault.  I could tell Tom felt that way just based on how he told the story.  I was certain that would be the consensus amongst the guest.

I wouldn’t have believed Tom, the boy who acted like he wasn't aware of anything besides whatever was going on in his head, was surprisingly full of information.”  Tony then added that he’d be happy to wipe your tears once you returned amongst other things. At this point Luke took a swing at Tony.  The punch connected before Flynn, I think that his name, stepped in between.  Tony was down on the ground when Luke took off looking for you, I presume.  After Flynn helped Tony up, he sent the Luca's packing much to the dismay of Adriana." he said in a long string of words.

My vision clouded as the threat of tears returned to my eyes.  I held them at bay.  There were no words for what I just heard.  I searched the beach in the dying sunlight at playing figures tossing a football around and didn't find either Luke or Flynn.

"I'll give you some advice," he said.

After just listening to him, I wasn’t sure I wanted advice from him. "What," I said flatly not taking my eyes from the sand. I didn't want to see the judgment in his eye that I heard in his voice.

"Adelina is a spoil rotten.  Luke seems like a good guy.  Be honest with him about your feelings and don't string him along."

"I'm not," I said defensively. "I wasn’t trying to get with Tony.  I didn’t ask Brad over.  So what the hell was I suppose to do when I saw him kissing her." I wasn't sure why I was sitting here asking advice from a guy who looked like he had more problems than I did.

"If you trusted him, you would have waited for an explanation."

Idly, I began drawing pictures in the sand.  He was right.  I should have trusted him enough to ask the question.  I knew Luke wasn’t the type to do such a thing.  If it had been Flynn, then that would have been a different story.  But hindsight is twenty twenty.  I had been hurt by my own insecurities.  “If it had been your girlfriend kissed by another guy, would you have waited for an explanation,” I said throwing it back in his face.

“If I’d trusted her and love her, yes,” he said matter-of-factly.

Thinking back, Luke hadn’t handle Paul kissing me very well either.  But he hadn’t run away.  He’d held in his anger that exploded out after he drank himself to a stupor.  I looked up feeling Tom look at me.  His mouth opened and he said, "Your boyfriend’s back.”

Squarely, I stared at Tom for the first time.  His jaw was set as he returned my gaze.  He wasn’t a pretty boy but he was certainly cute.  I narrowed my eyes because what he said was weird. "How do you know that?" I asked.

He stood and said absently, "I heard his car." he said then added, “I should go.”

I didn't hear a car and said, “Why,” not really knowing why I wanted to know.

"Because even though you’re really cute, you're not worth the trouble," he replied before walking off not giving me a chance to debate his words.

What he’d said was like a slap I really needed.  I watched him head to the beach where the other guys were playing.  I didn't turn back to see if Luke really would come.  Rather I sat looking out at the fading sun.  Something about how definitively Tom spoke made me believe Luke would find me soon. Terror rocked through my body.  What was I going to say?  Our relationship the last few days had been rocky at best.  Could it survive the trouble I seemed to bring wherever I went these days?

I didn't wait long. The spot Tom had vacated was soon filled.  I knew it was Luke without needing to look.  I knew his movement and his smell.  The air filled with that clean soapy smell.  He didn't speak and neither did I. What was there to say?  I tried to decide if I should ask what happened or apologize for my part in this first.  Saying sorry had become second nature for me.  Our banter began with him saying "You left."  He said it so flatly it would seem that everyone really did believe this was my fault included him.

I countered with, "You kissed her." thus we began our back in forth much like a tennis match.  Sometimes he served and then sometimes I served.  Our conversation was made up of a string of short sentences straight to the point.

"Much like you kissed Paul."

"I reacted much like you did," I said remembering him drawing conclusions and getting drunk.

"I didn't jump in the car with Nina like you did with Doctor Brad ," he said snarling out Brad’s name.

"He's not a doctor yet. And besides I'd sent him away until I caught you kissing the enemy.”

"She kissed me not the other way around," he said angrily and I didn’t think all was directed at me.

"It didn't look that way," I said.

"How would you know you left so fast?"

"You wanted me to watch and then fight her or something?" I asked.

"No, trust like you said you did would have been good and fighting would have at least showed you cared.”

"I did trust you," I said using the past tense.  “As far as fighting it didn't do Nina any good.”

Ignoring my last comment he asked, "Are you interested in any of these guys?"  He didn't have to elaborate on which guys he's referring to.

"Nothing happen between me and Brad," I said getting to the obvious point.

He answered my unspoken question next. “I only dated Adelina twice for Flynn so he could go out with her sister," he said.

That made me happy I have to admit so I answered his question next.  "I was never interested in Brad or Tony," I said.  I did find Brad an interesting guy but he was too old for me.  And truly the kind of interest I felt for Brad was the kind of interest anyone might admit about someone unattainable.  Sometimes you can admire the qualities in others they have that you would hope to find in someone for you.

"I'm not interested in Adelina." He added flatly.

I searched his eyes while he searched mine.  A heat much like an inferno blasted through me.  It was so intense I expected him to be thrown backwards by the explosion.  He began to lean in and I still had my wits about me. "We can't," I said suddenly breathless.

His hand cupped my face as he drew me near. "We can," he said.  And like that our fight had ended.  When our mouths met I found myself falling as the succubus took control.

Chapter Twenty Nine

amorous (adj.) showing love, particularly sexual

Time surrendered to no one and I had no idea how much time past or what happened. But none of that mattered except that our connection had been broken.  I looked up in the last of the fading light to see Flynn standing over us. I felt the sand all around me and was slightly disoriented.

“Can’t you both take it upstairs?” Flynn said.

Luke held a hand to block the light that bounced off the rolling water and said to him, “What do you want?”

“Need your help with starting the bonfire,” Flynn said through narrowed eyes.

Luke looked back at me.  As much as I wanted to kiss him again, Flynn obviously wasn’t going to leave us alone right now.  It seemed like there was something I needed to tell them both, but I couldn’t remember.  “It’s fine.  Flynn can’t help being jealous of our amorous feelings for each other,” I laughed.  Flynn rolled his eyes.  “I need to go inside for a minute anyway,” I added.

He leaned over and kissed me again before helping me to my feet.  Too bad it had been a quick one.  They headed down closer to the water and I headed inside.  I wanted to find a place of solitude where I could sit and think about everything.  I needed to get the succubus under control.  I really needed to talk to Flynn and Luke about something.  Maybe if I was alone I could remember what it was that I needed to share.  What I did know was that I hadn’t been wearing the special balm, David had given me.  Why did it appear Luke was immune to my demon?  Why did I lose time with Luke?  I had no idea how long we’d been kissing.  I did know that I had to straighten my clothes when I’d gotten up.

I scooted quickly past the kitchen, dining, and family room.  I took the alone time to explore a little before Luke came for me.  The house was huge and had a couple of hallways that led not just straight but had a few turns.  Most of the doors were closed.  I’d opened a few to discover a pantry, bathroom, coat room, and an unoccupied office.   The next door I opened led into a grand library.

Stepping inside, the room had to be two stories tall equipped with a ladder that slid down the wall of book cases.  There was an antique desk in the corner turned at an angle to give the person behind it a view of the whole room.  In the middle there were huge leather chairs that looked so inviting.  Closing the door behind me, I realized just how tired I was despite my nap earlier.  Releasing my entire pint up energy I fell into the chair with a thud.

Curling my legs under me, I reached for the small table that separate the chair I was in with the chair on my right.  On the table was a stack of books.  Curiously, I appraised the first book’s bindings I surveyed it.  I didn’t think I could have been more surprised by the titles that graced each book I touched.

Why would Luke’s father have books like, ‘Witches, Warlocks and Wizards’, ‘Myths and Legends Surrounding Vampires’, ‘Everything You wanted to know about Nephilim’, ‘How to Survive a Succubus Kiss’, ‘How to Summon a Demon’, and a few other titles that dealt with Fallen Angels and Banshees.

Each book was larger than your average text book.  Additionally, each was artfully leather bound.  The leather of each varied in color from dark red, rich brown or midnight black.  The text on the spines of the book was either embossed in gold or silver. When I picked up the first book I wasn’t surprised by the heaviness of it.

I sat back with the spell caster book and opened it touching the first page of parchment that despite the look of the book was written in type face.  No author was listed but somehow it didn’t seem odd.  There was a table of contents, but I skimmed past it turning several pages until I landed on one of interest to me.

Wiccans – Humans who study witchcraft as a form of religion.

Witches – Humans women born of some magic who must

use words and objects to cast spells.

Warlocks – Human males much like witches born of magic.

Wizards – Demons with the power to cast magic from thought.

I wasn’t sure if I was a believer in the author’s hierarchy, but it was interesting.  However after skimming a few more pages, I laid the book down instead on the table in front of the chair so I could move to the next book.

This book was about Vampires.  I was a bit more interested in this book.  I wasn’t quite sure of their existence which seems odd because I existed.  Vampires were certainly a lot like a succubi if it was true they survived on human blood.  Some may consider human blood the life force of a person.  Succubus and Incubus like my mom and Flynn survived on the invisible human life force.  That got me thinking, did they steal the human spirit. But I pushed that thought aside.  It was seriously creepy.

Much like the book on spell casters, this book boasted no author and despite its mysterious leather bound cover and parchment paper this book too was type faced.   I pushed past the first chapter on the history of vampires.  In other circumstances, I may have spent the time to read that chapter, but I was anxious to push through.  I knew there was another book I really wanted to see more.  Why I didn’t just pull that book first could be because I was scared.  But I also wanted to see the validity of the others to get a sense if these books were fictional or not.

This book was approached differently than the first I’d opened.  So I was left with wondering if the authors were different.

Myth or Legend: Vampires can only hunt and exist in darkness?

Reason would say that if vampires were daywalkers the human

population would be greatly reduced.

Myth or Legend: Vampires can only enter a human home with

permission?

Reason would say if vampires were night creatures and human

are tucked away in their homes alone at night, this legend would

be protection for humans in their vulnerable sleep.

There were other myths and legends.  I briefly glanced at talked about garlic and running water.  But I found again that I wasn’t really excited about reading this book either.  I did follow the author’s logic and quite enjoyed they way the information was presented in a thought provoking way.  I set the book on the top of the spell caster book in front of me.

The next book I opened was titled Nephilim.  There was writing I didn’t understand below the name in symbols.  I wasn’t really familiar with the term Nephilim so I opened the book expecting much the same type face as the other two books.  I stopped when I saw that the book was hand written on parchment.  The script was elegant and bold.  The first sentence read:

Nephilim are the offspring of an angel and human woman.

I snapped the book closed.  For whatever reason I couldn’t look past the book and maybe because it was hand written it was more fact than fiction.  I hastily put the book down on the finished pile in front of me.  If there was time I might pull it back out.  I dusted my hands off as if I’d touched something awful.  I wasn’t a religious person but something in those pages bothered me without me even reading it.

I stopped putting it off and picked up the next book.  I yawned deeply, feeling just how tired I was.  I sat the book in my lap after I repositioned myself in the big leather chair.  I lovingly touched the cover tracing the name succubus.  I took more time and care with this book.  I was happy to discover that this book was not hand written.  However like the others, no author was listed.  Later, when I had a chance I would look to see if these books were one of a kind.

If I thought this book was going to be a history lesson I was sadly mistaken.  But then I should have understood from the title.  I read almost from the beginning digesting each word.  But the book came from the perspective of a potential victim and not from that of a succubus.  The title should have clued me into that.   It spoke of the beauty and allure of the demon comparing it to the compulsion of a vampire.  It spoke about quickly breaking a kiss and never sleeping with one.  It talked about the after effects if you didn’t die from their attack, but nothing in the book was of any use for me.  I’d hoped that maybe I might find some bit of knowledge that would open my eyes.  But really there had been zero to help my plight.  I didn’t read the entire book.  After several pages it had been clear there was no point.  I set the book down.

I didn’t pick up anymore books.  I leaned back in the chair slumping in its comforts.  I closed my eyes to think why such strange books would be in Luke’s house.  Was he researching me or maybe his father was? I mean Luke hadn’t been in this house much longer than I had recently, yet these books were sitting by this chair.  Luke’s father was a pastor of a large church and it seemed sacrilegious for him to be reading them.

Yawning, I found myself drifting on a calming sea of sleep.  A part of me wanted to open my eyes and explore the library.  I shouldn’t have given up so easily.  If these books existed surely there may be others in the many shelves of book relating to succubus.  But it was too late. I knew I was asleep when I heard the faint echo of my name.  I think I shook my head because it felt like I should follow the voice to the present.

Opening my eyes I found myself in a dense gray mist.  I could barely see my hands in front of me.  My bare feet touched the cool earth as I stumbled forward not sure of my direction.  When I heard my name again I cried out for Sebastian because voice had called out for Kayla.  No one else called me that.  In fact no one called me either Kayla or McKayla so it had to be Sebastian right?  But It didn’t sound like him.  Even though the voice was pleasant and inviting, the voice was all wrong.  It tried to use a soothing tone.  Then I remembered.  The voice.

Running now, I felt arms around me and I was lifted off my feet.  I cried out No soundlessly as nothing escaped my throat.  I wanted to thrash and fight as I glided through the mist in invisible arms.  The voice although further away grew stronger and more insistent.  Before I could reason that I should tell Flynn or Luke about this something clicked in my brain.

I found now that I wanted to run to the voice.  I was sure I was headed up a mountain even though I still couldn’t see.  The voice gave chase in strength as it grew fainter in the distant.  The mist parted when we reached the top.  Whoever held me turned a bit and I had a view below through the haze that had clouded my vision before.  I was high above the earth below like I had a bird’s eye view or a view from an airplane on a cloudless day.

It turned me forward again and I saw with clarity it was Luke’s house.  Not the house in the Hamptons, but the home he and his mother shared.  We drifted past and through the door like ghost.  Once inside I found myself instantly in his room.  He was laying me down on the bed with that angelic look of his captured on his face.

Tenderness spread through me and I could do nothing else but reach up and touch him.  He leaned down in utter slow motion for the kiss I was compelled to receive.  I had a momentarily flash that this dream would turn into a nightmare. Where had the voice gone? I hadn’t heard anymore.  Frighten beyond belief I opened my eyes.

“Luke,” I said.

He kissed me briefly before laying on the bed next to me.  His strong arms wrapped around me in a warm embrace.

“Get some sleep, Mercy,” he said.

“But,” I said.  Gently, he turned my face back to his and kissed me again.

“Sleep,” he said.  Like a command my body obeyed without choice.  I slept.

Much later I woke or something woke me.  I think it was morning, but it didn’t matter.  I found myself tangled in Luke embrace with my hand frantically searching for the hem of his shirt, I knew what had woken me.  The succubus was in control.  Waking with her heat I found that maybe I too wanted what coming as much as she did.

She found her way underneath his shirt.  When her hands touched his bare skin and solid muscles, even I relished the feeling.  But fear gripped me as I realized her intentions.  ‘Do it,’ the voice said.

Luke’s eyes opened when her hands dipped lower than his stomach to the drawstrings of his pants.  He caught her hands and I couldn’t help but let escape a sigh of relief which sounded more like a wounded moan for hers.  She gave him a wicked smile as she pressed herself firmly against him until our bodies align like stars in perfect coordination.  She nipped at his lower lips and he released her hands.  She moved them to his face to pull him closer if that had been possible.

I felt all that she felt.  It was my body too but I was powerless to stop her.  Luke was smart and he had to know this wasn’t me.  But then again how much did he know about what Flynn and I were.  ‘Stop thinking,’ the voice dictated.  The kiss was passion with everything heighten in between.  His eagerness was obvious.  I felt it pressed to my lower body giving me understanding just how amorous he was feeling.  I wanted to flush but my blush turned more to heat in the hands of the succubus.

The voice wasn’t affecting my reactions this time.  Was it controlling Luke or directing my demon?  But I was sure my succubus needed no encouragement to act in the manner in which was.

Touching lightly at first, his hands dipped under my shirt.  His fingers were on my back and tingles of delight ran oddly through my belly.  I could feel it as real as if I was in control of my actions.  They traced the contours of my back before descending lower to my hips.  I knew if he didn’t stop we would reach the point of no return.  My hands or her hands were frantically in his hair as she arched forward prompting him to have a firm grip on my bottom as a sound escaped his own mouth.

“Mercy McKayla,” I cried out in an inaudible voice in my head in a roar.  It was strong and loud and I found myself being propelled back in the driver’s seat.  As I took control I made evasive maneuvers and rolled myself away which resulted in me landing my ass on the floor.  Don’t get me wrong, at this point I wasn’t sure I didn’t want to be with Luke that way.  But no matter what I felt, with no sure control over what was inside me, I could risk his life over sex.

“Mercy, are you ok?” Luke said from his position leaning over the bed looking at me on the floor.

I couldn’t quite answer because I was breathless and flushed all over from his touch.  Fear shown in my eyes I was sure.  I still wanted him.  Crab walking backwards from him, I scrambled to my feet.  I ran to the bathroom and shut the door locking it behind me.  Inside I was able to tell I was still in the Hampton’s.  In fact I’d showered in here earlier unless all the bathrooms were decorated the same.  So this was the room he’d claimed to belong to him.  Evidently, that part of the dream was true in a way.  I sat with my back to the door trying to figure out how much of this had been a dream.  I wasn’t for sure and couldn’t trust myself.

He didn’t call to me but I heard him on the other side of the door.  Maybe it was the slight creek of his weight that was an indication if I could trust my hearing over the pounding in my heart.  I didn’t blame him.  But his silence led me to believe if it wasn’t a dream he was sorry.

For the first time, I now believed maybe my mother was right.  I should have stayed the course and left boys alone.  I had to be hurt him at least emotionally because I was hurting myself.

I opened my mouth to speak and tell him it was my fault but fear closed it.  If he knew I had so little control over the demon in my body would he feel safe to continue to stay with me?  So I closed my mouth and again fought tears I wouldn’t let come.  Drawing my knees to my chest, I covered my head in my hands and pressed them to my knees.

Chapter Thirty

compelling (adj.) forceful, demanding attention

A while later a knock came on the door at my back.  I was still sitting in a pool of myself loathing when Flynn voice broke the silence in the room.

“Merce, open the door.”

I turned and put my hand against the door frame.  Where had Luke gone?  I hadn’t heard him leave.  Did I imagine him next to me on the door?  Was I losing my mind?

“Come on, open up?” he said.

Still I made no move to open it.  I wasn’t ready yet to face my demons.  The door knob turned and I moved sliding across the floor as he opened it inward.  Flynn had a way about him which always conflicted with his outward personality.  He knelt down and scooped me in his arms giving me comfort and understanding I didn’t feel I deserve.

“What’s going on?” he asked.

I let him hold me but I didn’t return the move.  I was like Playdough in his hands.   “Luke went to get Maggie,” he said.  “She is going to ride back with us since Brent will be in the hospital a few more days.”

I said nothing.  I wasn’t ready to admit what I’d almost done.  I hadn’t yet admitted it to myself.

“Are you and Luke fighting again?” he asked. “I offered to pick her up but he insisted.  He had the same haunted expression you do.”

So it wasn’t all a dream and Luke was just as horrified as I was.  Yet he hadn’t stayed to talk to me.  He’d left which could only mean one thing.  He was going to break things off with me if his actions weren’t words enough.

I pulled away from Flynn realizing I couldn’t hold the tears any longer.  Standing, he set me on my feet.  I would excuse this transgression of tears.  I was losing the boy I maybe loved.  My heart breaking sure felt like I loved him, but it felt so different from what I felt for Paul.  Before now I was sure I loved him.  It didn’t matter, I would never have the chance to love Luke anymore.  I stood and went back in the room getting a few things from my bag.

Flynn followed me back in the room shadowing my movements.  After I had what I needed, I headed back to the bathroom shutting the door between us locking it this time.  Oh, I was sure he could get in if he wanted.  So I headed to the shower and turned it on hoping he would get the message.

When the knocking stopped, I assumed he did.  I showered and changed.  Dressed in the bedroom I found myself alone again.  I did the only thing I could.  I packed and left the room.  Downstairs, I ate a bagel out of a bagel left on the counter saying nothing and made myself scarce.  I found the library again and explored the bookcase until Flynn came for me to tell me it was time to go.  My own inner voice was yelling at me to tell him what had been happening.  Frozen, I didn’t speak.  Truth was I was ashamed.

Finding no more succubus titles or any other strange books like the ones I found last night, I exited the library.  I’d check the tables and they were still there so I was sure I hadn’t dreamed them.

The drive home was pretty quiet after Maggie gave us an update of Brent’s progress.  The doctors were pleased with his healing almost to the point of being impressed.  They were pretty sure he’d be released with his current progress in just a few more days.  Maggie had been holding a vigil by Brent’s side until now and fell asleep fast.  I had been afraid to sleep, but in the silence drifted off.

I woke to Luke’s gentle voice.  When my vision cleared I realized we were the only two left in the car.  More surveillance showed we were in front of my house.

“Mercy, I’m sorry,” he said.  There was a sadness in his voice.  I could hear the words he was about to say.

Sitting up in the backseat, a thunderous panic ran over me.  Were we about to break up?  “No, I’m the one that’s sorry and I understand,” I said in a feeble voice.

His face changed from sorry to one of confusion. “What do you mean you understand?” he asked.

I kept my eyes on him, even though I desperately wanted to look away. “I understand why you want to break up with me,” I said.

In seconds, he maneuvered his way in the back seat with me.  I’d been looking at him in the driver seat with me planted in behind the passage seat one moment and the next I was in his arms somewhere in the middle.

“I don’t want to break up with you,” he said. “And you have nothing to be sorry for.”

I heaved in a gulp of air in response to my need to hold back the wave of emotion.  Overlooking the obvious moral issues, I was concerned with the fact I most certainly would have killed him if we’d gone all the way.  “I could have killed you by losing control,” I said.

He stroked my hair calming me. “I have no one to blame but myself for nearly giving into temptation.  It felt like I woke from a dream and didn’t know it,” he said.

“So you’re really not breaking up with me,” I said.

He held me tighter, “No, I was sure you were going to break up with me for violating your trust,” he said.

I looked up at him and even though I was sure we both wanted to kiss, we refrained. “You should go inside,” he said.  “Your mother’s watching.”

I pulled back and surveyed the front of the house.  I didn’t see her.  Somewhere in the back of my head, it reminded me of the strange comment Tom had made letting me know Luke was coming when I hadn’t heard the car.  But I chucked this to my mom moving away from a window before I saw her.  “Do you want to come in?” I asked hopefully.  “There are some things I need to tell you about.  Like the voice I’ve been hearing in my head,” I said.

Alarm rang in his eyes.  “Voices,” he said in a rush.

“Yeah, it’s weird.” I began.

He looked up expectantly.  Then his face turned to stare at my house.  “Look, I’ll call you later.  You need to tell me everything.  In the meantime, don’t be alone, ok?” he said.

I nodded.  Again he looked at my house.  I couldn’t read his expression.  Then he looked back at me.  I was sure he wanted to stay but he said, “I should probably get home.”

I nodded and we got out of the car.  He carried my bag and held my hand in the other.  We walked like that to the door.  With my hand on the door knob he gave me a kiss just not the one I longed for.  He gave me the airbrush kiss.  Before he left, again he stared at me like there was more to say.  Instead he promised to call me later.

Inside, I headed up to my room dropping my bag on my bed before turning around to go back downstairs to the kitchen.  I’d heard my mom down there.  Maybe it was time to talk.  She was fussily banging around the kitchen as she always did when she was trying to prepare a meal.

“I’m home. I can make lunch,” I said.

She jumped as if she wasn’t expecting me.  But how could that be if Luke had seen her.

“I see you made your way inside.  Is he here too?” she asked, visibly not pleased with the idea.  She hadn’t yet looked back at me.

“Luke went home, so it’s just you and me,” I said.

She stood and turned around. “Mercy, I really don’t think it’s such a good idea for the two of you to be together,” she said.

A ball of anger churned in my chest, but I had to try really hard to control my emotions around her. “Mom, Luke and I are together so you’ll just have to deal with it.  You could help the situation by telling me how to protect him.”

“You’re the one that needs protecting Mercy,” she said.  Her blue blazed truths not yet told.

There were times like this one that I wanted to shout at my mother but out of respect I’d kept quiet.  I mentally counted to ten so the next words out of my mouth wouldn’t be disrespectful.  Somehow I held it together.  She wasn’t stupid.  Luke was human and I was the succubus.  I was the threat.

“Stop changing the subject and act like my mom.  I can’t compel you to tell me.  So be my protector and teach me what I need to know,” I said, vaguely holding my temper in check.

She looked at me with sympathy that confused me.  I expected anger not the expression she had on her face.  I looked away from her eyes and noticed she was dressed in her nurse scrubs.  She was going to work tonight.  I glanced at the oven clock to see it wasn’t yet noon.  Had she just gotten back from work or was she headed out?  Because we weren’t talking as much I didn’t know her schedule for this week.

“Mercy, there are things that I can’t yet explain.  You need to trust me and give me time.  It’s obvious you have the basics if you are dating,” she said.

I narrowed my eyes.  I wanted to tell her the only reason why I was dating was because Luke unbelievably understanding and hadn’t pushed me.  Yeah, we had a few close encounters but I was starting to believe the voice in my head may have something to do with at least some of my troubles.  Then there was the balm David gave me but based on her mood I didn’t want to bring him into our fight.  So I said something that in retrospect I may have kept to myself.  “Yeah, thanks to Flynn,” I said half-heartedly.

Her eyes grew wide. “What have you and Flynn been doing?  Isn’t Luke your boyfriend?” she asked.

I understood her implication and let her stew in it a bit more with my answer. “Luke is my boyfriend, but Flynn is my teacher,” I said sarcastically. “If you would teach me I wouldn’t need a substitute.”

“Mercy McKayla, I’m still your mother,” she said.  It had been quiet sometime since she used my middle name against me.

“Well then act like it,” I said.  This was not the daughter she was used to but ignoring and avoiding the topic wasn’t working.

She stepped away and began to continue mulling around the kitchen. “I know you deserve the truth,” she began. “But promises were made that I have to keep.  I need time Mercy, please give me that.”

She turned to me when she delivered the last sentence.  I saw the truth in her eye.  Her utter sincerity had me still my tongue.  I looked away when I saw her eyes glisten.  I wasn’t going to cry, so I hoped she wouldn’t either.  “Fine,” I said.  Then I did something I don’t think either of us expected.  I hugged her.   She placed one hand around me and we found a truce.

“There was another woman found dead this morning,” she said over my shoulder.

I let her go taking a step back. “What’s going on?” I asked because all of a sudden I thought I could read her like a book.  She knew more than what she let on.

“David and I are going to handle it but in the meantime, he wants us to stay at his house,” she said. “So I’ll drop you off there on my way to work.  Pack a few things to last you a couple of days.”

“Where was she found?” I asked fearing I knew the answer.

“South Hampton,” she said.  Her expression said everything.

I was stunned.  I didn’t bother to ask for answers.  It was clear she nothing more needed to be said.  Planning in my head, I would ask Luke or Flynn tonight.  David was much more of an open parent and most likely would have given Flynn more details.

Kicking my mom out of what I deemed my kitchen, I threw together a healthy lunch. Content that our relationship was in a better place, we ate making small talk about what she and David did on our trip.  We both left the subject of the missing women alone.  It was clear more so than ever wherever I was, so was the killer.

After eating I’d packed a bag which wasn’t hard because the essentials were already packed from our recent trip.  I just swapped out clothes.  With nostalgia, I looked around my room and knew it was unlikely I would be in it much longer.  David and my mom were getting married.  It was it was probable that once we made his house our temporary home, rationale would be given why there was no compelling reason for us to leave.

I lay on my bed and thought about all the things I resolved today with direct communication.  There was something to be said for that.  There was just one more person I had something I needed to resolve issues with.  So I plotted and made calls and found myself instead of Flynn’s front door in front of the restaurant Paul worked at where my mother dropped me off at my request.  Suitcase in hand I waited in the chilly air next to Paul’s car.  The timing was perfect and I knew he would walk out that door soon.

When he did, dressed in a brown Yogi bear vintage screen tee and jeans with spiky black hair as if he’d ruffled it moments before, I remembered all the reason why I loved him.

Chapter Thirty One

emollient (adj.) soothing

His expression was one of dismay but only after a few seconds he walked forward and stood in front of me.  I was leaning against the driver’s side door of his car with suitcase handle in my hand.  He took in my band shirt that boasted Paramore from a recent concert he, Maggie and I had gone to long before this mess had started.

“Are you running away?” Paul said.  His expression now was neutral.

“We’re going to talk and I need a ride?” I said.

He looked away then back at me.  I was still standing there and he almost seemed surprised as if he expected me to have disappeared. “Get in,” he said resolved he had no choice.

I began to roll my overnight bag around with me when he took my hand.  I looked up at him and he at me.  It had been the most physical contact we had in a while.  It shouldn’t have been as awkward as it felt.

“I’ll take that,” he said and I let go feeling silly because we were friends.  Why couldn’t we touch without it being weird?  I walked around the car trying to shrug it off.

He put my bag in the trunk while I got into his car. Moments later he was in the driver’s seat.  He didn’t put the key in the ignition though.  I knew then that the time for our talk had come.

“Merce,” he said. His voice was emollient.

I looked up to meet his gaze and took control.  I had rehearsed this in my head all afternoon and I wouldn’t let him steal my thunder.

“Hear me out,” I said. “You had your turn and now it’s mine.”

He closed his eyes then nodded and watched me.  The stage was set and I was almost afraid.  Paul was so special to me and I wasn’t sure how he would take what I had to say.

“I love you and you know that,” I said.  His look changed from resignation to confusion. But I didn’t let that deter me. “I think, no, I know you care but you think you want me because I have moved on from being the sad puppy dog pinning away after you.”

He opened his mouth to speak.  I silenced him with my finger and with the whoosh of air from my lungs. “Shh,” I said.

I continued before he could interject. “You need to let me go.  Luke is good for me and he accepts me for what I am,” I said.

“He knows?” he was able to ask and was clearly surprised.

I nodded, “Amber is a cute and sweet girl and human too.  She is everything you need and as your best friend everything I could wish for you.”

“But,” he said.

“But the truth is you don’t want me.  If you had, you wouldn’t have waited until someone else wanted me to make your move,” I said. He didn’t answer, so I was sure he was in silent agreement. “The truth is although you accept me as a friend, being with me was never really an option for you.”

He looked away.  So I continued. “Let me go Paul and let us be friends. I hate that I can’t talk to you anymore. So be happy for me and go back to your girlfriend,” I pleaded.  From a distance I could hear the whininess of my voice.

He leaned back in his seat and I’d finished my preplanned speech.  For the most part it had gone as I had practiced it in my head.  I thought back though making sure I’d hadn’t missed any points but he wasn’t arguing with me so I too leaned back in my seat as the car fell into silence.

I closed my eyes a second when the engine roared to life.  “Where am I taking you?” he said.

I opened my eyes only to close them again.  Although everything had gone according to plan a small part of me had wanted him to profess his undying love for me.  But he hadn’t.  He hadn’t really made any hard arguments against anything I said nor really fought to speak.

But in the end, I think I’d gotten what I wanted so I said, “To Flynn’s.”

He looked at me quizzically but said nothing and turned to maneuver the car out of the parking lot.

We started down the street when I changed my mind.  “You know what, just take me home,” I said.  I wasn’t ready to give up my solitude.  I had batted for three tonight and got all home runs.  But this last one here with Paul didn’t feel like a victory.

It wasn’t long before he pulled into my driveway.  I didn’t know what I expected.  In my room, I thought about our strange conversation a return of sorts to normality.  I’d filled him in on Brent and Maggie and he’d given the occasional noise that let me know he was listening but he didn’t contribute much to the conversation.  He’d simply dropped me off and waited until I’d gotten in the house to leave.  One could hope that he wouldn’t ignore me tomorrow at school.

Under my covers I remembered Luke asking me not to be alone.  It was too late now though.  I was somewhat happy he hadn’t called.  So I didn’t have to explain my transgression.  We needed to talk about everything that happened.  It was possible these events were tied to the missing girls.  My mom had clued in on that.  But instead, under my covers I dug in to the familiarity of the comforts of home.  I’d slept in different beds this past week and really just needed to be home.  I felt safe and slept here alone often enough.  Luke’s arms around me were something I did miss.

It took a while but I didn’t finally sleep. I made promises to myself that despite the creepy serial killer, my life would return to normal.  I was going to be happy.  I’d already planned what I would wear to school which included Luke’s letterman jacket.

The mist appeared again.  I’d journeyed alone this time to Luke’s house on top of the mountain before the voice and my name crashed in like thunder.  I obeyed the call.  I was headed to the voice again.  The pull was strong and it had only taken that one time for me to heed it.  I could see his house.  It was only a few more steps.

The blast of cold air hit me once I opened the front door.  Awake now, I was more shocked by my not remembering walking to my own front door than to the boy who stood on the other side of it.

“Luke,” I said. “What are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same,” he said. “You were supposed to be at Flynn’s.   When he called wondering if you were with me, I came over here.”

Don’t get me wrong I was happy to see him but I was still puzzled by my apparent sleep walking.  “I just wanted to sleep in my own bed tonight,” I said absently trying to figure out what just happened.  Had the thunderous voice I’d heard been Luke’s frantic knocking on my door.  But thinking back, the voice had been using my middle name and nickname like before.

“I was knocking a while and almost gave up.  You didn’t answer your phone either.  Can I come in?” he asked. I stepped away from the door letting him in.  Once he closed the door behind himself, I headed upstairs.

He followed me in my room while I searched for my phone.  I found it in my jeans only to realize it had no charge.  I couldn’t remember when the last time I’d charged it.  I dug out the charger from my bag and plugged it in.  Once I was finished with that task, I looked at him.  He had stood in my room watching me when I realized he’d never been upstairs in my room.

“I should go, but I don’t want to leave you here alone.  I can take you to Flynn’s,” he said.

My mom was working the third shift and wouldn’t make it home before school started.

The clock time read one in the morning.  I shook my head.  Instead, I slid in my bed feeling drossy with sleep. “It’s late, only a few hours before school. I’ll be fine.” I said with a yawn.

“I guess I could stay downstairs, because I’m not leaving you alone.  Will your mom freak out if she finds me here?” he asked.

I wanted to ask him how his mother felt about him being out the house this late but I was really tired.  It felt as though I hadn’t slept at all. “She won’t be home before we leave for school,” I said.

He went to turn for the door when I said, “Luke, I’m glad you’re here.”

He looked at me with a twinkle in his eye and moved to the door.

“Luke,” I said stopping him in his tracks before he made his way out.

“Yes,” he said softly.

“Don’t be silly, you can sleep in here with me,” I said.  I wasn’t one hundred percent sure it was the best idea, but I knew with his arms around me he could chase my bad dreams away.

“I’m not sure that’s a good idea,” he said.

“It may be the last time in a long time I’ll be able to wake in your arms. Please,” I begged.

I saw the resolve in his face when he gave into my request.  He took off his jacket and draped it over his letterman jacket on my chair.  Fully dressed he came under my covers and folded me in his arms.  Chilly from the night air, my skin erupted in goose bumps from his embrace but I didn’t let it bother me.

Closing my eyes and on a yawn, I said, “You know I was dreaming and the emollient voice was calling me.”

“Sleep Mercy, will talk about it in the morning,” he said yawning too.

But it seemed so important he should know.  The dream however began to fade in my head to the point I found myself vaguely I asked, “Does your mom know where you are?  But if he answered I didn’t hear it.

Chapter Thirty Two

esoteric (adj.) understood by only a select few

School zoomed by that week I barely even remember what happened as it went by.  Luke and I had made it through the night with no further incidents including nightmares or the succubus’s desires.  With all his gallant talk, he’d come prepared to stay the night with me.  But I knew he thought he’d be staying at Flynn’s.  On the drive to school, I filled in on all my musing on what been happening to me.  I glossed over the details with Brad giving him only highlights.  There wasn’t need to piss him off when things were in my favor.

He’d called Flynn last night sometime after I fell asleep to tell him where he was.  Needless to say, an unhappy Flynn had waited for us in the parking lot.

“Thanks to you too, I had to lie to my dad,” Flynn said.  “Maggie’s not thrilled with you either since I woke her in the middle of the night to devise a plan.”

“Thanks, Flynn,” I said with a half hearted smile.  I didn’t want to get either of them in trouble.  “I’m thankful you have such an esoteric view of me,” I teased him with my word of the day.

He wasn’t having any of it.  Luke laughed a bit until Flynn shot him a deadly look.  “I’m not in the habit of lying to my father.  And certainly not so the two of you could have a slumber party.”

Maggie walked over and I prepared myself to hear it from her too.  Instead she winked at me and held Brent’s hand.  I think they both thought that we were fooling around but I wasn’t going to get in to it with an audience.

I was right that Luke and I wouldn’t be able to share that experience anymore.  Even though my mom and David had been clueless about my security in Luke’s arms, I’d been told under no uncertain terms; that because of the nature of the killings of young woman I was to sleep at David’s from now on until things resolved.

Upon our arrival back from the Thanksgiving break, Flynn’s car was out of the shop.  Talking about spoiled, Flynn didn’t drive the car that had been fixed.  Rather, David traded it in for the latest model.  I hadn’t notice until he pointed out.  He was the proud owner of a magnetic black 370Z.  I had to admit it was a flashy car.  It wasn’t the luxury car that Luke drove, but it was the kind of fast car that girls swoon over.

To top things off, Flynn became my designated chaffer driving me to and fro school.  Riding with him was a holy difference experience than driving with Maggie.  She and I had a rhythm only gained by riding with her exclusively for the past two years.  We usually had cheerful conversation over latte’s she’d pick up on the ride to school.  Flynn on the other hand was not a happy camper in the morning and usually played hard rock with shrilling guitar solos that could wake the dead.  Apparently, that’s what he needed to start his day.  I, on the other hand, liked the volume of the music low and friendly conversation to start the day.  It would take a lot of getting used to.  Part of me wanted to ask Maggie to pick me up anyway, but it seemed selfish to have her drive by school in order to get me.  So I put up with Flynn’s morning moodiness for now hoping against hope we would move back home before the wedding.  But even I saw the writing on the wall.

In the grand home the McCallisters resided in, I had been given a room on the other side of the house opposite Flynn with our parents’ room between ours.  I guess I deserve that because I had kind of led my mother to believe that there might be something going on with Flynn and I to some extent.

When Friday night came, Flynn, Luke and I huddled in the den to watch movies.  No parties were happening at least none of the seniors were having one until Brent got back.  One of the other football players was planning to hold a welcome back party in Brent’s honor he came back.  The guy’s parents were going out of town next which meant he’d been chosen the designated party thrower.  Maggie was handling the other details like a super supportive girlfriend.  She hadn’t asked my help and I was grateful.  I knew next to nothing about throwing a party.

Maggie had been upbeat all week and didn’t seem worried a bit that Brent wouldn’t make a full recovery and be able live to play football another day.  Paul and Amber seemed to be back together.  She was happy again and they sat at our lunch table all week.  That made me happy.  It was contagious.  It felt good not to be the object of someone else’s despair.  The morning I woke with Luke, I’d frantically searched my room and had found the balm which I continued to use religiously.

“Are you sure you don’t want to go out to the movies,” Luke asked.  I think he wanted to be alone with me free of Flynn’s prying eyes.  Flynn out of all of us had been in a foul mood.  He and Amanda hadn’t gotten back together.  She and Nina had forged a tighter friendship despite the fact they’d fought at a party only two weeks ago.

I felt sorry for Flynn, I wasn’t sure why.  He’d been there for me so I would do the same for him.  When his cell phone rang, his face changed from grim to grin.  I strained to listen into the conversation and only heard his side.   That left me with a few affirmative noises and grunts before he told us he was headed out.  My mom and David were also absent.  They were working on the serial killer problem in the evenings when they both were not working.  We’d filled them in on the strange voice that plagued me.  They were working their supernatural contacts and following leads like super sleuths.  We weren’t allowed in on the fact gathering even though we’d all protested.  Instead they’d asked Flynn or Luke to be my bodyguard because everyone assumed that I was somehow involved as a potential victim.  It had taken all my mother’s pride to ask Luke for help but after she’d eaten humble pie, I’d let him accept.  Maybe I should be afraid for my life, but honestly the voice didn’t seem intent on hurting me.

Luke and I were alone all too quickly.  It felt like something in the air change.  The balm had calmed the succubus’s advances when we kissed.  I wasn’t sure I liked kissing him with it on.  It was somehow wrong.  I didn’t see the moon and star firework display any longer when our mouths met.  But the balm wasn’t a cure all.  It didn’t stop the human side of me craving his touch.

“We should go out and see a movie,” I said jumping off the couch.

He smiled at me. “You feel it too,” he said.

I nodded in agreement. He stood to his full height of six feet and I felt like a dwarf at my height. I looked up at him and he took me in his arms nuzzling my neck. “Are you afraid of me?” he asked wickedly.

Nodding again, I found my voice. “I’m more afraid of myself,” I said.

Our kissing was more natural without hesitation these days.  Putting on the balm that was a barrier of protection was automatic. But when his mouth met mine the planets aligned. I realized I didn’t have it on.  It was awake before I could stop her.  My eyes went dark I was sure.  My own tunnel vision opened like I was watching a movie.  Her eyes locked on his and before I knew we were laying on the couch.  Our kissing had become frantic with hands, hair and my touch tugging on his shirt.  It wasn’t long after that his shirt was off and so was mine and nothing stood between our upper bodies except my bra.  His hands were frenzied behind my back searching for the clasp when fate walked in.

“I wondered if you guys wanted to come along with,” Flynn said stopping in his tracks.  Luke who was raised slightly over me shifted and lay on me possessively shielding my bare skin from Flynn.

I didn’t yet have control and I watched Flynn’s eyes change as well.  So he hadn’t left.  But I was sure I heard the front door open, but obviously he’d come back.

“Are the two of you crazy?” Flynn yelled.  He moved forward and Luke shifted again given me room to roll over to my back.  Once turned, my bra gave a little and I realized Luke had indeed successfully unclasped it.

Luke stood when Flynn back out of the room.  With all the testosterone gone, the succubus relinquished control back to me.  I tugged my shirt on not bothering with the bra.  I even pulled Luke’s shirt on top because my shirt was a tight fit.  I opened the door to the den and bolted past both boys and headed to my room.

Again I thought back to my mother.  Why hadn’t I listened?  Over and over I kept losing control.  Being in a relationship was too dangerous.  Luke and I couldn’t keep our hands to ourselves half the time.  I couldn’t blame that on the succubus.  I imagine that a lot of my peers’ relationships were the same.  The only difference was me doing these things could have dire consequences.

I wasn’t sure it was embarrassment that had me fleeing the scene or if it was fear of my loss of control again.  But there you have it as I tore down the hall and up the stairs to my new room.  Safely inside, I shut the door.  I pull off both shirts then took my bra off to start putting it on again the regular way.  When my door opened halfway in the process, I cursed the fact that I didn’t lock it.  I covered myself with my arms and Luke turned around.  I finished and pulled back on my shirt and handed him his.

“We should go out?” he said.  He wasn’t angry.  He sounded just as frustrated as I was.

I nodded which I seemed to be doing a lot of lately. “Yes, we should.”

Avoiding touching each other, we headed back down the stairs.  Flynn gave me the evil eye.  Luke showed he still trusted me and tugged at my hand.  I hesitated in front of Flynn. I didn’t say anything except with my eyes.  It was an esoteric look.  I hoped he’d recognized the fear in them.

Chapter Thirty Three

carouse (v.) to party, celebrate

Wearing the balm was more than just important to me.  I wore it even when I went to sleep.  I wore it so much I was nearing the end of it and would need to ask David for another.  I wasn’t certain he had more, but somehow I didn’t think he would have given me his only one.

Despite the fact the serial killer hadn’t been found, things were returning back to normal.  Brent had come back to school the following week and the whole gang was together.  Flynn however was still without a girlfriend.  I continued to worry about him.  On the way to school the following Friday, I finally had the nerve to ask him about it.

Causally, I brought up the subject, “Flynn,” I said a little loudly over the bellow of the guitar melody that was no less than hard core.  He turned down the sound system which my ears were eternally grateful for and I asked the question.  “How are you surviving?” I asked.

He turned to me searching my face then turned back to the road. “What do you mean?” he asked truly not understanding my question.

“The incubus needs,” I said not expounding. I didn’t think he needed further clarification.

“Oh,” he said then paused. “Why are you donating, again?”

Rolling my eyes, I said, “I worry about you.” It was true.  I wasn’t sure I wanted him to know but I’d already said it.

“You still didn’t answer my question?” he said.

Puzzled, I shot back. “What question?”

“Are you donating?” he said again not looking at me but kept focused on the road.

“Don’t play games Flynn,” I said.

“I wasn’t,” he said seriously.

I thought for a moment.  “Things didn’t go well the last time,” I said.  But honestly if Flynn was really in need, would I?  Then I added, “If you need it and have no other options,” I said sure of my answer.

“I’m fine Mercy, but I’ll keep that under advisement now that you are getting regular installments from Luke,” he said.

“I am not,” I said.

He laughed.  “You sure could have fooled me,” he said. “I didn’t know you took the next step in your relationship.”

I blushed not really wanting to talk about that but somehow I needed to explain. “We didn’t.  I lost control.”

He seemed thoughtful for a second.  I couldn’t read his expression.  “You know how dangerous that is if you don’t know how to control your power,” he said.

I’d never thought of it as power but more of a curse.  “Like I said, I lost control.  And honestly I really think I need your help Flynn,” I said.  I hadn’t expected the conversation to take this direction but now that it had I would press forward.

“You really need to talk to your mother,” he said.

I didn’t have to think about that answer. “I already did.  She said that she needed more time, but eventually she would tell me what I need to know.”  I didn’t tell him about the haunted look in her eyes or how I just understood I needed to wait on her timing.

“So you should wait,” he said.

Pulling into the school parking lot, I saw Luke near his car talking to Jay.  Kathy was noticeable absent.  I don’t think I ever saw her away from Jay outside of class.

“Flynn that wasn’t the first time I lost control and you know it,” I said and told him about the few times he wasn’t privy to.

He seemed grim and pulled into an open slot a couple cars away from Luke.  There had been an open spot next to Luke but I guess he wanted to give us a few more minutes to discuss the topic.

“Did you hear the voice that the first time you lost control?” he asked.

I hadn’t expected him to focus on that part of the story, so I hesitated to change my thoughts.  I gave him a quick rundown of my dreams about Luke’s house.  I also told him the full story about what happened on my impromptu date with Brad.  In a way I felt bad I hadn’t told Luke everything about that.  But someone needed to know.  Until Flynn had really questioned me now about it I hadn’t really given it a second thought.

Luke started walking to the car.  Flynn’s expression changed.  “We’ll talk about it tonight.  I have to stay after school.  So see if Luke or Maggie can give you a ride home,” he said then added, “Don’t be alone with Luke.”

I didn’t think he meant that I should be afraid of Luke but more that we were dangerous together.  I couldn’t disagree.  When I’d seen him again this past Saturday and Sunday but we’d hung out with Flynn and other seniors bowling on Saturday.  We went over Jay’s house Sunday.  Neither of us had discussed it, but we both understood the need for us not to be alone together.

I got out the Flynn’s car and Luke was there to take me in his warm hug.  His face was a bit red from the cold and his hand was freezing as well but with him none of it seemed to matter.  We walked in the school hand in hand.

The school day trotted by and thankfully nothing special happened.  At lunch Maggie and I made plans for the pre-evening events.  Tonight was Brent’s welcome back party.  At Flynn’s request, I ended up riding home with Maggie because she wanted us to get ready together.  We were chatting away but my head hadn’t really been focused on the conversation.

“Brent is doing so well,” she said.  I recognized that I hadn’t been paying attention to what she’d been saying.  So I tried not to give her any clue that suggested I hadn’t.

Maggie knew me all too well.  “You weren’t listening to me,” she said.

“I am, Brent’s doing maybe even great,” I said regurgitating her meaning in different words.

“Fine,” she said.  “On another note, Amber is really happy.” I’d noticed that too.  Paul hadn’t been avoiding me but our conversations were minimal at best when they happened at all.  It was fine I tried to tell myself.  I was sure time would heal the wounds.  He’d put on his best face for Amber, but I could tell he was troubled.  I couldn’t afford to think about it.  I was working my own desperate need to enjoy happiness.

“Yeah, she looks super,” I said, maybe a bit too enthusiastically.  I didn’t want to continue down this line of conversation.

“Well, I guess everything worked out for the best,” she said.  Something in her tone made me wonder if she wasn’t telling something.  But when she switched topics, I let it go.

I wasn’t one for wearing skirts a lot.  Not that they bothered me but frankly they just weren’t as comfortable as jeans.  On top of that my toothpick legs and top heavy chest that just weren’t quite proportional together.  I didn’t have the hips for skirts.  Somehow today I got talked into a mini skirt of Maggie’s that didn’t really fit me right in my opinion.  It didn’t fit the way it fit Maggie.  She was only a bit shorter than me but she had the added curves.  Hers weren’t the heavy curves of the Luca’s sisters but gentler and a bit more graceful.  That is why we could share clothes.

In a compromise, I wore short legging underneath.  I wasn’t quite bold for the naked leg look. Thankfully, it was part of the latest style trend so Maggie was fine with it. To top it off, the weather channel was predicting that it was going into the thirties tonight not that I would be outside that long.

By the time we showed for the party, it was in full swing.  This was a senior’s party where only a select number of under classmen would attend.  Thus we were able to find a spot on the street not too far from the house.

“We are ready to carouse all night,” I said moving my hips to make Maggie laugh.

“What is carouse?” she said.

“It means to party, my friend,” I said and mocked her laughter.

“You are seriously demented with your SAT words,” she said.

I countered her with, “The better to beat you at scrabble my dear,” I said mimicking the big bad wolf from fable of three little pigs.

“I don’t play scrabble, but I will bet you will get a higher SAT score then I will,” she added and we laughed our way inside the house.

Maggie had done my hair.  With her skilled hands with a flat iron, my hair was slick and smooth.  But it wasn’t my hair do that had people in awe.  Peopled stopped Maggie all along the way for our search of our boyfriends.  Maggie’s normally spirally curly hair was also tamed smoothed straight.  Her look was more drastic change than mine thus the compliments and constant fuss over her all the way to the back of the house.

I thought I spotted the top of Flynn’s head.  There was no mistaking the messy Mohawk he had that total worked for him, as much as I didn’t like to admit it.  He stood against the back wall of the room.  I continued to pull Maggie in that direction.

I found the elite all sitting around on one of the sofas that was pushed against the wall Flynn leaned against.  It appeared it had been moved to create the dance floor in the middle of the room just like it had been done at all the parties I’d been to lately.  Maggie dashed to Brent.

She nearly knocked him off his perch.  He’d been sitting on the edge of the sofa.  They careened back and he made a small sound of surprise and pain when she landed on his hurt shoulder.  She hadn’t needed to apologize because he kissed her ever so affectionately in front of the group.  Of course the members of the elite to which I was an honorary member due to my boyfriend included the usual suspects of Jay, Kathy, Brent, Flynn, Luke, Amanda and well Nina too.

Meeting Luke’s eyes, his grin widened and he reached for my hand.  Pulling me too him he spun me so I landed on his lap with my back pressed to the curve of his chest.  He wrapped his arms around me and perched his chin on my shoulder.  I bit my lip as everyone seemed to look at us in favor of not watching Brent and Maggie make out.

The boy who was hosting the party was standing talking to Flynn.  Even though he’d probably been there the whole time, I just noticed him.  He was kind of popular but not really at the same time if that makes any sense.  I didn’t know him very well but he seemed nice enough if rumors were true.  The absolute clue on his status was when he left, the conversation resumed.

“Mercy in a skirt,” Flynn said. “I never thought I’d see the day.”  I rolled my eyes and didn’t dignify what he said with a comment. Amanda and Nina stalked off not so soon after Flynn made a comment I wish he’d kept to himself.

Luke on the other hand whispered in my ear. “You look great.  That’s what he meant to say, but you know Flynn.”

Someone handed Flynn a couple of bottles of beer.  Next thing I knew Luke had one.  I turned one down when they were handed around.  Alcohol was always ever present at these events and I wondered who the supplier was.

The DJ, and yes, there was an actual one at this party.  He may have been a student at school, but he had all the equipment it looked so professional.  I guess our host was going all out to make his mark this year.  When the next song came on, people came to life and lifted bottles and cups of liquid in the air.  Everyone moved to the beat of the latest popular dance song.

I happened to like the song myself.  It was in my latest playlist.  Luke and his friends were far too cool tonight to actual do anything more than hold their beers up in the air.  I on the other hand stood and pulled Luke to the dance floor.  Kathy and Maggie followed my lead pulling Brent and Jay with them.  I don’t know what happened to Flynn because he didn’t follow us. Inspired by everyone moving with the music the DJ played several of the top dance songs in a row.

Spinning a slow song which was actually a hip hop song with a slower beat, the DJ tempted fate but most everyone made the leap from hoping around in a drunken haze to a methodical sway that would put the classic movie Dirty Dancing to shame.  I should have left the dance floor, but like everyone else I was caught up in my dance partner.  Also, I happen to like dancing a lot.  With several years of ballet, jazz, and tap under my belt, I could move with the best to any beat.

Luke tossed back the rest of his beer before wrapping his arms around me bottle teetering in between his fingers.  I moved in closer to him and he gripped my hips.  I was parched from the heat of the surround swaying bodies not to mention the heat growing between Luke and I had reached a fever point. He leaned down and kissed my neck.  Automatically, I leaned my head back giving him more access. When his lips met my ear, he whispered in my ear.  “Let’s go.”

He pulled me past Maggie and Brent who looked like one body.  Jay and Kathy had no shame either.  It was almost like the music had some control over the mood of the crowd.

On the way out of the room, we walked past the DJ booth.  Curious as to whom had the group all enthralled, I took more than a passing glance at the guy.  His face was down searching his computer while I assumed he programmed in more music.  We were almost totally past him when he finally looked up.

“Sebastian,” I said but the music swallowed up my voice.

He smiled but turned his attention back to the computer screen.  Luke grip on my hand tighten as he tugged me further.  He was oblivious to my observation.  I wasn’t sure where we were going, but I let him lead me.  I kept turning back to see if it really had been who I through it was with an earphone pressed to his ear like a real DJ.  We zoomed past Flynn who was pressed to the wall by a girl with a long blond braid.  Turning the corner, I got of profile view of the girl whose mouth plastered to his was on an expedition to find his tonsils.  I blinked several times trying to discover what alternate universe I stepped in.  The girl in question looked vaguely like Bernadette, the psycho girl who’d tried to kill us both not too long ago.  If it was her, that had to be Sebastian.  What in the hell were they doing here and was Flynn really dating a demon now?

Rapidly, thing got out of hand quickly. There was a growl or a roar of some sort and bodies began to fall on the dance floor.  I was beginning to wonder if I’d ever attend a party where things didn’t get out of hand.

Luke’s hand dropped from mine.  He moved hastily back to the dance floor.  From the corner of my eye, Flynn moved in that direction as well.  In slow motion, I turned to look back and see Brent gripping some guy’s neck in what looked like a death grip.  The boy looked like he was turning blue.  In contrast, Brent’s face was boiling red with Maggie desperately saying something with tears in her eyes.  I couldn’t hear because the music hadn’t stopped yet.  People were moving away, while Jay tried to pull Brent off the poor boy.   I watched in horror as his chest slow to a point it looked as though he was no longer breathing.  Desperately, I thought of how I could possible help this situation.

Luke and Flynn finally reached Brent in what could have only been seconds, but felt like long minutes.  They were able to get Brent’s hand from the boy’s throat.  The lifeless body dropped to the floor with the sound of someone screaming. No longer able to just watch, I began to run to help Maggie who was now leaning down to the unmoving figure on the ground.  It didn’t matter that I shouldn’t try to attempt CPR being a succubus, I could stand there and do nothing.  Before I could reach the boy, Sebastian was in front of me.

Out of nowhere Tom came crashing in the room and one handedly grabbed Brent from the clutches of Flynn, Jay, and Luke and pulled him towards an outside door.  The things you notice in a crisis.  Man for a slight boy, Tom had amazing strength.  Flynn and Luke knelt with Maggie to help the boy.

“I need to help,” I said.  But Sebastian had other plans. We crossed out of my reality and into his.  The faint pop and suction was so quick, I barely was aware of it.  I looked around not sure where I was.  Sebastian was no longer holding me which was the only way he could transport me that I knew of.  “Where are we?” I yelled at him.

“In the backyard,” he said.

“Why’d you do that?” I asked angrily. However, I was happy he hadn’t taken me far.

“I needed to talk to you,” he answered.

“So tell me whatever it is.  I need to go back and find out if I can help.”

“The boy is fine,” he said to me to alleviate my fears.

“How’d you know that?” I asked.

He looked at me like I was stupid or something. “My goodness, Kayla you have so much to learn.”

“Don’t I know,” I said speaking my thoughts out loud.

But when I noticed Tom and Brent on the side of the house less than forty yards from us, my mind changed directions.  Brent was by far the bigger guy but Tom seemed to be in control.  Brent was cowering under Tom words.  I couldn’t hear, but Tom was most certainly upset.  His mouth moved rapidly with his arms moved in tandem with wild gestures.

“Kayla,” Sebastian said.

“Huh,” I said turning my attention back to him.  I heard the door to the house open again and looked up in time to see Flynn and Luke exit the house.  At first they were headed towards Brent until Luke saw me.

His eyes narrowed and he moved in haste in our direction.  Flynn tried to stop him by putting a hand on his shoulder, but Luke shrugged him off.  There was anger in his face and determination in his steps.

“Kayla, listen to me you are in danger,” Sebastian said looking at me then Luke who was halfway to us.  Sebastian’s eyes changed.  His eyes filled in completely black.  Then, he popped out of my vision just as a bright light seem to erupt from nowhere.  I turned my head to look straight into the light.  But I thought vaguely I’d closed my eyes, because I was consumed by darkness.

Chapter Thirty Four

effrontery (n.) impudence, nerve, insolence

Disoriented, I woke up in what had to be Luke’s car.  I recognized the interior immediately.  My hand rose to my head where I felt the pain of a rapidly growing pulsating headache.

“What happened?” I asked groggily.  I hadn’t yet turned to look at him, but I knew he was there.

Hesitantly, he said, “You passed out.”

Thinking back I remember I’d been talking to Sebastian. “Where’s Sebastian?” I asked.

Like heavy humidity, I could feel the thick tension rise in the car.  When he spoke again, it sounded as if it took him a great deal to hold back his anger. “I don’t know,” he said.

You’re in Danger, Sebastian’s last words rang in my head.  I remembered Luke had caught sight of us with a murderous look on his face.  He wasn’t happy in the slightest.  Something on the edge of my memory also bothered me but I couldn’t get a hold of it with the pulsing pain in my head.

Lightly, he touched a part of my exposed forehead with the back of his fingers.  Just when his fingers touched my skin it felt as though he were treating me like a delicate flower.  Not sure why, I flinched away.  He moved his hand away and leaned back in his chair hard with his head making a bouncing noise as it hit the leather head rest.

“Are you afraid of me?” he asked softly.

For some unknown reason, a part of me was but I had no idea why. Another part of me trusted him implicitly, so I lied because I really had no reason to fear him. “No,” I said weakly.

“Is there something going on between you and Sebastian?” he asked.  Momentarily he looked away gripping the steering wheel with white knuckles waiting for my response.  Dimly, I wondered how many more times he was going to put up with asking me this question with a different guys name attached to it.

Rather than be understanding, I found I was annoyed by the question and how he said it.  It had the air of accusation.  “No,” I said.

“Did you invite him?” he asked. I was surprised by his effrontery.

Was this twenty questions?  He was treating me like I was on trial.  I was starting to get pissed off and maybe because my forehead wrinkled in annoyance which added to my discomfort.

“No,” I said again with my displeasure in the question showing through. “How could I employ him to DJ a party I wasn’t throwing?  Maybe you should be asking Flynn.  I saw him making out with Bernadette.”

He didn’t speak.  I closed my eyes wishing for Motrin or Advil.  I broke the bitter silence with a question of my own.  “What the hell happened back there?  Why did I pass out?” I asked with my eyes back on him.  I was certain he had answers.

He seemed to shut down.  He didn’t look away though and his expression was familiar.  I’d seen the same in my mother’s face when she refused to answer my questions as well.  I reached for the door handle.  I’d already spotted that we were parked in front of the grand house I now called home.  I stepped out into the night and pushed a little too hard when I closed the door.  He knew something and he wasn’t sharing.  I didn’t feel much like being with him right then.

I fished in my pocket for keys.  The brass door knob was cold to the touch from the night air.  When I turned to go inside, Luke was there.  I hadn’t heard him come.

“I know you don’t want me here, but I can’t leave you alone,” he said.

I looked into his eyes.  They looked like pools of water, the blue was so clear.  “Where’s Flynn,” I asked.

“He took Maggie home,” he said.  I should have been there for Maggie.  I walked in letting him come.  He was right, I wasn’t sure I wanted him here but he’d promised my mom to babysit me.  Sebastian’s words scared me.

I started to head upstairs after only two steps up the curved staircase, Luke’s words echoed through the house. “You have to know I’d never hurt you,” he said.

Stopping, I turned and looked at the boy whom I cared for so deeply.  I wasn’t sure where my earlier fear came from but I did know that I trusted him no matter how odd that seemed.  “I know,” I said.  I looked at the floor nervously fidgeting with my hands hung low.

He walked over to me.  I towered over him for the first time on my perch two steps up.  He reached for me and placed his head on my chest.  I found myself comforting him for the first time as I ran my hair though his silky curls.

Our emotions were both raw and I couldn’t stay mad at him.  I held out my hand and he took it.  I led him to my room.  I was going to continue to be stupid.  But isn’t that what you are when you are in love.

On the far right at the end of the hall I entered the room which looked out the back onto the expansive grounds through two large windows including window seats.  Padded cushions that set on top of the seats would make for great reading spaces in the future.  A chest of drawers with a flat panel television mounted on the wall sat between those windows.  To the right of the door was my new dresser made from solid wood.  My bathroom where I was headed now with a change of clothes lay on the other side of my room much like Luke’s.  My room wasn’t as large as his though.

I closed the door, but didn’t lock it.  I trusted Luke not to come in.  Brushing my hair back into a pony I twisted and tucked it so my hair would flap everywhere.  I washed what little makeup I wore off and brushed my teeth.  I applied a coat of the balm on my lips before I exited the room.

Luke sat in a window seat looking out.  When he spoke I wasn’t even sure he was speaking to me as he eyes stayed looking out the window into the night. “I’ve never been this jealous before,” he said.

Not sure what else to do I moved to the bed and sat.  I didn’t speak giving him a chance to say what was on his mind.  “I’m not sure what I’d do if I lost you,” he said painfully.

My reaction to his grief was to get up and walked to him.  I hugged him again to my chest before he pulled me down into his lap. “There’s no one but you,” I said.

“Are you sure about that?” he asked.  I hesitated one second too long.  “Never mind, don’t answer that,” he said.

“Luke,” I said.

But he interrupted. “Let’s just enjoy the moment.”

I complied.  We sat in the cover of darkness in my room gazing on the stars much like we did at the lake house.

Night after night I would wake from the intense calling of my name.  I hadn’t done anything crazy like sleep walk again, but my mom along with everyone else feared the worst for me.  It was only a matter of time for whatever it was to come after me.  Only when Luke stayed with me did I sleep without dreams.  Monday morning loomed over me like a dead weight.  I was tired and exhausted from lack of sleep.

As much as I wanted him to, Luke hadn’t stayed with me the rest of the weekend.  Flynn hadn’t been very helpful as to where the voices were coming from.  Of course he offered to stay in my room with me, but for now I had declined.  Flynn and I weren’t friends like Paul and I.  There was always an undercurrent of things better left unsaid that flowed between us.

“Still having bad dreams,” Flynn asked on our ride to school.  His eyes were on the road, but I knew he glanced over.

I yawned grateful that next week was Christmas break.  We would be out of school for nearly two weeks.  It sounded like heaven. “Yes,” I said.

“My offers still open. I know I’m not Luke, but I’ll watch over you,” he said with a slight cadence of sarcasm.  When he glanced to me I rolled my eyes letting him know I caught his meaning.

“Your effrontery is still mind boggling,” I said.

“I mean like a sister, Webster. Have no fear, I won’t do anything,” he said.  I laughed softly but didn’t answer.  I thought I just might take him up on it.  That tells you just how tired I really was.

The car hadn’t heated up fully yet so I leaned into the seat, snuggling into Luke’s jacket that was like a blanket from the wintry air of December.  Because there was a basketball game today, the Principal had declared it spirit day.  I had gotten Luke’s football jersey to wear over a white long sleeve tee.

According to Maggie, Amber had been torn as to whether or not to wear her cheerleading uniform alone or add Paul’s baseball jersey on top.  It was a status symbol in school to show your school pride and the fact you had a boyfriend at the same time.  Even though it was basketball season, traditionally any jersey for whatever sport you participated in was welcome on these days.  I was sure Amanda would hate this day.

Maggie had carefully planned this day out down to the orange ribbon I wore in my hair.  I didn’t complain because this was the first time in three years I was able to participate in this way for spirit day.

I am not sure how to explain this but as soon as I walked into school the hairs on my neck stood at end and I felt the creepy factor.  I was walking as usual holding Luke’s hand with our fingers entwined.  My looking around finally had Luke asked me what was up.

“I don’t know,” I said still looking for something I couldn’t find.

I continued to walk proudly with Luke at my side.  We walked past a group of girls in hand decorated tee shirts who had been giggling moments before only to glare at the group of us now.  Jay, Luke, Flynn, and Brent make an impression.  Maggie, Kathy, and I walked past wearing their football jerseys.  You could almost smell the envy.  Believe me I was familiar with the scent, because I’d worn it the last two years.  If someone told me last year that I would be walking the hall amongst the now senior elite, I would have died from laughter.

Up ahead, Paul stood at his locker with Amber waving.  Apparently, she’d decided that adding Paul’s baseball jersey on top tied tight at the waist with a knot was a suitable compromise.  Maggie walked up to her hugging Amber like they were best friends.  Luke let go of my hand assuming I was going to follow but I hesitated for a moment.  Flynn, Jay, and Brent whose lockers were nearby went to open them.  Luke hadn’t moved unsure what to do since I made no movement.  He waited with me.

Maggie and Amber separated and turned in my direction.  Before the awkwardness settled in, I forced myself forward.  Luke turned and opened his locker.

“Hey Mercy, don’t you look super cute,” Amber said in her best cheerleader voice.  I wanted to roll my eyes but forced a smile.  It wasn’t her it was me.  I just wasn’t that bubbly ever even when I’m not tired.

“You too,” I managed to say without a hint of sarcasm.  A point for me.  Amber was a sweet girl.  I shouldn’t hate her for the company she kept which included Nina.

Maggie and Amber went back to talking about whatever the latest gossip was.  I looked aimlessly around the halls trying to find my escape.  As fate would have it I saw Miss Gibson stumble out of her room.  She almost looked drunk considering her movements.

Maggie as usual noticed I wasn’t paying her any attention.  “What are you looking at?” Maggie said.  I wasn’t sure what to make what I was looking at, so I pointed.

“Oh my god,” Maggie said. Amber also turned to see what we were looking at.  I was surprised nobody else was staring.  It wasn’t everyday you saw your teaching making out in the hallway.

“Super for her,” Amber said.  Isn’t weird how when someone is happy in their life, they want everyone else to be happy too?  But heaven forbid when they are unhappy, because then you should never let that friend know how happy you are.

“From his profile he looks like a hotty,” Maggie commented.

Miss Gibson looked up and saw us staring.  She tapped her beau and nodded for them to take it back inside.  Although I waited on baited breath the guy never turned his head so I could see his face.  I couldn’t help but think I knew him.  But that couldn’t be.  What guys did I know that would date Ms. Gibson?  One actually, Brad was probably around her age.  She was young.  Young enough the guys that had her class would make comments about wanting extra help after school with a wink and a nod to each other.

But it didn’t look like Brad.  Heck, I really hope it wasn’t.  His sensibilities would be shot if he only knew I was a high school student.

When Luke’s put his arms around my shoulder, I let him lead me away.  Seeing Miss Gibson so happy reminded me just what I had.  So when Luke walked me to class, I kissed him full on the mouth in front of all passersby.  I think I shocked him with my public display of affection.  He’d always been the one to make the moves except for that first kiss.  He left smiling just like me.

The day began with announcements that reminded everyone that lunch was a closed campus in light of all the disappearances.  Moreover, there was a lengthy announcement from the principal herself about being diligent to one’s surroundings.  It was a cold reminder that everything wasn’t ok.  A sort of foreboding clinched in my stomach for the rest of day.  I barely had an appetite for lunch.  Instead, I listened to the chatting around me.

Amanda made a show to tell everyone that she was going out with some college boy this weekend.  If she hoped to get a rise out of Flynn, she hadn’t paid much attention to the rumors about him before she dated him.  It was kind of sad.  Flynn even smiled and told her that was great.

She on the other hand showed her true feelings then.  She crumpled in tears leaving the lunch room with Nina at her heals.  I shot Flynn an angry look, but it did no good.  I didn’t necessarily like Amanda all that much, but he didn’t have to be so mean.  He shrugged his shoulders and bit into a cookie.  Luke rubbed my back letting me know he’d understood but like the rest of the guys he didn’t speak up in Amanda’s defense.

Later, when Flynn pulled into the circular drive out front of his house another car was parked outside.  I stopped to peek at the car before going inside.

“It’s a Maserati,” Flynn said.  I’d never seem one up close in person.  I tell you it was a treat.  Cars were somewhat of a secret thrill for me.  I didn’t subscribe to Car and Driver magazine or anything.  But once when I was young, I dreamed of being a race car driver.  I’d never told anyone not even Luke.  I think my mom knew.  I had a few small scale die cast metal cars of some of my favorite models in a box under my bed.  I’d forgotten about that box, because it had been quite a while since I looked at them.  I made a mental note to check them out the next time I was home.

“It’s a Gran Turismo S,” Flynn said as he watched me admire the car. “The price starts in the low six figures.”

I leaned back giving a pathetic whistle.  I just wasn’t that good at whistling but it was reaction that came natural to me under the circumstances.  Thankfully, I hadn’t laid hands on it.  When we walked inside, David and my mom were in an intense discussion with none other than Luke’s dad.  I’d never met the man, but damn if Luke and he didn’t look a lot alike.  His father was a bit taller than David.  He had a short crop of blond hair that waved letting me know if he grew it a bit longer it would curl much like his son’s.  His pale and shining blue eyes looked like aquamarines. There was something unearthly beautiful about the man.

There was also something very spooky about him too.  His eyes were on me the moment I walked in the door and they weren’t friendly.  Since I hadn’t yet met either of Luke’s parents, I felt an odd sense of fear.  I stood motionless just inside the door.  Flynn said something to me but my eyes were locked with Luke’s dad.  It was if he had control over me.

Apparently, he had been huddled in while speaking to David and my mom.  He stood straight and really towered over the two of them.  David wasn’t a short man either.  I hadn’t noticed that he’d been leaning in to talk to our parents until that moment.  He was really tall and imperial with sharp facial features that should be sculpted.

He began walking towards me and I was sure I hadn’t yet breathed.  What would I say?  His eyes burned through me like a quiet flame.  He looked as though he’d already made judgment of me and the verdict wasn’t good.  His strides were longs and he’d crossed the room in nothing more than a few steps.  He looked like a king.

Icy blue eyes only left mine only when he passed me.  Opening the door, he left without saying a single word to me.  A gasp of air escaped my throat when the door closed behind him.  Flynn had given up talking to me.  It didn’t matter, because I hadn’t heard a word.  He left me and walked over to his dad.

My ears finally worked because I heard what was said next.  “Flynn, we have to go out,” David said.  It was the first thing I’d heard upon entering the house.

“Please stay with Mercy,” I heard my mom say.

Flynn spoke, “I can’t.”

I looked up at my mother’s face. It was crinkled into a frown.  David patted her shoulder. “He can’t,” he told her.  I understood the meaning.  Flynn had to go on his date for his survival.

Her face softened.  David said to her, “What about Paul?”

My mom shook her head no. “Even though he knows about us, he isn’t strong enough to protect her.”

Flynn said, “I’ll call Luke.”  David nodded and my mom threw up her hands.  It was so strange for them all to talk about me as if I wasn’t there.  Flynn was busy using his fingers to text on his phone.  My mom had gotten her jacket as did David.

“Can you at least stay until he gets here?” she asked Flynn.

He nodded.  My mom walked to the door and finally acknowledged me.

“I’m trusting you, Mercy,” she said and walked out.

David said, “Be safe Mercy.”

I stood stunned.  What was I to say?  I had so many questions.  Why was Luke’s Dad here?  What did he have to do with their investigation into the missing girls?  Why was Luke a better option than Paul to stay with me? What did Flynn know that I didn’t?  Sebastian had been the only one to voice to me I was in danger but obviously everyone thought I was.

“Flynn, what’s going on?” I asked.  He was still texting or doing something on his phone.

He briefly looked up to say, “You’re the one having dreams with someone calling you and voices telling you to do things.  That coupled with the missing girls ending up wherever we are, says somehow you may be involved.”

His phone rang and he answered.  He began walking away and up the stairs.  I followed, but his conversation didn’t end.  Not wanting to pry on his privacy, I headed to my end of the hall to my room.  I turned on the television.

I found a news station and waited.  It didn’t terribly long for the news anchor to get to the stories of the missing women, but long enough.  There were approximately nine women missing or dead that were suspected to be related crimes.  I was aware of about half that.  Where had I been?

“Mercy,” Flynn said with his head popped in the door. “Luke should be here any minute.”

“Yeah,” I said turning my attention back to the television but the anchor had moved on to a new story.

I turned back to Flynn whose damp hair and change of clothes was my clue that he’d showered.  He stood in my door with a faded navy hoddie with jeans and Timberlines on.  I swear I hated him.  No matter what he wore he looked good.  The alarm chimed when the door opened.

“He’s here,” Flynn said.

“You left the door unlocked,” I asked incredulously.

He looked at me with that duh expression. “Mercy, if a supernatural being wanted inside, do you honestly think a locked door would hold them back.”  He didn’t mention that David had paid a witch to ward his house, because I already knew that.

Imagine my surprise when my ninth grade English teacher little old Mrs. Grimes came to cast spells around the house.  Flynn had to tell me more than once not to gape at her.  I’d been sworn to secrecy about what she was.  Flynn added that we weren’t the only supernatural beings at school.  He hadn’t elaborated.

Mrs. Grimes told us that she could only do her best to ward off demons because we were part of that group.  We needed to get in and out of the house.  So she had amended her spell to include demons that meant us harm. The shocker came when she said she wouldn’t ward against vampires because they would have to request entry into the house anyway.  What no one said is that we thought the killer was an incubus.  For obvious reason, Mrs. Grimes couldn’t ward against that particular group of demons.  So I pursed my lips at Flynn statement because he was right.

“See you later,” he said and ducked out the door.

I heard him say Later Bro then a crack from a hand slap.  Luke sauntered in my room wearing a swish muscle shirt and sweat pants.  I wondered if he’d come from working out.  Nearly reaching out, I almost went to touch his arm muscles.  It was very tempting.

“Hey,” he said.

“Hey,” I said back.

“You look tired,” he said.

“Yeah, I sorry you got dragged over here to babysit me,” I said sarcastically.  I pulled my knees up to my chest with my arms around my legs.

He walked over and untangled my human pretzel only to wrapped me in his arms. “Like there is any place I rather be,” he said.  “Especially when it is sanctioned by your mother.”

“Luke,” I said.  He looked down at me. “Your dad was here earlier?”

His arms dropped away from me.  He looked perplexed and a bit angry for a moment.  Then he walked over to the window and stared out.  “Did he say anything?”

“No, he didn’t say a word to me,” I said.

“Figures,” he said.  His expression was grim.

As much as I wanted to know, I didn’t ask.  I didn’t think it was my business whatever was going on with his family.  I figured he’d tell me if he wanted me to know.  So I avoided the follow up question and went for a different approach.  “So he knows about the missing girls,” I said.

He continued to stare off in the distance and I held back from crossing to him. “I’m sure that’s why he’s in town,” he said.

Inappropriately, I yawned but I couldn’t help it.  Lack of sleep gave me no control over to stopping it.  He turned around and looked me up and down. “You’re not wearing your favorite pink Juicy sweats,” he said smiling.

I laughed surprised he’d noticed them. “I haven’t yet changed for bed,” I said grinning.

“Do you need some help?” he teased.

“You wish,” I said and then I sauntered to my bathroom.  I couldn’t shake the feeling that everyone including Luke was hiding something from me.

Chapter Thirty Five

obfuscate (v.) to render incomprehensible

Blissfully, I had dreamless sleep.  Ever since the house had been warded I hadn’t been plagued with voices or crazy dreams.  It certainly helped though that Luke had been there with me last night.  Nothing untoward happened either. The sun woke me up right before the buzz of my alarm did the deed.  What was more shocking was Luke was still sleep beside me.  My first thought was that my mother was going to freak if she found out that Luke had slept in my room last night.  I jumped out of bed like I’d been lying on hot coals.  Unfortunately, my foot caught on the sheet and down I went.  Pushing my hair back, I slapped a hand on bed steadying myself to stand.  When my face crested over the side of the bed with my hair spilling over my face like a mop, Luke eyed me not yet moving.

When he quirked a smile, I couldn’t help but giggle myself.  I fell back on the floor with fits of laughter.  Slowly, his voice peaked over the side of the bed to eye me on floor.  When I continued to laugh, he shook his head and rolled back over.  I was nearly in tears with laughter when I finally was able to walk to the bathroom.

My mother couldn’t be home, I thought to myself before I said morning to Luke closing myself behind the doors before he got up.  When I peeked out the bathroom door a short while later, Luke wasn’t in the room. I assumed he gone to another room to use the bathroom to get ready.  So I got dressed before heading downstairs.

The shock came once I hit the last stair.  I heard my mother voice coming from the direction of the kitchen. Crap, I thought.  I didn’t turn instead I squared my shoulders and headed in.

“Good morning, Mom,” I said cheerfully.

“Morning Mercy,” she said eyeing me suspiciously.

She didn’t let on that she was aware of my sleeping arrangements last night.  So I did what I always did not knowing what else to do.  ”Do you want me to make breakfast?”

“No, I’ve eaten,” she said.

I stood looking at her expectantly.  I wasn’t used to her saying no.  What should I do now?  Understanding my behavior was odd I said, “Do you have any leads yet?” I asked.

“Things are getting,” she began then looked behind me. “Hi Luke,” she said her voice changing to something less than pleasant.  “Sleep well,” she added.

The way she said it, I was sure she knew Luke had slept in my room.  “Morning,” he said unabashedly. “I slept fine.”  I think I nearly choked.

My mom unperturbed turned and poured herself some coffee when Flynn came in the kitchen.  He said to Luke, “Hey, you’re still here?” Silently, I winced placing my shaking hands on the counter to steady myself.  Flynn eyed me suspiciously.  Luke however poured a cup of coffee with practiced steady hands.

Well, now if there was any doubt about Luke’s whereabouts Flynn sure cleared that up.  I stood there waiting but my mom’s harsh words never came.  I didn’t look at her either.  Thankfully, David walked in the kitchen and suddenly in the large space the room felt crowded.

“Good Morning everyone,” David said with his easy nature.  He hadn’t known what he walked into.  When he kissed my mother on the cheek, I could tell by his facial expression he’d assumed there was a problem.  David, the problem solver, figured it out quickly.  “When I saw you this morning, I should have warned you that one of the shower nozzles was broken in that room’s bathroom,” David said to Luke.

Flynn checking in, trying to make up for his earlier outburst said, “So that’s where you slept.”

Luke ignored his comment and opted instead to say, “I can drive Mercy to school.”

Flynn nodded, then foraged for food.  I wasn’t hungry given my current circumstances.  I knew I was in trouble and waited for my mother to yell or ask to speak to me privately.   I wasn’t sure she bought David’s story.  I was however sure he hadn’t lied but he wasn’t stupid either.  He had to know that Luke hadn’t slept in that room.

In the meantime, I wasn’t being a good host.  Luke had already gotten coffee on his own. But I remembered that Luke had spent much more time in this house than I ever had, so technically he was more like family than a guest to them.

My mom dressed in nurses’ garb moved to David and gave him a kiss with her to go coffee mug still in her hand.  “I’m going to be late,” she told him.

Then she came over to me. Putting her free hand on my shoulder she said, “You looked peaceful last night.” My eyes wide flew up to her.  She knew.  Her words had obfuscated me.  Then she said, “Have a Happy Birthday.” She kissed my forehead before walking away.

She nodded at Flynn who nodded back.  Then she said pleasantly, “Thanks Luke for last night.”

Clearly, I was still sleep or this was the twilight zone.  My mother knew Luke slept in my room last night and she told Luke thank you.  No, this couldn’t be happening.  I pinched myself and I felt it.

I looked over to David.  When our eyes met, looking the part of a CEO in a suit and tie, he said, “Happy Birthday, Mercy.”

He came and gave me a kiss on the cheek.  “Luke, I guess we’ll see you tonight,” he said.  Luke nodded.  Then he spoke to his son. “You’re coming home before you go out right?” he asked.

Flynn said, “Yeah, I said I’ll be here.”  Everyone was being so casual.  Then it hit me.  I must really be in a ton of danger if both my mom and Flynn’s dad were on board with this sleeping arrangement.  Did Luke’s parents know what was going on?  Luke’s coming and goings didn’t seem a big concern for his parents.  His mom didn’t seem to care where Luke spent the night.  Did guys have it better than girls, because I was certain that his parents knew.

The front door closed as David and my mom left for work.  Luke looked at me.  Without David’s comment it was clear he had showered.  His hair was damp.  He wore jeans and a black graphic tee that said Just Do It of all things.  “You’re not going to eat?” he asked.

My mind was still reeling with how ok my mom was acting.  She’d been cool when Paul spent over.  But usually we’d fallen asleep in the living room and not on purpose.  We’d always been watching movies late into the night.  But Luke had been in my room and in my bed.  This was not a succubus thing.  My mom was not that liberal.

“Is everyone crazy?” I asked. Flynn turned to look at me too.  “My mom is sanctioning me having sleepovers with Luke.”

Flynn laughed and said, “She didn’t go down without a fight.”

I remembered last night before she left and her words I’m trusting you reverberated in my head.

“So why didn’t anyone tell me.  I was obfuscated by her thanking Luke,” I said because Luke’s face was impassive.  He’d known when he came over what the deal was.

“And miss your priceless expression,” Flynn said shaking his head. “Luke can’t watch over you from the other side of the house.”

What had my life come too?  Somehow none of it seemed real standing in Flynn’s kitchen with two of the hottest guys in school.  I slept under one roof with both of them.  This was surreal at best.

Flynn then said, “I can’t wait for March.”

Luke and I both turned to him. “Why,” I said confused.

“So you, Webster, can start talking like normal people.  Who uses the word, obfuscate?” he said and rolled his eyes.

“Unlike you, I need good score to get in the school of my choice.  Using a word every day helps me retain its meaning,” I protested weakly.

They both just stared at me for a moment before breaking into a guffaw of laughter.  “By the way, Happy Birthday, Merriam.  I should call you that by the way.  It is your first name Miss Webster?” Flynn added once he could breathe again.  We all just busted out laughing some more.

When I finally got in Luke’s car, I was met with a bouquet of Mylar balloons attached to a gift bag.  I had to pull them out of the car, so I could get in.  Luke was there in time to take them from my hand.  His other hand reached around me under his jacket I wore and drew me close.

I bit my lower lip in anticipation. “Happy Birthday,” he said before his mouth descended to mine.

Had I put the balm on?  It was too late to answer that question in advance of the kiss.  When our lips pressed together my mind clouded.  It rained tiny explosions of light.

He pulled back just in time and I bit my lip again shyly.  “Thanks,” I said.  Truthfully, with all that was going on I halfway forgot my own birthday.  I didn’t think anyone would remember except for maybe my mother with all the things that were going on.

I got in the car and he handed me the gift bag.  He closed my door and opened the back door to secure the balloons so he’d be able to see out his rear view mirror.  When had he bought the balloons?  But then I guess he could have come over with them last night.  I held the gift bag not sure what to do.  Should I wait or open it?  I waited.  I didn’t want to seem anxious.

He got behind the wheel and I looked up to see that Flynn hadn’t waited on us.  He was already gone.  We could have all ridden together but I guess Flynn had other plans right after school.

Turning the car on then looking over at me, Luke said, “Go ahead and open it.”  It’s always weird when you open gifts in front of people.  What if I didn’t like it?  Would I be able to hide my expression?

Maneuvering the car around the drive, we were on the street headed to school before I opened the bag.  Inside was a small blue box with white ribbon.  I’d seen boxes like this and knew exactly where the present came from.  I tugged the silky white ribbon lightly.  It loosened then fell away with gently pressure.

Inside, on a small square bed of white cotton like material, was a blue suede bag.  I loosened the draw string and pulled out a silver necklace.  Dangling from the change was a solid puffed heart with a Return to Tiffany’s heart shaped hang tag behind it.  When I touched the charms the hang tag turned and I realized something was on the back.  Engraved on the back were five words, ‘My heart belongs to you’.

I turned and smiled to him. I’d never gotten jewelry from a guy before.  At a stop light he turned and said, “Do you like it?”

I was almost choked up. “Yes,” I said awed.  He smiled and turned back as the light changed.  Once we were parked at school, I held my hair as he put it on for me.  I barely had time to kiss him before our friends descended around his car.

Maggie was there with a balloon in her hand.  Happy Birthdays were said from the group and I don’t think I was ever given this many hugs before.   At my locker Maggie beamed with pride because more balloons were tied to the handle.

“Maggs,” I said. “You’re the best.”  I hugged her again.

As a rule, I spent the whole day carrying all the balloons including Luke’s with me.  By last period I was ready to release them to the sky.  I just wasn’t used to all the attention.  Underclassmen with dream of grandeur wished me happy birthday with hopes of their own for future popularity.  It was weird because I didn’t consider myself popular although I did hang with the elite seniors.

In my previous class, Paul had been there waiting.  In his embrace, he whispered, “Happy Birthday,” without Amber’s eyes to watch us.  He also gave me a small gift bag that I tucked in my locker on the way to my last class.  There wasn’t enough time for me to open it yet.

Miss Gibson was absent from class.  For once we had a substitute of the male persuasion.  He was really cute.  Most of class had been made up of the female students doing everything short of straight up offers to get his attention.  I’d managed to limit myself only to a few dignified thumbs up in Maggie’s direction when he turned to write on the chalk board.

After class with school out, Maggie hugged me again and said, “Sorry, I can’t come over tonight.” She thrust a gift bag in my hand. “I’m worried about Brent,” she said. “I’m going over there now. But first open it.”

Brent had been missing days at school here and there.  She didn’t explain why she wasn’t hanging out with me on my birthday.  I understood what it was like to have a boyfriend now.  I wouldn’t blame her because I would have done the same.

I pried open the bag that had been taped shut at the top.  Inside were a short white skirt and a navy scoop tee with the name of the best store in the mall written across it.  “Maggie, thanks.”  That store wasn’t cheap.  I could only hope she’d found it on sale.  I hated to think Maggie spent too much on me.  Our friendship was more than material things.

“You should wear it tonight,” she said.  Then she came closer and touched my necklace.  “This is really pretty, Eme.  Luke is like an awesome boyfriend, so thoughtful.  Have you done the do yet?”

I was taken aback by her question. “No,” I said in shock.

“Eme, you two are totally in love and right for each other.  You know you could tell me,” she said.

“Maggs, you will be the first to know if it happens.  But honestly, it hasn’t yet,” I said.  I started to bite my nails.

“You’re hiding something,” she said.

“Why do you think that?” I asked.

“You’re biting your nails.  It’s your tell,” she said.

“My what,” I asked.  When something is really bugging you, you bite your nails, but never any other time,” she said.

Damn.  I would need to keep that in check.  “So basically you’ve gone all the way but the actual do,” she said.

“No,” I said.  My hands were in my lap. “And why this utter fascination into my sex life?” I asked.

“It’s just that I see how the two of you look at each other,” she said.

“Yeah, so I should be asking you.  Have you and Brent done it yet?”

She looked away for a moment.  “No, but I am really considering it.  I think if all things are still good, I might on Valentine’s Day.  It will be special then.”

Wow, that was a little less than two months away.  “Really?” I asked surprised she was ready to make that leap.  We really hadn’t been talking much lately.

“I don’t know, Eme.  I love him and he’s so sweet,” she said.

Her previous boyfriend Doug came into my mind.  I didn’t want to be a downer, but she’d claimed to love him to.  But only a couple of weeks after her declaration of love, she’d been done with him.  He hadn’t done anything wrong as far as I knew.  She’d just gotten bored with him.  “Do you love him the same way you did Doug?” I asked, gently trying to get her to think about this.

“Eme, I know what you’re thinking, but I’m sure,” she said.

“Ok,” was my only response.  With hugs again, she left.  Once this thing was over with the killer, if it was over soon enough, I would need to spend more time with Maggie before she did something she regretted.  Ok, I thought I was almost ready too for the big deed.  But Maggie was slightly fickle when it came to boys.

I thought Luke would drive me home, but we ended up at his house.  When we walked in his mother greeted us.  Talk about nervous.  I’d never met her.  And now there she stood not much taller than me.  She looked a lot younger than I pictured.  I’d only seen her a few times but never up close.  She had the golden glow that Luke had.  I must run in her family.  Her long dark hair was a striking contrast to her golden hue.  Her nose was petite yet pointy.  It fit her high cheek bones and striking brown eyes.

“Mercy, I’m so glad to meet you. I’ve heard so much about you,” she said keeping her eyes on me.  Her eyes although brown mirrored the warmth I always felt looking into Luke’s.

“It’s so good to meet you as well,” I said taking her hand which was now outstretched. It was nice to know that one of Luke’s parents approved of me.

“Are you guys hungry?” she asked. “I can make something for you to eat.”

Luke said a bit annoyed, “Mom.” It was one word that clearly indicated he’d thought his mother was going overboard.

“Ok,” she said then looked back at me.  I couldn’t help but take in how tiny his mother was.  My mother wasn’t a tall woman but she’d tower over Luke’s mom.  She was so petite; she could almost pass for a teenager herself.  In skinny jeans and a yellow sweater, she stood watching us.

Luke tugged at my hand so I followed.  His mother didn’t speak.  She just watched us go.  I kind of felt bad.  It almost seemed a bit rude.  He led me the familiar way upstairs.  It appeared that we were going to his room.  It wasn’t like I hadn’t been there before but his mother was home.  I waited for her to say something like what my mom would say.  I am speaking about what my pre-abducted by aliens mother would have said.  It would have been on the lines of ‘leave the door open’.  But Luke’s mom said nothing.  She just watched us go up the stairs.  I knew because I turned back a few times waiting for her to speak.

Behind Luke’s closed door he said, “Sorry, I think she’s been starved for me to bring a girl home for her to meet.”

The weight of that statement was overwhelming.  Luke had never had a girl over to his house when his mother was home.  My silence alerted him to my thoughts because he said, “There wasn’t ever a girl I wanted my mother to meet.”  He’d answered my unspoken question with a grin.  I walked to his loveseat in front of his gaming system and fell into the chair.

“Wow,” I said. “I’m surprised.”

“Don’t say it,” he warned. “Nina’s met my mom long before she was my girlfriend. And besides, she didn’t like her much.”

Mentally, I was pumping my fist in the air. “I wasn’t going to ask about Nina,” I said lying through my teeth.  I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of being right.  His answer had only added to my questions about the girl.  I wasn’t sure why I was so fixated on her.

“Sure you weren’t,” he snorted.  Then he turned and began filling a bag.  That bag meant he was packing to stay at my house.

“Does your mom know,” I said filled with curiosity.

“Know what?” he asked.

I hadn’t really wanted to spell it out but here it goes. “Does she know your sleeping with me,” I said.

When he stood, turned and cocked his head to one side I realized the error of my words.

“She knows that I’m sleeping at your house but I doubt she really could comprehend my fantasies,” he said raising his eyebrows eyeing me up and down.

I turned from him to hide my blush. “Funny,” I said still turned towards the television.

“You’re the one that prances around in your pink sweats bottoms.  What do you expect a guy to think when he looks at your ass with juicy written across it.”

I bit my lip with a smile.  He had a point. “I didn’t think you noticed,” I said flirting back.

“It’s quite hard not to,” he said.  I was sure he didn’t mean the double entendre but a peak at the wicked gleam in his eye made me pause.

I was glad he didn’t kiss me then, because the flirting we started could lead us to no good place with his mother downstairs.  We hung out for a little while before he finally took me home.  His mother wasn’t around when we left.  I finally got it.  Taking me to his house had been a delay tactic.

Chapter Thirty Six

aberration (n.) something that differs from the norm

A birthday dinner was waiting for me in the formal dining room.  Food was laid out on a buffet table.  For the looks of it, I knew they’d order out.  But it was sweet.  I saw steak, asparagus, creamy mashed potatoes, roasted chicken, buttered carrots, wild rice, and a covered box.  I’m sure that was my cake.  As I neared the main table, a platter of crab cakes a Maryland specialty, coconut shrimp, and lobster tails sat in the middle of it.

“Surprise,” my mom said with a toothy grin. This birthday was certainly an aberration with the group assembled for this gathering.  I went to hug her and noticed that besides the baby blue top she wore, she had on a skirt.  My mom and I were a lot alike in that department.  I may have gotten some of my theories from her.  It wasn’t that she didn’t like skirts, but they weren’t practical.  It made me think of Maggie’s gift but I hadn’t had the chance to change.  So my jeans and sweater would have to do.

It was my birthday and she was being sweet so I kept my mouth shut to keep the peace.  Hugging my mom, I stepped away and gave David a hug as well.  Then off in the corner Paul stood.  So this is what Maggie had meant when she told me sorry earlier about not coming over.  I walked over to him.

“Thanks for coming,” I said into his shoulder as he hugged me.  It was a tight hug and one that may have lingered a second or two longer than it should have.  But I would have time to think about that later.  Wincing, I remembered the gift bag in my locker.  I’d forgotten to get it before I headed out with Luke.  I guess it was going to be a surprise because it would be until tomorrow that I would have to look.

We sat to eat dinner.  David sat at the head of the table with my mom to her right.  Paul sat next to her and Flynn sat at the opposite his father.  Luke was next to Flynn, which meant I was next to Luke and directly across from my mother.

Luke led us in gracing our food.  It was only the second time I’d done so and it was still faintly disturbing.  Not that I didn’t believe in God because if demons exist then the opposite would exist too.  I just wasn’t sure if God would care about someone like me.  It was unnervingly quiet after we all said Amen from bow heads for a few minutes.  My mom ushered everyone to serve themselves.

“We’re all family here, no need for formality,” she said still grinning with her hostess smile.  “Paul, we miss you. You know you are always welcome.  You’ve been a fixture in Mercy’s life for what seems like forever.”

Paul and I had only hung out for two years.  But if a stranger had heard her speak, they’d think we’d known each other since diaper hood.   “You should come around more.  I know Mercy is busy these days, but I’m sure she’d welcome a visit from you.”

I wasn’t sure where my mother was going with this but it had to stop. “Mom, Paul has a job, school work, and a very nice girlfriend. He’s just as busy as I am,” I said diplomatically.

“Yeah, I’ve got a lot of things going these days Ms. M.,” Paul said.  Lucky for him, once my mother was married and changed her name which I was sure she’d do. M would still be the first letter. Paul was reddened by my mother’s attention effectively deflected by adding, “Hey, did you all here that Miss Gibson is missing,” he said.  I would have given him cool points for that smooth transition but his words stopped everyone from eating.

Obviously, Paul wasn’t in the loop with all the goings on since we hadn’t spoken much.  But for everyone else at the table we all froze.   Paul being observant noticed.  “Do you all know something I don’t?” he asked.

My mom continuing to show favor for Paul took the liberty to fill him in.  I looked around while everyone finally found their seats again.  Everyone was uncomfortable with my mother’s clear favoritism.  David even looked a bit sorry.  I wanted to reach out and hold Luke’s hand in a show of solidarity.  But we couldn’t eat holding hands.  I guess it was possible but not practical.  So I gave him a smile and hope he got all my meaning.

Then looking off in the distance, I took the time to remember back to Miss Gibson.  I tried to picture in my mind her kissing that guy at school.  Although I hadn’t seen his face, his profile was so familiar.  I was sure I didn’t know him but something about him nagged at me.

After my mom finished, I filled everyone in on the morning kiss I seen yesterday.  “Do you think he could be the guy?” Flynn said.

Everyone was looking at me. “I guess it’s possible.  It was weird but I felt like I knew him,” I said almost absently.

Now I really had everyone’s attention.  “Did you hear him speak?” Luke said.  At first I thought it was an odd question.

“No,” I said. “Why would you ask that?”

“Your dream and the voice you’ve been hearing,” he said.

Now I understood.  But thinking back I didn’t think I heard him speak.  I remembered that she laughed and pointed at us watching them, but I was sure he hadn’t said anything I heard.  “No, I’m fairly sure he didn’t,” I said.

My mom spoke to David. “We should check it out.”

He nodded.  There wasn’t much more to say because we had no leads.  It really sucked to be a supernatural being with no real skills or defenses other than to kiss someone to death.  For the first time, I started to be afraid.  I closed my eyes on a shiver.

Sports were always the topic of choice when the guys outnumber the girls, but this time, it was school.  My mom said to Paul, “Have you decided what school you’re going too?” I’d almost forgotten that he was a senior and would be leaving.  I might have been glad for a subject change but it reminded what I’d be losing soon.

“I’ve narrowed it down to two choices and hopefully I will be accepted to one of them,” Paul said.

My mom beamed at him almost like a proud mother. “I’m sure you’ll be accepted wherever you applied.”

Then she looked at Luke, “How about you?” she said.  It was about time she acknowledged his presence.

Luke said, “I’m hoping to get into Notre Dame,” Luke said.

“That’s a good Catholic school,” she said.  She sounded as though she were disappointed he had a plan.  My heart on the other hand sank.  Luke would be going away and how could I handle that.

“So I hear,” Luke said.

“I thought BYU would be your first choice,” said Flynn with a laugh.

Luke was quick on the draw and had a reply ready. “BYU is a great school but they heard I associated with you and rejected my application immediately.”

Paul, Flynn and Luke all laughed hysterically but I didn’t get it.

Luke finally leaned over and whispered to me. “BYU is a strict religious school that adheres to a high moral standard of conduct including no sex, drugs, alcohol consumption etc.”

“Oh,” I said then giggled a bit to myself late with the joke.

When dinner was over and the table cleared my mother brought in a cake.  Everyone actually sang to me.  I blushed by the attention.  Then I was forced to blow out the candles after making a wish.  The wish had been a tough one but after considerable thought I blew out the single candle.  Gosh, I was seventeen.

“Presents,” my mom said.

She looked at Paul.  He said, “I gave Mercy my present earlier.”  That earned me a look from Luke.  I quickly looked away so no one would see our exchange.

She looked at Flynn. He groaned and got up and went to retrieve a perfectly wrapped gift.  He handed it to me. “Although it was my idea I had help,” he said while I removed the wrapping paper. It was a pretty silver and blue stripped paper with curly ribbon.  It was almost to pretty to open.  Once the paper was removed I saw the pink box and knew what store it was from.  On the inside I pulled out a baby blue velour Juicy Couture sweat suit.  On the back of the jacked was a crown with accented in crystals.  Of course the back of the pants had Juicy written on the bottom.  I smiled at Flynn and said thanks.  Then I looked at Luke.  He smiled at me understanding our little inside joke. We’d just talked about this very thing not a few hours ago.  Good upbringing and common courtesy, led me to get from the table and give Flynn a hug.

“You are an aberration,” I whispered to Flynn.  He looked at me, I winked.  Even though he had help, I wouldn’t have put it passed Flynn to notice that I lived in my pink Juicy sweats.

“You’ll have to thank Maggie too. I dragged her to the mall with me,” he said.  Now I knew the world had ended.  Maggie was helping Flynn buy me a gift.  I wondered if Maggie also helped Luke.  I narrowed my eyes when I walked back to my seat.  But Luke was looking at my mom instead.

He said, “I gave her my present earlier as well.”

I reached for my necklace pulling it up and out of my shirt on display for everyone. My mom being the only girl had a pleasing reaction.  “Wow, that’s really pretty.”

I didn’t point out the inscription on the back.  It was personal.  My mom seemed pleased it was her turn.  She handed me a box on the small size.  I wasn’t a small as a jewelry box though, so I was thrown as to what it could be.  It was wrapped in gold paper with a beautiful gold bow on top.  Underneath was a plain white box.  Still no hints as to what it was.  On the inside were two tickets, two hang tags and a small envelope.  I couldn’t help it, I screamed.  The boys stared at me as I nearly jumped out of my seat.

Flynn said, “What is it?”

I could hardly contain myself. “I’m glad you like it,” said David.

“Oh my goodness, I have front row seats and back stage passes to see Thirty Seconds to Mars in concert,” I squealed.

“Did you open the envelope?” my mom asked.

I opened it to find an American Express gift card worth more than enough to do serious damage at the mall. “You can go shopping for something to wear or whatever?” she said.

I got up and hugged my mom.  Then I hugged David telling them both thank you.  Then I hugged Paul and told him thank you for a gift I hadn’t opened yet.  I didn’t mention that to him though.

At last I hugged Luke.  I almost kissed him but pulled back in time.   That would have been a big faux pas in present company.  When the doorbell rang we all looked at each other until my mom stood up.

“I’ll get it,” she said, heading for the door.   David started to cut the cake while Flynn picked up dessert plates.  We didn’t hear it at first.  Then my mother made a loud gasp.  David hand visible shook with the sound.  He dropped the knife and moved for the dining room door.  Flynn was on his heels.  Paul gave me an anxious look while Luke and I started to stand.  Paul turned and headed to towards the entryway.  It all seemed to happen so fast.  No slow motion for me this time.

Luke took my arm and it seemed odd at the time.  His thumb rubbed across my mouth with more pressure than to be sensual.  Then he kissed me hard and fast.  I wasn’t sure it was appropriate time for this.  But the warmth of his mouth overtook me along with an urge to take from him consumed me.  I would have pushed him away fearing my internal succubus but I felt the first tug.  That stopped me.  It took a few seconds for realization to dawn on me.  It was then I tried to pull away.  Luke was obviously aware of what I was about to do because his hand cupped the back of my head pressing me to him.  I felt the flow of his life force slip into me like hot chocolate poured over ice cream.  Just when I began to enjoy the sensation, he finally pulled away.  Stunned, I stood looking at him with astonishment.  He wasn’t pale gray or blue.  His skin was still the sun kissed golden tan it always was.

“Please stay here,” he said.

I was too dumb struck to argue.  He’d done that on purpose, but I didn’t know why.  My hand automatically went to my throat to finger the necklace he’d given me. I watched him cross to the open doorway of the dining room.  He looked back at me for a second.  In that moment, I saw all his love for me.  I started to move in his direction not wanting him or any of the rest of my family and friends to face the danger I knew deep down was for me.

It would be a moment I would want to take back.  Suddenly, he was lifted off his feet.  His face had changed from love to bewilderment.  Airborne he was blasted into the back wall of the dining room.  I watched how the impact crushed the drywall under his weight.  Then he was lying on the floor lifeless.  Some force of nature had pushed him back nearly through the outer wall.  I opened my mouth to scream.

The voice preceded the person and stopped my voice short. “McKayla,” it said.  It was the voice.  I wanted to run to Luke.  Yet I was frozen in place as a man entered the room.  It was the man from the hospital.  It was the man with Miss Gibson.  It was a man that shouldn’t be here.  He didn’t look a day older than his picture over seventeen years ago.  I knew this man.

Chapter Thirty Seven

inimical (adj.) hostile, enemy-like

When it entered the room, it glided in like a mythical creature of the night.  Dumbstruck for the second time in as many minutes I watched it face me from across the table.

The face turned to me and I did recognize him.  Its facial features were so familiar to mine it all came together in seconds that seemed monumental.  I have its picture in my room at our house before we moved to Flynn’s.

“Dad,” I said.  It looked exactly like him. But it couldn’t be.  I didn’t know if it was really my dad but whatever it was used his likeness.

A smile played across his lips.  It seemed utterly pleased I recognized it.

“McKayla,” the inimical voice said.  It was in his eyes I saw what couldn’t be mistaken for anything less than evil.

The nostalgia wore off that moment. “Why are you doing this?” I said.  It may not have been the best choice for a first question, but my brain really wasn’t working.  Forgive me.  I hadn’t heard anyone move in the house.  Was everyone dead? Luke still hadn’t moved.

“Come with me and I’ll explain,” it said holding out a hand like a bad remake of an old vampire movie.

I uttered the line most victims did until they knew they were beat. “No, I won’t go with you,” I said stubbornly with my chin high in the air.

An orange orb vaguely familiar blazed in its hand.  It barely turned but his movements were clear. “Then I will kill him,” it said, voice emotionless.

The sharp of pain of fear tore free from my soul.  I wanted to yell No, to express my love for Luke, but I didn’t.  I couldn’t let him know how much he meant to me in case that would save his life.

“Fine,” I said.  Ok, I was tired of being the bad remake.  I simply walked around the room and headed for the door not looking back at Luke.  I was afraid if I did, I wouldn’t be able to leave.  When I entered the foyer, the circular table that sat in the middle was crashed to bits.  I hadn’t heard the noise.  I looked to see my mom on the floor in its place.  I rushed forward and now things began to move slower.  I saw David pinned to the wall how I didn’t know.  Flynn laid flat on the floor near his father’s feet.

Looking at the remnants of the room I tripped.  Stumbling to the floor, I realized I fell over what turned out to be Paul.  He looked motionless body and I was torn as to who I should check on first.

With my heart racing, the need for action took over.  “No,” I heard a voice yell.  It took me a moment to realize it was me.

I turned back towards the thing that looked like my father.  I got to my feet and moved to attack.  That was the last thing I remembered.

Waking was like a bad dream.  It’s always strange to rouse in a strange place.  This time was no different.  Confused by my surroundings, I blinked my eyes a few times only to realize I was indeed in a moving vehicle.  One thing was clear was that the sun was shining.  Visibly, I was into the next day, but I wasn’t wearing a watch.  I looked at the dash to see the time was 3:10pm.  How long had we been driving?

“You’re awake,” it said.

As if a wave of revulsion crashed on me I nearly coughed, breathing for air.  It hadn’t been a bad dream.  It or he was real.

“Who are you?” I said.  Weird how bad movie lines are so appropriate at certain moments.  I’d already called him Dad but I had to be sure.

He stared at me longer than I thought he should seeing he was driving a moving vehicle. “Well, I am your dark invader to you, Princess,” he said.  “And to quote a really great movie, I am your father,” he said in a really bad imitation to the original.  This I know because I really love the Star Wars original trilogy.  What’s even more alarming is that he apparently did too.  Did that mean we had things in common?  It was too scary of a thought to contemplate on.  I bit at my nails instead, my tell.  But he didn’t know that.

“But you’ve already guessed that,” he said.   He turned back smoothly to drive.  I didn’t notice if he rode over the middle yellow line because I was too busy watching him while he spoke.

I closed my eyes, stopped biting my nails and covered my face.  “How can that be?  You may look like him, but my father died before I was born?”

“Died I did,” he said indignantly.

“What kind of inimical being are you?  If you’re dead how can you be here?” I asked.

“Being a half demon, you of all people should believe anything is possible.”

I wasn’t going to get into this conversation.  What was more important was what happened at the house.  “Where is my mother?” I asked.

I watched his profile while he drove.  I should have been watching the road for clues to where I was but that didn’t really matter either if I had no one to go home to.  Instead I started biting my nails again.

“They’re all breathing and it’s up to you to keep them that way,” he said.  His voice was cold yet I was warm with relief if I could trust his word.

The next important question was next on my lips. “What do you want with me?” I asked.

“In your world that would be what the million dollar question,” he said.  He laughed to himself then as if he were involved in his own personal joke.  I didn’t find anything funny. “Let me ask you a question, McKayla,” he said.

“Why are you calling me that?” I said, interjecting when I should have remained silent so I could gather the information I needed to figure out how much danger I was really in. I placed my hand in my lap trying not to bite off my finger nails.

“Ah, well the one thing your mother did half right.  Your mother and I talked a lot about the future.  We’d talked about children. And I told her that if ever I had a daughter, I would want to name her McKayla.  And even after everything, she gave you that name.  Her mistake was making it your middle name.”

I’d like the name much more than Mercy but suddenly, I wanted to detest it.  If this man or monster disguising himself as my father liked the name, I should hate it.  Shouldn’t I? I didn’t know much about him, but I saw the destruction he caused at my house.  The sight of my family and friends strew about like pillow feathers had my stomach in knots.  I hoped they were ok.

“I thought you loved my mother,” I said trying to change tactics.  He spoke of her like he despised her.  My instincts of survival woke up.  I watched my surroundings.  We were on a two lane road with large trees on either side.  This was obviously not a major road.  I’d didn’t see any street signs, not even a speed limit sign.

“Yeah, I thought I did,” he said, almost wistfully.  “I was ready to change my whole life for her.  She made me hope that I could be good. But it was nothing but the whore in her that bewitched me,” he spat the words out like bad coffee.

There was more to the story but I had to defend my mother. “She’s not a whore and she loved you.  She hates herself for killing you,” I said with venomous anger. “She keeps pictures of you in a box that she shows me from time to time telling me about all the things you too did together.”

He paused and I thought maybe I got through.  I almost believe he was really my father, but that thought soon passed.  It didn’t stop me from talking to him like he really was. “I know you know how this succubus thing works.  How you can see into the minds of your victims,” he said.

I was suddenly riveted.  I know little about the demon that shared my existence. “She made a choice to end my life.” His voice was just a notch below a roar.

Enraged, I fumed at his words.  My mother was a lot of things and most were good.  My only problem with her was her secrets.  But her motives were pure if I were honest about it. “She would never have done that,” I yelled back.

He turned to me then.  His black orbs of soul absorbing onyx color eyes twinkled as a hint of a smile crossed his face.  My father’s eyes had been hazel like mine.  It couldn’t be my dad.  “She did,” he said evenly.

His words had been to calm with a bit of a growl at the end.  His hands gripped the steering wheel with a faint pop.  He’d broken something.  I couldn’t see anything wrong with the wheel, but I’d heard.  So I kept my mouth shut.  In went my poor nails.  They’d grown out so nicely.  But I needed to occupy my mouth before it put me in any more danger.

I only had ten fingers.  Once I’d done permanent damage to what nails I had, I pushed forward with my questions.  With hands clenched in fist at my lap I turned to him again.   “Where’s Miss Gibson?” I asked.  It or he, I couldn’t decide yet.  But he was definitely the guy at school.  Watching his profile I’d remembered.

“Ah, lovely Ann so pretty and sweet,” he said. “You haven’t answered my question as of yet.”

Feeling defiant when I should clam up, I said, “You never asked me a question.”  I wasn’t sweet with my words.  I didn’t try to butter him up.  With the tenor of my voice, I let him know how much I detested him.

“Ah, I see a part of me stirs in you,” he said.

That clamped my mouth shut.  I wasn’t sure exactly what he was.  But it was evident that it was my anger that reminded me of him.  One thing I was sure of was that he was bad news.

“Tell me McKayla,” he said. “Which of the four boys do you truly love?  See I’ve watched you over the past several weeks and I’m not even sure myself.”

There was no way I was telling him anything about that.  I wasn’t even sure which four boys he was referring too.  “None,” I said trying to keep my voice cold.

He tapped his chin with his index finger. “That could be true.  Your mother was a cold hearted bitch.  Maybe you have more of her in you than I thought,” he said.

I wanted to yell out defending my mother again but thought better of it.  “Let me give you my assessment. I’m leaving out Tony because he was never in contention. The future doctor, well he was too old for you.  You were a bit naughty there,” he said.  “I tried so hard for you to take that one.”

I began to grind my teeth.  Had he been following me all this time? His voice was similar.  Was he the one in my mind trying to control me?

“Where to begin?  I guess the pitiful human boy Paul is a good place to start.  He wants to be your night in shiny amour.  I would have thought he’d be pure of heart, but he’s not.  He’s waiting for you to change your mind.  In the meantime, he’s using that poor girl.  He’s of no use to me.” He laughed a great deal to himself then.  I turned to him, then turned back trying to neutralize my face.  I didn’t want him to see any emotions.  So maybe Paul was safe, then again maybe not.

“Your resident bad boy, I kind of like him.  He sees himself with you if not for his best friend. But he thinks in the end you’ll choose him as you are two of a kind.  He too is of no real use for me.”

I twitched but I remained passive.  How could I believe this thing that sat next to me?  He couldn’t read minds otherwise he wouldn’t have asked the question.

“Then there is Angel boy,” he said.  He had to be talking about Luke.  His face was a bit angelic but Luke was no angel.  His mind and hands at times were none that belonged to an angel, I thought to myself. “He gave you that pretty heart you’re wearing.  He could have given you a cross for all he saved you, not that it would have helped.”

My hands betrayed me by coming to my throat.  I touched the small puffy heart.  It was solid and had a bit of weight to it.   It anchored my task. “He may be of use.  Only time will tell,” he said more to himself.  I wasn’t sure what he meant but I was beginning to believe Luke wasn’t as human as I thought.  This body snatching demon posing as my dead father had carelessly dismissed Paul as human, yet he claimed Luke is even more valuable than Flynn.  I could ask him, but would that diminish my value if I was ignorant.  I kept silent for now.  He may reveal it own his own.

“You certainly have him fooled.  That one loves you even though being with you could damn his soul,” he said gripping the steering wheel hard.

And there is was.  The knowledge lay before me, yet I didn’t know what it all meant.  How could I damn Luke’s soul?  I knew kissing him could kill him, but damn him I didn’t know I had that ability.

“The one I seek wasn’t there tonight huh, Kayla,” he said dragging the name out in a bad imitation of Sebastian.

What did he need with him?  What could a demon offer him?  I was hoping I’d find out without speaking.

“Who would have thought you could tame a demon no less. He’s not half demon.  He is the real deal.  He has no ties to humanity and until you has shown no signs of mercy.” He looked at me then chuckled. “Sorry for the pun on your name. But you have to admit that works in this context.  You make them all beg don’t you.”

I could feel his stare and refused to answer it keeping my attention to the road.  My hands however betrayed me.  I twisted them in and out of fist not knowing what to do.

“He had a task and he failed by his own choice no less.  Could it be the mark on you that tamed the beast?  Maybe the hero will come and save you yet.  I hope he does.”

I wanted to yell What mark and why do you want Sebastian but something in me said he may not know as much as he admits.  He could be baiting me to see what I knew.  But then again, he had power.  He’d pushed Luke into a wall restraining him.  I didn’t know what he was but I kept quiet.

“Do you have his true name?” he asked all of a sudden.

“You should know his name if you know all the rest of it,” I said back.

He tapped his fingers lightly on the steering wheel.  “McKayla, Sebastian or Rat, whatever he is calling himself these days is not his true name.  No he probably wasn’t stupid enough to give you his true name,” it said.

Needing answers, I said, “What does that matter?”

“With his name you can summon him and bind him to do your bidding,” he said.

I did remember Sebastian telling me that he knew when I was in trouble.  Did I know his true name?  I was sure I didn’t.

There had been no signs on the road we’d been traveling the last couple of miles.  I had no idea where we were.  There were nothing but trees and mountains.  I couldn’t be sure we were still in Maryland.  When he turned off on a gravel road, I cringed knowing we were soon to reach his destination.  I couldn’t imagine this road would go on for miles.  No one would travel on such a bumpy road for miles to come.

Soon after, we pulled up to a house.  It was in walking distance to the bottom of a mountain.  Turning back, I saw the trees hid this place good and proper from the road.  The view was picturesque. The two story blue frame house with white shutters.  All it needed was the white picket fence and it would be a watercolor picture come to life.  It did have a faded wooded fence surrounding much of the property.  If felt like a ranch, but I saw no livestock.

He parked and got out. He didn’t wait for me to come he just headed to the door.  That nonchalant attitude of his scared me more.  He was certain I had nowhere to go because he didn’t bother to wait for me.  I trusted he was right and didn’t waste energy on running nor rain on his sense of superiority over me.  It may come in handy later.

Chapter Thirty Eight

abjure (v.)to reject, renounce

He held open the battered white door as I walked inside.  The place wasn’t the size of Flynn or Luke’s house but it was bigger than the home my mom and I had shared up until a few weeks ago.   There wasn’t a fancy grand entranceway.  We simply stood inside the modest living room.  I could even see the kitchen peeking from the back of the short hallway.  The furnishings were sparse and modest.  The sagging beige sofa looked like it had been made when the house was.

Standing a few feet in the doorway, I held my hands folded.  I wanted answers, I just wasn’t sure how to get them.  With no super powers, I stood before the man thing that did have them.  I was so going to take self defensive classes if I made it out of this alive.  “What are we doing here?” I said with my immovable posture.

He looked at me and leaned back against the closed door. “Waiting for one of your suitors to come for you,” he said.

“And if they don’t,” I said defiantly.  I hoped Luke wouldn’t come.  The thing that called himself my father had already bested him.  I didn’t want him hurt over me.

“My bets on Sebastian,” he said. “Luke just doesn’t have it in him.  But maybe if he got his father involved,” he said voice trailing off. “But the old man doesn’t like you at all does he?”

The last wasn’t really a question.  But I wasn’t going to answer anyway.  It did make me think.  I remember the snub Luke’s father had given me along with his disapproving gaze.  How much did this thing know about me?

“The biggest question is who Sebastian will be coming for,” he said, chuckling to himself.

I didn’t’ understand his meaning.  Was Sebastian in cahoots with him?  He stood straight and walked over to me.  I stiffened when he extended a hand to my hair.  Either he didn’t notice or care because he caressed my face.

“You look a lot like my mother?” he said.  He voice was soft and dream like.  But quick and scary like, he seemed to snap out of it. He pulled his hand back. “Don’t worry. I won’t kill you for it, yet.” He’d paused before saying the last word and a chill ran through me.  He had mommy issues.  But so did I, lately at least.  I didn’t want to think this way.  We had nothing in common I tried to tell myself.

I took a long look at him.  I had nothing to say and it was the first time I could really take in the view.  He wore a devil worshiping band tee shirt revealed only because the black leather jacket he wore was open.  I doubt the band itself was more than the hype they created.   But the thing in the shirt could be the devil himself for all I knew.  I hoped he wasn’t the real thing.  The black tee with black jeans and boots had to be just to add to the scare guy persona he was putting up.  But I’d seen him in action and I have to say I was truly scared.  I fought not to show it.

“You ruined my birthday,” I said defiantly.

He laughed. “After seventeen years, I can’t spend one birthday with my daughter,” he said, with his arms folded mirroring my stance.

“My father’s dead,” I said stoically.  I wouldn’t believe he was my father.

He didn’t look angry.  The facial expression he gave me though almost made him look human.  “I wouldn’t believe me either,” he said.  “You and I are a lot alike.”

Back pedaling, I could feel my heart thud at the thought.  “I am nothing like you,” I said, abjuring his evil nature.  This time I had a finger pointed at him.  He looked at me when I realized my fingers aimed and pointed at him like a gun.  I dropped my arm.

“You don’t know me to say that,” he said. “It matters not McKayla.  You will help me.”

I turned my head. His words had been matter of fact.  He knew I would help him.  Would he hurt my mom?  He almost hinted that earlier.  I bit back the tears that came with the thought of my mother being harmed.  Once I had control I return my steel gaze back to his. “What do you want from me?”

“The devil doesn’t make bargains without a price, Kayla,” he said.  The fact that he consistently used Sebastian’s nickname wasn’t lost on me.  He’d alluded to things I hadn’t had time to consider.  Sebastian was a demon through and through.  If what he said was true, Sebastian’s purpose in meeting me was purposeful and not for good.

“What does that have to do with me?” I said.

“You should rest first.  Our night will be a long one,” he said.

“No, I want answers,” I said.

He sighed.  “McKayla, if you’d just listened to me before and done what I’d asked, your mother would not be in danger.  Your weak mind was uncommonly strong when it came to those boys.  So now I had to come get you in person.  Somehow I don’t think you be able to resist now.”

Dusk had already fallen, so did he mean the next day.  I hadn’t looked at the clock in the car before I’d gotten out.  What time was it?  What day was it?  Could I be sure it was only the day after my birthday.  I’d slept and I didn’t know for how long.

“I’m not going to hurt anyone,” I said firmly.

He made a hissing sound.  “Oh, I think you will do whatever I asked.  But for now you need to get rest,” he said.

“I’m not tired,” I protested like a child nearly stomping my feet.  Where had that behavior come from?

But he stepped to me and put a single cool finger to my head.  I felt a burst of heat then blackness.

All light was gone when I woke again.  I sat up and looked around trying to get my bearings.  Moonlight shone through the window, but other than that, I saw nothing.  Waiting, I remained quiet until my eyes adjusted to the night.  As the room came into focus, I could ascertain I was in a bedroom.  I search for a clock and found none.

Sweeping my legs over the side of the bed I laid on, I stood.  My feet were bare.  I hadn’t realized that until now.  The floor was cool and without light I couldn’t be certain but I assumed the floors were hard wood.  It meant I would need to be carefully with my steps.  I could only hope the floors wouldn’t creak.  Slowly, I walked over to the window around the white canopy bed illuminated by the moonlight.   Though the pane of the glass I had a view of the mountain.  It had been the backdrop of the farm house scene we’d drove up to.  That was if I was in the same house.

Sometimes life can be inconvenient.  I needed a bathroom.  Bodily functions wait for no man.  My bare feet padded across the floor.  Thankfully the wood had yet to squeak.  I looked around briefly and didn’t find my shoes.  I wasn’t sure I had time to search for them.  I needed to find a way out after I took care of my immediate need.

There wasn’t a bathroom attached to this room.  Funny how in two weeks, I’d become accustom to my own private bath.  For my seventeen years prior, I’d been used to walking down the hall to the bathroom.  So I did.  I opened all the doors as quietly as possible on my way down the hall, until finally I’d come across the bathroom.  I flicked the light and nothing.  Great, no power or the bulb was out.  Thankfully the bathroom had a tiny window, so I closed the door and took care of business quickly by moonlight.

After I washed my hands, I shook them because I couldn’t find a towel.  Toilet tissue isn’t good for drying your hands.  I opened the door and peered down the hall.  Still there was no movement.  I opened the rest of the doors upstairs.  There were only two more and I discovered that every room was empty of life except mine.

I lightly stepped downstairs.  This house must have been built in the last few years because I had yet to find a weak spot that would alert my presence.  I needn’t have worried.  Once I peeked out the front window in the living room, I realized I was alone.  The car which had been dark in color maybe a Buick wasn’t there.  So I made a quick searched the few rooms on this level.  I didn’t bother with noise, but I did move quickly not knowing when he might return.  The living room, dining room, and kitchen held nothing unusual.

Opening the last door, I found the stairs which led to a dark basement.  Flicking the switch inside the door didn’t turn on any lights down there.  I doubled back to the kitchen and searched the drawers; I came up with a big fat nothing for a flashlight.  What I did find was a pack of old fashion matches.  They were made from wood.  Little sticks slightly thicker than a toothpick about two inches in length and would have to do for light.  The box was full, so surely I wouldn’t run out.

At the top of the stairs, I flicked the first match striking it against the rough end of the box.  Igniting, it burned bright but didn’t provide much light farther from my hand.  I held the first match and took two steps before the flame nearly burnt my fingers.  I shook my wrist a few times before I blew out.  I stopped and lit another.  It turned out to be a long process just to descend the stairs.  I would need to move faster as I had no idea when he would be back.

Finally at the bottom, I lit a new match and circled around.  Before I knew it, the flame had descended again to the nubs of my fingers.  I should have looked for a candle.  This was useless. With the next match illuminating my face, I heard a voice coming from a corner deep into the room.

“Mercy,” the raspy voice said.

First I jumped from the sound that broke the silence.  Automatically, my free hand covered my mouth to squelch a scream.  Then clutching at my chest feeling my racing heart, I froze.  I couldn’t help but be afraid.  The voice knew my name and sounded female, but the dark can make anyone scared.  Swallowing, I shoved my fear aside.  I had to assume that this was one of its victims.  “Keeping talking so I can find you,” I said, still breathing hard from my initial fear.

A tiny bit of light broke the impenetrable darkness. I blew out my match moving with certainty to the tiny light.  My foot kicked something and I nearly tripped.  It had been stupid for me to blow out my light.  But then I was being stupid right now following the unknown voice further into the darkness.  My gut however, warring with my brain, won this particular battle.  I reached the light and it went out.  I kneeled on the floor.  I struck the match holding it up and gazed into the eyes of Bernadette.  She looked haunted and weak.

I should have been afraid of the demon who not too long ago tried to kill me. “Are you ok?” I said.

She swallowed dryly.  I wasn’t sure a demon needed water.  Should I be running to get her some?  This had been the girl who nearly killed me.  But I was better than my enemy. “I’ll go get you some water,” I said.

Her hand still warmed by the flame she produced cupped my wrist.  The match I held burned my fingers.  I had to blow it out leaving us in darkness.  “Let me light another match,” I said.

She let go of my arm.  When I struck the match she spoke, “He’s stealing our power.  I don’t have much left.  He’ll kill me if he takes anymore.”

So that is what he’d been up to.  I had to wonder if all the women he’d taken had not been human.  But first I needed to find a way to get her out of here.  Her words had exposed more. “Who are we?” I said.  Could Miss Gibson be down here?

Bernadette had been propped up half leaning against the wall.  She raised an arm and pointed. I followed the line of her finger through the thin light of the latest match.  When I spotted the lump of figure on the far wall with my eyes which had adjusted to the low light, I started to move.  Her hand was suddenly on me in a vice grip.

“Don’t,” she said.  Her voice was a bit stronger, so I listened.  Not fighting I brought the light back to her face. “Werewolf, she’s in bad shape. She’ll kill you,” she said.

I remembered the girl missing from Chris’s pack.  “What about you?” I ask.

“I’m not human, don’t smell good,” she struggled to say. “I’ve been saving a bit of fire in hopes of stunning the reanimated demon.”

Is that what he was?  It was an interested choice of words.  I had to give them credibility.  She herself was demon and would know better than most what it was.  I didn’t know what to do. “Is there anyone else down here?” I asked blowing out the current match and lighting another.

“No,” she said.  She sounded like she was on the edge of death.  I had to wonder if she had any more injuries.  But in the dark I was unable to tell.  I was about to tell her to save her breath when she spoke again.  “Where’s angel boy?”

I paled. It had used that term as well.  When referring to my captor when had I gone back from him to it?  But I needed answers so I pressed ahead. “Who are you talking about?”  Maybe it wasn’t the time but I had to know.

“Your boyfriend, the one with the angel light in the woods,” she said her voice fading with each word.

I didn’t feel the burn of the fire right away. My mind had drifted back to the lake and Bernadette chasing us.  There had been a bright light that I had relegated believing it the headlights of a car.  That light had preceded Bernadette’s departure and preceded Luke’s entrance in the woods.  Thinking back, we hadn’t come across a close road when we’d made our way back to the house.  I hadn’t given it a second thought.  There was also the light at the party when Sebastian tried to warn me.  That light came at us when Luke was headed our way.  Luke had been afraid he’d hurt me.

“Luke’s no angel,” I said more to myself but I’d said it out loud.  That was just ridiculous.

“No, he’s nephilim. Teenage angels don’t exist because they aren’t born.  But powerful like angels he is.”

“What’s nephilim?” I asked.  But I remembered the book at Luke’s house in the Hamptons.  They were the offspring of an angel and a human woman.  My mind was racing when she answered not knowing I’d already figured it out.

“Half breed like you,” she said.

My match below out as a light movement in the air blew it out.  I was stuck with instant fear.  Should I risk lighting another match to see what caused the breeze in a closed basement?

“Kayla,” a voice said. Iridescent eyes looked back at me

I recognized that voice. “Sebastian,” I said.  My father or dang it whatever it was, was right.  I struck a new match. I took the flash of the light to get a good look at him.  When his handsome face came into view my heart stopped for a moment.

“Your father’s coming.  We need to go,” he said.

He confirmed what I hadn’t wanted to swallow.  The monster was my dad.

“We can’t. You need to take Bernadette and the werewolf girl,” I said with my arm extended in the direction of where I thought the girl was.  I wasn’t sure he could even see my arm in the darkness.  His eyes followed my hand which held the lit match pointing.  I looked that way too.  I couldn’t see her.  Furthermore, I hated I didn’t know the girl’s name.

“Kayla, that will take a lot of power and I won’t be able to get back to you until I recharge,” he said sounding almost panicked.

It didn’t matter.  I couldn’t let them die for me.  I was certain that I would survive for a while at least.  My demon dad didn’t seem like he was in a hurry to kill me.  He hadn’t bothered to secure me.  “I’ll be fine,” I said, sounding more sure than I felt.

The next words out of his mouth couldn’t have stuck me more speechless than a sledgehammer.  “Bernadette kiss Kayla,” he said.

We both turned to him in the dying match light.  I couldn’t see her clearly, but I was certain her facial expression matched mine.  “What!” we said in unison. Our combined voices held the same edge of complete confusion by his request.

“It’s not what you think.  Based on Bernadette condition, I guess that you dad is taking her power,” he said.

“Yeah,” I said back, like that really a suitable reason for his request.  I wanted to see his eyes but my match went out again.  I lit another.

“So he must be able to absorb power.  If he bargained for revenge, then he’s been given the same gifts as the instrument of his revenge.  This to even the odds,” he said.  Bernadette didn’t speak.  She must have realized where he was going with this.  I on the other hand still need more convincing.

“What does that mean?” I asked.  I held the dying light as close to his face as I dared.

Bernadette spoke up, “He thinks that you too should be able to absorb power.”

“Ouch,” I said. The flame reached my fingers. I shook them and hesitantly blew a little air on the sting from the burn.

I could feel Sebastian move while we sat for a moment in darkness. “We don’t have a lot of time. I hear the car on the gavel road approaching ever near.”

I stuck another match.  Bernadette moved closer.  Apparently we were all in agreement even though I hadn’t given consent.  I didn’t have time to think.  When her lips were a fraction from mine, I blew out the fire.  I didn’t want to see.  Her lips were softer than I expected.  Fire burned across them.  It wasn’t sexual.  Her raw power passed to me in a scorching flame.  Thankfully it was over quickly.  She pulled back and I was grateful.

I stuck another match.  Feeling a bit awkward, I had been grateful for the darkness.  In the light, I saw Sebastian look at me. “Now it’s my turn,” he said.

I didn’t have to think about this. “You need your power to save them,” I protested.

He didn’t bother to say anything.  Suddenly his hands were on my arms drawing me near.  The match was still lit in my hand between the three of us.  His mouth found mine and he kissed me.

It wasn’t quick.  His hand was in my hair pressing my face ever closer to his.  I wasn’t sure we could be any closer.  I felt it when it began to happen.  It was different than it had been from Bernadette.  It wasn’t scorching.  With no other way to describe it, it was cool but with an undercurrent of heat if that was possible.  My mouth parted underneath his mouth and he deepened our kiss.  I found myself just as the flame died in my hand feverishly kissing him back.  The power exchange reminded me of something that I had no time to process.

He pulled away abruptly. “He’s here,” he said quickly.  He jumped to his feet and moved so fast across the room, the flame of the match I just struck died.  When he came back, he held a lifeless girl in his hands.

“Take her back to the lake,” I instructed.  I wasn’t certain but I thought he nodded.  He bent down and hooked an arm around Bernadette.  “I’ll be back as soon as I can,” he whispered.

I needed to tell him two things before he left.  In the brief silence I finally heard the car come now.  “Just tell my mom, Luke or somebody where I am,” I said.

“I’ll be back,” he said taking a couple steps back.

“One more thing,” I said hoping to get this answered before it was too late. I didn’t know how to use the power they gave me. “How do I use the power?”

The car came to a stop.  I heard the door open.  Time was up.  I was on my feet.  I dropped the box of matches and I was moving towards the staircase on memory.  I stumbled a few times while making my way up.

“Use your mind,” Sebastian said and his voice faded and I knew he was gone.  His words had been no help at all.  At the top of the landing, I closed the door to the basement as quietly as I could.  Then I made my way up the staircase to the second level.  I’d just reached the top with the floor squeaking under my weight, when the front door opened.

Chapter Thirty Nine

iniquity (n.) wickedness or sin

I didn’t have my breathing under control when he walked through the door.  I held my mouth covered by my hand not sure what to do.  Looking at the ceiling, I prayed that the squeaky wooden floor hadn’t given me away.

There was some shuffling of feet that made me look down towards the door.  The way the staircase was configured, I didn’t have a clear view of the door from where I was.  I could just make out the lower half of the it.

“You’re up,” he spoke, closing the door.

All I could see of him from the top of the stairs was a pair of legs next to the bottom half of the front door.  I was trying to bring my breathing down but I had to say something. “Are you going to let me go?” I asked.

He could hear a wry smile in his voice. “McKayla, you just got here,” he said.  “Come down so we can talk.”

“I don’t yet know what you want from me, but I have school tomorrow,” I said, taking the stairs slowly back down.

He laughed a boisterous laugh.  He grin faded and he looked at me with empty eyes, “There are more important things than school, Kayla.”  He tossed a bag on the sofa next to me and headed back towards the kitchen.  I wasn’t sure he’d go downstairs but I had to stop him.

“Just tell me what you want, so I can get back to my life,” I said turning and holding the back of the sofa with my knees pressed firmly in the cushions.

He turned around. “What life was that?” he asked.  He didn’t wait for me to respond. His arms spread wide as if to encompass the room. “You’ve created a mess of it.  You don’t know how to use the power you have.  Your boyfriend is the one guy you can’t have.”

The words stung so I struck back. “So what do you need me for then,” I said through gritted teeth.

“If not for bait, then I will teach you what your mother has so far neglected.”

I wanted to turn around, fold my arms and poke out my lip but I didn’t.  “What did you do that my mother found so distasteful?” I asked not sure I wanted to know.

He stepped forward his eyes hungry with delight.  His grin deepened and there was nothing warm about it.  His eyes darkened if that’s even possible. “They call me Romeo,” he said.

My eyes must have looked like a saucer of milk with an Oreo cookie floating in the middle when my brain finally registered.  The newscasters had related the deaths of recently missing young women back to a serial killer from the past.  They wondered if this was a copycat crime of the killer called Romeo over seventeen years ago.  Years ago one reporter dubbed the killer Romeo because it had been clear that each woman had fallen madly for their killer.  He had left love letters and poetry in the victims’ homes.  Evidently, he wanted to be famous because he even started signing that name in the victims’ blood.  I hadn’t paid much attention to that part of the story because I was too wrapped up in my own life.

I took a tentative step back towards the stairs and door. “And my mother,” I said.  My mother had been in love with him too.

He move over to the couch, by that time my feet were backing into the wall next to the staircase.  The faint bump of my feet made such a small noise, yet it reverberated in the room.  His face went soft.  I had to wonder if he was reliving the nostalgia of their relationship in his mind.  “I met Julie at the hospital.  I was stuck at first by her beauty then by her kindness,” he said.

“And,” I said, adjusting to a compassion I heard in his tone. I fisted my hands together looking first down then away.  I almost felt like I was intruding on a kiss in the way he looked out into space past me like I wasn’t standing there.

“And she was my Juliette, my muse.  She was going to round out the set, but I fell for her.  I didn’t believe it at first, but I fell in love.”  I could almost believe him human in the wistful look he had.

His eyes had gone glassy. “You look like her you know,” he said.  Feeling his stare, I met his gaze dead on.  Moving like a man with purpose, he’d stepped around the couch.  Feeling trapped, I turned to trying to make a decision for the door or the stairs.

“Like you mother,” I asked, tearing my attention between him and the door.

“Her too, you are a combination of your mother and mine, the two women I hate most in the world.”

Before I didn’t think he would hurt me, but he wasn’t looking at me anymore even though his eye stared into mine while moving towards me.

“Dad,” I said softly.  The word shocked me so I thought it might shock him.  He stopped moving. Caught in a web of trying to understand each other, we fell into a standoff.

He was quicker on the draw than I was. “Kayla, my stay in hell showed me the truth.  Your mother’s act of innocence was just that.  You can’t fool me with soft words.  The torment I had to suffer through as punishment for my sins deadened any humanity you may think I have.  Thankfully, someone saw my potential and offered me a deal or rather a pardon for a price of course.  And I need your gifts to help me achieve those ends.”

Now I was sure I was in trouble. “And what’s the price?” I asked fearful it was me.  But I held my head up.  Sebastian hinted that my father may have bargained for his soul for revenge.

“Souls,” he said.  His word was chilly, ringing out like icicles in the wind. He held his hand out.   I thought he was beckoning me to him.  I was ready with a rebuff when someone walked into my line of vision from the hallway leading to the kitchen.

Feeling like I swallowed a balloon filled of helium, I struggled to stay steady on my feet.  How could this be?  He looked just like he had two years ago all full of innocence.  His signature baseball cap was on his head, yet he shuffled towards my father like a zombie would.

“Paul,” I cried out.  How had he gotten here?

Paul came to a shuffling stop in beside my father.  Its hand lifted towards me to stop me from coming any closer.  I paused in my forward progress afraid of how he might hurt Paul if I didn’t obey.  “What do you want?” I asked.

My father moved fluidly, contrasting Paul’s stiff steps with a stride like his glided just above the floor.  His movements were graceful and I couldn’t help but to watch.  He took my arm with the barest of pressure.  I was jolted away like the blast that had lifted Luke in the air.  No longer was I in control.  My scream echoed off the inner layers of my skin never reaching anyone’s ears but my own.  “Kayla,” he said, using Sebastian’s name for me, taking my hand. “You have such lovely eyes.”

Guiding me, I knew what was going to happen and had no way to stop it. “I need your potential reached.”

It only took a few steps to reach Paul who stood so still I wondered what trance he was under.  Confused however by everything, I also notices my movements weren’t awkward.  I moved with a fluidity that reviled my father.

My father clapped the Paul on the back.  The boy didn’t move under the force of it. “I need you to be a sport and take one for the team,” he said.

Having no choice, I watched from the rafters of my mind.  She moved my hand and took Paul’s hat from his head tipping it off to fall to the ground in a swift movement.  Oddly, I felt the touch of his hair but from a distance that wasn’t quite right.  She gripped his head tight pulling his head down to meet mine.

I could feel through her his slight resistance.  He like me had no choice in the matter.  She pressed my lips to his while I silently cried, feeling helpless.  A wave of energy cascaded through me.  The golden hue of it filled the spaces that the inky blackness of my succubus didn’t occupy.  Very faintly, I thought I heard him speak.  I swore he said he loved me.  But his mouth was busy with mine.

Finally, I started to understand the succubus.  The entity that shared my body stood empty able to make its own decisions.  All I needed to do was to slip the skin of it like a costume and take control.  It couldn’t have been that simple.  But I jumped down from my perch at eye level.  As I fell from my high vantage point, my soul seemed to expand to fill all of me.  I pulled the black mist over me like perfume.  It took more time than I imagine it should but when it was done, it felt like a snug fit.

My eyes opened anew for the first time.  Through them I saw Paul’s life slipping away and into me.  I stepped back jerky with my first step.  Paul swayed on his feet before he crumpled to the floor.  I wanted to reach out to break his fall, but I wouldn’t have given myself away.

Knowledge in the form of images races over me like an insane slide show.  I understood it all with the force of comprehension hitting me.  I knew what I had to do.  My dad was only a few steps away watching the show like an inspector.

I closed my eyes knowing he might understand what I’d done if he saw my eyes and not hers.  But we were one now.  Like Flynn, I was in control of all of me.

“Good, Kayla,” he said closing the distance between us. “McKayla, I know you can hear me.  This was all for the best.  He was only human. There is so much we can do together.”

Yes there was.  I truly understood what Luke was now.  I knew just what his angel light could do.  Keeping my eyes tightly shut, I remembered our final kiss.  Luke had somehow known and tried to protect me.  He’d given me some of his power.  I wanted to cry thinking that what I must do may mean I wouldn’t see him again.

But there wasn’t time for goodbyes or to even check on Paul.  I had to hope he’d be ok.  I couldn’t allow my father to go and collect souls for the devil.  People had to make their own choices.  He couldn’t be allowed to walk the earth.  I understood what my mother had done and how hard it must have been for her.  My father was right.  She had decided to end his life, just I was going to do now.

Luke’s angel light could vanquish a demon back to its origins.  Sebastian’s power could take me there with a destination.  I would use those powers in tandem to bind me to my dad so I could make sure he met his end and maybe my own.

With him standing before me, I opened my eyes.  His met mine.  I raised my hand and a spark of blue flame lit my finger just in case.  He looked at my hand then at me.  His eyes darted to the back of the house.  I was sure he’d figured it out.  His hand raised and I felt a force around my neck.  I’d waited a second too long.  I threw my other hand up and tossed a ball of flame on him. The flame lit around him like a torch.  But it wasn’t fire because nothing in the room that touched him ignited.

“McKayla,” a deep guttural voice emitted from his mouth that wasn’t human at all.  He still had a solid hold on my throat and my oxygen depleted brain waned.  I thought about the angel power and a light began to emit from my body but it was too late.  The light began to dim.

The door behind us burst open and angel light filled the room.  I felt his hold drop and I bent forward to gasp in air.  Time didn’t stop and my father wasn’t yet defeated.  He was fighting the blue demon fire that held him encased in the angel light.  I knew then what needed to be done.  I stood and took in a deep breath.  Stumbling forward I clasped the fire encased monster and focused.  Calling upon Luke’s and Sebastian power, I used the angel light as a destination and the other as my one way ticket there.  It wasn’t like falling this time.

We landed in a heap.  The fire cocoon of my dad stood writhing looking much like a flame encased Academy Award statue.  The flame was no longer blue but a deep orange tilting towards a rose red.  Even with the glow of the flame, the darkness was absolute here.  The cool stone that lay beneath me oddly enough sent a chill through my body.  With goose bumps creeping up my arm, I lay looking up at my father.  His cries and moans of suffering were immense.  I nearly covered my ears to hide from his agony that I’d inflicted on him by bringing him back.

I finally looked around.  What I saw chilled me more.  More than thousands of blazing cocoons stood in an endless field of orange. Although each glowed bright, none pierce the complete darkness.  I could see nothing but the individual flames and blackness.  I couldn’t even see my own hand in front of me.

When the guilt crept up on me, I was sure it was a normal reaction to the choice I made.  Had I done the right thing to bring my dad back?  Did he deserve to die at my mother’s hand?  I felt the pain of sadness descend on me like the darkness all around me.  The cloud of iniquity was heavy on my chest.  I was sin and I would damn Luke. I’d kissed Sebastian.  I was such a bad person.  I was mean to my mother.  I didn’t deserve love.  Everything I done and worried about crossed through my brain like a lightning rod.  I heard the cries and realized they were mine.  I couldn’t stop the guilt from coming. I’d hurt Paul my best friend.  I hadn’t trusted Maggie. I’d been jealous.

Startled by the contrast of the warmth on my legs from the cool place I laid, I looked down in the direction where my legs were.  The red ribbon of flame wrapped first around my foot.  A searing the pain radiated up my leg.  I had a just one moment of clarity.  I needed to get out of here.  This was a place of suffering.

I tried to focus for a brief moment letting my intended destination settle in my mind.  But as the flame rose up my calf mummifying me, I knew it wasn’t working.  Sebastian probably didn’t gift me enough power for a round trip.  Of course I doubted he thought I would have had hell as my intended destination.

Movement across the vast endless area caught the corner of my eye.  I felt more than saw the darkness coming forward.  It blotted out the orange figures as it seemed to move towards me.

My sin, weighted like a boulder, pressed on my chest.  While my mind drifted to Luke and escape, flame began to cover all of my legs.  I screamed not sure what I was more afraid of the flame or the looming darkness. My body went ridged stretching me straight flat against the ground.  My lips were forced closed.  My cries were still loud ringing in my head.  Would I spend eternity here?  The darkness would be here soon.

A rush of gratefulness quieted my internal screams when I felt a hand under my head. Then another moved under my waist.  I felt myself being lifted up.  I could neither see nor speak but I heard the voice.

“We got to get out of here.”

I should have relaxed, but the voice only reminded me of my various sins I committed.  I moaned, wanted nothing more than to beg for forgiveness but my mouth didn’t move.

Chapter Forty

culmination (n.) the climax toward which something progresses

Air, was the first thing I thought when I sat up gasping in my room.  If anyone were in the room they might have thought I’d risen from the dead the way my body lean up with my legs still stretched in front of me.  A thick beam of sunlight streamed in through the window.  I sat in glory of the light, thankful I’d survived.

I looked around but I knew I was alone. Quickly, I pulled my feet out from under the covers and inspected them.  There were no burn marks or any sign of my stint in hell on them or my legs.  Standing, I wiggled my extremities to make sure everything was in working order.

Grateful again, I felt like I needed to pray to thank God for saving me.  It hadn’t been him directly, but somehow I knew it wasn’t the other who saved me from my sins.  I pressed my hand to my heart because it was pounding with the memory of what I’d gone through.  The sorrow I felt was gone but not forgotten.  I had to make amends.

My decision had been made.  I wouldn’t condemn Luke to that fate I suffered.  He didn’t deserve to be damned.  I wasn’t sure anyone should endure that much anguish.  Stepping to the window resolved with what needed to be done, I looked out my window onto the vast back yard.  I saw Flynn sitting on a patio chair.

Maybe I was avoiding what was to come, but I found myself in the bathroom freshened up first.  Somehow I doubted anyone would care, but I needed to look myself in the eye.  The vision in the mirror wasn’t as bad as I’d expected, but it wasn’t good either.  I spent a few minutes brushing my teeth and combing my hair.  I still had no idea what day it was or how long I’d been gone.  So when I stepped out of the bathroom, I was comfortable that at least I wouldn’t offend anyone with halitosis.  I nearly stopped and turned on the television to the weather channel to see the date and time.  But that wouldn’t accomplish anything but possibly distressing me.  So I walked passed.

Silently, I moved through the quiet house expecting someone to greet me along the way, but no one did.  Had I been out so long that everyone moved on with their daily lives waiting for me to wake?  I guess it was just as plausible that I hadn’t been out that long and they’d expected me to be out longer.

As warm as it looked from my closed window it was brisk outside.  The air snaked through the sweater I’d pulled on before coming out here.  I wanted to turn back for a coat.  It was too late.  I saw Flynn stand.

“Mercy,” he said.  His eyes lit up like Christmas upon seeing me.  Had I been that close to death?  They way he looked at me, you’d think he’d expected the worse.  I walked over to him and let him take me in his warm hug.

“Where’s my mom?” I asked.  Although I appreciated Flynn’s support, what I ached for was my mother.  Funny how in trying times one needs more than anything the warmth of home.  My mom was home to me.

“She and David just left to pick up Chinese.  We had to force her to leave the house.  She’s been at you side nonstop,” he said.  Gently he rubbed my back.  I sank deeper into his arms.  He’d been a good friend.  More than I had expected.  I shook the thoughts my father planted in my head about Flynn’s intentions. It wasn’t true.

I pulled back to ask him where everyone else was.  But when I looked into his gorgeous face, something in his eyes warned me.  Maybe I still didn’t believe what I saw, because I stood there searching his eyes.  His head descended to mine in the unmistakable movement that led to his yielding mouth pressed to mine.  I stiffened but didn’t move.  My brain just didn’t want to accept what was happening.  Frozen in place, I let him press his lips to mine firm and sure.  I hadn’t yet accepted his kiss nor had I kissed him back.

Out of the corner of my eye, I discerned movement to my right.  It made me jerk away from Flynn.  If Luke caught this, I would punch Flynn or maybe even knee him in the groin.  But when I turned, I saw Paul’s grim face.  He back away much in the same fashion I did with my dad, cautious and angry.

I turned back to Flynn.  My rage filled my hand in an open hand slap across his cheek that caused his head to turn from the impact of it.  I pushed away from him and began to move in the direction Paul retreated.  He was heading towards the front of the house.  In the time it took me to slap Flynn, Paul had disappeared around the corner.

“Paul, please wait,” I yelled.  I was so glad he was ok.  I wanted to apology for nearly taking his life again.  I was nearly at a run chasing him around the corner.  He’d moved fast in his distaste for what he saw and misinterpreted.  When I caught sight of him, he had his car door open.

“But Paul, I love you,” I said crying out.  I wasn’t sure why those were my words, but nothing was going as planned.  I was trying to straighten all this mess out.  I wanted things to go back to the way they were.  But I would rationalize later that Paul must have been too far away to hear me.  This was because he didn’t turn or make any gesture acknowledging me.  He just hopped into his Mustang and drove off before I could reach him.

I was furious with Flynn and spun on my heels to go give him a piece of my mind.  If the slap I’d given him before hadn’t done the trick maybe additional words would.  Instead, I found myself face to face with Luke.  My heart sank.  I wasn’t yet ready to face him.  My seeing him for the first time since my brush with death caught my breath.  What I felt for him was magnified.  I wish things could be different.  But hell was a wakeup call.  So I gripped onto my only defense with my need for him weakening my resolve.  Luke had lied to me.  Well, omission of truths was just as bad as lying.  Something in his eyes gave me pause.  I realized he’d heard that last bit that I’d said.  Back pedaling in my head, I needed to explain because I was sure he misunderstood my words.

“Luke, I,” I said, when his hand touch my cheek in a gentle caress.

“Shh,” he said. “Let me speak.”  His voice was gentle yet stern and I found myself mute.  “I always knew you love him, but I’d hoped that maybe I was wrong,” he said.

I wanted to tell him that he misunderstood when I remembered that in the end, I had to break up with him for safety of his mortal soul.  So instead of calming words of explanation I uttered heated words that bubbled from my mouth.  “Were you ever going to tell me what you were?” I said with malice.

He looked away quickly almost as if I slapped him.  Starring at something beyond me he spoke, but not really to me but at me. “I’m sorry about that.  Flynn seemed to think it was better you didn’t know,” he said.

Irate couldn’t describe what I felt now. “You let Flynn determine our relationship.  You trusted him more than me,” I said so loudly he winced.

He recovered quickly and still calmly he said, “It doesn’t really matter now.  I won’t be second to anyone else.”  He looked in the sky for a moment.  “I love you, Mercy,” he said looking in my eyes again.

It was the first time he said it.  My heart broke knowing we couldn’t be together.  He drew me in and kissed me.  And like all the other times we truly kissed it was like magic.  I felt like I was floating away until he pulled back. “But I won’t share your heart with Paul,” he said dryly and all the magic was just as suddenly pulled out of the air.

There were many things to say, but none really matter at the moment.  “It was your angel light that saved me,” I said suddenly calmed by his admission of love.  I gazed into his blazing blue eyes.

“I’ll always be there to protect you Mercy, no matter what.  But you have to decide,” he said then pulling his hand away from my face he looked at me that final time and walked away.

I could have stopped him.  And maybe I should have stopped him to explain everything.  I could have told him that my love for Paul was a brotherly love.  I could have explained that I loved him too.  But there are times like this when the words from an old saying said it all.  If you love someone you let them go.  Yes, there was a second half to that particular saying, but I loved Luke enough not to put him in harm’s way.  My fingers reached for the necklace he’d given me and relief washed over me when I felt it was still there.  I would be content with loving him from afar.

I wasn’t going to turn around to see him go for fear I might run after him.  But I couldn’t help it, I turned anyway.  Before he reached his car he looked up and our eyes met.  I felt the tears begin to well up, but I held them back.  I wouldn’t let him see me cry.  His goodness may bring him back to me, not wanting me in pain.  Nor would I give in to the pain.  So I walled up my heart behind a brick façade I built, watching his car pull away.  I would give up all guys again.  Nothing good had come breaking my own rule.  My mom would be so pleased.

Stomping my way back to Flynn, I allowed my fury to build again.  My pain was now balled up in the form of rage and I knew just the person I could release it on. “You arrogant jackass.  I thought you were my friend,” I hissed out at him with words I knew he’d understand while I jabbed my finger in his solid chest.

“Mercy, neither one of them was any good for you,” he said unmoving letting me jab him with my finger.  He was going to stand there and take whatever I dished out.

“Luke is your best friend,” I said my voice breaking which angered me more.

“Which is why I told him like I’m telling you that he is angel and you demon, it can never be,” he said.

I found myself going to slap him again.  His hand came up and caught mine.   “It wasn’t your place to decide,” I said pulling free from his grip.

I started walking off the patio.  I didn’t walk past him through the door to the house but headed around the opposite side from where Paul and Luke escaped.  I wasn’t sure when David and my mom would return, but I need time to cool off.

Flynn called out to me. “You and Paul are no good Mercy,” he said. “He is human and that can never be either.”

I turned to him, stopping halfway to the side of the house.  I didn’t yell, but spoke loud enough that I knew he heard me. “You and I could never be either. Even if I thought maybe, I could never be with you because of who you are,” I said.  I would let him decide what I meant.  Although Flynn had shades of goodness, his manipulation smelled of what I knew about him prior to me getting to know him.  I’d assumed people had him pegged wrong.  But now I was certain he had been manipulating me all along.

If I’d bother to look back, I may have notice Flynn kicking a lawn chair and stubbing his toe.  Maybe I would have seen the self loathing and regret in his face.  But I didn’t turn except to round the corner of the house.

I wasn’t sure I could possibly have any more surprises today but it was obvious today was a day full of them.  Caught with a slight flutter in my chest, I saw him.  I wonder if it was just a remembrance to our one and only kiss.

“Sebastian,” I said in surprise.

He looked at me with his blue eyes and for the first time I saw a flicker of something in them.  He moved so swiftly to me, I thought maybe he’d blink over in one of his genie moves.  We were so close and I could see myself reflected in his blue pools vision.  Was there something more?  Was there life now in those previously dead eyes of his? Could I trust him completely?  He had saved my life but he was also a demon predator and could just as easily take my life too.

“You came for me,” I said. Luke had saved me at the house.  But it was Sebastian who’d saved me from hell.  Not that I thought Luke wouldn’t have come if he could have.  But only a demon could enter and escape alive.

“Always,” he said. He smiled at me almost waiting.  I could swear that this time the smile did reach his eyes.  Could it be a trick of the light?

If Flynn and my dad were right about all the guys in my life being so wrong for me and Flynn sure he was the obvious choice because we were the same species for lack of a better word.  Wouldn’t Sebastian also be a viable candidate?  This was crazy because a second ago, I’d sworn off boys.  But I could feel the heat rise in me.

“Kayla,” he said.  His nickname for me crooned off his tongue and I felt that something tremble inside me.  Would I have time later to decide if it was me or the succubus that reacted to him?  I’d known for a while that the succubus was clearly interested, but I needed to know if I was.

Like oppositely charged magnets, this was a culmination of the all events that led until now.  When he leaned down and in, not moving I waited.

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Table of Contents

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty One

Chapter Twenty Two

Chapter Twenty Three

Chapter Twenty Four

Chapter Twenty Five

Chapter Twenty Six

Chapter Twenty Seven

Chapter Twenty Eight

Chapter Twenty Nine

Chapter Thirty

Chapter Thirty One

Chapter Thirty Two

Chapter Thirty Three

Chapter Thirty Four

Chapter Thirty Five

Chapter Thirty Six

Chapter Thirty Seven

Chapter Thirty Eight

Chapter Thirty Nine

Chapter Forty